Speaker 1: So this is embarrassing. Had to show my husband that
Speaker 1: we had a podcast yesterday and how to download it. So, Michael, honey,
Speaker 1: if you're listening, welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2: It's time.
Speaker 1: Oh and don't forget to follow the podcast too. All right,
Speaker 1: the show starts now.
Speaker 3: It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And wherever you are,
Speaker 3: if you're driving at home or still stuck in the
Speaker 3: ballpit of chucky cheese from last night, raise your glass
Speaker 3: because we're about to salute our brand new hero of
Speaker 3: the week. Today's hero is a thirty nine year old
Speaker 3: woman named Crystal Gable from Colorado who just found out
Speaker 3: some shocking news. She learned that somehow she is running
Speaker 3: for president of the United States, and she is not
Speaker 3: happy about it.
Speaker 1: I mean, honestly, it's a job nobody wants. I don't
Speaker 1: blame you, Kristal.
Speaker 3: She didn't plan to run, doesn't want to run. But
Speaker 3: as a hero, sometimes people just recognize your greatness work.
Speaker 1: We can I just ask like, how is this working?
Speaker 3: Yeah, She's gonna be on the ballot for Minnesota's upcoming primary,
Speaker 3: running as the candidate for the Legalized Marijuana Now Party.
Speaker 1: And I thought you said she was at cole.
Speaker 3: How did this even happen? Crystal used to be in
Speaker 3: a Facebook group for legalizing the green stuff. It's just
Speaker 3: like jose might randomly sign up for like a cat's
Speaker 3: Wearing Hats Facebook group. Oh that looks kind of fun, awesome.
Speaker 4: Jgitimately following cats wearing hats on Instagram?
Speaker 5: Okay, not kidding, following.
Speaker 1: But she's in Colorado, so basically she's just on Facebook, you.
Speaker 6: Know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Who is that group?
Speaker 3: But someone in Minnesota just randomly selected one of the
Speaker 3: profiles from that group to nominate for president and it
Speaker 3: just happened to be hers. She only found out about
Speaker 3: it because she has a Google alert set up for
Speaker 3: her own name, and it popped up in the upcoming
Speaker 3: Minnesota primary. Wow, it's too late to have it removed.
Speaker 3: So she's actively going around telling p well, please do
Speaker 3: not vote for me.
Speaker 1: Okay, and I know.
Speaker 3: That's exactly what a hero would say.
Speaker 1: Don't you think if all the candidates use reverse psychology
Speaker 1: it may work better?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Really tell us why you suck.
Speaker 3: Unfortunately for her, the story has gotten so popular. There's
Speaker 3: more people than ever saying they're going to vote for her,
Speaker 3: and they think there's a chance she might actually beat
Speaker 3: the other two big name candidates on the ballots, a
Speaker 3: chance for that. Crystal's response, she just rolls her eyes
Speaker 3: and said, I never should have joined the dumb Facebook group.
Speaker 3: That's why she is our hero of the week. And
Speaker 3: now it's on to our shock collar question of the
Speaker 3: day with our hero of the Minute, Digital Jake. He's
Speaker 3: my personal minute man. Take it away, Jake, very nice,
Speaker 3: You're welcome.
Speaker 8: Looking around the room at these tired Warren faces, all
Speaker 8: I can think of is two things. One, somebody here
Speaker 8: needs a die job. Second, I know.
Speaker 1: I'm getting my hair done tonight. It's why I'm wearing
Speaker 1: a hat.
Speaker 4: It's funny because I try to look at a Lexis
Speaker 4: J's pointed out brother.
Speaker 8: And Two everyone here needs a vacation because she doesn't
Speaker 8: love a nice relaxing getaway. Instead of asking you where
Speaker 8: you want to go, I'm asking you what did you
Speaker 8: forget to bring to bring all and Brooke, No, even
Speaker 8: though you forgot your husband on your last four trips,
Speaker 8: he's not one through twenty on this list to the Day, Family,
Speaker 8: you'll be naming the top twenty most forgotten items to
Speaker 8: pack when you go on a vacation in a special
Speaker 8: travel edition of.
Speaker 9: Man plenty of twenty.
Speaker 8: And as always, if you hear this sound, that means
Speaker 8: you guess the number one most common item people forgot,
Speaker 8: and you get immunity for one wrong answer. Let's start
Speaker 8: with the man who's forgotten to check his email every
Speaker 8: day since twenty twelve.
Speaker 3: Jeffrey Year First, Okay, I want to say extra thick
Speaker 3: vibrating selfie stick, but I know those aren't as popular
Speaker 3: as they used to.
Speaker 1: I mean, is that why you don't have a carry on.
Speaker 3: I've been searched and you're vibrating many times. But I'm
Speaker 3: just gonna go with a different phone accessory cell phone chargers.
Speaker 8: Yeah, charger number three on my travel adapter as well
Speaker 8: if you're going overseas.
Speaker 3: Okay, all those stuff, So that.
Speaker 9: Was number three on the list. Let's go to Jose.
Speaker 4: Hmmm, well, I think the most basic thing you could
Speaker 4: forget is a piece of luggage.
Speaker 1: What like a whole piece?
Speaker 9: Yeah, absolutely, you travel.
Speaker 3: The whole bag, you forgot it.
Speaker 4: Well, just like anything, guys, you leave the house, you're like,
Speaker 4: oh my walls at home, Oh, I forgot to put
Speaker 4: the luggage in.
Speaker 3: Let's go with that.
Speaker 9: Yeah, luggage is not in the top twenty.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, I forgot my clothes now.
Speaker 5: Three baggage, you never forgot one of them.
Speaker 3: No, I want to travel with you though, Yeah, you travel.
Speaker 1: He like he shows up?
Speaker 3: Yeah, imagine.
Speaker 9: Next up is Brook.
Speaker 1: Okay, I am definitely gonna go with a gimme, which
Speaker 1: is your toothbrush?
Speaker 9: Toothbrush?
Speaker 8: Toothpaste is the number one most forgotten item people forget
Speaker 8: to pack on vacation. Let's go over to Alexis.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go with It's the hardest if you forget
Speaker 2: it to buy a new one, personally a bathing suit.
Speaker 1: God, isn't it the worst? So annoying bathing.
Speaker 9: Suit did not make the top twenty.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry my list to my list.
Speaker 9: Yeah, no bathing suit here at all. Let's go over
Speaker 9: back to Jeffrey.
Speaker 3: I know what I forget to bring on vacations, but
Speaker 3: I'm not sure if it's on everybody's list though. Disguises, bigs,
Speaker 3: fake mustaches, and prosthetics. You know, you never know when
Speaker 3: you're gonna need that stuff. And I'm gonna go with
Speaker 3: something a little more basic, like shaving equipment.
Speaker 8: Oh okay, yeah, shaving equipment number thirteen. I'll give you
Speaker 8: razors for that one.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, okay, back to Brook. I think that sometimes
Speaker 1: because you're just packing all the outfits that you want,
Speaker 1: and sometimes you'll forget underwear.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, you never forgot underwears.
Speaker 5: Not like I bring.
Speaker 1: A bunch, but I've forgotten underwear and socks to pack
Speaker 1: them underwear.
Speaker 9: I did not make the top twenty.
Speaker 1: I was almost gonna guess glasses.
Speaker 3: Are you saved though? Do you have the silver saved?
Speaker 10: Oh?
Speaker 9: Yeah, well Brook does have the silver. Brook has a
Speaker 9: silver saved, so she saves.
Speaker 3: He forgot to pack the silver save in her bag. Okay,
Speaker 3: uh so back to me, Well, nothing is worse than
Speaker 3: getting on a plane and reaching in your bag for
Speaker 3: your extra strength prescription relaxation drugs and not finding them
Speaker 3: in there. So now you're stuck with your thoughts alone
Speaker 3: in a metal tube up in the sky. Give me xanax.
Speaker 3: You forgot your xanx.
Speaker 1: That's so specific medication.
Speaker 9: Not in the top Sorry, that's not in the top twenty.
Speaker 1: Brook.
Speaker 8: That means you've won today's plenty of Wow, underwhelming a
Speaker 8: lot of answers on the list. Let me tell you
Speaker 8: what you guys missed a hair brush was number two.
Speaker 1: I don't really pack that.
Speaker 9: First aid kit number four hair dryer.
Speaker 8: Or curly iron is the word for it. Umbrella was six,
Speaker 8: books and games was seven. Snacks was eight usable water bottle,
Speaker 8: contact solution, makeup remover, shampoo conditioner, body wash, bottle, opener, sunscreen,
Speaker 8: bug spray.
Speaker 6: Wow.
Speaker 3: All right, I guess we're Are we good at packing
Speaker 3: for trips or are we terrible at packing? I can't tell.
Speaker 1: Apparently nobody else forgets their underwears.
Speaker 3: We all got, so Brooke comes out on top of
Speaker 3: the travel lists. Thanks, and you get to choose who
Speaker 3: get shocked today. Someone's gonna be singing anti Hero by
Speaker 3: Taylor Swift.
Speaker 1: I remember last time I traveled with you, Jeff, we
Speaker 1: went to New York and you didn't own a carry
Speaker 1: on suitcase. So I am going to shock you finally.
