Speaker 1: It's a Brook and Jeffrey podcast.
Speaker 2: Hey, and don't forget you can still text in your thoughts,
Speaker 2: your feelings, your opinions to seven eight five nine two.
Speaker 2: I mean we almost always respond oh that we read them, though, Yeah,
Speaker 2: we do read them. Okay, well we'll read them. I
Speaker 2: can guarantee that. Okay, seven eight five nine two. And
Speaker 2: the full show starts right now.
Speaker 3: It's been noted on the show many times that Brooke
Speaker 3: is a notorious miser miser I feel like.
Speaker 1: I really try to be a giving, lovely person.
Speaker 3: Jeffrey, Well, well, I don't find any joy in saying that,
Speaker 3: Brook does.
Speaker 1: I really don't you play this music?
Speaker 3: It's just facts. And anytime anything shipped to us for free,
Speaker 3: like when a new movie or TV show sends us
Speaker 3: a box of promotional shirts or coffee mugs, Brooke will
Speaker 3: go for it first and keep everything in the box
Speaker 3: for herself. Oh then give the rest to her entitled children,
Speaker 3: and we leave the scraps for us.
Speaker 2: Okay, listen, I did hoard my little pony one that
Speaker 2: we got, yet we.
Speaker 3: Received one the other day for some found of music
Speaker 3: remake or stage tour or something. I don't know what
Speaker 3: it was.
Speaker 1: But I think they were just replaying the movie.
Speaker 3: Brook of course grabbed it immediately, and she had to
Speaker 3: take her kids to their polo lessons, so she said,
Speaker 3: you guys, open it, but she said make sure to
Speaker 3: leave the most expensive item for me on my chair.
Speaker 3: I did that. I followed her instructions and left Brook
Speaker 3: the biggest, nicest thing, which was a hand embroidered blanket.
Speaker 1: These are a few of my favorite things.
Speaker 3: Next morning, I come in and what do I see?
Speaker 4: What happened?
Speaker 3: Said blanket out on the free table in our breakthrough.
Speaker 5: I don't want any of this stock.
Speaker 3: Just one little problem with that.
Speaker 1: I thought someone would like it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that thought it was nice, but someone in the
Speaker 3: company did a little blanket investigation.
Speaker 6: I get it.
Speaker 3: And if you know anything about the sound of music,
Speaker 3: it has World War two Nazi influence. At this point,
Speaker 3: the Nazis it is. I hate to say this about
Speaker 3: a coworker, I really do.
Speaker 1: But now, given you the box.
Speaker 3: There are rumors going around the office. Don't say that
Speaker 3: she dropped off a Himmler blanket in the.
Speaker 7: Blue throat.
Speaker 3: Trying to spread her Nazi dropaganda the office. Look, that's
Speaker 3: just the office tea right now. I tried to stomp
Speaker 3: it out and say, let's give the benefit of the jat,
Speaker 3: let's hear her out, but a lot of people argued, no,
Speaker 3: she knew what she was doing. She's pushing the propaganda.
Speaker 8: On to the.
Speaker 9: Brook.
Speaker 3: I don't know what you want to say right now.
Speaker 3: Have you always been associated with the Nazis?
Speaker 1: Es new things for you?
Speaker 5: Holy anti Nazi?
Speaker 2: Julie is a damn icon, Okay, And that blanket was
Speaker 2: not very cozy.
Speaker 5: I gave it up on there.
Speaker 3: I mean, I really didn't think it could get worse
Speaker 3: after you went on Twitter publicly supporting Kanye last night.
Speaker 3: So I guess let's just hope this goes away quietly.
Speaker 3: Let's move on. We're in the terrible ones. Wow. Anyway,
Speaker 3: we're going on to the shack collar question of the day.
Speaker 10: Brook just starting to give Jeff.
Speaker 3: Jacob try and bring the mood up a little bit
Speaker 3: with the question that you would ask us. I'll do
Speaker 3: my best.
Speaker 10: Well, whenever you go out to a movie, you want
Speaker 10: to grab the.
Speaker 11: Best possible seat in the house, obvious, and there's a
Speaker 11: few ways to make sure that happens. You could do
Speaker 11: what Brooke does and rent out the entire theater for
Speaker 11: just her family, or you can bounce around seats like
Speaker 11: goldilocks until you find.
Speaker 10: One that's just right.
Speaker 4: That's kind of annoying, though, but.
Speaker 11: That's why A new survey asked a thousand moviegoers to
Speaker 11: name something that causes people to change seats at the movies.
Speaker 3: That's a good question.
Speaker 11: You'll need to get the top five answers in a
Speaker 11: brand new edition of Unglued Family Feud. We'll start with
Speaker 11: the guy who once used the popcorn bucket trick on himself.
Speaker 3: What happened?
Speaker 11: He was still surprised, Jeffrey, name something that causes people
Speaker 11: to change seats.
Speaker 3: At the movies. Okay, I think there's a lot of
Speaker 3: people that get annoyed by this, but I personally enjoy
Speaker 3: it when a couple in the theater is getting a
Speaker 3: little bit firsty with each other, maybe in the back row.
Speaker 1: So you actually find those people and sit right behind them.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and I whisper nice things to them while
Speaker 3: it's happening.
Speaker 1: Yeah, get it, moting in between them.
Speaker 3: So I'm gonna use that as my guess. What is
Speaker 3: couples hooking up near you make you want to move?
Speaker 6: Actually a good answer? A weird way to get there.
Speaker 1: And disturbing and involved his mother.
Speaker 10: An affectionate couple is number five of them.
Speaker 1: Is that the first time ever he's got right?
Speaker 11: Yeah, let's go to to Lexis name is something that
Speaker 11: causes people to change seats at the movies.
Speaker 12: I've never changed seats in the movies, but I don't
Speaker 12: go a lot because I like to talk so much
Speaker 12: during movies.
Speaker 6: Everyone's changed. She's like, I'm always all alone.
Speaker 4: To say.
Speaker 12: And I did a movie review se man I love.
Speaker 1: We both talked so much.
Speaker 12: So maybe people move away from me. I'm gonna go
Speaker 12: with talking.
Speaker 10: Jake having noisy neighbors. That's number two on Alexis nail.
Speaker 3: Let's go over to Jose now hear it?
Speaker 4: That was on my list.
Speaker 13: Well, I have another thing on my list I think
Speaker 13: is more disturbing, and that's when people are on their phones.
Speaker 13: It's the light that you can see the light and
Speaker 13: sometimes they don't from their brightness down and you just
Speaker 13: see it flashing in the corner your eyes.
Speaker 4: So I'm going to say people.
Speaker 10: On their phones, Jake, annoying phone users, not on the God.
Speaker 2: For a second, I didn't think I was going to
Speaker 2: get to answer. Okay, I've been thinking about this and
Speaker 2: two things popped up in my mind. First one, I
Speaker 2: hate when I sit down and I'm in a sticky area. Oh,
Speaker 2: you know, like your feet are stuck to the ground.
Speaker 3: My mom's seats.
Speaker 1: You mean she dropped her coke.
Speaker 3: Right, that's what mean? Yeah, of course.
Speaker 2: But then I was also thinking of personal experience, and
Speaker 2: the only time I ever switched seats being a short
Speaker 2: person is when somebody tall.
Speaker 1: Is sitting in front of me and I can't see
Speaker 1: the screen, especially big heads. I'm sorry, Jake, I don't
Speaker 1: mean to direct that.
Speaker 10: This is an immediate head is.
Speaker 5: Like big old a bobblehead.
Speaker 10: I was seven and seven eighth size.
Speaker 3: Heads, Yeah, cover it up with a Himmler blanket.
Speaker 1: So I need to go with someone tall blocking your view.
Speaker 10: Forget the big head.
Speaker 4: One of the pet boys.
Speaker 10: A tall person sitting in front of you is number three.
Speaker 6: Before you answer?
Speaker 13: Is broken on it because I've changed seats because I'm
Speaker 13: really broken one.
Speaker 3: Let's go over the answer.
Speaker 10: Let's do it. Number one just overall. You want a
Speaker 10: better view?
Speaker 4: Oh god, yeah?
Speaker 11: Number two noisy neighbors, that's what alexis gott Number three
Speaker 11: brooks at a tall person in front of you. Number four,
Speaker 11: it was said in the room dirty or sticky seats.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I can see it.
Speaker 11: And then number five Jeffrey's answer, I will never forget
Speaker 11: unaffectionate couple affectionate things.
Speaker 4: Wow, I'm getting shocks.
Speaker 3: Is gonna be taking it a while? Yeah, So somebody
Speaker 3: wanted to hear you singing Unholy by Sam Smith.
Speaker 14: I like this song.
Speaker 13: Mummy don't know he's getting hot at the body shop
Speaker 13: doing something Unholy.
Speaker 3: Got kind of into your shot collar question of the day,
Speaker 3: Freaking Jeffrey in the morning, guys, I had that classic
Speaker 3: nightmare where you're at school or you're at work and
Speaker 3: you suddenly realize you're not wearing pants.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, we've all been there.
Speaker 1: Is it a nightmare for you?
Speaker 11: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I mean it's just a regular Tuesday for you. But
Speaker 3: then I told this lame joke in it and nobody laughed.
