Speaker 1: Don't you love podcasts? You can literally listen wherever you are.
Speaker 1: Someone left us a review saying that they listen at
Speaker 1: the gym. So if that's you, right now pick up
Speaker 1: the pace and one and two and.
Speaker 2: And the show is gonna start now.
Speaker 3: So we got an email. You've got mail, an email
Speaker 3: that I know certain people here aren't gonna like the
Speaker 3: people who snub their noses at the rules. You think
Speaker 3: the law doesn't apply to them because they're radio celebrity.
Speaker 4: That's right.
Speaker 3: Nothing bad can happen to me because I work on
Speaker 3: the radio. Looking at the two blonds in the room,
Speaker 3: one natural, one not natural.
Speaker 2: I don't think you are.
Speaker 3: You guys all know what email I'm talking about.
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 3: The exit gate to the radio station parking garage has
Speaker 3: finally been fixed.
Speaker 5: There is a moment this morning when I to enter
Speaker 5: the code and let the gate lift up, that I.
Speaker 2: Thought about just ramming it.
Speaker 4: Haven't you ever wanted to do that?
Speaker 3: No, I've never wanted to ram a gate exactly. If
Speaker 3: you haven't heard on the show. This has been a
Speaker 3: big deal around here because the exit gate to the
Speaker 3: parking garage has been stuck open for like the last
Speaker 3: six seven months.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it has been so nice.
Speaker 3: You're supposed to use the entrance gate to access the
Speaker 3: garage and punching your code so security knows who's coming
Speaker 3: in and out of the building. Security shbmirty right not
Speaker 3: to mention so you don't accidentally drive headfirst into another
Speaker 3: car who's trying to leave.
Speaker 2: It's so early when we get here.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but no, broken Alexis have just been casually speeding
Speaker 3: down through the exit lane into the building, giving a
Speaker 3: big middle finger to other people's safety because they don't care.
Speaker 5: My favorite is whenever someone else is punching in the
Speaker 5: code in the entrance and then they see me fly
Speaker 5: by in the exit and they're just I'm like, suckers,
Speaker 5: I've been They're thinking, cool.
Speaker 3: Guess who just got busted for doing the exact same thing.
Speaker 3: A Mocha skinned gullible project of a man. Jose, Yes,
Speaker 3: you got me.
Speaker 2: In trouble Brooke.
Speaker 6: He went up to you, he trusted you for it.
Speaker 7: Literally the other day security stopped Pullan says who are you?
Speaker 7: What company do you work? I'm like, what's going on?
Speaker 7: And they said, why did you drive through the wrong way.
Speaker 1: It's a huge problem and we're trying to stop it,
Speaker 1: so you need to tell everyone doing it.
Speaker 5: Well, if you show up earlier to work, then there's
Speaker 5: no security that.
Speaker 3: The security guard told the building. The building fixed the gate,
Speaker 3: so now you can't go through. Bad enough that he
Speaker 3: was fired from the subway and didn't get his high
Speaker 3: school's diploma. And how do you think he feels, Natty
Speaker 3: brook you did this.
Speaker 2: Yes, though I didn't get caught.
Speaker 8: You're the one that's negative behavior.
Speaker 1: I've never done that in my life until Brooks showed
Speaker 1: me how to do that.
Speaker 7: A lot of guys have said that before.
Speaker 3: Sweet Jose shouldn't even be eligible for the Shot College
Speaker 3: from the mental anguish he's had to go through. He
Speaker 3: needs the day off, but we're gonna send it over
Speaker 3: to a fellow rule followers, right Digital Jake, Jake loves
Speaker 3: I never go into backdoor. It's almost over now.
Speaker 9: But did you realize that all of August has been
Speaker 9: romance Awareness Month. It's the perfect time to reflect and
Speaker 9: appreciate your relationships or, in Jose's case, his steamy ongoing
Speaker 9: flirtation with a sexy Russian scam dating bot Matasha. So
Speaker 9: whether you're married, single, or in the middle of a
Speaker 9: complicated eight person Love Octagon. It's time to celebrate romance
Speaker 9: during a special Heart Eyes edition.
Speaker 3: Of the Shock Color Question of the Day.
Speaker 9: Alexis your question. Medical journals say the act of falling
Speaker 9: in love releases happy hormones that lower stress levels and
Speaker 9: boost your mood. What is one of those hormones called?
Speaker 9: Is it a oxycodone, b oxytocin, or c oxy clean?
Speaker 4: Okay, well, I don't know. I want medical terms, but
Speaker 4: I know it's not oxy clean.
Speaker 3: Okay, sure you don't want to try pop in some oxy.
Speaker 2: Clean in less stress?
Speaker 9: That always do that, Billy, I don't know.
Speaker 4: Oxytosis hypnosis hypnotized because your love let her cooked oxytocin.
Speaker 3: Jake, Alexis said oxytocin. Somehow, She's right.
Speaker 9: Done there, Jose, it's your turn over. The roughly five
Speaker 9: thousand species of mammal on this planet most like to
Speaker 9: triple dip, meaning they aren't monogamous. I'm winking for our
Speaker 9: radio listeners.
Speaker 3: Okay, but one of these.
Speaker 9: Mammals are monogamous. Is it beavers, crocodiles, or dolphins.
Speaker 2: You can eliminate one just by the mammals word crocodile.
Speaker 3: Are you asking?
Speaker 7: Everyone's like shock that I knew the answer. Man.
Speaker 1: I feel like dolphins are just warning. They're always just
Speaker 1: jumping in and out of the water.
Speaker 9: And you know what I'm saying, I love.
Speaker 2: I spent way too much time with the Animal Planet.
Speaker 3: J just goes to sea World and it's, oh, yeah, they're.
Speaker 1: Just super miscuous for me, Jake, I'm gonna go with
Speaker 1: a good old fashioned beaver.
Speaker 9: Jose, a fan of the Splash Zone, said beavers that
Speaker 9: is correct. Genetic monogamy lowers their risk of parasite transmission.
Speaker 9: It's a good rule for humans as well.
Speaker 2: It's a good rule.
Speaker 9: Scientists that you see. Davis found that what happens when
Speaker 9: couples stare into each other's eyes for a prolonged time
Speaker 9: is it a hair growth speeds up as hormones flood
Speaker 9: your body, be your heart rates sync up because of
Speaker 9: an emotional connection. Or see both tongues in large and
Speaker 9: get two centimeters longer in anticipation of physical connection.
Speaker 2: Picture like a laborator.
Speaker 7: At the hair growth.
Speaker 5: Thing like Michael, stop looking at me, might just shave
Speaker 5: my legs. I wanted to be the heartbeat because I
Speaker 5: think that's really sweet.
Speaker 9: I didn't know a heartbeat should be, Brook said, heartbeat,
Speaker 9: that is correct. We've gone three for three, Jeffrey. If
Speaker 9: you get this right, I will be getting shot.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Someone on the text board who's every day begging for
Speaker 1: Jake to get SHOT's been months since he was.
Speaker 3: Shocked, Jeffrey.
Speaker 9: Researchers finally completed a year's long study and found that
Speaker 9: falling in love does not take as long as we think.
Speaker 9: It only takes how many minutes for that to happen?
Speaker 9: Is it two? Four or six minutes?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 7: Wow? Imagine being six minutes is an.
Speaker 2: Well, they don't talk about how fast it is to
Speaker 2: fall out of love. I think I think it's quick.
Speaker 7: In love pheromone total contact.
Speaker 3: So in this, being like a minute, man is almost
Speaker 3: like a good thing.
Speaker 10: In this.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's romantic.
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, yeah, I don't think that's what you call
Speaker 2: falling in love. Jeff Okay, world, proud of your time.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm going to go as low as possible. Two
Speaker 3: minutes to fall in love, Jeffrey said, two minutes.
Speaker 9: That is, it's proven that you can fall in love
Speaker 9: in as few as four minutes, and that's why scientists
Speaker 9: say you must pay attention to your body language and
Speaker 9: presence when you first meet someone.
Speaker 3: Well, unfortunately didn't get it right. So I'm gonna be
Speaker 3: taking the shot somebody wanted to hear in the club
Speaker 3: by fifty cent go shouty, it's your birthday. We go
Speaker 3: pody like it's your birthday. We going super coddy like
Speaker 3: it's your birthday. And you know, we don't give up.
Speaker 3: It's like your boss, it's your shot. Colling question of
Speaker 3: the day.
Speaker 2: That's pretty good.
