Speaker 1: Welcome to Money Making Conversations. It's the show that she
Speaker 1: has the secrets of success experience firsthand by marketing and
Speaker 1: Brandon expert Rashan McDonald. I will know he's giving me
Speaker 1: advice to many occasions. In in case you didn't notice,
Speaker 1: I'm not broke. You know. He'll be interview with celebrity CEOs,
Speaker 1: entrepreneurs and industry decision makers. It's what he likes to do.
Speaker 1: It's what he likes to share. Now it's time to
Speaker 1: hear from my man, Rashan McDonald money Making Conversations. Here
Speaker 1: we come working with Money Making Conversation. I'm back again,
Speaker 1: your host, Rashan McDonald. I always tell people it's time
Speaker 1: to stop reading other people's success stories. I say that
Speaker 1: every time I start this show. It's time you start
Speaker 1: doing your job and writing your own story. And I
Speaker 1: always tell people to leave with their gifts and don't
Speaker 1: let their friends age, especially age, stop you from playing
Speaker 1: your dreams or living your dreams. My in interviewers always
Speaker 1: include consumers, uh, CEOs, entrepreneurs, and what I call industry
Speaker 1: decision maker. My next guest, he's an interesting decision maker.
Speaker 1: He's a celebrity because he's on TV every night. He's
Speaker 1: an entrepreneur. His name is Don Lemon. He's the host
Speaker 1: of Seeing n Tonight with Don Lemon, and he's America's
Speaker 1: only black prime time anchor. In Done was the leading
Speaker 1: voice on CNN guide in viewers like me to the
Speaker 1: death of George Floyd's on the summer nationwide protests and riots.
Speaker 1: The viewers and myself we depended on him nightly to
Speaker 1: guide us through the global pandemic. I recently got a vaccine,
Speaker 1: and I tell you something. He guided me through the
Speaker 1: process of being mature enough to deal with that and
Speaker 1: go get the vaccine. I got it yesterday. Now an urgent,
Speaker 1: deeply personal and riveteen plead. His new book shows us
Speaker 1: how deep our problem live with racism and what we
Speaker 1: can do to begin to fix the problem. The book
Speaker 1: is entitled This is the Fire What I Say to
Speaker 1: My friends about Racism. Don brings his vast audience and
Speaker 1: experience as a reporter and a black man to today's
Speaker 1: most urgent question, how can we end racism in America
Speaker 1: in our lifetime? Please welcome to Money Making Conversation Don
Speaker 1: Lemon for Sean. Thank you so much. It's good to
Speaker 1: be with you. Again and while on an introduction, Well,
Speaker 1: you know, some man, it was. It was emotional, you know,
Speaker 1: because I read the book and the book was a journey.
Speaker 1: And I say that to everybody that before I get
Speaker 1: into detail about the book. One of the things that
Speaker 1: I love what you said is somebody says they have
Speaker 1: the answer the racism, basically walk away from because they lack.
Speaker 1: And you say that in the book because that's true.
Speaker 1: Talk to us about that. Well, I said, I wanted
Speaker 1: to write this book because I thought I had some
Speaker 1: things that I could speak to and that I could
Speaker 1: speak because I'm at the really at the matrix of
Speaker 1: as you so keenly pointed out, everything that happens in
Speaker 1: this country every single night, or every weeknight at least
Speaker 1: sometimes on weekends, sometimes seven nights a week. Uh, And
Speaker 1: I'm just sort of guiding people through the process and
Speaker 1: so um, so you're right on about that. I it was,
Speaker 1: it was. It was a tough thing to write this book, knowing,
Speaker 1: um what I know and experiencing what I experience, and
Speaker 1: it was, as you said, very personal. Just before just
Speaker 1: before I hung up with you a couple of minutes
Speaker 1: and just before I got on with you a couple
Speaker 1: of minutes ago. Um, you know, my I write the
Speaker 1: letter to my nephew in the beginning of the book.
Speaker 1: My niece and her husband called, which is Trishad my
Speaker 1: great nephew who I write the letter to. It's his
Speaker 1: mom and his stepdad and they called me and they
Speaker 1: were so emotional about the book and they didn't realize
Speaker 1: just how personal and how candid it would be. And
Speaker 1: they said they were actually crying reading the book. And
Speaker 1: He's like, and you know, his stepdad, Jeffrey said, I'm
Speaker 1: not an emotional person, but done you made me cry.
Speaker 1: I believe this book is going to be a classic
Speaker 1: and in a hundred years people are going to be reading.
Speaker 1: And I said, what, So there you go. But you
Speaker 1: know in that letter it was it was come of
Speaker 1: things made me smile. We said we shared the same
Speaker 1: foehead nose, and we're all articulated on bones, on bones,
Speaker 1: what is that? What is that? Come? Then you know
Speaker 1: you know well articulated armbones, that everything is in the
Speaker 1: right place right. Um. Um, there's a there's a photo
Speaker 1: of us at the beach from a couple of summers ago,
Speaker 1: and um, very similar. He's he is the younger body. Uh,
Speaker 1: the younger version of me. And so I look at it.
Speaker 1: I said, look, we have the same arms and we
Speaker 1: have the same thing. Weird And so that I said,
Speaker 1: how do would I put that in there? And to
Speaker 1: the same You know, it's so simple to say we
Speaker 1: have the same arm and say, well, don't let to
Speaker 1: say the same well articulated arm. But I love that
Speaker 1: it may be smile because the book like this, You
Speaker 1: want to smile. You want to find those moments of
Speaker 1: happiness because it's the truth. And sometimes when you deal
Speaker 1: with racism and that, and you know, white people, they
Speaker 1: always say you have to say, white people, can you
Speaker 1: just move on? You know, we know there's a problem.
Speaker 1: Can we move on. That's not me. They don't really
Speaker 1: realize the vast nature hot racism is so undercover. The
Speaker 1: beauty of electing a person like you said with Donald
Speaker 1: Trump in to you said, he led us to the fire,
Speaker 1: and what exactly is the fire? Well, he's led us
Speaker 1: to the farming and then poured gasoline on it. Um
Speaker 1: the Fire is James Balwin's book, UM the Fire Next Time,
Speaker 1: which was this was a tribute to right. That's why
Speaker 1: one of the reasons that I UM fashioned the book
Speaker 1: in the way that I fashioned it is because James
Speaker 1: Balwan is my literary hero UM. As I was as
Speaker 1: I read I read The Fire Next Time a couple
Speaker 1: of times a year, and as all of these events
Speaker 1: were unfolding UM in the last few years, and especially
Speaker 1: the last year in the summer of I wanted to
Speaker 1: write something. I was inspired to write something that was short,
Speaker 1: that was concise, and that was powerful, and I wrote
Speaker 1: it in the fashion of James Baldwin. That's why James
Speaker 1: Balwan starts The Fire Next Time with a letter to
Speaker 1: his nephew one hundred years after the Emancipation Proclamation, on
Speaker 1: the anniversary one hundred years and he starts by saying
Speaker 1: something like, we know that we're celebrating or we're writing this.
Speaker 1: You know I've begun this letter, Um a thousand times
Speaker 1: and I've torn it up. And then he says, we
Speaker 1: know that we're celebrating this anniversary a hundred years too soon,
Speaker 1: even though it's hundred the universary of the Emancipation Patient Proclamation.
Speaker 1: And when he said God gave no other rainbow sign,
Speaker 1: no more water the Fire Next Time, to me, that
Speaker 1: was an indication. In a call after watching someone die
Speaker 1: on camera. UM, that we were in the fire, and
Speaker 1: that we were at an inflection point in our society. UM,
Speaker 1: and either we could decide as a group of people
Speaker 1: to continue on to towards a more perfect union rather
Speaker 1: than a divisive union, or regressing to a time where UM,
Speaker 1: people of color and marginalized people did not have equal
Speaker 1: rights under the law, under the Constitution, or at least
Speaker 1: under the law unto the Constitution, they should have, but
Speaker 1: not more treated that way. And so I believe that
Speaker 1: we are this is the fire that we're in right now.
Speaker 1: If we don't fix this, then it's going to get
Speaker 1: hotter and worse and we will never fix it. We're
Speaker 1: at an inflection point where it needs to change. And
Speaker 1: in the book we talked but I think it's a
Speaker 1: great segue because you said brought a perfect union because
Speaker 1: at the age of three three in your book you
Speaker 1: talk about Thomas Jefferson and he's writing. But before we
Speaker 1: go there, let's go back to sixteen nineteen, as you're
Speaker 1: talking about when they really all started, you know, and
Speaker 1: you know, men and women of dark complexion of color
Speaker 1: collection skin was sold a slave in sixteen nineteen. And
Speaker 1: then you jumped to Thomas Jefferson at the age of
Speaker 1: thirty two and when they wanted to do right, but
Speaker 1: they were shouted down by men who didn't want to
Speaker 1: do right because they said, Who're gonna pick the cotton?
Speaker 1: I'm not picking the cotton, So the right And then
Speaker 1: because it was, like I said, it was a beautiful book.
Speaker 1: First of all, I want to compliment you on that
Speaker 1: because I read a lot of books and and what
Speaker 1: captures me as a as a reader is emotion. And
Speaker 1: it also you're a very colorful writer. In other words,
Speaker 1: I actually felt the moments I felt, uh, Thomas Jefferson's
Speaker 1: issues that he had in your writing. And then you
Speaker 1: jump to uh, miss martel In in eighteen forty seven.
Speaker 1: It gets personal with you because you start talking about
Speaker 1: your life. You know, you start talking about this is
Speaker 1: an area of the country that you live in, and she,
Speaker 1: as a black woman, was in a position to purchase
Speaker 1: land and the issues that she had to deal with.
Speaker 1: And then you jump even further to George Florida. Why
Speaker 1: was it important to have these transitional time moments in
Speaker 1: your book to set the stage, Because I think it
Speaker 1: was important to show that the true history of the
Speaker 1: country and the contributions of black people, people of color,
Speaker 1: of um people who were descendants of slaves. I thought
Speaker 1: it was important to be able to point that out
Speaker 1: because I don't think that we can solve this unless
Speaker 1: we start at the beginning. And the beginning is a
Speaker 1: true history of this country. You mentioned sixteen nineteen, and
Speaker 1: there's a sixteen nineteen projects. But there's also what we
Speaker 1: should realize is that long before the Mayflower was here,
Speaker 1: there were people who came over who made the journey
Speaker 1: across the Atlantic, and they were Africans, and there were
Speaker 1: people who helped to build this country for free. So
Speaker 1: while we look upon the descendants of the people who
Speaker 1: came over on Mayflower is sort of vaunted or celebrated position, um,
Speaker 1: perhaps that we should teach the history of the people
Speaker 1: who came over before them as well and who actually
Speaker 1: built the country for free as slave slave labor. And um.
Speaker 1: So I used mon terry, because mon terry that should
Speaker 1: be taught in our history books to American history to kids,
Speaker 1: as we teach Christopher Columbus discovered America. Christopher Columbus did
Speaker 1: not discover America. America was here long before Christopher Columbus
Speaker 1: Columbus was here, just asked any Native American. And it's
Speaker 1: insulting to people actually to learn that, because it's not
Speaker 1: the truth. If you want to say Christopher Columbus conquered America,
Speaker 1: or that, um, that Europeans conquered America, Okay, that might
Speaker 1: be a fair statement. So that um people like mon
Speaker 1: Terry and his sister a Maza, and um the German
Speaker 1: Coast Uprising which I write about, and a number of
Speaker 1: other things that in instances in the book that include
Speaker 1: African Americans or African how African people contributed to this country.
Speaker 1: I think that's where we start with the truth from
Speaker 1: the beginning, and that's why I woke all of those
Speaker 1: instances into the book to try to bring it all
Speaker 1: from the past, from the beginning into the presence. Now
Speaker 1: you said the book you do not pretend to have
Speaker 1: any answers, and then the book is this is the fire.
Speaker 1: What I say to my friends about racism? What what
Speaker 1: response are you given to your friends? So the response
Speaker 1: that the biggest responses that we have to do the
Speaker 1: work is that there's a shared responsibility that we all
Speaker 1: have as American where we can't say, well, you know,
Speaker 1: my people didn't do this, and my people didn't do that,
Speaker 1: and I didn't know in plays and I didn't know,
Speaker 1: but um, there but there were people in this country, um,
Speaker 1: who weren't able to vote, weren't able to get an education,
Speaker 1: who were not able to live with they where they
Speaker 1: wanted and weren't able to which is the biggest part
Speaker 1: of it is to earn generational wealth. And but who
Speaker 1: helped to build the wealth for wealthy people, and which
Speaker 1: offers what an ease in society and a comfort and
Speaker 1: a level of privilege that that isn't afforded to most
Speaker 1: people of color in this country. And so what I
Speaker 1: tell them is that again they must know their history,
Speaker 1: start from the beginning and teaching their children the real
Speaker 1: history of this country. But I also tell people that
Speaker 1: the difference is going to be made with the relationship,
Speaker 1: because when you see people as human, when you see
Speaker 1: people's humanity, it's hard to discriminate against them, it's hard
Speaker 1: to be humanize them. And it's even more difficult to
Speaker 1: put your knee on their neck for almost nine minutes
Speaker 1: on a street in front of the world to see.
Speaker 1: So relationships, get to know people who don't look like
Speaker 1: you that's really important, and really it was. It was
Speaker 1: interesting things. When I talk, I try to talk out
Speaker 1: of when I talk to my staff, I talked to
Speaker 1: my family, talked to my my daughter. I would talk
Speaker 1: about the reality what Donald Trump was to this country.
Speaker 1: I always felt that and I tell the people that
Speaker 1: I said, if it hit equipment would have one. In
Speaker 1: twenty sixteen, I think that we needed this gut check
Speaker 1: because I felt that Donald Trump pushed his country into
Speaker 1: a state of racist reality and it brought out a
Speaker 1: lot of people wore boldly let them know how they
Speaker 1: feel about race, but boldly letting them know, let you
Speaker 1: know what side of the eye they're willing to stand on.
Speaker 1: Do you think that's good or bad? Because myself, I
Speaker 1: think I want to know what a person thinks. It's
Speaker 1: them hiding what they think. I want to know as well.
