Speaker 1: This is Teddy Teapot. Hi, guys, welcome back. I um
Speaker 1: did a little Instagram poll where I asked everybody what
Speaker 1: they want to hear the most, okay from me, and
Speaker 1: the number one topic was they wanted to hear about IBS, infertility, miscarriages,
Speaker 1: all that kind of stuff. Because I have shared a
Speaker 1: little bit about my story, you know, through Instagram and
Speaker 1: through the show that I'm on, and so that's a
Speaker 1: topic that everybody really wanted me to dig into. I
Speaker 1: can't wait to hear your story. Well, I'm gonna try
Speaker 1: not to get super emotional about it, but I figured
Speaker 1: if we start with my story, then we can go
Speaker 1: into all the different avenues and kind of dig into
Speaker 1: the listeners questions. And then also we're gonna have some
Speaker 1: specialists on and then some other women that have gone
Speaker 1: through different things than I have and you know, really
Speaker 1: learn about everything. UM. So, just backstory in regards to me,
Speaker 1: I had been on the pill since I was about
Speaker 1: a teenager, you know, like on the pill, and then
Speaker 1: when my husband and I got engaged, I went off
Speaker 1: the pill. Not because I was trying immediately to get pregnant,
Speaker 1: but we were like all right by the time I
Speaker 1: get married, Um, I'm gonna want to start trying, and
Speaker 1: we had we had talked about that, so we but
Speaker 1: we also weren't not trying, right. But I never even
Speaker 1: was really taught that there was like a time that
Speaker 1: you ovulated and that's when you got pregnant. Like I
Speaker 1: was completely glueless. I was like, you know, because when
Speaker 1: you're younger, you're just taught don't have sex because you
Speaker 1: get pregnant, right, So I didn't realize there were certain days.
Speaker 1: So I mean, we weren't following any kind of method.
Speaker 1: We were just not not trying. And then after we
Speaker 1: got married, we were trying and trying and trying, and
Speaker 1: we learned when we when we needed to try three
Speaker 1: day window, you know. We we tried to take all
Speaker 1: the sex appeal out of it. You know, I'm like
Speaker 1: checking my temperature, doing all the things, and I'm not
Speaker 1: getting pregnant. And at first it's like it's fun and
Speaker 1: we're laughing about it and blah blah blah. And then
Speaker 1: after a while, I just started putting all this pressure
Speaker 1: on myself. I'm like, I'm still not getting pregnant, and
Speaker 1: the process started becoming like a job, like we're checking
Speaker 1: the thing that I'm checking this, and I'm checking that.
Speaker 1: I'm checking to make sure I'm ovulating. Now I'm saying
Speaker 1: if I'm getting you know, I skipped a period, blah
Speaker 1: blah blah, nothing's really happening. So I end up going
Speaker 1: to the doctor and I'm like, listen, you know, here
Speaker 1: we are. We're over six months into this, but really
Speaker 1: it's been over a year and a half into this
Speaker 1: because I haven't not been trying. And he's like, all right,
Speaker 1: well we'll start you on something called clomad. And I
Speaker 1: call this the crazy pills. Oh my god, Like I
Speaker 1: can't even tell you how crazy clomad made me. Apparently
Speaker 1: what it does is, and I'm not a doctor, but
Speaker 1: it gives you more eggs or something like that helps
Speaker 1: you release so it's all estrogen, as I think. So
Speaker 1: I don't even really know. We're gonna have to task
Speaker 1: a professional what exactly cloona it is. But I became
Speaker 1: one of those people. Like I was driving home from work.
Speaker 1: I passed Taco Bell, Okay, fine, I had to do
Speaker 1: a U turn and I couldn't, and so I called
Speaker 1: my husband hysterically crying, just so I passed it and
Speaker 1: then I couldn't do the U turn and he's like, babe,
Speaker 1: everything's good, like you're alive, Like I had no. I
Speaker 1: was having these outbursts all of the time. And so
Speaker 1: that was me on clomad for six months. Welcome to
Speaker 1: new married life, and you know, I was a disaster. Um.
Speaker 1: So that didn't work and um. Then I went back
Speaker 1: to the doctor. I'm like, listen, like, you're gonna have
Speaker 1: to put me in a straight jacket soon because I'm
Speaker 1: not good on this medication. And he's like, I think
Speaker 1: you need to go to our fertility specialists. He's like,
Speaker 1: there's nothing showing up that is wrong with you, but
Speaker 1: you're just not getting pregnant. So then I went to
Speaker 1: the fertility doctor and with my daughter Slate. He was like,
Speaker 1: all right, let's just try to We're gonna keep you
Speaker 1: on the clod and then we're gonna do a round
Speaker 1: of insimination. That works for most people. Um yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't know if he said that works for most people,
Speaker 1: but he said, let's try an insimination first, which they
Speaker 1: don't really give you all the information. When you're in there,
Speaker 1: you're like, okay, great, shouldn't be anything. So we schedule
Speaker 1: our date and when he goes into you know, Edwin
Speaker 1: has to like take care of his business. It takes forever.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, listen, buddy, I know how long this
Speaker 1: normally takes. Like let's get with the program. Here, like
Speaker 1: waiting for him, I'm ready to get insiminated. And he
Speaker 1: comes out and he's like his face is like white
Speaker 1: and he's like that's brutal in there. I'm like, what's
Speaker 1: the problem. And he's like, they have an updated the
Speaker 1: Born since the eighties and I'm like what And he
Speaker 1: is a half breaking mess like he is like I
Speaker 1: don't know that I can do that again. And I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: he's like, I mean that was brutal. He's like you're
Speaker 1: on this like crazy. There's like a couch option. It's
Speaker 1: not a good scene. But anyway, with Slate, I actually
Speaker 1: got pregnant the first time being inseminated, which was amazing,
Speaker 1: Like we were like, yeah, everything's great. Um. Then I
Speaker 1: had a very difficult pregnancy, I think because so many
Speaker 1: years of being like riding horses and doing all of that.
Speaker 1: Then I had to stop riding and I kept spotting
Speaker 1: throughout my pregnancy. So they repeatedly were putting me on
Speaker 1: bed rest, so my entire pregnancy would be Okay, you
Speaker 1: can go back to work. I couldn't ride, but I
Speaker 1: could still teach, and then I would go back on
Speaker 1: bed rest. So like I was already developing almost like
Speaker 1: a level of depression because my life was changing in
Speaker 1: a in a way that I didn't understand. Plus, for
Speaker 1: your first child, you really don't have any idea what's
Speaker 1: about to happen. Um. So I I had Slate. She
Speaker 1: was a healthy, beautiful baby girl, you know, thank you God,
Speaker 1: amazing um. And then after I had Slate, I got postpartum,
Speaker 1: and I remember being so embarrassed and ashamed. And I
Speaker 1: didn't know that that happened to people. And like there
Speaker 1: were moments where like I would search on the internet
Speaker 1: like postpartum depression, and I didn't have. I had heard
Speaker 1: about people getting postpartum and it was like they wanted
Speaker 1: to hurt their baby. I didn't have that. I just
Speaker 1: felt so down Edwin would leave for work and I
Speaker 1: would sob you know, but I didn't want to tell
Speaker 1: him that because you don't want to tell your husband.
Speaker 1: I don't know I'm gonna make it through this day,
Speaker 1: you know, and luckily, like with time, it kind of
Speaker 1: it lifted. And you know, I was so happy that
Speaker 1: that happened. But then we started trying again to have
Speaker 1: another baby, and I just it wasn't happening, went through
Speaker 1: all the steps again and we ended up needing to
Speaker 1: do IVF. And here's where, like, it just was unbelievably
Speaker 1: hard for me, because I don't know if everybody's like this,
Speaker 1: I mean most people, those people probably aren't, but like
Speaker 1: I don't like to see. I don't like when people
Speaker 1: can see me breaking down, right, So I hit it
Speaker 1: from everybody how hard it was every single time. So
Speaker 1: I would go in, I would have to harvest my eggs,
Speaker 1: then they would mix it with Edwin's and then we
Speaker 1: would do um pgs, which is the testing to make
Speaker 1: sure that you have healthy babies. And then you know,
Speaker 1: each time I would probably have one or two. Then
Speaker 1: they would put, you know, implant. I don't know if
Speaker 1: the words implant they would yeah, they would implant the baby.
Speaker 1: And then multiple times, like it was just repeated, you know,
Speaker 1: like this one didn't take it. All your numbers are, Oh,
Speaker 1: we don't know what's going to happen here. Um you
Speaker 1: now you have a killer cell, which I had never
Speaker 1: heard of before. So then they started me on blood
Speaker 1: thinners and steroids and it just was like just NonStop,
Speaker 1: and you know, you just get really stuck inside of
Speaker 1: yourself and and I know I'm gonna get heat for this,
Speaker 1: but I all I could keep thinking was what is
Speaker 1: wrong with me? Like what am I doing? Why is
Speaker 1: my body killing these babies? Like what is happening? And
Speaker 1: then like the final straw was the I was. I
Speaker 1: went in. We did another round and at this point,
Speaker 1: like everyone in my life was like this, this is
Speaker 1: getting a little it's getting a little brutal here. And
Speaker 1: I went in and I got pregnant, and it was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: this is great. And they didn't say, like, your numbers
Speaker 1: are still really low, You're still like in a danger zone.
Speaker 1: We know, we knew it was a boy because of
Speaker 1: the testing, and UM we named him UM like we
Speaker 1: were ready. And then I had a miscarriage and I
Speaker 1: remember being like what am I going to do and
Speaker 1: almost wanting to hide it from everybody in my life
Speaker 1: because I was like, they're not going to let me
Speaker 1: do this again. And like I remember, I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, I just really thought it was gonna work,
Speaker 1: and I was so excited, and I just remember feeling
Speaker 1: so broken, and I remember a call. I had a
Speaker 1: conversation with my dad and Edwyn at the same time,
Speaker 1: and they were like, you're not doing it again. You're
Speaker 1: actually going to take a break, And I said, if
Speaker 1: I can talk to the doctor and he will let
Speaker 1: me do it one more time, you guys, please just
Speaker 1: let me do it one more time, because I just
Speaker 1: I'm not I just can't imagine not trying again. I
Speaker 1: promise I can do it. I can do it. And
Speaker 1: it became this like almost obsession that I don't know
Speaker 1: why it like became this way. So then I became
Speaker 1: a totally different person, Like I was like, I am
Speaker 1: not sure one person that this is hard. I am
Speaker 1: done being upset about it because I can't let them
Speaker 1: know and pull it away. So I called my doctor
Speaker 1: with my husband on, and he was like, you know,
Speaker 1: Dr Mars. So for those of you asking who my
Speaker 1: doctor was, it was Dr Mars. I said, will you
Speaker 1: please let me do one more round? And he's like, Teddy,
Speaker 1: I don't think you're emotionally in the place to do it.
