Speaker 1: Welcome to Guys We Fucked. Guys We Guys we Booked.
Speaker 1: I'm Christina, I'm correct, We're sorry about last night the
Speaker 1: anti slut shaming podcast. I never stopped. Hey fucker's Welcome
Speaker 1: to another episode of Guys We Fucked. It's the anti
Speaker 1: slut shaming podcast. I'm Karin, I'm Christina, and today's episode
Speaker 1: is brought to you by Dirty Lemon. That's just not
Speaker 1: just what I call Stephen in the bedroom. It's also
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Speaker 1: about Dirty Lemon on Guys We Fun, they'll throw in
Speaker 1: an extra case of sleep for free in your first order.
Speaker 1: Do it. Karen and I both drink it, and it's
Speaker 1: fucking good. I mean, look at us we're doing. Look
Speaker 1: at how detox I am. It is good though, it
Speaker 1: is good. And shout out to the guy who tried
Speaker 1: to be explain what natural path he was, and I
Speaker 1: worked at a spa for a holistic spa for five
Speaker 1: fucking years, So thank you. I wish everyone could see
Speaker 1: Current's face. I was so irritated. I was like, I
Speaker 1: was like, I jam that's I was, like I said
Speaker 1: on the podcast that acupuncture saved my life. I think
Speaker 1: I know what woo woo doctor stuff is. That's what
Speaker 1: my dad calls it. Who woo? Yes, well that's the
Speaker 1: name for it. I always, I mean, on the streets,
Speaker 1: I always tell Kate, we'll give me some of that
Speaker 1: will woo. Yeah. Come see us live please Tonight March
Speaker 1: twenty four. It's Glamorous hosted by myself a Wenday Starling.
Speaker 1: The doors open at seven. If tickets are sold out,
Speaker 1: they might be. We do release ten door tickets a
Speaker 1: day of at seven pm shows at seven thirties Zinc Bar,
Speaker 1: eighty two West third Street in the West Village. Going
Speaker 1: to be a good time. And then on Wednesday, March
Speaker 1: at nine pm, it's another edition of The Comedian Project,
Speaker 1: co hosted by myself and Katie Hanna, again who you've
Speaker 1: heard on this podcast. It's at the Standing Room in
Speaker 1: Long Island City. Tickets or five dollars when you use
Speaker 1: the code word sex. But the show has no jokes
Speaker 1: about sex, stating our relationships and we have a good time.
Speaker 1: That doesn't mean it's a clean show. So you know,
Speaker 1: just know that we are doing a tour. We're doing
Speaker 1: We tour all the time. But these are the upcoming
Speaker 1: days we have for guys. We've sucked the experience which
Speaker 1: you can bring people who've never heard of the podcast before.
Speaker 1: They will have a good time, trust me. Boston Thursday, April.
Speaker 1: We're gonna be at the Wilbur Chickapee, Massachusetts. Friday April
Speaker 1: fourteenth at the Hooky Louck. I know it's not you know,
Speaker 1: you really don't want to go to Chickenpeep, but I'm
Speaker 1: telling you that's gonna be a fun place. The drinks
Speaker 1: are gonna have umbrellas. Yeah. Austin, Texas, April, we're gonna
Speaker 1: be a Moon Tower Comedy Festival. Individual ticket links they
Speaker 1: go on sale March seven. Okay, that's all I got
Speaker 1: for now, but we will be there. Save the date
Speaker 1: and the second that tickets be I'm available. We'll blasted
Speaker 1: owner social media. Houston, Texas On Sunday, April We're at
Speaker 1: the Warehouse Live. Remember last week when we're like, oh,
Speaker 1: that's almost sold out ll Houston, Texas. Yeah, wait, that's
Speaker 1: what we just said. Las Vegas, Nevada. Thursday, May eighteen
Speaker 1: to Saturday, we're gonna be doing the Crap Shoot Comedy
Speaker 1: Fest of All y'all Milwauk You, Wisconsin. Friday, June second,
Speaker 1: we're gonna be at the Past Theater, Chicago, Illinois. We're
Speaker 1: coming back Saturday June three. We're doing the fourth Annual
Speaker 1: Annual Comedy Festival. There's two shows when at seven pm,
Speaker 1: one at ten pm at the Tallya Hall. And that'll
Speaker 1: be fun. Yeah, takes, it'll be fun. Speaking of buying ship,
Speaker 1: some people preordered our book. We have a book that
Speaker 1: we are that is written and it's available for preorders,
Speaker 1: completely written, totally written. It in one word, everything is
Speaker 1: perfectly employed written. Now it's it's all written. And these
Speaker 1: people are people who pre ordered it and where what
Speaker 1: are we doing shoutouts until there's a certain date that
Speaker 1: we said last week. I think that the cut off
Speaker 1: was what whoever bought it until last week? It was
Speaker 1: like today this Friday. So yeah, these are the people
Speaker 1: who didn't miss out because they're fucking fun. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: have a couple more hours to do it. I think
Speaker 1: it's like I think we staid like eleven fifty nine
Speaker 1: pm tonight on day of release night. You want to
Speaker 1: order our bookts you go to Sorry about Last Night
Speaker 1: Comedy dot com slash book and uh there's links to
Speaker 1: order it. And then once you're done doing that, if
Speaker 1: you want us to shout out your name on the podcast,
Speaker 1: fill out the form on our website under the same
Speaker 1: U R L. Sounds more difficult than it is. It's
Speaker 1: really lazy, I promise. So thank you so much to
Speaker 1: the following people, Justine Allison, Isabelle Wilson, Summers Brass Sick. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's how you say it, Ashley Cash, Ruby and Garcia
Speaker 1: Paulina Signs, Jasmine Boyd, Aaron Tappan, Sarah Haver, Carly Warrender,
Speaker 1: Kayla Altman, Brianna James, Kayla Marler, Alexis coz Art, Angelina Pinya,
Speaker 1: Margot Carpenter, Beatrice Reader, Holly Lafono, Julia Hansen, Sierra Herring,
Speaker 1: Ali Gallinger, Laura Spratt, Timothy Drew, Karen Ramirez, Nancy Jaminez,
Speaker 1: Christy McFarlane, Hailey Caradona, Jackie Sanchez, Casey Hathaway, Shannon Healy,
Speaker 1: Melanie Hittinger Yo, what's up North, Lindsay Miller, Natalie san Fretello,
Speaker 1: that wasn't so bad, Casey Claren Beck, Amanda Easton, Michelle
Speaker 1: Bossi and Oh here we go, and Anselmo Hermo Ceo,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Katie Williams, Stacy Ruas, Kyle Eckart, Diana Hernandez,
Speaker 1: Amy Kern, Rachel McSorley, Zoe Gill, Angel Galaghos, Lindsay Grizzard, Book,
Speaker 1: will Brook Wilson, Oh God, I know how every elementary
Speaker 1: school feature feels Olga nicole Le Nicole a Yeva, we
Speaker 1: practice that one? We did? I practice it? And Amma
Speaker 1: Hoyle Yes. And then also thank you to number one
Speaker 1: one of my best friends in the entire world, Manny Bozos.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Samantha Lonzac, Cat Nearing Garden, Hannah Herbert, Sorry,
Speaker 1: I'm also sick, Mary West, Lee Hastings, Michelle Di Durko,
Speaker 1: Rebecca Casavant, Kaylee Indeck, Madeleine Arius, Megan Kelly, uh not,
Speaker 1: probably not that one, but Andrea Goodwin, Amanda Aldus, Jessica Stevens,
Speaker 1: Lindsay Smith, Molly Coffee. Oh that's a cool name on
Speaker 1: Molly Coffee, fuck you, Dana Bizone, Brick Ritter, Darby Fallon,
Speaker 1: Katie Cokuca, Christina Massik, Mary Catherine Bradley, Brianna Middleman, Natalia Vasquez,
Speaker 1: Diana Now, Jackie Pace, Cara Bridges, Alex Italiano. I mean
Speaker 1: that sounds like a character you made up. I Sally
Speaker 1: fuck are you, Erica Sharpe, Diana Scheller, Brittany ness ladek
Speaker 1: Annie Sullivan, Hakim, Henry, Chris Walden, Alexandra Porto, Leanne Janssen,
Speaker 1: Simon d We get it. Well then yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: know if you did that purpose or not. But Emily Todd,
Speaker 1: Katie Scott, Alison Zuck, Rachel Testmer, Christina Cooney, Megan Mitchell,
Speaker 1: Nicole trou For, Alex Volsanski, Elaine Saint Germain, Alessandra Fairlessandra
Speaker 1: Anna catch Him, Jenny Pettit, Amanda Walla, Meghan Daniel, David Berry,
Speaker 1: Vanessa Navarro, Rodrigues. We thank you, thank you so much,
Speaker 1: and that's not all the shout outs, and well, I
Speaker 1: want to think of a way to make this like
Speaker 1: a little game. Well, like so I was like, well,
Speaker 1: it's fun for the people who bought it, So I mean,
Speaker 1: just buy a book and then maybe you'll have more
Speaker 1: funduring that segment. I don't know why to tell you.
