Our Friendly World with Fawn and Matt - Friendship Tools

The invisible line, the invisible barriers that we need to be aware of that will set us free. So the invisible barriers we are dealing with that hold us to certain places in situations, the invisible barriers invisible lines that keep us from connecting to each other.

They're all over the place and they come in so many different forms. We discuss some invisible acts of power when once we realize and are aware of them, allow us to break free from the chains that bind us and keep us from living a free life and enable us to create beautiful friendships/relationships.

 

The Invisible Line - TRANSCRIPT

[00:00:00] Fawn: Hello everybody. Welcome back. Hello. So the invisible line, the invisible barriers that we need to be aware of that will set us free. So the invisible barriers we are dealing with that hold us to certain places in situations, the invisible barriers invisible lines that keep us from connecting to each other.

[00:00:24] Fawn: They're all over the place and they come in so many different forms. But first of all, what are some invisible acts of power? We already did a show, remember with Rachel Chevalier from France, and we talked about grid lines, power lines, right? That are deep in the earth that you can't see. But your body definitely feels, and it changes your health, it changes everything.

[00:00:51] Fawn: Lay lines.

[00:00:52] Fawn: Remember that?

[00:00:52] Matt: Yes. Absolutely. Is it red blood cells? They're affected by magnetism. It's one of those weird things. It's one of the reasons why, No, it's something in the blood. It's not the red blood cells, but it's something in the blood.

[00:01:03] Matt: We have this in our bodies, determine which way north is, which is a bizarre

[00:01:08] Fawn: thing. Like birds have it right? It's a mineral that exists that it, it's some sort of, Metal or something. Some kind of metal that I think birds have more of.

[00:01:21] Fawn: More

[00:01:21] Matt: iron in the blood. That's what it is.

[00:01:23] Fawn: I thought it was something else like, I don't know. Whatever. Doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Cause I don't wanna get into the science of it. I wanna get into the energetics of it. I mean, which is still science. Nevermind what I just said, . But what I'm trying to say is, You know, there are also EMFs, right?

[00:01:41] Fawn: Electro magnetic fields. Electric, is it electric or electromagnetic field?

[00:01:46] Fawn: I think it's

[00:01:46] Matt: electromagnetic.

[00:01:47] Fawn: Um, so, you know, microwaves or radio waves, there's all this stuff that we can't see true. So there's that. But what I'm talking about are like, in our society, these invisible lines that half of the population doesn't cross.

[00:02:02] Fawn: For example, there's so many different examples, but one example I have is I had, you know, I grew up in la there were so many kids that had never seen the ocean, and they were like 10 miles away. I'm like, You've never in your life seen the ocean. We, we, we live right there in L.A. And they're like, No. And then as I got older, I realized why. There is this invisible, um, fence.

[00:02:31] Fawn: That keeps certain people out of certain

[00:02:34] Matt: neighborhoods. And there's also the level of comfort, right? I'm uncomfortable getting away from wherever it is. I am.

[00:02:42] Fawn: Yeah. But why that, that level of uncomfortableness that exists was placed there for a reason by some force to keep people separat.

[00:02:54] Fawn: Anyway, I'm trying not to get negative here. So anyway, invisible acts of power. When I tell you that, when I say invisible acts of power, what comes to your mind? Like for me, I'm thinking about ghosts, angels, random acts of kindness. Of course, I think about the invisible fences, and I just brought up.

[00:03:15] Fawn: Kindness, compassion. There's also going back to the science of it, there's magnetic force, electrical force, there's external forces and internal forces like, and I know I'm getting into science, but here we go, like a tree trembling due to wind. That would be an external force. You can't see it, but you see the tree trembling something's making the tree tremble.

[00:03:40] Fawn: Or something's making me tremble when I feel something that's scary or something makes me feel a certain way. I'm like, We gotta get outta here. Right? Which happens a lot, . Yes, it does. Or we're anywhere. It could be anywhere. I'm like, We gotta get outta here. And now we've been together long enough where Matt doesn't really question it.

[00:04:01] Fawn: He's like, Okay, let's go

[00:04:06] Matt: Right. See, Whereas I think of it as invisible forces for me, you know, music plays such an important part of my life, but it's not, it's not, You can't see music necessarily unless somebody's literally performing it in front of you. But you can hear it invisible though.