Speaker 3: For that wow wow, like our full.
Speaker 1: Suitcase for one night and we had to go and
Speaker 1: check it and use the.
Speaker 3: Shamed for the type of book that I bring onto
Speaker 3: the plane only broke. All right, I'm gonna get shocked then,
Speaker 3: while singing anti Hero, here we go, it's me Hi
Speaker 3: on the problem, It's me tea, everybody deep in the.
Speaker 9: Throat, don't break it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's your shockolar question.
Speaker 7: Of the day, Brooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: It's Brook and Jeffrey in the morning. Brook came to
Speaker 3: me the other day and whispered under her breath, Hey,
Speaker 3: jeff do you think you could find a test to
Speaker 3: see how middle aged I am?
Speaker 11: No?
Speaker 3: Me being her fourth favorite work friend. I was like, sure,
Speaker 3: I'll find that for you. Let's do it on the Okay,
Speaker 3: you don't remember asking me that, Brook, Let's already point
Speaker 3: against you if you can't remember asking me these types
Speaker 3: of questions. So Broke, we don't have a lot of
Speaker 3: time here. We gotta go over these middle aged qualities.
Speaker 3: You just say yes or no. It just fits you.
Speaker 3: Maybe you're younger than you think. Oh my god, all right,
Speaker 3: let's go. Number one, you don't ever sleep past nine am.
Speaker 1: Well, because I have kids, juff.
Speaker 3: Number two, you've called a thirty year old an infantilizing
Speaker 3: name like sweetie or honey. Let's books go to to
Speaker 3: call everybody that's very middle age all the time. Number three,
Speaker 3: you write appointments down on paper, calendars or post it notes.
Speaker 1: I don't do that.
Speaker 3: You don't know where do you write?
Speaker 1: I put them in my calendar.
Speaker 3: Number four, you go into the bank to make a deposit.
Speaker 1: No, I also do that mobile on my phone.
Speaker 3: Really, Yeah, how do you explain all the free suckers
Speaker 3: that are you having? First when you're coming to work
Speaker 3: every day you're calling bs on that Brook those to
Speaker 3: the bank or she's the only one buying suckers at
Speaker 3: the story. Yeah, that's middle aged. The number five. Sometimes
Speaker 3: you can't find your glasses when they're sitting right on
Speaker 3: top of your head.
Speaker 1: No, because I can't take my glasses off, Jeff, I
Speaker 1: can't see like I've never put my glasses on my head.
Speaker 12: The fact that you.
Speaker 3: Can't see without your glasses.
Speaker 1: In case, it's third goal.
Speaker 3: According to the test that Brook, you are mega middle aged. Congratulations.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just trusted the judge.
Speaker 3: So, but here's the good news. You don't have to
Speaker 3: be middle aged to enjoy a brand new laser story
Speaker 3: that's coming up.
Speaker 1: I don't think I like it right out.
Speaker 3: It's the radio segment that sunk his entire life savings
Speaker 3: into a fun new product heleheartedly believes in, but after
Speaker 3: making sixty thousand of them, to sell. He realized inflatable
Speaker 3: dart boards. Oh, really only good for a one time years. Yeah,
Speaker 3: so make sure to buy him and packs of one hundred.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Back to the inflatable drawing board with laser stories, the
Speaker 3: segment where we read weird news stories around the globe,
Speaker 3: just like everyone else does, except we've got a laser.
Speaker 3: Those other bulls eye boneheads just don't. This first laser
Speaker 3: story is out of South Carolina. A couple named Joshua
Speaker 3: Harvey and Rosie Smith got into not one, but two
Speaker 3: high speed chases in a single day last week.
Speaker 1: Do you get away from the first one to be
Speaker 1: able to do the second one?
Speaker 3: I'll get into it here. And it's not even the
Speaker 3: most interesting part of the story because the first one
Speaker 3: happened around nine am on Monday.
Speaker 1: Oh it's an early morning thing because.
Speaker 3: A cop was trying to pull them over for expired
Speaker 3: tags and Joshua was driving their black Honda Sedan and
Speaker 3: managed to get away again. Put that on their next commercial,
Speaker 3: so you'd think that they'd lay low after that, But
Speaker 3: cut to two forty five that afternoon. Same day, they
Speaker 3: got into a second chase. This time Rosie was behind
Speaker 3: the wheel of a white Honda Sedan because it turned
Speaker 3: out they'd spent the entire day spray painting it to
Speaker 3: fool the.
Speaker 1: Car must have been so tired.
Speaker 3: And they're playing. Obviously didn't work because like Alexus's tanning appointment,
Speaker 3: it was a bad spray job. Yeah, and plus they
Speaker 3: kept the same license place.
Speaker 1: With the expired task. Yes, okay.
Speaker 3: The second chase ended with police disabling their car on
Speaker 3: the highway.
Speaker 1: You know that man is blaming it on the woman's
Speaker 1: driving though.
Speaker 3: But here's the fun part. When the sedan came to
Speaker 3: a complete stop, the couple opened their doors to make
Speaker 3: a run for it, and for some reason, a dog
Speaker 3: followed them, along with a cat and then four chickens.
Speaker 3: The car was the old McDonald's. Animal control dealt with
Speaker 3: the runaway livestock, and Josh and Rosie got taken to jail.
Speaker 1: It's like you could put chickens and a cat in
Speaker 1: the same car and everybody's cool. Everybody's copacetic.
Speaker 5: I hope they arrested them all too.
Speaker 3: The chickens had little handcuffs.
Speaker 7: On their.
Speaker 3: Cops called them the Bonnie and Clyde wannabes. Yeah, I
Speaker 3: still knock.
Speaker 1: Off, I do see them all in black and white
Speaker 1: striped outfits.
Speaker 3: This next laser story is out of Pizza Palace. Nothing
Speaker 3: worse than craving your favorite takeout food only to show
Speaker 3: up at the restaurant and see a sign on the
Speaker 3: door that they're temporarily closed.
Speaker 5: Man Or in my life, when I go to order
Speaker 5: delivery and it's the one.
Speaker 3: Day a week the fun place is closed.
Speaker 5: Yeah, such a hard line.
Speaker 1: Monday is your hard.
Speaker 3: Day, tesday. That's exactly what happened at a Pizza Hut branch. Oh,
Speaker 3: but what the sign said left wannabe customer is completely
Speaker 3: speechless because taped right on the front door, a white
Speaker 3: piece of paper read, sorry for the inconvenience, but due
Speaker 3: to unforeseen circumcisions, the dining room will be closed tonight.
Speaker 4: CIRCUMCISIONI oh god, unhappy hours.
Speaker 3: You already guess. The restaurant sign quickly went viral. There's
Speaker 3: a joke here about leaving a tip, but I'm too
Speaker 3: tired of.
Speaker 1: Work it out.
Speaker 3: Also, someone said, half expected to see incontinence instead of inconvenience,
Speaker 3: and I appreciate the help. Unforeseen circumcisions is the name
Speaker 3: of my new bands.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 3: People also started sharing their run ins with terrible typos,
Speaker 3: one said. A convenience store once posted a sign that
Speaker 3: read shoplifters will be prostituted.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'll do it on purpose the street see me
Speaker 1: take these snickers.
Speaker 3: This next Lazzer story is out of Valentine's Day headquarters. Yes,
Speaker 3: normally there isn't much overlap between wanting to send a
Speaker 3: significant other cookies and wanting to break up with them.
Speaker 3: But yeah, if you do fit into that category, you
Speaker 3: now have an option because Insomnia Cookies is offering a
Speaker 3: limited edition new twelve pack on their website called the
Speaker 3: It's Not Me, It's You Package, So you can choose
Speaker 3: a dozen cookies that you want to send to your
Speaker 3: soon to be X, and it'll include a handwritten breakup
Speaker 3: note on the inside of the box.
Speaker 1: Oh gosh. The soundest part is I probably would still
Speaker 1: eat them wall cry.
Speaker 3: It's nice to give them the gifts so that they
Speaker 3: can eat their feelings right afterwards. It's very considerate. You
Speaker 3: can't say anything too spicy, though, but there are four
Speaker 3: options they give you. It's not me, It's You. Oh,
Speaker 3: there's You're sweet but not my flavor.
Speaker 5: I like that one because its kind of funny. Like
Speaker 5: to laugh and then cry.
Speaker 3: There's I have the hots for your roommate, goes kind
Speaker 3: of hard and we're done. Have a nice life.
Speaker 9: Oh the direct one.
Speaker 1: God, you really hope that the other person did something
Speaker 1: real wrong in that relationship.
Speaker 2: The delivery driver dropping these off.
Speaker 1: Y, does he make eye contact? Yeah.
Speaker 3: Insomnia said in a press release that this is a
Speaker 3: quote very unseerious way of ending things, since warm cookies
Speaker 3: are better than a cold heart.
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't know.
Speaker 3: They're trying to make it sound sweet. The pack, if
Speaker 3: you're interested, starts at thirty dollars. Oh and Brook, Apparently
Speaker 3: there is a box of cookies waiting for you up
Speaker 3: at the front desk from your husband, So you check
Speaker 3: that out when you're down with laser straight.
