Speaker 1: Hey, this is Anny and welcome to Steff. I'll never
Speaker 1: told your production of iHeartRadio. And yes, I am going
Speaker 1: solo today for this happy hour. Unfortunately, Samantha had a
Speaker 1: family thing come up, so sending all the best thoughts
Speaker 1: her away, But for today it is just been as
Speaker 1: always with these happy hours. Please drink responsibly if you
Speaker 1: choose to do so today, since I'm recording this a
Speaker 1: bit earlier and am solo. I am drinking water, which
Speaker 1: is I love. It's like my favorite drink. But yes,
Speaker 1: as you know, if you've been listening to the show
Speaker 1: for a while, I have been in kind of a
Speaker 1: reflective mood lately because because of anniversaries that have happened.
Speaker 1: The anniversary of Samantha coming on to this show, the
Speaker 1: anniversary of the other podcast I do called Savor just
Speaker 1: happened and we did a couple of episodes around that.
Speaker 1: But there was one thing I forgot to mention, which
Speaker 1: is there used to be a whole video aspect of
Speaker 1: Sminty and Savor, and that used to be my primary
Speaker 1: job and it's actually sort of how I became a
Speaker 1: host in a strange, strange way. So I just wanted
Speaker 1: to revisit that because I actually am really shy. People
Speaker 1: don't believe me when I say that, but I am.
Speaker 1: But I'm also like, I have a post it note,
Speaker 1: I have like post it notes everywhere that say be brave.
Speaker 1: So I'm very someone who's constantly trying to look that
Speaker 1: shyness in the eye and go past it. But that
Speaker 1: being said, I really don't like looking back at things
Speaker 1: that I've done. I think that it is useful to
Speaker 1: do that to see where you've grown, like where you
Speaker 1: could improve things like that, And for this podcast, we
Speaker 1: do listen back to our episodes, though it's largely to
Speaker 1: make sure there aren't errors or curse words that escaped
Speaker 1: being unbleeped. But other than that, I really don't like
Speaker 1: to look back. But for some reason, I just was
Speaker 1: remembering that I used to make all of these videos,
Speaker 1: and so I watched a couple of them, and I
Speaker 1: was pleasantly surprised that I was like, oh, this was
Speaker 1: pretty good. This was pretty good. And you know, it
Speaker 1: has a lot of caveat which I'm going to get
Speaker 1: into in a second, because I was like, this is
Speaker 1: pretty good for XYZ, But it was nice that I
Speaker 1: was out right embarrassed or disgusted by this thing that
Speaker 1: I did for many, many years. Okay, so I know
Speaker 1: I've told this story before. I'm not going to go
Speaker 1: into it again in depth. But essentially, the whole reason
Speaker 1: I have this job is because of a confluence of things.
Speaker 1: But one of them was I really wanted to make documentaries.
Speaker 1: I was so into it. My parents thought I would
Speaker 1: never succeed in that field, and they convinced me not
Speaker 1: to pursue it. I've been thinking about that a lot
Speaker 1: too lately, of like the times my parents sat me
Speaker 1: down and we're like, you're never going to make it
Speaker 1: in this but they did it in like such a
Speaker 1: nice way. But anyway, so I didn't go to school
Speaker 1: for that, but I was doing it on the side.
Speaker 1: I was trying to learn how to edit videos and
Speaker 1: produce videos and all of this stuff. It was always
Speaker 1: in the back of my head that I liked this,
Speaker 1: and then randomly I got this job interview for what
Speaker 1: was then House Stuff Works, but it was owned by
Speaker 1: the Discovery Channel at the time, and of course me
Speaker 1: and my documentary brain, who didn't really know much much better,
Speaker 1: That's what I'll say. I was like, Yes, I let
Speaker 1: me go in, but at the time, I was about
Speaker 1: to move to China and I never thought I would
Speaker 1: get the job. So my parents funnily enough convinced me
Speaker 1: to go in for this interview because they really didn't
Speaker 1: want me to move to China, so now it was
Speaker 1: their their best interest that I go and get this job.