Speaker 10: I like that freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: Why is it when you do almost any activity here,
Speaker 3: it all seems kind of ick, low class, But then
Speaker 3: you do the same exact things in a foreign country,
Speaker 3: Suddenly it's sophisticated and chic. You know, like riding public
Speaker 3: transportation here, nobody wants to be doing that, but riding
Speaker 3: the public transport over in England they call their subway
Speaker 3: the tube gap. The gap barely even notice the smell
Speaker 3: of urine over here. Or what about when you're walking
Speaker 3: down the street drunk, puking into trash cans at five
Speaker 3: am over here, your sus But stumbling down the streets
Speaker 3: at five am in Spain eating pie off of the floor,
Speaker 3: You're the life of the party.
Speaker 2: Is that they do.
Speaker 3: That's literally.
Speaker 2: I love Barcelona.
Speaker 3: So while you might think this next segment is kind
Speaker 3: of dumb and low class, just pretend that we're all
Speaker 3: in a Parisian cafe ordering croissants. We are classy. Now
Speaker 3: for a brand new edition of What's on Your Mind,
Speaker 3: it's coming.
Speaker 10: Up Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: Why do we have an irrational hatred towards people who
Speaker 3: are doing the speed limit?
Speaker 7: You're so right?
Speaker 3: Please law abiding, safety conscious travelers. Yeah, sixty disgusting.
Speaker 2: I'm with you.
Speaker 3: On this show. We do eighty miles an hours through
Speaker 3: a school zone with our eyes closed. You won't ask
Speaker 3: each other what's on your mind?
Speaker 8: Okay, we're going to start things off with Brook Brook flooring,
Speaker 8: what's on your mind?
Speaker 11: Do you know?
Speaker 2: Interesting intro there?
Speaker 5: Because I just did an eight hour car trip with
Speaker 5: my family.
Speaker 2: Oh, that is all that's on my mind.
Speaker 5: Because you would think in that eight hour time period
Speaker 5: that it would be my two young children that would
Speaker 5: drive me nuts.
Speaker 2: It is definitely my husband.
Speaker 3: Oh what was he doing?
Speaker 5: He is the worst passenger, you know if you listen, well,
Speaker 5: we should take turns and when it's his turn to.
Speaker 2: Co pilot, you know, as a co pilot. You have
Speaker 2: two jobs. Okay, One navigate navigators.
Speaker 5: He's terrible at it. He will tell me to turn
Speaker 5: about three blocks past where I.
Speaker 2: Was supposed to turn.
Speaker 3: Okay. Two is to hold a conversation.
Speaker 2: Be the entertainment, you know, make the time pass. This
Speaker 2: man will go hours without talking. He doesn't want to
Speaker 2: listen to music. Yes, he'll sleep.
Speaker 5: I'll start to bring something up and he's like, I
Speaker 5: don't know, we could talk about it later.
Speaker 4: Like this, this is a good time.
Speaker 3: In his defense, some time you've been together for like
Speaker 3: what thirteen years or something like that, it's always been.
Speaker 2: This way, though, Jeffrey, it is his turn to drive.
Speaker 2: He will turn the music off.
Speaker 4: He will drive.
Speaker 2: He is like what madman. Can drive for hours in
Speaker 2: silence without.
Speaker 8: Honestly, maybe like an hour, and then after that you
Speaker 8: gotta have something.
Speaker 3: I feel like him talking just opens it up to
Speaker 3: being criticized though, no matter.
Speaker 2: I love talking to him.
Speaker 3: I love having him.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you stop it.
Speaker 2: Could you saw one of your kids?
Speaker 5: The kids aren't big enough to sit in the front seat,
Speaker 5: but I'll tell you as soon as they are.
Speaker 10: He's get.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sorry for your quiet, peaceful driver. From what's
Speaker 3: been on your mind?
Speaker 1: Well, I ordered some food delivery over the weekend and
Speaker 1: I went down to my lobby to go pick it up,
Speaker 1: and the apartment manager of the whole building.
Speaker 2: Yeah, down there like a celebrity.
Speaker 7: Yeah she's amazing. Probably shout to Marie.
Speaker 3: I love her. And she holds the door for me.
Speaker 3: She saw that I was just going down quick. Yeah food.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, oh, thank you, sorry, run back in
Speaker 1: the elevator and are talking. We're catching up, yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: yeah right, and then she just stops.
Speaker 2: She stops talking.
Speaker 7: Yeah, like I don't know.
Speaker 3: We're like awkwardly like, oh god, it's like Brooks car ride.
Speaker 7: Maybe I wasn't talking enough.
Speaker 2: Except for your elevator's only what thirty seconds?
Speaker 6: Yeah, we're only going up six floors, right, So she
Speaker 6: moves closer to the door, like know when you're waiting
Speaker 6: for it to get out, and it's like right in
Speaker 6: front of your face. There's like it was only like
Speaker 6: five or six seconds, but it's a long five seconds, Like, wow.
Speaker 7: Something happened.
Speaker 2: Did you say something to insult?
Speaker 1: I know I didn't at all. Like we're having a
Speaker 1: genuinely nice conversation. So I go inside I put my
Speaker 1: food down whatever, and I realized I look in the mirror.
Speaker 1: My pants are completely soaked in the front because before
Speaker 1: I went and got my food, I washed my coffee
Speaker 1: mugg and it splashed all over me, and then my
Speaker 1: deliveries here didn't think twice, so it looked like I.
Speaker 7: Peed my pants the entire.
Speaker 1: Right And I think she finally looked down and was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, she's just pea pants and walking around like.
Speaker 3: She didn't say anything.
Speaker 4: Do you know she didn't She would be like.
Speaker 3: Hey, I think you over there, buddy.
Speaker 7: She looked horrified for me. That explains why is like,
Speaker 7: get me on the yellow are.
Speaker 2: Could you be a person who didn't realize that they
Speaker 2: wet themselves.
Speaker 3: It'd be nice if someone gave you a heads up,
Speaker 3: the little warning of what's going on with your own
Speaker 3: body pants.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but it looked like my pants.
Speaker 3: As what's been on your mind.
Speaker 4: Okay, so everybody jokes that gets for old people.
Speaker 10: You know.
Speaker 4: I'm talking about pickleball.
Speaker 2: Okay, I've never even played.
Speaker 4: It is actually so hard. Okay, I haven't been able
Speaker 4: to walk for like three days now because I am
Speaker 4: so sore from playing pickleball. Eighty five year old. I
Speaker 4: know I don't get it, and I do track everything,
Speaker 4: and I am in so much pain lately, like even
Speaker 4: to this day an athlete, and I haven't even made
Speaker 4: it to the real court. I'm staying on the tennis
Speaker 4: courts with my friends because I'm too intimidated by the
Speaker 4: actual pickle pickleball. I'm working my way too, but now
Speaker 4: I know I've been set back. I haven't been able
Speaker 4: to play for days. I've had to sit out.
Speaker 2: You have yeah, because you're finally moving sideways. You know
Speaker 2: she's a runner. She only moves straight. Now she's having.
Speaker 5: I don't know, take so I want to give some
Speaker 5: respect to.
Speaker 2: A four minute mile, but she can't play a full game.
Speaker 2: One day.
Speaker 4: I make it to play the eighty five year olds,
Speaker 4: but it's not looking good.
Speaker 5: Guys on my journey, Jeffrey, what's on your mind?
Speaker 3: Sometimes life gives you a reality check or just a
Speaker 3: clear sign that you're getting older.
Speaker 2: Oh is that what just happened to?
Speaker 7: A lesson.
Speaker 2: Himself? Which one do you want to choose?
Speaker 3: So many like in the past, I've had moments where
Speaker 3: I've slept kind of weird and you wake up with
Speaker 3: next siftness.
Speaker 5: I did not find the right pillow anyone has a
Speaker 5: pillow tip.
Speaker 3: One time I sneezed really hard and I threw my
Speaker 3: back out. Yeah, I've been there, done that, But I
Speaker 3: had a new one recently, a way more embarrassing one
Speaker 3: because the other day I was drinking an orange fantaka
Speaker 3: enjoying it, probably a little bit too much. I guess
Speaker 3: I got cocky and I took a gulp that was
Speaker 3: kind of.
Speaker 8: Big, too big for this throat to handle. As soon
Speaker 8: as I swallowed, I jolted up and my whole shoulder
Speaker 8: went numb.
Speaker 2: From swallowing.
Speaker 3: I couldn't explain it, but couldn't turn my head, could
Speaker 3: barely look to the right. After that, standing up and
Speaker 3: sitting down became problematic for an entire week because I
Speaker 3: swallowed weird. No, that's the worst, you guys know. I
Speaker 3: am not new to swallowing injuries, but this one was
Speaker 3: definitely the worst.
Speaker 2: Maby do you call it doctor about that or you
Speaker 2: just don't?