Speaker 1: I would rather someone tell me who they are. I
Speaker 1: would rather know who they are, and we do now.
Speaker 1: And that's why I say in the book that he
Speaker 1: was the president we deserved and probably the president we needed. Now,
Speaker 1: what would it have been better if it if we
Speaker 1: could have learned the same lessons through a different person
Speaker 1: with a different experience. Yes, but all things being what
Speaker 1: they were and what they are right now, we must
Speaker 1: look at the reality, and that is that he exposed
Speaker 1: um for us, the symptoms of what is boiling or
Speaker 1: going on beneath the surface. And he's the one that
Speaker 1: sent us into the doctor's office to have a diagnosed
Speaker 1: and then fix whatever that is. Whether it's a long
Speaker 1: process of convalescing and trying to get better and um
Speaker 1: and recovery, or whether it's just to excite the problem
Speaker 1: and try to do it immediately and as fast as possible.
Speaker 1: But whatever it is, he led it, He exposed it,
Speaker 1: and he led us here. And now we know we
Speaker 1: don't have to live in um some false reality that
Speaker 1: we thought that we were post racial, because we're not. Absolutely.
Speaker 1: You know the thing about it, I here's an interesting
Speaker 1: part about my life. And you know, when you you know,
Speaker 1: you develop a relationship with a person like you, you know,
Speaker 1: I value the time I spend with you now, but
Speaker 1: I even value the time I spend with you whenever
Speaker 1: at my home, and I turn you on it as
Speaker 1: a that's an honesty about you done. It's please expound
Speaker 1: on that, because is riveting to me last night when
Speaker 1: I so you interviewed the Capitol police officer who had
Speaker 1: uh and you in in twelve Republican members of Congress
Speaker 1: didn't want to honor them because they didn't see the
Speaker 1: January sixth event as an insurrection, even though five people
Speaker 1: died at that little I guess protest that got out
Speaker 1: of hand. I guess that's what they're calling it. I
Speaker 1: don't know. But this man, you know, he used the
Speaker 1: word are racial slur. He didn't want to use the
Speaker 1: N word, but he was mentally bruised. It may take
Speaker 1: years of therapy to recover from that moment. But you
Speaker 1: was the interviewer. How did you How were you taking
Speaker 1: all of that and then maintaining emotions? Well, I have
Speaker 1: to because um I am the fissilitator, right and if
Speaker 1: I lose my composure, then you don't get anything out
Speaker 1: of the interview. But at the very beginning of the interview,
Speaker 1: I started talking to him and then he said, I'm sorry, stop.
Speaker 1: I didn't expect to be this emotional, and so I
Speaker 1: said to him, it's okay, go ahead and talk to us.
Speaker 1: Why are you emotional? And they get than he has
Speaker 1: to explain it. Um. It gives him a place to
Speaker 1: go rather than going down spiral and spiraling into his emotions.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you just have to allow it and let people
Speaker 1: say what they want to say. But I think it
Speaker 1: was more productive Um that he explained his feelings and
Speaker 1: why he had become so emotional, And he said, because
Speaker 1: I hadn't really had a chance before this interview. The
Speaker 1: way I set it up the interview, he said, it
Speaker 1: gave him a fuller perspective or more fulsome perspective about
Speaker 1: um what had transpired and what people thought about it.
Speaker 1: And also he had done one earlier interview, and in
Speaker 1: that earlier interview he had not spoken to his fellow officers,
Speaker 1: and after speaking to his fellow officers, he got more
Speaker 1: of their experiences. And that cut even deeper because one
Speaker 1: of one of the fellow officers said to him, Um,
Speaker 1: the protesters were not only calling, you know, me the
Speaker 1: N word, but they said, hey, N word, you have
Speaker 1: that rifle in your hand. You're so big and bad.
Speaker 1: Why don't you put that rifle down and we'll show
Speaker 1: you how big of an inWORD you are. And this
Speaker 1: is a police officer who is who puts his life
Speaker 1: on the line every day, and these people are out
Speaker 1: there supposed to be supporters of the police officers, and
Speaker 1: you know so called blue lives matter, but they're beating
Speaker 1: them with blue Lives Matter black poles and signs. So um,
Speaker 1: that's that's why he was emotional because he had had
Speaker 1: time to absorbit. He hadn't had time to absorbit before.
Speaker 1: I think he was somewhat still in a state of shock.
Speaker 1: We know, just in reading this book. You know, great
Speaker 1: picture on the back by the way, I love that picture.
Speaker 1: Where where would it ticket? Thank you? That was taken
Speaker 1: in the backyard of my house, in front of I
Speaker 1: have a shed in the backyard. What is it? A
Speaker 1: shed in the backyard, And that's the door to the
Speaker 1: shed and I'm actually, um standing right next to there's
Speaker 1: a hydrained the bushes that I'm trying not to crush
Speaker 1: because you know, as a book you write about a
Speaker 1: black man with white hairage, you embody both the struggle
Speaker 1: and the hope of conciliation, you know. And I look
Speaker 1: at this very simple picture and it's and it works
Speaker 1: for you, you know. You know, I don't see the tide,
Speaker 1: I don't see the look I see o t V.
Speaker 1: And you have an amazing smile. That's why it's always
Speaker 1: with me and you. When I interview you, I really
Speaker 1: want to see the smile. But I have to balance
Speaker 1: that because you're such a you know, your your business
Speaker 1: is serious. You a guy, You a guy who has
Speaker 1: to who present the whole process of being serious and
Speaker 1: also informative. Talk to us before we exit on this
Speaker 1: brilliant book. This is the Fire What I say to
Speaker 1: my friends about racism by Don Lemon. There was a
Speaker 1: wrap up my friends, so we can sell some more
Speaker 1: books coming. What do you want to know? What do
Speaker 1: you want to know? From? Where do we go? You know,
Speaker 1: without revealing the process of your book, But where do
Speaker 1: you we go? How do we what? What do I
Speaker 1: have to do? You know, I feel I'm doing a
Speaker 1: good job. We go with honesty, We go with a
Speaker 1: sense of openness. We go with a vulnerability, the same vulnerability.
Speaker 1: Are in the same mindset that we had during the
Speaker 1: summer when we were in our homes, when um, when
Speaker 1: our hearts and our minds are open, and then we
Speaker 1: saw someone die in front of our eyes. We go
Speaker 1: with that vulnerability, and we have to to um to
Speaker 1: a large degree, trust that our countrymen will do the
Speaker 1: right thing. But trust yet verify, but I would, I
Speaker 1: would say, but here's what I think again, And I
Speaker 1: hate to keep harping on this, and I know people
Speaker 1: think it's you know, it may sound traite. We have
Speaker 1: to establish relationships, especially with people who do not look
Speaker 1: like us, the people who do not live particularly maybe
Speaker 1: in our same neighborhood or travel in our same circles.
Speaker 1: That is the only way it's going to happen. We
Speaker 1: have to begin to respect and learn and love each
Speaker 1: other and see each other's humanity. And that's and and
Speaker 1: and then beyond that, we have to begin to do
Speaker 1: the work. That's that We've got to do the work.
Speaker 1: And and doing the work requires an open mind in
Speaker 1: an open heart. Well, you've done the work. You've written
Speaker 1: the brilliant book and informative book and emotional book. This
Speaker 1: is the fire. What I say to my friends about racism, Well,
Speaker 1: you say to me every night, makes me feel good
Speaker 1: and informs me and gives me hope. Done, lemon, don't
Speaker 1: you stop? And you are the prime time black man
Speaker 1: for America for now to like that? Okay, h thank
Speaker 1: you so much with that. I really appreciate all your support. Uh,
Speaker 1: and thank you for your kind words. And I'll be
Speaker 1: talking to you tonight on my show and hopefully I'll
Speaker 1: be back you on your show as well. Okay, big Timer,
Speaker 1: stay safe and we'll win big Okay. I love this banking.
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Speaker 1: be right back with more money making conversations with your host.
Speaker 1: Rashan McDonald him Rushan McDonald, the host of Money Making Conversation.
Speaker 1: The Cafe Moka Swag Award is a celebration of black
Speaker 1: men who will making a difference in our community by
Speaker 1: empowering others to reach their life goals from civic leaders, businessmen, activists,
Speaker 1: celebrities and everyday days. The Cafe Moca Swag Award one
Speaker 1: of this week is Mark Morel. He is the president
Speaker 1: and the CEO of the National Urban League. He fights
Speaker 1: on the behalf of the National Urban League to create
Speaker 1: at the community with a voice so loud that nothing
Speaker 1: can stand in the way of change. Mark Morrel is
Speaker 1: ready to teach others what he has learned along the
Speaker 1: way by showing others what it means to be a
Speaker 1: leader who can unite voices and create meaningful change for everyone.
Speaker 1: Because I say, young people, you're never too young to
Speaker 1: take all the challenge, never too young to serve, never
Speaker 1: too young to expel, and don't let anybody diminish you.
Speaker 1: But you gotta know you're ready. You gotta have a
Speaker 1: confidence in your ability, and you've got to be mature
Speaker 1: enough to make the difficult and challenging decisions. And you know,
Speaker 1: I feel so so especially that I want to give
Speaker 1: back the lessons I've learned. The Cafe Morga Swag Award
Speaker 1: represents men who have strength, whose wisdom is asserted, and
Speaker 1: who is genuine in their spirit. Welcome back to money
Speaker 1: making conversations with your host Rashan McDonald. My next guest
Speaker 1: is Terence to Real. Let me just let y'all know
Speaker 1: a little bit about him, because I've been following him.
Speaker 1: He's motor y'all, half man, half motorcycle. You those progressive motors. Now,
Speaker 1: I know all that black dude, that black dude on
Speaker 1: that on that treadmill, on that tramior burning rubble. That's
Speaker 1: my man right here, Terence Terrell. We're gonna put the
Speaker 1: word out by him. He's an Emmy Award when an actor, author, musician,
Speaker 1: and philanthropist. He's appeared on Bosh for Amazon, Loved Him,
Speaker 1: On That Room, One on Fourth for HBO, Batwoman for
Speaker 1: the c W, and The First Wives Club for BT Plus. Also,
Speaker 1: he's a Raised The Giants, for which he won a
Speaker 1: Daytime Emmy for Outstanding Supported Actor in the digital drama series.
Speaker 1: Chance can be seen in series on the series on
Speaker 1: New Truck Laurie, I'm Chuck Laura I Chuck, Laurie calls you.
Speaker 1: Then you start get know your needs. You said, thank God,
Speaker 1: because this man history on television is legendary for sustaining
Speaker 1: sitcoms on the air. But let's go a little bit
Speaker 1: about this brother here. He's uh, he's originally from Cleveland, Mississippi.
Speaker 1: So you have to use the word humble, beguinneas with him.
Speaker 1: He's an HPC your law Mississippi Valley State, that's Jr.
Speaker 1: Rance Country Willie Todd, you know what I'm talking about,
Speaker 1: and currently resides in Los Angeles, California. You know the
Speaker 1: beauty of him. Man. He has a book out that
Speaker 1: we're gonna talk about is a self published children's book
Speaker 1: series and includes the titles of Blackie, He's a previous
Speaker 1: book that he's written, but my Little Black Book. The
Speaker 1: book promotes black beauty, inclusion, and self love, which is
Speaker 1: some of the forces that drive this young man as
Speaker 1: he builds his empire through his talent, hard work, passion,
Speaker 1: and his commitment to making other people better. Please work
Speaker 1: with the money making a conversation. He had to change
Speaker 1: his background once he realized who was interviewing him. He
Speaker 1: thought he was in the basement. Please welcome terrce does
Speaker 1: be showing up? I was like, let me let me
Speaker 1: show it out. Let me get ready for you. No,
Speaker 1: hold up, hey man, Okay, who are you overgain hold on?
Speaker 1: Hold on, hold hold on. That's your background? That ain't
Speaker 1: no like uh like the a little thing they just
Speaker 1: put on like a little flip pitcher. Now that's me, brother,
Speaker 1: Let me know about me. Let me do something where
Speaker 1: you're upgrading ground. Well, first of all, you're a handsome guy,
Speaker 1: So any background you'll be in front of gonna work
Speaker 1: for you. So let's go and get that. That's gonna
Speaker 1: get that out to wait. But you come from Cleveland, Mississippi. Now,
Speaker 1: I've been all over. I have been in that city because,
Speaker 1: like I said, I know about Cleveland, uh, Mississippi, Alabama,
Speaker 1: because I was a stand up comedian. So I was
Speaker 1: going up and down all the little towns man, just
Speaker 1: trying to make my career work. And and when you're
Speaker 1: trying to make your career work, sometimes you have to
Speaker 1: do in play places that on one on that schedule
Speaker 1: for starting. And so come from Cleveland now residing in
Speaker 1: Los Angeles, tell us about their journey because we have
Speaker 1: to stop at the HBCU country that I mentioned in
Speaker 1: your intro Mississippi Valley State. Because right now HBCU brand
Speaker 1: recognition is on fire. You have to be proud. Yes, Um,
Speaker 1: So I was raised that while I grew up in Mississippi,
Speaker 1: but my mom moved us from Cleveland at five and
Speaker 1: I went to San Diego, and then I came back
Speaker 1: to Clean, Mississippi when I was fifteen because my grandmother.
Speaker 1: You know, you go back to the South because somebody
Speaker 1: sick or you gotta help family, remember house. So my
Speaker 1: grandmother had open heart surgery, so I went back to
Speaker 1: help her out. Um, and I end up going to
Speaker 1: college at Missisipi Valley State there undergrad that was undergrad
Speaker 1: then grad school. I went to Jackson State. But I
Speaker 1: was a drum major at Mississippi Valley State. So I
Speaker 1: was in front of the band. Come on that you
Speaker 1: was that guy that did displayed. Now, hey man, let's
Speaker 1: let's let's talk about that man, because that's no joke. Man,
Speaker 1: You're the drum major for a black marching band and
Speaker 1: an HBCU. Hey brother, than you know, finally somebody understand
Speaker 1: when you say drum major. They'd be like, oh, the
Speaker 1: person that played drum major is literally like the Michael
Speaker 1: Jackson of the band. You gotta you gotta be you
Speaker 1: gotta know the steps, you gotta know the cues, you
Speaker 1: gotta know the sections. You gotta be in control. So yeah,
Speaker 1: so you know the gangster of what a drum major is.