Speaker 3: You know, the one about the newspaper what's white and
Speaker 3: black and red all over?
Speaker 12: No, people still use that joke.
Speaker 3: Oh a newspaper, Oh my god, nobody's laughing. Oh no, wait,
Speaker 3: it's happening right now.
Speaker 4: Oh no, I would have laughed if I got it.
Speaker 3: And in my dream. I had a white sweater on too,
Speaker 3: and I'm wearing one today, and then to my female
Speaker 3: co host just started randomly kissing in it for no reason.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, it's about to happen. Somebody videos.
Speaker 13: Hurry everyone looks, don't it's almost my eye contracted up.
Speaker 1: There, dude.
Speaker 5: I actually liked the newspaper joke better than that.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, Broke, Yes, you can use your selfie
Speaker 3: stick if that's what you want to do. So that
Speaker 3: was what was on my mind all night.
Speaker 5: Stop dreaming about us.
Speaker 3: I bet even more disturbing thoughts and co hosts kissing
Speaker 3: are gonna come out when we do a brand new
Speaker 3: edition of What's on Your Mind?
Speaker 4: If you want to kiss?
Speaker 3: Okay, it was just the female. Okay, that's what we're
Speaker 3: gonna do.
Speaker 14: Coming up frooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: You know how the famous saying goes New Year, who diss?
Speaker 3: And we promised to bring that same clueless attitude into
Speaker 3: our first What's on Your Mind of twenty twenty four.
Speaker 3: We're gonna start things off with Brooke like we always do. Hey, Brook,
Speaker 3: what's on your Mind?
Speaker 5: Got okay?
Speaker 6: First?
Speaker 5: It is so good to be back in our brand
Speaker 5: new studio.
Speaker 1: I just it is so beautiful. If you haven't seen it.
Speaker 3: Go to our socials or come in to the studio.
Speaker 10: Yes.
Speaker 1: Sure, but over the break we got a chance to
Speaker 1: travel to Portugal.
Speaker 10: And your family got us.
Speaker 14: Yeah.
Speaker 2: And I gotta say, the strangest experience of my life
Speaker 2: was seeing Portuguese Santa Claus.
Speaker 1: It was like being on an acid trip.
Speaker 5: Well and I've never been on an acid trip, but
Speaker 5: this is what I imagine it to be.
Speaker 3: How is Portuguese Santa different than first?
Speaker 1: We go wait in line and behind the door where
Speaker 1: Santa is we can't see, but we keep hearing all.
Speaker 2: This applause, like flaws, like large groups of people applauded.
Speaker 14: I guess.
Speaker 1: So we're like, you know, talking like what is this
Speaker 1: going to be?
Speaker 2: So finally a large Portuguese sparkly elf opens the door, right,
Speaker 2: and let's twenty of us in.
Speaker 1: To a pitch black room filled with black lights.
Speaker 12: Wait where like there's like oh my god, yes yes.
Speaker 1: And there's like spray painted knee on Sanna on the wall.
Speaker 3: Does Santa have his shirt?
Speaker 5: And he's not even in there. All that's in there
Speaker 5: is the two elves.
Speaker 2: So we proceed for the next twenty five minutes to
Speaker 2: play some sort of Simon says where we're pointing.
Speaker 1: To our hair and our bellies.
Speaker 5: We don't really know. We're just kind of trying to
Speaker 5: follow the same movements.
Speaker 1: And then when you get it wrong, they sing a.
Speaker 5: Song and they clap it around in a circle. I
Speaker 5: celebrate how stupid you are. After twenty five.
Speaker 2: Minutes of this, finally the door opens, so we go
Speaker 2: into the room and there is the skinniest sannah.
Speaker 1: You've ever seen.
Speaker 2: Well, I just think Europeans, so maybe on a better Mediterranean,
Speaker 2: you know, And we just do a couple of thumbs
Speaker 2: up photos. It's like thumb and then we're ushered out
Speaker 2: and both kids look at me and they're just like
Speaker 2: shock in their face.
Speaker 1: They're like, we didn't like that. It is not like
Speaker 1: the typical So just you know, different culture, different vibes.
Speaker 6: That's cool though. Yeah, well you guys didn't know.
Speaker 13: I went to Disneyland overbreak and it was amazing. Everything
Speaker 13: was awesome except for one thing. I was in Tunetown.
Speaker 6: Oh Town's amazing.
Speaker 4: So I'm buying Mickey Ears at a shop.
Speaker 13: Right after my purchase, I'm fidgeting with them trying to
Speaker 13: put them on, and I look and I see an
Speaker 13: exit sign.
Speaker 4: Well, all of a sudden, I look up and I'm
Speaker 4: in a long hallway. No no, I'm like, oh, I'm
Speaker 4: not supposed to be here.
Speaker 13: And then I turned back around just to open the
Speaker 13: door behind me that I just went in, and there's
Speaker 13: a sign that says check your costumes, and I'm like, oh, no,
Speaker 13: I'm in an employee hallway. And then I realized that
Speaker 13: there's a code on the panel on the inside, so
Speaker 13: I can't just open the door again walk for me
Speaker 13: and stuck. So then I start wandering down this hallway
Speaker 13: and it is long, and their sons like remember the Magic,
Speaker 13: And I'm just freaking out because there's just door after
Speaker 13: door and it's like real life Alice in Wonderland.
Speaker 14: What color is it?
Speaker 12: Making a video?
Speaker 10: I didn't want to.
Speaker 12: I'm scared.
Speaker 4: I thought of it, but I will call the police
Speaker 4: because I was like, what do I do, Like, I'm.
Speaker 6: Trapped at Disneyland in a long, gray hallway.
Speaker 13: I can't even if I thought about testing doors, but
Speaker 13: even if one opens, I don't know what ride I'm behind.
Speaker 4: I'm not gonna walk in.
Speaker 13: And all of a sudden, I'm like a character on
Speaker 13: a ride, like so I start to freak out. I'm like,
Speaker 13: when do I call the police? And then eventually this
Speaker 13: teenager walks in an employee works there.
Speaker 3: Okay, and I'm like, oh my god, help me.
Speaker 6: I'm lost and I'm scared and I'm trapped.
Speaker 4: I don't know where I am.
Speaker 10: You're a grown man.
Speaker 5: I really was scared, raise out the child and all
Speaker 5: of it.
Speaker 13: So she does what she should do, and like I'm
Speaker 13: a child. She's like, okay, let's calm down, take a breath.
Speaker 10: Where were now?
Speaker 3: Where's your mommy?
Speaker 4: And jass?
Speaker 6: She literally said, where's your family?
Speaker 4: And I'm like, She's like, it's okay.
Speaker 10: Where were you?
Speaker 6: And I was like I was buying the years and
Speaker 6: two down and I just wanted to go back that.
Speaker 6: She's like okay, and then she grabs my.
Speaker 4: Hand and she's like, let's get you to Tunetown.
Speaker 13: She held, she puts in the code, gets me back in,
Speaker 13: and everything was fine.
Speaker 3: Gudge made it out. Okay, alexis what's been on your mind?
Speaker 15: I'm going to add onto the vacation stories. And I
Speaker 15: went to Italy, but it wasn't exactly what I expected, Okay,
Speaker 15: what do you expect? Well, I knew their coffee was good,
Speaker 15: I heard, but like the issue is they just have
Speaker 15: like one shot of espresso, you know, at the counter,
Speaker 15: and like that's not going to do it for me.
Speaker 12: I wanted ice and I need four shots.
Speaker 1: They're not going to ice coffee and they don't do that.
Speaker 12: So I ended up going to Starbucks a lot.
Speaker 1: They don't even have ice.
Speaker 3: Go to Starbucks in Italy exactly.
Speaker 15: Then I had to hide my cup walking around because
Speaker 15: it was like pretty embarrassing nobody had it. And then
Speaker 15: I love the croissants, but I got tired of them,
Speaker 15: so I did find myself really craving a sausage biscuit
Speaker 15: and I had to find a McDonald's.
Speaker 1: In Italy. You just went to Italy to experience the
Speaker 1: United States.
Speaker 12: Yeah, it is a.
Speaker 4: Europe to them, you know.
Speaker 15: And then it's like people talk up the big like things.
Speaker 15: They're like the Colisseum I went to Okay, yeah, okay,
Speaker 15: and I took photos, but.
Speaker 12: Not of the broken rocks in front of me. I
Speaker 12: took them.
Speaker 15: There was a cat loose in the coliseum area, and yeah,
Speaker 15: it was way more exciting than all the history around me.
Speaker 12: I just followed this cat around the Colisseum and without
Speaker 12: that is it great? Not really, I mean, but that
Speaker 12: made it worth it.
Speaker 15: I just want to give some honesty to people before
Speaker 15: they go to Italy, so you know what to expect, Jeffrey, what's.
Speaker 10: On your mind?
Speaker 3: I went to the Netherlands for our holiday break, and
Speaker 3: it's a little intimidating being around the people of the
Speaker 3: Netherlands because they're all very tall, very fit, very naturally
Speaker 3: good looking. Heah, the whole city, bikes.
Speaker 1: Everywhere, and they all speak like five languages.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, well educated. But the most dating part of
Speaker 3: it was when I went to a bathroom at one
Speaker 3: of the local pubs. No one was in the stalls there.