[00:04:23] Fawn: That's true.

[00:04:24] Matt: You know?

[00:04:25] Matt: It's also when people come together.

[00:04:28] Matt: A group of people come together for whatever purpose and when you're actually like part of that purpose, you can feel a sense of belonging that's very warm and fuzzy,

[00:04:38] Fawn: or like going back to the tree, talking about external forces, forces that help the trees stay in the same position and stops it from falling.

[00:04:49] Fawn: There's some internal force that's making that happen. There's some internal force that helped me survive growing up with my family. Everybody else in the family behaved a certain way and I didn't. Right. I ended up having a completely different life than them. What Invisible force led me there.

[00:05:07] Fawn: What? Invisible Forest helped me out. What? Invisible Forest helped me out when I remember. I was in Wisconsin. I lived on the border of Wisconsin and Minnesota, and there was this one day, it was very cold. The ground was slippery, icy. The highways are, they're not like the 405

[00:05:30] Fawn: in Los Angeles where you have like an eight lane highway , right? It's, it's basically one or two lanes, that's it. And two lanes could be both directions. Mm-hmm. . So one direction has only one lane, right? So anyway, And then you get onto a highway that's also. A, a two directional lane with only two lanes, if that makes sense.

[00:05:55] Fawn: Does that make sense? Am I making sense? You make sense to me.

[00:05:58] Matt: But

[00:05:59] Fawn: it's a small road. Yes. Like it's, it looks like a country road, but it's like a highway. Right? Right. It's not, If you're from a big city, you would never consider that a highway. But it's a highway. Right. And that's where the big Semit trucks go by and big trucks go by anyway.

[00:06:15] Fawn: I was trying to turn right to get home I saw this big, huge semi drug coming and I thought, and I was young and stupid, I thought, Oh, I can just floor it, press the gas pedal really fast. Right? Absolutely. And like, just get in front of it so I can get home already. And I thought I had enough time. Right.

[00:06:37] Fawn: And I kid you not, I. I, I felt my foot press all the way down and then, and I didn't have an automatic, Wait, what's it called when you don't have, you didn't have a stick shift. I did not have a, or a transmission. Right. It was not a manual car. It was one of those whatever automatic cars that most people drive in the United States.

[00:06:58] Fawn: Right, right. All right. So I floored and all of a sudden, and the radio was on . All of a sudden the entire car stopped. It froze. It didn't even just stop because I was rolling. I was, I was, I was rolling. The car was moving forward. Mm-hmm. , But it stopped as if a giant had my car that was a toy car and just, just stopped it.

[00:07:24] Fawn: And the radio froze, like everything stopped, all the lights in the car, on the dashboard, everything went black. And at that precise second, the, the semi-truck was already passed. So had my car gone forward, I would've gotten completely smashed. Right? Flattened. So what invisible force is there, You know what I'm saying?

[00:07:55] Fawn: Yes. And it sounds unbeliev. Unless you were me being in that, in that situation. Right. You know what I mean? It sounds like I'm making it up, but I kid you not like that's what happened. All right. So I don't know there, there are forces out there, but mainly I've always thought that there has been some force that has stopped people, I think especially so only United States.

[00:08:21] Fawn: Stop them from connecting and developing friendships that are family type friendships, and I can break it down into forces that are physical, like everybody has to work and everybody's so busy and so wrapped up in all the things that they have to get done, that they're exhausted, that as much as you wanna reach out and hang out with someone, you're so tired.

[00:08:49] Fawn: And unable to make it happen. Mm-hmm. . I think that's a huge downfall in our society because we're left alone, we're left to fend for ourselves, and then you get that constant, I don't know how it is in other countries anymore because it's been a while since I've left, but I don't know what it's like in other places right now, but I can tell.

[00:09:12] Fawn: The thing that you hear over and over and over again in the American culture is pull yourself up by your bootstraps.

[00:09:21] Matt: Oh God, you hate that.

[00:09:22] Fawn: I hate that. I don't even know what that, That doesn't even make any sense. How can you pull yourself up from your shoelaces?, you know what I'm saying? But it's a saying that means, what?