Speaker 1: And listen to the message.
Speaker 3: This next laser story is out of the happiest place
Speaker 3: on Earth here Disney.
Speaker 1: Oh my bedroom.
Speaker 3: Oh wait, oh god? Not after the cookies.
Speaker 7: Oh.
Speaker 3: A TikToker named Matthew Abeles who has six hundred and
Speaker 3: forty five thousand followers less than our show, by the way,
Speaker 3: stepping up Matt Atbrooke and Jeffrey. We'll follow us on
Speaker 3: TikTok and make Matt feel super insecure. But he just
Speaker 3: found a ticket booklet from nineteen seventy eight for Walt
Speaker 3: Disney World that was just collecting dust.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it was booklet.
Speaker 3: It was originally purchased for eight dollars and did not
Speaker 3: have an expiration date on it.
Speaker 1: Is this like I think back in the day. I'm
Speaker 1: not positive. I think that you used to have to
Speaker 1: have tickets to pay for the rides.
Speaker 5: Like, oh, really, I've heard it.
Speaker 4: You know, I know because I watch a lot of
Speaker 4: Disney docks that the original tickets from the original years
Speaker 4: are super valuable.
Speaker 3: But because he's a TikToker and this is good content,
Speaker 3: he decided to fly out to Orlando to see if
Speaker 3: the tickets would still work.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, wait a minute, I thought he's.
Speaker 3: Gonna sell them. And when he went to the turnstile
Speaker 3: with his forty six year old ticket, the lady stamped
Speaker 3: void on it, gotcha value, and then she replaced it
Speaker 3: with a brand new pass good for the entire day.
Speaker 3: That's a long no one should be.
Speaker 5: That's awful.
Speaker 1: No, it's nineteen seventy eight. It's not an original ticket.
Speaker 7: I don't know here.
Speaker 1: No, I think that's a. So she went to Disney
Speaker 1: World for eight dollars, is what you're saying.
Speaker 3: They gave him a one day ticket, which today is
Speaker 3: worth one hundred and sixty four bucks.
Speaker 7: Wow.
Speaker 3: And afterwards Matt said, quote, I can't believe that this
Speaker 3: actually worked.
Speaker 1: Dude. I bet it's so much more joyous to experience
Speaker 1: Disney World when you only have to pay eight dollars.
Speaker 1: You know, It's like how food tastes better when you
Speaker 1: get it for free.
Speaker 2: The life seems so long.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it hasn't been three hour wait already.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's even better when you climb the fence to
Speaker 3: get in. Oh wow, okay, so exciting. Speaking of visiting
Speaker 3: the happiest place on Earth, how about we crowd fun
Speaker 3: this guide to send him to Disneyland someday because he's
Speaker 3: always wanted to see Cinderella's Glass Slipper up close in person.
Speaker 3: It's been a dream of this. That sound means laser
Speaker 3: stories come to an end for the day. We'll do
Speaker 3: it again, same time on.
Speaker 7: Wednesday, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: Standing out in the dating world is not easy. You
Speaker 3: gotta get kind of creative with it. Like on the
Speaker 3: dating apps, every guy post pictures of themselves hugging their dog.
Speaker 3: So why not be a little different and instead throw
Speaker 3: up a photo of you hugging your pet spider theo
Speaker 3: oh my god, I'm not a lot of guys doing
Speaker 3: that now.
Speaker 1: It's spiders eight arms, great huggers.
Speaker 3: Or at the bars, instead of offering to buy a
Speaker 3: round of drinks for that cute girl and all her friends,
Speaker 3: but maybe instead go up and offer to buy them
Speaker 3: all ubers home right now, everybody, get out of here.
Speaker 1: I was hoping you're gonna say around in nachos.
Speaker 3: I'm a gentleman. But another way to stand out from
Speaker 3: the rest is to leave a voicemail that's so weird,
Speaker 3: so out there. It makes you the talk of the
Speaker 3: entire town, and the ladies will remember you forever as
Speaker 3: the guy from a brand new Loser line. Not a
Speaker 3: lot of people are trying that to increase their dating life.
Speaker 3: It's coming up right after this, what's up with you?
Speaker 7: Is this the right number? It's a line good by, Just.
Speaker 3: Call me back if you haven't heard the Loser line before.
Speaker 3: It works like this. Let's say someone approaches you while
Speaker 3: you're out at the club and uses this charming pickup
Speaker 3: line on you. Hey, girl, you know I'm so rich.
Speaker 3: I'll make it Bruce Wayne on you get it like rain.
Speaker 3: But I said Wayne, because I'm Bruce Wayne. Wait, why
Speaker 3: am I giving way my secret identity? Oh crap, whatever
Speaker 3: you do? Was this the urge to go full joker
Speaker 3: on him and laugh like he ledger in his face? Instead,
Speaker 3: tell him that you would love to be his catwoman
Speaker 3: and prowl around with him somenight. And then that's when
Speaker 3: you hand him the digits to the bat phone. So
Speaker 3: hopefully he leaves an awkward voicemail that we can play
Speaker 3: on the air. Voicemails like this one.
Speaker 11: Next message, why.
Speaker 6: And hey, it's me.
Speaker 12: It's May You remember you met me a few months
Speaker 12: ago and you had told me it was your birthday and.
Speaker 13: I did not forgive it. So here I am wishing
Speaker 13: you a happy birthday.
Speaker 6: For he's a jolly goodfellow.
Speaker 14: For he's a jolly goodfellow.
Speaker 12: Or he's a jolly good fellow, which nobody can deny.
Speaker 12: Even though you didn't call me back, I still never
Speaker 12: forgot your birthday.
Speaker 13: And don't forget it.
Speaker 12: My birthday is in two months, two weeks, two days.
Speaker 6: Okay, yes, it's your birthday day.
Speaker 3: Is the real life happy birthday reminder from Facebook, fellow
Speaker 3: when you retired, though I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think it's just for old people in general. I'm
Speaker 1: just sad if that's the only birthday wish Brian got.
Speaker 6: Of the show.
Speaker 12: Clarly, what's going on is Zach from the other night.
Speaker 12: I feel like I was talking a lot about myself.
Speaker 12: You know, I got that overall athletic background. But don't
Speaker 12: get it wrong. I'm not just the typical jock, meathead
Speaker 12: athlete dummy. I do have a soft side to myself,
Speaker 12: especially when I'm at home and I'm in my comfort zone,
Speaker 12: and there's things that I like to do that I
Speaker 12: don't tell everybody. So one of those things is I
Speaker 12: like to dress up like Ariana Grande. I'm just throw
Speaker 12: on some glitter on my face, put my hair in
Speaker 12: the closest thing to a ponytailer that my hair can do,
Speaker 12: and laying on the bed, don't thank you next, thank
Speaker 12: you next. I feel like, in a non weird way,
Speaker 12: I can relate to her. Hey, don't don't get it twisted,
Speaker 12: all right, I am straight fully.
Speaker 1: All I want to do is buy this poor man
Speaker 1: a wig. I mean, you don't need to do your
Speaker 1: own ponytail. You think her hair is real? My friend? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 1: if you're good to do it, let's do it right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's go all out with it.
Speaker 1: Yes.
Speaker 3: Speaking of Ari, I want to tell all of our listeners,
Speaker 3: if you're on any other radio stations TikTok, I need
Speaker 3: you to say thank you next and go to Brook
Speaker 3: and Jeffrey in the morning, because we got song of
Speaker 3: the Week clips on their second date reactions, even the
Speaker 3: top loser line of the week that we post every
Speaker 3: single week. It's worth a look at least.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, that's great. It's kind of desperate at the end.
Speaker 3: There I got. All I know is I've got no
Speaker 3: more tears left to cry. So let's switch positions on
Speaker 3: everyone and go back to our clips. Hit it next message.
Speaker 14: Hello, I've been here for twenty minutes. You said Third
Speaker 14: and Vine, right, Well, I'm here on third and Vine
Speaker 14: and you're nowhere to be seen. I bought exactly what
Speaker 14: you said. I got the three Homesypot gift cards, two
Speaker 14: Jumba Juice smoothies, and a forty dollars gift card to
Speaker 14: Baja Friesh.
Speaker 12: What am I supposed to do with.
Speaker 14: All of this. I'm not going to eat the Baja
Speaker 14: Fresh and drink three smoothies by myself. What I'm here
Speaker 14: to buy a PS five Holcome Craigslist, What do you want?
Speaker 14: I'm just doing what I want to do. Keep moving,
Speaker 14: do your business. Oh my god, I'm never doing anything
Speaker 14: like this on Craigslist again. Think for wasting my time,
Speaker 14: parasite o.
Speaker 3: What she's standing in the middle of the road in
Speaker 3: the intersection blocking the cars? Is that why everybody was hawking?
Speaker 1: Really, she was in the car. You can't hold that
Speaker 1: many jamba juices and stand up. You just can't. Your
Speaker 1: hands would be so cold.
Speaker 3: Why wouldn't guy who ever gave her that loser line
Speaker 3: go there to at least claim all that free stuff,
Speaker 3: the free drinks, the gift cards.