Speaker 1: It's very anno. You make a good point like this
Speaker 1: isn't fun for me, Well do better, like during award ceremonies,
Speaker 1: like they're never going to call my name yet because
Speaker 1: you suck. You suck at whatever we're getting awarding and
Speaker 1: you need to get better and we're publicly shaming you
Speaker 1: to light a fire under your two I already have
Speaker 1: I don't know sister named Jubilee. Oh she was great.
Speaker 1: Her name was Jubilee. Because people kids have been through
Speaker 1: a way more than any of these people was complain about.
Speaker 1: I love them. Yeah no, there was no one like
Speaker 1: that was like ripe or anything. But yeah no, but
Speaker 1: like basically they were you know, not that I know. Well,
Speaker 1: could they tell you about the kids? So I probably
Speaker 1: would know unless they didn't know, and then you know.
Speaker 1: But anyway, the point is, uh No, people liked me
Speaker 1: in the Big Brothers Big Sisters program because I kept
Speaker 1: it real. I want to be with Ms Karan because
Speaker 1: she tells it like it is no. I mean they're
Speaker 1: sassy to you. That's good kids. That's why I love kids,
Speaker 1: because they're looking honest. Jubilee was awesome. I really liked her.
Speaker 1: Just a great name. I don't want to name a
Speaker 1: kid that well as your conne kid gonna be Puerto
Speaker 1: Rican otherwise they I don't think they can pull it off. Oh.
Speaker 1: I mean I I somehow pulled off k R y
Speaker 1: s T y at A. If I'm at a June
Speaker 1: name Jubilee, I would be like, that's a minty to
Speaker 1: gotta spell it j J And then it's fine. Oh god, wow,
Speaker 1: getting all kinds of ideas. I love Jubilee. I hope
Speaker 1: she's not pregnant. Okay, moving on, um let's see what
Speaker 1: were you talking about today? So I know sometimes we
Speaker 1: get these emails and are sorry about last night in
Speaker 1: box and it's definitely like people trying to trick us
Speaker 1: into talking about what they want to promote for free
Speaker 1: on the podcast, and in this case it worked. Um
Speaker 1: So I am dB, which for those of you you
Speaker 1: don't know, it's the internet movie databout Basis where you
Speaker 1: you know, you're watching a move and you're like, who
Speaker 1: is that? Gal? I remember lighting design gal and then
Speaker 1: you look it up and you're like, oh, that's that's
Speaker 1: that actor. Um So, they just started doing a new
Speaker 1: F rating uh to highlight films that are directed by women,
Speaker 1: written by women, and or past the best del test meet,
Speaker 1: which means they feature conversation between women that isn't about men.
Speaker 1: Um So, I just wanted to discuss thoughts on this
Speaker 1: because I think people are always so excited, like, look
Speaker 1: what we're doing, this is we're helping you. We put
Speaker 1: an f to everything so that you don't have to
Speaker 1: be subjected. Good because I wasn't sure what you're movies
Speaker 1: that are directed by a man, because I know that
Speaker 1: might hurt you, and I won't know that you're not guys. Sorry,
Speaker 1: I have a degree in directing. If you don't watch
Speaker 1: movies directed by men, you're gonna see two movies and
Speaker 1: they both are gonna be a little bit. That're gonna
Speaker 1: watch the Virgin Suicides. Think like this rotation of five
Speaker 1: movies is great. Um Well, at first, upon reading that
Speaker 1: article after you highlights, I wasn't sure what your opinion
Speaker 1: of it was, and I keep it a little condescending.
Speaker 1: I always keep it secrets so you don't know. I know,
Speaker 1: I mean nine times at it's and I'm gonna hate it.
Speaker 1: But yeah, but uh, it is a little condescending. It
Speaker 1: does also speak though, too, because remember and we made
Speaker 1: them pink Oh no, they didn't, right, they didn't make
Speaker 1: them ds. They just started sending them in pink envil.
Speaker 1: If you're a woman, they send you pink on tampon.
Speaker 1: This one's emotional. You might start bleeding herring it. You
Speaker 1: can't handle anything, I will say. I talked about this
Speaker 1: on the intro to one of the podcasts right after
Speaker 1: I saw Mad Max, because I was one of the
Speaker 1: reasons why I was so blown away. First of all,
Speaker 1: I don't I have like some disorder in which after
Speaker 1: I see a movie in the movie theater, I'm still
Speaker 1: in the world of that movie for at least a
Speaker 1: couple more hours. Yeah, but that's why I went to
Speaker 1: a strip club after I saw spring Breakers, because I
Speaker 1: was like, I can't, I can't. And then I saw
Speaker 1: a logan and there was this I was we were
Speaker 1: walking home from the theater and there was this belligerently
Speaker 1: drunk guy like knocking over signs, and I was like, Stephen,
Speaker 1: you go inside. I'm gonna follow him and I and
Speaker 1: Steven was like, what the funk No, And I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: then you're coming with me because I want to make
Speaker 1: sure that he hasn't hurt anybody. I just felt like
Speaker 1: you felt like you were an X Men. Yeah kind
Speaker 1: of Um. But after I saw Mad Max, one of
Speaker 1: the things that blew me away was with Charlie's with Furiosa.
Speaker 1: Charlie there on character she was a badass, fucking bitch.
Speaker 1: She didn't give a shit about banging Tom Hardy, no
Speaker 1: matter how good he fucking looked good. God, he looked good. Uh.
Speaker 1: And she that wasn't even part of the conversation, wasn't
Speaker 1: even part of her dialogue, It wasn't even a little
Speaker 1: bit of part of the plot. And me, me being
Speaker 1: so like amazed by that made me realize how little
Speaker 1: women are featured in film, uh or television where the
Speaker 1: plot doesn't involve like yeah, but I want to die,
Speaker 1: Like if he doesn't like me, I'll die. And this
Speaker 1: just so fucking annoying to see. So I guess if
Speaker 1: you're like, you know what, I'm in the mood to
Speaker 1: see a movie that doesn't involve women only wanting to
Speaker 1: talk about men. Yeah, I would. I probably looked that up. Honestly.
Speaker 1: I liked the part about the best shell test just
Speaker 1: because I think that's interesting and I think not a
Speaker 1: lot of people are even aware what it is, because
Speaker 1: you really only hear like little feminists, you know, like
Speaker 1: little feminists, little like you know, little your little feminist
Speaker 1: is what I call feminists. I hate annoying fem you know,
Speaker 1: the little twerps. Yeah, twerp. You only hears people mentioning that.
Speaker 1: But I think it's very I think it's very important
Speaker 1: because uh and I know, like when we're writing. But
Speaker 1: like my mom pointed it out. She didn't call it
Speaker 1: the fucking best tell best del test because she's not
Speaker 1: an asshole. But she was just like I would always
Speaker 1: watch Sex in the City and she'd be like, yeah,
Speaker 1: but don't don't you think the problem with this show
Speaker 1: is like all the all every episode is just them
Speaker 1: like winding over men, like even though they're like super
Speaker 1: successful and they live in New York and they have
Speaker 1: these great apartments. And I was like, you know what
Speaker 1: valid points. I fin you could still enjoy this show,
Speaker 1: but I think it's important to know that and to
Speaker 1: recognize it because I didn't recognize it until I look
Speaker 1: back at it and go, wait a second. Yeah, Miranda
Speaker 1: was a lawyer and she didn't talk about that like
Speaker 1: once and everyone was a fucking mess. I was like,
Speaker 1: do you get it together? And it's just then we
Speaker 1: become accustomed to like, well, women are masses. That's fine, right,
Speaker 1: and like that's okay, that's the Norman. That's almost something
Speaker 1: to strive for, like, oh, I'm striving to like I
Speaker 1: want to start my day with ax an X and
Speaker 1: a rose. Yeah start. Oh well, I mean when you
Speaker 1: when you get that good money, you got start to
Speaker 1: saying like that, I don't do something like your money.
