Speaker 1: This is the radio segment that just put a request
Speaker 1: into the streaming service Disney Plus, asking if they could
Speaker 1: filter out all the children's content so he could just
Speaker 1: get to Disney hardcore. I don't think they've watched that
Speaker 1: too many g rated anime things to sit through. Just
Speaker 1: give me the good stuff. Surprisingly, Disney said they're working
Speaker 1: on it. Oh, everybody wins good. Laser Stories the segment
Speaker 1: where we read weird news stories around the globe, just
Speaker 1: like everyone else does, except we've got a laser and
Speaker 1: those other Jimminy crackheads just dump. This first laser story
Speaker 1: is out of Portugal. A tourist from Azerbaijan was enjoying
Speaker 1: a family holiday. It was at a beautiful Lisbon cafe
Speaker 1: when he thought the only thing that would make the
Speaker 1: idyllic setting even better would be to have a nice
Speaker 1: glass of pomegranate juice. Got that clip, finally makes so
Speaker 1: much sense. We been waiting for years to use that
Speaker 1: amazing and I bet that would be really nice to
Speaker 1: have some pomegranate juice in Portugal tropical Yeah. So the
Speaker 1: thirty six year old opened up his translate app in
Speaker 1: his phone and typed the request. He showed it to
Speaker 1: the waiter, who immediately ran into the back. Good service,
Speaker 1: But five minutes later, armed police stormed in and ordered
Speaker 1: the tourists to the ground. The whole area got put
Speaker 1: on lockdown, and his hotel room was simultaneously raided and
Speaker 1: searched just because of juice. Officials handcuffed him and took
Speaker 1: him to a nearby police station, and that's where they
Speaker 1: started to question him and figured out almost immediately what
Speaker 1: had happened, because apparently the translation app had turned the
Speaker 1: Russian word for pomegranate into the Portuguese word for grenade.
Speaker 1: So once authorities realized it was it's a harmless mistake,
Speaker 1: they let him go and they told him to enjoy
Speaker 1: the rest of his vacation. Oh my god.
Speaker 2: However, translating anything.
Speaker 1: Again, they did recommend he used a Portuguese phrase book
Speaker 1: instead of an app.
Speaker 2: Next, Yeah, then all those phrases are okay.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Can I get to roll? Get luncher with.
Speaker 2: This?
Speaker 1: Next laser story is out of England. Back in twenty nineteen,
Speaker 1: a man named Kenny Cannard decided it'd be funny to
Speaker 1: legally change his name for a laugh. I can't believe
Speaker 1: what people do. This I know this is so common.
Speaker 2: My girlfriends don't even want to do it for marriage,
Speaker 2: like someone just never do because they don't get around
Speaker 2: to it. It's so much work.
Speaker 1: Well, he went to the government and got a brand
Speaker 1: new license and officially became f You canarsh.
Speaker 2: Gos like fun.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it's supposed to say it. Few him and
Speaker 1: his buddies thought it was hilarious, right, laugh, and he
Speaker 1: kept with the moniker because it was a great conversation
Speaker 1: star or whenever he went out. I don't know why.
Speaker 2: I feel like him and his buddy's all single just
Speaker 2: to stab in the dark.
Speaker 1: Well, now his joke is backfired because he recently went
Speaker 1: to get a new passport and update his name on it.
Speaker 1: But after he submitted it, he found out he was denied.
Speaker 1: He was told his name may cause offense. So they
Speaker 1: are sorry, but it is what it is, and he
Speaker 1: can't travel internationally anymore.
Speaker 2: I don't know your name could get you banned from
Speaker 2: a passport.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess if it's a if it's going to
Speaker 1: be considered offensive to the places that you travel. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and also don't do it. Don't name your kid bomb. Yeah,
Speaker 1: good reminder. So he appealed against the Passport Office's verdict
Speaker 1: three times, but the British government has refused to budge.
Speaker 1: So at this point he's he going to change it back.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that would make sense.
Speaker 1: No, he's not explained that he doesn't want to go
Speaker 1: do another name change.
Speaker 2: Well, it's in the name. How he feels.