Speaker 1: If they want you to pay them in gift cards,
Speaker 1: it's usually not a good deal.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Actually, well, I'll just say if you ever go on Craigslist,
Speaker 3: you should use it for the other thing that you
Speaker 3: go on there for, not forgetting PS five stuff. There's
Speaker 3: a lot better services you can find on process.
Speaker 1: Is that also in exchange for a whole segment?
Speaker 3: I'll show you that EPs of it afterward, Let's go
Speaker 3: the next clipt.
Speaker 15: Hey Jack, I'm not really sure what's going on with
Speaker 15: you right now. I've called you times and you're not refunding.
Speaker 15: I've been kind of just running that that night through
Speaker 15: my head, you know, and I don't know what I
Speaker 15: did wrong or what bothered you. I mean, I remember
Speaker 15: at that bar we were at, they had these like
Speaker 15: pineapple little coasters that I think I think I turned
Speaker 15: one upside down, and you might think that I was
Speaker 15: trying to tell.
Speaker 11: You that I was a swinger.
Speaker 15: But I'm not.
Speaker 7: I'm not.
Speaker 15: I'm really not. I mean, I've been invited to those
Speaker 15: parties before.
Speaker 11: But I've never been inside.
Speaker 15: Like I mean, I've been curious before, Like I've walked
Speaker 15: up to the building where there was a swinger party,
Speaker 15: but I never even you know, touched or knocked on
Speaker 15: the door, even like I just kind of I mean,
Speaker 15: I saw the shades were open, so I looked just
Speaker 15: out of curiosity.
Speaker 3: I feel like that message went another forty seconds to
Speaker 3: be like I mean, I was, I was with the couple,
Speaker 3: but I wasn't there with the eye contact, like it
Speaker 3: was a mirror, So technically it doesn't count.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that guy's the worst liar ever.
Speaker 5: Yeah, he's like, I have never had one partner by myself.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just be you.
Speaker 7: Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 3: You can listen to Lose online regularly at this time
Speaker 3: every week. You can make sure you subscribe to the
Speaker 3: Brook and Jeffery YouTube channel where you can listen to
Speaker 3: all of our Loser lines, second dates, and phone tabs.
Speaker 3: Right there, We're gonna do a brand new phone tap right.
Speaker 7: After this freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: When we look at society as a whole and we
Speaker 3: focus on the bad people that are part of it,
Speaker 3: you've basically got the thieves, the predators, and the people
Speaker 3: who leave their Christmas lights up into January.
Speaker 1: Beyond who they're okay, up until July.
Speaker 3: Can I not be ridiculous? Just admit you're a terrible
Speaker 3: person who likes giving the middle finger to all of
Speaker 3: your neighbors. That's why we call a lady today from
Speaker 3: the homeowners Association to let her know he has crossed
Speaker 3: the line of decency and decorum in our community and
Speaker 3: she must pay in your phone jack right now. Hello,
Speaker 3: Oh okay, you answered, so you're not on vacation for
Speaker 3: the last month. What this is?
Speaker 6: Emily yeah, yeah, I recognize the number.
Speaker 3: No, this is Paul from the homeowners Association. I don't
Speaker 3: think I know you.
Speaker 6: Okay, Hi, yeah, I.
Speaker 3: Was recently elected to the president.
Speaker 5: Okay.
Speaker 3: The reason for my call is, I'll try to be brief.
Speaker 3: You still have your Christmas lights up?
Speaker 6: I don't understand. What do you mean You.
Speaker 3: Don't understand you don't have them up.
Speaker 13: And I know I have them. Wait a minute, so
Speaker 13: you're calling from the h away to come point about
Speaker 13: the fact that my Christmas I threw up.
Speaker 3: I'm not complaining. I'm just stating the fact that you
Speaker 3: still have them up. Can we just agree on that part.
Speaker 13: I do not understand what this business is of yours
Speaker 13: if you're not complaining about them.
Speaker 6: Okay, why are we talking?
Speaker 3: Other neighbors have said that you would be difficult, so
Speaker 3: I'm seeing what they're Oh my god, Look, you realize
Speaker 3: that it's according to the bylaws, they should have been
Speaker 3: down weeks ago.
Speaker 13: Well, I'm not all that concerned about what rules.
Speaker 3: Sorry, I'm not even interested in your answer. I'm just
Speaker 3: here to tell you you've occurred fines of fifty dollars
Speaker 3: a day, so extrapolate that to today's date. You owe
Speaker 3: us thirteen hundred and fifty dollars.
Speaker 13: All right, I'm gonna have to get a lawyer around this.
Speaker 6: This is ridiculous.
Speaker 13: Lawyer Janet that called you.
Speaker 3: There's no need to bring the other neighbors into this.
Speaker 3: This isn't a dispute. You violated the bylaws.
Speaker 13: Then I could understand it like I had out on
Speaker 13: my sidewalk, which, by the way, Janet all the.
Speaker 3: Time, got it, got it. Can you just shut up
Speaker 3: for a second because all I need is the check.
Speaker 3: Excuse me, thirteen hundred and fifty dollars.
Speaker 13: I'm not doing that.
Speaker 3: This is actually making a little bit more sense because
Speaker 3: I went up and I saw your furniture through the
Speaker 3: window of your house, and it looks like you probably
Speaker 3: don't have the money to pay the fine. What the
Speaker 3: is that? What this is? Look through my windows just
Speaker 3: to make sure you were home.
Speaker 13: How did you get elected?
Speaker 10: Paul?
Speaker 3: Sure, we could talk about me being the president of
Speaker 3: the HOA, but we can both agree that your furniture
Speaker 3: looks a little worn, oh like you got it for
Speaker 3: free off Craigslist.
Speaker 13: How dare you criticized Mike furniture?
Speaker 3: What I'm just being honest. I didn't even mention how
Speaker 3: I feel about your car.
Speaker 13: Yes, let's talk about my car. It's a Toyota. You've
Speaker 13: got something against Toyota.
Speaker 3: Exactly in this neighborhood.
Speaker 13: Oh oh my god.
Speaker 3: Look, I don't know if you've noticed, there's mostly rivions
Speaker 3: and Tesla's on your block. So if you could just
Speaker 3: go park your trash heap in a different neighborhood, then
Speaker 3: you can uber back over here. We would really appreciate that.
Speaker 13: There is no same way that this is real.
Speaker 6: This has to be a joke.
Speaker 13: There's no way that somebody in charge would actually talk
Speaker 13: like this.
Speaker 3: Okay, As I said before, I just got elected and
Speaker 3: I planned to rule this neighborhood with an iron fist.
Speaker 3: And if you don't feel like paying, there is a
Speaker 3: clause in your agreement that allows us to legally airbn
Speaker 3: be your home in order to make up for the losses.
Speaker 1: That is legal.
Speaker 3: It just relax, it's just on weekends.
Speaker 13: What clearly, I'm going to live in my house on
Speaker 13: the weekends.
Speaker 3: And no, no, no, no no. So you're you're gonna
Speaker 3: live out in your piece of car in your driveway
Speaker 3: and then we'll here's some guests come and stay inside
Speaker 3: your house.
Speaker 14: You are not going to air.
Speaker 13: Be and be in my house for whatever this bull
Speaker 13: fine you made up is that is not happening.
Speaker 3: I mean we're gonna try. We'd be lucky to find
Speaker 3: anybody that's willing to stay in that place.
Speaker 13: But your insult and this tonn of sending attitude.
Speaker 6: You need to tell me about your life and your house.
Speaker 13: That you in your car, and your ugly kids and
Speaker 13: you're horrible white.
Speaker 11: What what the hell do you get off?
Speaker 3: Did people tell you about my kids?
Speaker 13: The manipulative? Stop it, Paul, I know what you're doing.
Speaker 6: Stop it.
Speaker 3: I mean, I know my kids were voted in the
Speaker 3: neighborhood as second ugliest children out of any of the houses.
Speaker 6: But there is no.
Speaker 3: Children. Fine, I guess if we're admitting I made up
Speaker 3: something to excuse me thanks to your husband Eric.
Speaker 12: What.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was his idea to prank you, because my
Speaker 3: real name is jeff from brook and Jeffrey in the morning,
Speaker 3: we're doing a phone tap on you.
Speaker 12: My god, oh my god, you are Yeah.
Speaker 3: I'm serious. Eric said that you guys have been keeping
Speaker 3: your lights up forever and you haven't been wanting to
Speaker 3: take him down. He thought maybe this could convince you.
Speaker 10: Oh my god, I'm going to get him.
Speaker 8: Oh my god, I'm really sorry.
Speaker 10: Sorry, I yelled at you so much.
Speaker 3: You're gonna get him, and you're gonna get a new
Speaker 3: couch so that it's not such an ico.
Speaker 6: I think right now, you made me so mad.
Speaker 3: I made you mad. You called my kids hideous?
Speaker 8: Started it.
Speaker 3: Okay, let's just call it even cool, all right?
Speaker 7: Every morning was Wednesday Morning, twenties brooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: According to studies, about one in four people have been
Speaker 3: ghosted after a first date.