Speaker 1: It is interesting, but you know, it's also fun and
Speaker 1: fun to have IMD basically like, oh, let's send it
Speaker 1: to the Guys podcast. They're gonna love it. Yeah, l ls.
Speaker 1: But also to like if you look statifically, just because
Speaker 1: I've been researching because remember we wrote that book. Um,
Speaker 1: one of the things I was researching was, you know,
Speaker 1: like with the financial gap and stuff, and statistically women
Speaker 1: don't invest their money as much as men do, and
Speaker 1: that's what we don't know. Yeah, We're like, yeah, but
Speaker 1: if fucking if honestly and I know this sounds try,
Speaker 1: but I think if women had more important jobs in
Speaker 1: film and television and their plot wasn't involved around the
Speaker 1: approval of a dude, it would be I don't know,
Speaker 1: you just what what is possible and what is not possible?
Speaker 1: Out of a woman, it kind of shapes at and yeah, pop,
Speaker 1: I mean a lot of like, especially for like kids
Speaker 1: like Goss. I'm sure a lot of like what I
Speaker 1: thought my life was going to be like was dictated
Speaker 1: by the movies I watched. So I'm very confused because
Speaker 1: I thought I was gonna be happy and when's that coming?
Speaker 1: And when? When I first got my last my last
Speaker 1: ever day job was in an accounting department at this
Speaker 1: company called we Work shout out um. But there it
Speaker 1: was mostly women and they were all accountant and they
Speaker 1: were fucking number crunching. Oh my god, they were so smart.
Speaker 1: They were just so I mean, I'm not math is
Speaker 1: not I got an ap math and still and I
Speaker 1: got right out of it. Math. You're not an account
Speaker 1: that you're like something well, they work into they work
Speaker 1: in the financial section of that company whatever whatever is budget.
Speaker 1: I don't I don't even know the fucking words, right,
Speaker 1: and I just shredded the paper. But I caught myself thinking, like, God,
Speaker 1: that's it's mostly women and they're all really smart. Why
Speaker 1: am I shocked by that? That's weird. I'm gonna it's
Speaker 1: sad to be shocked by that. Well, our lawyer's office
Speaker 1: has almost all like the lawyers that work there are
Speaker 1: him in yeah, and like they are also women who
Speaker 1: looks like supermodels. But I mean it is Beverly Hills. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, and I know even you and I walked
Speaker 1: in like we were kind of surprised, but you shouldn't.
Speaker 1: You shouldn't be surprised. And you want to live in
Speaker 1: a world where you're not surprised or scared when you
Speaker 1: walk into a place that you know if the job
Speaker 1: is not gonna get done right, you know, you want
Speaker 1: to go on that plane with a female female pilot
Speaker 1: and go, fuck, yeah, bit we're gonna get there on
Speaker 1: time and looking great. Ye maybe early in fact, um anyways,
Speaker 1: to check that out. And then also while we're in
Speaker 1: like non super personal stuff, I watched an interesting film
Speaker 1: last night on Netflix called Accidental Courtesy. Accidental Courtesy. It's
Speaker 1: about it's about race. It's about this musician African American
Speaker 1: musician named Darryl Davis, and basically he spent his life
Speaker 1: uh seeking out and befriending members of the k k
Speaker 1: K to change their opinions. Is this a documentary? Yeah? Sorry,
Speaker 1: sorry I missed that part because I was waiting to
Speaker 1: tell if you were going to say it was fiction
Speaker 1: or not. No, No, it's a documentary. It's it's fabulous.
Speaker 1: Uh And obviously it's about race, and I'm just recommending
Speaker 1: it because it goes into a lot of things that
Speaker 1: we talked about on this podcast, uh, like methods for
Speaker 1: uh creating the change that you want to see in
Speaker 1: the world and being effective. Yeah, and it's a it's
Speaker 1: a it's all about communication. Basically the movie is when
Speaker 1: you when you think about it, it boils down to
Speaker 1: communication and how he was willing to sit down and
Speaker 1: like it takes a lot of work to number of
Speaker 1: find these people have the courage to go and talk
Speaker 1: to someone who like has spoken openly about like wanting
Speaker 1: you not to exist. And I also it explains some differences.
Speaker 1: I think people are confused about the actual motives of
Speaker 1: the k k K. It's just like, oh, they're just
Speaker 1: they want all black people to die. They all want
Speaker 1: all Jews to die. That's not actually true when you
Speaker 1: say stuff like that. That's really, um, more of a
Speaker 1: Nazi culture. Whereas, yes, Nazis exists and they do want
Speaker 1: you to die, so don't ever be confused about that.
Speaker 1: But the KKK is more like they want separation, which
Speaker 1: some black people also some some members of Black Lives Matter,
Speaker 1: which they do interview some young members and some older
Speaker 1: members of Black Lives Matter. And I just think it's
Speaker 1: really interesting to see kind of these conversations and they
Speaker 1: don't all go well uh, and it's very interesting and
Speaker 1: I think you can apply kind of the skills that
Speaker 1: Darryl Davis uses, uh when talking to if you're a liberal,
Speaker 1: when talking to your conservative friends, and if you are
Speaker 1: a feminist talking to someone who's a misogynist, Like I
Speaker 1: really think, um, there's a lot of good and you
Speaker 1: might not agree with his tactics, and you might, you know,
Speaker 1: still be like the A lot of the people who
Speaker 1: work for Black Lives Matter, we're not into it because
Speaker 1: they're like, yeah, because it's like, why is with my
Speaker 1: job to educate all these And I see that a
Speaker 1: lot on Facebook that people feel frustrated but I like, job,
Speaker 1: it's not your job you want. We appreciate it. And
Speaker 1: I think he's putting in a lot of work of
Speaker 1: having these conversations, uh, and they're like, well, you know,
Speaker 1: all these years, you only got like, you know, twenty
Speaker 1: six or whatever people to resign from the k K.
Speaker 1: That's great, but that's one guy's work, and that's amazing.
Speaker 1: And I just think it's like it's a really like
Speaker 1: intimate way of creating change. And not that there's anything
Speaker 1: with marches and stuff, but they're marches are very vague
Speaker 1: and they come off as like kind of like it's
Speaker 1: like we all get out in March and really really excited,
Speaker 1: but like what he does like just seems like it
Speaker 1: takes a lot more work to get in your car
Speaker 1: and meeting people one by one than just to get,
Speaker 1: you know, put on some sweatshirt march and then go there.
Speaker 1: He's humanizing himself exactly somebody who doesn't see him as
Speaker 1: a human, and it's like that's that's like like why
Speaker 1: it's such a powerful thing to look somebody in the
Speaker 1: eyes who you have an opposing opinion with and really
Speaker 1: connect with them and realize that you both are both
Speaker 1: neither people are monsters, and there is a way to
Speaker 1: talk to each other, and disagreeing is fine, But to
Speaker 1: make people understand where you're coming from, I think it's
Speaker 1: so important. The one problem is though that I'm sure
Speaker 1: he's run into in this documentary excited to watch it.
Speaker 1: It's probably people don't want to change their minds. They're
Speaker 1: they're happy being fucking stubborn for sure. And I mean, like,
Speaker 1: you know, obviously people aren't all you know, it's like
Speaker 1: they're all like you know, joining the end of uh
Speaker 1: and what you know, Like yeah, like I can't even
Speaker 1: think or talk. Um, they're not all doing that, but
Speaker 1: like you know, they're definitely hanging up their hoods. And
Speaker 1: that's and that's a start. And I think what I
Speaker 1: learned at the end of it, and I was thinking,
Speaker 1: and I understand. I understood the anger from the Black
Speaker 1: Lives Matter people. Uh, I totally got it, because like,
Speaker 1: why you're sitting down with these assholes? I get it.
