Speaker 1: M oh Nerds, Nerds, Nerds, Hello, this is let's talk
Speaker 1: about Mitts baby, and I am that woman, that host
Speaker 1: of yours, she who loves this ship live. Now you
Speaker 1: may be thinking, wait a minute, it's Tuesday. Why am
Speaker 1: I listening to a reading episode? Well, I promise I've
Speaker 1: got a good answer for you while you listen to
Speaker 1: this reading episode, which, by the way, is so worth
Speaker 1: it for a Tuesday, because this ship is wild, I
Speaker 1: will be visiting the Greek island of samoth Race. This
Speaker 1: is to say this is a dream of mine is
Speaker 1: like a complete understatement. It doesn't even begin to describe
Speaker 1: how I feel about being able to visit Samothrace, which
Speaker 1: leads me to very quickly. This was recorded far far
Speaker 1: in what is now the past, back in February. Actually,
Speaker 1: so if the world has changed and is even more
Speaker 1: on fire than it is right now, then I'm sorry
Speaker 1: that I'm not addressing it. I am much to my
Speaker 1: own chagrin slash. Let's be honest, it's definitely for the best.
Speaker 1: I am not the goddess of foresight famous. So why Samothrace?
Speaker 1: Why should you, my listeners care that I am on
Speaker 1: this island of samo Race? Well, let me tell you.
Speaker 1: Samothrace is a tiny island in the furthest northeastern reaches
Speaker 1: of the Greek island, so close to Turkey and the
Speaker 1: north an edge of Greece. It is tiny, and one
Speaker 1: would think, and it certainly was for a time, and
Speaker 1: it was fairly inconsequential. I mean, there are so many
Speaker 1: Greek islands, how does one keep track? But Samothrace, you see,
Speaker 1: is a mythological birthplace or mythological home of my high girl,
Speaker 1: my favorite mythological character that isn't Medusa Harmonia. Samothrace is
Speaker 1: also the home of the Samothracian Mysteries, the second most
Speaker 1: important mystery cult of ancient Greece. You might know it
Speaker 1: though as the home of Winged Victory, the incredible Hellenistic
Speaker 1: statue now housed in the louver of a headless and
Speaker 1: armless goddess Nike and her stunning and detailed feathered wings.
Speaker 1: This was found in Samothrace at the side of the
Speaker 1: ancient sanctuary where the mysteries took place. So I'm visiting
Speaker 1: to see it all and to write my novel and
Speaker 1: to just take in the history. But I'm going to
Speaker 1: share it with you two. I don't know how or
Speaker 1: when yet I'm taking that time off so I'm just
Speaker 1: writing the book, but I will share some things with
Speaker 1: you about this interesting island and so few people know
Speaker 1: anything about safer Winged Victory. But in the meantime, listen
Speaker 1: to this reading episode and know that you have it
Speaker 1: because I'm finally, finally in the right place to finish
Speaker 1: writing my fucking novel. Hopefully funk I better finish it,
Speaker 1: or rather finish a draft worthy of human consumption. Fingers
Speaker 1: crossed right now? Lucien? Who was Lucien? Is it Lucian?
Speaker 1: We're going with Lucien. This is a new name for
Speaker 1: you listeners. I haven't referenced him before, nor have I
Speaker 1: used him as a source as far as I know,
Speaker 1: and that is because well, his work is unique. Lucian
Speaker 1: was a Greek author of the Roman period. But he
Speaker 1: was from Roman Syria but modern Turkey. Yeah, make that
Speaker 1: makes sense, but still it does. He wrote in Greek.
Speaker 1: He was from regions that were taken over by the
Speaker 1: Greeks before they were taken over by the Romans. Imperialism, right.
Speaker 1: Lucian lived in the second century a d where he
Speaker 1: wrote well satire but specifically sarcastic satire. I don't typically
Speaker 1: use Wikipedia for anything, I promise, but there's a line
Speaker 1: about Lucian that's too good not to share. I'm using
Speaker 1: it now just to get an idea of him so
Speaker 1: I can share it with you before I read this,
Speaker 1: and this sums him up pretty well. Quote. Everything that
Speaker 1: is known about Lucian's life comes from his own writings,
Speaker 1: which are often difficult to interpret because of his extensive
Speaker 1: use of sarcasm. Truly a man after my own heart.
Speaker 1: Lucian's most famous work is what I'm reading today, the
Speaker 1: True History or the True Story, which is something else.