Speaker 1: I became a drum major freshman year, and that usually
Speaker 1: never happens. You gotta be in the gym. Not the gym,
Speaker 1: but you gotta be in a band for at least
Speaker 1: two years to do that. As I tried out and
Speaker 1: I made it, and so I was a freshman drum
Speaker 1: major and so you know, of course I had to
Speaker 1: be very strong because you have people in the band,
Speaker 1: like what seven years they ain't graduated. Maybe it was
Speaker 1: just being a band, So yeah, it was. It was
Speaker 1: a very cool experience by learning so much music, so
Speaker 1: so many amazing things that you can learn. You learn
Speaker 1: how to survive that HBCU. You of course get your education,
Speaker 1: but you learn how to make a way out of
Speaker 1: no way, right, And it's really important you sitting there
Speaker 1: and look because I don't want to because we talked
Speaker 1: about HBCUs and I want to go back to that
Speaker 1: bunching band experience, because that's the cornerstone of what HBCUs
Speaker 1: are known for. And you know, we know about sports,
Speaker 1: but the bands or that half, I'm shure. And then
Speaker 1: you then you cast it throwing to HBCU. Well, you
Speaker 1: know I did undergrad it Miss Valor State and then
Speaker 1: I did granted Jackson State with Dion Sanders, got him
Speaker 1: two old tanning up all on the front bas ESPN.
Speaker 1: They undefeated everything. Man, you have to be in Miss
Speaker 1: Valor State home Hall of Famer Jared Rice. Man, you
Speaker 1: have to be brother. You gotta have some hbc you
Speaker 1: photos and from your house. It's it's it's a great
Speaker 1: time for hbc U. My degrees. But the funny thing
Speaker 1: is coach Todd and he was at my He used
Speaker 1: to coach at my high school at East Side High
Speaker 1: in Cleveland, and then when I went into I think
Speaker 1: he left and went to Valley State. So I marched
Speaker 1: into Titan Ross Rice Stadium on a weekly basis. So
Speaker 1: just the just the love and the energy that I
Speaker 1: got from there. And then of course it was so
Speaker 1: funny because you know a lot of people like you
Speaker 1: shouldn't go to two HBCU. You should go to undergrad
Speaker 1: at one and then maybe you should go to old Mrs. Something.
Speaker 1: But I was like, no, I'm gonna stick. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: stick from my HBCU and I'm gonna do Jackson State
Speaker 1: because you know, they say you won't look upon as
Speaker 1: a serious college student if you went to to h
Speaker 1: b c U S. So, thank god out and listened
Speaker 1: to quote unquote day whoever they are. You know, it's
Speaker 1: always a day. They said this, they said that, But
Speaker 1: thank god I didn't listen to them, because I learned
Speaker 1: a lot at Jackson State as well, and I graduated
Speaker 1: from grad school at the age of one, came out
Speaker 1: here and got right into the whole background standing and everything.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it was it's been a journey. I'm just blessed.
Speaker 1: You got a small guy. You know, you're over six ft, right,
Speaker 1: I'm six ft five and a half. Kay, Okay, that's
Speaker 1: the other thing. See, you want to see you on
Speaker 1: another level, you know a lot, because you know, a
Speaker 1: drummage that has to be at least six ft tall,
Speaker 1: And I didn't understand that for the A and M
Speaker 1: when I first saw them, those dudes, you want to
Speaker 1: it was like six nine because people have to see you.
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, cool, but they had after I left,
Speaker 1: they got a drum major. He was like five two
Speaker 1: or something. But you have to be tall, so people,
Speaker 1: but then you also have to be able to be
Speaker 1: tall and move and fluid because agrees what I'm saying
Speaker 1: that because see, you know, because college prepares you so
Speaker 1: so many things. And I'm just gonna read something saying
Speaker 1: that as a freshman you was a drum major at
Speaker 1: an HBCU mrs A Valley State. Okay, right there. You know,
Speaker 1: the the amount of confidence is overwhelming in a sense
Speaker 1: because you were blessed to be able to believe in yourself.
Speaker 1: Because now you're taking that same courage, the same I've been.
Speaker 1: I've been there before, I've been in front, I've been
Speaker 1: tested to l a and you're achieving a lot of success.
Speaker 1: Like I said, man, and I love what you said
Speaker 1: when people told you, hey, man, don't do back to back.
Speaker 1: HBC used people will drop in trying. That's why I
Speaker 1: was up the front. Don't let nobody getting your dreams
Speaker 1: or playing your future. Not your family, friends, coworkers, nobody.
Speaker 1: That's why I always said it up time and you
Speaker 1: you speak to truth right now, I'm telling you because
Speaker 1: if you let anybody put the price on you, everybody
Speaker 1: loves a clearance cell. They always gonna cheat you. So
Speaker 1: never let anybody tell you what you can't do. And
Speaker 1: if you if they tell you, know you're just speaking
Speaker 1: to the wrong person. So go found that person. Figure
Speaker 1: it out. But like you said, HBCUs taught me a lot.
Speaker 1: It taught me drive, It taught me focused, and it
Speaker 1: taught me never to take no for an answer. Um
Speaker 1: and always there's always a will. Where there's a will,
Speaker 1: there's a way, and hard work always pays off. So
Speaker 1: even when I got here, I wasn't thinking like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get discovered out of gas station. I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: where do I need? I know there's work to do.
Speaker 1: Where do I need to do? Where do I need
Speaker 1: to go to get that work to make sure I'm
Speaker 1: where I'm supposed to be. And I went Scott to
Speaker 1: acting classes and everything else and the rest is history. Okay. Cool?
Speaker 1: And the cool part about when we're talking here about
Speaker 1: your career, about going through this whole process of defining you,
Speaker 1: And that's what I love about when when when I
Speaker 1: try to bring people on the show like My My
Speaker 1: My Show airs on YouTube airors on Heart, but it
Speaker 1: also airs on nine HBCU campuses intentionally intentionally and uh
Speaker 1: and so when we talk about you man and representing
Speaker 1: and your philanthropy, because we're gonna go we're gonna get
Speaker 1: talking about a little Black Book. Of course, we're gonna
Speaker 1: talk about be positive. But I really wanted to talk
Speaker 1: about you because you're an inspiration brother, you know, inspiration
Speaker 1: and a very well timed inspiration. And and I want
Speaker 1: to go to the famous commercial because you six five
Speaker 1: now as motak you don't look six five. You look
Speaker 1: at five too because you ain't got no letter. You
Speaker 1: got it right here too, somebody. Yeah, the motor of
Speaker 1: it all. And it's so funny. I love the way
Speaker 1: that you say confidence because I felt like I didn't
Speaker 1: have a lot of confidence growing up. And that's why
Speaker 1: I wrote these books of um like Blackie came from
Speaker 1: me not liking my skin color. And so I say
Speaker 1: all that to say when I went out for the motor,
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm not doing this. This is crazy.
Speaker 1: They're not gonna pick me. Why Me and my best
Speaker 1: friend Jamaal Um He was like, tee, you gotta go.
Speaker 1: It was raining the l A and something like they
Speaker 1: don't be driving like gremlins in the rain. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna be driving like forty minutes outside. So I was, okay,
Speaker 1: let me just do it. And I went there and
Speaker 1: I did it and I got the call back, and um,
Speaker 1: the director was so amazing. The first thing he did
Speaker 1: he stood up, and that was unusual. He stood up
Speaker 1: and came to me before I auditioned and gave me
Speaker 1: a handshake, looked me in my eyes and told me like,
Speaker 1: there was only a couple of people I can see,
Speaker 1: and you was one that I knew I needed to
Speaker 1: see because of your confidence. And I'm like, oh, but
Speaker 1: there's a reason for everything. So if I didn't go
Speaker 1: through all the craziness and you know, the losses and
Speaker 1: getting all those elves and then having to grow, I
Speaker 1: would have not been the person I was, and you
Speaker 1: know the man who I am now to actually even
Speaker 1: get into the motor of it all because they said
Speaker 1: he exhumed confidence, and to me, I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: just being myself, right, yeah, because you have to be confident.
Speaker 1: You have man have motorcycles. You're really looking like who's
Speaker 1: looking at who are you in his word or in
Speaker 1: our world? But it's all that, but we got some
Speaker 1: amazing ones coming up on the fifth te Okay, you
Speaker 1: guys want to see a way more of his personalities. Okay, cool, Well,
Speaker 1: well let me know because I'm want to dropped that
Speaker 1: on my social and my news my weekly newsletter too.
Speaker 1: You know, because I will honor you, especially with the
Speaker 1: fact that you know, I knew in your in your
Speaker 1: bio is only mentions Mississippi Valley State. So I got
Speaker 1: a really honor you. You you're you're too tired hbc U.
Speaker 1: You know, so that that's the love I got to
Speaker 1: give you on that. But that's all I was just
Speaker 1: saying earlier, is that is that because HBCU and you
Speaker 1: being a drummy to prepared you and a lot of
Speaker 1: people trivialized things when it becomes part of your personality,
Speaker 1: part of your success story. And that's all that guy
Speaker 1: was saying when he walked up to you, he's and
Speaker 1: you're confident, and then it's been so built into you
Speaker 1: going out there, going out knowing what you had to do.
Speaker 1: Did you said you was a freshman knowing what you
Speaker 1: had to give? Now I was like, okay, you can
Speaker 1: do March God. Yeah, I'm telling your best Mr Terrence direct,
Speaker 1: but you don't do it is best with me, brother,
Speaker 1: what because because the beauty of you, man is that
Speaker 1: is when I when I look at your career. You know,
Speaker 1: we're going to the Bosh, your Amazon, you know, Batwoman,
Speaker 1: you know, the First Wives Club, you know, comedy, you know,
Speaker 1: and then you're playing a character that's not real. You're
Speaker 1: seeing through it, but you make it real. Because I
Speaker 1: remember how I told my wife. I said, baby, I
Speaker 1: was like a kid, I'm gonna interview Mota. She said.
Speaker 1: I said, the black dude who's half man half see
Speaker 1: that phool man and been such a blessing. Because the
Speaker 1: funny thing is the grown men. I see grown men
Speaker 1: now they go crazy about it. So a lot of
Speaker 1: people think I'm Lebron James. When I have my mask
Speaker 1: for the guy follows and I always get like a
Speaker 1: random person followed me through the grocery store. The guy
Speaker 1: followed me, I was here we go again, and he
Speaker 1: keen James and I took my mask off. I said no,
Speaker 1: I did take it off. I said no. He just
Speaker 1: stood there like, let me see my mask off and
Speaker 1: he screamed, you're so he wouldn't leave. I took a
Speaker 1: bit with him. But it's like you get the big
Speaker 1: motorcycle guys, tattoos, the beers. Oh my god, you're the Moltore,
Speaker 1: You're the Moldtour. So it's it's so cool. It's so
Speaker 1: it's just a blessing to be you know, A right.
Speaker 1: I didn't. I wouldn't never thought. You know, you come
Speaker 1: out here, you just think you want to do one thing.
Speaker 1: I just want to be on a show or just
Speaker 1: one show, Give me one show. And that year I
Speaker 1: was like, just give me one commercial. I end up
Speaker 1: doing five and two days and then now it's up
Speaker 1: to almost twenty eight commercials with that amazing it's all,
Speaker 1: it's just all been amazing riding. I think I know
Speaker 1: the reason I'm blessed because I continue to give even
Speaker 1: when I may not even have. But at the same time,
Speaker 1: I know how special this is to being in space,
Speaker 1: so I never take anything for granted. Every time I
Speaker 1: put on that w B LIT I used to watch
Speaker 1: that when I was a child, So pulling onto those
Speaker 1: gates every day of the week, it's like I really
Speaker 1: just I just know I'm blessed. And I know you know,
Speaker 1: I've been there man doing Jamie Foxx, you know, pull
Speaker 1: it up on therer man. And because very few people
Speaker 1: allowing that gate, brother, you know that, you know you're
Speaker 1: walking the gags. Very few of us, you know, in
Speaker 1: those gates. And so I've been on Paramount Lot, W
Speaker 1: B Lot, you know all the Sony lots, you know
Speaker 1: all those blocks. Man, when they say your name and
Speaker 1: then you come on there so much I go on
Speaker 1: by Terrence, you know, that's when you go, yeah, man,
Speaker 1: this is just the feeling I want to keep, just
Speaker 1: the feeling I want to have because that's that's that's
Speaker 1: a very small club, tarantine and you know that about club,
Speaker 1: and it's a even with the show. This this is
Speaker 1: a real life and it feels so good because every
Speaker 1: character I've been blessed to play it's a mirror to
Speaker 1: real people. And my grandmother was one of dialysis dressed
Speaker 1: like Diana Ross and she will always say she's making
Speaker 1: dialysis entertaining, like how that, what's what? And so now
Speaker 1: I'm literally making dialysis educating people every week, but making
Speaker 1: it entertaining as well. So it's all it's it's but
Speaker 1: at the same time, I know it's a responsibility. So
Speaker 1: even walking I might be going too deep, but even
Speaker 1: walking on there, I'm like, wow, like the Sydney Portier's
Speaker 1: and all these amazing people paved the way for me
Speaker 1: to be here. So I take every day very very
Speaker 1: serious and that I'm in the space to allow more
Speaker 1: space for us. Absolutely, and you have to because you know,
Speaker 1: and you know the reason I really enjoyed talking to you.
Speaker 1: You know, first of all, I want to congratulate you
Speaker 1: on the daytime Emmy, I'll standing support the actor. The
Speaker 1: digital drives over there and you know what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: And I tell people all the time I introduced a
Speaker 1: all the people they'll say, nominated five times, nominated for
Speaker 1: or Image Award. You know what I'm saying. You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So I know, dude, when you win one,
Speaker 1: you best put that in your bio because it's rand.
Speaker 1: It's right. They introduced how they gotta be like Emmy Award.