Speaker 1: That's a lot, dude.
Speaker 15: Yeah, And if.
Speaker 3: You're already not getting a second date or even a
Speaker 3: response from that person, what's the harm in sending a
Speaker 3: mildly threatening, pretty funny but underlying sense of danger and
Speaker 3: threatening joke text just like once? Like, what's the harm
Speaker 3: in that?
Speaker 1: I'm worried because I think he was threatening twice.
Speaker 3: To make sure it was clear, because one of our
Speaker 3: listeners did that, just trying to get the woman to
Speaker 3: say anything back.
Speaker 1: To him, like like I'm calling the cops.
Speaker 3: Well, did he cross the line on a scale of
Speaker 3: one to ten? I really don't believe in scales. And
Speaker 3: you shouldn't either when you hear the one line that
Speaker 3: he sent as a joke, and we're just minutes away
Speaker 3: from it coming up in your second date update right
Speaker 3: after this second date update. If you're getting ghosted by
Speaker 3: a girl, guys are kind of in a tough spot
Speaker 3: because you want to be respectful to them but also
Speaker 3: show some initiative to let them know that you're interested.
Speaker 1: Right, it's a fine line for sure.
Speaker 3: At least till they filed the restraining her. I mean,
Speaker 3: how lice is she going to know that you're inner her?
Speaker 1: It's an obvious line. I can't restrain you.
Speaker 3: One of our listeners, John, wasn't getting a text back
Speaker 3: after his date, so he got creative with how to
Speaker 3: get her response, and he's on the phone with us
Speaker 3: right now. So John, why don't you just give us
Speaker 3: the text that you sent to this girl. I want
Speaker 3: to hear only the text.
Speaker 1: Wait, this is the text he got ghosted from.
Speaker 3: No, the last text that you sent to get creative
Speaker 3: to get a response back. What what did you send her?
Speaker 1: I'm sorry you're set up. Made me think that he
Speaker 1: was going to be outside in a bush somewhere, hiding
Speaker 1: outside of her house.
Speaker 15: I see you?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Okay, sorry, what was your last text?
Speaker 11: Yeah? I said, I've noticed you're not responding. Do you
Speaker 11: want to see your family again? You will text me back.
Speaker 1: You're joking or.
Speaker 5: Tell me you had been joking back and forth the
Speaker 5: whole time?
Speaker 1: Had you already joked about a missing fair?
Speaker 3: I personally hope he's serious with it, and that would
Speaker 3: show how interested he truly was.
Speaker 11: Well, my grocery bills have gone up since our family's
Speaker 11: been in my apartment.
Speaker 5: But but what real kidnapper?
Speaker 9: We're not using this?
Speaker 1: Was it already an inside joke between you two?
Speaker 9: That's a good question.
Speaker 11: Uh, not exactly?
Speaker 1: Are you not at a police station?
Speaker 15: Right?
Speaker 3: I woulds Okay, Maybe was wrong for us to start
Speaker 3: at the very end of the story. Let's go back
Speaker 3: to the beginning, and maybe it makes sense.
Speaker 1: When the family still where they're supposed to be.
Speaker 3: Let's start with how you met this girl? What's her name?
Speaker 3: By the way?
Speaker 1: Okay, how'd you meet?
Speaker 11: We were on a dating app? Not too unique.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you told her nothing too special about you. I
Speaker 3: guess we should go out.
Speaker 1: I mean you sound funny, like, how did you strike
Speaker 1: up a conversation with her on Tinder?
Speaker 10: Uh, you know what.
Speaker 11: She had a picture of her skydiving, so I had
Speaker 11: done that in the past.
Speaker 5: That's so relatable. Anytime I've ever met someone of that
Speaker 5: skydives and then they meet somebody else.
Speaker 9: I'm like, oh, yeah, it was your jump.
Speaker 3: It was your jump.
Speaker 5: How many hours have you clocked?
Speaker 3: Really romantically and I I would never do that. You
Speaker 3: do skydive all the time in your Fortnite video game
Speaker 3: out of the plane to dive in.
Speaker 5: This is different when you jump from the bus.
Speaker 3: But I closed my eyes. Still, we all have our interests.
Speaker 3: You bonded with CC over that. What'd you guys do
Speaker 3: for your date?
Speaker 11: We just went off for drinks. I really wanted to
Speaker 11: get to know her, so I went to a quiet
Speaker 11: spot where I could talk to her a little bit and.
Speaker 3: Find out about her family and where what their schedule is. Okay,
Speaker 3: how did drinks go?
Speaker 11: I mean it went well. Eventually she needs to go
Speaker 11: get a phone charger, but the phone's about to die,
Speaker 11: so I took her to get the charger.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I bought one.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, yeah, totally. And what's nice about that is
Speaker 1: you extend the date, right, Plus you're a hero.
Speaker 11: Yeah yeah, and sort of what happens. She went to
Speaker 11: go to the drug start and was like sort of
Speaker 11: close to my place. So I was like, while we're here,
Speaker 11: do you just want to check out my spot?
Speaker 3: And she agreed, So she agreed.
Speaker 11: Okay, yeah, I was driving, so I drove to the
Speaker 11: closest one by my house.
Speaker 1: You know, I know exactly where to get a charger.
Speaker 3: It's weird. I have outlets in my home. Strange coincidence. Okay,
Speaker 3: so she went back with you, Yeah she did?
Speaker 15: What was that like?
Speaker 11: So she came over my place and I made a
Speaker 11: couple of cocktails, you know, try to impress it with that,
Speaker 11: and I can buy them and I can make them.
Speaker 1: Dude, I am always impressed when people can make like
Speaker 1: a cocktail at home. A yeah, that's awesome.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 11: And then we talked about a bucket list stuff, you know,
Speaker 11: just the deeper conversations.
Speaker 5: Or like what would you do if you want the lottery?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 15: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Like those are fun coms.
Speaker 1: Well, and you guys have already skydives, so that's offul end,
Speaker 1: you know, trying to discuss which family member do you
Speaker 1: like the least, which family member is worth the most money?
Speaker 5: In your humble opens if one went missing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so that sounds like fun.
Speaker 1: Okay, I mean did she yeah, did she stay the night?
Speaker 11: Yeah she did, so it went well. And okay, you know,
Speaker 11: she just left her charger here. So that's what I
Speaker 11: was trying to use to end back into.
Speaker 1: Talking to her, to come back from well, maybe she's
Speaker 1: not texting back because the phone's dead. She doesn't have
Speaker 1: the charger, do you see?
Speaker 11: You know what, I shouldn't have committed kidnapping, So.
Speaker 3: Lead us to the point of like, how did you
Speaker 3: send that joke text about her family? How did you
Speaker 3: get there?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 11: Yeah, so I sent her text about the charger and
Speaker 11: then he didn't respond, and then I just sent her
Speaker 11: another text about like, hey, what's up and no response.
Speaker 3: Huh Yeah. I wouldn't respond to that one either.
Speaker 1: Like that so funny.
Speaker 11: And so then I sent her the joke one that
Speaker 11: you guys know whether I said yeah, and then an
Speaker 11: hour later I sent another text to saying I'm joking,
Speaker 11: and then there was no response to that either.
Speaker 9: Clarify.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think she probably knew you were joking,
Speaker 1: But you know, why do you even want to go
Speaker 1: out with this girl?
Speaker 3: She doesn't get your sense of humor.
Speaker 11: We just had so much in common. We had a
Speaker 11: great time. So I'm like, why did you come over
Speaker 11: to my place if you didn't like me. I don't
Speaker 11: understand why there's so many mixed signals right now.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you just for the electricity in your outlets like that.
Speaker 1: Pretty But she left the charger. Yeah, it wasn't that
Speaker 1: important to her.
Speaker 3: It's almost like she was planning on coming back, if anything. Yeah, maybe,
Speaker 3: I mean, we're gonna find out when we come back.
Speaker 3: We'll call CC for you, make sure her family's okay,
Speaker 3: and then try and get you a second date update
Speaker 3: right after.
Speaker 1: This important to confirm.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we're just gonna check hold on second date update
Speaker 3: if you're just joining us. Our listener, John is confused
Speaker 3: because he went to drinks with a woman named Cec.
Speaker 3: They picked up a charger for her dying phone, and
Speaker 3: after that spent the entire evening over at his place
Speaker 3: till she left the next day. But now CEC's not
Speaker 3: responding and we don't know why. And John, in no
Speaker 3: way do I want you to think that this has
Speaker 3: anything to do with your romantic skills in the bedroom. Okay,
Speaker 3: even though Brooke wrote it down on a piece of
Speaker 3: paper and passed it to me while giggling uncontrollably. I
Speaker 3: don't want you to think that, even though jose and
Speaker 3: Alexis both went online and tweeted that they think it's that,
Speaker 3: I just don't want you to think it.
Speaker 11: I think she enjoyed herself thoroughly, and I think those
Speaker 11: are all misconceptions the spirit, John, don't.
Speaker 3: Let reality set in on your life. We're just kidding,
Speaker 3: by the way, just like the way you were kidding
Speaker 3: about the family abduction text that she sent her trying
Speaker 3: to get her to respond to you.