Speaker 1: And I said, please, I'm begging you one more round
Speaker 1: and then I promise, I'll take a year off, just
Speaker 1: let me do it, and he was like, I, okay,
Speaker 1: you can do one more round. And we went in
Speaker 1: and you know, everybody's mind frame was just different this time,
Speaker 1: and we went in kind of sad, like we no
Speaker 1: longer had that like life in us, like where you
Speaker 1: know this is going to happen, and uh, I it
Speaker 1: was before Christmas, so I would have found out on
Speaker 1: Christmas Day. And I didn't even tell anybody those details.
Speaker 1: I just went home for Christmas, I had the implantation.
Speaker 1: I went home for Christmas. I lived Christmas like I
Speaker 1: wasn't pregnant, like life was nothing. And I came back
Speaker 1: and I was pregnant like I was pregnant, and everything
Speaker 1: felt really, you know great, But then they're like, but
Speaker 1: your numbers are still low. So for the first you know,
Speaker 1: it was I think ten weeks, you're just kind of waiting,
Speaker 1: and then it just was that waiting game. But luckily
Speaker 1: Crews stuck and you know, he was my amazing baby boy.
Speaker 1: But then what ended up happening next to us, which
Speaker 1: I don't know that a lot of people talk about,
Speaker 1: which is actually the hardest part that we went through
Speaker 1: in regards to this whole process is when Cruz was born.
Speaker 1: So you know, we already had all of like these
Speaker 1: mixed feelings because we had to do IVF. We chose
Speaker 1: a boy. We knew, you know, all of these things
Speaker 1: that go through your mind that they shouldn't you. We
Speaker 1: just wanted a healthy baby. But like you start blaming yourself. Um,
Speaker 1: we when I was going into labor, was really long labor,
Speaker 1: and when crews finally came out, the nurse put him
Speaker 1: on my chest and I said, um, something something's wrong
Speaker 1: with him. I'm sorry, something's wrong with him. So they
Speaker 1: immediately because they saw on my record that I had
Speaker 1: postpartum was slate, they saw something was wrong with me,
Speaker 1: and they weren't really believing that something was wrong with him.
Speaker 1: And finally a nurse like, they're like, he's fine, teddy.
Speaker 1: Some kids just take a little bit longer to cry.
Speaker 1: You shouldn't have to worry about it, and it's gonna
Speaker 1: be okay. And I started screaming like it's not okay.
Speaker 1: He's not okay. And finally the nurse was like, you
Speaker 1: know what, he's not okay, like, and they called the
Speaker 1: code and the hunter. You know, Cedars is a learning hospital,
Speaker 1: so it's hundreds of doctors coming in and you know,
Speaker 1: like learning, you know whatever, they take him away from
Speaker 1: from us. He's on life support. We don't know anything.
Speaker 1: They medicate me, so I like knock out. I wake
Speaker 1: up and my husband is just sitting in the corner
Speaker 1: and like a pile of mush, like just like crying.
Speaker 1: He's like, I don't know if Cruises alive. I haven't
Speaker 1: heard from anyone. No one's told me anything. I'm just
Speaker 1: sitting here. And he's like, now I'm blaming myself because
Speaker 1: we did this and we created this bit. You know,
Speaker 1: like all of these things that are going through your mind,
Speaker 1: they are completely out of your control. And I called
Speaker 1: up to the to the nick you and I said, Hi,
Speaker 1: I'm Cruises Mom, and it's so great. You guys want
Speaker 1: to come up. Oh my god, you guys want to
Speaker 1: come up. He's still on. He's still on, you know,
Speaker 1: the breathing machine and everything like that, but you guys
Speaker 1: can't hold him, but you can see him. And um,
Speaker 1: you know, once we saw him, all of those those
Speaker 1: feelings went away. But that time where you're just really
Speaker 1: trying to figure out if your baby's okay, you go
Speaker 1: to every negative place in the world. And you know,
Speaker 1: we ended up finding out that they don't exactly know
Speaker 1: why he wasn't breathing when he was born, but he
Speaker 1: does have a heart condition, but something that can be managed,
Speaker 1: so in the end, it's all very positive. But it
Speaker 1: became a reason why, I mean, why we never thought
Speaker 1: we'd have another baby again. And that's why I mean,
Speaker 1: for those of you who do or don't know, I
Speaker 1: am nineteen weeks pregnant right now and it happened naturally,
Speaker 1: and I had no idea, and I didn't even know
Speaker 1: I was pregnant till I was nine weeks pregnant. Um,
Speaker 1: we weren't trying, you know, It's just how life works.
Speaker 1: So I know all of the ups and downs. I
Speaker 1: know so many of you guys that have struggled with
Speaker 1: the same things I have. Once I started opening up
Speaker 1: and telling people I had a miscarriage, or this happened,
Speaker 1: or this happened, or I had the killer cell or
Speaker 1: the me too, me too, me too, you know, and
Speaker 1: we don't talk about things until somebody else is going
Speaker 1: through them. And I think it's so important to know
Speaker 1: you're not alone. But um, I don't even know how
Speaker 1: to transition from. And I hope it's okay that I'm
Speaker 1: asking emotionally, how do you feel being pregnant? Are you nervous? Well,
Speaker 1: that's what everybody has been asking me, because I was
Speaker 1: so nervous the last couple of times. Also, I was
Speaker 1: in a completely different stage in my life because even
Speaker 1: with CRUs I was on bed rest multiple times as well.
Speaker 1: And going into this pregnancy, I'm able to be active because,
Speaker 1: like one, I didn't know for eight weeks, so I
Speaker 1: was active all before. You know, they say what the
Speaker 1: doctor says, as long as you start your pregnancy active,
Speaker 1: you can continue whatever you were doing prior. So I
Speaker 1: am able to eat properly, like to nourish the baby.
Speaker 1: I'm in a place where I'm taking care of myself.
Speaker 1: I'm able to move every day. I'm still able to
Speaker 1: work my jobs, change, you know, all of those things.
Speaker 1: And to be honest, I'm the least stressed about this
Speaker 1: baby than I have I was with the others. And
Speaker 1: I think it's solely because I'm like, I've done the
Speaker 1: I've done it the other way right, and I just
Speaker 1: can't do it that way again. And you don't have
Speaker 1: all of those prescriptions in your body, which so this
Speaker 1: probably feels really different. Yeah, Everyone's like, how do you
Speaker 1: not know you were pregnant? I'm like, well, when I
Speaker 1: was pregnant on the others, I was either on the
Speaker 1: clomad or the steroids or the blood thunders are, Like,
Speaker 1: I was on so much medication that I wasn't feeling
Speaker 1: the regular pregnancy symptoms. So even in those first you know,
Speaker 1: eight or nine weeks when I didn't know it was pregnant,
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm tired. But who isn't tired When
Speaker 1: you have kids and you work and you're filming a
Speaker 1: TV you know, whatever it is, you're tired. Yeah. So
Speaker 1: I mean I really feel like, I'm like, we're gonna
Speaker 1: be okay. Um, But it's definitely a different feeling that
Speaker 1: I've ever had being pregnant. So yeah, I'm just like,
Speaker 1: you know, but we were. I mean, I took nine
Speaker 1: home pregnancy tests before I went to the doctor with
Speaker 1: the phone. Wait, I just want did you postmate the
Speaker 1: practice pregnancy test to the house. Where did you go
Speaker 1: to go? To know? Like I like walk of ship,
Speaker 1: like what I went twice to go and then the
Speaker 1: third time, I asked my sistem like, can you figure
Speaker 1: me up from pregnancy tests? I just don't know that
Speaker 1: I can handle the CBS lady again my ship is
Speaker 1: I'm really judging, but I still have them all just
Speaker 1: in case I love it. Oh my gosh. So yeah,
Speaker 1: that's kind of my my story, and I I feel
Speaker 1: like when I whenever I talk about it, yes, there's
Speaker 1: people that are gonna I'm not going to say everything right,
Speaker 1: I'm going to say something that may end up offending
Speaker 1: somebody or that. But I have to be able to
Speaker 1: share my story and how I felt because there are
Speaker 1: people that are going through the same exact thing that
Speaker 1: feel really alone that I don't feel like they can
Speaker 1: open up because for whatever reason, we put this pressure
Speaker 1: on ourselves. Forever reason we don't. It's weird. You feel
Speaker 1: like if you are weak or you break down, and
Speaker 1: it's not even weak, it's just having emotions that they're
Speaker 1: going to tell you have to stop right, and it's
Speaker 1: I mean, that's brutal. When someone says, you know you're
Speaker 1: done just enough, you need time, your time to heal,
Speaker 1: and can you still It's like you took us right
Speaker 1: back there. And I think you went back there. I
Speaker 1: could feel the panic when you were like, please, Dad, please, Edwin,
Speaker 1: let me do it one more time. Yeah, like and
Speaker 1: that all these other people had sort of they want
Speaker 1: to have your best interest, but it's almost like a
Speaker 1: power over you. And that would be so because they're like,
Speaker 1: we want you to we want you to feel better,
Speaker 1: we want you to not have this hanging over you.
Speaker 1: But like in my mind I know best, like I
Speaker 1: know that like this is going to happen this time.
Speaker 1: I don't even know why I thought that. I think
Speaker 1: I was just so desperate that I was like, if
Speaker 1: I say it, and then I'm just because I promise myself.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm gonna be chill, I'm gonna go home,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be fine at Christmas. I'm not gonna be
Speaker 1: bugging out. I'm not gonna be testing. I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: have a mental break at Christmas Eve, like I'm gonna
Speaker 1: And I just kind of told myself that. And then
Speaker 1: when I came back and they were like, you're you're pregnant,
Speaker 1: I was like, but then you know they still then
Speaker 1: every every day you go in to test your levels
Speaker 1: when you had repeated issues, So then it's like that
Speaker 1: mind game every single day. It only and you're like,
Speaker 1: but I was like, it's okay, that's the terrible number.