Speaker 1: Because I'm still very humbles, I'm like you want to
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh yeah, yeah. When I get introduced Emmy
Speaker 1: Award where actor, it's like, oh, I'm I can't. I
Speaker 1: interview a lot of people nominated for Grammy named nominated
Speaker 1: for and in me, dude, I said, I'm telling you
Speaker 1: had the longest bio I've ever read. But I said
Speaker 1: to I gotta tell everybody's story. I'm not I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna leave anything out. I'm not gonna short change you
Speaker 1: because I knew you. Knew assist. So I don't know
Speaker 1: you personally, but your journey needs to be told. And
Speaker 1: when I when I see these things like you know,
Speaker 1: daytime in me in the drama series, that's what about,
Speaker 1: we're just telling no, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't slutch
Speaker 1: that I introduced too many people in this show. Just
Speaker 1: say nominated as a critic. Okay, he's one. Okay. And
Speaker 1: so because I did that too, I remember, I remember
Speaker 1: I actually lost one of my Image Awards. You know,
Speaker 1: I lost it, you know what I'm saying because I
Speaker 1: didn't understand. My head was down, just grinding, grinding, grinding.
Speaker 1: So so I tell people I want two Image I
Speaker 1: want three Image Awards, but all those one because I
Speaker 1: don't know where it's that you know. And now, man,
Speaker 1: because when I won that because I was the first
Speaker 1: one I won, and I didn't feel to see the
Speaker 1: value in it until now. So when you said mines
Speaker 1: right there, hey brother, you damn right is right there
Speaker 1: because you want you want. That keeps me humble though,
Speaker 1: because even after I wanted my manager Klein, she was.
Speaker 1: She drove me home because I was tired. I was
Speaker 1: on eight planes that week. Jess wrapped a show I
Speaker 1: was doing at four am in Atlanta. I got on
Speaker 1: the plane at six, got here at twelve, got dressed,
Speaker 1: got on his on his red car of it one Emmy,
Speaker 1: and came right back home and went to sleep, and
Speaker 1: got back on the plane and left the next day.
Speaker 1: So it was it was a whirlwind. And I remember
Speaker 1: being in a car where her We're driving and she's like,
Speaker 1: and the immage huge, just like this big exct it
Speaker 1: had in a huge box. And she's like, you know,
Speaker 1: you gotta work even harder now. And I'm like, can
Speaker 1: I just get a couple of seconds to breathe? And
Speaker 1: she's like, no, You're gonna have to work even harder
Speaker 1: because people donna think that you think you don't have
Speaker 1: the audition to do anything else. And I'm like, oh no,
Speaker 1: never that, but that comes from the hbc U mindset. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean it's like, okay, cool, thank you so much.
Speaker 1: We got that, but we there's so much more to go.
Speaker 1: I'm talking to the star, Terence Terrail. You know double
Speaker 1: HBCU are you know? Star? The series Be Positive of CBS,
Speaker 1: produced by the incredible Chuck laury Um. Just just just
Speaker 1: google his name, you go. This brother's blessed, tears was
Speaker 1: blessed and he told so the infamous black people. Listen up,
Speaker 1: He's talk. But let's talk about your character. Be Positive man.
Speaker 1: You know you're an athlete. You know that really kind
Speaker 1: of like being humbled by this being on dialysis talk
Speaker 1: about you because you really, you know, when these characters,
Speaker 1: you know, when they have a lot of lines, a
Speaker 1: lot are not? A lot are not? You still have
Speaker 1: to be able to, you know, give a range and
Speaker 1: give a thought process to where the characters is. You
Speaker 1: already got the natural bills, so you look like an athlete.
Speaker 1: In fact, you actually carried the lead out of one episode.
Speaker 1: How small as this guy a pounds was so funny
Speaker 1: because they said you have picked up so literally. I
Speaker 1: wasn't trying to, like, I didn't know until I watched
Speaker 1: it that I threw him up in the air like,
Speaker 1: but when I saw he came, I threw him in
Speaker 1: the area. But it's so funny because in high school
Speaker 1: and you know, you go through these different things, and
Speaker 1: I was skinny in my head, always been this side
Speaker 1: since I was five. I always look like ahead looking thing.
Speaker 1: So I started gaining weight and getting bigger. I got
Speaker 1: hit one time playing football in high school and I quit.
Speaker 1: I never played, so now so ironic, I get a
Speaker 1: football roll and then I get to, you know, shine
Speaker 1: a light on my grandmother's actual journey through dialysis. And
Speaker 1: like you said, it's it's a lot of working multi cam.
Speaker 1: I've done single cam, I've done drama. Those are literally
Speaker 1: a walk in apart compared to multi camp multi cam.
Speaker 1: I'm on set, we're practicing Monday through Wednesday, and then
Speaker 1: we shoot Wednesday night. We shoot Thursday and Friday. So
Speaker 1: you're working and you're acting from your toes all the
Speaker 1: way up to your head, so you're exhausted that night.
Speaker 1: So it's a whole different type of sport. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: a sport. Multi cam is like going to the Olympics.
Speaker 1: It's like you have to especially if there's a live audience,
Speaker 1: so you have to make the joke. Hold the joke,
Speaker 1: because you gotta think about when people laugh, you gotta
Speaker 1: come back into the next line with the same energy
Speaker 1: that you left off without dropping. It's a lot because
Speaker 1: I've done multi can you know, Rode and produced Jamie
Speaker 1: Foxx and Sister Sister, so I know it's a lot
Speaker 1: of work. And even if you're not in that moment
Speaker 1: on camera, you gotta stay there because the camera's only Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think I was gonna said last week and we
Speaker 1: did three weeks straight, usually two weeks on, two weeks,
Speaker 1: one week off. We did three weeks straight and I
Speaker 1: was doing my scene with an elite and they said, okay, hole,
Speaker 1: Terence moved for the light. I saw her lights. He like,
Speaker 1: no to you, there's two cameras over. Let's talk about
Speaker 1: your book, man. I don't want to leave this interview
Speaker 1: without talking about what's like I said, you know, we
Speaker 1: go through these things and we um we forget how
Speaker 1: we got where we are, and I feel like you
Speaker 1: never can forget where you You have to see where
Speaker 1: you were to know where you're going. So when I
Speaker 1: first started these books, I was very you know, in
Speaker 1: the South, we don't go to therapy. We go to church.
Speaker 1: So I end up morning therapy getting some stuff out,
Speaker 1: and I realized that I had a lot of insecurities
Speaker 1: from childhood, so I didn't like my skin color. I
Speaker 1: told you about that story. So then I wrote a
Speaker 1: book about a little dark boy lawns what melanin is.
Speaker 1: It's called Blackie, which I've been called, but I turned
Speaker 1: into the acronyms be loving the during Karen and kind
Speaker 1: of yourself about loving yourself, so for little black boys,
Speaker 1: showing them that their kings um. And then I wrote
Speaker 1: the second one after my mother pass and she's Superheroes
Speaker 1: every day, educates us on DNA. Then the fourth third
Speaker 1: book right here we go the Crown kids were bringing
Speaker 1: all the kids together. And then this last book happened
Speaker 1: after the George Floyd. Um I was. I'm a mentor
Speaker 1: for Mrs Tina Knows loss In and Mr Richard Tina's
Speaker 1: Angels and Richard's Law Warriors, and we had the week
Speaker 1: of George Floyd. The kids we had we meet with
Speaker 1: them every Monday and they were crying like a Just
Speaker 1: imagine eighty kids in the zoom call. You see these
Speaker 1: indows and you can't touch them and hug him and
Speaker 1: let them know it's gonna be okay because of the pandemic.
Speaker 1: And they were crying and I'm turning my chair. I'm crying,
Speaker 1: as Teena's crying. Everybody's crying, and um, the Asian one
Speaker 1: of the little girls just like, are they'll kill me
Speaker 1: because of my I'm black, you know, and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: be on the news and get shot down because I'm black.
Speaker 1: And I just remember leaving that meeting like what I'm
Speaker 1: not doing enough. I'm not doing enough. I need to
Speaker 1: show them that they're special that, you know, And um,
Speaker 1: skin beat came up where when I tried to wash
Speaker 1: my skin color off, and so that's when I knew
Speaker 1: animated short that we're going up on Oscar for. And
Speaker 1: then my Little Black Book, where I'm educating the kids
Speaker 1: on different things like you know, the Selver Marsh but
Speaker 1: also all these amazing inventors you know where in the
Speaker 1: world would literally be dark, you know, because we were
Speaker 1: responsible for the lightbulb as well. So so my Little
Speaker 1: Black Book. So it's a series of book and the
Speaker 1: whole brand is called I Crowned Me because we don't
Speaker 1: need to wait for anybody to tell us we're special.
Speaker 1: You crown yourself and you tell yourself you're special because
Speaker 1: in the book, the kids don't get any special powers.
Speaker 1: The power comes from self love and self worth. At
Speaker 1: the same time, I knew I had to own it,
Speaker 1: so I own all my books, self published them, so
Speaker 1: I own them right out. So money, money making conversations, right,
Speaker 1: I got my ownership because we don't get top half
Speaker 1: of the stuff that other people already know from from birth.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't even know what an investment account
Speaker 1: was until a couple of days ago. I'm still learning.
Speaker 1: But we just have to open our minds to different things,
Speaker 1: like how can we get this book? Is it on
Speaker 1: your website? Yeah? Here we go, money make coming right,
Speaker 1: So you go to iicrown me dot com, which is
Speaker 1: my website. At first, I wanted to be on Amazon
Speaker 1: all these other stuff. But Amazon takes fifty to seventy
Speaker 1: percent of your money if you sell on there. So
Speaker 1: I'm like, So I saw a hundred and something books
Speaker 1: there and I remember getting a check for less than
Speaker 1: two hundred dollars. This is my work. Why am I
Speaker 1: getting you seventy per cent of my work? And all
Speaker 1: y'all doing is put on website. So I was like,
Speaker 1: let me do my own upsite and make sure you
Speaker 1: know efficient and so and plus I like to sign
Speaker 1: each book and let the kids know that I see
Speaker 1: them physically. It's a lot of work, but I did
Speaker 1: it that way so I can own my own stuff.
Speaker 1: And now with these conversations coming up this week with
Speaker 1: dream Works and all these amazing people who want to
Speaker 1: buy into my bucks or create the series out of it,
Speaker 1: I it's just me. I don't have to worry about
Speaker 1: a room full of people who own part of my work.
Speaker 1: It's just me. I own everything all the way down
Speaker 1: to the eyebrows. I love it, man, And you know
Speaker 1: the beauty of this interview, Man, it's just talking about
Speaker 1: a self built person. You know what I'm saying, motivated
Speaker 1: by and not denied by who you are, because we
Speaker 1: all get those those those people who those people who
Speaker 1: try to I call him to step into your dream
Speaker 1: and making an ugly experience. And you're saying, right now,
Speaker 1: your size wasn't gonna stop you. Where you was born
Speaker 1: weren't gonna stop you. Your color, your skin wasn't gonna
Speaker 1: stop you. Then you flip the switch and you're there
Speaker 1: for people who don't look like you. Yeah, we have to.
Speaker 1: We have to give it back. And we can't fight this,
Speaker 1: this these crazy times with hate. We can't fight the
Speaker 1: quote unquote racist with Hey, we have to fight them
Speaker 1: with love and education. So you can't thought somebody for
Speaker 1: being ignorant to a subject, you know, I mean, we
Speaker 1: can educate them on that subject. And after you do
Speaker 1: what you After I give your information, you do what
Speaker 1: you want with it. But I've done my part in
Speaker 1: this moment. So we just have to leave with love.
Speaker 1: And I really really believe in that and everything that
Speaker 1: you're going through. You know that's happening for a reason.
Speaker 1: So the single mom, been on warfare, food stamps, all
Speaker 1: that stuff built character for me. Now, so I know
Speaker 1: that all of that happened for a reason. So you
Speaker 1: have to walk and cry. You don't get to sit
Speaker 1: and cry. You gotta walk and cry. CBS. Be positive.
Speaker 1: That's the perfect name for who you are. Brother. You
Speaker 1: are positive. When I just said it and just looked
Speaker 1: at you smiling, when he couldn't be on the better
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Speaker 1: This was like yeah, what he can actually stop straight
Speaker 1: to the top. Amazing, he's rich man, And so again
Speaker 1: I want to I'm gonna put the link into my
Speaker 1: newsletter because I'm gonna I'm gonna send you some direct
Speaker 1: money making conversations. People did it. I'm gonna dropping in there.
Speaker 1: But more importantly, man, uh, I'm looking forward to the commercials.
Speaker 1: Tell your team to get back to new Mortar commercials
Speaker 1: so I can get on my social media and just
Speaker 1: start helping you promote your brand because, as they say,
Speaker 1: you be positive, brother, because you stay positive because you're
Speaker 1: all positive. Okay, thank you for doing what you're doing.
Speaker 1: Thank you for keeping This is the best energey ride
Speaker 1: I ever had. You did a drum major movie, So
Speaker 1: I'm good. This is made bay that. Hey, hey man,
Speaker 1: who what? Black dude? Who? Who? I did? Thank you
Speaker 1: got it going on? Didn't want to be you, didn't
Speaker 1: want to be you? Go hold hey, I'm getting something.
Speaker 1: I love you boy man again, brother, thank you for
Speaker 1: changing your set right you came with the fire. I
Speaker 1: was like, hold up, now, you ain't about to get me.
Speaker 1: Let me gonna switch. I'll be right there. Again. Man,
Speaker 1: I love you brother, and know that on you. I'm
Speaker 1: on your list and get this stuff I asked of you,
Speaker 1: and uh, because I want to sell some of your books.
Speaker 1: You're more important that one. To just keep pumping you up,
Speaker 1: because Bro, you fight, you fight, Thank you, and thank
Speaker 1: you for all your love your energy. Man, there's nobody
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Speaker 1: States Forest Service and the act gat So my next guests,
Speaker 1: two dynamic people are Patrice Covington and Rebecca Naomi Jones.
Speaker 1: They acclaimed actresses and singers co starring the cast of
Speaker 1: Genius Aretha as Irma and Caroline Franklin. My older sister's
Speaker 1: name is Carolin, so I love Carolin. Patrice Covington is
Speaker 1: an Emmy Award winning actress, singer, teacher, author and model.
Speaker 1: Rebecca naoed with Jones and is currently featuring in Those
Speaker 1: niecksun Road one national campaign You've seen that Tearing Enough stuff.