Speaker 1: It's a satire, but it's a satire like well, my
Speaker 1: whole podcast. Okay, not really, but it is the satire
Speaker 1: of the world Lucian comes from and the mythological works
Speaker 1: treated as history. He was having fun with the popular
Speaker 1: writers of the time and the historical right, presenting something
Speaker 1: basically just making fun of mythology, history, everything, and I'm
Speaker 1: so here for it. It is also sometimes referred to
Speaker 1: as the first science fiction because it's satire. I would
Speaker 1: say that Queen Mary Shelley still holds that title. Belutions
Speaker 1: does get special credit for satirically and sarcastically introducing the
Speaker 1: idea of space travel. Yep, you heard me, space travel.
Speaker 1: This is Lucitions True History, translated by Francis Hicks, Part one.
Speaker 1: Even as champions and wrestlers and such has practiced the
Speaker 1: strength and agility of body, are not only careful to
Speaker 1: retain a sound constitution of health and to hold on
Speaker 1: their ordinary course of exercise, but sometimes also to recreate
Speaker 1: themselves with seasonable intermission and esteem. It is main point
Speaker 1: of their practice. So I think it necessary for scholars
Speaker 1: and such as addict themselves to the study of learning,
Speaker 1: after they have traveled long in the perusal of serious authors,
Speaker 1: to relax a little the intention of their thoughts, that
Speaker 1: they might be more apt and able to endure a
Speaker 1: continued course of study. And this kind of repose will
Speaker 1: be the more conformable and fit their purpose better if
Speaker 1: it be employed in the reading of such works as
Speaker 1: shall not only yield a bare content by the pleasing
Speaker 1: and comely composure of them, but shall also give occasion
Speaker 1: of some learned speculation to the mind, which I suppose
Speaker 1: I have affected in these books of mine, wherein not
Speaker 1: only the novelty of the subject, nor the pleasingness of
Speaker 1: the project may tickle the reader with delight, nor to
Speaker 1: hear so many notorious lies delivered persuasively and in the
Speaker 1: way of truth. But because everything here by me set down,
Speaker 1: doth in a comical fashion glanced at some or other
Speaker 1: of the old poets, historiographers, and philosophers, which, in their
Speaker 1: writing have recorded many monstrous and intolerable untruths, whose names
Speaker 1: I would have quoted down, but that I knew the
Speaker 1: reading would betray them to you. Ctessius, the son of
Speaker 1: Ctessiachus the Canadian, wrote of the region of the Indians,
Speaker 1: and the state of those countries matters what she neither
Speaker 1: saw himself, nor ever heard come from the mouth of
Speaker 1: any man. I am Uless also wrote many range miracles
Speaker 1: of the great Sea, which all men knew to be
Speaker 1: lies and fictions, yet so composed that they want not
Speaker 1: their delight. And many others have made choice of the
Speaker 1: like argument, of which some have published their own travels
Speaker 1: and peregrinations, wherein they have described the greatness of beasts,
Speaker 1: the fierce condition of men, with their strange and uncouth
Speaker 1: manner of life. But the first father and founder of
Speaker 1: all this foolery was Homer's Odysseus, who tells a long
Speaker 1: tale to Alcinous, of the servitude of the winds, and
Speaker 1: of wild men with one eye, and their foreheads that
Speaker 1: fed upon raw flesh, of beasts with many heads, and
Speaker 1: the transformation of his friends by enchanted potions, all which
Speaker 1: he made the silly feations believe for great sooth. This
Speaker 1: coming to my perusal, I could not condemn ordinary men
Speaker 1: for lying when I saw it request amongst them that
Speaker 1: would be counted philosophical persons. Yet could not but wonder
Speaker 1: at them that writing so manifest lies they should not
Speaker 1: think to be taken with the manner. And this made
Speaker 1: me also ambitious to leave some monument of myself behind me,
Speaker 1: that I might not be the only man exempted from
Speaker 1: this liberty of lying. And because I had no matter
Speaker 1: of verity to employ my pen in for nothing eth
Speaker 1: but fallen me worth the writing, I turned my style
Speaker 1: to publish untruths, but with an honester mind than others
Speaker 1: have done. For this one thing, I confidently pronounced for
Speaker 1: a truth that I lie, And this, I hope maybe
Speaker 1: an excuse for all the rest. When I could confess
Speaker 1: what I am faulty in for I write of matters
Speaker 1: which I neither saw, nor suffered, nor heard by report
Speaker 1: from others, which are in no being, nor possible ever
Speaker 1: to have a beginning. Let no man, therefore, in any
Speaker 1: case give any credit to them. Disanchoring on a time
Speaker 1: from the pillars of Hercules, the wind fitting me well
Speaker 1: for my purpose, I thrust into the West Ocean. The
Speaker 1: occasion that moved me to take such a voyage in
Speaker 1: hand was only a curiosity of mind, a desire of novelties,
Speaker 1: and a longing to learn out the bounds of the
Speaker 1: ocean and what people inhabit the farther shore, for which
Speaker 1: purpose I made plentiful provision of victuals and fresh water,
Speaker 1: got fifty companions of the same humor to associate me
Speaker 1: in my travels, furnished myself with store of munition, gave
Speaker 1: a round sum of money to an expert pilot that
Speaker 1: could direct us in our course, and new rigged and
Speaker 1: repaired a tall ship strongly to hold a tedious and
Speaker 1: difficult journey. Thus sailed we forward a day and a
Speaker 1: night with a prosperous wind, and as long as we
Speaker 1: had any sight of land, made no great haste on
Speaker 1: our way. But the next morrow, about sunrising, the wind
Speaker 1: blew high, and the waves began to swell, and a
Speaker 1: darkness fell upon us, so that we could not see
Speaker 1: to strike our sails, but gave our ship over to
Speaker 1: the wind and weather. Thus were we tossed in this
Speaker 1: tempest the space of three score and nineteen days together.