Speaker 1: You know, you just need to start like tricking yourself
Speaker 1: to try, you know, to do that. But it's I know,
Speaker 1: there are just so many people out there, and there's
Speaker 1: so many husbands also that have no idea what to
Speaker 1: do when their wife is in the state. So, um,
Speaker 1: I know we're having some different guests in and I
Speaker 1: also know that we have a ton of questions to
Speaker 1: get through, and we're kind of writing down questions as
Speaker 1: they come for the doctor because I still don't know
Speaker 1: what a killer cell is. I don't really either, because
Speaker 1: I the one thing my doctor did say is like,
Speaker 1: don't go on web md. Do you do? You're not
Speaker 1: a doctor, So quit trying to diagnose yourself over my diagnosis,
Speaker 1: because then you know, you become really crazy. Well, I
Speaker 1: wonder our killer cells common and I don't know. My
Speaker 1: guess is what happens. What I was told, but also
Speaker 1: remember I was told not in the best state, was
Speaker 1: that your body thinks that your baby is like a
Speaker 1: foreign object and it goes to like get rid of it.
Speaker 1: So that's why you need the blood thinners and the steroids.
Speaker 1: So but I mean there's been so many questions. We
Speaker 1: also need to find out about pcos A lot of
Speaker 1: people ask me about that. And then there's also just
Speaker 1: people that have a lot of questions about freezing their eggs,
Speaker 1: um when they're even when they're not ready to have
Speaker 1: a baby. So what do you do after when you
Speaker 1: don't want to use the rest of them? You have
Speaker 1: to that you have to save them like in the
Speaker 1: or you have to donate or I mean some people
Speaker 1: I think even sell. There's so many different things that
Speaker 1: like we don't even know. Yeah, I have all kinds
Speaker 1: of questions, I know, so do I. So with that,
Speaker 1: should we take a little break and then um, when
Speaker 1: we come back, I think Sadie Murray is going to
Speaker 1: come in and talk to us about her journey. Hey,
Speaker 1: so we're back with Teddy, t Pod and Jen and
Speaker 1: I are going to ask Sadie some questions because she
Speaker 1: just recently froze her eggs. So give us the deeds.
Speaker 1: What lad you to want to start freezing your eggs?
Speaker 1: Your age, give us, give us everything. So I had
Speaker 1: just um ended a relationship, you know, when I was
Speaker 1: I was I dated this guy who I thought I
Speaker 1: was going to marry, and I was thirty four when
Speaker 1: we broke up and he told me, actually, I don't
Speaker 1: think I ever want to have a family, and I
Speaker 1: felt like, are you kidding me? Like I just wasted
Speaker 1: this time with you, and it blew my mind. But
Speaker 1: it was also kind of like the fire that I
Speaker 1: needed under my ass to take control of the situation.
Speaker 1: And so I met with a doctor um in Newport
Speaker 1: Beach and I got all the info. Then I chickened out,
Speaker 1: like I made my appointment. Then I was like, no,
Speaker 1: I've got time, only thirty four. And then I went
Speaker 1: back in and he was like no, literally, like time
Speaker 1: is not on your side, like it's not like like yeah,
Speaker 1: and he was like, whether you do it with me
Speaker 1: or someone else, like you just need to know the facts,
Speaker 1: because I kind of felt like, and this is you
Speaker 1: at thirty four, Yeah, so this is I'm thirty six now, Okay.
Speaker 1: So I meet with him and he's he kind of
Speaker 1: I mean, I got over the emotional aspect of it,
Speaker 1: like this isn't the way I planned it, this isn't
Speaker 1: what I wanted necessarily, but I wanted to empower myself. Right.
Speaker 1: So then finally I turned thirty five and I'm like,
Speaker 1: all right, it's a d day. Here we go, get
Speaker 1: this over with. And I thought, you know what, and
Speaker 1: if I can do this, if I'm gonna be a mom,
Speaker 1: you have to be able to handle anything, so why
Speaker 1: not show it off now kind of a thing? Right? So, yeah,
Speaker 1: I did it. I So some of the listeners questions are,
Speaker 1: if you're going in solely to freeze your eggs, how
Speaker 1: much does it cost? Mine was about twelve thousand dollars
Speaker 1: twelve thousand, and like for your did you do it
Speaker 1: one time or multiple? I've only done it once because
Speaker 1: I got a nice amount of eggs the first, you
Speaker 1: know when I did it, But I have I have
Speaker 1: a couple of girlfriends that you know have done it
Speaker 1: twice three times. I mean, you do it as many
Speaker 1: times as you need to. And then what is the like,
Speaker 1: for lack of a better word, the storage, Like, what
Speaker 1: is the right monthly for that? I think mine is
Speaker 1: it's maybe five hundred a year, So it's not horrible.
Speaker 1: I mean, isn't that where the storage like a storage?
Speaker 1: I was thinking about this seriously. I was thinking about
Speaker 1: this the other day I was like, how are my
Speaker 1: eggs doing? I'm to st visit them. I would like
Speaker 1: to someday. Yeah, I have photos of them on my phone.
Speaker 1: It was so funny, you guys, I'm in a group
Speaker 1: text with my girlfriends from college. We're all in the
Speaker 1: same sorority and all of them are married and have
Speaker 1: you know, at least one kid. My best friend just
Speaker 1: had her third and we're all the same age. And
Speaker 1: my friends like, show me pictures if your new babies.
Speaker 1: And I'm on this group text and I'm like, are
Speaker 1: you serious? Like that's so annoying. So they're all like
Speaker 1: cute photos of like you know them, like riding bikes
Speaker 1: and stuff like that. And so I sent the actual
Speaker 1: pictures of the eggs that I got from my doctor
Speaker 1: and I was like, here are my little popsicles. So
Speaker 1: when now the you've done that, what are kind of
Speaker 1: your next thoughts? Like? Where where's your headspace? Now? I
Speaker 1: feel like, you know, big dick energy. Yeah, I feel
Speaker 1: like I have that now like when I'm now when
Speaker 1: I'm dating, like, I don't feel like I have to
Speaker 1: settle because you know, I want to get married and
Speaker 1: have a family. Now I'm walking into this chapter of
Speaker 1: my life with a sense of confidence that whether or
Speaker 1: not I use them or not, the fact that I
Speaker 1: know that I did this for myself and for my
Speaker 1: future family or for my future husband. It's making me,
Speaker 1: you know, feel like I have more options. And there's
Speaker 1: nothing better than feeling like you're more free, I think, right,
Speaker 1: because I have so many people I know that are
Speaker 1: now divorced. I mean, I'm thirty six, I was engaged
Speaker 1: at one point, broke it off, and I feel like
Speaker 1: now like statistically, I've like skipped my divorce if I
Speaker 1: was never going to have one, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: Like I'm like, Okay, well I don't save some money,
Speaker 1: I spend it on the eggs. Um. Yeah, So I
Speaker 1: think now the next step is I mean, I'm single,
Speaker 1: I'm dating, and I'm It's funny though, I almost sometimes
Speaker 1: I have to stop myself from like telling the guy,
Speaker 1: oh hey, I throze my eggs because like, like too much,
Speaker 1: I don't want. I Also, I know that that's like
Speaker 1: a concern to like, if I'm a guy and I'm
Speaker 1: dating around, it's like, of course you're gonna want to
Speaker 1: pick the fresher eggs. Of course you're gonna go if
Speaker 1: you're younger. Yeah, sure, guys are really think I don't
Speaker 1: know date one, Like, don't bring it up on date one.
Speaker 1: I have you guys, I have brought it up on it. No.
Speaker 1: I have been like yeah, and they're like, so do mind?
Speaker 1: Like how old are you? Come back on the How
Speaker 1: to Date episode? Oh my god, Lord help us all
Speaker 1: with that. I've got so many stories. And how did
Speaker 1: you feel during the process of when you were giving
Speaker 1: yourself the shots and all of that. I was a
Speaker 1: different thing because when I was going through it, I
Speaker 1: was trying to get pregnant apparently, versus you were doing
Speaker 1: it just to make sure that I had you had
Speaker 1: the security. Yeah. Well I was a little diva about it,
Speaker 1: like I was like really afraid to I've never given
Speaker 1: myself an injection before, Like I'm not a drug addict,
Speaker 1: you know what, even like I'm just like I'm not
Speaker 1: used to it, Like I'm just I don't know, like
Speaker 1: I do get you know, injections in my face. But
Speaker 1: like that's someone else is doing it, right. This is different.
Speaker 1: This is like, oh my god, if I miss and
Speaker 1: I hit a nerve or something, what's going to happen?
Speaker 1: So I decided to make it a thing for my
Speaker 1: first shot, and I like went to Malibu and stayed
Speaker 1: the night in like at the at the Malibu beach
Speaker 1: in and I like woke up and I like prayed,
Speaker 1: and I like was like, Okay, here we go. We're
Speaker 1: doing this journey because it's like, you know, eighteen days
Speaker 1: of shots. And I grabbed my my stomach and I
Speaker 1: was like, thank god, I've gained a little weight. There's
Speaker 1: some fat there. And I just pretended like I was
Speaker 1: injecting a piece of chicken or something, and I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: let's do this. This isn't my body. Here we go.
Speaker 1: And it was fine to YouTube video totally so many times,
Speaker 1: and then I like would I found myself like talking
Speaker 1: to the lady and I was like, is this right,
Speaker 1: And she's like it's like she's not really there. But
Speaker 1: I was like, really, it was scary. But now that
Speaker 1: you're saying that, I had totally just blocked out the
Speaker 1: memory of giving myself shots. That's the crazy thing about
Speaker 1: doing this process. Like I had given myself so many
Speaker 1: different rounds of shots that I remember I would go
Speaker 1: in and it would be crunchy in the spot because
Speaker 1: I had injected the same area, so because you know
Speaker 1: you have your comforted Yeah, okay, this spot right, jam.
Speaker 1: But then yeah, she's right, Daddy's so good about giving
Speaker 1: it in this spot, right. But after so many rounds,
Speaker 1: that spot is like you know what, f you go
Speaker 1: find a new spot? Yeah did the other side. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I totally blacked that out until you were just
Speaker 1: saying that now. Like it was weird too, because then
Speaker 1: you get a little bit like after you've done it,
Speaker 1: maybe you're in for like a week, you're like, I'm
Speaker 1: a pro, you know, you get like a little cocky.
