Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's doing a unique pay per
Speaker 1: view event, charging fifty nine dollars to watch two Guinness
Speaker 1: record holders for the world's largest mouths. Lady in the
Speaker 1: tramp a watermelon.
Speaker 2: Wow, that's amazing money.
Speaker 3: You thought Gallagher was messy. Just wait for this.
Speaker 1: It's Laser Story, the segment where we read weird news
Speaker 1: stories around the globe, just like everyone else does, except
Speaker 1: we've got a laser.
Speaker 3: Those other fruit cringes.
Speaker 1: Just this first lazer story is out of California.
Speaker 3: Thirty four year old.
Speaker 1: Ashley Gardina was woken up early in the morning because
Speaker 1: she thought she heard something outside her house.
Speaker 2: Uh, oh, I hate that.
Speaker 3: And she went out her front door to check it out.
Speaker 2: Oh, she's brave.
Speaker 1: As soon as she did, something on the side of
Speaker 1: her home caught her eye. She looked over and saw
Speaker 1: a small hole, and well, I just thought, I'm going
Speaker 1: to have her explain what she saw.
Speaker 4: Crook in the marine and we woke up because he
Speaker 4: heard noise. Oh, here comes to police.
Speaker 1: Came outside.
Speaker 4: I thought somebody was in a roof and I see
Speaker 4: the grass moving and he is feeling around a dirty
Speaker 4: ass arms feeling around.
Speaker 3: This hole outside. There is a whole.
Speaker 4: Man living here for months, living underneath the house. Imagine
Speaker 4: being half awake and seeing it arm, a dirty arm.
Speaker 2: She says it as if she'd be okay with a
Speaker 2: clean arm. Dirty arm, that's the issue.
Speaker 1: As she saw a man's dirty arm pop out of
Speaker 1: a hole underneath her house and immediately she called the cops.
Speaker 2: Don't they have like a shut or something would have
Speaker 2: been a better option for him, like under the house?
Speaker 2: That is crazy.
Speaker 1: Authorities arrived and they were able to coax the man
Speaker 1: out of the hole with a fried egg sandwich, and
Speaker 1: then they were able to remove him from the crawl
Speaker 1: space underneath her home. He was extremely dirty and not
Speaker 1: very sober either.
Speaker 2: Maybe he's just a drunk electrician that just got lost
Speaker 2: on the job and couldn't find his way back out.
Speaker 3: The breaker boxes.
Speaker 1: He was arrested, and Ashley says their family is going
Speaker 1: back to pretty much normal, though she did make her
Speaker 1: husband patch up all the access points to get underneath
Speaker 1: their house.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if they're gonna live under there, he's got to
Speaker 2: pay for it right.
Speaker 1: This next thing is the story is out of wedding world.
Speaker 1: People used to regret the tattoo they got on their
Speaker 1: old spring break and now it's gonna be the tattoo
Speaker 1: they got at their cousin Chad's wedding.
Speaker 3: Can I say that because tattoos are the.
Speaker 1: Hot new party favor to offer guests after a couple
Speaker 1: gets hitched.
Speaker 2: Oh, but I mean there's never any alcohol at weddings,
Speaker 2: so people are probably making really sad choices.
Speaker 1: People are hiring tattoo artists as vendors. Wow, And the
Speaker 1: whole idea is to give people a permanent memento to
Speaker 1: remember your wedding day by. So you get the tattoo
Speaker 1: and then I'm assuming when you get divorced the next year,
Speaker 1: they'll pay for the removal.
Speaker 2: So you just cross out the guy's old initials and
Speaker 2: put in the new initials the next wedding.
Speaker 3: Yah.
Speaker 1: Some people think it's a cute idea. Others think it's
Speaker 1: tacky and weird. It could be maybe even a little
Speaker 1: bit unsanitary.
Speaker 2: Well it's not. You're forcing your guests to get a tattoo,
Speaker 2: or are you.
Speaker 1: It would be awkward if none of your guests wanted
Speaker 1: one after you hired them, But either.
Speaker 2: Way, you end up kidding four up your legs just
Speaker 2: because you feel bad for the guys sitting there.
Speaker 1: Either way, most seem to agree doing it early on
Speaker 1: in the reception is the way to go. You do
Speaker 1: not want tattoos available once everybody's wasted.
Speaker 2: I think you do it only after the tattoo artist
Speaker 2: is wasted.
Speaker 1: Oh god, this next the story is out of concert central. Oh,
Speaker 1: Beyonce just began her Renaissance World tour, and some fans
Speaker 1: are so desperate to go to the shows they're buying
Speaker 1: listening only seats.