Speaker 3: Absolutely not. It's way too embarrassing. I'm embarrassed even admitted
Speaker 3: on the radio right now, but it really happened. Thank goodness,
Speaker 3: my body is finally on the men and I can
Speaker 3: like look to my right now.
Speaker 2: Wow, good thing. We all sit to your left.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but next time a Fanta orange comes near these lips,
Speaker 3: uh huh, I'm you'd be thinking twice getting my neck
Speaker 3: brace ready.
Speaker 2: Maybe maybe use a straw.
Speaker 3: That's a good so getting up there in age.
Speaker 10: Wow.
Speaker 3: Text in seven eight five nine two, tell us what's
Speaker 3: been your mind? It's brooking Jeffrey in the morning. I
Speaker 3: got a texta sevent eight five nine two that says,
Speaker 3: good morning. I listen to you guys every morning on
Speaker 3: the way to work your segments. Feels like I'm sitting
Speaker 3: in a room with my friends you just chatting and laughing.
Speaker 3: Great start to my days. Say good morning.
Speaker 2: Share share share, Oh my god, does.
Speaker 3: Share v share?
Speaker 12: Wow?
Speaker 2: You should have read it in a share voice.
Speaker 3: Yeah. The other text says, Alexis is pretty funny in
Speaker 3: her phone taps, but maybe relax a little and act
Speaker 3: natural and don't be so nervous and awkward the whole time.
Speaker 4: Anyways, everything love you with all that.
Speaker 2: Honestly, you feel.
Speaker 5: Like it's not really a compliment when it's followed by
Speaker 5: a butt that's longer than the compliments.
Speaker 7: Of corrections.
Speaker 3: She's rooting for you though, all right. Another one says,
Speaker 3: as a parent, it's my to mess with my kids.
Speaker 3: I keep telling my eight year old to download Wi
Speaker 3: Fi for road trips. He's been trying for a week
Speaker 3: to figure out out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's not going to become a computer science tist.
Speaker 3: Keep your text coming. In seven five nine two, tell
Speaker 3: us what's been on your mind?
Speaker 10: Frooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: They say one person's trash is another person's treasure. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and that also applies to the dating world in some way. Okay,
Speaker 3: think about that weird guy you ghosted after you know
Speaker 3: a few months the one who burps sold out at
Speaker 3: the restaurant had set off the fire alarm, and then
Speaker 3: when he coughed, three teeth came up and they weren't
Speaker 3: even his.
Speaker 2: They weren't his.
Speaker 3: Thing is you dodged that bullet and that tooth? Apparently,
Speaker 3: But did you ever wonder who tried dating that guy
Speaker 3: after me? And what person had it after that? Meaning
Speaker 3: of those women might be on the phone right now. Oh,
Speaker 3: and they had an even worse experience than you did.
Speaker 10: I don't know.
Speaker 3: And find out if maybe some of your old mistakes
Speaker 3: made the cut In a Battle of the Tender Dates.
Speaker 3: That's happening at seven ten.
Speaker 10: Two Hopeless one dating app Then there's you swipe right.
Speaker 10: The question is whose love life is more tragic?
Speaker 3: It's Battle of the Tender Dates. It is the dating
Speaker 3: game show that encourages you to spay and neuter your kids.
Speaker 3: Oh sure, it's a wildly unpopular message, but we are
Speaker 3: sticking to it with Battle of the Tender Dates, where
Speaker 3: two of our listeners go head to head to figure
Speaker 3: out whose dating life is the most tragic. We'll explain
Speaker 3: the rules in just a second. First, let's meet today's contestants.
Speaker 3: In this corner, she's had cosmetic work done on her
Speaker 3: dairy air and told the surgeon, I don't want two
Speaker 3: giant cheeks, I want ten medium sized ones. That's why
Speaker 3: at the cleve she's known as Juicy Lucy.
Speaker 5: Ya really a bubble butt, like lots of bubbles.
Speaker 2: That's what I'm picturing when you go on runs.
Speaker 7: Does it sound like a round of a block?
Speaker 5: Yes.
Speaker 3: And in the other corner, her two favorite things to
Speaker 3: do on a date are long romantic walks down the
Speaker 3: beach and watching you through the window as you sleep.
Speaker 3: That's how she got the nickname starin Aarin's all.
Speaker 5: He's better at night when they got the lights on inside,
Speaker 5: easier through the window.
Speaker 3: She's used to staying quiet so she doesn't wake them up.
Speaker 12: That's fine.
Speaker 3: But here's how the game works. One contestant will start
Speaker 3: by telling one of their worst dating stories. The other
Speaker 3: will try and counter with the nightmare story of their own.
Speaker 3: We're going back and forth for three rounds here until
Speaker 3: we declare a winner. We're gonna start things off with
Speaker 3: juicy Lucy.
Speaker 13: So a guy took me to all of Guard him okay,
Speaker 13: and so when the waitress was talking to us, he
Speaker 13: started mimicking everything she said back to her and hide
Speaker 13: the choice.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 13: Yeah, it was very immature. She kept talking and I
Speaker 13: kicked him under the table to just stop, and he
Speaker 13: just looked at me and said, we're all families, so
Speaker 13: I'm going to act like it.
Speaker 3: Oh think that was hot? Okay? Okay.
Speaker 14: A guy invited me to his house to use his pool.
Speaker 2: That's fun.
Speaker 1: Fun.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 14: So we're at its place, swimming around. When he told
Speaker 14: me he'd be right back, he had to go to
Speaker 14: the bathroom. Okay, but instead of getting out, he swam
Speaker 14: like two strokes away from me and then swam back over.
Speaker 4: My god, did you jump out of the pool.
Speaker 2: That's so gross.
Speaker 14: Yep, yep that happened.
Speaker 3: I can't believe Brookes said that was gross.
Speaker 2: Right, No pe in a lake, pee in the ocean.
Speaker 2: Do not pee in a pool.
Speaker 3: Around to Lucy. We're back to you.
Speaker 13: So a guy came with me to a soul cycle class.
Speaker 13: There were no other men there, only by left were
Speaker 13: in the front row.
Speaker 2: Yes, any exercise class and you show up to late,
Speaker 2: You're like.
Speaker 3: Oh no, Well, if you're actually good at cycling, then problem.
Speaker 13: So we begin and he's grunting through the entire class.
Speaker 13: It was so loud no one could even hear the music.
Speaker 13: Then he was sweating so much he took off all
Speaker 13: of his clothes.
Speaker 3: And did you say where this soul cycle class?
Speaker 13: It was too much soul?
Speaker 3: Aaron, you got to hit.
Speaker 14: Back, Okay. I went to a bar with a guy
Speaker 14: and afterwards we were like super hungry and all that
Speaker 14: was open was McDonald's. Okay, so we ordered happy meals.
Speaker 14: You know, he could have been funny, and so he
Speaker 14: got so mad that I got a better toy than that.
Speaker 2: Do you just date all little brothers.
Speaker 7: I know, I feel.
Speaker 3: Like I'm your.
Speaker 14: He like legits hounded about it on the way home.
Speaker 14: Then he made the upers stop at two more McDonald's
Speaker 14: so he could try to get the same.
Speaker 5: Oh, I appreciate that you didn't give him your toy.
Speaker 14: Yeah, yeah, no, I did not give him my toy, he.
Speaker 3: Said to the third and final round. That means, ladies,
Speaker 3: we need your best stories here. Lucy, what have you
Speaker 3: got for us?
Speaker 13: So a guy and I did a cooking class together
Speaker 13: and it was fun, and you were being kind of
Speaker 13: touchy feely, and then he starts making our appetizer and
Speaker 13: I thought it would be funny to talk to him
Speaker 13: like Gordon Ramsey.
Speaker 2: Could, but it could be pretty harsh.
Speaker 3: How did that go for you?
Speaker 13: Well, so, in my worst British accent, I said, this
Speaker 13: is bloody horrible.
Speaker 11: My grand can do better than that, And all.
Speaker 13: Of a sudden he looks at me and starts crying, Oh.
Speaker 2: Wait, it sounds like your British accent was better than
Speaker 2: you expected.
Speaker 13: So and the instructure came over and my date said
Speaker 13: I was being mean and bullying, so I was asked
Speaker 13: to leave.
Speaker 7: You got kicked out.
Speaker 3: We don't need any negativity in our cooking, last our kitchen, Aaron,
Speaker 3: this is your last shot.
Speaker 10: Go.
Speaker 14: I was with a guy back at his place and
Speaker 14: Netflix and chill situation, you know what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3: Very nice.
Speaker 14: And when once we stopped the movie to move to
Speaker 14: the bedroom, I hear someone or like some sound in
Speaker 14: the background. So I asked, this phone was playing music?
Speaker 14: And he looked at me and said, no, it's just
Speaker 14: my mom. Yeah, And I'm like, what are you talking about?
