Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's looking to shake up the
Speaker 1: beverage world, challenging vitamin water with a new product called
Speaker 1: SuDS with two US and a Z, it's recycled bathwater
Speaker 1: energy drinks. You want to go green, you better drink
Speaker 1: green with an ice cold can of SuDS. Get your
Speaker 1: fourteen pack with Laser Stories, a segment where we read
Speaker 1: weird news stories am around the globe just like everyone
Speaker 1: else does, except we've got a laser.
Speaker 2: Those other tub chuggers just don't.
Speaker 1: First Laser Story is out of Melbourne, Australia.
Speaker 2: A guy named Sammy.
Speaker 1: Faulkner is launching a new Korean barbecue joint, and before
Speaker 1: he even opened for business, he boasted a sign outside
Speaker 1: in big block letters that says, Hey, Sophia, you broke
Speaker 1: up with me because I was poor, and now I.
Speaker 2: Have money to open a Korean barbecue. Are you regretting it?
Speaker 3: Of course?
Speaker 4: It's a classic revenge Korean barbecue restaurant.
Speaker 1: Taylor is all the time, and it looks like he
Speaker 1: actually put up two signs, one on each side of
Speaker 1: the building, so he really wanted to make sure.
Speaker 2: That she saw it.
Speaker 4: Okay, maybe like you use this flex after you've been
Speaker 4: open and successful for a year.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no word from Sofia at all.
Speaker 2: Yeah, seen it or not, but it's gone.
Speaker 1: Pretty viral in Australia and maybe that's why. A week later,
Speaker 1: a donut joint nearby put up their own sign that
Speaker 1: said Yo Korean Barbecue. Don't worry about Sofia. We have
Speaker 1: all the dessert you need right here.
Speaker 4: Because he's still eating his feelings obviously not over Sophia.
Speaker 1: This guy, though, loves it because Sophia is becoming a
Speaker 1: main in Australia.
Speaker 3: He should have should have named it not Sophia's restaurant.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Unfortunately not a lot of people got the Sofia
Speaker 1: reference with the donut shop to see the first Yeah,
Speaker 1: but then stop more restaurants from joining in. A Mexican
Speaker 1: place then posted a sign that read Taco about that
Speaker 1: breakup Our Tacos won't ghost you like Sophia.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's too fun.
Speaker 1: It's funny because we all know the guy probably cheated
Speaker 1: and he's like yeah.
Speaker 2: With me, Well you get the picture.
Speaker 1: A lot of Sofia signs are popping up in Melbourne,
Speaker 1: and they continue to do so because every time they do,
Speaker 1: they make the news.
Speaker 2: And get free publicity.
Speaker 3: Okay, now here we are by Sophia.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: This next La stories out of grocery store headquarters for headquarters.
Speaker 3: Love it.
Speaker 1: Trader Joe's just up the price of a single banana
Speaker 1: for the first time in two decades. Wow, and it's
Speaker 1: by more than twenty percent.
Speaker 2: Who are getting expensive now?
Speaker 1: So if you didn't know, since two thousand and one,
Speaker 1: they've been selling bananas for nineteen cents apiece.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like a big thing at Trader Joe's.
Speaker 2: They brag about it.
Speaker 1: Even the displays say stuff like price for twenty years.
Speaker 2: Ryding I was like, why are we talking about banana price?
Speaker 4: It's like there, you know Costco dollar fifty hot dogs,
Speaker 4: that's bananas.
Speaker 1: Well not anymore because they just upped it to twenty
Speaker 1: three cents.
Speaker 2: Oh, come on, guys, four cents.
Speaker 1: They used to sell them by the pound like other
Speaker 1: stores do, but they switched to nineteen cents per banana.
Speaker 1: After the CEOs on old lady grab a bunch and
Speaker 1: then put him back, and he asked her why she
Speaker 1: didn't pull the trigger on the banana purchase, and she
Speaker 1: told him, Sonny, I may not live to that fourth banana.
Speaker 4: Oh, He's like, oh, se, a woman will give you one.
Speaker 1: And coincidentally enough, she did keel over in the checkout.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I'm just kidding. She made it out to
Speaker 2: the parking lot.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: But in other words, they've priced them individually for over
Speaker 1: two decades because of just one old lady's really casual
Speaker 1: fear of impending death.