Speaker 1: On the four score day, the sun upon a sudden breakout,
Speaker 1: and we saw not far off us an island full
Speaker 1: of mountains and woods, about the which the seas did
Speaker 1: not rage so boisterously, for the storm was now reasonably
Speaker 1: well calmed. There we thrust in and went on shore,
Speaker 1: and cast ourselves upon the ground, and so lay a
Speaker 1: long time as utterly tired with our misery at sea.
Speaker 1: In the end we arose and divided ourselves. Thirty we
Speaker 1: left to guard our ship. Myself, and twenty more went
Speaker 1: to discover the island, and had not gone about three
Speaker 1: furlongs from the sea through a wood, but we saw
Speaker 1: a brazen pillar erected, whereupon Greek letters were engraven, though
Speaker 1: now much worn and hard to be discerned, importing thus
Speaker 1: far traveled Hercules and Bacchus. They were also near unto
Speaker 1: the place. Two portraitures cut out in a rock, the
Speaker 1: one of the quantity of an acre of ground, the
Speaker 1: other less, which made me imagine the lesser to be
Speaker 1: Bacchus and the other Hercules, and giving them due at ooration,
Speaker 1: we proceeded on our journey, and far we had not gone,
Speaker 1: but we came to a river, the stream whereof seemed
Speaker 1: to run with as rich wine as any is made
Speaker 1: in Chios, and of a great breadth, in some places
Speaker 1: able to bear a ship, which made me to give
Speaker 1: more credit to the inscription upon the pillar, which I
Speaker 1: saw such apparent signs of Bacchus's peregrination. We then resolved
Speaker 1: to travel up the stream to find whence the river
Speaker 1: had his original, And when we were come to the head,
Speaker 1: no spring at all appeared, but mighty great vine trees
Speaker 1: of infinite number, which from their roots distilled pure wine,
Speaker 1: which made the river run so abundantly. The stream was
Speaker 1: also well stored with fish, of which we took a few,
Speaker 1: in taste and color much resembling wine, But as many
Speaker 1: as eight of them fell drunk upon it, for when
Speaker 1: they were opened and cut up, we found them to
Speaker 1: be full of Lea's. Afterwards, we mixed some fresh water
Speaker 1: fish with them, which allayed the strong taste of the wine.
Speaker 1: We then crossed the stream, where we found it passable,
Speaker 1: and came among a world of vines of incredible number,
Speaker 1: which towards the earth, had firm stalks and of good growth.
Speaker 1: But the tops of them were women, from the hip upwards,
Speaker 1: having all their proportion perfect and complete, as painters paint
Speaker 1: out Daphne, who was turned into a tree when she
Speaker 1: was overtaken by Apollo. At their fingers ends sprung out
Speaker 1: branches full of grapes, and the hair of their heads
Speaker 1: was nothing else but winding wires and leaves and clusters
Speaker 1: of grapes. When we were come to them, they saluted
Speaker 1: us and joined hands with us, and spoke unto us
Speaker 1: in some the Lydian and some in the Indian language,
Speaker 1: but most of them in Greek. They also kissed us
Speaker 1: with their mouths, but he that was so kissed fell
Speaker 1: drunk and was not his own man. A good while
Speaker 1: after they could not abide to have any fruit pulled
Speaker 1: from them, but would roar and cry out pitifully if
Speaker 1: any man offered it. Some of them desired to have
Speaker 1: carnal mixture with us, and two of our company were
Speaker 1: so bold as to entertain their offer, and could never
Speaker 1: afterwards be loosed from them, but were knitfast together at
Speaker 1: their never arts. From whence they grew together and took
Speaker 1: root together, and their fingers began to sprout out with
Speaker 1: branches and crooked wires, as if they were ready to
Speaker 1: bring out fruit. Whereupon we forsook them and fled to
Speaker 1: our ships, and told the company at our coming what
Speaker 1: we had seen how our fellows were entangled, and of
Speaker 1: their copulation with the vines. Then we took certain of
Speaker 1: our vessels and filled them, some with water and some
Speaker 1: with wine, out of the river, and lodged for that
Speaker 1: night near the shore. On the morrow we put out
Speaker 1: to sea again, the wind serving us weakly. But about noon,
Speaker 1: when we had lost sight of the island, upon a
Speaker 1: sudden whirlwind caught us, which turned our ship round about
Speaker 1: and lifted us up some three thousand furlongs into the air,
Speaker 1: and suffered us not to settle again into the sea.