Speaker 3: That's not where I'm going with it. I'm not intimidated
Speaker 3: by that. The journals in the Netherlands are like a
Speaker 3: foot taller than they are than in America.
Speaker 14: Oh is it like?
Speaker 1: Can you reach?
Speaker 3: You see? In order in order to get my business done,
Speaker 3: I had to take a step back and coast Guarden
Speaker 3: that mean, But you know the coast guard has those
Speaker 3: like boats the spray water up onto the ships. They're
Speaker 3: not like flat across. It's like an upwards arc like
Speaker 3: a Steph Curry three pointer from Downtown Splash Brothers. So
Speaker 3: it was a challenge, got the job done, and I
Speaker 3: am a better person for having visited the Netherlands.
Speaker 16: This is like a course something I feel for whoever
Speaker 16: had to clean that bathroomage.
Speaker 1: Oh my god?
Speaker 3: Seven tell us what's been on your mind? It's Brook
Speaker 3: and Jeffrey. In the morning. We got a text into
Speaker 3: seven eight five nine two with somebody saying, what's on
Speaker 3: my mind? You don't talk enough about Hell's Kitchen?
Speaker 1: Just wait the show or the neighborhood in New York City.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think they mean the show, but let's fix that.
Speaker 1: Go ahead, Hell's Kitchen. What a show I've never seen?
Speaker 1: It is that the one looking right.
Speaker 3: Cookie?
Speaker 5: People are stupid.
Speaker 3: There you go. I hope you're satisfied.
Speaker 1: I've ever tasted.
Speaker 6: Yeah, shut up, donkey, he says, donkey, are you donkey?
Speaker 3: Wow? I hope that was worth it for whoever. Another
Speaker 3: text says, my name is Kate, And every morning we
Speaker 3: start off by listening to your show. We list off
Speaker 3: the top five songs we think y'all will play, and
Speaker 3: funny enough, those five come on.
Speaker 12: That's weird because I think we only play four on
Speaker 12: this station.
Speaker 3: That we're not licensed for that. And one more says,
Speaker 3: what's on my mind is that Alexis should try mac
Speaker 3: and cheese mixed with hop ramen and ranch dressing. They
Speaker 3: say it's really good.
Speaker 12: What do you cook the ram or is it like uncooked?
Speaker 12: Because that's not like a lot of work.
Speaker 1: If it's a both, she doesn't even barely.
Speaker 3: Cook the mat still might be a little bit too
Speaker 3: spicy for with that ranch on texts coming in seventy
Speaker 3: eighty five nine to tell us what's been on her mind.
Speaker 14: Freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: You ever feel like sometimes people just don't know when
Speaker 3: to quit.
Speaker 1: What I mean, Oh, that's definitely me.
Speaker 3: With this job. Yeah, or like you know with Alexis
Speaker 3: with driving. Oh, it doesn't matter how many park cars
Speaker 3: she dings, or stop signs she runs over, or drawbridges
Speaker 3: that she tries to jump at the last second.
Speaker 1: It's amazing what that Jennifer do.
Speaker 3: Next time I'm a little faster, she just puts the
Speaker 3: smile right behind that wheel. Again.
Speaker 1: I'm a good Dad's still paid for insurance.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just like the listeners that we're about to
Speaker 3: hear from today who've gone on bad date after my
Speaker 3: numbingly bad dates? But do they give up on finding love? No,
Speaker 3: they do not keep that and it's admirable. We really
Speaker 3: admire that they're willing to come on our show and
Speaker 3: share their hilarious, horrible day stories. In a brand new
Speaker 3: edition of Battle of the Tender Dates, it's coming.
Speaker 14: Up two hopeless one dating app then dares you guys
Speaker 14: swipe right? The question is whose love life is more tragic?
Speaker 3: It's Battle Love the Tender Dates. Little bo Pete may
Speaker 3: have lost her sheep, but this segment helped her lose
Speaker 3: her self respect. The Battle of the Tender Dates where
Speaker 3: two of our listeners go head to head to find
Speaker 3: out whose dating life is the most tragic. We'll explain
Speaker 3: the rules in just a second, but first let's meet
Speaker 3: today's contestants. In this corner, her bedroom playlist consists of
Speaker 3: eight straight hours of non stop elevator music, and yes,
Speaker 3: she needs all eight hours. Meet Generica Erica.
Speaker 1: Eight doesn't.
Speaker 3: And in the other corner, instead of drinking till she
Speaker 3: gets beer goggles, she prefers to cut right to the
Speaker 3: chase and rubs ointment directly in her eyes. Meet neospor
Speaker 3: and Laurie. Okay, everybody's sexy when your vision's blurrious, don't eyes.
Speaker 3: Here's how the game works. One contestant will start by
Speaker 3: telling one of their worst dating stories. Then the other
Speaker 3: will try and counter with the nightmare story of their own.
Speaker 3: We're going back and forth for three rounds, so we
Speaker 3: declare a winner. Starting things off with Generica Erica go,
Speaker 3: I will go.
Speaker 17: Over this gosle Okay. When suddenly all of the lights
Speaker 17: went out.
Speaker 1: Oh no, romantic, I don't know, like the powers out.
Speaker 17: No, his electricity wash at all because he didn't pay
Speaker 17: the bill.
Speaker 1: I bet he had a lot of candles. I mean,
Speaker 1: we've all been in that place where it happens every
Speaker 1: too often.
Speaker 14: Yeah, but wait here it is.
Speaker 17: He said if I could ship in, he would pay
Speaker 17: me back, oh.
Speaker 3: His electricity. And you did.
Speaker 17: No, I did not.
Speaker 3: You're the fail on that day, and we're over to you.
Speaker 18: So I was out with drinks with the guy and
Speaker 18: I thought we were having a great time and it
Speaker 18: was late. It was about what I am and he
Speaker 18: said he needed a minute. So I see him walk
Speaker 18: across the room of the bar, and I can kind
Speaker 18: of see him because it's a little crowded, and I
Speaker 18: see him pull out his phone and he starts crying.
Speaker 1: He's crying, did he get a terrible text or something?
Speaker 18: That's where I thought he like seemed to like get
Speaker 18: it for like a few minutes, gathered himself back up together,
Speaker 18: and they came over to me, and I was like, hey,
Speaker 18: what's up? Is everything all right? Because I thought somebody
Speaker 18: had died?
Speaker 8: Right?
Speaker 18: Oh no, he just drunk, calls his ex every night
Speaker 18: at one am to think he misses her.
Speaker 1: Oh dude, oh that girl leads to block his number.
Speaker 6: He's a romance do you like a normal people do,
Speaker 6: and just stalk her Facebook.
Speaker 3: Point around to Erica.
Speaker 17: So a guy brought me to a restaurant and as
Speaker 17: we're walking in, he said he used to be a regular,
Speaker 17: but okay, he didn't know if they remembered him or not.
Speaker 1: All right, that's what sounds all kind of cool, right right.
Speaker 17: But then we get there and there's a picture of
Speaker 17: his face hanging on the door saying no entry.
Speaker 1: Oh oh oh nomber is it like electricity guy? Then
Speaker 1: he went to bounce check man or what happened?
Speaker 17: It turns out he used to dine and dance there
Speaker 17: over five times.
Speaker 9: I'm very proud of it, and you didn't.
Speaker 3: Even get to try it with him. Yeah sucks, Lauren?
Speaker 3: Can you counter?
Speaker 18: My date came over to my house and we were
Speaker 18: making out of my couch and he said he needed
Speaker 18: to go to the bathroom, but instead of going to
Speaker 18: the bathroom, and he peed in my cat's litter box.
Speaker 14: What.
Speaker 7: I was so sucked?
Speaker 18: But I was like, what the hell? And he had
Speaker 18: his roommates and him do it all the time at
Speaker 18: their place to save money on water.
Speaker 1: He better scooped his own clumps.
Speaker 3: On to the third in the final round, These need
Speaker 3: to be your best stories, Erica.
Speaker 14: What he got?
Speaker 17: So I bonded with this guy from tiendre over True
Speaker 17: Crime podcast. We absolutely loved him.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and alexis too.
Speaker 3: I mean, I think it's normal for girls to like them.
Speaker 3: Do you guys normally like that stuff?
Speaker 17: But then we start talking about what he does for
Speaker 17: a living. Turns out he works in a morgue and
Speaker 17: if I wanted a four WHOA?
Speaker 1: Does this dream come true? Or does it creep you out?
Speaker 17: I mean I say yes, you know, we started walking
Speaker 17: around and he points to the casket in the back
Speaker 17: and asked me, do I want to stay the night?
Speaker 1: WHOA you want to get anger?
Speaker 5: We buy yourself or with Maybe it was one of
Speaker 5: those caskets for two.
Speaker 4: No, it's like a double decker one.
Speaker 3: Lauren, this was the last chance.
Speaker 18: Went out with a guy who called himself a semi
Speaker 18: professional rapper.
Speaker 1: Oh, semi professional.
Speaker 18: Yeah, he said, whatever I'd order, he'd rap about it.
Speaker 18: Oh fine, okay, Yeah, So I said okay, and I
Speaker 18: ordered to Pine Appears and he's like he tried for
Speaker 18: like five minutes, so couldn't sure any word that rhymed
Speaker 18: with pint.