Speaker 1: I get that anger too. There was also a huge
Speaker 1: age gap between a lot of those people. But the
Speaker 1: thing that everyone had in common, whether they be members
Speaker 1: of the KKK, whether they beat Darryl Davis, or whether
Speaker 1: they be the Black Lives Matter folks. They all had
Speaker 1: a need to be heard and a need to feel important.
Speaker 1: And I think that's something that we see reinforced time
Speaker 1: and time again, and like a lot of conversations that
Speaker 1: we have, like most people just want to be heard
Speaker 1: and want to feel important, and a lot of these
Speaker 1: people in the KKK, like it's hard to imagine feeling
Speaker 1: like scared as just like a guy, but there is
Speaker 1: this weird fear that a lot of white dudes feel
Speaker 1: like like like my culture and quote is being like
Speaker 1: overtaken or washed away by black people. I don't agree
Speaker 1: with that, but that's just what they're they're feeling is
Speaker 1: and not a lot of people would even take the
Speaker 1: time to hear somebody say that, right, And I think
Speaker 1: that's and I think that's really interesting. And you know,
Speaker 1: Gardy mus look smart and a lot of other people
Speaker 1: on both sides look dumb. So it's just interesting. And
Speaker 1: it's also a kind of a lesson in educating yourself
Speaker 1: and not just going and shouting in people's face about
Speaker 1: something like really knowing the facts, because I mean, I
Speaker 1: had no idea the difference between like a neo Nazi
Speaker 1: and a member of the KKK. I didn't know that
Speaker 1: that separation between like wanting people to die and just
Speaker 1: wanting to separate, Like those are two very different concepts. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and it's weird because even if you are like, if
Speaker 1: you believe, if you have what you think is strong
Speaker 1: morals and stuff, when people email us, uh disagree with
Speaker 1: something we said on the podcast or criticizing us, their
Speaker 1: tone is whether or not I I listen to them
Speaker 1: if they if they come at me with their the
Speaker 1: mail us and they're like, I can't fucking believe you
Speaker 1: guys believe, and I'm like, I'm not. I don't even
Speaker 1: want to listen to what you have to say. If
Speaker 1: someone emails us, and it happens all the time that
Speaker 1: it's like, hey, you guys mentioned this and I just
Speaker 1: wanted to give you another perspective on it. And here
Speaker 1: it's like, there we go, let's talk like people. Because
Speaker 1: even though the ball up the second you gave me
Speaker 1: an attitude like that, Yeah, he's like why, He's like,
Speaker 1: everyone's like, why are you like driving to these people's
Speaker 1: houses And he was like, well, because I via Facebook
Speaker 1: isn't going to work like people. These people are just
Speaker 1: little team kittie cats in person as you might have imagined.
Speaker 1: And then on the last note, um, you know I
Speaker 1: didn't read. I read somewhere a while ago that masturbation
Speaker 1: helps alleviate headaches, and I get a lot of headaches.
Speaker 1: So like my finger has become like Florence Nightingale, Like
Speaker 1: basically it's just working all overtime. Thing is Jesus, And
Speaker 1: I was. I was so proud of myself because I
Speaker 1: was able to have an orgasm this past week by
Speaker 1: merely imagining that I was having sex with Marilyn Hants.
Speaker 1: And wait, you were figuring yourself too, though, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: but yeah, no, yeah, I wasn't just it wasn't just
Speaker 1: a morsel. No no, no, no, no, no no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'm not. I don't. I don't even believe that really happens.
Speaker 1: I mean some people claim it does, right, I don't
Speaker 1: really believe it. And now it's just like, you know what,
Speaker 1: this is the benefit of growing up in a boring
Speaker 1: town of New Jersey. You have a great imagination. Yeah,
Speaker 1: imagination is an underrated thing, and it's the key to
Speaker 1: happy life. Yeah. I don't think I've ever because I
Speaker 1: don't think i've ever had been able to like just
Speaker 1: imagine having sex with someone ever actually had sex but
Speaker 1: oh no, oh my god all the time. Oh I
Speaker 1: don't or someone I don't know in real life. Right,
Speaker 1: I've never met Marilyn Manson. I think that's my point. Celebrity. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I've never done that. I've I've I've definitely imagined fucking
Speaker 1: like God, I want to Bruce Willis since I was
Speaker 1: a kid. Is weird. This is weird thing, Bruce Willis.
Speaker 1: I see that even still Yeah, older he gets, the
Speaker 1: more I want to suck him. He's still looking good.
Speaker 1: So good. Yeah, shiny ass head, Bruce, get over here, baby.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I'm just not into that name because that's
Speaker 1: my old boss's name. Um. Alright, guys, So there's more
Speaker 1: things that we gotta do, and I gotta really look
Speaker 1: at this because I think there's an ad that I
Speaker 1: have to read at a certain point, which I should
Speaker 1: have had this open. Okay, no on two more ats
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Speaker 1: that's so funny. We're talking about underwear because I went
Speaker 1: to leave to come to your apartment, and uh, I
Speaker 1: didn't have any because there's all dirty, real busy. I
Speaker 1: gotta send my launderway, but sending underwear way freaks me out.
Speaker 1: And then I'm just where what do you think people
Speaker 1: are doing? And it jizzing in it? Maybe sniffing it?
Speaker 1: Oh my god? See this is what who cares? If
Speaker 1: they sniffed it. They're gonna sniff it, They're gonna they're
Speaker 1: gonna get what they need. Then they're gonna wash it
Speaker 1: for you. It's very true. I don't care. People can
Speaker 1: sniff their my underwear all they want. Yeah, just wash
Speaker 1: it after. That's all I got. Society makes me such
Speaker 1: a scare bitch. Okay uh And also I'm currently wearing
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Speaker 1: Drive somewhere or get driven, don't drive. The subject line
Speaker 1: of this email is am I crazier. It's my birth
Speaker 1: control making me crazy. It's in all caps. Hey, ladies,
Speaker 1: I love your podcast and I've been listening for about
Speaker 1: six months. My friends and I are obsessed. You guys
Speaker 1: rock now. I know Christina used to have problems with
Speaker 1: her birth control, making her quote crazy, but I don't
Speaker 1: think she ever talked about what she means by crazy girl.
Speaker 1: I'm twenty two years old and I've just been I've
Speaker 1: just recently started taking birth control again, and I think
Speaker 1: I might it might be making me go crazy. Just
Speaker 1: since I have been taking it, I have been very
Speaker 1: paranoid thinking the guy I've been seeing slush date has
Speaker 1: been hanging out with his X, not interested in me anymore,
Speaker 1: or only using me for sex, all thoughts I've been
Speaker 1: having for absolutely no reason. He has not changed his
Speaker 1: behavior in any way. I don't know where these thoughts
Speaker 1: are coming from. We have been seeing each other for
Speaker 1: a little over a month. He's met my family and
Speaker 1: I've met his. We both have met each other's friends
Speaker 1: and are constantly texting hanging out. So I don't know
Speaker 1: why I would start randomly thinking these things. The only
Speaker 1: explanation I could think of is that I am crazy,
Speaker 1: or that the birth control is just making me crazy.
Speaker 1: I know you guys aren't doctors l O L, but
Speaker 1: I've figured maybe we are certainly not my friend, I
Speaker 1: figured maybe you could shed some light. I don't even
Speaker 1: know if it would be possible for the birth control
Speaker 1: to be making me like this was Christine's problem similar
Speaker 1: Thank you, love you guys, blah blah blah. Oh girl,
Speaker 1: I guess I never told this story in the podcast.
Speaker 1: I don't know. She'd only been list same for six months.
Speaker 1: But did you were Simon? Uh yeah, the bartender. Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: he doesn't want to do the podcast, so that's guy.
Speaker 1: I won't say his last time. I one of my
Speaker 1: peak in sanity moments when birth control was I went
Speaker 1: on a day with Simon and we went to like
Speaker 1: a bowling alley or something, and I had I had
Speaker 1: just gone on the pill again because I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm sucking people not get pregnantive. And I had a
Speaker 1: couple of drinks, but that's that never makes me go nuts.
Speaker 1: Like I drink frequently, but not you know, in heavy
Speaker 1: amounts so that I don't go crazy from that. And
Speaker 1: I remember, oh god, I was going like a little
Speaker 1: crazy that day and I felt it, but I was
Speaker 1: just like yelling at people. But I had nothing to
Speaker 1: do with my period because I get PMS pretty bad.
