Speaker 1: Congratulations, you've been accepted into the inaugural class of therapy
Speaker 1: for Black Rose University. Whether packing for a new year
Speaker 1: on campus, thinking through your gap year, enrolling in community college,
Speaker 1: or grabbing your souls for graduation, tbgu is here to
Speaker 1: help you thrive at this stage of your life and beyond.
Speaker 2: Hi. I'm Sorria Taylor and I'm the TBG podcast production intern.
Speaker 2: We'll return to Jana right after the break.
Speaker 1: One of the most alluring parts of the college experience
Speaker 1: is Greek life, but many people don't know the ins
Speaker 1: and outs of Swarty life. For those of you who
Speaker 1: don't know, I'm a proud member of Delta Sigma Beta
Speaker 1: Sobarty Incorporated. So I decided to gather my fellow D
Speaker 1: nine sisters for a conversation about Soworty life and the
Speaker 1: impact of the Divine Nine at large. Joining me for
Speaker 1: this round table are four impactful college aged women who
Speaker 1: represent each of the D nine sororities. Their names are
Speaker 1: Ryan Phillips, Valisia Rhodes, Trinity Perkins, and Toomey Udeju. They
Speaker 1: are members of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sort Incorporated, Sigma Gamma
Speaker 1: Rose Swordy Incorporated, Delta Sigma Theta Sword Incorporated and Zeta
Speaker 1: Phi Beta Sort Incorporated, respectively. In our conversation today, we
Speaker 1: dispel some common misconceptions about Sowarty life, bond over the
Speaker 1: joys of sisterhood, and discuss how we balance our mental
Speaker 1: wellness with our sorority responsibilities. Here's our conversation. Hi everyone,
Speaker 1: the conversation today is super exciting. Many of our listeners
Speaker 1: are likely familiar with the impactful presence of black Greek
Speaker 1: letter organizations on college campuses and in communities national and internationally.
Speaker 1: Today we have a special treat as each of our
Speaker 1: guests represents one of the Divine nine sororities. I love
Speaker 1: for each of you to take a moment to introduce
Speaker 1: yourselves by sharing the organization you're a part of, when
Speaker 1: and where you crossed.
Speaker 3: Hello everyone, my name is Tunia Dayju.
Speaker 4: I am part of Savery Authority Incorporated, and I'm here
Speaker 4: at the University of Houston and I cross all twenty
Speaker 4: two at the Family Fine five Song Chapter.
Speaker 3: You're at the Universe Houston. I'm a senior at the moment.
Speaker 5: Hi everyone, my name is Felicia Rhoades and I am
Speaker 5: a recent daily University graduate. I am a fall twenty
Speaker 5: one initiate of the Outstanding Alma Crime Chapter at Dale University,
Speaker 5: and I serve as best list for two years.
Speaker 6: Hi everyone, I'm Ryan Phillips. I am a current senior
Speaker 6: at Spelman College and I am a member of Alpha
Speaker 6: Kappa Alpha Sorority Incorporated, specifically the Sweet Newpi Chapter of
Speaker 6: Alpha Kapa Alpha Athority Incorporated at Spelman College.
Speaker 7: Hello everyone, my name is Trinity Perds. I am a
Speaker 7: member of the devastating Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Incorporated. I
Speaker 7: crossed spring twenty two at the University of North Texas
Speaker 7: in the Amazing Data Ada Chapter.
Speaker 1: Thank you for those lovely introductions. I am also a
Speaker 1: member of Delta Sigma Theta sowor It Incorporated, and I
Speaker 1: was initiated to the Kappa Omericron Chapter at the University
Speaker 1: of North Carolina at Chapel Hill in the spring of
Speaker 1: twenty twenty two. Hei So, Hi sore.
Speaker 2: So.
Speaker 1: To kick us off, I'm curious what motivated you to
Speaker 1: join your organization. Can you recall when you first knew
Speaker 1: it was something you wanted. I'll start with Ryan.
Speaker 6: So growing up, I'm actually a third generation legacy. My
Speaker 6: grandmother is a member, my mom is a member, and
Speaker 6: I became a member of the Spring of twenty two.
Speaker 6: I don't like doing things just because it's a family tradition.
Speaker 6: I actually like to stray away from those things. So
Speaker 6: I really had to find my own love for the sorority.
Speaker 6: And it really was just the sense of poise and
Speaker 6: grace that I saw so many women of Alpha Kappa
Speaker 6: Alpha Soriti incorporated embody when I was growing up, and
Speaker 6: just to see that constantly and to constantly look up
Speaker 6: to them in leadership roles and want to be a
Speaker 6: part of a sisterhood with like minded individuals.
Speaker 1: Really inspired me to join Felicia.
Speaker 5: For me, I am a first generation college student and soroar,
Speaker 5: So during my time at Dialard, I realized that I
Speaker 5: always knew I wanted to be a member of Greek life,
Speaker 5: but what was special to me about Sigma Gama Road
Speaker 5: was their commitment to education. And I was a bit
Speaker 5: of a nerd growing up, so I realized that I
Speaker 5: got to the point that I got to academically because
Speaker 5: I was so passionate about knowledge and using that knowledge
Speaker 5: for greater goods, and so seeing Sigma Gamma Row encourage
Speaker 5: women to pursue greater by being intellectuals, but also by
Speaker 5: using that knowledge to create change. That drew me in
Speaker 5: and it has kept me thus far.
Speaker 1: Trinity.
Speaker 7: So I moved from far north Dallas to the southern
Speaker 7: sector of Dallas. So I remember the first day of school,
Speaker 7: entering this new school where everyone was a person of color.