Speaker 9: It was really embarrassing.
Speaker 1: Tight.
Speaker 3: Tight, it's almost a bad word.
Speaker 9: Yeah, he gave up and.
Speaker 18: He was so ashamed for himself. He just went home
Speaker 18: and like you had to rethink his whole career.
Speaker 1: Oh wow, he could have just gone with beer instead.
Speaker 1: So many things.
Speaker 3: That's the plot to eight mile, right, Yeah, that's all right.
Speaker 3: The final bell means the match is over, Judges, we
Speaker 3: need to score at Alexis who wins today?
Speaker 12: I'm going Lauren for the kitty letterbox guy.
Speaker 3: Wow, we got one for neospor and Lauren Brooks Erica.
Speaker 1: With all those poor men, I'm going to sleep in
Speaker 1: a casket Erica.
Speaker 3: Okay, the decision comes down to Jose, I'm gonna go
Speaker 3: with sleeping in a casket Erica. Yeah, congratulations Generica, Erica,
Speaker 3: you have such a disastrous dating life. Even a room
Speaker 3: full of radio degenerates take pity on you.
Speaker 1: It's true.
Speaker 7: Oh my I never w.
Speaker 14: Yeah so much.
Speaker 1: But it's something.
Speaker 3: Put it on your Tinder bio. Now that's Battle of
Speaker 3: the Tinder dates. Phone taps coming up right.
Speaker 14: After that, brooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: Today, we call a guy who recently signed up online
Speaker 3: to get a life coach. He told his girlfriend he
Speaker 3: thought he needed some more focus and guidance in order
Speaker 3: to reach his goals. So we got to make this
Speaker 3: call quick before he gets in touch with the real
Speaker 3: life coach. In the meantime, though, Brook's gonna fill in. Yeah,
Speaker 3: she may not be licensed or quote unquote saye who
Speaker 3: needs that, but she does have something the other mentors don't.
Speaker 3: A background track of uplifting inspirational music. Yeah, that's the secret.
Speaker 3: Hear it in your phone tap right now?
Speaker 16: Another Hello, Hi, Nicholas. Yeah, I'm your new life coach.
Speaker 16: My name is Carrie Oky.
Speaker 1: That's O.
Speaker 19: A k.
Speaker 9: E y ok okay.
Speaker 3: Hi.
Speaker 1: We don't have a lot of.
Speaker 16: Time together today, but the time we have is going
Speaker 16: to be constructive. So through our Life Coach website, I
Speaker 16: have read your profile and listen. I came up with
Speaker 16: three important steps that are going to change your life.
Speaker 16: I need you to write them down right now.
Speaker 9: Hey, I'm wasn't even sure I wanted to go through
Speaker 9: with it. I just filled that thing out.
Speaker 16: Sometimes the universe brings you to the right place. Other
Speaker 16: times it drops you off at a dumpster behind an Arby's.
Speaker 1: I'm not your dumpster. Let's get to step one. I
Speaker 1: need you to buy a website.
Speaker 9: What that's life advice? What are you talking about?
Speaker 16: Because step two is going to make sense. I need
Speaker 16: you to max out your credit card, preferably a platinum
Speaker 16: visa card. Wait, I'll give you my referral code later.
Speaker 9: What do you mean max out my credit card?
Speaker 16: And step three you just buy as much candy as
Speaker 16: you can and start selling it to the world.
Speaker 5: No, yes, you are going to sell candy to children
Speaker 5: all across the internet.
Speaker 9: I don't understand what's going on.
Speaker 1: I need to ask you, who can take tomorrow?
Speaker 3: Can dip it in a dream?
Speaker 20: Oh, dreams plural, separate the sorrow and collectible the cream.
Speaker 1: The candy man can, I can't hear you. The candy
Speaker 1: man can.
Speaker 9: Oh, Nicholing you off your phone right now.
Speaker 1: This is going to change your life, Nicholas. We are
Speaker 1: putting you on a new path.
Speaker 9: Up a path. I don't know what's really going on.
Speaker 8: Is this really your advice?
Speaker 9: You want me to buy and sell candy.
Speaker 1: I feel like you're hearing me, Nicholas, but you're not
Speaker 1: feeling me.
Speaker 9: No, I'm hearing you. You're telling me to buy a
Speaker 9: website sell candy to children online. I don't know how
Speaker 9: that is supposed to help me. I'm looking for life advice,
Speaker 9: not candy entrepreneurial advice.
Speaker 1: Okay, Nicholas, I want you to close your eyes.
Speaker 16: Why because I can sense your doubt and I am
Speaker 16: going to take those doubts away by dipping them in
Speaker 16: chocolate and caramel and.
Speaker 1: Selling it to a child. Sprinkle it with Oh, that's
Speaker 1: gonna context, or I take the child. That's money and
Speaker 1: your sorrows.
Speaker 6: Will be through.
Speaker 1: What do you feel that, Nicholas. Change is in the air.
Speaker 1: You're the candy band.
Speaker 9: This is the creepiest.
Speaker 1: Nicholas, that's all the time we have for today.
Speaker 9: What do you What are you talking about? We don't
Speaker 9: do anything.
Speaker 1: I want you to know that I don't accept cash payment.
Speaker 3: Good because I was going to listen.
Speaker 1: All I'm going to ask from you is that you
Speaker 1: sing to me.
Speaker 16: No, because months later, after you realize this advice has
Speaker 16: changed your life, you'll feel like, Wow, she really impacted me,
Speaker 16: and you'll just want to break out into song.
Speaker 9: Okay, stop?
Speaker 1: Did you ever know that I'm your heat? I can't
Speaker 1: hear you, Nicholas and everything you would like to be.
Speaker 9: Please stop playing music to me.
Speaker 5: You you can fly higher than an e gold.
Speaker 1: That's so high? Oh god, because I'm the wind beneath
Speaker 1: your weed.
Speaker 9: I'm pretty sure that's not how the song goes.
Speaker 16: That was from my heart, Nicholas, and also from your
Speaker 16: girlfriend Gina. What the one who set you up for
Speaker 16: this prank phone call?
Speaker 20: Oh my god, it's just a joke, okay, because a
Speaker 20: candy man can and so can Brook and Jeffrey in
Speaker 20: the morning.
Speaker 4: No, are you with me?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 9: Please don't sing anymore?
Speaker 5: Oh, Nicholas, we changed your life.
Speaker 9: You ruined my morning.
Speaker 16: Hey, listen, Gina just wanted to tell you that she's
Speaker 16: proud of you for following through on the life coach thing.
Speaker 1: And you know, after this, I don't even know if
Speaker 1: you're gonna need it.
Speaker 9: You fixed everything. I'm ready to sell candy to toddlers.
Speaker 8: On the web.
Speaker 1: I will expect five percent of the cut though.
Speaker 9: Great.
Speaker 14: The weak up every morning was funk taps weekday mornings
Speaker 14: on the Twenties, Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 3: It takes a lot to make me embarrassed. Yeah, because
Speaker 3: when you grow up with a mom who sends every
Speaker 3: person you date photos from your actual circumcision, you develop
Speaker 3: a pretty hard shell.
Speaker 1: Emotion that makes sense, that checks out.
Speaker 4: It's harder between the flap and the real one.
Speaker 10: But look there it is.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a very straight line.
Speaker 6: A right, honey.
Speaker 3: She showed you guys the pictures too. But today we
Speaker 3: heard something that got me actually read in the face
Speaker 3: because a very awkward and puzzling fact about one of
Speaker 3: our listeners gets exposed right here on the show, and
Speaker 3: it made every body in the room instantly uncomfortable. Oh,
Speaker 3: he swears that it's really common for men to have this,
Speaker 3: but all the women in the room agreed it was
Speaker 3: an instant dating deal breaking.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, this was to happen ouse.
Speaker 4: I agree.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're gonna hear it in your second date update
Speaker 3: right after this second date update. You know, we have
Speaker 3: rules on this show, and people tend to abuse those rules.
Speaker 1: What do you mean, I don't really like the rules,
Speaker 1: but looking.
Speaker 3: At several individuals in this room specifically.
Speaker 1: Come on, Jeff, be such a hall monitor.
Speaker 3: Yeah, screw the FCC whatever. Yeah, but you know, we
Speaker 3: did get an email for a second date update recently
Speaker 3: from a guy named Blake who says, you really should
Speaker 3: contact me because even though I technically went on two dates,
Speaker 3: it should only count as one because they were both
Speaker 3: super short.
Speaker 6: Oh two quick dates.
Speaker 3: He was one name.
Speaker 1: Sounds like two bad dates if they're that quick.
Speaker 3: Maybe, Blake, why were your dates so short?
Speaker 19: I mean, okay, so it's not my fault.
Speaker 8: I don't think. It's a few different things.
Speaker 3: I don't think, of course, I mean.
Speaker 14: It could be my fault.
Speaker 19: We just went to two different restaurants, and I researched
Speaker 19: them and went ones that were like the highest rated. Yeah,
Speaker 19: and they really did have like super super good service.
Speaker 19: But the problem is, and what I don't really want
Speaker 19: to complain about, you know, but also it just came
Speaker 19: out too quick. Oh, like we order in boom, food
Speaker 19: comes out.