[00:09:32] Fawn: What does it even mean? I, I, I assume I know what it means, which is just do it yourself. It

[00:09:36] Matt: means starting from nothing and becoming something, I suppose,

[00:09:40] Matt: all by yourself.

[00:09:41] Matt: Yes. No, I'm getting no help

[00:09:43] Fawn: from nobody. Nobody's gonna help you. You're in it by yourself. Right? And there is such great pride in doing things by yourself.

[00:09:53] Fawn: And I didn't even realize that this was hitting home in our family until a couple weeks ago. Because as much as this has been on my mind for a very long time, for like a couple decades, I've been thinking about this very same thing of why in America we need to do everything ourselves, which is ironic because why do we have so many Imports.

[00:10:15] Fawn: You know, like, we don't make things ourselves anymore. Do you know what I'm saying?

[00:10:19] Matt: Yes, I get it.

[00:10:20] Fawn: But because I've been so aware of this, I have thought that, well, for sure I'm promoting the idea that we need to work together. Everything needs to be cooperative. Even raising our kids, we made sure we had toys that were cooperative.

[00:10:35] Fawn: So when we played games, it wasn't, well, most games, not the games that Matt plays. You know, I always chose games where we all get together,

[00:10:45] Fawn: And for the common good to combine our resources and to combine our mental capacities for one common goal. So it's not one person wins, it's we win together. We create together.

[00:11:02] Matt: Right. Yeah, absolutely.

[00:11:03] Fawn: So having said all that, I was thinking of our friend Majora, who years ago when Elle was very, very little.

[00:11:11] Fawn: Elle was four years old, and Majora came to visit and after her visit with us when she was back home, she was like, I was really inspired by Elle who kept saying " i, I made it myself", and she was very emphatic about myself. I did it myself. I'm like, Oh, you know, and I, and I, and I thought that I was proud of that.

[00:11:32] Fawn: And for years, up until recently, I was like, Yeah, , you know, my, our daughter is so strong and like she does it herself. And then two weeks ago, I don't know, something whispered in my ear, an invisible force. I don't know. But it whispered in my ear, like it told me where it came from. I'm like, Oh my God. It came from me because all along, all my stories,

[00:12:01] Fawn: if you think about it, all my stories are "I did it myself". I taught myself how to ride a bike. I taught myself how to swim, which

[00:12:08] Matt: is a frightening thing when you think about it.

[00:12:10] Fawn: Yeah. As a little kid, I taught myself how to swim. . I taught myself pretty much everything because I didn't really have the kind of parents that were there to like teach me stuff like that.

[00:12:22] Fawn: Mm-hmm. or do stuff with me like that. I did it myself. I got myself to college. I did it myself. I paid for it myself. I took myself on a plane in secret to go meet with the dean of this big school to get myself in. I did it myself, and I've been telling these stories all along and I realized, Oh no, I've perpetuated this thing.

[00:12:49] Fawn: There's been this invisible force. It's been me perpetuating this idea of do it yourself. And I'm like, Oh my God. That's where Elle got it from. Two weeks ago, I just came to that conclusion, you know, isn't that a, Isn't that a bitch? Like you think you're doing good parenting and you're like, Oh my. I've been actually giving the opposite message of what I believe in.

[00:13:13] Fawn: There

[00:13:13] Matt: are points where you need to come together as a tribe, as a family, and there are points in time where you do have to figure it out yourself though.

[00:13:21] Fawn: Yeah, but I was, but

[00:13:23] Matt: that's just it. There are times for both, not exclusively. I do it myself and not exclusively. I do it as, as

[00:13:33] Matt: a group.

[00:13:34] Fawn: There is such a yin and yang with everything.

[00:13:36] Fawn: There should be a balance, right? Yes. So like we're looking at two different things. We're looking at, Matter has two forms. We have one that is particle and the other is a wave. And it's the wave that we can't necessarily see unless you develop your vision a certain way, unless you look at things a certain way.

[00:13:57] Fawn: You can't really see the waves. You can't see the invisible forces. Well, you can't see the wind. Sometimes you can. Right, Right. Sometimes you, Sometimes you can, if there's like a, some dew or, Or misty

[00:14:12] Matt: or smoke

[00:14:13] Fawn: or, Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Smoke or like you were talking about the campfire and you can see the waves of heat.