Speaker 1: She has also performing in solo concerts at Lincoln Center,
Speaker 1: American Soul Book, and Apollo Cafe. They're dynamic in this
Speaker 1: series Genius. I saw it in this compelling and I've
Speaker 1: lived that lifestyle from a musical set and let's tell
Speaker 1: you about a little background what the Genius series is
Speaker 1: all about. It's an Emmy or war whin the anthology
Speaker 1: series where they dramatized and fascinating stories behind brilliant innovators.
Speaker 1: In this case was Aretha Franklin and h These two
Speaker 1: young ladies. I won't say they're young because they're younger
Speaker 1: than me and opening now offended by the term young
Speaker 1: ladies as they're being cast in the role of playing
Speaker 1: Aretha's sisters, which can be very frustrated in life. You know,
Speaker 1: it's like being the sister brother to Tiger Woods or
Speaker 1: lebron Ja and still participating in that sport. So because
Speaker 1: both of them are talented singers, and in a sense
Speaker 1: it was to me as I introduced them, and there
Speaker 1: were many layers of stories that I could love to
Speaker 1: go back and just hear their story. I can go
Speaker 1: back and just hear a story about c L Aretha's father,
Speaker 1: but this story is about Rita and her genius. Please
Speaker 1: working the money making conversations, Patrice Covington and Rebecca Naomi Jumps,
Speaker 1: thank you, thank you for having us. Well, you know,
Speaker 1: first of all, um, this first time we talked. But
Speaker 1: but when you see seven episodes. Uh, in the series
Speaker 1: is eight episodes. You tend to see and and and
Speaker 1: and and first of all, being engaged by the talent,
Speaker 1: the singing talent. Let's let's start there, because that's a
Speaker 1: gift God gave you. And in this series, you know,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out are they seen out they
Speaker 1: live singing? You know, were they really singing? When you start?
Speaker 1: I felt when you were in that scene where y'all
Speaker 1: were standing next to the piano and you were playing
Speaker 1: it and you were singing, I felt that you guys
Speaker 1: are actually singing that moment, it was I right or wrong?
Speaker 1: You're right, so so. And in a series where there
Speaker 1: is so driven by singing, how did these audition opportunities
Speaker 1: come up to you? Guys? You can answer separately because
Speaker 1: it's it's it's a it's all you have to say.
Speaker 1: When you start building your resume. This is a resume builder.
Speaker 1: This is a resume you put up and go okay, wow.
Speaker 1: I was part of that. Because it is an amazing
Speaker 1: anthology series and it plays out over a series of time.
Speaker 1: You have to age a little bit, You have to
Speaker 1: be a little younger than what you really are so
Speaker 1: starting with you, Rebecca, talk about the whole process of
Speaker 1: coming on board. Sure, I remember that the audition came
Speaker 1: to my table at a time when I had a
Speaker 1: whole lot of other auditions showing up as well. It
Speaker 1: was must have been Pilot's season, because it was a
Speaker 1: really busy time, and this was the only one that
Speaker 1: I had this particular week that was a taped audition
Speaker 1: instead of a live in person audition with casting. And
Speaker 1: I remember I felt really swamped, and my boyfriend said,
Speaker 1: maybe you shouldn't do this one because it says Caroline
Speaker 1: as tall. But you know, something told me that I
Speaker 1: should make the tape happen because I saw that Susan
Speaker 1: Laurie Parks was attached to it, and she I've known
Speaker 1: for many years in theater, and because I knew that
Speaker 1: the role required somebody who could sing um, and so
Speaker 1: I thought, there are a couple of things that are
Speaker 1: not my height that could potentially give me a leg
Speaker 1: up into this work. And um, you know, I actually
Speaker 1: said this to someone earlier today. What I loved was
Speaker 1: that I didn't know anything about Caroline Franklin or Irma
Speaker 1: Franklin before getting to work on this material, and Um,
Speaker 1: I loved the audition scene because, um, it was a
Speaker 1: long scene that took place, uh during Aretha Franklin's fiftieth birthday,
Speaker 1: and it's between the two sisters, and just this scene
Speaker 1: between the two of them gives you so much information
Speaker 1: about these sisters, but also their relationship with Aretha and
Speaker 1: their relationship with their father and their family as a whole.
Speaker 1: And you get a sense in this material of how
Speaker 1: much they love each other and love their sister, but
Speaker 1: also um that there is a lot of resentment and
Speaker 1: business and complexity that is present in all relationships and
Speaker 1: all families. Um So, yeah, it was. It was a
Speaker 1: really fun audition to do. And I got to do
Speaker 1: an acapella version of rock Steady, which is one of
Speaker 1: my favorite reathons and yes, yes, yes, and yeah. So
Speaker 1: it was a great time. And then I got to
Speaker 1: do my screen test in person and it was a
Speaker 1: lot of fun, and you know, I was I was
Speaker 1: hoping I got the job, but of course I felt like, um,
Speaker 1: the audition experience itself was actually so satisfying that if
Speaker 1: I didn't, I did my best and I would let
Speaker 1: it go. But I left out petreats. Now, you know,
Speaker 1: let's not be casual about this when you say singing. Now, see,
Speaker 1: you had to sing the same thing as they say
Speaker 1: in the in the Black Household. You could sang girl
Speaker 1: or sang because because at point, you know, like I said,
Speaker 1: this movie wasn't based on lip sinking. You know, you
Speaker 1: had to deliver and then also you had to deliver
Speaker 1: a level as to why these ladies could be somewhat
Speaker 1: jealous of not getting the same opportunities that Areta was getting. Okay,
Speaker 1: you know, y'all equally attractive, you know, but but she
Speaker 1: had a certain extra in her. So talk about your
Speaker 1: audition practice and bringing that character of Irma to the
Speaker 1: to the stage. Yeah, sure so. Um I also loved
Speaker 1: that audition sing Rebecca. It was such a good one, um,
Speaker 1: and it really pulled me and pulled in my interest. Well,
Speaker 1: I was also interested in all jobs at the time
Speaker 1: there was I wasn't interested in, but I was particularly
Speaker 1: interested in this one because at the time I was
Speaker 1: actually on tour singing background for Christina Aguilera in Vegas,
Speaker 1: and I was in the Las Vegas hotel room. It
Speaker 1: was a very hectic time. Much like Rebecca. Um mine
Speaker 1: was just that we were heard so much, um, and
Speaker 1: we were traveling so much. I had no time, like
Speaker 1: zero time at all to get this done. I had
Speaker 1: no idea, and I'm also on the road with band guys.
Speaker 1: How am I going to get this done? You know,
Speaker 1: Like they don't know how to do a self taped audition,
Speaker 1: you know. And so thankfully one of my background singing partners,
Speaker 1: he has a wife who was an actress and she
Speaker 1: had trained him up to know how to do a
Speaker 1: self tape. So I was like, please help me, and
Speaker 1: he helped me. We did it. It's probably the quickest
Speaker 1: audition I've ever done because I just simply didn't have
Speaker 1: the time to analyze the critique, like why did I
Speaker 1: do that? And I wish I wouldn't have looked that way,
Speaker 1: and oh my god, my hair looks dumb or whatever.
Speaker 1: I didn't have time to do those things because I
Speaker 1: was so busy. And so with all that being said,
Speaker 1: it was the most evident and most clear time that
Speaker 1: I've ever had something be what's for me? It's just
Speaker 1: for me. It would never have passed me by because
Speaker 1: I didn't have to, you know, analyze and do the
Speaker 1: most with this tape. So um, you know, I am
Speaker 1: forever grateful. This is my very first time on TV
Speaker 1: period and had to row. I've done other things, uh,
Speaker 1: like you know, promos for Broadway shows and such, but uh,
Speaker 1: this is my first time on camera and I'm for
Speaker 1: ever grateful for this moment. And you're stepped out there girl.
Speaker 1: Now the beautiful smile. You stepped out there now and
Speaker 1: in the in this series. Now, Carolyn, your character really
Speaker 1: wanted to be a reader. I like to believe you
Speaker 1: you really challenge the norm because the dad who was
Speaker 1: c All, who was known as the million Dollar Boys
Speaker 1: uh in Detroit, saw her as the as the prodigy.
Speaker 1: He are is the one and the legacy builder now
Speaker 1: in the building that these characters, because you have to
Speaker 1: kind of have a sense of background information and where
Speaker 1: you're gonna take the character, not overstep with the characters,
Speaker 1: is to deliver what you wanted to compete naturally. Talk
Speaker 1: about that process and making it real. Well, I think, um,
Speaker 1: you know, as an actress of a certain level who
Speaker 1: has um, you know, done a lot of exciting roles
Speaker 1: on Broadway, UM, and done some versions of some some
Speaker 1: levels of roles on TV and film. UM, But it's
Speaker 1: still in the process of you know, building a career.
Speaker 1: I think a lot of what both Patrise and I
Speaker 1: were tasked to portray is something that comes naturally for us,
Speaker 1: because it is such a journey when you believe you
Speaker 1: have something inside of you to offer, and in some
Speaker 1: ways that dream is um. You know, that dream is
Speaker 1: happy and for you, it's it's coming true and in
Speaker 1: some ways you're still sort of building it and UM
Speaker 1: and and manifesting it and dreaming it and UM. And
Speaker 1: I think that these characters really have that. I don't
Speaker 1: think they necessarily wanted to be Aretha, but I think
Speaker 1: they wanted. I think they wanted to be Irma. They
Speaker 1: wanted to be Caroline, and they wanted to have all
Speaker 1: of the opportunity that Aretha had. And I think, UM,
Speaker 1: I think that desire and that deep yearning UM, you know,
Speaker 1: for your potential to be realized and for your um
Speaker 1: star power to be realized is something that we can
Speaker 1: sort of easily, you know, dig into and to to
Speaker 1: on UM. But yeah, I think, uh, you know, I
Speaker 1: think it's also very natural for me to want to
Speaker 1: dig into this role. My father was also a musician
Speaker 1: who passed away before realizing all of his dreams and
Speaker 1: it's it was, it was something that just felt right.
Speaker 1: Now when I want to listen to this PATRICI, She's like,
Speaker 1: just you're talking about this series of an anthology series,
Speaker 1: eight episodes. You know that from forty five minutes, I
Speaker 1: think the longest episode maybe fifty something minutes. But never,
Speaker 1: never did I feel tax and watching this series. Why
Speaker 1: would you think someone would want to watch an anthology
Speaker 1: series want to reach your Franklin. There's so much to
Speaker 1: uncover about this woman. Her music is truly inbedded in
Speaker 1: the fabric of our lives. And we know that we
Speaker 1: love her music. We know she was the Queen and
Speaker 1: that there's no one better. But her story is so complex,
Speaker 1: it's so multifaceted, it's so beautiful, it's so sad at times.
Speaker 1: It's full of overcoming and conquering, it's full of sisterhood,
Speaker 1: all things that we all need encouragement with all the time. Um,
Speaker 1: what we get to unfold a lot of is about her,
Speaker 1: how act of her activism was. Right now, everybody's trying
Speaker 1: to figure out how to be an activist in their
Speaker 1: own right and whatever it is that they can do,
Speaker 1: and so it's encouraging in your real life right now
Speaker 1: is so much to learn and so much to apply
Speaker 1: to your life. You know, it's really amazing because I
Speaker 1: want to get into some of the cast members because
Speaker 1: they were a serious like this great has to be
Speaker 1: carried by talent. You are two very talented individuals that
Speaker 1: still out in this series. Then you go to my
Speaker 1: man Cordin to be Vans who played cl WHOA Okay,
Speaker 1: that's a that's a whole They could have did an
Speaker 1: eight episode doc on on his behind because he I'm
Speaker 1: gonna tell yourself, just watch the series to see the
Speaker 1: dad just what just wants to see her for the dad,
Speaker 1: because the dad gonna mess you up. Seal Franklin is
Speaker 1: gonna mess you up as a preacher. He breaks all
Speaker 1: the preacher rules. He breaks all of the preacher rules.
Speaker 1: If they has the rules for preachers and your p K.
Speaker 1: He gonna he gonna make you want to get be
Speaker 1: a drug addict. He gonna make you want to just
Speaker 1: go into detox for life. This man, yeah, is I
Speaker 1: ain't never met a preacher like giving my life. He
Speaker 1: was caught, uh womanizer. He was a part of I
Speaker 1: said he was all part womanizer. He was somewhat of
Speaker 1: a drug. He uh, he spent the parishioner's money at will.
Speaker 1: He was he was special. Now that's that's courting to
Speaker 1: be fair and my wrong, ladies, did I tell you
Speaker 1: are correct me? If I TV, y'all feel free to sean.
Speaker 1: Now you lying, you're stretching the twoth Okay, now Wexler
Speaker 1: you know Wexler was that, you know, the always a
Speaker 1: white man. That was his character. I tell telling black
Speaker 1: folks what to do, pushing you know, I don't think
Speaker 1: that's a good move. You might always think about their pocketbook,
Speaker 1: but not worrying about the cause. That was my man
Speaker 1: playing the Wexler character. He was. He was incredible, his talents,
Speaker 1: he was He's an original test It was really interesting
Speaker 1: when I saw the because I saw their reader special
Speaker 1: when she the documentary. I saw that. It was just
Speaker 1: so amazing. And I'm gonna ask you guys, an't the
Speaker 1: other one you can answer this? Would you? You know,
Speaker 1: I've seen history. I've lived the history of frankly to
Speaker 1: you know, Jet magazine, Ebony songs. When you guys were
Speaker 1: going through the process and and certain information was being
Speaker 1: revealed to you, how did you react to it? Um? Well,
Speaker 1: I think that, you know, some things we still don't
Speaker 1: really know the answers to. You know, there's a lot
Speaker 1: that is still just left to the healer. Uh. You know,
Speaker 1: there's some things that will just never know. Um. And
Speaker 1: I mean I've heard rumors of certain things all my
Speaker 1: life now, my life, of my adult life, you know.
Speaker 1: And and at that point it was quite shocking to
Speaker 1: me to learn that everything had a baby at twelve
Speaker 1: years old. Um. Those types of stories are always going
Speaker 1: to be shocking to someone who's like the queen of soul.