Speaker 7: I've never seen that before. And my teacher was actually
Speaker 7: a sore. And I never really heard of like Greek
Speaker 7: sororities or fraternities, but at my school, I vividly remember
Speaker 7: members of the different d nine fraterneys and sororities showing
Speaker 7: up to our classes to lunch. And I just remember
Speaker 7: my teacher. She was so so eloquent. She was really
Speaker 7: a leader. She was everyone's favorite teacher. So I said, okay,
Speaker 7: let me look more into this sorority and see what
Speaker 7: they are about. And I saw that we have a
Speaker 7: strong foundation for education. And once again, similar to everyone
Speaker 7: on this panel, I am a huge nerd So I said, okay,
Speaker 7: that's like a check mark. But also what stood out
Speaker 7: to me was the Deltas in my area were heavy
Speaker 7: on community service. You saw them book drives, toy drives,
Speaker 7: clothing drives, registering other people to vote, emphasizing the importance
Speaker 7: of voting, and that hit every single value that I
Speaker 7: grew up with in my home. So I knew that
Speaker 7: Delta Sigma Theta was the sorority.
Speaker 1: For me and to me.
Speaker 4: So for me, none of my family were Greek. The
Speaker 4: only Greek person is my brother. He's in a multicultural fraternity.
Speaker 4: But I came from a lot of pwi's. I grew
Speaker 4: up in Michigan originally, and I moved to Texas when
Speaker 4: I was like thirteen fourteen, so I didn't really know
Speaker 4: about black lettered Greek organizations. I knew about the Panalytics
Speaker 4: and the IFCs, but I never knew there were ones
Speaker 4: for like black women, and especially as a first gen
Speaker 4: my parents were Nigerian immigrants. I I didn't really get
Speaker 4: exposed to all of that at a young age because
Speaker 4: they didn't know about it, so I didn't know about it.
Speaker 4: So coming to UH, I really was exposed to it,
Speaker 4: and my brother was like, you should go see it.
Speaker 4: But I was very anti authrority because I went to
Speaker 4: the stereotypes but you see in movies and TV shows,
Speaker 4: So I didn't really know that there was more to
Speaker 4: it out there because I didn't do my research, and
Speaker 4: so I met the fives on chapter here at UH
Speaker 4: and I just loved how authentic and how warm and
Speaker 4: welcoming they were, and same to Trinity, like they were
Speaker 4: always doing service, always doing community service, especially mental health,
Speaker 4: which is part of my major. And so I was like,
Speaker 4: this is very like calling to me. And there was
Speaker 4: just little things I noticed as I went researching in Zeta.
Speaker 4: I had some teachers that were Zeta, some of my
Speaker 4: favorite book authors are Zeta's and it just all felt
Speaker 4: very like a puzzle piece putting together. So that kind
Speaker 4: of drew me in, And once I learned more about Zata,
Speaker 4: I was like, Okay, yeah, this is right for me.
Speaker 3: I feel very homely here.
Speaker 1: Thank y'all for sharing those sweet sentiments. Tell me what
Speaker 1: do you love most about your story?
Speaker 4: I think for me, I love how they're all over
Speaker 4: the place. You can always see a soul war wherever
Speaker 4: you go. Even driving in Houston, I see so many
Speaker 4: data plates. And for people that also don't know, like
Speaker 4: you know, Zeta Phi Beta were constitutionally bound to another
Speaker 4: D nine frat, and that as another aspect of feeling
Speaker 4: like you're never alone, and it truly feels like that,
Speaker 4: like whenever I need help, I know there's.
Speaker 3: A solar around the corner that I can call.
Speaker 4: Even like in the grocery store, I see a soul
Speaker 4: war and we're just chatting it up, and I just
Speaker 4: feel like I always have a sense of community, and
Speaker 4: I know I do wherever I go in this world.
Speaker 4: So I think that's like my favorite part is just
Speaker 4: how everyone really takes the sisterhood and like brotherhood to heart.
Speaker 7: Not to sound cheesy or cliche, but what I found
Speaker 7: to know about Delta Sigma Theta is that we truly
Speaker 7: impact the world. We shift the culture, and we are
Speaker 7: the starter of conversations. I remember when I first crossed,
Speaker 7: I met sore Readabauers, who currently is a representative in Texas,
Speaker 7: and she is pounding the pavement for the Crown Act
Speaker 7: in Texas, and I said, oh my gosh, we are
Speaker 7: now sores, but I actually see someone who is impacting
Speaker 7: not only the state, but trying to change the country
Speaker 7: in terms of natural hair, workplaces and just really making
Speaker 7: a space for black men and women to express themselves
Speaker 7: that way. So I was like, Wow, we really are
Speaker 7: the starter of conversations, and we're also everywhere, So that's
Speaker 7: really cool too. What I love the.
Speaker 5: Most about Sigma Gammarroe Swart Incorporated, honestly is my sore ers.
Speaker 5: And I say that because prior to coming to college,
Speaker 5: I really didn't have a role model, and so meeting
Speaker 5: different sores from across the world has given me a
Speaker 5: perspective of I can go far, I can be whoever
Speaker 5: I desire to be, and they encouraged me to be
Speaker 5: fierce and fearless in my.
Speaker 3: Pursuit of grater.
Speaker 5: So I love just meeting them, but also knowing like
Speaker 5: to me, then no matter where I go, I have
Speaker 5: a community, and also seeing them inspire women like me
Speaker 5: but also younger girls to be their best selves. You know,
Speaker 5: they always encourage us to grow and.
Speaker 6: I love it so for me, it really is like
Speaker 6: the true sisterhood. We have this saying and we say
Speaker 6: like we help each other for we know there's no other.
Speaker 6: And I truly have felt that during my time as
Speaker 6: a member of outfigat that AUFS already incorporated. Most of
Speaker 6: my mentors are sores, and not even intentionally, but I
Speaker 6: just met them in life and they happen to be
Speaker 6: sores and the way they've helped me me not even
Speaker 6: knowing them that well. But even after a week of
Speaker 6: me being able to get to know them and I
Speaker 6: call them I need something, they're right there. And it's
Speaker 6: just so amazing to know that wherever I go, they're
Speaker 6: going to be sores who are like to help. I
Speaker 6: think we can't do this life journey alone and to
Speaker 6: have those sisters across the world.
Speaker 3: It just means so much to me.
Speaker 1: I completely agree with all of your statements. I find
Speaker 1: myself relating to each and every one of you just
Speaker 1: to summarize it for myself. But Ryan, you touched on
Speaker 1: this earlier, but I would love to hear from those
Speaker 1: of you who have D nine parents and family members
Speaker 1: and how do they influence your decision to join your organization.