[00:14:23] Fawn: Or on a hot day when you're looking at asphalt, you can see the waves. Yep. Of heat, so sometimes you can see it, but just things that are invisible to the eye, but things that are invisible to us, that are keeping us from connecting to one another. What is that? Let's take a look at that and let's at least become aware of the possibility.

[00:14:46] Fawn: Is there something that's not said that is keeping us from each other, that is keeping us from being together. You know, we can get away from the idea of, , or the facts of we're all working so hard, our time is incredibly limited. And, and it becomes a habit. It becomes this chain, like I've described on our show before.

[00:15:12] Fawn: Like it's the baby elephant that is chained to a steak and it can only walk a certain distance that the chain won't allow it. It's chained to a steak, and as the elephant grows older, it's no longer chained to it, but it feels like it is, so it never thinks of moving away.

[00:15:34] Matt: Right, right. Well, it is still chained, but it's a chain.

[00:15:37] Matt: It can easily break as it gets older.

[00:15:39] Fawn: Yes, that's true. Because it's so powerful

[00:15:41] Matt: because it's, it, it, yeah. Elephants become so much more powerful, but they're held in place by that thought, by that

[00:15:47] Fawn: belief, by that invisible force, which is the thought, and I

[00:15:51] Matt: I, I think part of it comes from, oh yes, we get so experienced and so old and like when.

[00:16:02] Matt: When you're like six, when you're in elementary school, you know, um, it's enough to like hang out and you'll get invited to play. Or you can say to somebody else, Hey, let's go to the swings, or whatever it is, right? And then you start looking back and you're like, Eh, that's so juvenile. That's so ridiculous on some level.

[00:16:25] Matt: So you get locked into this world of you have to be cool or you have to be sophisticated, or you have to be, And so you're unwilling to break through these barriers. You're unwilling, you know, you see somebody wearing a shirt from your favorite band and, and you stop. Sometimes you will talk to 'em, sometimes you won't, but you stop and you're like, Should I talk to this person?

[00:16:45] Matt: And like you'd, it's almost like you need some kind of a go ahead from them that it's okay to like say, Hey, what's up? And most people won't offer that. . So you just don't talk to them.

[00:16:57] Fawn: Yeah, because So what force exists to not even have that? Like, why do you have that wall up?

[00:17:04] Matt: I don't wanna be spurned. I don't want somebody going, You're ridiculous.

[00:17:08] Matt: You're a clown.

[00:17:09] Fawn: Okay. This is gonna be a little bit, different, but for some reason I thought of this story, but talking about invisible forces. Are there, that they're there. We're constantly communicating with one another. You don't have to even wait for a physical signal. You know, a physical signal being like a, a glance that says, Hey, you can ask me a question.

[00:17:34] Fawn: Do you know what I'm saying? Yes. I think that much like EMFs out there, electoral magnetic fields, that, or microwaves, radio waves, they're still there. Yes. It's like you have to just tune into a. Frequency to hear it. Like you turn on a radio and you turn it to a certain, dial a certain number, 95.6, and it turns you to this kind of music.

[00:17:57] Fawn: Whereas 95.8 would be something else; completely different style of music. I just think that all these things are there and we're picking up on it, and I think as soon as we realize there is that out there, then we can pick up on it. It's always there. So case in point, this was a few years ago, I was at a park with the kids and there was a basketball court.

[00:18:21] Fawn: I don't know if I ever told you this story, Matt, but there were these big men, big tall basketball players. Okay? Big, big men. And they were playing basketball and you know, basketball is like, uh, very contact. Yes, very, very much so we. You can get hurt. Yes. So if there's a four year old, Well, no, she was like 5, 6, 6 years old.

[00:18:43] Fawn: The, the ball, the basketball bounced out of their bounds out of their court, and Elle was right there. And so when a kid sees a bouncing ball coming towards them, they're like, BALL!. Right. So she started running, She she grabbed the ball. Yeah. And she started bouncing it and running. , the basketball court while the, the big guys were still running back and forth and I was far away.