Speaker 1: And I got it, and in part I was told
Speaker 1: because of pure enthusiasm, because if I'm being completely honest,
Speaker 1: I was self but I was definitely not qualified. I
Speaker 1: don't know how many other people they had coming in
Speaker 1: for that specific role because it was an internship thing,
Speaker 1: and it was an unpaid internship thing. Anyway, I got it,
Speaker 1: and I was commuting like an hour and thirty minutes
Speaker 1: away every day at the time, so I would come
Speaker 1: in at seven am and leave at three pm, which
Speaker 1: was not most people's schedules. Again, I'm very lucky that
Speaker 1: I have a flexible schedule at this job. But as
Speaker 1: part of that, I would use like those early morning
Speaker 1: morning hours before anyone was there, and I would try
Speaker 1: to learn more about what I would be doing, which
Speaker 1: was primarily making videos to support the podcast. I was
Speaker 1: also editing podcast, but primarily I was video which again
Speaker 1: fits with the I wanted to be in documentary, so
Speaker 1: I would show up and I'd be like Google knowing
Speaker 1: how to do this, and Final Cup Pro or whatever.
Speaker 1: Looking back, it was so intense. We had six videos
Speaker 1: per week that would be published on top of the podcast.
Speaker 1: At the time, it was Stuff I Never Told You
Speaker 1: I was working on. I did a couple of other
Speaker 1: shows as well, but those were much more like if
Speaker 1: someone needed a substitute for a week, I would make
Speaker 1: an episode of brain Stuff or something like that. But
Speaker 1: I was primarily on Stuff I've Never Told You. And
Speaker 1: this was a YouTube series that really developed its own following.
Speaker 1: That was largely due to Kristin Conger, who was the
Speaker 1: past host the creator of this show, who you can
Speaker 1: now find on Unladylike. She was the one that came
Speaker 1: up with the ideas. She would give me an SD
Speaker 1: card of everything she recorded, and then I would edit
Speaker 1: it and ad effects and then do all of the
Speaker 1: like writing of the title and the description and finding
Speaker 1: the thumbnail and all of that, and like, I'm not
Speaker 1: going to go into this but YouTube, because these were
Speaker 1: going up on YouTube mostly, but YouTube had such a
Speaker 1: very specific this is how you get people to stay
Speaker 1: until the end, while also advertising your other episodes that
Speaker 1: you have and I have a YouTube award that I
Speaker 1: won listeners. I'm not sure how it just showed up
Speaker 1: in the mail one day, but anyway, so I had
Speaker 1: to learn all of those things, and it was a
Speaker 1: very grueling schedule, and if you're like me, I was
Speaker 1: constantly second guessing myself, especially because I was self taught.
Speaker 1: I was learning this in the early morning hours before
Speaker 1: anyone showed up. I was practicing like outside of work.
Speaker 1: I had a really difficult time with color correction, which
Speaker 1: which if anybody knows, color correction is a pain. But
Speaker 1: also at this time, this was when there was a
Speaker 1: lot of pressure to go viral. I remember specifically having
Speaker 1: a meeting with a boss about that here's how you
Speaker 1: go viral, which is really silly because it's difficult to
Speaker 1: predict what will go viral, and so I would get well.
Speaker 1: I had these really intense deadlines, like if something hadn't
Speaker 1: gone up by three pm, which they determined was the
Speaker 1: best chance of maybe you'll go viral, I would get
Speaker 1: a call from my boss like it was very, very intense.
Speaker 1: I have a photograph that I took of the schedule
Speaker 1: that I had at the time, and I took a
Speaker 1: picture of it because it was ridiculous. But anyway, it
Speaker 1: was kind of like the driver was supposed to be,
Speaker 1: if you post constantly and consistently enough, then you will
Speaker 1: get this following and maybe go go viral. And this
Speaker 1: was also the age when videos were meant to look
Speaker 1: self produced. I think that is still going on, but
Speaker 1: it's much less so, so I'm never credited in any
Speaker 1: of them, which I don't have any bitterness about, but
Speaker 1: like looking back and kind of like, huh, but yeah,
Speaker 1: it was supposed to look sort of like a vlog
Speaker 1: of you know, this person just making this thing, which
Speaker 1: Kristin largely did do. This is also where my knowledge
Speaker 1: of thoughts came from, because I really wanted it to
Speaker 1: look like like a diary entry of something that you know,
Speaker 1: you're mom never told you and you're writing about it
Speaker 1: in your diary. So I had a lot of that
Speaker 1: stuff going on. Something else that I ran into while
Speaker 1: doing this was a lot of sexism around because we
Speaker 1: weren't the only show doing this by any means, but
Speaker 1: we were like the feminist show with women on it
Speaker 1: doing it, uh, where like male bosses would tell us,
Speaker 1: you know, Kristin needs to wear more makeup, the thumbnails
Speaker 1: need to be sexier, things like that, which we fought
Speaker 1: back against. But I still I know Kristin was putting
Speaker 1: on like it was a process. It's not like something
Speaker 1: you just do. She was putting on makeup. She has
Speaker 1: a whole episode on there that we did where she
Speaker 1: didn't wear any makeup and she was talking about how
Speaker 1: insecure it made her feel. But it was wild to
Speaker 1: be in a meeting where they were actually like, maybe
Speaker 1: show more cleavage, huh okay, And I'm just this young
Speaker 1: intern who is trying to figure things out and navigate.