Speaker 6: So my mom did not influence me at all. Like
Speaker 6: my mom was always like, you're going to do what
Speaker 6: you want to do, and if you want to do it,
Speaker 6: then you're gonna have to work hard.
Speaker 7: And do it.
Speaker 6: So I think that's something that like honestly pushed me
Speaker 6: to join more because it was like, oh my gosh,
Speaker 6: like I can make this decision for myself and really
Speaker 6: know that it's right for me. And yeah, and then
Speaker 6: my dad's also a member of Omega Sci Fi Fraternity Incorporated,
Speaker 6: and he also was just like, this is your own journey,
Speaker 6: Like I'm here to help you in any way that
Speaker 6: I can, but the end of the day, it's your
Speaker 6: decision and it's something that you're going to have to
Speaker 6: stick to for life, so you just need to make
Speaker 6: it on your own.
Speaker 1: Thank you for sharing that, Ryan, I relate in a
Speaker 1: similar sense. My aunt was in the same tune. My
Speaker 1: Auntie is also a member of Delta, but she was
Speaker 1: very much focused on school, focus on the grades, focus
Speaker 1: on you, and whatever come will come. And that just
Speaker 1: pushed me even more of like, Okay, well yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: going to do this, and I really want to do this,
Speaker 1: but designing your own path and crafting your own path
Speaker 1: is like really important for me.
Speaker 3: So I completely relate to that.
Speaker 1: So for someone who isn't a part of Greek life,
Speaker 1: sometimes it could be a bit unclear what it entails.
Speaker 1: Can you explain some of the commitments that come with
Speaker 1: joining a southrority, Like I.
Speaker 4: Always get asked that at meeting Greece that we have
Speaker 4: for the fraternity's authorities, and it's always a question that
Speaker 4: people laugh because my face is always just like well,
Speaker 4: what do you want to know?
Speaker 3: Like, like, it's a lot that comes with it.
Speaker 4: It's not only yes, it's like, you know, you have
Speaker 4: to be in the chapter, and depending on like the chapter,
Speaker 4: you're gonna have to have a leadership position.
Speaker 3: My chapter is small right now.
Speaker 4: We only have four people, and when I came in,
Speaker 4: there was only two people left because some people graduated.
Speaker 3: So I immediately had a leadership role.
Speaker 4: It wasn't like I got to be a member for
Speaker 4: a year feel the waters. You know, I had to
Speaker 4: go straight into it. And so you like have that
Speaker 4: leadership experience. You have to know that not only that
Speaker 4: leadership experience, you're also going to have to host events,
Speaker 4: go out meet people, be social. And not only that,
Speaker 4: it also entails with a lot of time management and
Speaker 4: like learning how to prioritize your life because not only
Speaker 4: do you have your Greek life, you have your personal life,
Speaker 4: you have school and then like for example, for people
Speaker 4: like us, we have like our side households are like
Speaker 4: content creator, our endeavors.
Speaker 3: So it entails like a lot of.
Speaker 4: Stacking up different life aspects and understanding how to handle it.
Speaker 4: It's hard at first, I will say surprise, I didn't
Speaker 4: know what busy was until now, but it's doable, but
Speaker 4: it is, it's busy.
Speaker 6: I think the biggest thing is just bouncing off of
Speaker 6: what you said.
Speaker 7: Definitely balance.
Speaker 6: This is our service work and like our primary service work,
Speaker 6: but you still have to have a career.
Speaker 3: You still have to have a life for like.
Speaker 7: Everything else you're doing.
Speaker 6: And so I think that's the biggest thing I learned,
Speaker 6: was like balance, and then also.
Speaker 3: Just service work. You have to be ready to do
Speaker 3: the work.
Speaker 6: Just even today I did an event at one of
Speaker 6: the local elementary schools. We did a book drive, so
Speaker 6: we like dropped off the books and then made friendship
Speaker 6: bracelets with some of the students there. And then right
Speaker 6: after that we went to another school to do a
Speaker 6: step and stroll performance for another service opportunity. It's definitely
Speaker 6: a lot of service work, and it's also just like
Speaker 6: you have to be sisterly because at the end of
Speaker 6: the day, it is a sisterhood and you have to
Speaker 6: be ready to make sacrifices for some of your sisters
Speaker 6: at times as well.
Speaker 5: For me, I understand sometimes we talk about the commitment
Speaker 5: and coding time, financial commitment, but one of the commitments
Speaker 5: I realize gets overlooked is the commitment to selflessness when
Speaker 5: you're joining a d NOT organization. And I'll speak specifically
Speaker 5: for my organization. Of course, our principles are our sisterhood, scholarship,
Speaker 5: and service, and so that sense of selflessness comes in
Speaker 5: when you're willing to give your time, your energy, and
Speaker 5: your love to truly see a difference be made in
Speaker 5: the community. So for me, I've learned that the greatest
Speaker 5: commitment I've had to make is to my growth, but
Speaker 5: also to being willing to understand that what I do now,
Speaker 5: the seeds I sew now and that I water are
Speaker 5: going to benefit the organization later, but most importantly, it's
Speaker 5: going to benefit the world and the community long.
Speaker 3: Term as well.
Speaker 5: So that's something I would say, remember that when you're
Speaker 5: joining the d NOT organization, it's not just a commitment
Speaker 5: to the organization, it's a commitment to furthering the mission
Speaker 5: and the values of the organization as well.
Speaker 3: On behalf of the community preach.
Speaker 7: For sure, I'm going to piggyback on everyone because they
Speaker 7: have literally told y'all everything. One of the commitments that
Speaker 7: I really really learned while an undergrad was not only
Speaker 7: the commitment to your sorority, but also the commitment to
Speaker 7: your university. And that is a huge umbrella. That could
Speaker 7: be community service work. Of course, your grades, because you
Speaker 7: are there to get a degree. Get your degree, okay, period,
Speaker 7: we graduately over here, your great service work, but also
Speaker 7: how you impact your campus. I think a lot of
Speaker 7: people don't really think about that. There are people really
Speaker 7: looking up to you and watching you to see what
Speaker 7: you are going to do. So that's really interesting. And
Speaker 7: it also like the biggest commitment I learned was really
Speaker 7: mental health, which I applaud Delta Sigma Beta Sorority for
Speaker 7: really emphasizing mental health. You really have to keep your
Speaker 7: mental health in check, especially in authority, because that impacts
Speaker 7: how sisterly you are to your other members, That impacts
Speaker 7: your school work, that impacts if you're in a leadership position,
Speaker 7: can you handle it because your sorority business still has
Speaker 7: to go on. So yeah, that's what I learned.