Speaker 14: And he picks up his phone and apologizes. Turns out
Speaker 14: he hadn't hung out with his mom in a week,
Speaker 14: so he missed her and asked if she wanted to
Speaker 14: listen to the movie with her insane.
Speaker 3: Hey mom, we're about to make out, so you want
Speaker 3: me to let you go or you want to stay
Speaker 3: on the phone. All right, that's the final bell that
Speaker 3: means the match has come to an end. Judges, we
Speaker 3: got to score this. Alexis who wins.
Speaker 4: I'm going to erin for the guy who Pete in
Speaker 4: the pool.
Speaker 3: With you go, I can vote for staring Aaron Broke.
Speaker 2: I thought it couldn't get grosser until the mom listening in.
Speaker 3: Erin for sure, starin Aaron, We are both mesmerized and
Speaker 3: horrified by your love life. Congrats right here, that was
Speaker 3: battle of the tender dates. We got your phone tap, got.
Speaker 10: Up your guest Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: Do you ever wonder when you're talking to someone on
Speaker 3: a customer service call, like, yeah, sure they're taking down
Speaker 3: whatever complainer issue might have, but what else are they doing?
Speaker 5: Oh, I mean not paying attention to what I'm saying.
Speaker 3: Probably, well, whatever you're picturing in your mind right now,
Speaker 3: it's probably not as bad as what I'm thinking. Or
Speaker 3: is it.
Speaker 2: No, it wasn't. It definitely wasn't.
Speaker 3: Because today we call a woman who had a problem
Speaker 3: with her vacuum, and the difference between that and this
Speaker 3: phone tap is that well, I mean, I guess there's
Speaker 3: no difference.
Speaker 12: They both suck.
Speaker 3: Well they should be sucking her is So we mess
Speaker 3: with her in your phone tap right now? Hello, Hi,
Speaker 3: is this Kayla?
Speaker 11: This is her Kila.
Speaker 3: My name is Stuart. I'm with I'm responding to your
Speaker 3: email about a defective vacuum cleaner.
Speaker 15: Oh, yes, thank you so much for reaching out.
Speaker 3: Yeah, of course. Yeah, So what's going on?
Speaker 15: So I got this vacuum about a month ago and
Speaker 15: It was working fine for the first couple of weeks,
Speaker 15: but then it just kind of stopped sucking stuff up.
Speaker 15: So I took it into the store and I did
Speaker 15: speak to someone there and they said it was past
Speaker 15: the warrant, which I thought was a little weird.
Speaker 3: Excuse me, I'm sorry. What?
Speaker 15: Oh No, I just thought I heard something. Are you
Speaker 15: still there?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I didn't hear anything.
Speaker 12: Okay, you heard something?
Speaker 15: Yeah, I thought I did.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know. Do you remember the associate that you
Speaker 3: were speaking with when you went in?
Speaker 15: Yeah? I think his name was Gavin. He was like
Speaker 15: a tall guy, really nice. But did you just shush me?
Speaker 12: I think I did that.
Speaker 15: Really, that's kind of rude.
Speaker 3: I agree. I am so sorry. I apologize. I swear
Speaker 3: I did not know I was doing that.
Speaker 15: You didn't know like you made a noise.
Speaker 3: Let me explain. I've just I've been binging the new
Speaker 3: season of Bridgerton on Netflix because I didn't finish it
Speaker 3: at home, so I've just been watching it on my
Speaker 3: iPad here with one of my AirPods in, but I'm
Speaker 3: still listening.
Speaker 11: Unbelievable.
Speaker 3: So yeah, I just I must have shushed you as
Speaker 3: like a reflex.
Speaker 15: So you're watching a movie while taking down my complaint.
Speaker 3: Well, no, it's not a movie, it's a series. It's
Speaker 3: pretty amazing one actually, And just right now I'm fixated
Speaker 3: on Lady dan Berry.
Speaker 12: She is just amazing. I can't, I can't look away.
Speaker 15: That's relevant. You're watching a movie when you're supposed to
Speaker 15: be helping me TV show.
Speaker 12: Yeah whatever, I told you that already.
Speaker 15: It doesn't matter. That is so unprofessional.
Speaker 3: Okay, man, you're you're right. It was not very Lady
Speaker 3: dan Berry of me. So I'm gonna put this away.
Speaker 3: What were you saying? Your microwave light wasn't working.
Speaker 15: It's my vacuum. Were you even listening?
Speaker 3: Oh yes, sorry, right, the vacuum, and you were complaining
Speaker 3: to one of the associates, Becky.
Speaker 11: His name was Gavin.
Speaker 15: Are you listening to anything that I said?
Speaker 12: Uh huh, oh my god, it's so beautiful?
Speaker 15: Are you watching the stupid show again? Right now?
Speaker 11: Why aren't you say anything?
Speaker 15: Are you here? Are you listening? My vacuum doesn't work.
Speaker 15: I'm told that you pass warranty.
Speaker 11: If you fish me again, I'm gonna get your manager
Speaker 11: on the phone and I'm.
Speaker 15: Get you fired.
Speaker 3: Lady Maria Crane just walked in, and you will not
Speaker 3: believe the side of her umbrella.
Speaker 15: I am not dealing with this today.
Speaker 3: I am not Prudence Featherton. Oh she was the one
Speaker 3: at the Apple Press.
Speaker 15: Are you serious right now?
Speaker 3: I did not see that coming.
Speaker 15: I don't want to hear anymore.
Speaker 3: Oh my god. When you come in to exchange your
Speaker 3: broken TV, you need to vacuum.
Speaker 11: Oh my gosh, vacuum right Disney your manager right now.
Speaker 3: See, I actually can't do that, But what I can
Speaker 3: do is tell you that your sister Phoebe knows all
Speaker 3: about your vacuum problems, and that's why she sets you
Speaker 3: up for this phone tap. What it's just a prank.
Speaker 3: I'm serious. My name is jeff from the radio show
Speaker 3: Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. Phoebe's the one who
Speaker 3: set you up for this prank phone call.
Speaker 15: She knows how annoyed I've been about this stupid vacuum.
Speaker 3: Lady Dan Prae just came back.
Speaker 12: She looks stunning too soon.
Speaker 14: I don't care if it was a joke.
Speaker 15: You don't shush me.
Speaker 3: But she's in a gilded carriage. What am I supposed
Speaker 3: to do?
Speaker 15: Oh my god?
Speaker 10: Wake up every morning weekday morning Brook and Jeffrey in
Speaker 10: the morning.
Speaker 3: Nothing is hotter than matching with someone on a dating
Speaker 3: app who says, I'm.
Speaker 12: Only in town for one night, let's hang out.
Speaker 3: Oh dang, that's right.
Speaker 2: To the point is that do read it out loud
Speaker 2: to yourself and you said.
Speaker 3: As well, always because you know that.
Speaker 12: Means it is on.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that happened to me one time?
Speaker 7: Did it?
Speaker 3: Until I realized it was just my mom cat fishing me,
Speaker 3: trying to get me to spend time with her. Oh disturbing,
Speaker 3: Jeffy cool, That situation did happen to one of our
Speaker 3: listeners recently. He met up with a woman who was
Speaker 3: only in town for one night, and he admits some
Speaker 3: weird stuff happens. Not the good kind of weird stuff either,
Speaker 3: legit weird. We're gonna try and save it for him
Speaker 3: in a brand new Second Date Update, Next Second Date Updated.
Speaker 3: You've ever been out with someone and thought, what am
Speaker 3: I doing? They are way out of my league? I
Speaker 3: don't think no, I've got some liars in the room,
Speaker 3: because everybody's felt that. But have you ever had your
Speaker 3: own mother tell you, sorry, honey, that girl is way out.
Speaker 12: Of your leaves?
Speaker 3: You should give up and save yourself the embarrassment.
Speaker 7: My mom thinks I'm the most handsome man of the world.
Speaker 1: There's no way.
Speaker 3: Again, another good liar there, But that's what happened to
Speaker 3: one of our listeners, Alex. His own mom doesn't believe
Speaker 3: that he's got game.
Speaker 5: I mean, you relate to this so heavily, don't you, Jeffrey.
Speaker 3: I do. But Alex proved her wrong by hanging out
Speaker 3: with a solid seven according to him, and getting a
Speaker 3: cheap hotel room with her. Alex, am I right, or
Speaker 3: with some of what I said exaggerated for entertainment?
Speaker 16: Well, technically it wasn't my hotel. I mean it was
Speaker 16: it was hers, but yeah.
Speaker 3: Okay, make her pay for it. That's right.
Speaker 4: At the hotel room.