Speaker 4: That is, I don't know why that fact warms my
Speaker 4: little trader Joe's heart.
Speaker 3: More another expensive She wouldn't like that. She's not here anymore.
Speaker 2: She's gone up those prices. This next laser story is
Speaker 2: out of Food News.
Speaker 1: Oreo fans are doing a double take after the beloved
Speaker 1: brand just announced the surprising new flavor and you guys
Speaker 1: can tell me what you think about it. But the
Speaker 1: snack brand just unveiled the upcoming arrival of Churo flavor
Speaker 1: cream Oreo.
Speaker 3: Yes, my god, how would this be bad? In what world?
Speaker 2: Is this not heaven and diabetes?
Speaker 3: Oh, it's so good to.
Speaker 2: Give you an idea.
Speaker 1: The cookies are tan in color as opposed to the
Speaker 1: usual dark one.
Speaker 3: There's a lot of tan and different colored.
Speaker 1: According to the description, each cookie will boast the flavors
Speaker 1: of fried dough and Churo flavor.
Speaker 3: Cry now, are there chunks in there?
Speaker 2: I don't want chunks.
Speaker 1: But.
Speaker 2: No one wants a chunky cookies.
Speaker 3: It's just flavored. It's just fried dough.
Speaker 2: Okay, the cream fill.
Speaker 3: Although I do want some tros right now.
Speaker 1: I know the announcement left some fans in disbelief, saying
Speaker 1: is this real? He said, They're extremely excited to try
Speaker 1: the new churo flavored cream oreos that someone commented, what
Speaker 1: a day to be an Oreo lover and a turo.
Speaker 2: For us diabetic. Sorry not everyone is such a big
Speaker 2: fan of the idea.
Speaker 1: One user wrote, I choked on a churro when I
Speaker 1: was in college. These oreos are bringing me right back
Speaker 1: to that cafeteria.
Speaker 2: No thank you.
Speaker 3: She wants to take bites of it. Try to put
Speaker 3: the whole thing in your mouth. The things for trauma shaving,
Speaker 3: the oreo.
Speaker 1: That this European inspired version is going to be hitting
Speaker 1: shelves today, like all of it's still good.
Speaker 3: I feel like that was a frat contest that Jeffrey
Speaker 3: took in your mouth.
Speaker 1: This next Lazer stories out of Game Show Central. Here's
Speaker 1: something you probably didn't know about.
Speaker 2: The price is right.
Speaker 3: I wasn't a contestant. I've been in the audience.
Speaker 2: There if you had gotten on stage.
Speaker 1: They are totally prepared in the event that a contestants
Speaker 1: bladder goes rogue. What's good because you always have to pee.
Speaker 2: I'd probably pee.
Speaker 4: Myself if you pee your pants. I mean I could see,
Speaker 4: like out of excitement.
Speaker 2: Lifelong dream to be on the show.
Speaker 1: A former producer went on record to say, quote, we
Speaker 1: had a system in place in case someone peed their pants.
Speaker 1: I never saw it happen, but there were curtains and
Speaker 1: a blow dryer and a pair of sweats just in case,
Speaker 1: since we would have to get on with the show.
Speaker 4: They come back from the showcase showed down and they
Speaker 4: just have different pants. It's like little Jimmy in second
Speaker 4: grade when you're like, I know, you weren't wearing those earlier.
Speaker 1: And they do have a lot of like older people
Speaker 1: in the audience, usually who are contestants on the show.
Speaker 2: So bladder control would totally be a problem.
Speaker 3: She just auction them off now that they're soiled.
Speaker 1: It's interesting because we have something similar with this radio program.
Speaker 1: If Laser Stories ever gets too funny and someone mistakenly
Speaker 1: takes a tuesy did you take it to.
Speaker 2: It's happened a lot. This guy is here for the cleanup.
Speaker 4: Oh god, is it for you know it's I think
Speaker 4: it's only Jeffy the turtle is just.
Speaker 2: Down the hallway.
Speaker 1: But he will be here in three days time, so
Speaker 1: you just have to be patient and it will get
Speaker 1: cleaned up.
Speaker 3: That's what the smell is.
Speaker 2: That's what means the stories has come from an end
Speaker 2: of the day. We'll do it again the same time
Speaker 2: on Friday
Speaker 3: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.