Speaker 1: She never even gave you a haha on that one.
Speaker 5: Risky jokes is what we're saying.
Speaker 11: Yeah, I mean, I feel like you guys are telling
Speaker 11: being more truthful than I was what your thoughts were.
Speaker 3: Okay, someone's confessing a little bit.
Speaker 1: Too much, ok Okay. I mean these are always weird
Speaker 1: ones because I honestly don't know what I mean. We
Speaker 1: don't know what she's going to say. It could be anything.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they would really defeat the purpose of the call
Speaker 3: if we knew what she was.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you can tell, like what someone did wrong, like
Speaker 1: this could be maybe.
Speaker 2: A text is a start.
Speaker 1: Well, she was already not texting him back. By the
Speaker 1: time he sent that, I think that the nail in
Speaker 1: the coffin has already been laid more anti climactic.
Speaker 5: Sometimes it's just like, yeah, I had a fun night
Speaker 5: and that's all I wanted, and that could be.
Speaker 3: But in our mind, you've done absolutely nothing wrong. Okay,
Speaker 3: John's zero working against you right now. You're the perfect man,
Speaker 3: and I believe that firmly.
Speaker 1: While we dial her, not do I need to pass
Speaker 1: you another note?
Speaker 3: Keep your notes over there. Let's wait till we get
Speaker 3: her on the phone.
Speaker 10: Here we go.
Speaker 3: Hello, Hey, we're looking for CC.
Speaker 6: Yeah, this is her.
Speaker 3: Hey, you don't have to sound too excited.
Speaker 1: Who's coming.
Speaker 3: It's a good day for you because you're on the
Speaker 3: radio right now with Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 1: Hey, Hi, oh my god, I kind of like her already.
Speaker 16: Doesn't care.
Speaker 3: Are you in a bad mood because something's going on
Speaker 3: with your family?
Speaker 6: You know, I'm.
Speaker 10: Weird.
Speaker 3: 's fine, But we're doing something maybe the clear things
Speaker 3: up here for you. We're doing something called a second
Speaker 3: Date Update, and we're trying to help one of our
Speaker 3: listeners out to get a hold of you. It's a
Speaker 3: guy that you went out on a date with recently
Speaker 3: named John.
Speaker 1: Okay, John, who still has your cell phone charger?
Speaker 7: John?
Speaker 6: Okay, it's weird he's telling you stuff that. Yeah, okay, that's.
Speaker 3: Kind of something that we do here. And the reason
Speaker 3: why I brought up the family thing earlier is because
Speaker 3: he told us about the text message that he sent you,
Speaker 3: the joke about you know, if you don't respond, you'll
Speaker 3: never see your family again, or something like that.
Speaker 10: What did you do?
Speaker 3: Everybody? Brook laughed the heartest in this entire room.
Speaker 1: It was a bold move. We'll say that. What did
Speaker 1: you think when you read that? Cec?
Speaker 6: I honestly I thought it was hilarious.
Speaker 3: Okay, well that's true. Then why didn't you respond?
Speaker 6: I honestly just don't want to leave him on. Oh
Speaker 6: it's a funny guy just texting back. Ah, you know,
Speaker 6: even that kind of just another opening. You know, Well,
Speaker 6: and that's a funny guy.
Speaker 5: You're doing the right thing, because the second U L
Speaker 5: O L back, We're gonna.
Speaker 9: Just keep going.
Speaker 15: It is.
Speaker 1: It is exhausting. Someone else was actually complimented as being
Speaker 1: funny and Jose, you even use that as an opening.
Speaker 3: Jeff, Well, don't you think that leading him on would ensue,
Speaker 3: like going back to his place and spending the night.
Speaker 3: Isn't that kind of leading him on?
Speaker 1: Well maybe you liked him at that point.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, honestly, we had a great time. It
Speaker 6: was it was super fun. I had a lot of
Speaker 6: fun with him.
Speaker 7: I just.
Speaker 10: Is, what, what is it?
Speaker 2: You just wanted one night thing?
Speaker 6: Honestly? The tough part is I had such a good
Speaker 6: time with him. I honestly, I was waking up in
Speaker 6: the morning and I thought that going on some more
Speaker 6: dates that could honestly be something like, oh my gosh, yeah,
Speaker 6: leading this guy. I really liked him.
Speaker 3: So are you just like he's also good? I don't.
Speaker 3: I don't understand. Are you nervous because it was too
Speaker 3: good and you think you'll never be able to match
Speaker 3: that level of greatness on a date ever? Again? I mean,
Speaker 3: I hear that about me all the time about other guys.
Speaker 3: So what's going on?
Speaker 6: I honestly wish that it was something like self involved?
Speaker 6: Is that I guess? But it's honestly, So it sounds
Speaker 6: like he told you that I went to his house
Speaker 6: so I slept over. Yeah, yeah, and in the morning
Speaker 6: I went to the bathroom and he had like one
Speaker 6: of those like fancy heated toilets.
Speaker 1: Oh god, those are so nice in the morning.
Speaker 3: Yeah, why is that important that we need to know that?
Speaker 6: So go back to the bedroom and like he's already up.
Speaker 6: We're about to probably make breakfast or get on those
Speaker 6: our days. I'm getting dressed, and I goes like, oh, dude,
Speaker 6: I was like, that toilet is elite. I was like,
Speaker 6: that is so awesome having a heated toilet, okay, And
Speaker 6: he said that he doesn't have a heated toilet.
Speaker 1: Huh, what do you mean he doesn't.
Speaker 12: It?
Speaker 6: So I suppose maybe it was hot from the person
Speaker 6: who had used it before me, but it was like
Speaker 6: I thought it was technology making it that hot.
Speaker 1: Oh, like he had been sitting there for a while
Speaker 1: before you went into the bathroom somebody else. I don't.
Speaker 6: I can't imagine how hot somebody would have to be
Speaker 6: to have this seat be that hot when I got
Speaker 6: to it.
Speaker 3: So you're saying, I don't know, y'all.
Speaker 6: I feel like, honestly awful, But it's like it's an ick.
Speaker 6: I literally can't get over it, and I feel so guilty.
Speaker 6: I'm like, I just it's not worth like hurting him
Speaker 6: and being weird.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm just spending that long in there. It's like
Speaker 2: that's a nic. I feel like a girl.
Speaker 6: Well like he didn't. He wasn't even in there long. No,
Speaker 6: not when you have a long He was next to
Speaker 6: me in bed when I got up to go to
Speaker 6: the bathroom, and I hadn't seen him go to the bathroom.
Speaker 6: So it's like how long ago were just will be
Speaker 6: scolding hot?
Speaker 1: Well, it was stipt next to him, be a hot sleeper,
Speaker 1: like we have a lot of quo.
Speaker 3: I don't know how your ears feel if they're feeling
Speaker 3: a little bit warm right now, because John is actually
Speaker 3: on the line too, so maybe you're feeling that.
Speaker 1: It's about the button.
Speaker 6: Yeah, John, fine, can I ask you a question?
Speaker 11: Yourck is a guy using the bathroom before you?
Speaker 3: That's your eck?
Speaker 6: Like that's not my sick at all. No, it's how
Speaker 6: hot the seat was just so weird?
Speaker 1: Are you a sweaty guy? You run hot? There? John?
Speaker 11: I mean I do, but like that's my butt with
Speaker 11: the assist you have like a nice warm party.
Speaker 6: I'm not saying that's Unsaye, And I want to heart
Speaker 6: your feelings like you're awesome. I don't want to make
Speaker 6: you feel weird about it. I'm like, I'm the one
Speaker 6: who feels I don't.
Speaker 9: Know what it is.
Speaker 6: It's in It's like in my head, you can't like ingrained,
Speaker 6: like how hot it was? Like I thought you had
Speaker 6: had technology making your seat hot.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, is a problem for you, John, Do
Speaker 3: you ever notice that your underwear is like melting down legs?
Speaker 1: He's like, I don't need seat warmers now.
Speaker 11: It's eat me like on the human torch, Like I
Speaker 11: don't know, just like a normal person using the bathroom here,
Speaker 11: Like it's not I know, And I just feel.
Speaker 6: This is why I didn't want to I didn't want
Speaker 6: to have to make you even like question how hot
Speaker 6: your butt was?
Speaker 1: Like CC, there's no way you can work through this,
Speaker 1: Like yeah, sure, maybe in that moment it was an ick,
Speaker 1: but like what about from now on you always get
Speaker 1: to use the restroom first?
Speaker 3: You know, it's like a good yeah, something that all
Speaker 3: relationships have to do, like schedule who goes to the
Speaker 3: bathroom when?
Speaker 1: Or just you know, eventually down the road you just
Speaker 1: get someplace with two toilets. I don't know, Oh, you
Speaker 1: already have to schedule it if you live with a man.
Speaker 1: Let's be honest, Like, you guys spend so much time
Speaker 1: in there.
Speaker 3: I mean it does seem like CC, this is a
Speaker 3: lot to leave a guy who he had such a
Speaker 3: great time with, had a huge connection with. You're gonna
Speaker 3: give all of that up because the toilet seat was
Speaker 3: a little warm?