Speaker 17: Yeah, she was out of town, so it was a
Speaker 17: business hoteler.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, Jeffery, you painted it. Yes, that was exaggerated
Speaker 2: for entertainment purposes.
Speaker 3: Okay, I was hoping that that is perfectly accurate. But
Speaker 3: why don't you start from the beginning. Tell us about
Speaker 3: this girl you met?
Speaker 16: Well, you said solid seven.
Speaker 17: I agree, but you know thought she was really beautiful.
Speaker 2: And does she have it? Wait, does she have a name?
Speaker 17: Yeah, her name is Tiffany.
Speaker 2: Okay, how'd you meet her?
Speaker 17: So we went on a dating app.
Speaker 16: We're just swiping, and I guess she was looking for
Speaker 16: something because she came from out of town.
Speaker 5: If you're like coming in from out of town and
Speaker 5: you're getting on Tinder, are you just bored?
Speaker 2: Are you looking for.
Speaker 3: A one night like, well, let's not sell our man
Speaker 3: short that like she just matched with him because she
Speaker 3: was bored looking to kill time. I think I think
Speaker 3: she saw something that she liked on that dating pre Yeah.
Speaker 16: I mean that's what Yeah, that's what I'm going for.
Speaker 16: You know, I post a lot of like shirtless picks
Speaker 16: and stuff. So if anyone comes out from out of
Speaker 16: town and they know what they're getting into, Wow, I
Speaker 16: think that.
Speaker 2: She definitely was only looking for what thing.
Speaker 5: If she swiped right on a shirtless dude and she's
Speaker 5: in town for one night, like kind of goes together.
Speaker 3: How did the date go?
Speaker 16: It was going it was going great or having a
Speaker 16: good time at first?
Speaker 5: Where did you guys meet just like at her hotel,
Speaker 5: like at the bar?
Speaker 16: Yeah, just kind of like at the bar across the
Speaker 16: street kind of thing. Okay, I thought it was going well,
Speaker 16: because she did. Eventually she took me to her hotel room.
Speaker 16: Oh yeah, not much, not much to do there.
Speaker 2: I think I think he's being sarcastic.
Speaker 9: I'm not.
Speaker 17: I'm not being sarcastic. There's not a lot of stuff
Speaker 17: to do in a hotel room.
Speaker 7: To do the last thing?
Speaker 3: Okay, doing there? Watch TV?
Speaker 7: Yeah, doing any these?
Speaker 2: Wait, why did you go to the hotel room? Then?
Speaker 7: Please don't tell me to.
Speaker 16: Iron No, I mean I thought things were picking up
Speaker 16: at that things were getting just about to heat up,
Speaker 16: and I was curious to see what the decor in
Speaker 16: her hotel room looked like.
Speaker 3: Oh I didn't tell what.
Speaker 2: To sarcasm and is what is not?
Speaker 7: He's serious?
Speaker 16: But yeah, I mean I thought it was going well
Speaker 16: and then she I think she tried to ditch.
Speaker 2: Me though, Wait in the room or where are you at?
Speaker 3: She pushed you out of the.
Speaker 7: Elevator and then shut the door.
Speaker 16: We made it to the room, I checked out the decor,
Speaker 16: and then she left me for four hours in the room. Yeah,
Speaker 16: son bought. I think she wanted me to go with her.
Speaker 16: She was going to go see a friend, but she
Speaker 16: made it seem like it was going to be real quick.
Speaker 17: Like just to say hi. So I was like, oh,
Speaker 17: I'll just stay.
Speaker 3: So she left you in her hotel room to go
Speaker 3: meet up with a friend real quick and then say she.
Speaker 17: Was going to be back exactly.
Speaker 16: She asked me to come with her a couple of times,
Speaker 16: but I was like, no, I'll just chill here. You
Speaker 16: say hi, and I'll be ready when you're back.
Speaker 5: So you you stayed for four hours, you're committed.
Speaker 17: I mean she texted me a couple of times.
Speaker 16: I was like, hey, what's going on, you know, and
Speaker 16: she said, no, I'm sorry, I want.
Speaker 17: To I'll be back soon. She wants texting me, okay.
Speaker 2: And she never once asked you to leave.
Speaker 17: No, she didn't ask me to leave.
Speaker 16: She did say like, if you want to leave, you can, okay.
Speaker 3: So you didn't take that as like a hint that
Speaker 3: maybe you should go.
Speaker 16: No, I mean, I don't know why I made his
Speaker 16: hotel room.
Speaker 17: I'm going to stay.
Speaker 16: I'm going to wait it out, just wait for her
Speaker 16: to come back.
Speaker 1: She is listen the fact that she invited him, like, hey,
Speaker 1: come with.
Speaker 4: Me, of the room, out of the room.
Speaker 5: She wanted him gone, and then she was gone for
Speaker 5: four hours, just in hopes that he would actually be gone.
Speaker 3: The she s his hunky, shirtless body and was intimidated
Speaker 3: and was like, I need some more liquid courage in
Speaker 3: order to deal with this hunk of a man.
Speaker 2: What did she say? Did she say that when she
Speaker 2: came back into the hotel room now.
Speaker 17: With those words?
Speaker 16: No, she uh, you know, it was about midnight at
Speaker 16: that point. She got back, and at first she was
Speaker 16: apologizing and she's like, oh, my friend, you know, we're
Speaker 16: just catching up.
Speaker 17: We had to talk like okay, yeah, no.
Speaker 16: Worries, and then she finally was like, well, I have
Speaker 16: an early meeting and yeah, I think I finally got
Speaker 16: the hint at that point.
Speaker 3: Oh, that's when you got the hints. Yeah, So how
Speaker 3: did you leave it?
Speaker 16: I just said, oh, yeah, no worries, and uh kind
Speaker 16: of left.
Speaker 17: But I feel like.
Speaker 16: We had a good time before that, you know, her friend.
Speaker 17: Kind of got on the way.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so wait, what do you what do you want? Like,
Speaker 2: you want to go out with her again?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 17: I want to go out with her. I made it
Speaker 17: to the hotel room.
Speaker 16: That's the only time I've ever been invited to a
Speaker 16: hotel room because you see the decorse.
Speaker 5: It is kind of a smooth line, though, I dot
Speaker 5: it's sincere Jeffrey.
Speaker 17: She could have said no, I think she realized that.
Speaker 2: Now have you texted or called her? Have you talked
Speaker 2: to Tiffany at all?
Speaker 16: I texted her, I said we should hang out some time.
Speaker 17: Do you have her back? She just said sounds like
Speaker 17: a plan.
Speaker 2: Oh oh yeah, I think that's good. I don't think
Speaker 2: that's good.
Speaker 3: She could have said, no.
Speaker 17: Can I can I confess something?
Speaker 10: You all?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I don't know if I want you to.
Speaker 17: I just there's one thing.
Speaker 16: You know, people always ask like, is there anything that
Speaker 16: could have made it weird? I do sometimes photoshop my pictures.
Speaker 4: Okay, hotel room.
Speaker 3: Let's let's come back and try and get you a
Speaker 3: second date? Outdated right after this hold on second date update. Look,
Speaker 3: we have a listener who has come to us with
Speaker 3: a problem. Yes, he needs our wisdom, our encouragement, and
Speaker 3: what we don't need, Brook, is your condescending signs and
Speaker 3: oh honeys.
Speaker 2: I didn't say Karen.
Speaker 3: Slamming his interest in hotel decor.
Speaker 2: O listen, he called for honesty, a right.
Speaker 3: He did not ask to get another date. You have
Speaker 3: a responsibility, Brook, to our listener. Here we need to
Speaker 3: stand up and be an advocate for the photoshop shirtless
Speaker 3: men of this world. Ye, man of guys would have
Speaker 3: the willpower, the mental fortitude to wait alone in a
Speaker 3: woman's hotel room for four hours after she excused herself, But.
Speaker 7: Alex did, and we need to show him some respect.
Speaker 3: Gosh, darn it. Tell him how impressed you are? I mean, Alex?
Speaker 2: Okay, Alex wanted me there.
Speaker 4: I don't think she did.
Speaker 5: Buddy, But like, I think she was missing an opportunity
Speaker 5: because I think you sound like a nice person.
Speaker 16: Okay, you think you might want to go for a
Speaker 16: second date?
Speaker 3: Yeah, Alex, do you feel supported by Brooks words? There?
Speaker 17: I feel like she's being nice.
Speaker 1: Spot.
Speaker 17: I'm glad she's trying anyways.
Speaker 3: All Right, he knows that you can't do your job,
Speaker 3: but you aren't willing to help him. But he's still
Speaker 3: going to stick through it, just like he's stuck around
Speaker 3: in that girl's hotel room. All right, let's call her
Speaker 3: and try and get you a second date. You ready, Alex?