Speaker 1: Like I was like, I can go to this party
Speaker 1: now and then I'll just do it in the bathroom.
Speaker 1: And I did. I was like, this hasn't been to
Speaker 1: ruin my life. I mean I didn't like drink while
Speaker 1: I was doing it or anything like that, but like
Speaker 1: I it was because I did it um like around Halloween,
Speaker 1: like into November, and it was like, you know you
Speaker 1: just start like going to different people's holiday holiday stuff. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was just more of that time, and I was
Speaker 1: like I had birthday parties and things. I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm bringing my kit, I'm bringing my needles. I talk
Speaker 1: about my purse and I did it. Would you would
Speaker 1: you consider doing another round if more time went by,
Speaker 1: or do you think if you were to meet somebody,
Speaker 1: Let's say I just had somebody in calling it calling
Speaker 1: in your now in eight weeks, so you meet somebody
Speaker 1: in eight weeks from now, you fall in love. Would
Speaker 1: you try to get pregnant naturally or would you use
Speaker 1: your younger, fresher eggs. I would try and get pregnant
Speaker 1: naturally first. I think that's ideal, and obviously I want
Speaker 1: to save those eggs, so if I because that's what
Speaker 1: my doctor said. Um, he was like, you know, you
Speaker 1: may not even use these. I have people come in
Speaker 1: and then they meet the love of their life a
Speaker 1: year later because they're just so like, there's something about
Speaker 1: being free of this, you know. Do you think you
Speaker 1: would keep them stored anyway forever? So okay. I was
Speaker 1: actually just talking about this with my one of my
Speaker 1: best guy friends. Him and his partner are talking about
Speaker 1: having kids, and he was like, we were hanging out
Speaker 1: one night. We've known each other since kindergarten, so he
Speaker 1: has the he can ask me this stuff. So we've
Speaker 1: had a little wine and he's like, I've got the
Speaker 1: energy and the courage to ask you this, Can I
Speaker 1: have one of your eggs? It's like no, I'm like,
Speaker 1: are you kidding me? That's no. No, I'm like really protective.
Speaker 1: He's like, okay, but what if you sorry, Sadie, what
Speaker 1: if you die? And I was like, You're so lucky.
Speaker 1: I'm on my second glass of wine right now, Like
Speaker 1: what in the actual okay? And I was like, actually,
Speaker 1: I was like I don't when I signed the form,
Speaker 1: you know where you say, what do you want to
Speaker 1: do with them? Like if you do pass away? Like
Speaker 1: I don't know what's going to happen in life. There
Speaker 1: were only two options, and it was either you donate
Speaker 1: them to science, to people who need them or science
Speaker 1: or what have you, and or you destroy them. I
Speaker 1: chose the latter because I just felt like that's their
Speaker 1: mind and I don't want anyone else to have them now.
Speaker 1: But I think I was hopped up on hormones when
Speaker 1: I signed it, and so now yeah, like I'm like
Speaker 1: I definitely shot, you know, but like now I totally
Speaker 1: have a different perspective, Like now I may give them
Speaker 1: to a family that like can't or my sisters, you know,
Speaker 1: that's what I'm gonna do. So that's what I'm gonna
Speaker 1: I need to, you know, obviously work it up, but
Speaker 1: I don't. Also, they shouldn't make you sign things when
Speaker 1: you're not. I was such a psychopath at the end.
Speaker 1: At the end, I was like I was. I was
Speaker 1: literally like I was great up until two days before
Speaker 1: and I called my mom and I was like, I
Speaker 1: don't know if I want to yell at people, cry
Speaker 1: or just like fall asleep. I don't know what's happening
Speaker 1: in my life right now, but like I shouldn't be driving.
Speaker 1: I told him about how I broke down going because
Speaker 1: I missed the entrance for taco, about I mean things.
Speaker 1: I swear to god, this is real. This is real.
Speaker 1: You turn the smallest thing is that for real? A
Speaker 1: full breakout my husband, and it's a talk about I
Speaker 1: couldn't find the place to you, like full break and
Speaker 1: you have to imagine he's at work. He's like, hey, babe,
Speaker 1: you good, You're not enough? Actually okay, like did you
Speaker 1: get arrested? Like what's happening up? I just wanted to
Speaker 1: be in cheese. Oh my, that is epic right there.
Speaker 1: And then you're and then I get off the phone,
Speaker 1: like it could have been nicer. Yeah, how did he
Speaker 1: offer to get me? One? Didn't he offer to leave
Speaker 1: his job and get me? And You're like, I'm not
Speaker 1: even pregnant yet, Oh my god. No. I know I
Speaker 1: had to like not go on dates during that time too,
Speaker 1: because I was good because you're already bringing up date one.
Speaker 1: I know, well you know when you do bring it
Speaker 1: up date one, and the guy's like good to know
Speaker 1: that he's probably know I And honestly, I don't care
Speaker 1: at this point, like I'm at a I'm at a
Speaker 1: place in my life where like this is me take
Speaker 1: it or leave it. Like obviously I'm not going to
Speaker 1: like roll up and like show them the photos of
Speaker 1: my eggs, but like you know, if it comes up,
Speaker 1: like I feel like I'm proud of it, Like I'm
Speaker 1: like I did this, This is so cool. And I
Speaker 1: think like you're saying, like the guy that is my
Speaker 1: guy will be like thank you for doing that, because
Speaker 1: I don't want your old eggs. But also, I mean,
Speaker 1: it's crazy even getting pregnant this time. I mean, when
Speaker 1: I went in and everything was good, he's like, well,
Speaker 1: because you are advanced maternal age. I'm thirty eight, he goes,
Speaker 1: you go and do another round of testing the insurance
Speaker 1: covers this time, and I'm like, advanced maternal you know,
Speaker 1: I didn't even like hearing those words. And like thirty
Speaker 1: eight is considered advanced geriatric. Yeah, Like, which is gotta
Speaker 1: I mean, it just puts so much pressure on people
Speaker 1: that you know, everybody's getting married later. Now. It's not
Speaker 1: like when you know, we were kids and our parents
Speaker 1: all met in high school and they all got My
Speaker 1: parents met when they were nine and eleven, they went
Speaker 1: to prom together. Like this is the stuff that we
Speaker 1: have to see. What's happening now? People are getting married
Speaker 1: in their thirties, forties, whatever. And so when you're going
Speaker 1: into the doctor advanced maternal age at thirty eight, you're like, wow,
Speaker 1: imagine going in there. And I mean when so many
Speaker 1: of my followers are like, I'm thirty seven years old
Speaker 1: and I'm trying to decide if I should freeze my age.
Speaker 1: But there's also the pressure of you know, I do
Speaker 1: freeze megs and then I don't eat somebody, and then
Speaker 1: now it's five years later and I definitely want to
Speaker 1: have a child. Yeah, do you do it on your own?
Speaker 1: Do you do it on your own. I wouldn't, but
Speaker 1: I don't think that it's I think you can't. I mean,
Speaker 1: obviously it's a six year old Sadie wouldn't write. Who
Speaker 1: knows where I'll be. I'll be like the Octo Mom.
Speaker 1: I thought about the honestly single Octo Mom Sadie. Everyone
Speaker 1: will be like, wow, that's a reality show. Then I
Speaker 1: can pay for it. Oh my god, it'll be so exciting,
Speaker 1: you know what. I'll pitch it, I'll produce. Thank you.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I really appreciate it. Yeah, you know
Speaker 1: right now, I would be like, no, I'm I'm going
Speaker 1: I want my person. I want my person and I
Speaker 1: want to have a family with that guy. But at
Speaker 1: the same time, you know, I'm also I'm not opposed
Speaker 1: to adopting, like because I don't even know if. I mean,
Speaker 1: the eggs are viable and they're great, but like, who
Speaker 1: knows if I can carry it? Who knows? If you know,
Speaker 1: would you be open to adopting now or would you
Speaker 1: want to wait as well for that? I mean I
Speaker 1: want to wait. Yeah, and you you told me that
Speaker 1: you're I haven't adopted brother from Guatemala. I was twenty
Speaker 1: seven when my mom adopted him when he was five.
Speaker 1: Can you walk us through that process a little bit,
Speaker 1: because a lot of people were asking about adoption also
Speaker 1: in regards to from foster to adoption as well. Fostering
Speaker 1: is so important, especially you know, I'm from Detroit and
Speaker 1: I worked in the foster care, like in foster care,
Speaker 1: working with those kids as a therapist, and there are
Speaker 1: great foster pearance. Of course we always hear about the
Speaker 1: horrible stories in the news, but the majority of them
Speaker 1: do it because they love children and they want to
Speaker 1: take care of them and they want to give them stipila.
Speaker 1: How do you even get started doing something like that.
Speaker 1: It's a it's a pretty long process of background checks, interviews,
Speaker 1: um you know, uh, letters from people in your life
Speaker 1: so that you know that bouge for you as a parent,
Speaker 1: as a human, why you're doing this. They come in
Speaker 1: and check the home, They come in and observe. It's
Speaker 1: a it's a really long process because they're placing kids
Speaker 1: in these homes until they're either adopted a lot of them.
Speaker 1: You know, there's a huge percentage of kids in the
Speaker 1: foster in foster care that never get adopted, right, But
Speaker 1: these families are angels. So when my mom went to Guatemala,
Speaker 1: she had gone to Mexico and then she went to
Speaker 1: Guatemala and she was visiting to go with like a
Speaker 1: group where she was just going on. She was just
Speaker 1: going on vacation, and she visited uh An orphanage and
Speaker 1: she met Diego and he was four, he had just
Speaker 1: turned four, and it took her a year to adopt him.
Speaker 1: Very Angelina Jolia of her very I mean, you just
Speaker 1: go on vacation and pick up a kid, okay, kid,
Speaker 1: I always look for a sun hat or but sure
Speaker 1: that works too. That was sorry. I had to light
Speaker 1: in the mood of touch, just a touch. We needed
Speaker 1: you in here fifteen minutes ago. That was my reaction.
Speaker 1: She called me and she said, I fell in love
Speaker 1: with Diego in Guatemala and I'm going to bring him home.