Speaker 1: So to recap there's no one size fits all for
Speaker 1: a commitment with a sorority basically, so I know for me,
Speaker 1: similar to some of you, my perceptions of Greek life
Speaker 1: was through the entertainment industry through family conversation, and my
Speaker 1: perception was not the reality. And so what were your
Speaker 1: initial perceptions before joining the sorority and how did those
Speaker 1: perceptions change after you became a member.
Speaker 5: Honestly, initially, like I said earlier, I joined my organization
Speaker 5: not only because of the commitment to education, but also
Speaker 5: because I vowed their approach to sisterhood and service. So
Speaker 5: going in, I'm thinking, Okay, we're about to do community service,
Speaker 5: have these sister bondings. And when I tell y'all, these
Speaker 5: women challenge my ego. They challenged my ego, and so
Speaker 5: my whole perception of Greek life was completely shattered in
Speaker 5: a beautiful way because I went in thinking like, Okay,
Speaker 5: I'm just gonna give back, have a good time, and
Speaker 5: really make a difference. In reality, I was way more
Speaker 5: impacted spiritually, emotionally, mentally, professionally on all levels than I
Speaker 5: ever could have dreamed of. So at the time in
Speaker 5: undergrad I had those mental health days, I had those
Speaker 5: moments where like it was a lot, But I'm so
Speaker 5: grateful that they challenged me in that way because I
Speaker 5: realized the sisterhood is not just about what you give,
Speaker 5: but what you're open to receiving as well.
Speaker 7: My initial perception, honestly, I saw Delta through the lens
Speaker 7: of older soars, not really younger sorees. So when I
Speaker 7: was initiated, it was just like, Okay, I'm glad I
Speaker 7: made it to the other side, but what does this
Speaker 7: look like in terms of a collegiate instead of alumni member?
Speaker 7: And so I knew that we did social action, we
Speaker 7: did work on the community and things like that, but
Speaker 7: I didn't know about the business side and what that
Speaker 7: looks like as a leader within your chapter. So I definitely, definitely,
Speaker 7: definitely have to check my ego, Like that was a
Speaker 7: huge thing. You have to be teachable to be impactful,
Speaker 7: but having to learn about not only being a student
Speaker 7: but also being like a business woman in some aspects.
Speaker 7: So I think that's a huge thing that most people
Speaker 7: do not know, is that you have to put on
Speaker 7: that business had you have to learn on the curve.
Speaker 6: Yeah, So I think I saw like all these women
Speaker 6: and I was inspired by their grace and like how
Speaker 6: they moved through the world even though they were.
Speaker 3: Doing all of these things.
Speaker 6: Like I don't know if y'all know that TikTok, but
Speaker 6: she gives money, she's super pretty, her body, tea like
Speaker 6: that was all of it, and that inspired me, and
Speaker 6: I was like, oh my gosh, they are like really
Speaker 6: doing it. But I think I was a little bit
Speaker 6: shocked by the work. And I always knew I wanted
Speaker 6: to work because I knew it was gonna be a
Speaker 6: lot of work. But like really learning that the work
Speaker 6: of an alpha woman is like truly never done, and
Speaker 6: like understanding that from learning from my big sisters and
Speaker 6: like just like people who inspired me to be in
Speaker 6: the sorority in the first place, was just a big
Speaker 6: deal for me, and it really just taught me how
Speaker 6: to move through the world in a better place.
Speaker 3: I would say.
Speaker 4: With me, I kind of expected like the work, I
Speaker 4: guess because I saw how much work my brother put
Speaker 4: into his Greek life, and I was like, okay, like
Speaker 4: there is work, there's chapter work. I understand that part.
Speaker 4: I understood the business side because incorporated know your business.
Speaker 4: You're running a business and you must act as such.
Speaker 4: So I understood that, Okay, these are like business women.
Speaker 4: These women are here to further the progression of their
Speaker 4: sorority and their chapters. What I didn't expect was having
Speaker 4: to put myself out there the way I did. I
Speaker 4: guess socially physically, I didn't really know what strolling was.
Speaker 4: I didn't know about it.
Speaker 3: I didn't know what it meant.
Speaker 4: And so when we had like our first practice, they're like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 4: we're gonna stroll.
Speaker 3: Like at a hump knight.
Speaker 7: Like what is that?
Speaker 4: I never went to any of the D nine Greek
Speaker 4: stuff on my campus before becoming a zeta, So little
Speaker 4: did I know that I would have to be doing
Speaker 4: these strolls or front of all these people with their
Speaker 4: cameras flashing on me.
Speaker 3: Did not expect that.
Speaker 4: Did not expect to have to like find that new
Speaker 4: source of confidence because I don't dance in front of people,
Speaker 4: you know, I'm Nigerian. Love to dance comfort on my
Speaker 4: own home, never done in front of people.
Speaker 3: So I did.
Speaker 4: Not expect to have to dig deep in within myself
Speaker 4: and find a new source of confidence. Because I can
Speaker 4: be camfident in speaking of presentation, but to be confident
Speaker 4: to speak in front of a whole bunch of students,
Speaker 4: to always be on ten, always talk about yourself, having
Speaker 4: to stroll do step presentations, that's a whole new type
Speaker 4: of confidence that I did not have. But with the
Speaker 4: care and attention of my sores, I will say that
Speaker 4: they did help me find that confidence. It took a while,
Speaker 4: but they definitely nurtured that and saw that within me
Speaker 4: and definitely took it as a learning and a growth
Speaker 4: mindset that they can help me find a new confidence
Speaker 4: and a new side of being that I didn't tap
Speaker 4: into before.