Speaker 1: Like you know, I grew up with her music. I
Speaker 1: knew it was gospel music, and you know, her foundation
Speaker 1: was was church. So it's definitely shocking. I think that
Speaker 1: there's so much more to her life though, and what's
Speaker 1: more important is how she overcame and continued to overcome
Speaker 1: until she got out of here, like always overcoming. I
Speaker 1: think that's the most important part. Yeah, I had to
Speaker 1: fortunate because Steve Harvey and I have managed it for
Speaker 1: sixty years. I had the blessing of me reading several times.
Speaker 1: And she really did cook fried chicken, by the way.
Speaker 1: I knew that for a fact. But the woman could
Speaker 1: cook okay, and she loved popcorn too, by the way,
Speaker 1: So when you when you look at a movie like
Speaker 1: Cynthia Rival who starred in the lead role, and you see,
Speaker 1: so I fell in love with and Harriet. I saw
Speaker 1: that booby Harriet when she started Harriet Tubman, and I
Speaker 1: got the opportunity to see how she effortlessly um played
Speaker 1: this role. You know, you know when you see a
Speaker 1: talent like that, and you know, because we all compare
Speaker 1: ourselves and say, wow, how does that work? How did
Speaker 1: I give me some feedback on watching the talent like
Speaker 1: that because we all have aspirations to be that lead
Speaker 1: and then seeing her go through the process of aging,
Speaker 1: going through she was she was physically abused, she was
Speaker 1: you know, she was she was you know, it was
Speaker 1: her relationship with Dr Martin Luther King. She had that
Speaker 1: in that process, being a spiritual leader, being a physical leader,
Speaker 1: being a being uh you know, dealing with what happened
Speaker 1: to her mom in real life. She had She had
Speaker 1: a see that emotion through the process as well as
Speaker 1: overall you know, disconnect with her dad. It was a disconnect,
Speaker 1: you know. Then her grandmother, played by the incredible Paul
Speaker 1: At of Washington. I can't forget not giving her compliments
Speaker 1: because she was awesome knowna for many years, So give me,
Speaker 1: give me some feedback, and you know your take on
Speaker 1: it as well. You know, one thing that I loved
Speaker 1: watching Cynthia was that I think she really was able
Speaker 1: to dig into um, sort of the quiet self protection
Speaker 1: that Areta had. I think, um, you know, we were
Speaker 1: also lucky to receive um Aretha's you know, Aretha's sort
Speaker 1: of entire soul through her voice, her singing voice, and
Speaker 1: her music in general and her genius. But um, you know,
Speaker 1: as we all know she's she was a very private
Speaker 1: person by design and UM, and I think Cynthia really
Speaker 1: locked into that aspect of her. I think she was
Speaker 1: really smart about how she was on set and how
Speaker 1: she dug into this character because she was very quiet
Speaker 1: about it. She didn't she didn't overly, um, talk too
Speaker 1: much about it. I think she kept a lot of
Speaker 1: her work um internal and um. And then we got
Speaker 1: to see it sort of slowly unravel out of her
Speaker 1: the way Aretha was in terms of her allowing people
Speaker 1: to slowly, um, you know, be let in to who
Speaker 1: she was. And so the same thing happens with Cynthia,
Speaker 1: where suddenly she's singing and this voice opens up and
Speaker 1: we're getting a real sense of who she is right now,
Speaker 1: you know, And I can't forget T. I T Tip
Speaker 1: was that boy right there and that he does comedy?
Speaker 1: Well he I know he could wrapped, but he was
Speaker 1: he was you know, I was just he was sexy.
Speaker 1: He was six. I'm coming there. Look at that the
Speaker 1: little mustache and little afro. He was working it. He
Speaker 1: was working it with that little deep was T. I
Speaker 1: was T. I was on Bart in the series and
Speaker 1: my boy Luke James, he dipped in and then a
Speaker 1: guy gonna tell y'all know character. I was just gonna
Speaker 1: let y'all know T Eyes in the Bad Boy he clouds.
Speaker 1: Luke James coming there, super sexy you no chocolate drop,
Speaker 1: chocolate drop. We had a very fun day with him.
Speaker 1: You know, you guys, your characters are you know, there's
Speaker 1: let's let's talk about that stepping back and win and
Speaker 1: those uh those time you know, complying clothes, you know,
Speaker 1: the bathing suit that you're wearing there, you know, at
Speaker 1: the pool side with a Wretha and your character, you know,
Speaker 1: you're up there, that nice little outfit singing them songs.
Speaker 1: I'm thinking to Caroline, they fine, you know, I'm going
Speaker 1: back because I was. I was active in those years,
Speaker 1: like going like oh they could work and they could work.
Speaker 1: So how about fun did you guys have going into
Speaker 1: the wardrobe? Rou most fun? Most fun? Jennifer Briant, our
Speaker 1: costume designer. I just you know, every time I went
Speaker 1: into a fitting, it was my whole thing was a
Speaker 1: going joke because I would say, okay, no, this is
Speaker 1: my favorite. Every time it was my favorite outfit. Um.
Speaker 1: I loved her designs. I felt comfortable, I felt cute,
Speaker 1: I felt sexy. I loved how we grew. You know,
Speaker 1: our fashions grew with us, um but still was appropriate,
Speaker 1: you know, and making us still fly all throughout the years.
Speaker 1: You know, we weren't we weren't poor people, so we
Speaker 1: had good fancy, very sexy. We loved it. We loved it.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we know. That's why. I just you know
Speaker 1: when I when they do time pieces, right, you know
Speaker 1: that they spent the money on this top piece. You
Speaker 1: know they have the folds looked like they were right,
Speaker 1: and you see no little pieces falling off. Myself, they're
Speaker 1: working there. They got the budget for the half up
Speaker 1: in this show. Here the clothes. I get mad time
Speaker 1: when I see time black people time period pieces and
Speaker 1: you can see the little hay on the edge kind
Speaker 1: of popping off the sides A side or right. They
Speaker 1: did the money right, they did the same discovery right.
Speaker 1: Talk about being involved with a production that said, you
Speaker 1: know something, We're gonna spend the money and you can
Speaker 1: leave to treat a Rebecca. Either one you can take
Speaker 1: lead on this question because it's it's and both of
Speaker 1: can respond after other response as well. It's really great
Speaker 1: to be treated special and allowed to tell your story
Speaker 1: with a budget that allows you to tell the story correct.
Speaker 1: You're absolutely right. I think it makes such a difference
Speaker 1: in how you feel like you can do your job
Speaker 1: because you know that other people are being given the
Speaker 1: access to do their job right, and so it just
Speaker 1: makes what you have to do that much easier. It
Speaker 1: made what we had to do so much easier because
Speaker 1: Jennifer Bryant had our backs with these beautiful costumes that
Speaker 1: fit us perfectly, and Miss Louisa was making these wigs
Speaker 1: that were so stunning but also really fit our natural
Speaker 1: hair textures of our face shapes, and you know, we
Speaker 1: had Marietta in the makeup department and her entire team
Speaker 1: just you know, making our faces look beautiful. But also
Speaker 1: like we made our faces look that way, not like
Speaker 1: a makeup team made our Facebook that way. I mean
Speaker 1: everything was taken care of so we could take care
Speaker 1: of these characters. Yeah, I would agree with that one.
Speaker 1: And also, you know every all these people who lead
Speaker 1: these departments were black women. Come on, all of the
Speaker 1: department heads were black women. They were black women, and
Speaker 1: they lead, they lead their teams with just the most esteemed.
Speaker 1: They were so distinguished, they were very clear. Um, they
Speaker 1: made us. I just keep using the word comfortable because
Speaker 1: I never I never worried about my hair, I never
Speaker 1: worried about my makeup. Um, I definitely never worried about clothes.
Speaker 1: Like we were comfortable all the time. And if they
Speaker 1: if there ever were a concerned a question, I would
Speaker 1: just be like, hey, um my pants are too tight.
Speaker 1: It would give me figgers fans like it was. It
Speaker 1: was never anything. It was just always because work in
Speaker 1: in that scene. Long, we're going out with the type
Speaker 1: and none of that all uncomfortable. I'll with you, let
Speaker 1: me change these pants. They showing it tight riding upon me.
Speaker 1: But that's but you know, the beauty of watching we
Speaker 1: were talking. I'm talking to Patrice Covington and Rebecca and
Speaker 1: Naomi Jones and goings to the anthology series UH called
Speaker 1: Genius and premiers a national geo U this uh Sunday March.
Speaker 1: Not only am I recommending, I'm just so fortunate to
Speaker 1: be able to talk to trut talented people because when
Speaker 1: I get to see something like that and I and I,
Speaker 1: and it takes me to a level of imagination because
Speaker 1: you guys gifted, You have gifts, and those gifts that
Speaker 1: you allowed me to share with like seeing you, like
Speaker 1: like like I knew when you were really singing that
Speaker 1: going wow, you know, that's that's a blessing. And so
Speaker 1: I have to believe that you guys understand your blessing
Speaker 1: and you feel very fortunate to be able to sharing
Speaker 1: them in the entertainment form like I know this your
Speaker 1: first television series and applause And but again, it's gonna
Speaker 1: be more, it's gonna be movies. And I know, you know,
Speaker 1: you have to doing your thing, you know, miss thing,
Speaker 1: you know, But but how how is life? What's the
Speaker 1: future for each one of you? Gonna go first, Pecca.
Speaker 1: The future is fabulous. Uh you know, the fab the fabulous,
Speaker 1: the fabulous. Come on. I can assure you that, Um yeah,
Speaker 1: they're they're a little little projects coming coming more uh
Speaker 1: here and there that I'm not sure if I'm allowed
Speaker 1: to speak about yet. But you know, I'm still waiting
Speaker 1: for that next big thing. But I'll let you know
Speaker 1: and and guess what. Feel free to come on my show.
Speaker 1: I'd like to believe that developed a relationship with you
Speaker 1: to that allows to I trust the opportunities. And I've
Speaker 1: been an entertainment business, you know, started writing no TV
Speaker 1: shows a ninety two. I know how this thing works.
Speaker 1: Sometimes all the auditions come on the same day and
Speaker 1: then they go months there's no audition, and you'll be going, God,
Speaker 1: what's going on? I've been broke for six months now.
Speaker 1: The day I ain't broke, I got five auditions and
Speaker 1: didn't get none of them. So what what? What? What
Speaker 1: are we going with this? And that's the really Patricia.
Speaker 1: You can expound just some just life and just tell
Speaker 1: people who try to make this business work for themselves,
Speaker 1: what enthusiastic what points of support can you give them? Advice?
Speaker 1: When you hit those low points because the highs are
Speaker 1: incredible and it's worth it. But when you hit those
Speaker 1: low points, you gotta dig out of and realize that's
Speaker 1: part of the process. Yeah, Well, in this business we
Speaker 1: have way more nose than yes. I mean, we audition.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you can audition four or five seven times a
Speaker 1: week and get nothing. When I booked this job, it
Speaker 1: was the only job I booked that year outside of
Speaker 1: you know, background singing and doing other things. You know.
Speaker 1: But I think what's important is creating and not waiting.
Speaker 1: That's one, speaking things as if they already are, and
Speaker 1: then just always being generous with light. So I have
Speaker 1: this um this saying this model that is trademarks are
Speaker 1: don't try to steal it, Russian McDonald. It's don't be
Speaker 1: a star being a galaxy. Now I saw that now,
Speaker 1: So what that means, It's means so many things. When
Speaker 1: I first created it, it was about you know, just
Speaker 1: being being sparkly and you know, being a star. But
Speaker 1: as as the years have gone on, it has gone
Speaker 1: on to me and just sharing, like, you know, if
Speaker 1: Rebecca and not see an audition that we think is
Speaker 1: right for the other, I'm gonna tell Rebecca I know
Speaker 1: that what's mine is mine. It will never pass me by.
Speaker 1: I'm always gonna shine light on her talent because I
Speaker 1: think she's an amazing talent. No star shines bright without
Speaker 1: the next star next to it shining. There's so much more,
Speaker 1: There's enough for everybody. So I just think, when what
Speaker 1: you give out is what you get in, what you are,
Speaker 1: what you will receive. So um, just keep being nice,
Speaker 1: believed that karma is a real thing and create. Don't wait,
Speaker 1: Okay has spoken your pockets and give me all your offer.
Speaker 1: If you cem, we'll be asking for Franklin. We'll be
Speaker 1: asking for according to be fans, and I be reefly
Speaker 1: remiss not to talk about the very talented young actress
Speaker 1: who played the role of the young Aretha Franklin who
Speaker 1: carries her because you know this, this is an anthology,
Speaker 1: so they do a lot of flashbacks. So just because
Speaker 1: you see a character in the first episode, you're gonna
Speaker 1: see him throughout the hoax episode because you're doing because
Speaker 1: it allows you to see what makes Areta at this
Speaker 1: point of her life, what happened in her life at
Speaker 1: that age that made her either hard, made a sophomore,
Speaker 1: the emotional maybe made her not trust anybody, because that
Speaker 1: was a big thing about trust in her life. You know,
Speaker 1: that came up with Ted, and it came up with
Speaker 1: her father cl so enclosing. Rebecca, you know, you know,
Speaker 1: you know, Deacon Deacon, Deacon treats and spoke now, uh
Speaker 1: ch just to day. You know she's passed to play.
Speaker 1: But ain't nobody putting no money in it yet? Okay, Rebecca,
Speaker 1: they're looking at the plate. They're gonna sit. We bring
Speaker 1: us on home. This is area the Genius series they're
Speaker 1: gonna premier on National g Oh Marching the first starring
Speaker 1: Patrice Coverton, Rebecca nail Me Jones. Bring me on home, girl.
Speaker 1: I'm at the altar. I just want to join the church.
Speaker 1: Come on, you know thing. You guys are amazing the
Speaker 1: heck with all these compliments. I watched all seven episodes
Speaker 1: on Sunday. Okay, I'm just telling you. I I started
Speaker 1: at one o'clock in the middle of March madness, and
Speaker 1: I didn't stop. I forgot watching basketball. And soon you
Speaker 1: watch one episode, you know, you know Netflix at you'all
Speaker 1: wired up, you know, into binge watching, and I go, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm going okay, okay, Episode two, Episode three, Okay, I
Speaker 1: look at the minute forty five and I got forty
Speaker 1: five minutes. I didn't not finished till nine thirty last night,
Speaker 1: and I was mad because they only sent me seven
Speaker 1: episode and it's the episode serious because I gotta wait
Speaker 1: till the end and it's gonna be worth it. I'm
Speaker 1: passing the passing the information line about high grade this seriously.