Speaker 6: Well, now, am I the weird that it even ick?
Speaker 6: That I had an ick about the hot seat?
Speaker 1: Like, I think you're overthinking this, CC. Make you think
Speaker 1: it way too hard about the ick? Yeah, like what
Speaker 1: about the good parts? What's the opposite of ick?
Speaker 3: Like Brooks trying to solve the issue for you over
Speaker 3: here of John, do you have any ideas, any solutions
Speaker 3: in your mind?
Speaker 11: Yeah, I'll just buy a Twitter Wars and you'll never
Speaker 11: know when.
Speaker 3: I use it, honestly, and now you know, regardless, if
Speaker 3: that's a real solution, that's funny, Cee. See, he's a
Speaker 3: funny guy. He's a good time and he has solutions
Speaker 3: too to the problems. I think, personally, you should see
Speaker 3: him for another date, a date that we would pay for.
Speaker 3: If you're willing to go out with him one more time.
Speaker 6: I would very much be willing to go out on
Speaker 6: another date now that you guys bridge all of this,
Speaker 6: I didn't have to hide my shame.
Speaker 3: Congratulations John. You can release her mother now out of
Speaker 3: your customer.
Speaker 11: I'll do it, but I'm keeping her sister.
Speaker 3: He took a little too farther bud.
Speaker 7: Looking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: It's funny. I feel like ladies have a lot more
Speaker 3: random x when it comes to dating than guys.
Speaker 5: It's actually funny.
Speaker 1: Nowadays we're just in more of a power position where
Speaker 1: I think we're we can Yeah, you know, there's.
Speaker 4: The power has gone to your the It has always happened,
Speaker 4: but girls have a word for it now.
Speaker 3: I mean if that happened to me with a warm
Speaker 3: toilet seat, personally, I wouldn't be grossed out by that.
Speaker 3: Alexis said she could understand the ick and that he's
Speaker 3: probably been on it for a long time.
Speaker 1: Alexis likes to imagine that no one actually goes to
Speaker 1: the back my topic.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, I'm just asking all the women out there
Speaker 3: to lower your ick tolerance. Please be a little bit
Speaker 3: more understanding of all the things that guys go through,
Speaker 3: things that we put.
Speaker 2: Up with you guys saying that giving you the a
Speaker 2: little bit it's like turning me off.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's kind of It feels like.
Speaker 3: Thirsty. You guys are just perfect, aren't you. I don't
Speaker 3: know what they're going to call this second update, if
Speaker 3: they're going to call this hot bottom Boys or whatever
Speaker 3: it is, but you go check it out on our
Speaker 3: podcast wherever you get yours, unless you don't want to
Speaker 3: get the ick. Check it out at Brook and Jeffrey.
Speaker 7: Wait brooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3: If you're having a wedding, it's a lot more than
Speaker 3: just planning one cute ceremony with the reception after. There's
Speaker 3: all these events that lead up to the big day,
Speaker 3: with rehearsals and tastings and fittings and the practice consummations
Speaker 3: in front of the efficient. You don't want to do
Speaker 3: a bad job on your wedding night. Do you try
Speaker 3: it again? This time with more enthusiastics are doing it.
Speaker 3: You've not much a long way. But over the weekend
Speaker 3: there is another huge event with hundreds of soon to
Speaker 3: be brides and grooms in attendance, and we sent our
Speaker 3: own jose and Alexis there to ask them, Hey, what
Speaker 3: you're doing here? And I'll tell you the answers were
Speaker 3: just as awkward as a practice cons. We're going to
Speaker 3: play you the audio coming up right after this. What
Speaker 3: do you get when you have hundreds of soon to
Speaker 3: be brides crammed together in one room with unlimited mimosas
Speaker 3: and all the free cake samples you can even Oh
Speaker 3: my god, my.
Speaker 1: God, just picture tears, but also screams of joy.
Speaker 5: Here's positive.
Speaker 1: A lot of ladies tell each other how beautiful they are.
Speaker 3: It's basically a hurricane of laughs, lace and Linen's. Yeah,
Speaker 3: all the things a wedding vendor is hoping to upsell
Speaker 3: you on, because nothing screams I'm preparing for the most
Speaker 3: important day of my life, like freaking out over what
Speaker 3: pattern of chair covers they're gonna match with your rose
Speaker 3: gold plate chargers. Which is why we sent our own
Speaker 3: Jose and Alexis down to the local wedding expo to
Speaker 3: ask all the brides and the grooms that they dragged
Speaker 3: along with a very simple question, what you're doing at
Speaker 3: the wedding expo? What you're doing at the wedding expo?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 3: Figuring out what how our wind is going to look? Okay,
Speaker 3: you're wandering around here? Is this your uh congratulations.
Speaker 17: Okay, So let me ask you something though, If you
Speaker 17: could have one decision, she has no saying guaranteed to
Speaker 17: happen in the wedding. Anything you want, what's it gonna be, bro,
Speaker 17: I'm talking anything.
Speaker 3: All my grooves, man. I want them to show up
Speaker 3: on motorcycles.
Speaker 9: Motorcycles?
Speaker 3: Yeah, how like down the aisle, everybody coming on.
Speaker 17: So when they're standing next to you, would they be
Speaker 17: standing or sitting on their bike.
Speaker 3: Everybody's gonna be sitting on their bike right behind me,
Speaker 3: and I want my bike behind me too.
Speaker 17: If you can pull this off, this will be the
Speaker 17: dopest wedding ever. So let me ask your bride, are
Speaker 17: you giving them the green light? Or are you thinking
Speaker 17: something else?
Speaker 1: Just have an.
Speaker 3: Elopement motorcycle wedding break?
Speaker 1: Wow so loud? Can you imagine how and.
Speaker 3: How smoky hopefully outside? I kind of like it though.
Speaker 3: Room's been like reving their engines as like the bows
Speaker 3: are being.
Speaker 17: Like said, if anybody objects and just throw spike streight, No, no,
Speaker 17: that is gonna lend to.
Speaker 1: A dress cut in the wheel.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm supported.
Speaker 2: Still, what's you doing at the wedding? X?
Speaker 10: Though?
Speaker 2: I'm here supporting my sister who's getting married. Okay, and
Speaker 2: I see are you already married?
Speaker 7: Uh?
Speaker 2: No, maybe one day if he gets his act together. Wait,
Speaker 2: but that looks like a big ring on your finger.
Speaker 1: That is very correct.
Speaker 2: So is it like a promise ring? What kind of
Speaker 2: ring is it?
Speaker 7: Uh?
Speaker 1: We got into an argument.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I don't even know where this is going.
Speaker 10: But I and it's his great grandmother's and he gave
Speaker 10: it to me and it was his way of showing
Speaker 10: how serious he.
Speaker 2: Is about us. But you're not engaged. But you have
Speaker 2: kind of a wedding ring and that is the only
Speaker 2: finger it fits on. I swear.
Speaker 7: Wait.
Speaker 2: Wait, so he didn't give it to you and say
Speaker 2: put it on your wedding ring finger? No, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 2: this was a personal choice. So do you think your
Speaker 2: boyfriend will I'll propose here?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Was that convincing?
Speaker 7: No?
Speaker 1: Okay, that is so awkward.
Speaker 5: So he gave it to her as I'm sorry, I
Speaker 5: love you, I'm serious, did not propose.
Speaker 3: And she's engage.
Speaker 1: This is why men should never get the family heirloom
Speaker 1: diamond passing it out.
Speaker 3: I have a feeling that you're gonna see that exact
Speaker 3: same girl at every single wedding expo the next like
Speaker 3: seven years, still waiting for that proposal. Yeah, well, probably.
Speaker 5: Helps get a lot of free stuff.
Speaker 3: It's what you're doing at the wedding expo where Jose
Speaker 3: and Alexis went through a sea of excited brides and
Speaker 3: nervous grooms, trying to ask them all a simple question,
Speaker 3: what you're doing at the wedding expo.
Speaker 10: I'm doing the spinning wheel. Let's go, let's go. Let's go,
Speaker 10: all of brides, let's go. Whoa, oh, we're spinning the wheel.
Speaker 10: There's a big wheel eleven, seven and five and the
Speaker 10: numbers you're trying to hit. We're getting a couple of
Speaker 10: vacations away for you and your spouse. Let's see if
Speaker 10: you're a winner. Let's go.
Speaker 17: Wait, so if it lay on a vacation, I really
Speaker 17: win a.
Speaker 10: Vacation grand prize promise. It's Sunday, it's slowing down. Come on,
Speaker 10: and you actually.
Speaker 3: I'm going to my choice of Las Vegas or San Diego.
Speaker 3: It's really he won, I really won. Oh my god,
Speaker 3: you give me a pamphlet. What is a pamphlet?
Speaker 10: SA sample says you're a winner. Free two Night's day,
Speaker 10: Las Vegas, and Disney.
Speaker 3: Oh wait, is this like a timeshare thing?
Speaker 1: Do you want a timeshare thing?
Speaker 12: Oh?
Speaker 3: Wait a minute, come oh they tell everything at these wedding.
Speaker 1: Did you well?