Speaker 1: And I said, are you crazy, I'm twenty seven years
Speaker 1: old to be your kid? Yes, And she said no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: just go to the house and go look at the
Speaker 1: photo on the counter. And so I was like, I
Speaker 1: was just why. I just felt that I was like,
Speaker 1: you already raised me? Are you? Were? You an only
Speaker 1: child of two older half sisters. But so we have
Speaker 1: different moms, so I'm her only biological child. So I
Speaker 1: was like, why don't you just go travel? Like, go travel?
Speaker 1: Don't you want to be free? And look what happened? Diego?
Speaker 1: Now I'm so close. I finally went over to the
Speaker 1: house and looked on the counter at that picture and
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, it's so cute, such a sad
Speaker 1: ending if you're like and I never spoke to I
Speaker 1: love that so much. We have so many more things
Speaker 1: we need to get into, but unfortunately have to take
Speaker 1: a little break. So I'm excited. We have a guest
Speaker 1: coming on in a second. Her name's Michelle, and she
Speaker 1: also froze her eggs, but she got pregnant with a
Speaker 1: sperm donor, which reminds me of a story from when
Speaker 1: I was seventeen, eighteen years old and I came to
Speaker 1: Los Angeles, which is so crazy considering all the things
Speaker 1: that you know, ended up happening with me trying to
Speaker 1: get pregnant and whatnot. But I was like super broke.
Speaker 1: I worked in the marrim at Cia and with a roommate,
Speaker 1: we lived in a studio apartment. You know, I was
Speaker 1: also a hostess. And I was like, really, just like,
Speaker 1: we barely have enough money to get the pink dout
Speaker 1: we're ordering, so we were like a desperation central. And
Speaker 1: I pulled open like I can't remember, like I was
Speaker 1: looking at my boss is like Hollywood reporter or whatever
Speaker 1: it was, and I saw that somebody was wanting to
Speaker 1: harvest somebody's eggs and they were going to pay ten
Speaker 1: thousand dollars for it. And I was like, I didn't
Speaker 1: talk to anybody about because I knew I was gonna
Speaker 1: get judge. But I'm like, that could be a good thing.
Speaker 1: Ten thousand dollars to me. Ten thousand dollars. People assume
Speaker 1: when they think about me that like I had a
Speaker 1: trust fund, I had all this money. I didn't. I
Speaker 1: was freaking broke. As a joke, like I didn't even
Speaker 1: have a credit card, Like it was a situation. Um.
Speaker 1: So I was like, you know what, I think I
Speaker 1: could do this. So I called the number on the
Speaker 1: thing and I'm like, hi, um, I was just curious
Speaker 1: that I saw something. I didn't say my name, thank god,
Speaker 1: but I was like, I saw that you're wanting to
Speaker 1: pay somebody for their eggs. You know, I wasn't thinking
Speaker 1: of the repercussion anything. You know, you're just a dumb kid.
Speaker 1: And the person's like, great, I just have a couple
Speaker 1: of questions for you. Do you have blue you know
Speaker 1: we pay extra for certain things. Do you have blue eyes?
Speaker 1: And like I have blue eyes? And he's like great,
Speaker 1: And then they asked a couple of other questions, you know,
Speaker 1: like a bah blah blah blah blah blah. And then
Speaker 1: everything's going well and he's like, I think we should
Speaker 1: set a meeting. Oh one last question, where'd you go
Speaker 1: to college? And I go I didn't And he goes, oh, well,
Speaker 1: actually you're no longer in contention? What what I was like?
Speaker 1: I remember I looked at my roommate and I'm like,
Speaker 1: they don't even want me, and they're not gonna want
Speaker 1: you either because you didn't go to college either. So
Speaker 1: then I actually talked to my mom and dad about
Speaker 1: it and they were like, day, what are you thinking
Speaker 1: like that? What have you lost your mind? I was like,
Speaker 1: maybe a good thing. I brought it up to you
Speaker 1: guys before I found the next at I was like, no,
Speaker 1: they would have been like laughing at me. If I
Speaker 1: was like, but can I have some money? They'd be
Speaker 1: like go kick rocks, get a third job. Um, but yeah,
Speaker 1: that was my story. But anyways, Michelle, I'm excited to
Speaker 1: hear about yours. And you are glowing, beautiful, pregnant twenty
Speaker 1: eight weeks. It's the first week of my um of
Speaker 1: my third try mystery. Wow, it's a trip, like it
Speaker 1: just popped out. It's a little boy, a little boy.
Speaker 1: Do you have a name? Pecked? You don't have to
Speaker 1: tell yet. I mean, like my friend's son wants me
Speaker 1: to name him Thelonias. I like that. So tell us
Speaker 1: a little bit about your story, like and also we
Speaker 1: have to ask all those annoying questions like how old
Speaker 1: you are and all those types of things. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: so give it to us. Okay. Um, we'll maybe tell
Speaker 1: us how old you are and then what led you
Speaker 1: to this? Okay, I'm forty six, no way, And it's
Speaker 1: it's so weird because I don't think about age. But
Speaker 1: I froze my eggs in eleven and so how were
Speaker 1: you in I'm very bad and go to college. Um,
Speaker 1: that would be thirties seven. And I did it because
Speaker 1: I had a little store up in San Francisco and
Speaker 1: it was the recession it was really intense period in time,
Speaker 1: and I ended up getting diagnosed with cancer and it
Speaker 1: was the first thing I thought of was to freeze
Speaker 1: my eggs and UM, but it wasn't something that they suggested.
Speaker 1: It is like immediately I was like, Okay, this is
Speaker 1: going to be intense this year, and on top of it,
Speaker 1: I don't want to potentially be um sterile from this.
Speaker 1: And so I ended up freezing my eggs and and
Speaker 1: then I went through like cancer treatment up in San
Speaker 1: Francisco at ECSF and UM. And then it circled around
Speaker 1: where last year was forty five and I was like
Speaker 1: dating a guy that was a total mess, and I
Speaker 1: was like I don't have time for this, Like what
Speaker 1: am I doing here? Like I just I can't be
Speaker 1: with like a forty five year old baby, you know,
Speaker 1: Like I don't want a forty five yeld baby. And
Speaker 1: I got out of that night, but this stress, like
Speaker 1: I didn't realize I wanted a kid so badly, Like
Speaker 1: I did it. Obviously I did it froze my eggs,
Speaker 1: so it's important to me. But I kept thinking I'd
Speaker 1: meet the right person and then I UM. Last year,
Speaker 1: I was talking to a friend who's adopted a girl,
Speaker 1: a little baby girl, and she has three boys. And
Speaker 1: she's like, Hommy, that's my last name, and she's like,
Speaker 1: just have a baby and then you can meet the guy.
Speaker 1: And then just through a series of of things. That
Speaker 1: month when she said that came up, I had to
Speaker 1: pay my storage for you for my eggs. So I
Speaker 1: went to go see my doctor in San Francisco, who
Speaker 1: froze them, and he like when I walked in, he
Speaker 1: started crying and he's like, Michelle, I love seeing patients
Speaker 1: like you. It's amazing you're here. Um. I love him.
Speaker 1: His name's Mitchell Rosen in San Francisco. He's incredible. The
Speaker 1: next thing I knew, I was just on the journey
Speaker 1: of doing IVF and like it's so cool because like
Speaker 1: everything kind of panned out like where I had like
Speaker 1: cash flow come last year, like things have just been
Speaker 1: like magically like unfolding to get to this place. And
Speaker 1: it worked. So in April seventeenth this year, I had
Speaker 1: I did three transfers. I found sperm last year. Okay,
Speaker 1: I have to stop you. Yes, that was a whole
Speaker 1: other thing where I was like, I mean, did he
Speaker 1: go to college? He did? That was a PSI student,
Speaker 1: which is kind of funny. So I feel like he's
Speaker 1: in l a somewhere, but he's UM and he The
Speaker 1: funny thing is like did you see it? So you
Speaker 1: know what he looks like. I know what he looks
Speaker 1: like as a child. Oh, most of them, it's literally
Speaker 1: like Tinder. It's like it's like but you never have
Speaker 1: to go in it, like the dream come true. There's
Speaker 1: like it's a website. Well, like there's a few. So
Speaker 1: there's one UM smaller sperm bank in the East Bay
Speaker 1: that's like it was started by lesbian couples, like I
Speaker 1: don't know, fifteen years ago and right now I can't
Speaker 1: remember the name of it. So I looked at that
Speaker 1: one because I know that they really go into like
Speaker 1: looking for good character of sperm donors. And then I
Speaker 1: ended up finding my sperm at California Cryobank, which they
Speaker 1: have a huge um how much does it cost to
Speaker 1: get a sperm? So a vial of sperm is a
Speaker 1: thousand dollars? That is not that now and it's and
Speaker 1: how much how much does a vial? That I know,
Speaker 1: how much does a vial? How far does the vial go?
Speaker 1: Did a vile last you all through transfers. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: my doctor worked with me because usually they asked you
Speaker 1: to um to like get to sper sperm vials, and
Speaker 1: I just bought one and I sent it up there
Speaker 1: to him, like they have to. You have to pay
Speaker 1: extra to pay to have it frozen sent up like
Speaker 1: through FedEx or whatever. How long did it take you
Speaker 1: to pick X? Wait? Wait? How long did it take
Speaker 1: you to pick him? It took me a few weeks
Speaker 1: because it's overwhelming. So I sat down and looked. I
Speaker 1: was like whoa, Like this is a lot. And then
Speaker 1: I had to go back and regroup and look at
Speaker 1: it like a month later, and I ended up buying
Speaker 1: his sperm in September. But I went through a process
Speaker 1: of like looking there were some donors that had their
Speaker 1: adult photos, and there's like this one really cute guy
Speaker 1: that like had a master's and like production and like
Speaker 1: what seemed like very like creative, like served hiked and
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, I could date this guy. And
Speaker 1: then I heard his interview with like the like someone
Speaker 1: at the sperm bank and he had a chip on
Speaker 1: his shoulder, and I was like, if I'm going to
Speaker 1: be a single mom, like I really want like someone
Speaker 1: that's like happy joy, you know, doesn't stay on there,
Speaker 1: like if you could ever reach out to the sperm donor.