Speaker 1: But we hung above ground and were carried a offt
Speaker 1: with a mighty wind, which filled our sails strongly. Thus,
Speaker 1: for seven days space and so many nights were we
Speaker 1: driven along in that matter, And on the eighth day
Speaker 1: we came in view of a great country in the air,
Speaker 1: like to a shining island of around proportion, gloriously glittering
Speaker 1: with light. And approaching it, we there arrived and took land,
Speaker 1: And surveying the country, we found it to be both
Speaker 1: inhabited and husbanded. And as long as the day lasted
Speaker 1: we could see nothing there. But when night was come,
Speaker 1: many other islands appeared unto us, some greater and some less,
Speaker 1: all of the color of fire, and another kind of
Speaker 1: earth underneath, in which were cities and seas, and rivers,
Speaker 1: and woods and mountains, which we conjectured to be the
Speaker 1: earth by us inhabited. And going further into the land,
Speaker 1: we were met withal and taken by those kind of people,
Speaker 1: which they called Hippogyppians. These Hippogyppians are men riding upon
Speaker 1: monstrous vultures, which they use instead of horses. For the
Speaker 1: vultures are exceedingly great, everyone with three heads apiece. You
Speaker 1: may imagine their greatness by this, for every feather in
Speaker 1: their wings was bigger and longer than the mast of
Speaker 1: a tall ship. Their charge was to fly about the
Speaker 1: country and all the strangers they found, to bring them
Speaker 1: to the king, and their fortune was then to seize
Speaker 1: upon us, and by them we were presented to him.
Speaker 1: As soon as he saw us, he conjectured, by our
Speaker 1: habit what countrymen we were, and said, are not you
Speaker 1: strangers grecians? Which when we affirmed, and how could you
Speaker 1: make way? Said he threw so much air as to
Speaker 1: get here. Then we delivered the whole discourse of our
Speaker 1: fortunes to him, whereupon he began to tell us likewise
Speaker 1: of his own adventures, how that he was also a
Speaker 1: man by name and Dimion, and wrapped up long since
Speaker 1: from the earth as he was asleep, and brought hither
Speaker 1: where he was made king of the country, and said
Speaker 1: it was that region which to us below seemed to
Speaker 1: be the moon. But he bade us be of good
Speaker 1: cheer and fear no danger, for we should want nothing
Speaker 1: we stood in need of. And if the war he
Speaker 1: was now in hand withal against the Sun succeeded, fortunately
Speaker 1: we should live with him in the highest degrees of happiness.
Speaker 1: Then we asked of him what enemies he had in
Speaker 1: the cause of the quarrel, and he answered, fithon the
Speaker 1: king of the inhabitants of the Sun, for that is
Speaker 1: also peopled as well as the moon hath made war
Speaker 1: against us a long time. Upon this occasion, I once
Speaker 1: assembled all the poor people and needy persons within my dominions,
Speaker 1: purposing to send a colony to inhabit the Morning Star,
Speaker 1: because the country was deserted and had nobody dwelling in it.
Speaker 1: This faith on envied crossed me in my design and
Speaker 1: sent his Hippomrmix to meet with us in the midway,
Speaker 1: by whom we were surprised at that time, being not
Speaker 1: prepared for an encounter, and were forced to retire. Now, therefore,
Speaker 1: my purpose is once again to denounce war and publish
Speaker 1: a plantation of people there. If therefore you will participate
Speaker 1: with us in our expedition, I will furnish you everyone
Speaker 1: with a prime vulture and all armor answerable for service.