Speaker 15: I'm ready?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 10: What's doing?
Speaker 11: Hello?
Speaker 3: Hey, we're looking for Tiffany.
Speaker 15: This is she?
Speaker 3: What's up, Tiffany? You're you're on the radio. Right now
Speaker 3: with Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 18: Uh yeah, what what is this about.
Speaker 3: This is about something we do on our show called
Speaker 3: a second Date update, where we try and help our
Speaker 3: listeners reconnect with people that they met up with online
Speaker 3: or went on a date with. And you met up
Speaker 3: with a guy recently named Alex.
Speaker 5: Right, man, I bet it was a memorable night.
Speaker 18: Yeah, you could. You could say that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, sound out pretty fun from our end of
Speaker 3: the conversation. That was our takeaway.
Speaker 5: I mean, I think the first half hour maybe when
Speaker 5: they were actually hanging out.
Speaker 3: There was definitely good moments we've heard.
Speaker 16: Yeah.
Speaker 18: I mean, look, I was just trying to have some fun.
Speaker 18: You know, it was a work trip. I popped on
Speaker 18: the apps, thought maybe we could hang out, have dinner.
Speaker 3: Mission accomplished, Fun achieved.
Speaker 5: Okay, So what did you think when you first saw Alex?
Speaker 18: I could tell pretty quickly that, like, he was a
Speaker 18: nice guy, but we weren't necessarily a good math and
Speaker 18: you know, even like in his pictures, he seemed like
Speaker 18: a kind of nice, wholesome guy. And when we met up,
Speaker 18: he was really nice and I don't know, he seemed
Speaker 18: really interested in my trip and what hotel I was
Speaker 18: staying at.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, he was mentioning that to us and that
Speaker 3: he wanted to see what the decor in your hotel
Speaker 3: looked like.
Speaker 5: And we thought it was like just a line, but
Speaker 5: it sounds like he was truly interested in the passion wholesome.
Speaker 18: Yeah, yeah, it wasn't a line. He like walked into
Speaker 18: the room and was like caressing the curtains, like the
Speaker 18: crown molding was mind blowing.
Speaker 1: Oh that was actually fancy.
Speaker 2: I mean, what were you thinking when he's doing all this?
Speaker 18: I mean I mostly turned on, so just you know,
Speaker 18: when like you take a risk and you say, like
Speaker 18: I was bringing this guy into my hotel room a
Speaker 18: good idea and no, it really seems to be interested
Speaker 18: in this, but it wasn't anyway, It wasn't much really,
Speaker 18: and I was ready for the evening to be over.
Speaker 18: So I said, oh, like, one of my friends is
Speaker 18: also in town, so I'm going to meet up with
Speaker 18: them in the lobby. Do you want to come with?
Speaker 3: And he just said, no, Okay, it's too early to
Speaker 3: be meeting the friends of the people that you're dating.
Speaker 1: On night one, I think I want to get acquainted
Speaker 1: with this crown molding over here.
Speaker 2: What wait, so the friend wasn't made up? The friend
Speaker 2: was real.
Speaker 18: Oh no, the friend was entirely made up.
Speaker 7: Oh okay, you lied to him.
Speaker 3: That's a sweet, innocent man.
Speaker 2: Why would you ask him to go with you then?
Speaker 4: Like what I mean?
Speaker 18: At this point, I was just trying to figure out
Speaker 18: a way to get him to leave the room because
Speaker 18: it didn't feel like he was going to So, you know,
Speaker 18: I thought maybe I'd get in the elevator and I
Speaker 18: jump off or something. I don't I don't know what.
Speaker 15: The solution was off into the.
Speaker 7: Hallway, not like down the elevator shaft.
Speaker 3: So he was. He was in there, he said, for hours,
Speaker 3: and you never came back.
Speaker 18: Yeah, I was trying to figure out what I was
Speaker 18: going to do to get this lighter man out of
Speaker 18: my hotel room, out of your own hotel room.
Speaker 2: And it's not because you felt threatened by him or anything.
Speaker 18: She was never mean, you know, he was was persistent,
Speaker 18: and obviously I made a mistake taking him there, but he,
Speaker 18: you know, was polite when I came back, and he
Speaker 18: didn't make a pass or anything.
Speaker 15: It was just kind of a well overall park.
Speaker 18: In the morning.
Speaker 3: I mean, he's not good at picking up the hints,
Speaker 3: but overall he sounds like a nice guy.
Speaker 12: Yeah.
Speaker 18: I thought that until the next day when I checked
Speaker 18: out of the hotel. What oh yeah. So apparently he
Speaker 18: ordered a movie to the room while I was gone,
Speaker 18: and I was like, well, I didn't watch anything, you know.
Speaker 18: I saw the bill and they said, well it was
Speaker 18: rented at this time to your room, and I looked
Speaker 18: at it and it was I don't even know how
Speaker 18: to describe this movie other than it's titled Flutter Island.
Speaker 17: Flutter Hey, I can I have to say something here now.
Speaker 3: Planet Earth, Butterfly Special, Hold hold on, Tiffany, that that
Speaker 3: was that's Alex. He's been on the other line listening
Speaker 3: this whole time. I wanted to talk to you. But
Speaker 3: what was the name of the movie?
Speaker 18: Flutter Island.
Speaker 3: Like Shutter Island but documentary.
Speaker 2: Why would you do that, Alex?
Speaker 16: First of all, I went down and I paid the
Speaker 16: guy with cash.
Speaker 17: And I told him to take it off the bills.
Speaker 16: So that should have never happened.
Speaker 17: That is, like, I wurst. I would have never made
Speaker 17: you pay for that. That's on the hotel.
Speaker 4: No, gross, dude, you were in her room.
Speaker 3: Anything and there he just watched a movie. We don't
Speaker 3: know what he did.
Speaker 17: I don't want it doesn't happened.
Speaker 16: Nothing happened, and she it wouldn't have happened if she
Speaker 16: hadn't lied to me.
Speaker 3: He was up there for four hours. What else is
Speaker 3: he gonna do?
Speaker 17: Beieve you were taking such a long time, and I thought.
Speaker 16: You know, I thought it maybe helped me get in
Speaker 16: the mood.
Speaker 17: And you know, in case.
Speaker 16: Something did happen, and it didn't. Nothing happened, which is fine.
Speaker 17: And that wasn't even supposed to be on your bill.
Speaker 18: It's not it being on my bill. That is the
Speaker 18: problem here. You get that right.
Speaker 16: What did you want me to do?
Speaker 18: They said it leave.
Speaker 10: Leave.
Speaker 18: It's not your space. Why would you think it's okay
Speaker 18: to rent a movie in the first place.
Speaker 7: Well, he thinks something's gonna happen.
Speaker 2: Though it doesn't.
Speaker 4: It's her room.
Speaker 2: It's not his room. It's her room, her space.
Speaker 7: You invaded it a little different.
Speaker 17: I was invited.
Speaker 16: But yes, oh my god.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a point. And I think he's still interested
Speaker 3: in seeing you one more time, Tiffany, if you're up
Speaker 3: for seeing him again, we would pay for a date
Speaker 3: to go out wherever you live.
Speaker 17: I'll cover the play.
Speaker 16: I just you know, Tiffany, I think we did have
Speaker 16: a good time, and that part of it was weird,
Speaker 16: but I think, you know, communication wise, we'll get better
Speaker 16: at that.
Speaker 17: And we should we should try again.
Speaker 2: How could you be that clueless, Alex?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's called persistence, Brooks.
Speaker 2: It's idioticy, that's not even a word. Dumb this I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 17: Hey, she wasn't even supposed to know about that. It
Speaker 17: was I asked the guy to pay. I paid him
Speaker 17: with cash.
Speaker 16: Where does that go? You have to we should make
Speaker 16: a complaint to the hotel.
Speaker 3: Actually a hotel's fault.
Speaker 4: He did.
Speaker 2: You are not going to ask this question?
Speaker 3: Come on one more chance. Don't let that hotel's mistake
Speaker 3: ruin a shot at love.
Speaker 5: But just saying this time you can invite him into
Speaker 5: your apartment. You could just end up living there.
Speaker 3: Plus, I just googled it. There's a Slutter Island too.
Speaker 3: You guys have to watch that together. We'll pay for Tiffany.
Speaker 18: You know, I think I'd rather sit in a hotel
Speaker 18: lobby for three night street.
Speaker 2: Hey, I don't know that that's clear to Alex. You
Speaker 2: may just need to say.
Speaker 10: No, freaking Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 3: Here's a question for my co host. I want to know,
Speaker 3: did renting the movie sink his ship? Or was it
Speaker 3: the movie choice?
Speaker 2: The movie choice?