Speaker 1: And off of that point to me, like shout out
Speaker 1: to the collegiate advisors that push all the undergrads in
Speaker 1: that confidence and pushing us to be confident. That was
Speaker 1: another thing that I didn't realize before joining that I
Speaker 1: would have to unlock a different side of being confident.
Speaker 1: So shout out to all the advisors who are challenging
Speaker 1: us every day to be more confident in our skin.
Speaker 2: Hi, I'm sorrya Taylor, and I'm the TBG podcast production intern.
Speaker 2: We'll return to Jana right after the break.
Speaker 1: What are some misconceptions about joining authority that you want
Speaker 1: to dispel?
Speaker 4: There's so many, but many I'm gonna say, Like, I
Speaker 4: guess a stereotype that I always hear from people is
Speaker 4: like we're all very like standoffish or like very like snobby,
Speaker 4: if that makes sense. I understand like this is a
Speaker 4: very privileged position to be in. Y'all pay dues. That's expensive.
Speaker 4: It's financially privileging, it's socially privileging. You know, you don't
Speaker 4: have to have the time, the money, and you get
Speaker 4: the connections and stuff like that. But I feel like
Speaker 4: people think that we're paying for friends and we're paying
Speaker 4: to be a part of this elite group. And I
Speaker 4: say elite with quotation marks because it's not that. And
Speaker 4: I feel like people don't take the time to actually
Speaker 4: see past the Greek stereotypes that like, oh, all you
Speaker 4: guys do is like party, go out and be social,
Speaker 4: the drinking stereotypes. I hate those because that kind of
Speaker 4: negates all the service work that I know all of
Speaker 4: our org do, Like we all do a lot of service,
Speaker 4: and for that stereotype for us to be like these uptight,
Speaker 4: like snobby people, like this elite people, it kind of
Speaker 4: negates all that service and all that work that we
Speaker 4: ourselves know that we're not like those people that people
Speaker 4: stereotype us as, and it makes it harder. Also, I
Speaker 4: feel like to be a person in a Greek or
Speaker 4: because once you say like, oh, I'm part of this org.
Speaker 4: Everyone in their mama has a whole with the stereotypes
Speaker 4: about like, oh, you're part of that org, I know
Speaker 4: how you act, or you're part of that org.
Speaker 3: Oh I know how you speak.
Speaker 4: It's like, no, you don't because without the letters, with
Speaker 4: the letters, I'm still the same person.
Speaker 3: I just so happen to wear.
Speaker 5: These letters in these colors I agree with. To me,
Speaker 5: I was going to go into the stereotypes as well.
Speaker 5: I believe a lot of the misconceptions that I dislike
Speaker 5: that I wish we could just completely eliminate are the
Speaker 5: ones that revolve around how people perceive you based off
Speaker 5: which organization you're in. So if you say you're a
Speaker 5: Sigma woman, a Delta woman, a Zta woman, or an
Speaker 5: Alpha woman, people instantly have this idea of how you think,
Speaker 5: how you move, how you cook, even how you navigate
Speaker 5: life and your relationships. But the reality of it is,
Speaker 5: you cannot generalize us based off our organizations.
Speaker 3: If anything, that.
Speaker 5: Should inspire you to get to know us about our
Speaker 5: values and our morals better. Other people's perceptions of your
Speaker 5: organizations are not a reflection of you as a whole.
Speaker 3: You are a major part of how.
Speaker 5: Your organization can function and move, so your unique contribution
Speaker 5: matters to the organization. So just because I'm a Sigma
Speaker 5: woman and you may not think I look like a
Speaker 5: Sigma woman does not mean I'm not valuable and does
Speaker 5: not mean my sorority isn't beyond your steer types and
Speaker 5: your negative perception snaps all around.
Speaker 1: Thank y'all for sharing those points. So moving on, Felicia,
Speaker 1: I know you became a member of Sigma Gamma ro
Speaker 1: Story incorporate during COVID nineteen and join when there is
Speaker 1: zero members on your campus. Can you talk a little
Speaker 1: bit about that experience?
Speaker 5: Honestly, I recently just had to talk about this because
Speaker 5: someone asked me how did I know if I was resilient?
Speaker 5: And I always think back to how I was able
Speaker 5: to navigate the intake process in an accelerated process, so
Speaker 5: meaning that it was completely shorter and faster than the
Speaker 5: average process while also during quarantine or post quarantine per se.
Speaker 5: It's honestly one of my greatest accomplishments, mainly because through
Speaker 5: everything I went through with my mental health during COVID,
Speaker 5: I did not think I would be strong enough to
Speaker 5: embark on the journey, let alone to come out on
Speaker 5: the other side, and so to hit the stage on
Speaker 5: probate day or on show day, and then to be
Speaker 5: able to be selected as president a week later, it
Speaker 5: was a major torch to bear. But now that I
Speaker 5: look back and I see my chapter and how much
Speaker 5: they've grown, and I see them post events and all
Speaker 5: these big things, it is a reflection.
Speaker 7: That I'm capable.
Speaker 3: So I will not tell you it was easy.
Speaker 5: It is top three hardest things I've ever done in
Speaker 5: my twenty two years of living. But it's one of
Speaker 5: my most prideful accomplishments because I've built the foundation for
Speaker 5: the Omicron chapter to grow, and I'll always be grateful
Speaker 5: I could do that for my chapter in my school.
Speaker 1: That's amazing. Thank you for walking us through that. To me,
Speaker 1: you attended the University of Houston, which is a PWY.
Speaker 1: How does your chapter impact this space as a Black
Speaker 1: Greek letter organization.
Speaker 3: I would say it's a lot of putting yourself.
Speaker 4: Out there because especially like our PWY, it's in like
Speaker 4: the heart of downtown Houston, so it's near Third Ward
Speaker 4: and anyone from Texas knows like is a black majority.
Speaker 3: Space, but UH is really diverse.