Speaker 1: For tomorrow we must set forwards with all our hearts,
Speaker 1: said I, if it please you. Then were we feasted
Speaker 1: and abode with him, and in the morning arose to
Speaker 1: set ourselves in order of battle, for our scouts had
Speaker 1: given us knowledge that enemy was at hand. Our forces
Speaker 1: in number amounted to a hundred thousand, besides such as
Speaker 1: bare burthens and engineers, and the foot forces and the
Speaker 1: strange aids. Of these, four score thousand were hippo Gippians,
Speaker 1: and twenty thousand that rode upon lacinopters, which is a
Speaker 1: mighty great foul, and instead of feathers, covered thick over
Speaker 1: with warped leaves, but their wing feathers were much like
Speaker 1: the leaves of lettuces. After them were placed that ken
Speaker 1: Krabole lions and the Scoo Domacians. There came also to
Speaker 1: aid us with the bare star, thirty thousand solo Toxotans
Speaker 1: and fifty thousand and Amdromans. These Pasillo Toxotans ride upon
Speaker 1: great fleas, of which they have their denomination, for every
Speaker 1: flea among them is as big as a dozen elephants.
Speaker 1: The and Themadromans are footmen, yet flew in the air
Speaker 1: without feathers. In this manner every man had a large
Speaker 1: mantle reaching down to his foot, which the wind blowing
Speaker 1: against filled it like a sail, and they were carried
Speaker 1: along as if they had been boats. The most part
Speaker 1: of these in flight were targeteers. It was said also
Speaker 1: that there were expected from the stars over Cappadocia three
Speaker 1: score and ten thousand Struthoballenians, and five thousand and Hippo Granians.
Speaker 1: But I had no sight of them, for they were
Speaker 1: not yet come, and therefore I didn't write anything, though
Speaker 1: wonderful and incredible reports were given of them. This was
Speaker 1: the number of Endymion's army. The furniture was all alike.
Speaker 1: Their helmets of bean hulls, which are great with them
Speaker 1: and very strong. Their breathplates all of lupins cut into scales,
Speaker 1: for they take the shells of lupins, and fastening them together,
Speaker 1: make breastplates of them, which are impenetrable and as hard
Speaker 1: as any horn. Their shields and swords like two ours
Speaker 1: in Greece. And when the time of battle was come,
Speaker 1: they were ordered in this manner. The right wing was
Speaker 1: supplied by the Hippo Gippians, where the king himself was
Speaker 1: in person with the choicest soldiers in the army, among
Speaker 1: whom we also were arranged. The lacin opters made the
Speaker 1: left wing, and the aids were placed in the main battle.
Speaker 1: As every man's fortune fell, the foot, which in number
Speaker 1: were about six thousand myriads, were disposed of in this manner.
Speaker 1: There are many spiders in those parts of mighty bigness,
Speaker 1: everyone in quantity exceeding of the islands of the sick ladies.
Speaker 1: These were appointed to spin a web in the air
Speaker 1: between the moon and the morning Star, which was done
Speaker 1: in an instant, and made a plain bridge upon which
Speaker 1: the foot forces were planted, who had for their leader
Speaker 1: Nick Terion, the son of Eudenacs, and two other associates.
Speaker 1: But of the enemy's side, the left wing consisted of
Speaker 1: the Hippomrmicks, and among them faith on himself. These are
Speaker 1: beasts of huge bigness and winged, carrying the resemblance of
Speaker 1: our emmets, but for their greatness. For those of the
Speaker 1: largest size were of the quantity of two acres. And
Speaker 1: not only the riders supplied the place of soldiers, but
Speaker 1: they also did much mischief with their horns. They were
Speaker 1: a number fifty thousand. In the right wing were ranged
Speaker 1: the Aracnops, of which there were about fifty thousand, all
Speaker 1: archers riding upon great gnats. Then followed the aero Kardakis,
Speaker 1: who were light armed and footmen, but good soldiers, casting
Speaker 1: out slings afar off huge great turnips, and whosoever was
Speaker 1: hit with them lived not long after, but died with
Speaker 1: the stink that proceeded from their wounds. It is said
Speaker 1: they used to anoint their bullets with the poison of mallows.
Speaker 1: After them were placed the Calomikates, men at arms and
Speaker 1: good at handstrokes, in number about fifty thousand. They are
Speaker 1: called carlomcats because their shields were made of mushrooms, and
Speaker 1: their spears of the stalks of the herb asparagus. Near
Speaker 1: unto them were placed the Kino Ballenians that were sent
Speaker 1: from the dog Star to aid him. These were men
Speaker 1: with dogs faces right upon winged acorns. But the slingers
Speaker 1: that should have come out of Via Lactea and the
Speaker 1: Nepheli centaurs came too short of these aids, for the
Speaker 1: battle was done before their arrival, so that they did
Speaker 1: them no good. And indeed the slingers came not at all.
Speaker 1: Wherefore they say faithOn in displeasure overran their country. These
Speaker 1: were all the forces that Fithon brought into the field.