Speaker 5: Yeah, jeff it was fully one hundred percent the movie choice.
Speaker 7: He was watching like Minions by himself.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that would have been okay.
Speaker 2: How do you know this? Why are you even asking.
Speaker 3: Seen Slutter Island, Brother, Jeffrey, it's not How can I
Speaker 3: say that it's a bad movie if you've never even.
Speaker 5: Seen because I won't allow myself to even say that
Speaker 5: title out loud.
Speaker 7: What was Martin Orsese's best directly?
Speaker 3: I bet it was almost nominated for an Oscar and
Speaker 3: here we are shaming him for it just off the
Speaker 3: title alone.
Speaker 2: I'm sure starring Matt Damon Ruth.
Speaker 3: Bader Ginsburg documentary, if he had watched that, he would
Speaker 3: have been a freaking hero. I s with him the
Speaker 3: same night, Another Ship Sunk by Slutter Island's Brook and
Speaker 3: Jeffrey in the.
Speaker 10: Morning, Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 3: You ever notice how people have different go to responses
Speaker 3: when you're texting with them, Like that guy who responds
Speaker 3: to every text with a peach emoji, even when he's
Speaker 3: not at the farmer's market. I don't think ever was
Speaker 3: at the farmer's market.
Speaker 5: I don't think I've ever texted that guy.
Speaker 3: He's a fun guy.
Speaker 2: Oh I bet, I bet.
Speaker 3: But A new poll asked people, if someone messages you
Speaker 3: something funny, what's your usual go to response for that
Speaker 3: levels The number one answer, thirty three percent of people
Speaker 3: said it's lol. Yeah, that's the top one I do.
Speaker 2: Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Speaker 7: It's nor all cats.
Speaker 1: Lol is funnier, and then ha ha ha ha if
Speaker 1: you're really making it, I.
Speaker 2: Think that proves that I'm actually laughing. Yeah emoji like
Speaker 2: you're dead.
Speaker 3: Thirty two percent said they text back a laughing face emoji.
Speaker 3: That's the next most popular Yeah. Twelve percent said it's
Speaker 3: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. That one seems
Speaker 3: like kind of rade, like you're laughing at them. That's
Speaker 3: how I laughed.
Speaker 2: You wanted to laugh at me.
Speaker 3: I wanted me to laugh at you the appropriate amount.
Speaker 3: Not now I feel like you're making fun of me.
Speaker 2: Well maybe I am.
Speaker 3: Nine percent said they reply with that's funny.
Speaker 7: See that's my dad does that, and it's not funny.
Speaker 7: It's just like that was funny. Well, no, it sounds
Speaker 7: like it's not.
Speaker 3: Seven percent say their go to response is something different,
Speaker 3: like a skull crossbones, a smiling sunshine, or just a
Speaker 3: moose Emojiose. Maybe that's like a jen alpha thing.
Speaker 4: I don't know, is just a cute emoji.
Speaker 3: Maybe I just like it's interesting. Saying that's funny is
Speaker 3: really popular with guys. Twice as many men use that
Speaker 3: as women do. Meanwhile, women are more likely to use
Speaker 3: a laughing emoji than a guy is.
Speaker 5: If I'm really lame, I'll just haha, you know, like
Speaker 5: where you like hold it down and then you do that, you.
Speaker 7: Just get the reaction.
Speaker 3: As for people sixty five and older, they're far more
Speaker 3: likely to have their go to response as the thumbs
Speaker 3: up emoji.
Speaker 2: So go not funny joke, Well.
Speaker 3: Get ready send us your thumbs your lo o ls,
Speaker 3: and your moose emojis when we do an extra funny
Speaker 3: edition of Laser Stories. Just coming up next, it's the
Speaker 3: radio segment that just reached out to authorities to perform
Speaker 3: a wellness check on celebrity Nick Cannon. It's been over
Speaker 3: three weeks since he's had a new kid. Anything from
Speaker 3: that guy, he's taking a nap.
Speaker 2: Let's be depressed.
Speaker 3: Laser stories where we read weird news stories around the glove,
Speaker 3: just like everyone else does, except we've got a laser
Speaker 3: and there's other trap babies. Just don't this. First laser
Speaker 3: stories out of Trumbull, Connecticut, a fifty six year old
Speaker 3: man named Robert Withington was walking down the street when
Speaker 3: he saw a medium sized bag leaning against the building.
Speaker 3: So he went over to it, looked inside, then casually
Speaker 3: walked away with it.
Speaker 2: Something good in there.
Speaker 1: Man.
Speaker 3: Problem with Robert walking away with this abandoned sack was
Speaker 3: that it was a bank deposit bag. There was five
Speaker 3: thousand dollars cash inside.
Speaker 5: Wait, doesn't it finders keepers, losers, wheepers.
Speaker 2: Isn't that working there?
Speaker 10: No?
Speaker 2: It is it.
Speaker 3: Apparently it was accidentally dropped by an employee of the
Speaker 3: city's tax collector office, and when he went back to
Speaker 3: get it, it was gone. Yeah, so the.
Speaker 2: Well, you're bored at work, okay.
Speaker 3: So police investigated determined that Robert was the one who
Speaker 3: had taken it.
Speaker 2: Dang.
Speaker 3: When they questioned him, he had a perfectly good two
Speaker 3: word reason as to why he took it. He told
Speaker 3: the cops Finders Keepers lawyers. That might work for like
Speaker 3: a twenty dollars bill on the sidewalk, which could have
Speaker 3: been dropped by anybody, But the bag clearly belonged to
Speaker 3: the bank and even had the bank logo printed on.
Speaker 2: Does anybody feel that bad steal it from the bank.
Speaker 2: I mean, like if it was.
Speaker 5: Someone's, like, you know, savings, sure, but like it's a
Speaker 5: tax person.
Speaker 3: It's money business Documents inside that showed the money was
Speaker 3: tax funds from the town. So Robert was charged with larceny.
Speaker 5: Roberts like, show me where you're going to use that
Speaker 5: five thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: I put it to better use.
Speaker 7: I've seen a bottle sitting there for two years.
Speaker 3: He has not been arragned yet, but he says he
Speaker 3: plans to use the same defense in front of the
Speaker 3: Joe Finders Keepers.
Speaker 2: Uh huh.
Speaker 3: We'll see how that works out for keeps. I rest
Speaker 3: my case, he says. The stories out of China, a
Speaker 3: twenty eight year old guy named Ming Lynn was at
Speaker 3: home during a rainstorm when he looked outside and realized
Speaker 3: he never put his bike away. He went out to
Speaker 3: get it, and that's when unfortunately he was struck by lightning.
Speaker 3: Ming says he saw a bright white light before losing
Speaker 3: consciousness and falling to the ground.
Speaker 5: It you go out in rain and you grab a
Speaker 5: big metal, objects are pretty good.
Speaker 7: I did not think of that.
Speaker 3: I was like, what are the odds the way you're
Speaker 3: holding metal. Before he even got to the bike, he
Speaker 3: was struck. And when he came to he saw the
Speaker 3: door of his house was just a few feet away,
Speaker 3: but remembered never got his bicycle, so he started stumbling
Speaker 3: over to it and was promptly struck again by another
Speaker 3: lightning bolt.
Speaker 2: Wait, he lived. We can't laugh if he didn't live.
Speaker 2: Please tell me he lives.
Speaker 3: This point is like a cartoon. His family called for
Speaker 3: an ambulance and he was rushed to the hospital got
Speaker 3: treated for third degree burns on his feet and buttocks.
Speaker 3: But miraculously he'll be okay.
Speaker 5: He burned his But it is like a cartoon, you know,
Speaker 5: like when this smoke comes off their butt they jump
Speaker 5: in the air.
Speaker 3: That's what really happens. It like comes out wherever it
Speaker 3: comes out. And as for the bike, no one ever
Speaker 3: put it away. In fact, the family believes it's cursed,
Speaker 3: and they told men that they would buy him a
Speaker 3: new bike when he gets out, and so as they
Speaker 3: were out bike shopping out inside for Walmart, kidd yeah,
Speaker 3: me says he's never gonna ride a bike again. Yeah,
Speaker 3: oh he never got to.
Speaker 2: I mean, I guess yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, don't don't try, right, Yeah. This next layer story
Speaker 3: is out of trend town. The pumpkins bice latte hit
Speaker 3: Starbucks last week officially. But this is even more exciting.
Speaker 3: Now a totally different orifice can enjoy these fall flavors.
Speaker 3: I say that because pumpkin spice butt wipes are now.
Speaker 2: Are you joking?
Speaker 3: A company called Babies into it laughing? A company called
Speaker 3: Dude Wipes is making them, calling them dumpkin spice wipe.
