00:00 Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. We talk about sex and relationships with frankness that is controversial but usually in good faith and Keith my co-host is Mike but he is unavailable again. So here to pick up the slack is returning champion Alyssa welcome Back Alyssa thanks for having me back? Yeah now. Understand you have some things you want to get off your chest about our last episode but before we do that perhaps we should say where we are so we are currently in a very sexy suite in North Macedonia right and I think this is the none time this podcast has. Availed me a privilege we were checking in here and they put us in the wrong small room and while I was throwing my tantrum downstairs I mentioned that we wanted the larger room that I had booked because we needed some space because we were recording a podcast. Think the hotel owner assumed that we're recording a podcast about hotels or something it was. It was just amazing because you had the microphone in your handing you're kind of waving it about right? Yeah, so she was really worried disappointed us. Put us in this suite here. The suite is preposterous. It has 2 bathrooms and it's insane. It's very sexy. It's what I imagine like a 19 year old imagines a bachelor pad is this couch that you're sitting on its black leather. Yeah, we have. There's like red candlesticks everywhere. Yeah feathered lamp shades. It's ridiculous. So anyway, yeah, hopefully the perks keep coming and okay, why are we qualified to talk about sex and relationships. Well I guess I wouldn't say that I'm necessarily qualified I'm not licensed or certified and by any means but I am a. Young lady who has had sex and has been in relationships. So I guess listen to me None yeah or not yeah up to you. You do you for our listeners who don't know a listen I have been going out dating what are we. Boyfriend girlfriend. What are we Keith? We're know like what is a couple that is not engaged but fairly serious about each other. What the young people say going steady. Oh yeah, yeah, and we are. We are allegedly in an open relationship. Although neither one of us has. Ah, cash that check in. But right yet right? Okay, maybe that'll maybe'll have a couple later. We'll see when that happens all right make for a good episode introduction complete oh with the none time one of us sleeps with someone else. Yeah, it makes would be a good ah little interviews that segment huh. Yeah, you should help me do that. Just so that we can have some good content.
00:27 Because it's a visual representation of ownership or dominance over the woman and I get why this person ah well okay so this person is is a woman. She's like why do men love coming on their partner's face. No actually sorry it's a man. He's like even I do but I've never understood the exact exact reason I think yeah I think it's because it makes you feel alpha or dominance and that's fine I just don't. With so many things with sex these things where like the man is positioned as the alpha and the woman is positioned as the extreme submissive beta I don't understand why so many women are liking that kind of thing so I have the same confusion about women who claim they love to give blowjobs. Have this confusion about women who are like oh I just love it when it comes on my face right? It's like I don't I think it's signaling something obviously negative about the way the man feels about the woman and in the best possible scenario. It's only in the bedroom but come on. It. It seems unlikely that that's not leaking into other parts of their thought pattern and so I don't understand why people are so comfortable with it women are so comfortable with with I understand why men want it. They're like this is awesome. Look what I've done look what I look what I've what look what I made look at this mask look at this person who subjugated to me look at. Look at how im imposing myself on them I can understand that being hot I don't think it's that hot because I often care deeply for the person that I'm sleeping with and and I you know like it's just strange to do this thing that demeans them. And then be like and then cordon that off and say oh this is only in the bedroom I really care about how your career is going and I want to think your opinions are just as important as mine except in the bedroom. Yeah I want to like you know tie you down have you eat my ass. And then I'm going to come on your face and walk away like it's I think it's it's more It's still. It's more nuanced than that though and I I is more to and I in extremely character charactericatureized case here. No I understand it and it's the none perspective generally where my world view on this. My confusion about this stuff. No I can understand your perspective but on it and I think in my own so for my own personal interest in it. Um for me and like I said my turn on is my partner's turn on right? If it's something my partner's into I'm not and it's not a strong new for me. Yes, a None this is something this something Mike always says like this you enjoy going down on your part.
00:38 So poorly written. But yeah, it's a lot of things wrong here but go on so the person person once says have you tried talking to him about it and telling him how much you want it? I think that's probably the first best answer. But I think it is also the case that some men are pretty averse to. Going down on their partner I have a friend who hasn't gone down on a woman since his early 20 s he's in his forty s now really yeah, but he's introspect on why he doesn't like it right? I think he's just like that's gross I don't know I don't think he I mean he's been married for a while I think he. His opinion I haven't talked to him about it in at least 10 years but I think his opinion is something like why should I do that? Oh yeah, ouch yeah, well, he's not American so he has like somewhat macho. Oh he says? um, but he's like that. It's kind of this like cultural machimo thing like I don't I don't need to do that. Okay, um, well I guess he found his match if he's married I mean some women don't like being like don't like oral sex either. She's also from the same country. So okay, she may not feel empowered to. I'll feel on about. Yeah anyway, look the point is there are lots of men who don't want to go down on women just like there are lots of women who don't want to go down. Okay, right? Okay, so no I So I hear it and I think there's a lot of other factors here um has she had a conversation with him about why. He doesn't like it because it could be a myriad of things. It could be that he's Nervous. He doesn't know what to do? Um, he could yeah like I mean that he could be nervous about that. He could think that it's not something that she really likes you know and so there are there are there's like some communication things that you can do with that where say she can. Tell him like oh my gosh like it's just amazing Every time you do like I love it and you know just kind of give like you know like positive affirmations back at him where he's just like oh yeah, like this is a good Thing. You know, think that that's None tear affirmations something like moaning and. Sexy talk and telling him to look harder or look lighter or you know demonstrably being enthusiastic about what you're receiving. You know oh that's it baby? Whatever Ah I think stroking his ego. Yeah is that's kind like a lot of men are afraid that they're not. Able to you know, give the woman what she wants and lots of women are pretty noncommunicative when you're down there and so if if you know if they're not orgasming reliably when you go down on them and they're not really giving you feedback I can imagine eventually sort of giving up right? And that's why I I.