Speaker 1: And when they were joined in battle, after the signal
Speaker 1: was given, and when the asses on either side had brayed,
Speaker 1: for these are to them instead of trumpets, the fight began,
Speaker 1: and the left wing of the Heliotans or sun soldiers
Speaker 1: fled presently and would not abide to receive the charge
Speaker 1: of the Hippogypians, but turned their backs immediately, and many
Speaker 1: were put to the sword. But the right wing of
Speaker 1: theirs were too hard by our left wing, and drove
Speaker 1: them back till they came to our footmen, who joining
Speaker 1: with them aid the enemies. There also turned their backs
Speaker 1: and fly, especially when they found their own left wing
Speaker 1: to be overthrown. Thus were they wholly discomfited on all hands.
Speaker 1: Many were taken prisoners, and many slain. Much blood was spilt.
Speaker 1: Some fell upon the clouds, which made them look of
Speaker 1: a red color, as sometimes they appeared to us about sunsetting.
Speaker 1: Some dropped upon the earth, which made me suppose it
Speaker 1: was upon some such occasion that Homer thought Jupiter reigned
Speaker 1: blood for the death of his son Sarpedon returning from
Speaker 1: the pursuit, we erected two trophies, one for the fight
Speaker 1: on foot, which we placed upon the spiders webs, the
Speaker 1: other for the fight in the air, which we set
Speaker 1: upon the clouds. As soon as this was done, news
Speaker 1: came to us by our scouts that the nefelace centaurs
Speaker 1: were coming on, which indeed should have come to Fithon
Speaker 1: before the fight. And when they drew so near unto
Speaker 1: us that we could take full view of them, it
Speaker 1: was a strange sight to behold such monsters composed of
Speaker 1: flying horses and men. That part which resembled mankind, which
Speaker 1: was from the waist upwards, did equal in greatness the
Speaker 1: Rhodian colossus. And that which was like a horse was
Speaker 1: as big as a great ship of burden, and of
Speaker 1: such a multitude, that I was fearful to set down
Speaker 1: their number, lest it might be taken for a lie.
Speaker 1: And for their leader, they had the Sagittarius out of
Speaker 1: the zodiac. When they heard that their friends were foiled,
Speaker 1: they sent a messenger to faith On to renew the fight.
Speaker 1: Whereupon they set themselves in array and fell upon the
Speaker 1: Sealinitans or the moon soldiers, that were troubled and disordered
Speaker 1: into following the chase, and scattered in gathering the spoils,
Speaker 1: and put them all in flight, and pursued the king
Speaker 1: into his city, and killed the greatest part of his birds,
Speaker 1: overturned the trophies he had set up, and overcame the
Speaker 1: whole country that was on by the spiders. Myself and
Speaker 1: two other companions were taken alive. When fith On himself
Speaker 1: was come, they set up other trophies in token of victory,
Speaker 1: And on the morrow we were carried prisoners into the sun,
Speaker 1: our arms bound behind us with a piece of the cobweb.
Speaker 1: Yet would they, by no means lay any siege to
Speaker 1: the city, but returned and built up a wall in
Speaker 1: the midst of the air to keep the light of
Speaker 1: the sun from falling upon the moon. And they made
Speaker 1: it a double wall, holy compact of clouds, so that
Speaker 1: a manifest eclipse of the moon ensued, and all things
Speaker 1: detained in perpetual night. Wherewith and Dimion was so much
Speaker 1: oppressed that he sent ambassadors to intreat the demolishing of
Speaker 1: the building, and beseech him that he would not damn
Speaker 1: them to live in darkness, promising to pay him tribute,
Speaker 1: to be his rand an associate, and never after to
Speaker 1: stir against him. Fithon's counsel twice assembled to consider upon
Speaker 1: this offer, and in their first meeting would remit nothing
Speaker 1: of their conceived displeasure. But on the morrow they altered
Speaker 1: their minds to these terms. The Heliotans and their colleagues
Speaker 1: have made a peace with the selinutnds and their associates
Speaker 1: upon these conditions, that the Heliotans shall cast down the
Speaker 1: wall and deliver the prisoners that they have taken upon
Speaker 1: a ratable ransom. And that the Selinutans should leave the
Speaker 1: other stars at liberty, and raise no war against the Heliotans,
Speaker 1: but aid and assist one another if either of them
Speaker 1: should be invaded. That the King of the Selinutans should
Speaker 1: yearly pay to the King of Heliotans in way of
Speaker 1: tribute ten thousand vessels of dew, and deliver ten thousand
Speaker 1: of their people to be pledges for their fidelity. That
Speaker 1: the colony to be sent to the morning Stars should
Speaker 1: be jointly so applied by them both, and liberty given
Speaker 1: to any else that would be the sharers in it.