Speaker 3: Here's a picture of them that's pretty funny.
Speaker 9: Oh my god.
Speaker 5: On the package there's a pumpkin coming out of a
Speaker 5: toilet with like cross eyes.
Speaker 3: According to the description, they're designed to quote keep your
Speaker 3: baby's butt cozy with a pumpkin spice inspired mix of clove, nutmeg,
Speaker 3: and other full sense. It's actually something the company joked
Speaker 3: about doing a few years back, and they posted a
Speaker 3: fake photo of pumpkin spice butt wipes. But I guess
Speaker 3: corporate decided the world was finally ready for the real thing.
Speaker 3: And they also posted a picture of a pumpkin with
Speaker 3: the date nine five twenty three carved into it. So
Speaker 3: we're guessing that's when the the butt wipes are officially
Speaker 3: gonna drop. But you can already buy them. You can
Speaker 3: buy them already on Amazon if you want to get some.
Speaker 4: I can't addicted a PSL at a young age.
Speaker 3: This next Lazer Stories out of Love Headquarters. We've got
Speaker 3: another new dating term. Some say it's a signal romance
Speaker 3: is officially dead.
Speaker 7: Oh wait, it's a dating term.
Speaker 3: Because the name of the term is master dating.
Speaker 2: It's oh stop it. Well, I thought you might like
Speaker 2: really good at dating. That's not what it means.
Speaker 3: It's where you essentially give up on finding a partner
Speaker 3: and just date yourself your Yeah, it encourages you to
Speaker 3: take yourself out on solo dates so you can really
Speaker 3: get to know you. You do all the things you
Speaker 3: would do for a stereotypical romance, but instead of doing
Speaker 3: it for somebody else, Yeah, you do it all for yourself.
Speaker 3: Oh this, I need a night like this.
Speaker 7: I can light some candles, I can.
Speaker 5: Really yeah, absolutely, Okay.
Speaker 3: The next day after your date with yourself. You're encouraged
Speaker 3: to send yourself flowers with a sweet note attached that says,
Speaker 3: had a great time with you, can't wait to see
Speaker 3: you again. Maybe we could take it to the next level.
Speaker 7: My card and myself just says get out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I break it up with you.
Speaker 3: It's over, and then you need to schedule a fancy
Speaker 3: mode of transportation to get yourself to the second date.
Speaker 3: Experts say people are really doing this. Twenty four year
Speaker 3: old named Derek said he prefers master dating to real dating,
Speaker 3: but mostly because it's just saves him a lot of money.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and that's.
Speaker 3: What this guy is doing right now. It's a clip
Speaker 3: of the Turtle master dating himself. But unlike the trend,
Speaker 3: I doubt he's gonna wait till date number two to
Speaker 3: take it to the next level. I think that sound
Speaker 3: means Laser Stories is over for the day. We'll do
Speaker 3: it again, same time.
Speaker 10: A friend Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: Jeremy is a return player to win Brooks Bucks today.
Speaker 3: He is oh in three all time against you Puppies.
Speaker 2: Yes byng.
Speaker 3: He has no kids, but he does have three dogs
Speaker 3: named Calvin, Dakota, and Dex I'll give you a quiz.
Speaker 3: Are they all rescues or homeless people that you've dated
Speaker 3: in your past? Can I go both both?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 3: They are both, I think, Jeremy, Welcome to the show.
Speaker 18: Man, thanks this time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, three dogs is a lot.
Speaker 17: They're all tiny.
Speaker 1: The biggest ones like fifteen downs.
Speaker 5: Okay, they're like pretend dogs almost.
Speaker 2: It's always funny. The little dogs act bigger than the
Speaker 2: big dogs. Dude.
Speaker 7: Yeah, they don't know that they're Little's hilarious.
Speaker 3: I'm picturing like Russian nesting dolls, where one can fit
Speaker 3: inside the others. I can fit inside the others.
Speaker 16: That's actually pretty accurate.
Speaker 3: To go for a while. All right, we're sending Brook
Speaker 3: out of the studio, Jeremy, while she leaves. You know
Speaker 3: how the game works. You got thirty seconds answer as
Speaker 3: many questions as possible. If you don't know when, you
Speaker 3: could say past. But you have to beat her outright
Speaker 3: to win you ready? I am all right, let's get
Speaker 3: in that wing column. Your time starts now. Today is
Speaker 3: World Beach Day. Black sand is often found in places
Speaker 3: like Hawaii, Portugal, and the Canary Islands. What makes it black?
Speaker 3: Coral nys stands for which gaming system Nintendo, which president
Speaker 3: was not only a professional wrestler but also a licensed bartender.
Speaker 3: Fast in poker. If you're holding pocket rockets, you have
Speaker 3: a pair of what You've got a friend in me?
Speaker 3: Is the theme song from what movie franchise?
Speaker 10: Toy story?
Speaker 3: Ooh jumped on that Pixar one real fast, Good work there,
Speaker 3: Brooks coming back into the studio and I see on
Speaker 3: my screener that apparently you've been having a lot of
Speaker 3: friends and family over to your house this summer. Are
Speaker 3: you acting like a tour guide for them around the city.
Speaker 16: Pretty much since moving is where we've moved to, Like
Speaker 16: everyone's coming a visit and cool extra bedroom, So all
Speaker 16: right the family.
Speaker 5: Do they leave thinking they'll come back, or do they
Speaker 5: leave thinking like, wow, God, that was a bad decision
Speaker 5: on his part to move here.
Speaker 17: They leave with us not wanting them to.
Speaker 1: They say too long, and we're like, go out the door.
Speaker 5: My dad says, companies like fish, you know you don't
Speaker 5: want it for more than three days.
Speaker 2: After three days, right, yeah, I hate to be a
Speaker 2: fish in your house.
Speaker 3: Yeah my god. All right, let's go over to brook
Speaker 3: for her turn. It questions you ready, Yeah, your time
Speaker 3: starts now today is World Beach Day. Black sand is
Speaker 3: often found in places like Hawaii, Portugal, and the Canary Islands.
Speaker 3: What makes it black?
Speaker 2: M volcanoes?
Speaker 3: N e S stands for which gaming system PlayStation? Which
Speaker 3: president was not only a professional wrestler but also a
Speaker 3: licensed bartender? Reagan in poker, if you're holding pocket rockets,
Speaker 3: you have a pair of what uh uh jacks? You've
Speaker 3: got a friend in me? Is the theme song from
Speaker 3: what movie franchise? Sorry, this one could be a close one.
Speaker 3: Today we're gonna go to the scoreboard to see how
Speaker 3: you both did with Jose, He's a classic.
Speaker 7: Jeremy, you got three correct today?
Speaker 3: Pretty good?
Speaker 7: And bro same amount of questions?
Speaker 16: Oh no, Holy Joe. Finally, Jeremy, well done.
Speaker 3: Let's get these answers in for everybody. It's World beach Day,
Speaker 3: black sand. You'll find it in Hawaii, Portugal, Clary Islands.
Speaker 3: What makes it black? Really dirty feet? Oh Jeff, it's
Speaker 3: volcanic rock Actually yeah. Any S stands for the Nintendo
Speaker 3: Gaming System Nintendo Entertainment System. The president who was a
Speaker 3: professional wrestler and a licensed bartender was Abraham Lincoln.
Speaker 2: Oh that's right. Once you say that, I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I do have a.
Speaker 3: He was an undefeated wrestler if I remember that correct,
Speaker 3: lost one.
Speaker 5: Wasn't he more running for the presidency than he did
Speaker 5: in wrestling?
Speaker 2: Is that what you're saying?
Speaker 7: I have no idea.
Speaker 3: Yeah, if you're holding pocket rockets and poker, you have
Speaker 3: a pair of aces because they look like rockets. You know.
Speaker 2: I was trying to think of what looked like a rocket.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then I would just have been
Speaker 5: not suitable for hair.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Those are if you have those on your poker
Speaker 3: cards in a weird place and you've got a friend
Speaker 3: in me. Is the theme song from the Toy Story franchise.
Speaker 3: Y So, Jeremy, congratulations. Not only do you get a
Speaker 3: one hundred dollars just for playing, you also win a
Speaker 3: fifty dollars gift card to the Nisqually Red Wind Casino,
Speaker 3: River Water Bar and grill your Escape from the ordinary
Speaker 3: only at the Nisqually Red Wind Casino.
Speaker 5: Gosh, now I just wish another aunt would come stay
Speaker 5: with you for a week.
Speaker 9: Him.
Speaker 3: Well, good luck, Jeremy, thank you for playing. Come back
Speaker 3: and do it again. We'll be doing Windbrooks Bucks same
Speaker 3: time tomorrow. Brooking Jeffrey in the morning,