Speaker 1: I mean, when you're at a fast food restaurant, that's
Speaker 1: going to happen.
Speaker 19: We went to a five star pizza place first, and
Speaker 19: then I just wanted to be casual, you know, but
Speaker 19: then I ordered out that I ordered the pizza in boom.
Speaker 3: It was there. Oh, let's rewind a little bit before
Speaker 3: we get into the food and the horribly fast service.
Speaker 8: Could what works?
Speaker 3: What's the name of the girl that you went out with?
Speaker 9: Her name is Kate?
Speaker 1: Okay, we always just guess assume you met her on
Speaker 1: an app or something.
Speaker 19: Yeah, we did. We met on a dating app?
Speaker 3: Okay, nice?
Speaker 1: And did she stand out for a particular reason?
Speaker 19: Her profile was kind of like quirky, Like it seemed
Speaker 19: like she was funny, you know what I mean, And
Speaker 19: she was really cute and it just seemed like we'd.
Speaker 8: Have a lot to talk about.
Speaker 14: Cool.
Speaker 3: So I mean, it's good that you went on two
Speaker 3: dates with her if they both went by that quickly, like,
Speaker 3: tell us what happened.
Speaker 19: So the first one was a piece of place, and
Speaker 19: then we went to another like kind of American like
Speaker 19: bar food, soul food type of thing. So I ordered
Speaker 19: mac and cheese, and again it came out and like
Speaker 19: literally and like that's the thing. I feel like such
Speaker 19: a I don't know, I don't like complaining about the
Speaker 19: food coming out so quick. But both these places, the
Speaker 19: food came out and mac and cheese. You don't want
Speaker 19: to let it get cold and hard, so you know,
Speaker 19: we were focused on the food.
Speaker 9: Again.
Speaker 21: It was like the one time you wanted the service
Speaker 21: to be slow, but even if it came out fast,
Speaker 21: like you would parlay that into Oh, I keep want
Speaker 21: to keep hanging out with you.
Speaker 1: Let's go get a drink.
Speaker 19: Yeah, no, I didn't plan before. And also I don't
Speaker 19: want to push it, you know, like I feel like
Speaker 19: first dates, you just kind of want to go to
Speaker 19: one spot to feel each other out, you know. Yeah,
Speaker 19: it's not like a whole like let's paint the town
Speaker 19: red things.
Speaker 1: Okay, So how is the feeling of each other out?
Speaker 3: How did she feel?
Speaker 8: Yeah?
Speaker 19: I don't know yet. I don't know yet, but no,
Speaker 19: I mean I think it went really well. She's really funny,
Speaker 19: she's cute, like I said, and I mean the conversation
Speaker 19: went seemed to float to, which is another thing.
Speaker 9: It went so fast.
Speaker 19: Her conversation was just like effortless.
Speaker 4: You know, Oh that's so good.
Speaker 13: It's like the date can take an hour and you
Speaker 13: feel like you've talked so long.
Speaker 4: It's like, wow, we've covered.
Speaker 9: So night things.
Speaker 19: So it really felt like thirty seconds whenever it took
Speaker 19: forty five minutes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, can I ask?
Speaker 2: Because now you have two dates to compare him to, right, like,
Speaker 2: and obviously she went out on a second date, so
Speaker 2: the first date full success?
Speaker 1: Right, was the end of the second date different? Did
Speaker 1: you get a different vibe than the end of the
Speaker 1: first date.
Speaker 19: I mean it was a little bit awkward because it
Speaker 19: felt rushed. I didn't know if it was like time
Speaker 19: should I go in for a kiss yet? So it
Speaker 19: was kind of more just like a just like a
Speaker 19: hug and goodbye. But it didn't seem crazy awkward, you
Speaker 19: know what I mean, Like I don't know if my
Speaker 19: radar is off, but it seemed like she was into it.
Speaker 4: This is you should have just kept ordering food. I
Speaker 4: got a sandwich, now, can I get this?
Speaker 6: That way, you're like meal prepping for your whole week,
Speaker 6: and you get more time.
Speaker 4: You're buying more.
Speaker 3: Time and then you look like a ball or signing
Speaker 3: a two thousand dollars ship.
Speaker 5: A competitive eater that's a good live like Joey.
Speaker 19: Chestnut over there, she might not want to get into
Speaker 19: a long term relationship with because my blood pressure is
Speaker 19: going to.
Speaker 8: Be so hot.
Speaker 3: Okay, I mean it sounds like the biggest problem for you.
Speaker 3: What you're saying is that everything went too quickly. You
Speaker 3: wanted to slow things down for your.
Speaker 19: Dates, right it Well, like I said, it went too quickly.
Speaker 19: Sometimes you kind of want one of those awkward pauses
Speaker 19: every once in a while, or something funny and cute
Speaker 19: to happen so you remember it. But it all just
Speaker 19: went so smooth, like it went perfectly, Which is that's.
Speaker 3: Your problem, Isn't it that the service is too fast,
Speaker 3: the conversation is too good.
Speaker 1: I don't know you're.
Speaker 12: In that short of a time.
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know that there's like somebody who's
Speaker 2: gonna not call someone back because it was too fast,
Speaker 2: too good.
Speaker 6: Like that's not This is going to sound weird, but.
Speaker 13: I kind of kind of see that because if there's
Speaker 13: not he said, there's nothing memorable that happened, there's nothing for.
Speaker 4: You to be like, oh, that was exciting, or that it.
Speaker 3: Was just too Yeah. I mean, if we're able to
Speaker 3: get Kate on the phone and convince her to do
Speaker 3: a third date, what's going to be your game plan
Speaker 3: for that to make sure you don't make the same mistakes.
Speaker 19: I was gonna think. I was thinking about a baseball game,
Speaker 19: but they have new rules in place to speed up
Speaker 19: the games or something.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, an hour and a half now, yeah, nice.
Speaker 19: They'll try and get me a gift card for the
Speaker 19: slowest restaurant in sound Yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay, it also sounds like you talk really fast.
Speaker 3: Maybe that's what it is. Okay, I'm excited, you know.
Speaker 4: It down He's like, okay, so.
Speaker 10: Hi, how are you?
Speaker 4: What's your name? How is your day?
Speaker 10: What do you do for a living?
Speaker 19: But it's charming and fast, that's what it is.
Speaker 14: All right.
Speaker 3: Well, we're gonna try and slow things down here for
Speaker 3: just a second, and then when we come back, we'll
Speaker 3: pick things back up. Call Kate for you and try
Speaker 3: to convince her to go out on a third date,
Speaker 3: hopefully much longer than the first two. Let me do
Speaker 3: a second date, update, second date update, two dinner dates,
Speaker 3: both at record speed.
Speaker 1: I feel like we should play faster music.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm afraid to do that just because of what'll
Speaker 3: happen to Blake's voice. He's a fast talker. But one
Speaker 3: was pizza, one was mac and cheese, and Blake basically
Speaker 3: told us that he blinked and the food was suddenly
Speaker 3: there in front of him, blinked again, the table was busting,
Speaker 3: the date was over. Ye, that's why he did two
Speaker 3: of them. But both times the service was just too quick.
Speaker 3: And I mean, here's what I think we need to do.
Speaker 3: We kind of need to game plan as a show
Speaker 3: before we make this call. I think that we shouldn't
Speaker 3: say that everything happened so quick when we call Kate, like,
Speaker 3: because she might have a different perspective on it, you
Speaker 3: know what I mean.
Speaker 2: It's usually not a negative thing, right, Like, if you
Speaker 2: feel like time passes quickly, it usually means that you
Speaker 2: had a great experience.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but he didn't say that. They ever actually talked
Speaker 3: about that. That was just his perception that the weight
Speaker 3: staff moved too quickly. So I think we ask her
Speaker 3: open ended questions, how do you feel about that?
Speaker 8: Blake?
Speaker 19: Yeah, I want to see what she thought too. I
Speaker 19: don't I don't know if I'm just like looking at
Speaker 19: it from a one side, like a single faceted for
Speaker 19: lack of that point.
Speaker 1: Do you know we never asked you. Are you guys
Speaker 1: texting or communicating it all?
Speaker 8: Not?
Speaker 19: Really, not as much as i'd like to. I mean,
Speaker 19: I've reached out to her a couple of times and
Speaker 19: chow kind and just be polite.
Speaker 1: But okay, you're getting cold from her via messages.
Speaker 19: Yeah, so that's why I came to you, guys.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, Well let's swoop in like the waiters at
Speaker 3: those restaurants real quick and just get things going. I'm
Speaker 3: gonna dial her number right now.
Speaker 1: You're gonna have such a hard time not mentioning that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you are the phone one time.
Speaker 3: Okay, well, thanks for having confidence in me. Here we go,
Speaker 3: number right now.
Speaker 7: Hello.
Speaker 3: Hey is this Kate?
Speaker 14: Yes, it is Hey, Kate.
Speaker 3: What's up? We're brooking Jeffrey in the Morning, a whole
Speaker 3: morning show from the radios.
Speaker 7: Here, you're from the radio. I don't know who you are.
Speaker 1: We also do a podcast, so that's cool.
Speaker 3: Didn't help. We do a segment on our show to
Speaker 3: help people with their dating lives. It's called Second Date Update.