Speaker 1: That these articles of peace should be engraven in a
Speaker 1: pillar of amber, to be erected in the midst of
Speaker 1: the air upon the confines of their country for the performance,
Speaker 1: whereof were sworn the Heliutans Pyronides and Theretes and Phlogius,
Speaker 1: and of the selina Tans Nike Tor and Manius and
Speaker 1: Polly Lamps. Thus was the peace concluded, the wall immediately demolished,
Speaker 1: and we there were prisoners delivered being returned into the moon.
Speaker 1: They came forth to meet us and Dimmion himself and
Speaker 1: all his friends, who embraced us with tears, and desired
Speaker 1: us to make our abode with him, and to be
Speaker 1: partners in the colony, promising to give me his own
Speaker 1: son in marriage, for there are no women amongst them,
Speaker 1: which I by no means would yield unto, but desired
Speaker 1: of all loves to be dismissed again into this see.
Speaker 1: And he, finding it impossible to persuade us to his purpose,
Speaker 1: after seven days feasting, gave us leave to depart. Now,
Speaker 1: what strange novelty is worthy of note I observed during
Speaker 1: the time of my abode there I will relate unto you.
Speaker 1: The first is that they are not forgotten of women,
Speaker 1: but of mankind, for they have no other marriage but
Speaker 1: of males. The name of women is utterly unknown among them.
Speaker 1: Until they accomplish the age of five and twenty years,
Speaker 1: they are given in marriage to others. From that time
Speaker 1: forwards they take others in marriage to themselves. For as
Speaker 1: soon as the infant is conceived, the leg begins to swell,
Speaker 1: and afterwards, when the time of birth is come, they
Speaker 1: give it a lance and take it out dead. Then
Speaker 1: they lay it abroad with open mouth toward the wind,
Speaker 1: and so it takes life. And I think they are
Speaker 1: of the Grecians. Call it the belly of the leg,
Speaker 1: because therein they bear their children instead of a belly.
Speaker 1: I will tell you now a thing more strange than this.
Speaker 1: There are a kind of men among them, called the Dendritans,
Speaker 1: which are begotten in this manner. They cut out the
Speaker 1: right stone of a man's cod and set it in
Speaker 1: the ground, from which springeth up a great tree of flesh,
Speaker 1: with branches and leaves, bearing a kind of fruit, much
Speaker 1: like to an acorn, but of a cubit in length,
Speaker 1: which they gather when they are ripe, and cut men
Speaker 1: out of them. Their privy members are to be set
Speaker 1: on and taken off as they have occasion. Rich men
Speaker 1: have them made of ivory, poor men of wood, wherewith
Speaker 1: they perform the active generation and accompany their spouses. When
Speaker 1: a man has come to his full age, he dies not,
Speaker 1: but is dissolved like smoke, and is turned into air.
Speaker 1: One kind of food is common to them all for
Speaker 1: they kindle a fire and broil frogs upon the coals,
Speaker 1: which are with them in infinite numbers, flying in the air.
Speaker 1: And whilst they're boiling, they sit round about them, as
Speaker 1: if it were about a table, and lap up the
Speaker 1: smoke that rises from them, and feast themselves therewith. And
Speaker 1: this is all they're feeding. For their drink. They have
Speaker 1: air beaten into a mortar, which yields a kind of moisture.
Speaker 1: Much it like unto do they have no avoidance of excrements,
Speaker 1: either of urine or dung. Neither have they any issue
Speaker 1: for that purpose, like unto us. Their boys admit copulation,
Speaker 1: but not like unto ours, but in their hams a
Speaker 1: little above the calf of the leg, for they are open,
Speaker 1: for there they are open. They hold it a great
Speaker 1: ornament to be bald, for hairy persons are abhorred with them.
Speaker 1: And yet among the stars that are vomits. It is
Speaker 1: thought commendable, as some that have traveled those coasts reported
Speaker 1: unto us, such beards as they have are growing a
Speaker 1: little above their knees. They have no nails on their feet,
Speaker 1: for their whole foot is all but one toe. Every
Speaker 1: one of them is at the point of his rump
Speaker 1: hath a long coal work growing out instead of a tail,
Speaker 1: always green and flourishing, which though a man fall upon
Speaker 1: his back, cannot be broken. The droppings of their noses
Speaker 1: is more sweet than honey. When they labor or exercise themselves,
Speaker 1: they anoint their body with milk, whereinto if a little
Speaker 1: of that honey chance to drop, it will be turned
Speaker 1: into cheese. They make very fat oil of their beans,
Speaker 1: and of a delicate as saver as any sweet ointment.
Speaker 1: They have many vines in those parts, which yield but water.