Speaker 1: More importantly, I got to introduce America and my fan
Speaker 1: base to YouTube fantastic actresses and singers, and the blessings
Speaker 1: are going to continue. And know I'm a fan. And
Speaker 1: when I say I'm a fan, your boy, I got
Speaker 1: six sisters, Okay, I got six tiers of our older
Speaker 1: name is Caroline, So you know there's some love in
Speaker 1: this conversation. And what y'all brought to the serious rita
Speaker 1: the genius series and anthology series, I bought a reata. Frankly,
Speaker 1: thank you for coming on money making Conversations. We will
Speaker 1: be right back with more money making conversations with your
Speaker 1: host Rashwan McDonald. What grows in the forest trees? Sure
Speaker 1: you know what else grows in the forest, our imagination,
Speaker 1: our sense of wonder and our family bonds grow too,
Speaker 1: because when we disconnect from this and connect with this,
Speaker 1: we reconnect with each other. The forest is closer than
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Speaker 1: of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families
Speaker 1: and the Council Him Rashan McDonald's the host of Money
Speaker 1: Making Conversation. The Cafe Mocha Swag Award is a celebration
Speaker 1: of black men who are making a difference in our
Speaker 1: community by empowering others to reach their life goals. From
Speaker 1: civic leaders, businessmen, activists, celebrities and everyday dads. The Cafe
Speaker 1: Moka Swagger Award winner this week is Prince Donnelle. He's
Speaker 1: one of the visionaries behind Jumping Jack Taxes. He wants
Speaker 1: to make entrepreneurship possible, creating generational wealth by serving the
Speaker 1: communities we come from and providing access to financial literacy.
Speaker 1: Prince Dannelle's goal is to take a piece of this
Speaker 1: billion dollar tax industry and push the profits back into
Speaker 1: our community. It's not about taxes, it's not about what
Speaker 1: industry that you go into, but it's about all of
Speaker 1: us pulling our dollars together to achieve a common goal.
Speaker 1: Now I'm going to be able to go to each
Speaker 1: and every one of them because the understanding group of
Speaker 1: economics and sharing and say, hey, there's this there's this
Speaker 1: block that has all these in the buildings. How about
Speaker 1: all of our partners. Let's all of us put our
Speaker 1: money together and let's all buy that block together and
Speaker 1: we all have a piece of that ownership. The Cafe
Speaker 1: Mocha Squag Award represents men who have strength, whose wisdom
Speaker 1: is asserted, and who is genuine in their spirit. Welcome
Speaker 1: back to Money Making Conversations with your host, Rashaan McDonald,
Speaker 1: my guest dog, Dr Willy Jolly and d Taylor Jolly.
Speaker 1: They are the authors of the Make Love, Make Money,
Speaker 1: Make It Last book tend Secrets to the Shape a
Speaker 1: Great Marriage. Please, welcome to Money Making Conversation the world.
Speaker 1: We're now Hall of Fame speaker and best selling author
Speaker 1: Dr Willy Jolly and the c O O. Willie Jolly Worldwide.
Speaker 1: De Taylor Jolly, how y'all doing very well? Pleased, the
Speaker 1: grateful and glad to have you as my friend for
Speaker 1: all these years, and we are honored to be able
Speaker 1: to be on with you and honored to be able
Speaker 1: to share some ideas with your audience hopefully will empower, inspire,
Speaker 1: and let's stair relationships in that marriage. Well, first of all,
Speaker 1: I got I gotta go to D first, you know,
Speaker 1: because I read the book. You know, because I knew
Speaker 1: D had swag. When she had a two eight e
Speaker 1: Z dot DOTR too e Z. I said, okay, okay, now, okay, now,
Speaker 1: because that was the car I have, Willie. Doctor to
Speaker 1: a d C. You had to have a little money
Speaker 1: in your bake. You had to have a little flat
Speaker 1: bo girl. Hey, Willie, you couldn't tell her nothing when
Speaker 1: she had adopted two e Z, could you? You're right,
Speaker 1: You're right, and you're drove it into the ground, you
Speaker 1: know that's true. When I got married to her, a
Speaker 1: lot of driving it and I just drove it into
Speaker 1: the absolutely yeah right when you looking ahead, class and
Speaker 1: style and to a e Z? What color was the
Speaker 1: d what color was it? It was? Person? It special,
Speaker 1: a special honor, a specialnor. You know, I took a
Speaker 1: lot of fun. That's why I wanted to start off
Speaker 1: with the with and talking about some of the things
Speaker 1: that I felt were engaging about your book or personal
Speaker 1: about the book. Because when you write a book like that,
Speaker 1: it has to be honest and and and and sometimes
Speaker 1: telling your story. It takes moments because you know, as
Speaker 1: you keep writing a book, you start, oh, let me,
Speaker 1: let me add this, so you start remembering a part
Speaker 1: of a story that you actually forgot that becomes an
Speaker 1: important part of the book. And and sitting down as
Speaker 1: a couple because I love what it says. What will
Speaker 1: it say? Is what D says. So each one of
Speaker 1: you as a couple saw things differently, but worked as
Speaker 1: a unit to succeed. Correct. Absolutely, you're right, and once
Speaker 1: she was one of the challenges. You know, I've read
Speaker 1: a number of books, many of them uh global bestsellers.
Speaker 1: It only takes a many change of life setback as
Speaker 1: a setup for comeback, turned setbacks into greenbacks and attitude
Speaker 1: of excellence chicken soup for the Christian soul. Writing one
Speaker 1: with my wife was really difficult because she typically has
Speaker 1: been my editor of all my books, and so when
Speaker 1: we went to write this one, it was challenging because
Speaker 1: I have my own voice, and I had never that
Speaker 1: I had my own voice and that I was not
Speaker 1: simply editing what he said. So we we struggle for
Speaker 1: a little while to we figured out our speed and
Speaker 1: how it's going to work, and then we would look
Speaker 1: at the ten principles that we had developed over these
Speaker 1: thirties six years or at that point it was about
Speaker 1: thirty thirty two years, thirty three years when we wrote
Speaker 1: the book. Also and uh, then once we got the
Speaker 1: principles lined up, who said, Okay, I will write my
Speaker 1: part or my take, Orange write her take. And that's
Speaker 1: when it really found magic. Not one other fact when
Speaker 1: we wrote the but we've been married for thirty six years,
Speaker 1: haven't had an argument, and over thirty three years now,
Speaker 1: those first couple of years with like World War three,
Speaker 1: I learned some principles that helped us stop arguing and
Speaker 1: get to loving each other. And I thought, she's staring
Speaker 1: at you, and she's staring at you, Willie. She's staring
Speaker 1: at you while you talking. Now, I don't know if
Speaker 1: all that's working in the direction you know the book is,
Speaker 1: Willie says, And D says. I think that was a
Speaker 1: D says, stands she was given she wanted to say
Speaker 1: about it. We got the principle, but we had to
Speaker 1: then embrace them. Go ahead, baby, I'm a former school
Speaker 1: teaching too. Absolutely so the nonverbal communication but embracing versus
Speaker 1: actually implementing the two different things right. So we had mentors,
Speaker 1: we had information, but we had to decide that we
Speaker 1: wanted to do this and that we wanted to work
Speaker 1: through it together. I would say that the most difficult
Speaker 1: part of the development of our relationship is actually how
Speaker 1: we communicate. Because Willie speaks for a living and he
Speaker 1: writes books in the life, so sometimes it can be
Speaker 1: overpowering until you pulled back and say, let's wait a minute. Now,
Speaker 1: here's what I have to say, and this is how
Speaker 1: I need you to communicate with me. And that came
Speaker 1: to a head over the Chinese food. Yeah, the biggest,
Speaker 1: the biggest challenge to our marriage came one night in
Speaker 1: a Chinese restaurant where we carry carry out when we
Speaker 1: almost broke up. And it's one of the biggest points
Speaker 1: in our marriage. And we talked about that three boulders
Speaker 1: that break up marriage, sex, money, and communication and communication
Speaker 1: is the three that we've through all of those, and
Speaker 1: we almost came to to end of our marriage over
Speaker 1: Chinese food. What basically happened was her family was coming
Speaker 1: to visit. I wanted to impress my brother right to
Speaker 1: d C. I'm a nice little southern girl from Hampton, Virginia,
Speaker 1: my father said, was a pastor and the like. And
Speaker 1: I wanted to simply impress my brother and his wife
Speaker 1: that we were doing okay, and we were doing well.
Speaker 1: And he said he. I said, what do y'all want
Speaker 1: for them? And he said, how about Chinese? Y'all got
Speaker 1: good Chinese restaurants And they don't have a lot of
Speaker 1: Chinese restaurants in the city where she's from and a
Speaker 1: southern city. I said, got you. I'm a Chinese food
Speaker 1: of ficiato, an expert, right all the spots. Now, she said,
Speaker 1: you like sushi. She be educating the sushi with you. Okay,
Speaker 1: so I know you got it. You read it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I also know that you were introverted as well, so
Speaker 1: you were going you. So we got to the restaurant.
Speaker 1: I told her, here's what we need. She said, no,
Speaker 1: we need more. I said, no, this is all we need.
Speaker 1: Know we need more? And I he was cheap. I'n't
Speaker 1: known for being strategy like a dollar hollow right right, right,
Speaker 1: right right, I said, here before we need and I
Speaker 1: got loud. I got loud. Unacceptable behavior for him to
Speaker 1: get loud with me, and so it got loud and
Speaker 1: more intense, and finally it got I was fever pitch,
Speaker 1: I was hollering, and she said, I will leave you married, folks.
Speaker 1: Here's a word I want you to learn. Dial it back,
Speaker 1: little phrase, dialing back. I said, dollar back, dollar value.
Speaker 1: He ordered everything that I thought we should have, went home,
Speaker 1: had dinner the end of the night, after everybody eating,
Speaker 1: we had leftovers. How much A lot, A lot. He
Speaker 1: doesn't like having Chinese leftovers because he says they're knocking
Speaker 1: the next step. But he was right. It was too much.
Speaker 1: And so when they left, we said, let's talk. You
Speaker 1: said he had to have a conversation, which was the
Speaker 1: very wise thing on his birthday. I said, we need
Speaker 1: to talk about this, and she said very clearly, I
Speaker 1: don't like anybody. I'm a daddy's girl. My daddy, Fire
Speaker 1: Bramstone Minister never raised his voice to me, always sweet,
Speaker 1: loving kind my brother, and I always said, you and
Speaker 1: you went this big time talker, this big time talker
Speaker 1: over here, he talks to thousands. That's that's Willie. He
Speaker 1: a big time talker, right you you know you pe k,
Speaker 1: big time talker. P K at the restaurant. He became
Speaker 1: a big time talker. MS introverts stepped up a game.
Speaker 1: There you go, and I said, and she said, I
Speaker 1: don't like people all at me. And I said, got it.
Speaker 1: And and now that I've got yours, let me tell
Speaker 1: you mine. I don't like people threatening to leave me,
Speaker 1: and don't don't threaten me. And so we made a
Speaker 1: we made an agreement. I said, I will never hauler
Speaker 1: at you again, and she said, I'll never threaten to
Speaker 1: leave you. And that's been over thirty three years. We
Speaker 1: haven't had an argument since. We don't always agree, but
Speaker 1: we've learned how to have systems that will help us
Speaker 1: to disagree without being disagreeable. And that's a chapter in
Speaker 1: the book that you disagree without being disagreeable there really
Speaker 1: there really isn't also isn't it also being disrespectful to
Speaker 1: in that part right there? You know? Which I which
Speaker 1: I like about the book is that you know it's
Speaker 1: all about communication when you said it earlier, Willie, because
Speaker 1: they're really communication and money, communication and big communication with
Speaker 1: your kids, communication when you work all that, if you
Speaker 1: don't communicate, and that was my biggest takeaway from this
Speaker 1: whole book was that you guys have mastered the art
Speaker 1: of communication. And that's what you're telling everybody. If you
Speaker 1: don't communicate, you can be two different people. And I
Speaker 1: love when you're talking about you know, he liked this
Speaker 1: type of food. I wasn't a sushi love. I had
Speaker 1: to be brought home to that side of the table.
Speaker 1: And then when you got to the whole part about
Speaker 1: his daughter shared that's the point where I had the
Speaker 1: most fun in the book because d I didn't know you,
Speaker 1: but it is so vivid, it is so colorful. You're
Speaker 1: driving at five hours to pick up his daughter, and
Speaker 1: you wouldn't one hundred be sent in the club of
Speaker 1: going backgether, like you said, the ex wife made her bad.
Speaker 1: As you said, sleep in it. You know, blending family
Speaker 1: raises can be very challenging, and and and marriages where
Speaker 1: you're blending up families. She had been back before I
Speaker 1: had a child, before I got married, and we had
Speaker 1: to blend all of this and it was very challenging.
Speaker 1: But again, it was the communication. It was the wise
Speaker 1: counsel of my mom, a mentor. When I called her
Speaker 1: and said what Willie was going to do? He was
Speaker 1: going to go pick up Sherry. I'm like, the house
Speaker 1: is calm, everybody gets along. Well, why are you doing this?
Speaker 1: And my mother said to me, I think what you said?
Speaker 1: She said, this is your mama said, you want to
Speaker 1: be married to a man that wants to be responsible
Speaker 1: to the children that he brought into this world. That's
Speaker 1: what your mama took. Why would you want a man
Speaker 1: like that? Why would you respect a man like that
Speaker 1: while you wouldn't love a man like that. That's what
Speaker 1: your mama said in this book. Did I read? Yes,
Speaker 1: you read that. That was her mama. And let me
Speaker 1: tell you something. It was the key because her mother
Speaker 1: made the difference, and so you know that communication. Look,
Speaker 1: the communication chapter is probably the biggest chapter, and we
Speaker 1: give that away free. Everybody. Want to give it to
Speaker 1: all your listeners on people who are viewing it can
Speaker 1: go to Jolly marriage dot com. Jolly marriage dot com
Speaker 1: get the free chapter from that book and we'll bless you.
