Speaker 1: Confession, I can't take better girl. Arms Speaker got a
Speaker 1: text to seven eighty five nine two that says, a
Speaker 1: big hole has appeared in our local park and nobody
Speaker 1: knows how it got there, but it's me. I go
Speaker 1: out every night after dark and dig it a little deeper.
Speaker 1: I always just figures are from dogs or something. Probably
Speaker 1: it's some guy going out to the bark and digging
Speaker 1: it up the city. I'm glad all that time and
Speaker 1: efforts being spent on a good cause. I guess we
Speaker 1: all have our quirky moments in our life, our metaphorical
Speaker 1: holes that we've dug, and we don't judge here on
Speaker 1: this show. We love your holes the way that they're
Speaker 1: meant to be loved, and well, so we promised to
Speaker 1: keep your whole anonymous too. That's why Evan is on
Speaker 1: the phone. Evan is is Alias, of course, but he
Speaker 1: wants to share something with us, possibly about his hole. Evan,
Speaker 1: welcome to the show. Hello, Hi, Do you feel uncomfortable
Speaker 1: because of the intro or because of what you're going
Speaker 1: to tell us? I mean a little bit of balls, honestly,
Speaker 1: all right, I feel like you're in the right head
Speaker 1: space now. Evan because the voice changer is on. You
Speaker 1: are now the mass speaker. Whenever you're ready, let's hear
Speaker 1: your confession. So a few years ago, I was on
Speaker 1: a company retreat with about twenty five thirty employees, all
Speaker 1: of us together. Is that something you enjoy? No, No,
Speaker 1: it's one of the most boring things in the world.
Speaker 1: Like some of those small tech companies they go party,
Speaker 1: but then there's other ones that are lay. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I wish I could say we're one of those cool ones,
Speaker 1: but it ends up being my boss talking NonStop for
Speaker 1: like seven eight hours. Oh my god. Yeah, because you
Speaker 1: don't get enough of that during the week, you need
Speaker 1: to make it a twenty four hour experience. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: this is what's even worse too, is like, not only
Speaker 1: are we like in these meetings all day long, daring,
Speaker 1: have these power points, but then because the retreat, we're
Speaker 1: all like together and we all have to go to dinner.
Speaker 1: It's just like more of my boss with the dumb
Speaker 1: story my mind is dumb for three days. Oh no,
Speaker 1: I'm just thinking of you having a fake laugh at
Speaker 1: all your boss's terrible dad jokes. I could barely make
Speaker 1: it through one fifteen minute meeting let att of three
Speaker 1: third days of it. So that's how long these retreats
Speaker 1: used to last. Used to last. Yes, but one trip
Speaker 1: that we went on a few years back, after night one,
Speaker 1: me and four other employees, we're back in the hotel
Speaker 1: in my room and we're just saying, we cannot survive
Speaker 1: another two days of this. Well, we got to do something.
Speaker 1: We gotta get out. We're gonna lose our minds or
Speaker 1: you know. Yeah, we're like trying to come up with
Speaker 1: excuse like, oh, like what if one of us get sick,
Speaker 1: but or like we're like a family emergency, but we
Speaker 1: can't all have family emergencies that look a little suspicious.
Speaker 1: Did you all hit a bad shrimp cocktail at the
Speaker 1: same time? Maybe? Well, what in a happening was there
Speaker 1: were all these free lemonade pictures out there during a
Speaker 1: meeting all day long. So the next morning I found
Speaker 1: the guy down the kitchen. He was who's the one
Speaker 1: who making all the lemonades in the morning, and said
Speaker 1: I would pay him a hundred bucks to add some
Speaker 1: fun ingredients. What vodka? I feel like it's stronger than
Speaker 1: I promised. No one was harmed. So the morning starts
Speaker 1: at nine am and by ten thirty it was just
Speaker 1: completely off the rails. Oh my god. So people aren't sober,
Speaker 1: they're not in their correct state of minds. But some
Speaker 1: people were just in great food all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: and they were bursting out into laughter. And my boss
Speaker 1: best of all, he like started getting like sweaty, and
Speaker 1: he just like first he took his neck tie off,
Speaker 1: and then he was just feeling so strange that he
Speaker 1: started using his necktie like a cow boy. Laugh though,
Speaker 1: and like trying to laugh though. Other employees are just
Speaker 1: like weren't sitting still. No one is sober enough to
Speaker 1: understand that something's happened to the lemonade. You know, I
Speaker 1: think the meetings are so boring that everyone was just
Speaker 1: happy to be like enjoying the morning. For one, this
Speaker 1: is the best presentation I think we've ever had. Guys,
Speaker 1: I think I figured it out. What I think you
Speaker 1: put a little splendor in there that makes you feel good,
Speaker 1: taste great fun, and greedy. Everybody a little bit of that.
Speaker 1: As for team I will say this too, there was
Speaker 1: a bit of a crashing point, you know when when
Speaker 1: when this kind of mood strikes. Yeah, it was a
Speaker 1: bit of a colmdown what happened. Well, at some point,
Speaker 1: my boss, he's having a great time and then suddenly
Speaker 1: the switch happened and he just starts crying. Oh and
Speaker 1: he confesses to everybody in the office that the revenue
Speaker 1: was not as good as they projected for that quarter.
Speaker 1: You know, he just like starts filling his guts a
Speaker 1: little pimm. You know, I kind of felt bad, but
Speaker 1: you know, it actually kind of like brought us together
Speaker 1: a little bit, oh some heartfelt bonding. So no one
Speaker 1: got in trouble for this. No one really knew what
Speaker 1: was happening, So I feel a little like it's my
Speaker 1: secret a little bit. Would they not know after like
Speaker 1: the next day when they're remembering back and like things
Speaker 1: are hazy. I have a super high tolerance too. I
Speaker 1: bet I'd be only one looking around like what's going on?
Speaker 1: Never came down permanently having a great time for the
Speaker 1: rest of their life. We actually, a couple hours later,
Speaker 1: at one o'clock, the we just the boss decided to
Speaker 1: cancel the rest of the trip, and everyone in the
Speaker 1: room just started applotting. And we haven't had one of
Speaker 1: those rich in that in my conference center ever since.
Speaker 1: Hurt you solve a problem. Everyone was happy and there
Speaker 1: was no consequence. Yeah. I wouldn't encourage this to other people.
Speaker 1: This is highly illegal. Next time Brooke is crying in
Speaker 1: the middle of the studio, I'm gonna that's my own choice.
Speaker 1: The text into seven eight, five nine two. If you
Speaker 1: have a confession you've been holding on too, we can
Speaker 1: mask your voice hydro identity and make you the next
Speaker 1: mass speaker. Phone tasks coming up next Brooke and Jeffrey
Speaker 1: in the morning.