Jem Girls Podcast

Your favourite dumb sluts are back this week to discuss 2004’s “Seed of Chucky.” This iteration of the Child’s Play series explores what happens when a murderous doll spews his seed into the guts of both a lady doll and an actual real life lady (i.e. Jennifer Tilly)...

We're back! And so is Stella... but wherever did she put that groove of hers?

The day has arrived, dear listeners: you have finally graduated from jembryo status and risen to the esteemed rank of jemologists...

Wow! Our collective prayers have been answered! A Jem and the Holograms movie is coming out!! That is, at least, what the Jem fandom was saying in 2015 when the film was first released. Or, maybe they really weren't, because literally no one saw this trainwreck of a movie. If you can even call it that...

Well folks, if we haven’t already earned our place in hell, our conversation this week will definitely ensure that we get there… It’s hard because Ba Nee, with her never ending thirst for a father, is just so easy to make fun of. Almost every single one of her storylines (aside from the one where she has eyeball problems) has centred on her lack of having a father and how sad she is about that...

Yes, we took a bit of an end-of-winter-break (that's a thing in the eyeball-verse, just roll with it) but we're back and ready to roll into the final episodes of Jem and the Holograms!

And, we're truly getting back to the core concepts of the show, because "Riot's Hope" is FULL of daddy-related trauma...

After almost dying from an angry homicidal undertow, Minx experiences a “change of heart”, transforming from a manipulative psychotic evil bitch to a manipulative psychotic, slightly benevolent bitch. Chronic do-gooders, Jem and the Holograms, are none too impressed by Minx’s latest “stunt”; at first, they do not believe she is being genuine, thinking this is her latest tactic to fuck with the Holograms and put the “make” on affiliated homosexual, Rio...

Wait, so his name is "chicken stick"?

In this episode of Jem, we meet an old lady, Mrs. Farnsworth, with a lot of money and even more watches, who has an intense fetish for the ghost of Houdini (mama is spectral-sexual) and an obsession with all things mystical (we’ll get back to you on whether she is also obsessed with the rapper Mystikal). For reasons, the Holograms and the Stingers are eager to perform in the benefit concert (eyeroll) at Mrs. Farnsworth’s Magic Appreciation Center (or something)...

Was the music ever really alive though, really?