Speaker 1: And if you choose to get the book, we recommend
Speaker 1: you get two copies going for each of you. We've
Speaker 1: had so many couples who were on their way to
Speaker 1: divorce court who was saying, we're gonna try one more time.
Speaker 1: They've got two copies and at the end of each
Speaker 1: chapter they would talk about what they learned. And we've
Speaker 1: had so many calls afterwards. In one particular call and said,
Speaker 1: we've been married fifteen years and we are not only
Speaker 1: not divorcing, but when we got to the end, we
Speaker 1: closed the book and we cried together because we realized
Speaker 1: we really didn't know much about each other. So we
Speaker 1: want to give that away Jolly marriage dot com. If
Speaker 1: ever we talk about sex, chapter chapter eight, Chapter eight,
Speaker 1: Chapter eight, now I know about that chapter. Now chapter
Speaker 1: the hot chapter, I think because it's titled sex, Headaches
Speaker 1: and Other Lives, he gets a lot of ten. But
Speaker 1: sex is not just intercourse, absolutely absolutely the intimacy which
Speaker 1: women need more so than the man, and it takes
Speaker 1: us along the road ending up with sex that intercourse.
Speaker 1: But women need the words, they need the roses, they
Speaker 1: need the tenderness, rose, they need the sweet talk. Look
Speaker 1: at you, look at you too much? You too much,
Speaker 1: but it makes me want to be close to him.
Speaker 1: You know the thing about it. Times we forget, but
Speaker 1: then all of the confusion and chaos, including the pandemic,
Speaker 1: we forget kind words, something tender, It actually draws the
Speaker 1: woman in and helps develop romance. Right, And I tell brothers, brothers,
Speaker 1: if you want some action to night, you need to
Speaker 1: start working on it. In the morning, thank you. Stop
Speaker 1: working the therd. And in the morning, I take her
Speaker 1: a smooth ye and the running a couple of office.
Speaker 1: But she's at her desk. I sent her a little
Speaker 1: text from my offer to her. She show across the
Speaker 1: hall from each other. Yeah, I said, you sure look
Speaker 1: good today. Make a big difference and and it will
Speaker 1: work better for you, gentlemen if you do it in
Speaker 1: that process, not just coming at the last minute at night. Gone,
Speaker 1: you're ready. You're that don't work. That don't work in
Speaker 1: this world. You gotta be more thoughtful and caring and
Speaker 1: tender to make a word of difference in your love life.
Speaker 1: You'll stopping. I'm trying to interview you, y'all. I got this.
Speaker 1: I read the book. I know, y'all love. I know
Speaker 1: this might communication with some people that need telling each other.
Speaker 1: That's care. Will it stop? It? Okay? Now, Now let's
Speaker 1: talk about communication, because I want to go back a
Speaker 1: little bit to the sharing situation, because that was important,
Speaker 1: because it was about communication, because it was one person
Speaker 1: accepting another young lady who was hostile because she didn't know.
Speaker 1: You know, the mom threw our hands up after she drunk,
Speaker 1: and I was I always remember it was a very
Speaker 1: similar situation with my my older sister. I we moved
Speaker 1: her daughter in and we set rules, and then six
Speaker 1: months later she made the phone call. They treat me
Speaker 1: like I'm in prison. They they won't let me go out,
Speaker 1: they won't and then of course, hey, the sister came
Speaker 1: got her. And I always regret that I didn't put
Speaker 1: up a bigger fight because I felt that she would
Speaker 1: have lived a different life if she would have been
Speaker 1: with us. And then but you had to change. That's
Speaker 1: the adjustment in communication. You know, we could joke around
Speaker 1: about the love, but this is the communication and accepting
Speaker 1: situations that you may not be comfortable with. And that's
Speaker 1: really what I took away when I read about the
Speaker 1: situation with Sherry. Do you are not comfortable? And also
Speaker 1: whether you are not comfortable because you had to mediate
Speaker 1: two people you love, but also had to have discipline,
Speaker 1: and then indeed you had to admit you had to
Speaker 1: accept some of the rulings that he put in place
Speaker 1: to make this thing work. So there was acceptance, there
Speaker 1: was a human communication, and also accepting the ability to
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable for the bigger goal. That was the most
Speaker 1: amazing part of the book for me because I took
Speaker 1: away so many different levels. That's that's great insight. And
Speaker 1: I think that you have to be willing to accept
Speaker 1: your own limitations and really who you are, Because if
Speaker 1: I had not been willing to say, I'm like, I'm
Speaker 1: doing this because I believe in and willing right, I'm
Speaker 1: married him, I don't agree. We talked about that because
Speaker 1: he's my best friend. The whole idea I gotta do
Speaker 1: all I can to save my daughter. I had to
Speaker 1: be on board, which meant I had to do the
Speaker 1: right thing whether I felt it or not. And that
Speaker 1: I think is so major. We get many of us
Speaker 1: blended families. We get caught up in the emotions and
Speaker 1: so we get carried away to the wrong things. We
Speaker 1: know the right things to do, we must do the
Speaker 1: right things, and then gradually the emotions come in and
Speaker 1: the situation changes hopefully. And we talked about better in
Speaker 1: this chapter called how to Handle a Stalemate, and it
Speaker 1: is a great object lesson on when you have two
Speaker 1: people who have opposite. And that's something that we decided
Speaker 1: on before we got married. Really had already talked about
Speaker 1: that in terms of this is not really it's fifty one.
Speaker 1: You know, that might not be a popular position today,
Speaker 1: but one you can't have a two headed You could
Speaker 1: have a two headed monster, but then you've got a monster.
Speaker 1: So how do we work through this? We worked through
Speaker 1: it by deciding early on. I said to her, look,
Speaker 1: you run everything, run the house, run the business. All
Speaker 1: I want you to do is to make me think
Speaker 1: I'm in charge. I feel like that was such a
Speaker 1: wise statement on the part of this young man, so
Speaker 1: I said, let me think I'm in charge. And I said,
Speaker 1: but what I will ask for is vito power. And
Speaker 1: when we are at at at a place where we
Speaker 1: both are a stalemaker, and all I ask you is
Speaker 1: give me vito and I promise you, I promise you
Speaker 1: I will never abusic. And in thirty six years of marriage,
Speaker 1: I've used it maybe two or three times. Always related
Speaker 1: to the children, Always related to the children, always related
Speaker 1: to the children, everything else we got. And I learned
Speaker 1: this from my my, my mom and dad. Uh with Sean.
Speaker 1: When my dad would be driving down the road my
Speaker 1: mom would be in the passenger seat. And you remember,
Speaker 1: back in old days they didn't have the head and
Speaker 1: left and you had that one rear view mirror. You
Speaker 1: didn't have one on that side. And and we're riding
Speaker 1: down the street and he said, can I get over?
Speaker 1: And my mom will wrote that window down and stick
Speaker 1: her head out to win. And she said either yes
Speaker 1: or no. And he would take his action dependent on
Speaker 1: what she told because they were teammates and they made
Speaker 1: decisions together. So I took that object lesson when we
Speaker 1: got married, said, look, you're my teammate. Nine times out
Speaker 1: of ten when you say we can get over, can
Speaker 1: I'm gonna listen to you because you're always in it
Speaker 1: for our best good. But that one time we have
Speaker 1: a difference. And I know moral if this was a
Speaker 1: moral decision, not emotional decision with my daughter who was
Speaker 1: acting up and her mama called and said you gotta
Speaker 1: come get her, and D said, no, I don't want
Speaker 1: to do it. This was a critical moral decision. I said,
Speaker 1: we gotta do it. It's the right thing. I know
Speaker 1: it's hard, but we gotta do it. And this is
Speaker 1: one of those times I gotta use veto power and
Speaker 1: she said okay, once we here's a big thing, with
Speaker 1: big thing. Once we said yes, she was all in.
Speaker 1: But that is with anything where once you make the
Speaker 1: decision okay, I want to go right, I want to
Speaker 1: go left, I want a you want be Once you
Speaker 1: come to an agreement, you both have to be all in.
Speaker 1: So even if it didn't turn out right, I had
Speaker 1: to make sure that I had done everything in my
Speaker 1: power that I could do to make it a success,
Speaker 1: so that he could never say, well, you know, d
Speaker 1: you didn't do No, this is a joint effort and
Speaker 1: we rise or fall together. And if it had gone
Speaker 1: south and it hadn't worked out and didn't work out,
Speaker 1: work out fine. But if it had gone south, I
Speaker 1: also knew she would never say to me, I told
Speaker 1: you so, but that that you know, I already wouldn't
Speaker 1: know that fact. He wants to be told I messed up,
Speaker 1: and you told me before, and now you're gonna remind
Speaker 1: me again. That takes the airport's story. Oh we have
Speaker 1: so many stories the flight right right, And that was
Speaker 1: my fault. I was. I knew it all, I had it.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm I'm a travelic hour And I said we'll
Speaker 1: get that fine enough time. We don't need to leave early.
Speaker 1: She keeps saying we need to leave. I got it,
Speaker 1: and we get caught in traffic. We missed the flight,
Speaker 1: and we're standing there and he's using all his persuasive
Speaker 1: powers to get on the flight. Doors are closed and
Speaker 1: getting ready to pull back from the gate. Right. I say,
Speaker 1: not a word as you say. And we eventually got
Speaker 1: a connecting flight to get us to the place where
Speaker 1: I had to speak the next morning. But at midnight
Speaker 1: we got in where we could have been in at
Speaker 1: six six pm. I love, but she's a reminder. Though
Speaker 1: she's a reminder, though you know what I'm saying. I'm
Speaker 1: not saying anything. I was already thinking I would beat
Speaker 1: myself out, but I love learned from that she had
Speaker 1: my back even when I messed up. I want want this.
Speaker 1: I want to say to two spouses that you can
Speaker 1: have each other's back even when you mess up, because
Speaker 1: they know they messed up. I want to ask you
Speaker 1: this question because you know, because it's the point, and
Speaker 1: because my wife will go to church. I'm not the
Speaker 1: church corps and one of the one of the you know,
Speaker 1: recommendations of the ten points is make God an equal
Speaker 1: part of your marriage. I'm not saying it was not
Speaker 1: an equal part. And I want I want help with this,
Speaker 1: and I wanted to help the UH, my viewers and
Speaker 1: my listeners when you talk about God, because you talk
Speaker 1: about certain points that you prayed and your decisions were
Speaker 1: brought through prayer, and I want help us through that
Speaker 1: whole process. When you say something like that, this is
Speaker 1: this is a principle. Now, look what we talked about
Speaker 1: in this book at ten principles. Now we wrote our
Speaker 1: ten principles. But then after I thought the book was finished,
Speaker 1: we went an interview people made from married forty fifty
Speaker 1: six seventy years and one of the things they all
Speaker 1: said was make God an equal part of your marriage.
Speaker 1: They said that the marriage is like a triangle. It
Speaker 1: has three corners. This is me, this is the and
Speaker 1: this is God up the top. Now this is thirty
Speaker 1: three percent. This is thirty three percent, but that's only
Speaker 1: what's left is thirty four per and that's God. And
Speaker 1: so he has the majority ownership of the marriage. And
Speaker 1: so he gives us these principles that work if we
Speaker 1: were use them. Now, so we practice the concepts that
Speaker 1: come from the from the Bible. Then the principles on marriage.
Speaker 1: Now here the principal principles work their bed rock. They
Speaker 1: work over and over again. I throw this rock up,
Speaker 1: throw this rock up every time. He's going to come
Speaker 1: down every time, not doing a hundred times, a million times,
Speaker 1: ten million times, because of a principle called gravity. These
Speaker 1: principles work, They work over time, over time, and over
Speaker 1: time because they are bedrock principles. Take romance. Romance is Slomon,
Speaker 1: that's right, the song of Solomon. So there are lots
Speaker 1: of principles, and the Bible says the bed should not
Speaker 1: be undefiled, that that you gotta a brother, gotta get
Speaker 1: hooked up. That's what it means. That's right. The difference
Speaker 1: between sex and their must intimacy. Okay, women need intimacy
Speaker 1: and security. Man needs sex and respect. And they are
Speaker 1: principles that are going to be all the time because
Speaker 1: even the scientific study show that men think about sex
Speaker 1: seventeen times a day on average, and sometimes before breakfast.
Speaker 1: So we know that that is the case. So what
Speaker 1: we say to married couples is understand that these principles
Speaker 1: are bedrock. They work in the words, so we trust
Speaker 1: God through our marriage and we run it through that prison.
Speaker 1: Everything through that about these raising kids how to be
Speaker 1: sweet to each other, And I say, how to me
Speaker 1: those words, how to be sweet to each other? But
Speaker 1: the tenderness, the the what second from the breast and
Speaker 1: all that romantic stuff like that. I love you. I
Speaker 1: want to thank y'all, man, Please thank you for First
Speaker 1: of all, let me just tell you this. I listened
Speaker 1: to you show all the time on Serious because my
Speaker 1: shows were serious, and so to just check it out
Speaker 1: that the beauty of who you are, man, is that
Speaker 1: we've known each other a long time, respected your relationship,
Speaker 1: your growth, the fact that I finally get to me
Speaker 1: d and read about her principles. Let me know why
Speaker 1: you're a great man, not an average man. You are
Speaker 1: a great man. And thank you for coming on money
Speaker 1: making conversations the CEO. Oh, thank you, you're a good man.
Speaker 1: I love your show and I love what you're doing,
Speaker 1: and your studio is awesome. Folk. Go to Jolly Marriage
Speaker 1: dot com, get a free chapter and get some of
Speaker 1: the resource. I'm gonna win with Willie dot com and
Speaker 1: you get all my websites right there went with Willie.
Speaker 1: God bless you love too. Much. Remember for sure, as
Speaker 1: I said at the end of my XM show your
Speaker 1: best yet your best It's yet to come, Willie. Thank
Speaker 1: youll Man. If you want to have more month interviews
Speaker 1: on Money to Make Conversation, please go to Money Making
Speaker 1: Conversation dot com al with Sean McDonald. I am your host.
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