Speaker 1: It was not even near that time. And then, for
Speaker 1: whatever reason, Simon's friend met up with us at the
Speaker 1: bowling alley and I got mad that he wasn't paying
Speaker 1: attention to me, and I was like, why do you
Speaker 1: You don't even want me here? You and I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't do that. I don't do that and uh.
Speaker 1: And then I yelled at Simon in the bowling alley
Speaker 1: and I started scream crying and I just left because
Speaker 1: he was like, uh, I'm like, well, you know, even
Speaker 1: get to say anything. And I left. And then on
Speaker 1: the way home I texted him. I said, I hope
Speaker 1: when you go to get into cab on the way
Speaker 1: home you get hit by a truck and you die.
Speaker 1: And I went. I came home and threw my phone
Speaker 1: against the wall. I and I that's not something. This
Speaker 1: is the birth control. Yes, it was for no, and
Speaker 1: this is this is why. This is why it made
Speaker 1: me even more crazy because I was like, it can't
Speaker 1: be the birth control. Do what? He missed him? What?
Speaker 1: Because it wasn't near my period. It wasn't a time
Speaker 1: when ioul get p MS, because I do get PMS.
Speaker 1: I don't go that fucking crazy when I get it. Though,
Speaker 1: there was no reason for me to be upset with him.
Speaker 1: He truly did nothing. I've been with men who were
Speaker 1: wonderful gentleman, I've been with me with pieces of ship.
Speaker 1: I can recognize he did not do anything wrong. And
Speaker 1: I remember, um, my room roommate woke up because I
Speaker 1: threw my phone against her bedroom wall and she was like,
Speaker 1: are you okay? And I just started freaking the funk out, saying,
Speaker 1: I hope Simon dies. I went insane. I was going insane,
Speaker 1: and uh I hadn't been drugged. I had there's I
Speaker 1: went through every option and it makes you feel even
Speaker 1: crazier because you're like, how can a pill make me
Speaker 1: do this? And you just doubt, you doubt if it's
Speaker 1: making you crazy and it's a drug. Yeah, after you
Speaker 1: were on a drug, but just not like right. But
Speaker 1: when I got it prescribed and I told my g
Speaker 1: I N like, oh, you know, I went on this
Speaker 1: a long time ago and it made me a little nuts.
Speaker 1: And this was back in high school and the g
Speaker 1: y N gave me that look that a dog maybe
Speaker 1: you know when a dog told you you said that
Speaker 1: you said this on a podcast. Yeah, so I was like, okay,
Speaker 1: well maybe, uh, they've made innovations. No, they didn't. And
Speaker 1: then when I went off and went off of it,
Speaker 1: and I went in the bar next where he worked,
Speaker 1: and I like came in with like the next day
Speaker 1: and I was like, I'm sorry. I said I wanted
Speaker 1: you to die, and he was like, it's okay, but
Speaker 1: are you okay? I thought he would have liked that,
Speaker 1: and then you walked in and then he hid under
Speaker 1: the bar. He should have, but he didn't. He's Irish,
Speaker 1: he's strong. Um. But yeah, I and I've had many
Speaker 1: moments after that when I went on it again and
Speaker 1: the only and then I've talked to my mom and
Speaker 1: she went psychonic on it. And it literally feels like
Speaker 1: you're going into psychosis. It's horrifying. You feel trapped in
Speaker 1: your own body. It sucks, And that sounds like something
Speaker 1: I would absolutely have done a birth control So why
Speaker 1: did you go back on it? Because Stephen was super
Speaker 1: paranoid about pregnancy and uh, and we still use condoms,
Speaker 1: but I would have been debating going back onto this
Speaker 1: new kind that I heard about low low estern ff e.
Speaker 1: And that didn't make me go nuts, but it killed
Speaker 1: my sex druck. And I was like, well, I'm not
Speaker 1: fucking anyway, what the fuck? But I do I do
Speaker 1: a bit now about birth control. I do this bit
Speaker 1: about I go in the honest like anybody else's psychochon
Speaker 1: on birth control now. And at first no one says anything,
Speaker 1: and then like way to beat, and all these women
Speaker 1: are like yeah, me and more people get like this
Speaker 1: than I thought. Well, yeah, I mean it's something I've
Speaker 1: heard before for sure, so that it seems like that's
Speaker 1: a birth control girl. M well, I mean yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean but then my acupuncture is also told me like,
Speaker 1: if you go off birth control, there's a chance that
Speaker 1: you could be attracted to a completely different type of
Speaker 1: person because it can it kind of controls like whatever
Speaker 1: that is in you that attracts you to other people. Uh.
Speaker 1: And I thought that was interesting and spooky, very spooky.
Speaker 1: Um all right to this next email is called but
Speaker 1: I want to fuck musicians, And with the amount of
Speaker 1: sas you put on that, I say, go for it. Um.
Speaker 1: High Current and Christina absolutely love you ladies and look
Speaker 1: forward to every Friday, so I can hear you too
Speaker 1: quick question. I'm a female musician with a full band.
Speaker 1: I love music and incidentally musicians. I am attracted to
Speaker 1: males and females. I've heard y'all say never date musicians
Speaker 1: many times on the show, but I haven't heard any
Speaker 1: reasons why. We didn't know yet to give any Maybe
Speaker 1: I missed it, But could you elaborate for me? What's
Speaker 1: wrong with musicians? Do you feel this way about female
Speaker 1: and male musicians or just males? If so, why how
Speaker 1: are comedians actors different from musicians? They're not don't date
Speaker 1: them either. I've only dated one musician and the experience
Speaker 1: was fine. No different from the non musician people i've dated, thoughts, Well,
Speaker 1: obviously this is our personal experience, so we're only go
Speaker 1: I have never It's never gone well. When I've dated musician,
Speaker 1: mostly they're either they're like two kinds of musicians. The
Speaker 1: one that will like sit in the high school cafeteria
Speaker 1: with his acoustic guitar and Edwin McCain song and then
Speaker 1: everyone like that's like my favorite song, and he's like,
Speaker 1: oh really, I didn't know that, but he fucking dig
Speaker 1: because he fucking s talked to h on on Facebook and
Speaker 1: he's trying to manipulate you to get your pants sure,
Speaker 1: or the guy that are just uh DESI on girls
Speaker 1: like a little lighter than that. But it's like one
Speaker 1: of two very emotions. A lot of musicians a lot
Speaker 1: um So I mean basically this is different because you,
Speaker 1: the person writing us, is a musician. Now you get it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So most people who listen to this podcasts, we are
Speaker 1: assuming are not comedians or musicians or actors. Actors are
Speaker 1: kind of like their own thing, their intends to. I
Speaker 1: know that actors all those people should date each other,
Speaker 1: is our point, because we're talking about like regular regular
Speaker 1: folks don't date a musician because why musicians and comedians
Speaker 1: are very similar. You are right, both intolerable, narcissistic, have
Speaker 1: a lifestyle where they're on a road, the road a lot.
Speaker 1: So it's just like people are fawning it over all
Speaker 1: over you. There's temptation after temptation. Uh, it's stressful. They're
Speaker 1: gonna be up late. They're definitely gonna have some kind
Speaker 1: of substance abuse problem. And if they're not, they're probably
Speaker 1: a shitty born musician or a comedian like just the
Speaker 1: songs are all about a happy things. You want to
Speaker 1: hear that ship, you know, Yeah, like who's sucking the
Speaker 1: guy who don't worry to be happy? We don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know if he's even here anymore. He's probably dead. Um,
Speaker 1: but yeah, so that's what we're talking about. You are
Speaker 1: a musicians, so sure you can date muse other musicians.
Speaker 1: Uh and not. I would please don't don't date people
Speaker 1: in your band like that that happened, Well, it's gonna happen.
Speaker 1: But like I'm just saying, like we gonna end well
Speaker 1: and you know this, and I don't have to tell you.
