Speaker 1: Hello, puzzlers, Welcome to the Puzzler podcast, the Forgotten five
Speaker 1: dollars bill in your daily puzzle pants pocket. I am
Speaker 1: your host, AJ Jacobs, and today's guest is the awesome
Speaker 1: Neghine Farsad, comedian, writer and director, also host of the
Speaker 1: podcast Fake the Nation. Welcome Neighine.
Speaker 2: Hello, thanks for having me back.
Speaker 1: We are delighted. We enjoy your puzzling. Today, we wanted
Speaker 1: to talk about the English language because you are a podcaster,
Speaker 1: but you're also a writer and author. You wrote the
Speaker 1: book How to Make White People Laugh, a delightful book.
Speaker 1: As a writer, I'm guessing you might have noticed that
Speaker 1: the English language is insane. It's a crazy language, especially
Speaker 1: the spelling. Yes, are you do you? Are you a
Speaker 1: good speller? Moderate speller.
Speaker 2: I had a moment in my day of winning a
Speaker 2: couple of spelling bees at a very very hyper localized level.
Speaker 2: So I'm not trying to brag or anything, but nine
Speaker 2: or ten year old Nagine was doing some very good spelling.
Speaker 1: Wow, Okay, I didn't even know that side of you.
Speaker 1: Now I'm more impressed. Well do you remember any of
Speaker 1: your winning words?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 2: My god god no, But I think one thing that
Speaker 2: I do remember is that they were sort of like,
Speaker 2: you know, simple like the animal, like a you or something.
Speaker 2: It would just like throw you off. But they were
Speaker 2: a simple word of a sord or something. I remember
Speaker 2: they're spelling sometimes.
Speaker 1: That's interesting because we've talked about you on the show
Speaker 1: The Puzzler, because the only time you see you ewe
Speaker 1: is either in spelling bees or crossword puzzle. Like no
Speaker 1: one goes and says, hey, look at that beautiful you.
Speaker 2: I want to Yeah, I've never exactly, I've never uttered
Speaker 2: it in casual conversation exactly.
Speaker 1: I felt that was there a pun on utter or
Speaker 1: was that just me I feel? But as you said,
Speaker 1: you is a perfect example because it's there's you, there's ewe.
Speaker 1: Words are spelled in so many different ways but pronounced
Speaker 1: sometimes all over the place. So for instance, you might
Speaker 1: know that there are ten different pronunciations of the letters O, U,
Speaker 1: g H. There's tough, there's cough, there's bow, there's bow,
Speaker 1: there's maybe there's not bow, there's though, there's thought, anyway, hiccup.
Speaker 1: It goes on and on, And these are called I rhymes.
Speaker 1: So these are words that look like they should rhyme,
Speaker 1: but do not. So this is a puzzle about I rhymes.
Speaker 1: These are all two word phrases that look like they
Speaker 1: should rhyme when they're written, but they do not rhyme
Speaker 1: when they're said out loud. So if there was some
Speaker 1: hard uncooked bread, hard to chew uncooked bread, that might
Speaker 1: be tough dough, so they look but they don't.
Speaker 2: This is a This is one for Miriam Webster herself.
Speaker 2: I mean, okay, let's see what I can do. But wow,
Speaker 2: all right, you didn't.
Speaker 1: You're not easy to it. I'm sorry. Well, yes, Mariam
Speaker 1: was booked as we're funk and wagnal. Does that still exist?
Speaker 1: Funk and wagonyl It's just such a funny drunken white
Speaker 1: I believe are drunk and funk. But I'm here to help.
Speaker 1: I'm here to help. Your first clue is unhurried bovine.
Speaker 1: So this is an unhurried bovine. A bovine is uh,
Speaker 1: you know, sort of how now brown? Yeah, exactly, so
Speaker 1: one unhurried one. It's not fast as a.
Speaker 2: I mean, it's a slow cow.
Speaker 1: It's a it's a slow cow. Why did you say you? Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: a slow cow?
Speaker 2: Right? Okay, because like right, slow and cow look like
Speaker 2: they should rye, but they don't write.
Speaker 1: Okay, exactly, that's an eye right. You think it's either
Speaker 1: slow co or slow cow, y slow cow?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 1: What about a uh a checkered or tartan housekeeper? This
Speaker 1: is a housekeeper who is checkered or tartan. So a
Speaker 1: housekeeper as in, yes, a maid exactly. Now, think of
Speaker 1: something that's like a Scottish ai d yes, yes, a
Speaker 1: Scottish maid who wears what on there?
Speaker 2: Like maybe a maiden plaid.
Speaker 1: A maiden plaid, a plaid made exactly. You say it
Speaker 1: sometimes as if you're a tentative. But you got it,
Speaker 1: But I got it, But I know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1: I did not know by the way, checkered versus tartan,
Speaker 1: it's a whole thing. I looked it up. I don't
Speaker 1: know it's did you know I didn't understand that.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm gonna say tartan is more like plaid,
Speaker 2: and checkers is more like little squares.
Speaker 1: Yeah exactly, Yeah, you got all right, so I did
Speaker 1: know it was a whole thing. Well, speaking of clothing,
Speaker 1: here's here's another one. This is a a hush hush
Speaker 1: French hat. So this is a hat, a beret. Yes,
Speaker 1: Now this is a hush hush one that no one
Speaker 1: knows about it. It's very top ends in r e T.