Speaker 1: I want to be successful and I want to do
Speaker 1: the things that will make this successful, but also I'm
Speaker 1: not going to put like cleavage in a thumbnail. I
Speaker 1: was very I As I've said before, I learned a
Speaker 1: lot through this show, because I think at the time,
Speaker 1: I was still like not comfortable and not sure about
Speaker 1: speaking up for myself and about feminism and about like
Speaker 1: what I could do and what I could contribute. And
Speaker 1: looking back, I'm glad, but at the time I was
Speaker 1: really angry because they put me on the show because
Speaker 1: I was the only female editor. I was the only woman,
Speaker 1: and they were like, stuff, want ever told you should
Speaker 1: probably have a woman. I agree, but I was only one,
Speaker 1: and I was kind of like, I want to work
Speaker 1: on the science show and they're like, no, you're working
Speaker 1: on this show again. I'm very happy it turned out great.
Speaker 1: I learned so much and I'm very happy about it,
Speaker 1: but it was just sort of frustrating at the time,
Speaker 1: and I felt I was nervous. I think when you
Speaker 1: work on something feminist, I guess it's true just being
Speaker 1: a woman on the internet in general, but when you're
Speaker 1: working on something feminist and you feel like you're still
Speaker 1: coming to terms with what that means to you at
Speaker 1: a young age, it's scary. So it took a while
Speaker 1: for me to get my footing, and then I really
Speaker 1: got good editing. I got really good at editing, and
Speaker 1: I would try like new things, and I was still
Speaker 1: stressed about it, and I was still in my head
Speaker 1: about it because I never I mean, we were producing
Speaker 1: so much, but I never got like the color correction
Speaker 1: quite down. There was one time where my boss made
Speaker 1: me sit with the rest of the team, who were
Speaker 1: all men, who had all been doing this much longer
Speaker 1: than I had been and they watched a video I
Speaker 1: had made, and my boss was very like, see, she's
Speaker 1: on the cutting edge, she's the youth, all this stuff.
Speaker 1: But I was just embarrassed and horrified that he made
Speaker 1: them watch it, and I knew they were all of
Speaker 1: these things they could do better in it, like with
Speaker 1: the color correction and everything. And I felt like they
Speaker 1: kind of resented me for a minute after that because
Speaker 1: they were like, Okay, so it was. It was a
Speaker 1: strange thing. It was a strange environment, but I did.
Speaker 1: I learned so much, and we did so many cool,
Speaker 1: like goofy things. There's so many episodes that I look
Speaker 1: back on and I'm like, legitimately proud, and I think
Speaker 1: are really funny. I mean, overall, I'm proud of it,
Speaker 1: but certainly with all of the disclaimers I could put
Speaker 1: in here with we were producing this much, we had
Speaker 1: this much resources. It was just me and her like,
Speaker 1: but we developed a real following from YouTube. And it's
Speaker 1: kind of funny because it's separate, or it was separate
Speaker 1: from our following in the podcast. So some people on
Speaker 1: who would be huge fans on YouTube didn't realize that
Speaker 1: there was a podcast about someone ever told you and
Speaker 1: that was interesting. And they were also so many like
Speaker 1: heartfelt comments that we would get that I would read
Speaker 1: and really personal stuff and fans would shut down YouTube
Speaker 1: comments are notoriously terrible, and they would come in and
Speaker 1: shut that down, and that was It's amazing. This is
Speaker 1: also when I got doxed, was a video on YouTube.
Speaker 1: Funnily enough, that was that topic was a suggestion of
Speaker 1: my boss. Anyway, it was such a big part of
Speaker 1: my life. It was such a big part of my life,
Speaker 1: and it's strange to me that it feels so removed
Speaker 1: now because, as you listeners probably know, companies are always
Speaker 1: trying to look to capitalize in any way that they can.
Speaker 1: So it was like, at first it was a podcast
Speaker 1: that was the accompaniment to a blog, and then they
Speaker 1: were like, blogs aren't making money, so now it's videos
Speaker 1: is the accompaniment to the podcast. And then they were like, Okay,
Speaker 1: these videos aren't making money, and now they're coming back
Speaker 1: to videos again. So it's always kind of influx that way.