Speaker 1: So that's the other thing that helps. So like there's
Speaker 1: like literally like a thousand donors. So I like I
Speaker 1: picked filters that like narrowed down my start. So one
Speaker 1: of them was I decided to do an open downer
Speaker 1: so that if my baby wants to reach out to
Speaker 1: the dad, he could do. Now, I love your your
Speaker 1: sperm donor, he said, yeah, yeah, and almost so I won't.
Speaker 1: I don't know who he is, and we won't now
Speaker 1: until my baby is eighteen if my baby wants to
Speaker 1: reach out to him. But at least it's like another
Speaker 1: family mamber, your soul mate. Who knows, I could wait
Speaker 1: eighteen years. I've been sing all this long. Wow, I
Speaker 1: think that's so amazing that you can pick that, because
Speaker 1: that's what I was thinking, Like, when you are telling
Speaker 1: your son, it's so nice to be able to give
Speaker 1: them that option. Right when do you think you'll tell
Speaker 1: your son? I feel like right away, it's like why,
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sure it's going to come up. I'm
Speaker 1: just kind of trusting the journey on that. I mean,
Speaker 1: this is so incredible. And then so you send it,
Speaker 1: you send it, you fed exit, you pay baxtra f
Speaker 1: and then so this is the doctor, so I he
Speaker 1: worked with me on my one sperm vile because I'm
Speaker 1: doing this sellout. So it's like it's still a lot
Speaker 1: of money. You know, how much did you spend? I
Speaker 1: think I did a spreadsheet almost like fell over. It
Speaker 1: was mind's less probably than a lot of people. But
Speaker 1: I spent about grand Yeah. Do you think you would
Speaker 1: ever do it again? I don't know. It depends because
Speaker 1: now I still have half of the sperm up north,
Speaker 1: and I have eleven eggs left because I had a
Speaker 1: huge fertility. Like when when they harvested my eggs, they
Speaker 1: took out twenty three And did you do PGF before?
Speaker 1: You didn't? And then for your you said you did
Speaker 1: three transfers. So for your first two, did you get
Speaker 1: pregnant or um? I think I had like a chemical
Speaker 1: predicate and then the second one didn't work. How what
Speaker 1: was your emotional state during that time? Now that I'm
Speaker 1: out of it and I'm pregnant, like I feel so
Speaker 1: much more. It took a few weeks into pregnancy, like
Speaker 1: maybe two months, but like I'm so much more stable,
Speaker 1: Like I don't. I don't think I realized like how
Speaker 1: emotional I was during the IVF process, because as hormones
Speaker 1: are intense, the hormones are intense. I almost felt like
Speaker 1: I shut down the world around me because I didn't
Speaker 1: want anybody to know the level of how control I
Speaker 1: was totally that. I feel like it's the pill, like
Speaker 1: during the process. You have to take the pill when
Speaker 1: you start a new cycle, and you're on it for
Speaker 1: like a month or so, and then you start doing
Speaker 1: injections or whatever. At least for me, because I wasn't
Speaker 1: taking out eggs each round already at them, the pill
Speaker 1: was crazy, Like I just feel like I got for me,
Speaker 1: it was like my thing was like depression. That's how
Speaker 1: I was as well. That turned really manifested into anxiety.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's just it's so crazy the things that
Speaker 1: we do to ourselves over things that we cannot control.
Speaker 1: On that note, we have Julia Sadler on the line,
Speaker 1: and she wrote a book called Pray Big Things, and
Speaker 1: she is a mom to triplets who struggled with infertility,
Speaker 1: and so I think it would be really interesting to
Speaker 1: get her perspective on all of this all right. Here
Speaker 1: we are back, and I think Julia Sadler is on
Speaker 1: the line. Hello, Julia, Hi, how are you going. I'm great,
Speaker 1: Thanks for coming on with us. We really appreciate for
Speaker 1: having me so nice. I thank you for having me.
Speaker 1: I was wondering if you could share a little bit
Speaker 1: about your story with us. So many people that listen
Speaker 1: to the podcast, you know, one of their main questions
Speaker 1: was like, how you know, how do you stay strong
Speaker 1: throughout having multiple miscarriages and things like that. So, I mean,
Speaker 1: I think your story will truly resonate and um, so
Speaker 1: I would. I would love to hear from you. Okay, awesome, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, I think it was so interesting to experience
Speaker 1: miscarriages after becoming a professional counselor because I knew, like
Speaker 1: I knew it was important to stay close to your spouse,
Speaker 1: and I knew it was important the process of feelings.
Speaker 1: But it's just totally different knowing what you're supposed to
Speaker 1: do and then actually experiencing it. And I know that
Speaker 1: you're familiar with that pain and that struggle. But my
Speaker 1: husband and I we were we were junior high sweethearts
Speaker 1: and we've been together for a long time. And we
Speaker 1: just never had any reason to think there was any
Speaker 1: problem getting pregnant. It was just something we weren't ready
Speaker 1: to do. And so at seven, when we've been married
Speaker 1: about seven years, we decided it was time, and I
Speaker 1: got pregnant super easily, and I remember just thinking, wow,
Speaker 1: like that wasn't too hard. And just a few weeks
Speaker 1: later and up losing that first child, and we were
Speaker 1: very sad, we're very heartbroken about it. That it was
Speaker 1: so interesting how many people reached out to us since
Speaker 1: that they had had the same experience. And so while
Speaker 1: we were we were sad, but we weren't just completely
Speaker 1: in despair, and since it seemed like it was something
Speaker 1: a lot of people had gone through. But then we
Speaker 1: got pregnant again unless that child, and then a months
Speaker 1: later get pregnant again, and so three most carriages in
Speaker 1: less than six months. Did seem like something was wrong. Um,
Speaker 1: And but that was a very difficult time hellow marriage,
Speaker 1: And so we decided we weren't gonna pray super specifically.
Speaker 1: And I'd always people think it's crazy. I had always
Speaker 1: wanted multiples, That's something I'd always desired, And so we
Speaker 1: just decided we weren't going to be embarrassed God for
Speaker 1: anything that we prayed for multiples, three children, and then
Speaker 1: we went and saw our fertility doctor who and did
Speaker 1: put me on certain medication and said, yeah, yeah, make
Speaker 1: you crazy. Um it any super emotional. And we were
Speaker 1: at this retreat that week and I was like, I
Speaker 1: just need to not talk to because I was like
Speaker 1: prying during Like I mean, it wasn't even that of
Speaker 1: a story, and I was just like, oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: that's the best thing I've ever heard. I was like, Ryan,
Speaker 1: I'm actin crazy, like I can't. I don't need to
Speaker 1: hear talking to anybody. Um. Yeah. And so we were
Speaker 1: really open in us when so many people reached out
Speaker 1: and said they had had similar things. But yes, when
Speaker 1: people tell me they're taking clomad, I'm like, okay, nothing
Speaker 1: counts right now. So even creating anything yourself says or
Speaker 1: your friends, just maybe go into hanging out at home
Speaker 1: for a while. But we we did. We ended up
Speaker 1: conceiving triplets and it was just incredible, miraculous and um,
Speaker 1: very very you know, difficult road to get there, but
Speaker 1: we're very thankful for our miracle babies, which were the
Speaker 1: results of praying and fertility treatments. So after your three miscarriages,
Speaker 1: that is that when you started the clomad or were
Speaker 1: you on it throughout the entire time. No, so our
Speaker 1: doctors told them that you don't really seek medical help
Speaker 1: and tell three miscarriages, but seems like a lot to
Speaker 1: go through before you took out some help. But now
Speaker 1: it wasn't until afterwards and that I went on clomad
Speaker 1: and then some few shots that kind of helped with ovulation. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I did those as well. Um, did you what did
Speaker 1: you like I was talking about when I was either
Speaker 1: having a mischaracter, if I had a chemical pregnancy, or
Speaker 1: if I just wasn't actually getting pregnant. I just you said,
Speaker 1: you know, an important thing is to really communicate with
Speaker 1: your spouse. I was not doing that. I was really
Speaker 1: deep down inside of myself, like trying to show my
Speaker 1: emotions to anybody. Um, how how did you handle it? Yeah?
Speaker 1: So the first one, Um, I really was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: this is a test, this is a test of our replationships,
Speaker 1: Like I just need it. I need to do practice
Speaker 1: what our breach. I need to do what I know
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to do. And so the first thing, I
Speaker 1: feel like I was like, I'm sposed. Degree, I let
Speaker 1: myself gree that was honest with Ryan. But then the
Speaker 1: second one, I definitely was more discouraged afterwards, and it
Speaker 1: was very tempting to withdraw and kind of be more isolated.
Speaker 1: I definitely stopped going to baby shower. I had thirteen
Speaker 1: pregnant friends that years, I know, like Instagram friends, like
Speaker 1: real friends, and it was just like babies were everywhere.
Speaker 1: And so there's been things. I mean, I'm not at
Speaker 1: all would never say we did things perfectly. It was
Speaker 1: a very big struggle, but there are just two things.
Speaker 1: The idea that honesty creates intimacy, and so being honest
Speaker 1: with Ryan, I mean I just got out of myself
Speaker 1: and my friends just about what I was feeling and
Speaker 1: what I need. And then also just the same we
Speaker 1: say and therapy you have to feel it to heal it.
Speaker 1: And so instead of yeah, I just I didn't even
Speaker 1: come up with that, that was just something we say
Speaker 1: all the time. And so even though it's uncomfortable to
Speaker 1: be angry and it's uncomfortable to be sad, and definitely
Speaker 1: like our culture isn't like, oh, good job for grieving,
Speaker 1: you know, that's definitely not something celebrated, but just letting
Speaker 1: yourself feel what you need to feel or else it
Speaker 1: does come out in other ways, which just in the
Speaker 1: wow anxiety depression. And so I didn't do that perfectly,
Speaker 1: but I did challenge myself to let myself feel and
Speaker 1: whatever that is without judgment. So I have a question,
Speaker 1: so a lot I'm going to ask you, because you
Speaker 1: are also a counselor. I have a lot of people
Speaker 1: that have written in questions in regards to miscarriages. Um,
Speaker 1: for somebody who maybe doesn't have a relationship with God
Speaker 1: or doesn't go to church, what are some ways to heal?
Speaker 1: Like somebody's written in that they've had tens ten miscarriages
Speaker 1: behind them, you know, how do you not lose hope? Right?