Speaker 5: You hear me the pamphlet and it's like you won,
Speaker 5: You're amazing, And then you see a.
Speaker 9: Lot of fine writing.
Speaker 1: Everybody won.
Speaker 5: I think a lot of it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you went a lifetime of luxury in San Diego
Speaker 3: after you put down your three thousand dollars. Congratulations.
Speaker 5: Now you're forced to come back every year.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was so excited for you.
Speaker 5: I really.
Speaker 2: What's she doing at the wedding expo? I said yes
Speaker 2: to my dress?
Speaker 16: However, I think seeing you guys here, I'm way more
Speaker 16: excited to see you.
Speaker 2: Guys here than even picking out my dress. Oh my god,
Speaker 2: it's taking a picture with you. Please yeah? Wait wait,
Speaker 2: can I ask you one more pebocc Yeah? I got
Speaker 2: my picked out my dress.
Speaker 16: My wedding's on the thirty first of August, and I
Speaker 16: have eight flipping bridesmaide, Oh my eight flippin Is it
Speaker 16: a good or bad thing?
Speaker 3: It's great thing. It's gonna be a frickin' rager.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, wait, what's gonna make it? Reader, open bar.
Speaker 2: How U chocolatein bar?
Speaker 1: All the booze you can drink, and a lot of
Speaker 1: twisted teas.
Speaker 16: I love twisted supposed to be like bring your own
Speaker 16: case of teas.
Speaker 1: Oh my yeah, my old man wears like twisted tea.
Speaker 1: Like that's tea time.
Speaker 16: In our family, we do tea time, shotgun and twisted
Speaker 16: teas all the all day.
Speaker 2: Dude, everyone of the wedding's gonna feature.
Speaker 16: Everybody will be hammered at my way, she had everybody.
Speaker 2: Yes, what are you gonna do if someone there is sober?
Speaker 2: You kick them out.
Speaker 3: For the office.
Speaker 1: I feel like she's the reason why you should not
Speaker 1: have motorcycles at your wedding.
Speaker 3: But now I know why she needs the eight bridesmaids.
Speaker 3: She needs them all to help carry her unconscious body
Speaker 3: down the aisle up to the altar.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you know, for the bridesmaids will also be there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what you're doing at the wedding.
Speaker 7: Wow, Brook and Jeffrey in the morning, ladies.
Speaker 3: And gentlemen, I am proud to introduce a brand new
Speaker 3: player to the game today. She is an all star
Speaker 3: project manager at her company. She has a one year
Speaker 3: old at home and she has a first name, and
Speaker 3: that name is El. Hello, l Hi Hi?
Speaker 1: Is that a name or just a letter?
Speaker 6: Oh, it's your name?
Speaker 3: She Broke immediately changed you for your name, congratulated.
Speaker 1: It's like a nickname like they call me Be, you
Speaker 1: know for Brooks.
Speaker 6: Well that's true anyway.
Speaker 3: But Elle does think that she can beat Brooks today.
Speaker 3: Why do you think that?
Speaker 6: I'm really overly confident. I think it's the thing just
Speaker 6: in life, in areas of life like this.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, what what are you not confident in?
Speaker 3: Im?
Speaker 6: Probably being a mom.
Speaker 1: I'm sure you're doing a great job. We all think
Speaker 1: that as mother's.
Speaker 3: You know, Elle, you're doing awesome in your life. We're
Speaker 3: gonna send Be out of the studio and while she leaves,
Speaker 3: you know, the game wheks. He got thirty seconds to
Speaker 3: answer as many questions as possible. If you don't know when,
Speaker 3: you can say past. But you do have to beat
Speaker 3: Brooke outright to win? Are you ready?
Speaker 11: Sure?
Speaker 10: Why not?
Speaker 3: Good life?
Speaker 9: Not overly confident?
Speaker 3: Come on, it's happening. Here we go. Your time starts
Speaker 3: now on this day in two thousand, which female celebrity
Speaker 3: joined Regis Philbin as the co host of Live.
Speaker 6: Uh fast.
Speaker 3: What is the shape of the scar on Harry Potter's
Speaker 3: forehead a lightning bolt? In Which decade did college basketball
Speaker 3: introduce the three point shot?
Speaker 10: Uh?
Speaker 6: Nineteen ninety.
Speaker 3: What type of spider is known for having a red
Speaker 3: hourglass shape on its back?
Speaker 6: Black Widow?
Speaker 3: In the Super Mario Brothers video game, Mario jumps on
Speaker 3: what after completing a level? All right, good work there, else,
Speaker 3: especially for a first show, and very well done. Brook's
Speaker 3: coming back into the studio.
Speaker 12: Now.
Speaker 3: Fun fact about Elle I'm seeing here is that she
Speaker 3: has been married to her husband for twenty years, and
Speaker 3: her husband has stopped giving you flowers and candy a
Speaker 3: long time ago. I'm assuming that's because he found out
Speaker 3: you were allergic to them and he's being a good guy.
Speaker 3: Oh is that why?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 1: No, not even yeah, I'm because he just showers her
Speaker 1: with foot massages.
Speaker 6: And yeah, every day is Valentine's Day.
Speaker 1: Oh my husband tries to pull that. Why were celebrating this?
Speaker 1: It shouldn't be that there's just one day for love,
Speaker 1: and I'm.
Speaker 3: Like, no, is it like world just filled with happy
Speaker 3: couples fully in love? All right, Brooke, you're up? Are
Speaker 3: you ready? Good luck? Your time starts now on this
Speaker 3: day in two thousand, which female celebrity joined Regis Philbin
Speaker 3: as the.
Speaker 1: Co host of Live h Kelly Rippa.
Speaker 3: What is the shape of the scar on Harry Potter's forehead?
Speaker 1: That's a lightning?
Speaker 3: In Which decade did college basketball introduce the three point shot?
Speaker 1: Ooh, seventies?
Speaker 3: What type of spider is known for having a red
Speaker 3: hourglass shape on its back?
Speaker 1: Black Widow?
Speaker 3: In the Super Mario Brothers video game, Mario jumps on
Speaker 3: what after completing a level A pipe with a whopping
Speaker 3: two hundred and thirty six million. Who is the most
Speaker 3: subscribers for an individual on YouTube?
Speaker 1: Uh? You know, mister beast, We do know. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: I got stuck because I was thinking it was a flagpole.
Speaker 1: I was saying it had a pipe to go to
Speaker 1: the next level. But it's a flagpole, and you don't.
Speaker 3: Have to explain yourself to us. But we get it.
Speaker 3: You're super smart. Let's go to the scoreboard and see
Speaker 3: you guys did with Jose.
Speaker 7: It's been a.
Speaker 3: Long time since I smelled.
Speaker 9: Beautiful, since he smelled.
Speaker 11: L.
Speaker 9: Will you take the L today?
Speaker 12: Three?
Speaker 9: Correct?
Speaker 11: Oh?
Speaker 1: It's pretty good.
Speaker 6: L We'll see.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that doesn't sound a really confident Brook.
Speaker 1: You God for Wow fair Lee Kelly Ripper, everyone says
Speaker 1: that darn it.
Speaker 9: She ruins everything.
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's get these answers in on this day. In
Speaker 3: two thousand, Kelly Rippa was the one who joined Regis
Speaker 3: Filman on the Live Show. She's still hosting it today with.
Speaker 5: Her husband now.
Speaker 12: Right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, the scar on Harry Potter's forehead is in the
Speaker 3: shape of a lightning bolt. College basketball introduced the three
Speaker 3: point shot in the nineteen eighties. Nineteen eighties. Seven.
Speaker 1: Weird dude, I went to the Harlem Globetrotgers. They have
Speaker 1: a four point shot.
Speaker 3: You find a red hour glass shape on the back
Speaker 3: of a black widow spider. In the Super Mario Brothers
Speaker 3: video game. At the end, Mario jumps on a giant flagpole.
Speaker 3: And two hundred and thirty six million subscribers, mister Beast
Speaker 3: has by far the most of any individual on YouTube.
Speaker 1: I almost said Brook and Jeffrey in the morning because
Speaker 1: our YouTube is fantastic digital Jacob say you should subscribe
Speaker 1: at Brook and Jeffrey.
Speaker 3: But all right, well, sorry you didn't beat Brooke today,
Speaker 3: but just for playing you do win a pair of
Speaker 3: tickets to the Seattle Home and Garden Show, coming to
Speaker 3: the lumen Field Events Center February twenty second to the
Speaker 3: twenty fifth, with hundreds of exhibitors and experts sharing fresh
Speaker 3: ideas for home decor, design and remodeling.
Speaker 15: Congratulations, Okay, thanks, Yeah, maybe we'll consider that a date.
Speaker 1: Okay, tell you, I would really like it if you
Speaker 1: could buy yourself something for Valentine's Day. Okay, I think
Speaker 1: you deserve it.
Speaker 6: I can buy myself flowers.
Speaker 1: Okay, says Miley Cyrus.
Speaker 3: Thank you so much for playing love having you on.
Speaker 3: Come back and do it again. We'll be back to
Speaker 3: doing Brooks Bucks same time tomorrow, brook and Jeffrey in
Speaker 3: the morning.