Speaker 4: And when it comes to that, you do have to
Speaker 4: struggle with sharing the limelight and sharing it with the
Speaker 4: other Paneltic and IFC and MGC councils. And I feel like,
Speaker 4: as like a Black Greek Letter org on a PWY,
Speaker 4: it's a lot of putting ourselves out there and having
Speaker 4: to raise our own standard and be above the standard,
Speaker 4: especially because we have small chapters here like PWI Multicultural
Speaker 4: or even like Black Greekletter or chapters. They're small because
Speaker 4: the school is not catered to that culture. And because
Speaker 4: it's not catered to that culture, we have to be
Speaker 4: the culture and bring the culture to the campus and
Speaker 4: make sure that it's instilled how it should be instilled,
Speaker 4: making sure that people understand and respect like our orgs
Speaker 4: and don't see us as some afterthought, if that makes sense.
Speaker 3: And I feel like with pwy's is just very.
Speaker 4: Much of a struggle bus to have people see us
Speaker 4: even as like our MPAC, like MYNPAC. I can applaud
Speaker 4: them so much because even this past school year we've
Speaker 4: grown so much in outreach and getting people to notice it,
Speaker 4: like hey, we're here, because.
Speaker 3: I get told a lot of the times like oh
Speaker 3: you're a Zeta. Yeah, I'm a zeta.
Speaker 4: They're like, I didn't know there was even black grief
Speaker 4: oors on this campus. And that's crazy because I know
Speaker 4: we all wear our letters on this campus of the time.
Speaker 4: I know our yard is big. But because our school
Speaker 4: doesn't push us out the way and HPCU would push
Speaker 4: out a black Greek letter orgs, we have to try
Speaker 4: ten times. It's hard to be seen and it can
Speaker 4: be like a bit discouraging, but at the same time
Speaker 4: it helps to find people that want to have that
Speaker 4: community and want to really be connected with, like the
Speaker 4: black culture at UH, and it's very beautiful when you
Speaker 4: see it, like hump Nights. You just see like all
Speaker 4: the black curacius come out and support because they know
Speaker 4: the opportunities here aren't the same as for their counterpart
Speaker 4: who isn't black.
Speaker 1: Thank you for sharing that, Ryan, what has been the
Speaker 1: most rewarding aspect of your experience in chapter and how
Speaker 1: has it contributed to your personal growth and sense of community.
Speaker 6: I would say that the vine never stops growing. It's
Speaker 6: been so important to like my matriculation through school and
Speaker 6: also just my womanhood, just being able to have so
Speaker 6: many sisters to lean on across the spectrum in terms
Speaker 6: of like my family members who are sores, but also
Speaker 6: just random people I meet on the daily who are
Speaker 6: sores and I'm like, Hi, how are you like introducing
Speaker 6: myself and also just finding out more about them. I
Speaker 6: think it's just a really beautiful experience to move through
Speaker 6: the world knowing that I represent this beautiful organization that
Speaker 6: has so many members who are all committed to these
Speaker 6: values into growing the sisterhood. And also just I crossed
Speaker 6: Spring twenty two and we just had another line. And
Speaker 6: so just seeing how I was able to build relationships
Speaker 6: with like my nails and just continue developing relationships through
Speaker 6: my entire like in my future life as like a
Speaker 6: member for life. I think that's just going to be
Speaker 6: so beautiful. It's one of my favorite parts.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 1: And Trinity for a little moment of reflection, how do
Speaker 1: you navigate some of the age slash generational differences with
Speaker 1: your order soares whom you lead alongside?
Speaker 7: So I would like to preface this whole answer by saying,
Speaker 7: I grew up with nothing but Theason people. So I
Speaker 7: maybe twenty two may look like a kid, but my
Speaker 7: soul I am a good sixty five years old. Okay,
Speaker 7: I would just like to put that out there. I
Speaker 7: have an easier time navigating that area compared to some
Speaker 7: of my other sores. But I think communication is key
Speaker 7: and understanding. I think one of the biggest life lessons
Speaker 7: that I've always had is being teachable. They've been with
Speaker 7: Delta way longer than me, so they have insight and
Speaker 7: knowledge that I am growing into. So I always have
Speaker 7: a listening gear on. Now when some of those opinions
Speaker 7: or ways of conducting business may be just each bit dated,
Speaker 7: that's when I come in and say, hey, sore, well
Speaker 7: at the University of North Texas or even here in Providence,
Speaker 7: I've learned these new things that can make life easier
Speaker 7: for us. Let me just walk you through it so
Speaker 7: you can see it and let me know your opinions
Speaker 7: and your insight. And I always try to find a
Speaker 7: middle ground. But I'm normally able to find a middle
Speaker 7: ground just because my soul I'm very old, so I
Speaker 7: understand where they're coming from. And also I get respect
Speaker 7: because I actually have a listening ear, if that makes sense.
Speaker 7: I know that's one of the things that they talk
Speaker 7: about a lot with younger sores is Hey, they don't
Speaker 7: want to listen. They just think they know it all.
Speaker 7: But when you sit and listen to them and say, hey,
Speaker 7: like I hear you, I understand you. But this way
Speaker 7: may be a little bit easier. We're normally able to
Speaker 7: come to a middle ground.
Speaker 1: I love the strategies of communication there. It's amazing. I
Speaker 1: definitely relate with the older soul and that's an art
Speaker 1: within itself of having that.
Speaker 2: Hi, I'm sorry, Taylor, and I'm the TPG podcast production intern.
Speaker 2: We'll return to Jana right after the break.
Speaker 1: To me. Can you recall when you how to navigate
Speaker 1: conflict with the Sore War? How did you go about
Speaker 1: it and what did you learn?
Speaker 4: I feel like when it comes like conflict with the
Speaker 4: Soro War, it's inevitable. It's a lot of personalities in
Speaker 4: one or and at the end of the day, we're
Speaker 4: all human. You're not gonna get along with everyone, and
Speaker 4: even if you do, a sisterhood is just like any
Speaker 4: other relationship in your life.
Speaker 3: You're gonna have your downs.
Speaker 4: You're gonna have the moments where your guys are butting heads.