Speaker 1: Uh and uh. We're mostly talking about male and musicians,
Speaker 1: so I don't really know what female musician is like
Speaker 1: to date. Yeah, I know female musicians, but I don't
Speaker 1: know what they are in the context of I want
Speaker 1: to sleep with you or date you, So I I
Speaker 1: can't speak to that at all. I can only speak
Speaker 1: to the tens and tens and tens and twenties of
Speaker 1: musicians that I have been swooned by. It's a very
Speaker 1: logical thought process, though, So if you're if you're a
Speaker 1: person who is not in the business, and your choice
Speaker 1: is to date someone who is in the entertainment business,
Speaker 1: especially one of those specific, uh parts of it. Those
Speaker 1: people said, I'm so great that my career is gonna
Speaker 1: be me on stage performing and people are gonna pay money.
Speaker 1: Hell yeah, that's not going to be a good fifty
Speaker 1: fifty relationship partner. Logic, guys, logic, it's not gonna be
Speaker 1: a lot of equality and conversation. You have said, that
Speaker 1: says ate someone who also loves themselves as much as
Speaker 1: you love yourself, And I think I think it'll be
Speaker 1: good to go. All right, guys, Well, finally we've gotten
Speaker 1: here to the introduction of our big guest for today's show.
Speaker 1: You might have seen her as the character Tiffany on
Speaker 1: HBOS Insecure. She's host on True TV. She's a comedian, writer, producer.
Speaker 1: Please welcome the very lovely and wonderful man. Let's see us.
Speaker 1: Love is patient's general, it's kind. It smiles as you.
Speaker 1: You've been on my mind to see my phone just die.
Speaker 1: I hit the pay phone just so I can talk
Speaker 1: to you. It's just laundry money. I'll spend it all
Speaker 1: when I think about you. That happens when I think
Speaker 1: about you. That happens often. I feel like falling. But
Speaker 1: now I'm all in. We part in all this. I
Speaker 1: think you're gorgeous. I mean, regardless, I'm kind of stall
Speaker 1: it now. I hope you remember all those things when
Speaker 1: you can talk about I said, we're talking out. I
Speaker 1: know you're trying to find your own and I ain't
Speaker 1: trying to die alone. I know you're finbably busy, but
Speaker 1: just miss me with that doubt tone. Hello, we're here
Speaker 1: with Amanda's just talking about how great and it's being
Speaker 1: lady and entertainment. It's just a wonderful, wonderful morning here
Speaker 1: in study. It's just great. I feel like it's still
Speaker 1: morning because I lost an hour, but I forgot. Yes,
Speaker 1: I really was not prepared for that hour. Lot me neither.
Speaker 1: And uh. I was in Connecticut doing stand up with
Speaker 1: Roywood Jr. Emma Eagan's son, and it was a blast
Speaker 1: and then we were like we're out. Yeah, I was
Speaker 1: second it off stage. Yeah, And I fell asleep and
Speaker 1: woke up and it was three am, and I was like,
Speaker 1: what happened? All that happened? Yeah? It was still one.
Speaker 1: So you're we are? How you doing good sex stuff?
Speaker 1: I mean, there's I was just telling my home girl.
Speaker 1: I was like, I don't even I don't even foresee
Speaker 1: any sex stuff happening on the horizon. Well, how long
Speaker 1: has it been since the last sex stuff? This is
Speaker 1: gonna be our greatest interview. It's gonna be our most
Speaker 1: mature questions ever October October and before that April, I
Speaker 1: thought you were gonna give us an a specific day
Speaker 1: in October and haunting three pm. Yeah, it's actually it
Speaker 1: might be that specific. Now is this your choice or
Speaker 1: is this just the universe's choice or a little bit
Speaker 1: of both. It's the I mean, I guess it's a
Speaker 1: little bit of both in that like I just can't. Like,
Speaker 1: at one point in time, you know, it's like if
Speaker 1: you knew the names of all the Cosby kids, you
Speaker 1: had a shot, Like it was that basic, you know,
Speaker 1: But now it's like, I just if you say, if
Speaker 1: you say some dumb sh it like I no, no, Intelerance,
Speaker 1: I can't because then I feel I feel like your
Speaker 1: dick is coated with the dumb ship and it's almost
Speaker 1: like when it inserts into me, you have injected me
Speaker 1: with your single digit i Q, and I just can't
Speaker 1: afford to have that happen I got shipped to do so. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so there's that. But then also in l A, I
Speaker 1: mean it's a it's a dick desert. Yeah, because you're
Speaker 1: he's a dick desert. You know, there's a lot of pussy,
Speaker 1: very few dick. You're right, I did make that observation,
Speaker 1: and I've only visited there for like dick it all
Speaker 1: or like acceptable acceptable dick, which to me is only
Speaker 1: a dick that matters. Intelligent dick. But you're coming into that.
Speaker 1: You're very smart. You went to an ivy Leak school,
Speaker 1: so it's like I feel like to find do you
Speaker 1: have to find someone equaling your intelligence? When I say
Speaker 1: intelligent dick, I don't even necessarily mean like intellectual, I
Speaker 1: just mean like, can you read this situation properly? Can
Speaker 1: you read a book like you read? Can you write?
Speaker 1: Which is? Do you read more than magazines? Like I
Speaker 1: mean that is that would be nice, But can you
Speaker 1: even read the situation? Probably? Like can you read that?
Speaker 1: Like I don't want to be with you and you
Speaker 1: don't want to be with me, and that's fine. So
Speaker 1: we should be able to just like do this in
Speaker 1: a respectful manner and consistently um, and not be able
Speaker 1: to and not be inconsiderate, like can we do that?
Speaker 1: So we can't even do that? What are some of
Speaker 1: your like what's like the dumbest thing you guys ever
Speaker 1: said you? Oh girl, we don't have time. So I've
Speaker 1: had some gems. Um well, one one, I just simply
Speaker 1: remember being on a date and the guy was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: Stevie Wonder is overrated, and I was like, I gotta go.
Speaker 1: I've never heard that before. I was not a white guy.
Speaker 1: I've never dated a white guy. Oh interesting, but just
Speaker 1: you don't eat, not into it or um well one,
Speaker 1: I've never even been really hit on by a white guy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I have a bit where I talk like
Speaker 1: a dog very. I mean I have a bit where
Speaker 1: like I talked about the fact that like when white
Speaker 1: guys on me, if they have, it's like I don't
Speaker 1: realize it until later, you know, because like the method
Speaker 1: is different, Like white guy like a black guy. You
Speaker 1: and it's like what's up? And you know what that
Speaker 1: what's up means? White guy is like can I offer
Speaker 1: you some tea? You're like, I didn't realize until later
Speaker 1: than you did. Yeah, like that hot beverage was Penis.
Speaker 1: When you're like no, they're like exactly, Like I was
Speaker 1: so kind, and you know I've been so I've never
Speaker 1: had the closest. I mean, I made out with an
Speaker 1: Israeli in Germany. For you a bond an aryan Israeli
Speaker 1: in Berlin, so you see this layers there. So that
Speaker 1: was the placest I've been. But no, I mean I
Speaker 1: had another guy. We were literally on a day and
Speaker 1: like in passing he said, um, yeah, you know, gay
Speaker 1: people are really ruining our children. No, I like that.
Speaker 1: He just said it as an aside whatever, because we
Speaker 1: look really good. God he's gay. That's literally like how
Speaker 1: it was frank because we had walked by like someone
Speaker 1: who was like, do you have time for gay rights?
Speaker 1: And he was like, these gays are ruining our children.
Speaker 1: And we were walking through a turn. We were walking
Speaker 1: through like a revolving door, and I literally just kept going,
Speaker 1: Like he went inside. I just kept going and came
Speaker 1: right back outside and got on the train and I
Speaker 1: got home. I got home and like thirty minutes later
Speaker 1: he texted me and said, oh, you're just gonna leave
Speaker 1: exactly You're quick. Yeah, those moments when a guy reveals himself.
Speaker 1: It's just a subtle thing or something like that, just
Speaker 1: like an aside. But it's like, man, I hate queers.
Speaker 1: You're like, wait, what I mean the last guy, like
Speaker 1: I fell in love with someone last summer and then
Speaker 1: we were in a strip club and he said, you know,
Speaker 1: my goals to one day have a house with no mirrors,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I'm out, Like so it gets
Speaker 1: through and let ship does that mean? Well, here's the thing.