Speaker 7: And you're calling me.
Speaker 1: Well, you don't need the help someone you went out
Speaker 1: with needs.
Speaker 3: Help, right, You're great at dating. That's what we've heard
Speaker 3: from one of our Yeah, from one of our listeners, Blake,
Speaker 3: who met up with you not once but twice.
Speaker 9: Oh gosh, Oh.
Speaker 1: It's azy question. All we want to know is like,
Speaker 1: how'd you feel about Blake?
Speaker 7: I mean, he was nice, Probably not the person for me,
Speaker 7: but he seem nice. I don't know.
Speaker 4: Okay, Well, did you like not have fun on the dates?
Speaker 7: Or were okay.
Speaker 6: Nice?
Speaker 1: And okay?
Speaker 4: Wait what did you say a little?
Speaker 7: What strange?
Speaker 3: Strange?
Speaker 1: Yeah, we kept talking to Blake and he did not
Speaker 1: bring up anything strange.
Speaker 3: What did you think about the length of the date?
Speaker 1: Is it?
Speaker 3: Mama Bear, Papa Bear or.
Speaker 1: Baby Bear told you he couldn't already ran out of.
Speaker 3: It, blanked out, So we got what'd you think, Mama Bear,
Speaker 3: Papa Bear, baby bear? About the length? Too short? Too long?
Speaker 7: Just right, you're at how long the date was in
Speaker 7: your experience? Okay?
Speaker 3: These are normal questions that radio hosts always ask.
Speaker 5: It so awkward sometimes I mean, I like you, I do,
Speaker 5: It's endearing.
Speaker 7: The length of the date was a normal length. I
Speaker 7: think that's a great answer.
Speaker 1: I mean, do you have to tell her why you
Speaker 1: asked that?
Speaker 3: Okay, well, because the reason that I'm asking is when
Speaker 3: we spoke to Blake, the impression that he got was
Speaker 3: that the service was really really good and delivered the
Speaker 3: food a little bit too quickly for his taste.
Speaker 2: Like he felt like maybe the date was rushed and
Speaker 2: he couldn't make the connection he wanted to with you.
Speaker 7: Like, the service was good. But both times that we ate,
Speaker 7: because we went to dinner, both times, he ate his
Speaker 7: meal super super fast.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, did I could see that when we
Speaker 1: were talking to him. He has a lot of energy.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I mean, imagine going to dinner with the cookie monster. Okay,
Speaker 7: it's thirty seconds, there's crumbs everywhere, and then they're done,
Speaker 7: Like how was he even.
Speaker 5: Picking anything up with those giant hens?
Speaker 3: And then he tries to teach you about letters afterwards.
Speaker 1: Remember the Bacarony cheese.
Speaker 2: When we talked to him, he mentioned, like, when you
Speaker 2: get the Macarty cheese, you got to eat it right
Speaker 2: away because if you don't eat it right away, then
Speaker 2: it's going to be cold.
Speaker 1: Is that what you're talking about?
Speaker 7: Yeah, he said that he would gag if the temperature
Speaker 7: of the cheese was like room temperature.
Speaker 3: Gag.
Speaker 1: Not really though, Like he just meant he didn't like
Speaker 1: it when it was room temperature.
Speaker 7: No, No, he meant he physically couldn't handle it, like
Speaker 7: he was going to hurl.
Speaker 1: It was a texture thing.
Speaker 8: Yea.
Speaker 3: How do you feel about that explanation?
Speaker 7: I mean it got worse to be honest with you,
Speaker 7: Like what really, Well, it started this really odd conversation
Speaker 7: about textures that he can and can't handle. Yeah, it
Speaker 7: just got me thinking, like I'm looking at him thinking, Okay,
Speaker 7: let's say we're in a serious relationship. Well, what would
Speaker 7: that be?
Speaker 8: Like?
Speaker 3: Well, I do think it's good that you are thinking
Speaker 3: about down the road, a future, possible long term relationship.
Speaker 7: I'm not anymore.
Speaker 12: Get through this.
Speaker 5: Is it just a little speed bumps?
Speaker 1: Yeah, a possible relationship.
Speaker 3: Ye, Poppy, right over that speed bump and connect you
Speaker 3: to Blake right now because he's on the other line
Speaker 3: listening and wants to talk to you.
Speaker 19: I don't think that that's that weird.
Speaker 8: People have textures, people have likes.
Speaker 5: And bake, Why do you start with a high coming?
Speaker 19: Hi, I'm sorry, we kind of hurt my feelings a
Speaker 19: little bit.
Speaker 8: I mean people are just let people beat people, you know.
Speaker 9: I mean, why is that we had a great time off?
Speaker 19: All the conversations were great. I theems like we were
Speaker 19: both kind of into the same stuff just because I
Speaker 19: eat weird.
Speaker 1: Did she hang up?
Speaker 3: Oh she's still there? Okay, No he was on the phone. Yeah. Sorry,
Speaker 3: that's how these work. But you'll go ahead and talk
Speaker 3: to Blake about his aversion to certain food textures.
Speaker 9: I think it's a normal thing.
Speaker 19: People have preferences.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's a little like I said, I'm not trying
Speaker 7: to be mean. It's just a little high maintenance. But
Speaker 7: I have to kind of bring up because it's not
Speaker 7: just the food thing. It's like the other thing that
Speaker 7: you said that you can't do.
Speaker 19: I don't think only when you talk about that on
Speaker 19: the radio.
Speaker 1: What's that, Blake? You can't leave us in the dark
Speaker 1: on stuff.
Speaker 3: That sounds important.
Speaker 19: I just prefer not to have it out in the open.
Speaker 2: Is it more embarrassing than you not being able to
Speaker 2: eat like potatoes or something.
Speaker 19: I don't think it's embarrassing. I think it's normal. Okay,
Speaker 19: then it's a more private kind of thing.
Speaker 3: Oh, there's a texture that you can't handle.
Speaker 19: It is the texture that I can't handle.
Speaker 8: Yeah, Okay, I don't get it.
Speaker 6: The picture of someone's lips like you'll never kiss her.
Speaker 3: If it's what I'm thinking that it is, maybe he's
Speaker 3: right and we shouldn't talk about this on the radio.
Speaker 1: I don't get it.
Speaker 4: I don't get any there back.
Speaker 12: So he thinks it's normal.
Speaker 1: What do you think that it is now, Jeffrey, Like,
Speaker 1: are you thinking something dirty?
Speaker 19: It's a little dirty.
Speaker 3: I think there's a part all.
Speaker 4: Right, way that's just that's too bad for you?
Speaker 3: Yeah, ok I mean are we right? Are we in
Speaker 3: the ballpark?
Speaker 7: I'm just gonna say to me, I know he has
Speaker 7: a texture issue, but intimacy is important.
Speaker 9: And I don't know how at home.
Speaker 5: Why we was talking about people time you're calling you.
Speaker 1: To find a woman to date, delivering that type of
Speaker 1: information on the first day.
Speaker 19: Yeah, that was the second date.
Speaker 14: It was the seconding.
Speaker 1: Okay. You know it's it's like a partnership.
Speaker 12: You give and you we know.
Speaker 3: Okay, So maybe Kate's willing to go without that part
Speaker 3: of relationship. You Kate, If you are, then we would
Speaker 3: pay for the third date that you and Blake went
Speaker 3: on to a place that doesn't serve any cheese whatsoever.
Speaker 16: K Are you.
Speaker 2: Interested still, because I think everybody here is just uncomfortable.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we are.
Speaker 7: I mean, you wouldn't want me to live a life
Speaker 7: like that, would you.
Speaker 10: You guys are.
Speaker 12: Something.
Speaker 2: What I tell my kids with food is that you
Speaker 2: have don't don't don't talk about your kids.
Speaker 3: Let's call the therapist before.
Speaker 4: Watch list.
Speaker 3: God, Blake, I am so sorry, boy, but this technically
Speaker 3: is all your fault and you do have some walk
Speaker 3: to do on yourself. My friend, I'll do my best.
Speaker 19: I'll try okay about this.
Speaker 3: Looking Jeffrey in the morning. This is the one time
Speaker 3: that I did want to do a part three and
Speaker 3: talk more about something the second date.
Speaker 1: I don't ever want to know how it goes for
Speaker 1: him me either.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I will say after we recorded it. Blake
Speaker 3: did email the show with five words. Oh, he said,
Speaker 3: I would if I could.
Speaker 1: Your response, maybe you're just not interested in women.
Speaker 10: Well, I don't think.
Speaker 3: It's not his fault. Did you hear his words? He
Speaker 3: would if he could. This man is just as tortured
Speaker 3: inside as she is. The desire to do something, the
Speaker 3: inability physical.
Speaker 1: Writing down the excuse I would if I could.
Speaker 3: That's a sweet thing to say to someone. Yeah, we
Speaker 3: do all sorts of stories on this show about tech
Speaker 3: trends and new inventions. Scientists better be working on this,
Speaker 3: make a pill for it or something they need to
Speaker 3: upgrade Blake, It's.
Speaker 1: Really not a rampant problem. I'm just telling you.
Speaker 14: It is a big.