Speaker 1: And if you're from that from that background, well, and
Speaker 1: everyone has a purpose and I think that regardless of
Speaker 1: what your face background is, Um, there's a reason you're here.
Speaker 1: And it's tempting not to always like to the next thing,
Speaker 1: like I'll be happy when I get pregnant, or when
Speaker 1: I get married, or when I work with teenagers a lot.
Speaker 1: So when I get into that college and they're really
Speaker 1: figuring out what this time is about and if if
Speaker 1: the future doesn't have I'm not if the futurist heaven,
Speaker 1: but if what you want, if you never hit pregnantly,
Speaker 1: if you don't get married, what can you still find
Speaker 1: purpose in for your life? And maybe those things will happen,
Speaker 1: hopefully they do, but that doesn't negate the fact that
Speaker 1: you have an incredible purpose and there is a plan
Speaker 1: for your life and searching out what that is good
Speaker 1: advice and really good advice. And in that same token,
Speaker 1: you know, oftentimes I've had friends that have miscarried, and
Speaker 1: even though I have, I still don't know the right
Speaker 1: words to say, like what do you what advice do
Speaker 1: you give to somebody, either a spouse or a friend
Speaker 1: to say to somebody who's having a miscarriage, had to miscara,
Speaker 1: you know, what is your advice on that. I do
Speaker 1: not think there's a blanket state membered that I really
Speaker 1: encourage people going through to tell people what they need
Speaker 1: because friends and spouses do feel so scared they're going
Speaker 1: to say the wrong thing, and so I don't I
Speaker 1: don't know if there's a blanket state remember what to
Speaker 1: say if you're a spouse or friend. But I think
Speaker 1: a good principle is just remembering that that person is
Speaker 1: still who they always were to For me, I'm super extroverted,
Speaker 1: So my husband knew if I'm just saying I want
Speaker 1: to stay at home, something's off here. And so remembering
Speaker 1: that that friend of that spouse is still the same person,
Speaker 1: shall has the same personality and still needs to be
Speaker 1: reached out to a ministered to in accordance with the
Speaker 1: person you've always known. And then how do you handle
Speaker 1: it if you're pregnant and your friend is having miscarriages?
Speaker 1: Because I yeah, I remember when I was struggling, I
Speaker 1: would have you know, like you're saying, with baby showers
Speaker 1: or any of those things. And it wasn't that I
Speaker 1: wasn't happy for them, right, But I remember also being
Speaker 1: like do I need to be here? And so you
Speaker 1: know how now you know now I am pregnant. So
Speaker 1: if that were to be the case for me, what
Speaker 1: do you think the best way to go about it?
Speaker 1: When a friend is you know, because that happened so much.
Speaker 1: You often get pregnant in groups and you know, like
Speaker 1: it happens and the pain is so raw and I
Speaker 1: don't want to say the wrong and especially when you're
Speaker 1: the pregnant one, you don't want to say the wrong
Speaker 1: thing to the person that isn't absolutely yes, So I
Speaker 1: think being honest is so important. Like my friends that
Speaker 1: were pregnant while we were struggling, they I mean, they
Speaker 1: would tell me, like, I'm pregnant. I know this may
Speaker 1: be hard for you, and we're still praying for you.
Speaker 1: But I just think putting stuff out there is so
Speaker 1: much better than hiding. And I found because there are
Speaker 1: people I kind of obviously got pregnant with triplets, and
Speaker 1: I had a friend I've been struggling with him for
Speaker 1: like for years, and I mean I was going to
Speaker 1: tell home, But what I've found, what I've heard and
Speaker 1: experiences that people already so isolated, so then if you
Speaker 1: don't include them, then it's just even more feeling left out.
Speaker 1: And that's I mean, that's it. I can from other
Speaker 1: people that they do want to be told, they do
Speaker 1: want to rejoice with you, and it's that's to them.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's hard to hear, but it's to us
Speaker 1: to take care of our own emotions, not us to
Speaker 1: other people. And so we have to be responsible for
Speaker 1: doing what we need to do for ourselves. But I've
Speaker 1: heard people say they they've gotten their feelings art because
Speaker 1: they haven't been included in that. So I would enclos
Speaker 1: him to tell their friends and just how they're feeling
Speaker 1: and that they remember their struggle. I found a lot
Speaker 1: of people, especially if they struggle with imfertility for years,
Speaker 1: kind of get forgotten and so it's so important to
Speaker 1: tell that when you remember and you remember their struggle.
Speaker 1: Thank you such good advice. And if you guys wanna
Speaker 1: read Julius book, it's called Pray Big Things. It's amazing
Speaker 1: and we really appreciate you taking the time to talk
Speaker 1: with us today. Thank you for having me. I really
Speaker 1: appreciate it. And you've got three little cutie's. I'm looking
Speaker 1: at their picture right here. Thank you. All right, going
Speaker 1: to take a little break. We have so many questions
Speaker 1: from our listeners. I printed them all out of like
Speaker 1: pages and pages, so I'm gonna try to get there
Speaker 1: as many as possible. So we're gonna bring on Dr
Speaker 1: Katherine Green. She's a board certified O B, g U,
Speaker 1: I N and reproductive and trochnologist. Dr Green. Yeah, Hi, Hi,
Speaker 1: how are you? How are you good? We're all I
Speaker 1: amped up. We have so many questions oh perfect, Um,
Speaker 1: do you mind if I just start rapid fire? Sure? No,
Speaker 1: that's not problem at all. That sounds good. Okay great.
Speaker 1: First main question that a lot of people have asked
Speaker 1: is what age should you freeze your eggs by? Is
Speaker 1: there an age it's too late? Sure? I think that's
Speaker 1: a really good question. At once that I get a
Speaker 1: lot in patents that come to see me in the office. Um,
Speaker 1: So the optimal age is really around age thirty. Um,
Speaker 1: that women should start thinking about egg freezing, um, and
Speaker 1: kind of evaluating where they're at in their life and
Speaker 1: how long it may be before they plan to have kids. Um,
Speaker 1: there isn't. Uh. As women start to get closer to forty,
Speaker 1: we do see a lower response and the eggs themselves, Um,
Speaker 1: I have a higher chance of not making a successful pregnancy.
Speaker 1: So as women approached the age of forty, that's getting
Speaker 1: kind of towards the end of the optimal window. Um.
Speaker 1: And then usually in the lower forties is when I
Speaker 1: would say she probably shouldn't shouldn't pursue that option? Wow, okay, Um?
Speaker 1: And then how do people know? I mean, for example,
Speaker 1: I didn't know that I was going to have fertility
Speaker 1: issues until I started getting pregnant. Is there a way
Speaker 1: to find that out prior? I mean I I was
Speaker 1: only eight when I think nine when I first off
Speaker 1: the pill and started trying to get pregnant. UM. Is
Speaker 1: there a way to find out in advance? So let's
Speaker 1: say you're twenty eight year years old and you're thinking,
Speaker 1: I'm nowhere near settling down and I'm not even anywhere
Speaker 1: near wanting to freeze my eggs, but I am curious
Speaker 1: about my fertility. Is that a possibility? Can you even
Speaker 1: check that? Can you find out? Yeah? I think the
Speaker 1: certain things that may point to their being UM an
Speaker 1: issue with fertility UM some women know already that maybe
Speaker 1: they had a surgery or you know, a flobbian tubermoved
Speaker 1: those things UM obviously would cause an issue with attempting pregnancy. UM.
Speaker 1: If there's heavy uterine bleeding UM or known UM issues
Speaker 1: with the uterus, which as like fibroids or polyps, which
Speaker 1: are benign growth in the uterus UM. What about endometriosis
Speaker 1: and demetriosis is very common and can impact fertility as well.
Speaker 1: So sciences of that that women might notice are painful periods.
Speaker 1: Pain with inner corpse sometimes came with bell movements. UM.
Speaker 1: Those are kind of the big questions that we ask
Speaker 1: and may suggest endometriosist um. Additionally, on ultrasound we may
Speaker 1: see signs which was a big O variant could suggest endometriosis.
Speaker 1: Is there what about STDs UM another good question? So
Speaker 1: a s TVs UM specifically the ones that caused pelvic
Speaker 1: inflammatory disease like GONERI and are the most common ones.
Speaker 1: UM can impair the fulopian tubes, So if a woman
Speaker 1: does have a history of that, it's worthwhile mentioning that
Speaker 1: to her joan the fertility doctors so they can saluate
Speaker 1: if the flobian okay. And then how long would you
Speaker 1: recommend to somebody to be off birth control before they
Speaker 1: try to get pregnant. We as a field used to
Speaker 1: think that women had to come off a couple of
Speaker 1: months before attempting pregnancy. UM, we really don't see that
Speaker 1: there needs to be that washout period. So I say,
Speaker 1: if you're thinking you want to start attempts next month,
Speaker 1: you can go ahead and just stop them right before
Speaker 1: the month you want to conceive, and then attempt right
Speaker 1: away with your next period. And do you think there's
Speaker 1: like the best birth control you know like, if you
Speaker 1: know you're gonna eventually want to have kids, should you
Speaker 1: get should you be on the pill or should you
Speaker 1: be on I don't know the ring or the I
Speaker 1: don't know all the other ones I don't know, but
Speaker 1: you Yeah, no, there's definitely a lot of options out there.
Speaker 1: I think at the end of the day. Um, it
Speaker 1: all comes down to patient preference. So your chances of
Speaker 1: fertility after being on the pill or having an iu D,
Speaker 1: for example, are not significantly different. Um. Basically, I would
Speaker 1: choose the birth control that makes the most sense to
Speaker 1: you in your lifestyle. So if someone women don't want
Speaker 1: to think about having to take a pill every day,
Speaker 1: so and that scenario and iu D may make sense.
Speaker 1: But other women don't like the idea of having something
Speaker 1: in their body, you know, in which case the pill
Speaker 1: may be better. So, UM, it's really what works best
Speaker 1: for her. Okay, now we're going to switch gears a
Speaker 1: little bit. I need to I personally need to know.
Speaker 1: And there was actually another guest on here that had
Speaker 1: the same reaction. Why does chlomad make us crazy? And
Speaker 1: what does it actually do? I need all the details. Sure, Um,
Speaker 1: so Colona is a medication. Um, as it sounds like.