Speaker 1: It's like there's always like there's always indicators that you've overlooked,
Speaker 1: you know, like I want to could take it as
Speaker 1: a this either means he's sucking nuts or maybe it
Speaker 1: syncrasy exactly. Like I went on a date with the
Speaker 1: finest man I've ever been out with ever in my
Speaker 1: life recently, and on the day he was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm just like I'm about to just go
Speaker 1: up in these agencies and just get a meeting with
Speaker 1: an agent so I can get representation. And I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's like that's not how it works, you know, and
Speaker 1: like your thirty five and like you're not a young man,
Speaker 1: like you've been in this business, you know. And he
Speaker 1: also at one point in the date said I do music. Oh,
Speaker 1: it wasn't like I do music? Do you do? You
Speaker 1: do you? Now? Do you do music? Music? Music? Do
Speaker 1: you do? It's probably just do so like stuff like that.
Speaker 1: I've reached a point though, where I've seen so much
Speaker 1: from the loser side of things that like, it really
Speaker 1: does take just one sentence for me to know, like
Speaker 1: even if it makes me not want to just recoil
Speaker 1: and leave, it lets me know like, well, this is
Speaker 1: never gonna be. Like even with my ex boyfriend that
Speaker 1: we were together for like two years, once he said
Speaker 1: to me, can you teach me how to DJ so
Speaker 1: we can do parties together? It took three months to
Speaker 1: break up. But that was when I knew, like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: there's nothing left here. I think every woman, especially on
Speaker 1: a first date, you know if it's gonna if you're like,
Speaker 1: for me, it's like the first minute I know whether
Speaker 1: this should continue or not. Well that's how I ended
Speaker 1: up falling in love with someone because they were they
Speaker 1: duped me essentially, you know what I mean, Because then
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, it was like weird, weird, weird, strange.
Speaker 1: I can handle strange, well, I can handle weird, But
Speaker 1: like when you tell me, you want a house mirror
Speaker 1: is that's just strange and there's titties right there, So
Speaker 1: why are you even in this frame of mind in
Speaker 1: a strip club? Like so when you a things like
Speaker 1: I just want to have a uniform of really expensive
Speaker 1: black shirts, what, it's just like doable, dude. I just
Speaker 1: I don't I hear stuff like that though, And because
Speaker 1: I've been around so many different types of guys, I
Speaker 1: can tell immediately when it's like, oh, you're clearly drowning
Speaker 1: in a puddle of your depthness, you know, like it
Speaker 1: sounds like that, those sounds sentences sound like examples of
Speaker 1: someone who's trying to be interested or like they read
Speaker 1: a book on like how to be artistic and interested.
Speaker 1: Like they're trying to be the male version of Zoe Deschanel,
Speaker 1: but it's not working. It's hard for them to be cute.
Speaker 1: And I feel like they're trying to be like the
Speaker 1: male version of like me, because I'm like, actually deep,
Speaker 1: because I do work that has depth, because I have
Speaker 1: to say like so they're like, I'm gonna say smart, smart,
Speaker 1: intelligent words. I mean, I dated a rapper whose name
Speaker 1: I won't say, Lupe, and he at one point was like,
Speaker 1: I just feel like I have to compete with your
Speaker 1: intellect and so but that's I mean, I would think
Speaker 1: that's like a channel to keep me on my toes
Speaker 1: and challenge me to be a better man. And you
Speaker 1: would think, you know, yeah, because when you especially when
Speaker 1: you do meet like really intelligent men that fucking get it,
Speaker 1: it's like not only is it like, okay, great, that's
Speaker 1: what I want, but it's like, oh my god, you
Speaker 1: rare Jim. Yes, and then you prop them up and
Speaker 1: then they hang you from the pedestal you put them on.
Speaker 1: It's got dark. So how how do you how what
Speaker 1: is it like? Or how do you start dating a rapper?
Speaker 1: Because this is like a dream that I think a
Speaker 1: lot of people have and then shatter it for us
Speaker 1: so no one makes that mistake. Well, one thing I
Speaker 1: will tell you, and this will be my third book.
Speaker 1: Your favorite rapper is a lame? Was he your favorite rapper? No?
Speaker 1: But everyone thinks that their favorite rapper is their hero.
Speaker 1: Your favorite rapper is a lame unless your favorite rapper
Speaker 1: is Bundy. Your favorite rapper is a lame. Well, you
Speaker 1: know the saying it that you never should meet your heroes,
Speaker 1: Like I you shouldn't. I hope to never, I mean,
Speaker 1: because I know Victoria Beckham is never going to live.
Speaker 1: He's smart. Kendrick and j Cole are both like nice guys.
Speaker 1: Oh that's good. They're like nice guys. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 1: they're strange because they're smart though too. They get it.
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's like it's a different level than
Speaker 1: like a fucking Yang Yang. Like you compare those two.
Speaker 1: Tell you this, So the Ying Yang Twins, Yes, one
Speaker 1: of them is you know, I think he has like
Speaker 1: maybe a learning disability, but the other one I was
Speaker 1: interviewing them. So how you end up dating rappers is
Speaker 1: I was a VJ on MTV, and then I was
Speaker 1: writing for Double Xcel and I was writing for the
Speaker 1: source you were in, so I was in the mix,
Speaker 1: you know. And then I was doing music myself. So
Speaker 1: I'm like on q tips last album. And I was
Speaker 1: touring with the and I was touring with Lupe when
Speaker 1: we were homies, and I was touring with Cool Kids,
Speaker 1: so with the Cool Kids, so like I was, I mean,
Speaker 1: I was very part of the world. And and the
Speaker 1: Gang Twins were on my show when I had a
Speaker 1: show on Serious Satellite Radio. They were on my show,
Speaker 1: and I was honestly being a dick, and I was like,
Speaker 1: let me just ask them some ship that they're not
Speaker 1: going to answer because I was so annoyed by the
Speaker 1: coonery of a Selt shaker. I was like, so, what
Speaker 1: do you feel about the presidency? And this was when
Speaker 1: George Bush was president, and I really thought that they
Speaker 1: were going to be like and just like wash over it.
Speaker 1: And one of them did, like he just kept going
Speaker 1: hat and then the other one was like, I didn't
Speaker 1: know what they mean that sound in real life, Yes
Speaker 1: they do. And the other guy came he was like,
Speaker 1: you see him like trying to size is he gonna
Speaker 1: just give away the secret? And he muted his partners
Speaker 1: mike so you couldn't have into the mike anymore. And
Speaker 1: then he was like looked at me and he was like,
Speaker 1: you know what, I really do have a problem with
Speaker 1: the fact that we are actually like devoting funds, you know,
Speaker 1: to this business of woman of Mars, when we can't
Speaker 1: even get our schools probably educated. And I'm like, wait
Speaker 1: what Like he had like a whole like a whole plan,
Speaker 1: and I mean, he had a very distinct point of
Speaker 1: view about the presidency and about fiscal policy and all
Speaker 1: this ship and after and I was like, what the hell,
Speaker 1: don't tell nobody. So he wanted to keep up that
Speaker 1: image because I mean, it's same like Little John, like
Speaker 1: that that Dave Chappelle's sketch with Little John accurate son,
Speaker 1: that is exactly how John is. It's a character, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know. And that's why I had to get like
Speaker 1: w c W stuff and wrestling and stuff. It's all,
Speaker 1: it's all. It's uh yeah, That's why I like in
Speaker 1: music because I knew that in order for me to
Speaker 1: get to the success that I would have considered to
Speaker 1: be like the success I wanted, I'd have to give
Speaker 1: up who because you're not say why why is it
Speaker 1: so sellable? And so like why do people like to
Speaker 1: hide their intelligence? Like it's that's in music a lot
Speaker 1: people don't want to hear, especially from rappers. I Will
Speaker 1: said that, like I don't want to hear you talk
Speaker 1: about anything smre what about intelligence ruins the persona of
Speaker 1: a rapper? In your opinion? I mean I think that
Speaker 1: there's also just like a very hardline ma cheesemo that
Speaker 1: is attached to rap and like it's really about like dominance,
Speaker 1: and you know, for for for a lot of people,
Speaker 1: it's more about brute force than actually intellectual force. And
Speaker 1: that's you know, that's a whole thing that has to
Speaker 1: do with even patriarchy and specifically the black community, and
Speaker 1: just this idea of like for a lot of time,
Speaker 1: intelligence and knowledge was literally like kept from us, like actively,
Speaker 1: like as a as an act of political defiance. We
Speaker 1: had to learn how to read, right. So I think
Speaker 1: for some people, like it's just not even in their
Speaker 1: purview as like an empowerment tool. And so that's a
Speaker 1: lot of the work that I do in my work
Speaker 1: is like trying to really like like being smart and
Speaker 1: knowing ship is just as powerful as being able to
Speaker 1: punch somebody in the face. You know. But for a
Speaker 1: lot of time we were only like valued for our
Speaker 1: physical strength. I mean that's literally what we were based
Speaker 1: on slavery, Like no one was buying a slave for
Speaker 1: their intellect, for sure, Like it was, it was true.