Speaker 1: So you know it's gonna end in our e t.
Speaker 1: You whisper me a blank or tell me a blank
Speaker 1: or secret? Blank, secret beret? Exactly?
Speaker 2: You got sacred beret or secret the French.
Speaker 1: Exactly a secret? Exactly? All right? We got one more?
Speaker 1: Are you ready? This one is an animal boob. The
Speaker 1: boob of an animal might.
Speaker 2: Be the boob of an animal? I mean, is it
Speaker 2: an It's not utter or that we just talked about.
Speaker 1: No, no, I put that in your mind.
Speaker 2: Now this is.
Speaker 1: Like, you know, a very common synonym for boob, breast, blank,
Speaker 1: milk or blank. But yes, the.
Speaker 2: Breast of an as this is suddenly this this is
Speaker 2: a pornographic show. Suddenly, what do we do it?
Speaker 3: There?
Speaker 2: I was told this was the puzzler.
Speaker 1: This is listen as I say, we are very wholesome.
Speaker 1: This is just something that exists in nature. Okay, all right, gotcha? Okay,
Speaker 1: not so, but this is like an a blank of
Speaker 1: burden or beauty in the blank might be.
Speaker 2: Yes, the the breast beast, breast.
Speaker 1: You got its breast. Yes, why does heavy?
Speaker 2: It just feels so wrong because when now that you're
Speaker 2: talking about how like similer they look, you know that
Speaker 2: they should be the same sounding word. It feels very
Speaker 2: weird to say them next to each other.
Speaker 1: Well, yes, that's what we're here for, to make you
Speaker 1: feel weird.
Speaker 2: Yeah, to make my mouth feel really weird.
Speaker 1: But but I think it's it isn't instructive of how
Speaker 1: crazy the English language is, because he should be beast
Speaker 1: priest or it should be best pressed. Yeah, in one
Speaker 1: of those two.
Speaker 2: I don't know what do we talk to about this?
Speaker 2: Do I send an email to my senator? Who can
Speaker 2: I talk to about this? I want to change it.
Speaker 2: I don't like it, Sir, I don't like it.
Speaker 1: I am so glad you're passionate as I am out there.
Speaker 1: I will say Ben Franklin he wanted to reform spelling,
Speaker 1: So maybe write to him or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, we should have listened to that guy sometimes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, not all the time, not all the time, not
Speaker 1: all the time. He was the best of them in
Speaker 1: my opinion. That's my humble opinion. Well, thank you, Nighin,
Speaker 1: you did great. Where can people find more of your content?
Speaker 1: Whether it's rhyming or I rhyming or neither.
Speaker 2: Oh gosh, folks, I think you should totally subscribe to
Speaker 2: Fake the Nation, where if you get your podcasts, and
Speaker 2: if you happen to be a fan of animation, you
Speaker 2: can see me on the hear me on the adult
Speaker 2: swim show bird Girl. It's available on HBO Max or
Speaker 2: Max and it's a really fun show and there's a
Speaker 2: couple of seasons up there, so a lot to like
Speaker 2: sink your teeth into. I am Meredith the mind Taker,
Speaker 2: and I really enjenction.
Speaker 1: It all right, well, and we can hear you there.
Speaker 1: We can't see you there, but we can hear you there.
Speaker 1: Before we wrap up, as always for the puzzlers at home,
Speaker 1: an extra credit puzzle. This is top notch food for
Speaker 1: a carnivore, something a carnivore would really love. You will
Speaker 1: get the answer to the extra credit the next episode.
Speaker 1: And by the way, our intro phrase the one about
Speaker 1: the forgotten five dollars bill in your pants, that comes
Speaker 1: from puzzler listener Brandon Weathers, So thank you Brandon, and folks,
Speaker 1: if you have your own ideas for intro phrases, please
Speaker 1: go to the puzzler dot com and send them to
Speaker 1: us and we'll try to read them on air. And
Speaker 1: also one last bit of puzzler news. My new book
Speaker 1: is coming out soon on May seventh. It's called The
Speaker 1: Year of Living Constitutionally and it's about the puzzle of democracy.
Speaker 1: I attempt to follow the original meaning of the Constitution
Speaker 1: from seventeen eighty nine. We're talking muskets, quill pens, quartering soldiers.
Speaker 1: The pre publication reviews have been very kind. Booklist calls
Speaker 1: it fascinating and necessary and who am I to disagree?
Speaker 1: So please pre order The Year of Living Constitutionally if
Speaker 1: you can. It makes a huge amount of difference for
Speaker 1: the success of the book. The link is in the
Speaker 1: show notes on your podcast app. And get ready for
Speaker 1: some constitution theme puzzles coming soon. We'll meet here tomorrow
Speaker 1: for more puzzling puzzles that will puzzle you puzzlingly.
Speaker 3: Hey puzzlers, Greg Pliska here up from the Puzzle Lab
Speaker 3: with the extra credit answer from our previous episode. Neaghine
Speaker 3: Farsade was our guest, and she played Television newte in
Speaker 3: which each answer is the name of a television news
Speaker 3: program with one letter changed. Your extra credit clue was
Speaker 3: this is a PBS investigative documentary series about the first
Speaker 3: half of a golf course, and that, of course, is
Speaker 3: front nine, one letter changed from frontline. After you finish
Speaker 3: your round of golf, you should turn on the puzzler
Speaker 3: and join us.