Speaker 1: You know that you if you take as a pill,
Speaker 1: usually for a couple of days at the beginning of
Speaker 1: a cycle, and it can help you form a follic
Speaker 1: color more than one follicle to either time intercourse, I
Speaker 1: do intermination. The way that chlomad works is it sort
Speaker 1: of tricks your brain into thinking that there's no estrogen
Speaker 1: around and um. As a result, your brain kind of
Speaker 1: um kick start and um and stimulates the ovaries to
Speaker 1: produce follicles. So when there's no your brain thinks there's
Speaker 1: no estrogen around, then it will work harder to make
Speaker 1: the ovaries grow a follow color too. Um. So what
Speaker 1: is happening is in response to the clomad um. Since
Speaker 1: your brain thinks there's no astros in there, you can
Speaker 1: sometimes have symptoms of low estrogen. So that's what women
Speaker 1: often go through when the rage going through menopause. Correctly, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: So like mood changes, some conversations, complaine of headaches or
Speaker 1: vaginal dryness, that can all be a result of the
Speaker 1: way that the medicine works. Okay, and then also something
Speaker 1: that my doctor said that I had And I know
Speaker 1: this sounds crazy, but you kind I kind of like
Speaker 1: started blacking out things that were happening to me because
Speaker 1: or not to me, but things that were happening with
Speaker 1: my body because I didn't want to know because then
Speaker 1: I would start researching it. But he said, during you know,
Speaker 1: when some of my ivfs were not working, he said
Speaker 1: that I had a killer cell that refers to like
Speaker 1: natural killer cells is the cell type in our body
Speaker 1: as part of the immune system. UM. And there are
Speaker 1: some people in the fertility world that believe that immunologic
Speaker 1: causes UM may impact pregnancy rate. So if your immune
Speaker 1: system is kind of harder or an overdrive that may
Speaker 1: impair implantation or pregnancy is success. UM. We there's there's
Speaker 1: data to support both, yes, and know that it matters.
Speaker 1: So I think depending on who you talk to, you
Speaker 1: could a different answer. Okay, And then what is pc
Speaker 1: O S? Yeah, So pos PCOS stands for polycystic ovary
Speaker 1: syndrome UM. It's a condition where women have irregular menstrual cycles.
Speaker 1: UM is the most common symptom of it. They these
Speaker 1: women form multiple small um fists in the ovaries and
Speaker 1: they're not actually ovariant sist. They're really follicles in the
Speaker 1: ovaray that haven't gone away, and so what we'll see
Speaker 1: in these women is the typical presentation is irregular menstrual
Speaker 1: cycles ovariant um fists or those small follicles in the ovaries,
Speaker 1: and then often elevated levels of male hormone such as testosterone.
Speaker 1: And what this condition does is it UM prevents them
Speaker 1: from having normal ovulation every month, and so if they're
Speaker 1: not ovulating on a regular interval, stat equates to obviously
Speaker 1: difficulty and conceiving, especially if you're trying to time attempts appropriately.
Speaker 1: And if you have one of these medical conditions, will
Speaker 1: IVF or any of these fertility treatments be covered by insurance? UM?
Speaker 1: I wish it was covered more often than it is. UM.
Speaker 1: It depends on what what and the patients with if
Speaker 1: you have coverage. So we are seeing more employers offer
Speaker 1: this as a benefit UM and WET at my facility
Speaker 1: at r m A definitely work with insurance that patients
Speaker 1: have it UM, but I right now there's still a
Speaker 1: lot of patients that are unfortunately paying out of pocket. Wow.
Speaker 1: And what what is the difference between a chemical pregnancy
Speaker 1: and a topic pregnancy? UM? So, a chemical pregnancy is
Speaker 1: where we just see evidence at the patient's pregnant on
Speaker 1: her blood work, but we don't see anything on ultrasound,
Speaker 1: either in the uterus or anywhere else. UM, And a
Speaker 1: topic pregnancy is where she's definitely pregnant, we see it
Speaker 1: on blood work, but when we do the ultrasound, you
Speaker 1: can see that the pregnancy actually implanted outside of the uterus.
Speaker 1: So the most commonplace would be somewhere along the fallopian tube. UM,
Speaker 1: but we often, not often, I'm sorry, we can also
Speaker 1: see it in the ovary. How common are those to
Speaker 1: happen and are they as common as as miscarriages? UM?
Speaker 1: Definitely not as common as miscarriages, so UM miscarriages. We
Speaker 1: knows that about thirty percent of UM recognized pregnancy result
Speaker 1: in miscarriage. So UM it's miscarriage is so common, and
Speaker 1: I think women that go through that may not realize
Speaker 1: it because if it's not something people often talk about,
Speaker 1: but it is incredibly common. A topic pregnancy, the chance
Speaker 1: of that is much lower. UM. I don't have a
Speaker 1: definitive percent, but it's in the single digit so it's
Speaker 1: much less common than a miscarriage. So if you're not
Speaker 1: trying to get pregnant, you don't actually know that you're pregnant,
Speaker 1: how would you know that you're having a miscarriage. The
Speaker 1: most common sign would be U vaginal bleeding. So if
Speaker 1: you're heavy, if you know you're pregnant based on a
Speaker 1: home pregnancy test, then you haven't been able to get
Speaker 1: into see your doctor yet. If you're having a vaginal bleeding,
Speaker 1: that's something that should be should be looked at either
Speaker 1: by your physician or if it's heavy bleeding, you know,
Speaker 1: seeking more immediate care. Uh. Sometimes women will have like
Speaker 1: heavy menstrual type cramping as well. What if somebody doesn't
Speaker 1: go to the doctor, Um, if they're kind of just
Speaker 1: waiting it out at home to see what happens. I mean,
Speaker 1: I've known someone that doesn't know if they were actually pregnant,
Speaker 1: didn't actually take a pregnancy test, and they just started having,
Speaker 1: you know a lot of bleeding, and then they were like,
Speaker 1: you know what, I don't really want to know if
Speaker 1: I had one, Oh I see, um, well in less
Speaker 1: nor I mean, she she made never actually know if
Speaker 1: she doesn't go in to see somebody, if she had
Speaker 1: what a lot of women may have what they think
Speaker 1: is just a late period that's heavier than usual that
Speaker 1: you know, in theory could have been a lost So
Speaker 1: if she didn't see a doctor in that time period. Um,
Speaker 1: sometimes with the heavier bleeding, you might it might look different,
Speaker 1: or um, you might feel heavier cramps. Um. So those
Speaker 1: may all be suggestive of that, but it's hard to
Speaker 1: know without either blood test or ultrasound. And then I
Speaker 1: just have another question that people have been asking me,
Speaker 1: and I don't actually even know the answer, even though
Speaker 1: I've asked my doctor. I always I always forget to
Speaker 1: follow up. But I my first pregnancy, I was in
Speaker 1: some aid in my second was IVF, and then third
Speaker 1: just happened naturally. I wasn't trying. I didn't even realize
Speaker 1: that I was pregnant because even during the first eight
Speaker 1: weeks before I became pregnant, I was still spotting because
Speaker 1: I've never really had like a perfectly regular period. Okay,
Speaker 1: but why does that happen? And how does that happen
Speaker 1: that you need all of these you know, years and
Speaker 1: years of things and then all of a sudden you
Speaker 1: just get pregnant on your own. Right. Um. Congratulations by
Speaker 1: the way, Yeah, that that is something that we hear
Speaker 1: um from patients sometimes and obviously are UM very happy
Speaker 1: when that that does happen if patients were trying for
Speaker 1: another child, But there there isn't really anything about the
Speaker 1: treatment per se that would make you more fertile afterwards. UM.
Speaker 1: I personally think it's a combination of UM kind of
Speaker 1: a decrease in UH stressed UH autent patients seem like
Speaker 1: they're in a better place like mentally or most really
Speaker 1: and kind of just relax a little bit more. And
Speaker 1: I do think that that can impact things UM and
Speaker 1: once they kind of get a little bit more level
Speaker 1: with regards to that, UM are surprised and able to conceive.
Speaker 1: And just in closing my form, my last question before
Speaker 1: I have to wrap it up, what advice would you
Speaker 1: give to somebody who's struggling. I think it's just the big,
Speaker 1: big message would be keep holding out hope UM, and
Speaker 1: you're not alone. So there's a lot of women that
Speaker 1: experience difficulty and conceiving UM, and it's such a personal
Speaker 1: thing that not everyone will be talking about it, so
Speaker 1: it can be an isolating experience. And I do want
Speaker 1: patience to know that UM, there are ways that we
Speaker 1: can help you and to maintain a positive outlook on
Speaker 1: it and note that, um, you're not alone in experiencing this,
Speaker 1: and there's paths you can take to build your family
Speaker 1: and get the outcome that you're looking for. Thank you
Speaker 1: so much for your time. We really appreciate it. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much. It was a pleasure speaking with you.
Speaker 1: Bye bye. So now we finished up with Katherine Green.
Speaker 1: We're almost out of time. But I could tell Chuck,
Speaker 1: our engineer keeps like giving me a look, like what's
Speaker 1: going on? What do you need? Um? I hadn't, she questioned.
Speaker 1: Happened to me last week? My ex girlfriend hit me
Speaker 1: up and proposed wanting to have a child with me
Speaker 1: out of the blue. Do you like her? M hm? Hold, okay,
Speaker 1: does she want your sperm or she wants you guys
Speaker 1: to go like she wants to have a child. Okay,
Speaker 1: But I have a lot of question. Did you ask?
Speaker 1: Does that mean like are we are we like going
Speaker 1: to hook up or like that's the first question? Okay,
Speaker 1: So like take you got in two minutes? You got
Speaker 1: to tell us, all right, my fel we've been hooking
Speaker 1: up on and off for the past seven years. Well
Speaker 1: that's on you then, and I've been like literally pushing
Speaker 1: away like like, go away, go away, go away, fall
Speaker 1: in love, find somebody you fall in love with who
Speaker 1: loves you. You know what I can, I can already
Speaker 1: tell you something. But having sex with her then well no, seriously, seriously,
Speaker 1: I I have been away for a long period of time.
Speaker 1: How long? Probably about over a year? Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: that's fair. But now she wants to have a baby
Speaker 1: with you. What do you guys think Chuck should do?
Speaker 1: Please write in and let us know. I mean, I
Speaker 1: have my thoughts, but we know I'm gonna know it all,
Speaker 1: so I'm gonna hold it till next week. Thanks for listening.
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