[00:19:10] Fawn: Mm-hmm. , I don't remember all the details. I think she just was about to touch the ball. She was starting to run with a ball, and so she was going to collide with these men. Ooh. And I didn't know if the men had the wherewithal to know there's a little kid mm-hmm.

[00:19:27] Fawn: that they could trample on. You know what I'm saying? Right. So in my head, I didn't say a word out loud, but I I am like, Please don't touch that ball. L l stop. I didn't say a word out. She got that message, and I'm telling you, much like the car that I just described to you, she just froze and stopped right there and let the ball go.

[00:19:57] Fawn: And it was so different. Like it was so like out of character for the situation for the kid to like be so like, yay ball to like, Oh, I'm gonna let this ball go like an electric shock. Like I'm not gonna touch. Even the men commented out loud. I could hear it from where I was. They're like, That's weird.

[00:20:22] Fawn: That kid just froze and stopped. That was weird. And they were like, That's weird. That's weird. They kept saying, That's weird. I'm like, Oh my God, it's still working. Cuz Elle and I always have had that connection, that nonverbal. , she can read my mind. Mm-hmm. and the, And vice versa.

[00:20:43] Fawn: Like I remember one day when she was a baby, back when they're a baby and they're supposed to face, the rear of the car. In the back seat, right in the car seat. In the car seat. Like when they're infants, they're supposed to face rear. And then one of us would always be in the back seat.

[00:21:01] Fawn: As the other one drove the car

[00:21:03] Matt: . Right. So Elle could see us,

[00:21:04] Fawn: so Elle could see us, but also if, if the baby cried, we'd be right there to help her and let her know that she's not alone. Right, right. I remember one day we were coming back from a photo shoot and I was in the backseat with her and she wanted something and I was just in the space of working.

[00:21:23] Fawn: I was not in the space of loving mom that I normally would've been. So I handed her the toy. I'm like, Here, right? It was rude the way I did it, and she looked at me and she started crying. Sad, sad cry. The sad cry, not cry, like, I have a dirty diaper. I'm hungry. It was like I hurt her feelings, and I'll never ever forget that because it wasn't like I said anything, It was my, it was my vibe.

[00:21:59] Fawn: It was my unloving, this that wa It was my unnatural way of being. My natural way with Elle was everything I did every time ire her, every time I touched her, every time I fed her, every time I looked at her, it was with intention and calm and love, and it did not happen at that second, in that moment in time.

[00:22:23] Fawn: But she and she felt it. Do you know what I'm saying? I. So that's another invisible force. You know what I'm saying? It was purely energetic.

[00:22:31] Matt: Right. Well, you can feel, especially like if somebody's being especially like gracious towards you, you can feel that and, and maybe you perceive, maybe you see it because they're smiling more.

[00:22:44] Matt: It's crinkles by their, who knows? But it's more about how it feels. Mm-hmm. it. And you can tell the intent. If the intent is very cold and impersonal, you can feel that.

[00:22:56] Fawn: So that's, that's pretty much what I wanted to talk about today was that. Let's all think about the, the invisible line that exists and let's try to cross it in a good way, in a loving way, and go to places we have never been to before.

[00:23:16] Fawn: Places that the world is all of ours. It could be, a new part of the earth you have not visited. It could be going for a new career. It could be that invisible line as it always told you somehow that you're not meant to do anything else but this dead end job because that's what you're supposed to do.

[00:23:38] Fawn: We get so many messages like, Don't quit your day job. . You know what I'm saying? Yes. That fear that's in place that holds us down, where we feel like we're like this massive elephant. We are so much stronger than that little bracelet that's on us, where before we couldn't break free from, but we can break free from it.

[00:24:01] Fawn: What invisible line is there that we're not crossing? What is that? And so just be aware of it. And I think that's enough for us to recognize one another and so when someone's walking past us on the sidewalk or anywhere that what the power of a smile can do, what just the feeling of compassion and love can do that is an invisible act of power, right there.

[00:24:34] Fawn: Just to feel compassion and love and to never, ever walk past someone without acknowledging them that there is another life walking past you.

[00:24:48] Fawn: Sounds

[00:24:49] Matt: good to me. Also, I would say try and go forward and in your interactions with people, if you automatically assume no malice and actually assume just that they're going to be lovely, I think your conversations can be different, and then I can actually say, Good for you, and the person will be happy about it.