Speaker 3: Problem though for him. He's going to be single for
Speaker 3: a long long time after this if they don't do
Speaker 3: something about it. But remember, you can always hear all
Speaker 3: of our second date updates on our podcast at Brook
Speaker 3: and Jeffrey. Go check it out. Make sure you follow
Speaker 3: and subscribe.
Speaker 1: Yes please, yeah, youse never miss us texture when you listen, it's.
Speaker 14: Perfect Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 3: It's Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. And I don't
Speaker 3: know if you follow us on Instagram at Brook and
Speaker 3: Jeffrey or individually, Alexis, where are you?
Speaker 7: What do you mean?
Speaker 6: My name?
Speaker 3: You're on Instagram?
Speaker 1: Know Instagram? You're like Alexis, Alexis understo.
Speaker 3: You're what I'm at, Hilary, Okay, Brook, that's your thing.
Speaker 1: I'm at Brook FoxBox too.
Speaker 3: I'm at It's Young Jeffrey. But for me, the most
Speaker 3: interesting thing that what we were on vacation was Brooks Instagram. Really,
Speaker 3: and the last thing that I want to do is
Speaker 3: criticize your children. I really, I don't want.
Speaker 6: To do that today overseas adventures.
Speaker 3: But when you travel the world with your family, you
Speaker 3: are a representative of our show and our country.
Speaker 1: I thought I was out there, we had so much fun.
Speaker 3: I don't know where you were, Slovenia or Estonia in
Speaker 3: those two places, but we were in Portugal. We all
Speaker 3: know you probably just you zoom tell whatever. We all
Speaker 3: know you probably just wrote off the vacation as a
Speaker 3: business extense for your shot. But the thing is, if
Speaker 3: you look at brooks Instagram from her trip, there's many
Speaker 3: videos of your kids doing silly faces and wild dance
Speaker 3: moves next to sacred spaces and historical landmarks, not taking
Speaker 3: it seriously, giggling in the World War two memorial, just
Speaker 3: having a good old time.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of sword fighting as well.
Speaker 19: Yeah, I.
Speaker 3: Would just say from now on, anytime you're leaving the
Speaker 3: country with Nora and Adler, read up on some of
Speaker 3: the local customs and the culture and try to show
Speaker 3: a little bit of respect.
Speaker 2: I'll try to be a better citizen into the world,
Speaker 2: try to insult all of Portugal.
Speaker 12: Which smiles.
Speaker 3: Good to take the rest of my comments off of
Speaker 3: the air, But would you like to apologize formally to
Speaker 3: the countries that you disgrace?
Speaker 1: I will after I go.
Speaker 2: Home and spank my children first, you know, it's obviously
Speaker 2: the punishment.
Speaker 1: I'll put them in the basement with my husband.
Speaker 5: Actually, would that make you feel better?
Speaker 7: There we go?
Speaker 3: Okay, well, there you go, lessons kids. It's half of
Speaker 3: an apology and some interesting things when Brooke goes home tonight.
Speaker 3: But a really exciting edition of Laser Stories that's coming
Speaker 3: out right after this. It's the radio segment that wants
Speaker 3: to get fit for the new year, but his invention
Speaker 3: of a sushi conveyor belt around a peloton just isn't helping.
Speaker 1: So good though it's a delicious it's.
Speaker 3: A laser story. It's the segment where we read weird
Speaker 3: news stories around the globe, just like everyone else does,
Speaker 3: except we've got a laser as other Sashimi Weeni's just done.
Speaker 3: First Lanser Stories out of Scotland. A guy in his
Speaker 3: thirties was recently driving on a Scottish highway when he
Speaker 3: had to sneeze, and he decided he would try to
Speaker 3: hold it in.
Speaker 6: Oh it's not a good idea to hold to sneeze it.
Speaker 3: But if you know, if you sneeze, you close your
Speaker 3: eyes for a second. And he's driving fast on the
Speaker 3: freeway with lots of cars around. Didn't want to skin.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, got it.
Speaker 4: You can try to stop it.
Speaker 2: I've driven in Scotland and I swear to God the
Speaker 2: roads are three feet across.
Speaker 5: It is the scariest, scariest experience.
Speaker 3: He closed his mouth and pinched his nose, but still sneezed,
Speaker 3: and he ended up tearing a hole in his throat.
Speaker 5: Oh my god, you can't do that. That could happen.
Speaker 3: He showed up at a hospital in severe pain, and
Speaker 3: a scan showed a two millimeter tear in his windpipe.
Speaker 3: The technical term for it is spontaneous tracheal perforation.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm glad to close his eyes. I've heard
Speaker 1: your eyeballs can pop out of your head. You do
Speaker 1: it with your eyes open.
Speaker 3: We should try it for a video broken jactly, but
Speaker 3: this rarely happens that way. Doctors could only find a
Speaker 3: handful of pieces where you tear your throat from sneezing.
Speaker 1: So he's like, I'm the lucky one.
Speaker 3: Thankfully he is okay and didn't even need surgery for it.
Speaker 3: They just gave him some painkillers and put a large
Speaker 3: band aid over it, and the tear should heal itself
Speaker 3: within a few weeks.
Speaker 4: This is your worst nimer, Jeff.
Speaker 2: If you tore your throat, your whole careers over Oh please,
Speaker 2: all his recreation is over to.
Speaker 10: That's true.
Speaker 3: Yeah, actually I kind of want to do it now.
Speaker 3: Experts do. The story teaches people they should never try
Speaker 3: to hold in a sneeze like that. If you plug
Speaker 3: your nose, the pressure in your upper airway can be
Speaker 3: twenty times what it normally.
Speaker 10: Makes a fly man.
Speaker 3: It feels so good to say. It can also cause
Speaker 3: ruptured ear drums, broken ribs, or even an aneurysm.
Speaker 1: Wow, oh my god. Okay, so lucky he's alive.
Speaker 3: Sneeze, just let it out. Yeah, this next lazer stories
Speaker 3: out of Beauty head Quarters.
Speaker 1: I haven't been here a while.
Speaker 3: So fest shoppers everywhere are warning others against buying the
Speaker 3: Soul Dejanio Delicia Drenched body Butter. Yeah, the body butter,
Speaker 3: though not doing good, not because of a bad skin reaction.
Speaker 3: Apparently it attracts wolf spiders.
Speaker 4: Oh god, the old spiders are hairy.
Speaker 3: And that's the rumor of it. And it all began
Speaker 3: with a review saying I wanted to love this lotion
Speaker 3: so bad, but when I put it on, instantly a
Speaker 3: large brown, hairy spiders showed.
Speaker 12: A telling you, this is what I have, So.
Speaker 3: It keeps going. I thought it was a coincidence. Then
Speaker 3: it kept happening. I stopped using the lotion and haven't
Speaker 3: seen one since, and the hoar didn't stop. There More
Speaker 3: reviewers weighed in, saying I like the smell in consistency. However,
Speaker 3: every time I've worn this, I've known as spiders.
Speaker 12: You guys do wild?
Speaker 7: Wait?
Speaker 1: Are spiders that well moisturized? Like rubbing it on all
Speaker 1: eight of their hands.
Speaker 3: Another said that she had to call multiple people because
Speaker 3: she can't even sleep in her own house anymore. There's
Speaker 3: really literally a family of wolf spiders living in every
Speaker 3: single room since she bought that lotion.
Speaker 1: Girl, throw it out.
Speaker 15: I know, you guys, it's so expensive you don't understand,
Speaker 15: like fifty dollars, so that you're pissed that the wolf
Speaker 15: spiders would try to see.
Speaker 3: That She's like wow, or just bust it out for
Speaker 3: Halloween when you need to decorate. So why is this happening.
Speaker 3: There's a theory that the lotion works just like the
Speaker 3: pheromones of the spider, and it's basically signaling sexual communication.
Speaker 3: They're not just spiders. There's spiders better down.
Speaker 5: So you're not attractive to other humans, but spiders want you.
Speaker 6: By spider just weave a web into an eggplane.
Speaker 3: As for Sophora's take, they say it's a rumor based
Speaker 3: on one review and the story is totally made up.
Speaker 3: But there was an investigation on the Sephora subreddit of
Speaker 3: people who claim they applied a sample of the lotion
Speaker 3: on a piece of tissue and according to them, it
Speaker 3: attracted eight spiders in a single day day.
Speaker 1: Spiders were so thirsty.
Speaker 3: This next laser story is out of the impossible world
Speaker 3: of possibilities.
Speaker 10: I'm confused.
Speaker 1: Let's go.
Speaker 3: There's basically a Guinness World's Record for everything. Yeah, and
Speaker 3: I say that because the organization keeps a database of
Speaker 3: more than forty thousand feets, and a popular publication just
Speaker 3: put together a list of the oddest ones from this
Speaker 3: past year this year the ones that were set last year.
Speaker 3: Number five longest distance full body burn run without oxygen.
Speaker 11: I don't like that.
Speaker 3: That's basically running on fire and you don't have an
Speaker 3: oxygen tank or anything to breathe.
Speaker 12: How long? How long?
Speaker 3: So there's the guy doing it.
Speaker 1: I thought you were talking about running over coals or something.
Speaker 3: This guy is on fig set you on fire. The
Speaker 3: record is two hundred and seventy two point two five
Speaker 3: meters or just over eight hundred and ninety three feet.