Speaker 1: For the grapes that hang upon the clusters are like
Speaker 1: our hailstones. And I verily think that when the wines
Speaker 1: there are shaken with a strong wind, there falls a
Speaker 1: storm of hail among amongst us. By the breaking down
Speaker 1: of those kinds of berries, their bellies stand them instead
Speaker 1: of satchels to put in their necessities, which they may
Speaker 1: open and shut at their pleasure. For they have neither
Speaker 1: liver nor any kind of entrails. Only they are rough
Speaker 1: and hairy within, so that when their young children are cold,
Speaker 1: they may be enclosed therein to keep them warm. The
Speaker 1: rich men have garments of glass, very soft and delicate,
Speaker 1: the poorer sort of brass woven, whereof they have great plenty,
Speaker 1: which they en scene with water to make it fit
Speaker 1: for the workmen, as we do our wool. If I
Speaker 1: should write what manner of eyes they have, I doubt
Speaker 1: I should be taken for a liar, and publishing a
Speaker 1: matter so incredible I cannot choose but tell it. For
Speaker 1: they have is to take in and out as please themselves.
Speaker 1: And when a man is so disposed, he may take
Speaker 1: them out and lay them by till he has occasion
Speaker 1: to use them, and then put them in and see again. Many,
Speaker 1: when they have lost their own eyes, borrow of others,
Speaker 1: for their rich have many lying by them. Their ears
Speaker 1: are all made of the leaves of plane trees, excepting
Speaker 1: those that come of acorns, for they only have them
Speaker 1: made of wood. I saw also another strange thing in
Speaker 1: the same court, a mighty great glass lying upon the
Speaker 1: top of a pit of no grape depth, whereinto if
Speaker 1: any man descend, he shall hear everything that is spoken
Speaker 1: upon the earth. If he but look into the glass,
Speaker 1: he shall see all cities and all nations, as well
Speaker 1: as if he were among them. There had I the
Speaker 1: sight of all my friends and the whole country. About
Speaker 1: whether they saw me or not, I cannot tell. But
Speaker 1: if they believe it not to be, so let them
Speaker 1: take the pains to go there themselves, and they shall
Speaker 1: find my words true. Oh my gods, oh my gods.
Speaker 1: Can you believe this was written in the second century CE?
Speaker 1: Like this ship is wild? It's ridiculous. I knew it
Speaker 1: was going to be, and yet my mind has still
Speaker 1: been blown huge Thanks to Ryan Denson, a recent guest
Speaker 1: on the podcast I forget when the episode of scheduled
Speaker 1: to come out? Maybe an upcoming guest or very recent.
Speaker 1: Hard to say, but thank you to Ryan for suggesting this,
Speaker 1: because game changer. Where did Lucian come up with this stuff? People?
Speaker 1: I mean, are they people? Moon people? Sun people? They're
Speaker 1: riding flying acorns. There was a river of wine. If
Speaker 1: you don't think that sold me immediately, you don't know
Speaker 1: me well enough. This work is so much fun to read.
Speaker 1: I mean, I say this all the time because it's
Speaker 1: all fun, But like funk, if this one isn't something
Speaker 1: else entirely, I cannot wait for next episode. I mean,
Speaker 1: I've only read a third of this book and we've
Speaker 1: already had rivers of wine tree women who meld two
Speaker 1: men they fuck and then keep them like that forever.
Speaker 1: A trip to the Moon where all the absolutely most
Speaker 1: bananas ship goes down, you know, just a war between
Speaker 1: the Sun and the Moon. No big. Also those names,
Speaker 1: so Fithon obviously right is the sun of Helios who
Speaker 1: sucks shut up, and Dimion is the lover of Selene,
Speaker 1: the moon goddess. Like these are so good, totally normal
Speaker 1: staff for the second century. I'm living for it cannot wait,
Speaker 1: just assuming you're all going to feel the same way,
Speaker 1: because literally, how could you not. This man is intentionally
Speaker 1: making up the silliest, most ridiculous stuff that he could imagine,
Speaker 1: specifically to make fun of historiographers and mythographers of his
Speaker 1: time and earlier, and specifically, like you said at the beginning,
Speaker 1: truly just a spite Homer for making the Odyssey so
Speaker 1: fucked up. Let's talk about mis Baby is written and
Speaker 1: produced by me Live Albert Michaelis. Smith handles so many
Speaker 1: incredible and wonderful things, including promotional material my YouTube research.
Speaker 1: The podcast is hosted and monetized by the fine non
Speaker 1: Moon people at a cast. I am live and I
Speaker 1: love ancient authors so much. They could be so weird
Speaker 1: and wonderful. I love this ship. M