[00:25:14] Fawn: Well, they have to know your heart first, so you can't go. But if you assume no malice, Well, it's not always apparent because people are wrapped up in, I know in whatever they're wrapped up in. They may not hear it or see it, so they misunderstand.

[00:25:32] Matt: I know, but I'm saying if you assume no malice, then maybe you won't misunderstand or you'll, you'll misunderstand, but you'll misunderstand that they're actually being nicer to you than they're meaning to be.

[00:25:42] Fawn: Well, I think there needs to be an introduction before that happens sometimes, most of the time, until our society gets into a more comfortable state of being. And so what I would do is acknowledge the person is there by saying hello and remark, something that's totally remarkable. Like, you know, Matt, thank you for being so, um, I don't know what the word is, Matt, but you're not, you don't get bent out of shape.

[00:26:12] Fawn: So for example, last week we went to the coffee shop and we saw this man sitting, near us and I just looked at him and I knew that he needed connection and I genuinely, totally wanted to know what his story was, right? Like he made a comment right before we sat down. I'm like, You wouldn't have made that comment if you did not wanna connect to someone.

[00:26:32] Fawn: Do you know what I'm saying? Right. Even though as soon as he made the comment, he was like, I'm busy, you know, like . But I said, Oh my goodness. Look at you. You are completely fascinating and beautiful. What is your story, man? He started giggling. Right? But what I'm saying is, Matt, most, some men would've been totally like upset.

[00:26:56] Fawn: Like it would that constitute that I was flirting with another man. I wasn't. It was just, to me, another human being. Do you know what I'm saying? I do. It was not sexual or anything like that, but that was my introduction. Like that was my, a physical, um, act. I don't know compliment someone to give them an invitation that we're open to talking with you.

[00:27:25] Fawn: Do you know what I'm saying? Yes. Or that we're acknowledging your presence. You are a remarkable human being. What is your story? What are you doing here, ? What are you doing? And he turned out to be this fascinating person, even though he was like, I'm busy, I gotta go. You. .

[00:27:44] Matt: Right, Right. And and ironically, when we, when you first asked him what he was up to, he's like, Yeah, I'm, I'm all about invisible.

[00:27:51] Matt: S h i

[00:27:52] Fawn: t. Yeah. He was a professor who taught the whole dynamics of invisible. He, yeah. He, he phrased it in a very, um, CRAs way, but it was funny. It was, it was funny, funny, funny. It was intriguing, you know, to be a professor of that like, yeah, I think I know where you're coming from. It's right up our alley , right?

[00:28:17] Fawn: And then he is like, I have to, I'm working on this paper. I can't talk anymore. I'm like, Okay, sorry, . So, but I made sure as awkward as it, Like, Hey, here's our info. I really wanna see you again. Like I wanna talk more about what you're focusing on with your studies, with, with your teaching. I wanna know more, you know?

[00:28:40] Fawn: So anyway, sometimes it's awkward, but who cares? I don't care. I don't care. I wanna collect with people. It's awkward sometimes because we're not used to it.

[00:28:52] Matt: Or we're not prepared. We're not prepared to meet anybody even though we're out in the world

[00:28:57] Matt: for goodness sake.

[00:28:58] Fawn: And the other side, if you, even if we are prepared, the other side may not be prepared.

[00:29:03] Fawn: Right. You know what I'm saying?

[00:29:04] Matt: Right. And then it's about being, trying to be a good host and, trying to make sure the other person can feel as comfortable

[00:29:10] Matt: as possible.

[00:29:11] Fawn: It's like, the old movies. The aliens come in the spaceship and they're like, We mean you no harm. I think that you need to express that to someone that you're meeting, like in some way express to them.

[00:29:25] Fawn: I mean, you no harm. I'm not trying to sell you something. I genuinely think you're interesting. . Hello. So that's it guys. Talk to you in a few days. Please reach out to us. Tell everyone you can to subscribe to our podcast and if you can leave a, a nice review for us. Thank you so much for tuning in.

[00:29:49] Matt: We'll talk to you in just a few days. Again, go to our friendly world podcast.com and reach out to us. Talk to you soon. Be well. Bye.