Speaker 1: But I just feel so far removed from this thing
Speaker 1: that was literally my entire job almost for many years.
Speaker 1: And the fact that I'm on this show now is
Speaker 1: because when Kristen and Caroline, the past host, left to
Speaker 1: do unladylike I didn't really have a job anymore, but
Speaker 1: the vacuum was filled by being a host is I
Speaker 1: was asked by host, So it has really been the
Speaker 1: whole video aspect really did change my life in a
Speaker 1: lot of ways, and I was really sad to see
Speaker 1: it end, and Kristen did like a farewell that had
Speaker 1: me in tears and was like just looking back, it
Speaker 1: was very retrospective and very acknowledging the work that we
Speaker 1: had done to make these and that meant so much
Speaker 1: to me because again I had so much imposter syndrome.
Speaker 1: I felt so inadequate. I I just was so on
Speaker 1: my head about it, and like any any comment I
Speaker 1: would get from either a coworker or a commenter that
Speaker 1: was negative, it would just send me in a spiral
Speaker 1: because I felt like, yeah, I don't I'm self taught.
Speaker 1: I'm largely self taught. That being said, I also want
Speaker 1: to shout out for the other podcast I do, Saver.
Speaker 1: We used to have a video aspect of those as well.
Speaker 1: I think there's only like five or six episodes, but
Speaker 1: there I went back to them and I was like,
Speaker 1: these are pretty good I also produced those. I was
Speaker 1: not the person behind the camera. That was friend of
Speaker 1: the show Tyler Klang and Casey Pegram and also Paul Dickentt.
Speaker 1: We had a lot of people, it was. It had
Speaker 1: more people than this Minty video series did. But they
Speaker 1: look really good and I was very happy. I was
Speaker 1: expecting to be like, oh, look, what a terrible job
Speaker 1: you did. There's always room for improvement, but it was
Speaker 1: nice to look back on something I did and think,
Speaker 1: all right, this is not bad, this is not bad.
Speaker 1: So those all of that stuff is still up. All
Speaker 1: of those videos that Kristin and I made together are
Speaker 1: still up on YouTube. You can find them under stuff
Speaker 1: We've Never told you. There are new videos that are
Speaker 1: going up I think daily that are just pretty much
Speaker 1: the audio of the podcast with the background to it,
Speaker 1: which is if that's how you prefer to listen to podcasts,
Speaker 1: totally get you. But there were like videos that we
Speaker 1: used to do and shout out to Kristen because she
Speaker 1: they planned them, acted them on top of still doing
Speaker 1: the podcast and everyally thing that she had to do
Speaker 1: so had segments, many segments we did. I liked the
Speaker 1: Our Kind of Herstory series where it was women in History.
Speaker 1: I liked that one a lot, But there was a bunch.
Speaker 1: There was a bunch of stuff that we tried and
Speaker 1: did and some of it worked out and so it
Speaker 1: did it. But yeah, it was just kind of a
Speaker 1: pleasant looking back. And also I did want to shout
Speaker 1: out just because I think you listeners might like it.
Speaker 1: There's a recent episode we did on the Savor podcast
Speaker 1: with Michelle Norris, who is an amazing award winning journalist
Speaker 1: from NPR amongst a bunch of other things, and also
Speaker 1: the host of the podcast or Mama's Kitchen, And I
Speaker 1: really think a lot of you would like it. It
Speaker 1: was really good and it got me thinking about a lot.
Speaker 1: So check all of this out. If you would like,
Speaker 1: please join me in sending all of the best thoughts
Speaker 1: and wishes to Samantha. But yeah, thank you for going
Speaker 1: down this journey. And if anyone has been here and
Speaker 1: has like seen the videos, I would love to hear
Speaker 1: from you. If you've been part of this evolution of mine,
Speaker 1: I would love to hear from you. But yes, you
Speaker 1: can email us at Stephanie and mom Stuff at iHeartMedia
Speaker 1: dot com. You can find us on Twitter at mom
Speaker 1: Stuff podcast or on Instagram and TikTok at stuff I've
Speaker 1: Never Told You. Yes, you can find us on YouTube. Also,
Speaker 1: we have a tea public store and a book you
Speaker 1: can find wherever you get your books. Thanks as always
Speaker 1: too our super producer Christina, our exective producer Maya, and
Speaker 1: our contributor Joey. And thanks to you for listening. Stephan
Speaker 1: Never Told You is production of iHeart Radio. For more
Speaker 1: podcasts from my heart Radio, you can check out the
Speaker 1: heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or you listen to your
Speaker 1: favorite shows m