Speaker 3: What what is that listening only seats, Litle Johnny.
Speaker 1: Ticketmaster is actually selling tickets for seats that are either
Speaker 1: described as no view or no stage view, so you
Speaker 1: won't actually be able to see Queen Bay.
Speaker 3: Oh come on, but you can still hear her.
Speaker 2: Were you sitting in a janitor's closet or something. You're
Speaker 2: sitting outside in the beard?
Speaker 1: No, Like, they have seats that have a giant pillar
Speaker 1: in front of it, so you can't actually see that.
Speaker 2: Obstructive view is different than no seaview.
Speaker 3: It's more common now.
Speaker 1: So how much will it cost you to just listen
Speaker 1: to Beyonce while seats with nose bleed views on Ticketmaster
Speaker 1: going for around two hundred and twenty six dollars if
Speaker 1: you get a no view seat, basically staring at a
Speaker 1: concrete post that'll only run you one hundred and sixty bucks.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, so much more.
Speaker 2: That's crazy.
Speaker 1: One listen only concert goer says it wasn't that bad
Speaker 1: because she could see part of the screen during the
Speaker 1: concert when she went.
Speaker 3: To the bathroom would you to the bedroom?
Speaker 1: And she even caught a fleeting glimpse of Beyonce when
Speaker 1: she walked to the garbage to throw away her empty cup.
Speaker 2: This is this is you when you know you have
Speaker 2: the best fans ever, is when they're buying these tickets
Speaker 2: and still not complaining.
Speaker 1: The new listening only seats are the music industry's latest
Speaker 1: way to squeeze revenue out of fans, and the fans
Speaker 1: that get those tickets actually aren't even giving bad reviews.
Speaker 3: Five stars for the listening only seats concerts concert.
Speaker 1: This next Lazer story is out of it's Gucci fan yea, okay,
Speaker 1: but something that you're convinced other people are just pretending
Speaker 1: to like, maybe to look cool or to seem trendy.
Speaker 2: Low rise jeans.
Speaker 1: A well known publication did a poll on social media
Speaker 1: here's the top ones. Number seven is people who say
Speaker 1: they love crocs. I agree with that. I don't know
Speaker 1: my friends that have them a lot like they say
Speaker 1: they love them, but do they really every day?
Speaker 2: So they're pretty convincing.
Speaker 1: I mean in the comments, most of the adults there
Speaker 1: said they look ugly and really aren't actually that comfortable.
Speaker 3: Number six caviar.
Speaker 2: I've never tried it.
Speaker 1: People say you don't actually like the flavor, You're just
Speaker 1: trying it to feel rich.
Speaker 2: I don't like row either, just any eggs that are
Speaker 2: from birds.
Speaker 3: I have a hard time with Number five camping.
Speaker 1: People say they like it, but really it's uncomfortable, cold,
Speaker 1: and everything you bring will smell a campfire for weeks.
Speaker 2: Did you guys add Did you add that one into
Speaker 2: this list?
Speaker 3: I know you loved it.
Speaker 1: Number four of things people believe we only do to
Speaker 1: look or sound cool, is running outside as a form
Speaker 1: of exercise.
Speaker 2: His entire college career. I hate it half the time.
Speaker 1: People say it's just so boring.
Speaker 3: Number three is kaleted.
Speaker 1: Eat it because it's good for you, but don't pretend
Speaker 1: that you actually like how it haste.
Speaker 2: But if you massage it before you eat it, you
Speaker 2: gotta just get in there with your hands and squosh
Speaker 2: it around a lot. Yeah, breaks down the fibers.
Speaker 3: Disgusting Number two.
Speaker 1: Extremely spicy stuff, extremely especially things like Carolina reapers. Yeah,
Speaker 1: really hot peppers. You're just looking cool to act a fool. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what my mom always says.
Speaker 2: It made you sound cool to say that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, my mom was cool.
Speaker 1: And the number one trendy thing to do, especially for
Speaker 1: gen z Ors as of late, is driving a stick shift.
Speaker 2: I missed my stick shift, but not in traffic.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: If you're doing it by choice, you're just dumb, all right.
Speaker 3: Speaking of doing it by choice, this guy doesn't have
Speaker 3: to act cool. He is cool.
Speaker 1: Yeah, wine because the owner's just installed a lappool in
Speaker 1: the middle of his gerrarium.
Speaker 2: Oh that's nice. Yeah, it's gonna get workout.
Speaker 1: He's fit and he's not looking like a dummy running
Speaker 1: around jogging around the block either. That sound means lays
Speaker 1: of stories has come to an end for the day.
Speaker 1: We'll do it again, same time on Wednesday.