Speaker 1: That's the only way some people would run on fire.
Speaker 6: It is the opposite to stop dropping roll.
Speaker 4: It's like, get up and run as fast.
Speaker 3: Number four longest tongue on a living dog on a dog.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm glad it's not a dead dog. That would
Speaker 1: be a sadder picture that you're about to pass around.
Speaker 3: The record is thirteen point nine centimeters, which is almost
Speaker 3: five and a half inches long.
Speaker 19: Long.
Speaker 3: You see the photo, it just flaps out.
Speaker 1: Of it's like almost it's like double his mouth leg. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's kind of freaky.
Speaker 3: The third weirdest Guinness record achieved last year most magic
Speaker 3: tricks performed underwater in three minutes.
Speaker 12: But how do you practice for the video Waterproof.
Speaker 3: Not just all card tricks. The bunny out of the
Speaker 3: hat trick is really sad when the new record was
Speaker 3: thirty eight tricks performed in under three minutes by a
Speaker 3: thirteen year old girl who's also an avid scuba diver.
Speaker 4: That makes it better.
Speaker 12: It's not like a fifty year old man so sad.
Speaker 1: That it's the new record. There was a previous.
Speaker 14: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Second on the list is a fastest five meters on
Speaker 3: a scooter by a parrot. We go parrot except by
Speaker 3: a parent named Chico who lives in Bulgaria. It's a
Speaker 3: little scooter that's his side, like a little handle where
Speaker 3: his beat can clamp onto.
Speaker 1: That's so cute, So.
Speaker 3: He lives in Bulgaria. His record is fourteen point six
Speaker 3: seconds on the scooter, going almost sixteen feet. And finally,
Speaker 3: I know I failed the Caprice Sun record years ago
Speaker 3: over a technicality, but I plan to go down in
Speaker 3: history after I break this new one.
Speaker 1: Do we have a new one?
Speaker 3: Fastest time to assemble a mister potato head while blindfolded?
Speaker 1: Do you have the right place?
Speaker 19: Yes?
Speaker 3: They all have to go in the face, and the
Speaker 3: record is eleven point five seconds to complete show.
Speaker 5: Second, if you practice, I think you could.
Speaker 3: I don't need to practice. I have an advantage.
Speaker 19: What is that?
Speaker 3: I have been blindfolded many many times before, mostly by
Speaker 3: this gap who also set a new record last year
Speaker 3: most thrusts in a bagel factory. Why did he do
Speaker 3: it for?
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 12: I'm not sure.
Speaker 1: We go with the shoe the fruit.
Speaker 3: That sound means Laser Stories has come to an end
Speaker 3: for the day. We'll do it again, same time on.
Speaker 14: Friday, Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 22: We've got a first time player to the show named
Speaker 22: Darrin who works for a local municipality.
Speaker 1: That's how he got this badass music plays.
Speaker 22: That's right, we're talking public works, heavy equipment, hunting down utilities.
Speaker 22: Darren says he's a one stop toolbox translation a man's man.
Speaker 22: Say hello and let the world hear what pure testosterone
Speaker 22: sounds like.
Speaker 8: Hey, guys, how's you going?
Speaker 22: Oh?
Speaker 6: Savage on the ball?
Speaker 1: Actually, I like I could feel that, you know, like
Speaker 1: blew into my face?
Speaker 16: Man.
Speaker 3: All right, let's turn the music down so we can
Speaker 3: actually hear that. Darren, what's up, my man?
Speaker 8: Not much? How's it going today?
Speaker 14: Guys?
Speaker 1: Can you even wear a shirt? Do they just like
Speaker 1: bust off as soon as he put him on. You know,
Speaker 1: your big muscles and.
Speaker 9: Stuff, they're pretty tight.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's got the scretchy kind so that they don't
Speaker 3: bust off. He knows what he's doing. Yeah, Darren, we
Speaker 3: appreciate having you on. We're gonna send Brook out of
Speaker 3: the studio and while she leaves, you know, the game works.
Speaker 3: He got thirty seconds to answer as many questions as possible.
Speaker 3: If you don't know when, you could say past. But
Speaker 3: you do have to beat Brook outright to win. Are
Speaker 3: you ready?
Speaker 8: I am?
Speaker 3: Good luck, my man. Your time starts now. Mel Gibson
Speaker 3: celebrates a birthday today. He was born in the US,
Speaker 3: but grew up in what country England, Australia or New Zealand.
Speaker 3: What part of the body is affected by tonightis?
Speaker 8: That's the joint?
Speaker 3: A prickle is a word used to describe a grouping
Speaker 3: of what animal Nick Carter was in, which boy band,
Speaker 3: Which state shares the longest border with Canada as lost
Speaker 3: Yale for the first fifteen years of its existence. What
Speaker 3: was the only Gatorade flavor available? Solid work there? Darren
Speaker 3: Brook's gonna come back into the studio and I'm just
Speaker 3: checking out my phone screener here because our producer talked
Speaker 3: to you before. It says the highlight of Darren's life
Speaker 3: is his two children and when he got married. What
Speaker 3: does your wife right next to you with your kids.
Speaker 8: In the car? Actually no, no, she's stayed in lie
Speaker 8: he's at the hospital.
Speaker 9: She's not endow.
Speaker 1: How old are the kids?
Speaker 8: Everly is five and Logan is one and a half.
Speaker 3: Oh, he didn't even hesitate to think of their ages.
Speaker 3: That's a good dash.
Speaker 1: And thank you he remembered their names correct.
Speaker 3: Yeah, all right, Brooks, your turn, you're ready? Yeah, your
Speaker 3: time starts now. Mel Gibson celebrates a birthday today. He
Speaker 3: was born in the US, but grew up in what
Speaker 3: country England, Australia or New Zealand?
Speaker 1: England.
Speaker 3: What part of the body is affected by.
Speaker 1: Tonightis tonightas is your elbow.
Speaker 3: A prickle is a word used to describe a grouping
Speaker 3: of what animal.
Speaker 1: Oh, cute porcupines?
Speaker 3: Nick Carter was in which boy band Backstreet Boys. Which
Speaker 3: state shares the longest border with Canada, Washington for the
Speaker 3: first fifteen years of its existence. What was the only
Speaker 3: gatorade flavor available?
Speaker 5: Read the flavor red.
Speaker 1: Orange because of f s.
Speaker 3: Okay, well those aren't flavors, those are colors. But we'll
Speaker 3: go over the difference between that later. First world of
Speaker 3: the scoreboard with jose do you like f do you
Speaker 3: like fruit?
Speaker 6: That was me as a kid, Darren, you got to
Speaker 6: correct today.
Speaker 1: That's all right. I don't think I did very well.
Speaker 4: It was a good game. It was a barn burner.
Speaker 4: You broke out the same amount.
Speaker 1: Of questions and give me to at least also.
Speaker 3: Tied up at two, which means it's going to go
Speaker 3: to the house on this one, Darren. I'm sorry. Let's
Speaker 3: get these answers in real quick. Mel Gibson celebrates a
Speaker 3: birthday today. Born in the US, but grew up in Australia.
Speaker 3: Never do Yeah, I don't really detect an accent there,
Speaker 3: do you?
Speaker 14: Not?
Speaker 2: Really following the mel Gibson news as of late? Really
Speaker 2: high on my list of likable people.
Speaker 8: Yeah.
Speaker 19: Miss.
Speaker 3: What part of the body is affected by tonight? That
Speaker 3: would be your ears. When you have likestant ringing or
Speaker 3: buzzing in your ears, that's tonights. A prickle is a
Speaker 3: word used to describe a group of porcupines.
Speaker 1: Is so cute?
Speaker 3: Nick Carter is part of the boy band Backstreet Boys.
Speaker 3: The state that shares the longest border with Canada is Alaska,
Speaker 3: oh thousand, five and thirty eight miles long.
Speaker 1: Once you say it, yeah, wasn't it.
Speaker 3: Probably a little bit longer than Washington's border. And the
Speaker 3: first fifteen years of Gatorade's existence, the only flavor available
Speaker 3: was lemon lime, as Brook knows it, yellow green yellow, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 19: I do.
Speaker 1: People actually say I want lemon lime Gatorade.
Speaker 3: That's how Darren answered it. Lemon lime.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I just asked for the color.
Speaker 3: Is that how you order food to just Gatorade?
Speaker 1: Caterade?
Speaker 4: Can I get a starter green?
Speaker 8: Yeah?
Speaker 4: With so side of white dressing.
Speaker 3: And some of the brown meat brown meat medium rare
Speaker 3: so good now, Darren Unfortunately wasn't enough to beat Brook today.
Speaker 3: But just for playing, you do win a twenty five
Speaker 3: dollars gift card valid at any twenty five dollars Disney
Speaker 3: gift card at any Disney resort, theme park, or online
Speaker 3: in the Disney Store.
Speaker 8: Thank you very much, guys, everally love this one.
Speaker 1: Thanks for being so manly and being on the show
Speaker 1: with us.
Speaker 9: Yeahs, all right, thank you guys.
Speaker 8: Have a good one.
Speaker 3: Thanks for playing. We'll be back to win Brooks Bucks
Speaker 3: same time tomorrow, brook and Jeffrey in the morning.