Speaker 4: You're gonna have the moments where you guys aren't getting
Speaker 4: along or where you might not see eye to eye
Speaker 4: and especially because like we talk about this in the
Speaker 4: business aspect, maybe you guys just aren't good at working
Speaker 4: in a business setting. You're great at the sisterhood, but
Speaker 4: the business setting you're not. And I can recall a time,
Speaker 4: like I know there's spend times where like I would
Speaker 4: butt heads of my own mind sisters.
Speaker 3: But something that.
Speaker 4: Has helped me because especially I don't have sisters, I
Speaker 4: don't have a brother, So growing up I had a
Speaker 4: different tactic of handling arguments and it was very much
Speaker 4: the brotherly way of I'll hit you because that's the
Speaker 4: only way I know because growing up the brother that's
Speaker 4: a different type of dynamic than handling conflict with a
Speaker 4: soul with a sister. And something I learned is it's
Speaker 4: kind of like threefold is understanding. You need to listen
Speaker 4: and understand from their point of view and also have
Speaker 4: like empathy and know that they're so human and you're
Speaker 4: so human, and not to put people on this like
Speaker 4: pedestal of we're in this or we should be better
Speaker 4: than that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but like we all have our flaws, we all
Speaker 3: have our.
Speaker 4: Weaknesses, the things that we still need to work on.
Speaker 4: And sometimes you're gonna but head. Sometimes you're going to
Speaker 4: not understand someone, and sometimes that conflict may lead to
Speaker 4: maybe you guys don't talk anymore, maybe things just don't
Speaker 4: feel like the same.
Speaker 3: But I think something else I learned.
Speaker 4: Is that time heals, and you have the time, and
Speaker 4: you have the time to cool off. Maybe you guys
Speaker 4: just need to be in your own separate lives for
Speaker 4: a bit. At the end of the day, you're still
Speaker 4: sisters and you still are going to respect that person
Speaker 4: as a solar, and just know that maybe not tomorrow,
Speaker 4: maybe not next week, you guys will come back together
Speaker 4: and men that sisterhood.
Speaker 3: Conflict.
Speaker 4: Like I said, it's inevitable, it's going to happen, But
Speaker 4: it's how you handle it is the real kicker on
Speaker 4: whether this can go really bad or really good. And
Speaker 4: then also depending on if it goes really bad orally good,
Speaker 4: how you handle it. Further than that, communication styles, talking
Speaker 4: with them, listening to them, how you respond to what
Speaker 4: they say, things like that. It all ties into conflict resolution,
Speaker 4: which is something that should also be noted before going
Speaker 4: to a D nine. It's like, you're going to have
Speaker 4: to learn conflict resolution fast and quick because it's going
Speaker 4: to happen and you can't avoid it.
Speaker 3: You just have to use it as a learning curve
Speaker 3: with it for the next time that ever happens.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I definitely agree. I think going back to the
Speaker 1: point of being teachable, being open to learning conflict resolution
Speaker 1: and other communication styles is my number one tip honestly,
Speaker 1: and being flexible with different communication styles is the best
Speaker 1: way that I've learned how to navigate conflict in a
Speaker 1: sority and just in my life in general. So, Ryan
Speaker 1: and Valicia, I have a question for y'all, what does
Speaker 1: sisterhood mean to you and how do you show up.
Speaker 2: As a sister?
Speaker 5: For me, sisterhood is sacred and I say this a lot,
Speaker 5: but sisterhood is sacred because the type of bond and
Speaker 5: love you develop with other women, especially women who look
Speaker 5: like you and have similar values, principles and goals, is prices. So,
Speaker 5: whether you're having a hard time in life or you're
Speaker 5: on a mountain a conquering your greatest dream, having a
Speaker 5: sisterhood you can lean on, but also having people who
Speaker 5: hold you accountable is the greatest blessing because we walk
Speaker 5: through life in these individual journeys with these unique stories
Speaker 5: and being able to have people you can relate to
Speaker 5: is honestly healing in so many forms and ways. So
Speaker 5: I show up as a sister by always being there
Speaker 5: to remind my sorrows and other women around me to believe.
Speaker 3: Believe in yourself, believe in your.
Speaker 5: Abilities, know that who you are is needed in the world,
Speaker 5: is ready to receive you just as you are. And
Speaker 5: so always reminding myself to be love, to show love,
Speaker 5: and to be open to receiving love has strengthened every
Speaker 5: sisterhood I have, every friendship I have. So yeah, sisterhood
Speaker 5: is sacred and never take the women in your life
Speaker 5: for granted, because you all will go further together if
Speaker 5: you believe in yourselves and each other.
Speaker 6: I could not agree more. I grew up with two sisters,
Speaker 6: so sisterhood is truly essential to my being. I think
Speaker 6: it really crafts the way I move through this world,
Speaker 6: just trying to be as much of a sister to
Speaker 6: everyone I encounter, like really truly believing that like your
Speaker 6: interactions with women truly can change the world. That is
Speaker 6: one of the models of Actually my school is like
Speaker 6: a choice to change the world to like navigating sisterhoods
Speaker 6: like a familial value, but also as a value to
Speaker 6: have professionally can be really powerful to women in the workspace,
Speaker 6: which I think is amazing and I think it truly
Speaker 6: is something that can help all women across the.
Speaker 1: World lovely and to me in Trinity. How have you
Speaker 1: balanced your mental health with your sorority responsibilities.
Speaker 4: Prior to Zeta, I did have my bowl to struggle
Speaker 4: with depression anxiety, and I knew going into this that
Speaker 4: I would need to be very disciplined and also be
Speaker 4: very accountable of myself and also just know what I
Speaker 4: can and can't handle and not bite off more than
Speaker 4: we can chew, because yes, we're in these great orgs,
Speaker 4: but at the same time, we're not superheroes. We're not
Speaker 4: super beings that we can handle everything, we can take everything,
Speaker 4: and like we have our burnouts, we have our moments.