Speaker 1: He's just resigned to the fact that he's never gonna
Speaker 1: to be able to travel overseas ever again, this next
Speaker 1: laser story is out of Holiday headquarters.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: No matter what any trademarks or lawsuits say, Mariah Carey
Speaker 1: is considered the true Queen of Christmas? Is she near
Speaker 1: the queen approach it? Whoever her latest business manager is
Speaker 1: has convinced the Queen to really lean into the money
Speaker 1: making part of it. Oh can I say that? Because
Speaker 1: the other day she unveiled a brand new Christmas shirt.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, she arety. Has have you seen the
Speaker 2: Christmas animated movie? Oh my god, so Mariah Carey animation too.
Speaker 2: It's all about the songs.
Speaker 1: She's doing everything. But her shirt has a picture of
Speaker 1: her on it with the phrase It's time. Oh yeah, Okay,
Speaker 1: that's gonna sell for thirty five bucks on Amazon. Allowed
Speaker 1: Why do I.
Speaker 2: Picture Santa Claus wearing it?
Speaker 1: Anybody would? I guess it's in along with some other
Speaker 1: Christmas merch on there that includes her Christmas Funko Pop,
Speaker 1: a deluxe edition of her Merry Christmas album, and her
Speaker 1: children's book The Christmas Princess The Adventures of Little Mariah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Little Mariah, that's the movie.
Speaker 1: Show turned it into a whole movie.
Speaker 2: It's like a little animated Mariah with a really big head.
Speaker 1: She needs some more money. She deserves it. On a
Speaker 1: slightly different note, Mariah is also the star of Victoria's
Speaker 1: Secrets New Holiday campaign Go. So she'll have the lingerie
Speaker 1: with her picture on it and above her head. It'll
Speaker 1: just say it's time.
Speaker 2: Because nothing says Christmas Morning like Mommy coming down in Lingerie.
Speaker 1: Mariah Lingerie. This next Lazer story is out of movie land.
Speaker 2: Sorry.
Speaker 1: Remember when Avengers Endgame came out and fans were all
Speaker 1: sharing the like spoiler free tips on when you should
Speaker 1: take bathroom breaks? Oh yeah, because it was three hours long,
Speaker 1: so all those tips immediately went viral.
Speaker 2: Isn't like a whole app around it or something? I
Speaker 2: can't remember.
Speaker 1: Everybody wanted to know when they could leave to come
Speaker 1: back and not miss anything this year, Oppenheimer was also
Speaker 1: three hours long. Yeah, and that new movie Killers of
Speaker 1: the Flower Moon with Leonardo DiCaprio and Robert Demiro. That's
Speaker 1: three hours and twenty six minutes long.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry if you guys have not read the book
Speaker 2: do it.
Speaker 1: You don't what It's been three and a half hour
Speaker 1: movie two weeks. I recommend that it may take you three.
Speaker 2: But it's heartbreaking and it's really sad.
Speaker 1: Obviously, there's all these really long movies coming out. So
Speaker 1: a new poll asked if we should have intermissions for
Speaker 1: movies shown in theaters that's brilliant. Twenty four percent said
Speaker 1: yes for movies at least three hours long. Another twenty
Speaker 1: three percent said yes for ones that are just two
Speaker 1: hours long. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, it should be like
Speaker 1: halfway through any movie. Yeah, I kind of like it.
Speaker 2: I mean we do it on family movie nights. All right, pause,
Speaker 2: everybody get there for jamazon brush your teeth.
Speaker 1: Yes, mommy and daddy are having a love making break.
Speaker 1: Everybody pause much time. Young adults are more likely to
Speaker 1: want the intermission than old folks, who will proudly boast
Speaker 1: about back in the day when they sat through Gone
Speaker 1: with the.
Speaker 2: Wind, Damn, I'm tired.
Speaker 1: Two other important stats. Twenty five percent said a movie
Speaker 1: should never have an intermission yeah, and twelve percent said
Speaker 1: all movies should have intermissions, no matter the lane.
Speaker 2: The people that are saying never, like my dad, who
Speaker 2: literally sleeps through the entire na.
Speaker 1: You know, So it looks like we're all gonna have
Speaker 1: to agree to disagree. Actually, this guy is in a
Speaker 1: disagreement with Brooks left shoe right now. He wants to
Speaker 1: blindfold it, but the shoe wants to do it the
Speaker 1: old fashioned way. Layson's tight. That sound means Laser Stories
Speaker 1: is over for the day. We'll do it again the
Speaker 1: same time on Wednesday.
Speaker 2: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.