Speaker 1: I finally decided to propose to my vegan fiance. Do
Speaker 1: I go with one carrot or two?
Speaker 2: What's an English sea monster's favorite lunch? Fish and chips.
Speaker 1: I never understood why people wore black clothes when they
Speaker 1: want to be sneaky. They should wear leather armor because
Speaker 1: it's made of hide.
Speaker 2: I said to my wife, for the last fifteen years,
Speaker 2: all you've done is fine. Mistakes in anything I say?
Speaker 2: She said, sixteen years.
Speaker 1: Yesterday, a beautiful girl asked me if I wanted to
Speaker 1: watch a movie. She said, what movie would you like
Speaker 1: to see? I said, you pick? She said you pick.
Speaker 1: I said, I don't care you pick. She said, sir,
Speaker 1: there are people behind you waiting to buy tickets.
Speaker 2: What do you call a Mexican who hates protein powder?
Speaker 1: No way, Jose. My husband left me because of my
Speaker 1: gambling addiction, but I know I can win him.
Speaker 2: Beck, What do kids and farts have in common? We
Speaker 2: don't mind our own, but can't stand others.
Speaker 1: So I hear that you race cars? Do you win
Speaker 1: many races?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: The cars are much faster.
Speaker 2: My geography teacher asked me to name a country without
Speaker 2: the letter are in it? I said, no way, I'm
Speaker 2: Bob Jeffy.
Speaker 1: And I'm Montgomery Jones.
Speaker 2: Get ready for a bonus dad joke. We have a
Speaker 2: mission to bring joy and some cringes to the world,
Speaker 2: one joke at a time. Share the humor with your
Speaker 2: loved ones. Sleep well and I'll catch you tomorrow.
Speaker 1: Cheers. Looking for more dad joke humor to share, then
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Speaker 1: roundup of the best dad jokes, memes and humor for
Speaker 1: you to enjoy. Spread the laughs and groans and sign
Speaker 1: up today. Check the sign up link in the show
Speaker 1: notes page or visit dailydadjokespodcast dot com. The Daily Dad
Speaker 1: Jokes podcast is produced by Classic Studios. See the show
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Speaker 1: My daughter accused me of telling dad jokes. Nothing could
Speaker 1: be father from the truth.