Speaker 4: And I will say, with me, like balancing my Zeta
Speaker 4: life and then personal life and then also still trying
Speaker 4: to make sure that my mental health is intact. I
Speaker 4: give myself grace will I try to still working on it,
Speaker 4: but I make a conscious effort every day to give
Speaker 4: myself grace. If I'm feeling super burnt out, I may
Speaker 4: just not go to that party. I may just not
Speaker 4: go to that home night. I may just not go
Speaker 4: to that social If I know that my sisters have
Speaker 4: my back, I'm always open to communication. Also, I'll tell
Speaker 4: them like, hey, guys, today's is not a day. I
Speaker 4: just really can't handle anything more. I have this test
Speaker 4: coming up, I haven't finished this homework, I need to
Speaker 4: do this project, and this will be my only free night.
Speaker 4: Can you guys go instead of me? And especially as
Speaker 4: a president of the chapter, I definitely have to make
Speaker 4: sure that I am giving myself space to breathe, because
Speaker 4: you can get lost in the Greek sphere and you
Speaker 4: can get lost in all it entails and you can
Speaker 4: forget to have that self care night, journal, meditate, go
Speaker 4: to therapy. These are all the things that especially our org,
Speaker 4: the Service for Mental Health, and to make sure that
Speaker 4: we are good as a whole person away. One of
Speaker 4: my alumni told me is that if you're not okay,
Speaker 4: then Zaya isn't okay.
Speaker 3: And I feel like that applies to all of our orgs.
Speaker 3: If you're not okay, then how.
Speaker 4: Do you expect to continue to do the great work
Speaker 4: that you were put in this org to do. You
Speaker 4: got to take care of yourself first, and it's not selfish.
Speaker 4: I think goes back to what Malicia said is like
Speaker 4: very much selflessness in order to make sure that you're
Speaker 4: okay so you can be there and be okay for others.
Speaker 7: Yes, she is like on point, I'm gonna piggyback community. Community, community.
Speaker 7: I cannot emphasize enough how much my community played a
Speaker 7: huge role in my mental health, balancing mental health with
Speaker 7: my sorority responsibilities. My parents, my family. Of course they
Speaker 7: give you like advice on what they would do if
Speaker 7: they're in your shoes, but you know, you listen to you,
Speaker 7: You're like, but y'all don't understand.
Speaker 3: Y'all don't get it.
Speaker 7: So that's where my chapter advices came in, Like so
Speaker 7: or Sneets or Green or Derek. My advisors were really
Speaker 7: on me, like, Trinity, go to bed. Why are you
Speaker 7: sending emails at midnight when am go to sleep? Like
Speaker 7: it will be here the next day where you can
Speaker 7: handle that. Did you eat? Did you like just go
Speaker 7: outside outside of all your responsibilities? So I had like
Speaker 7: an internal community on my campus outside of my family,
Speaker 7: but also really like I'm faith based, so going to
Speaker 7: church and praying and meditating and just having anywhere from
Speaker 7: thirty minutes to an hour of my morning just sitting
Speaker 7: there to WUSA. Because I'm one of those people where
Speaker 7: when I start, I do not stop. I am very
Speaker 7: self motivated, self driven. I'm going to get to my
Speaker 7: go whether it means I'm limping across the finish line
Speaker 7: or crawling across the finish line, I'm going to get there.
Speaker 7: So really slowing myself down and relying on my community
Speaker 7: to keep me on track. Of Hey, that goal will
Speaker 7: not be feasible if you can't talk because you've talked
Speaker 7: so much today, or if you're injured or things like that.
Speaker 7: So my community really really helped me balance my mental
Speaker 7: health with my sorority responsibilities.
Speaker 1: For sure, I love and I completely agree going back
Speaker 1: to my chapter advisors credible women and without them, I yeah,
Speaker 1: without them, long story might not have made it to
Speaker 1: graduation some days. So just I completely agree with the
Speaker 1: both of you. Thank you all for sharing those sentiments.
Speaker 1: I love this conversation. I'm curious where can we keep
Speaker 1: up with you? What are your social media handles?
Speaker 4: You all can find me on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, even Pinterest.
Speaker 4: I knows people don't use Pinterest, but it's great. You
Speaker 4: all should get on it. It's going to be at to
Speaker 4: me a day as you say to you, am, I
Speaker 4: underscore A d E y o j u. I make
Speaker 4: a whole bunch of like self love, lifestyle, fashion, beauty content,
Speaker 4: so find me there.
Speaker 7: So I recently moved from Dallas to Providence, so I'm
Speaker 7: still trying to get my life together. But right now,
Speaker 7: you can follow me on Instagram at trend the Scholar,
Speaker 7: on LinkedIn Trinity Perkins. Yeah, let's let's connect, let's network.
Speaker 5: You can follow me on Instagram at Valisia Rose so
Speaker 5: that's v A l E s h A r O
Speaker 5: s E. You can also add you on LinkedIn as well,
Speaker 5: because you know, we keep a professional at Valisia Rhodes
Speaker 5: and I also have a podcast called The Venusian Vault,
Speaker 5: so feel free to follow me on all platforms and
Speaker 5: tune in about self, love, sisterhood, and spirituality period.
Speaker 6: You can follow me on Instagram and TikTok at Ryan
Speaker 6: R y A and N dot C brook S E
Speaker 6: A B r O Ok.
Speaker 1: Well again, thank you all so much for talking with me.
Speaker 1: I loved our sisterhood comnversation today.
Speaker 3: Thank you so much, Thank you.
Speaker 1: I want to thank Ryan to Me, Balicia, and Trinity
Speaker 1: once again for joining us for this episode. Classes over
Speaker 1: for now, but before we dismiss, take the following affirmations
Speaker 1: from my conversation home with you. I am surrounded by
Speaker 1: sisters who uplift and support me in all aspects of
Speaker 1: my life. I am a reflection of a strong legacy
Speaker 1: of black sisterhood within my community. I am deserving of
Speaker 1: the sisterhood, mentorship and lifelong connections that are ahead of me.
Speaker 1: To learn more about the work Ryan to Me, Balicia
Speaker 1: and Trinity are doing, or to do more research on
Speaker 1: this topic, be sure to visit Therapy for Black Girls
Speaker 1: dot com, slash stvgu. This episode was produced by Frida Lucas,
Speaker 1: Elise Ellis, and Zaria Taylor. Editing is by Dennison L.
Speaker 3: Bradford.