Speaker 1: So there's a cultural thing that comes down from that
Speaker 1: that ends up and ends up on some like you're
Speaker 1: almost inheriting the faults. You're inheriting the the ship from
Speaker 1: your captors and taking it in as culture, and so
Speaker 1: I feel like that's a constant thing and then you know,
Speaker 1: for what it's worth. Like in the hood, survival is
Speaker 1: more based on how much dominance you can have and
Speaker 1: muscle than an intellect for a lot of people, you know,
Speaker 1: I mean you you will see that, like at the
Speaker 1: end of the day, it's the smartest ones who end
Speaker 1: up making it out or who end up making the
Speaker 1: most money. But on the surface, it's like who can
Speaker 1: increase the most level of fear, that's a person that
Speaker 1: will survive, you know. And so so being that hip
Speaker 1: hop came out of that, it doesn't surprise me that
Speaker 1: that's a thing. But for me being in hip hop,
Speaker 1: like I knew there was an expiration date because like
Speaker 1: I'm a woman and I'm smart, Like these two things
Speaker 1: aren't valued in this space, which is a lot of
Speaker 1: my frustration with with hip hop, you know, whereas in comedy.
Speaker 1: Is not to say that being a woman and smart
Speaker 1: is like really valued in comedy, but but I definitely
Speaker 1: will say that, Like I feel like you have more
Speaker 1: of a my aritocracy in that place and on your intelligence,
Speaker 1: Like humor is intelligence too, and like you can people
Speaker 1: can approach humor from so many different aspects and an
Speaker 1: intelligent point of view is one of them, and so
Speaker 1: that works for you. That's perfect. How what is leaving it?
Speaker 1: Was it like did you leave with a bang? Were
Speaker 1: you like, I'm out? You changed my name? I was
Speaker 1: like yeah, And I when I turned thirty, Nick Cannon
Speaker 1: had come on a show. I've known Nick for a while,
Speaker 1: but he came on a show that I was doing
Speaker 1: it uh a o well, and he was like you
Speaker 1: need to get back into TV, Like what are you doing?
Speaker 1: And I was like and he was like, well, you
Speaker 1: should write a one woman show. And I was like, no, Nick,
Speaker 1: I need a TV show. That's what I need, you know.
Speaker 1: And then a year later I wrote a woman show.
Speaker 1: Yeah I definitely had to like follow it and I
Speaker 1: ended up writing woman show every year for four years.
Speaker 1: Oh so leg was amo of you, I love it? Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: I realized that like the world, for the little bit
Speaker 1: of the world that even knew I existed, only knew
Speaker 1: me for reading a prompter. And it was like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a good point. You have more to give than that.
Speaker 1: You have a lot to say too. So it's like
Speaker 1: a one woman shows such a great formula. What were
Speaker 1: the four shows about the first one was Death of
Speaker 1: the Diva, and that was about how reality TV had
Speaker 1: changed like the image of women in television and at
Speaker 1: that time, like what sparked it was I couldn't get
Speaker 1: work like at all for like two years, and every
Speaker 1: time because you just thought of as a DJ or
Speaker 1: well it was when reality TV had really like boomed,
Speaker 1: so Real Housewives, House you know, every time in a
Speaker 1: waiting room and one of those shows comes on and
Speaker 1: it's just women screaming at each other, I get I
Speaker 1: feel gross. Yes, I you're fucking disgusting, because it's like
Speaker 1: some producer egged them on to fucking fight and then
Speaker 1: got him pissed and filmed it and we're like, well,
Speaker 1: these women are crazy, and we buy into it, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. And like that's what I was
Speaker 1: kept being told, like, well, if you're not willing to
Speaker 1: do that, we don't really have anything like to do
Speaker 1: for you right now. And like we weren't like people
Speaker 1: weren't hiring hosts because like the content didn't even allow
Speaker 1: itself for that. So like I just couldn't get work
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, I guess I better, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Like so I wrote Death of the Diva. It's like,
Speaker 1: it's a musical and I do about a bunch of
Speaker 1: different characters. I love a musical. I love musical musical
Speaker 1: and guys, we fine, that was great. Nice. I don't
Speaker 1: even know why. The woman was like on the tip
Speaker 1: of my time. That was where I went. She's a
Speaker 1: very strong woman. I feel like she would have been
Speaker 1: great for guys with the musical Pope yeah whatever. So
Speaker 1: then um, the next one was And this is what
Speaker 1: got me into stand up is I wrote one woman's
Speaker 1: show called It's Complicated, hilarical answers to serious questions on love.
Speaker 1: And so when we did the first show, we did
Speaker 1: it at a theater and we raised money to do
Speaker 1: it to Indie Googo. But then I felt like theater
Speaker 1: is still like this thing that people feel like they
Speaker 1: don't have. Everyone doesn't feel they have access to, Like
Speaker 1: some people feel like, oh, that's for like swanky people,
Speaker 1: or that's for you know, Yeah, it's filling in an
Speaker 1: ivory tower, you know. Whereas comedy, everyone feels like they
Speaker 1: have access to comedy too much, too many people on
Speaker 1: the stage. It's fine, don't worry about it. Don't worry
Speaker 1: about it's fine. So I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: let me try and do this in a comedy club.
Speaker 1: And then randomly, like the stand reached out to me
Speaker 1: about coming to a show, and I was like, what's
Speaker 1: funny that you are asking me to come to the show,
Speaker 1: because actually want to do a show at your venue.
Speaker 1: And so I ended up working with them for a
Speaker 1: while and then um and then uh so I did
Speaker 1: that show there and it was actually like a really
Speaker 1: like strong success. And I did it for New York
Speaker 1: Comedy Festival New York Comedy Week where I put questions
Speaker 1: in the audience and then I'll be like, who ask
Speaker 1: question number one? And they'll ask the question and I
Speaker 1: respond with either a bit a character or like an
Speaker 1: interactive audience. Oh, that's really cool. So it's been really
Speaker 1: fun to do. We just did it in l A
Speaker 1: for the first time for Valentine's Day. I do it
Speaker 1: every Valentine's Day because I never have Valentine's Day plans,
Speaker 1: so I always make sure I have Valentine's Day plans
Speaker 1: and I do my show. And the third one was
Speaker 1: Mobeta Woo, where I took Wu Tang records and I
Speaker 1: took I turned them into jazz with this jazz virtuo.
Speaker 1: So Chris Bowers and I do it in the in
Speaker 1: the in the character that's a sixty one year old
Speaker 1: woman named Calandra b And this is amazing. Yeah, sounds
Speaker 1: like what damn it. It takes place in the community
Speaker 1: center of the Stapleton Projects, which is where the Woutane
Speaker 1: Plan is from on Staten Island. So we're actually in
Speaker 1: talks about like taking that to Broadway. So that's like,
Speaker 1: that's to me, that's like the greatest thing I've ever created.
Speaker 1: So I'm like really excited. Cool And now I know
Speaker 1: when a guy was like I just want to that
Speaker 1: resonates as like come out by so get out of
Speaker 1: you don't have time for that. You're doing too much.
Speaker 1: And uh, the last one with Side I seminar, which
Speaker 1: is identifying everybody from the sexism, Yeah, we wanted to
Speaker 1: talk more about that because there's it's us a lot
Speaker 1: about rape culture. Correct. Yes, I mean what it is
Speaker 1: is a lot of people don't know like basic ways
Speaker 1: that sexism a is permeated society. Like they just think
Speaker 1: of sexism as like you can't do this job because
Speaker 1: you're a woman, and that's where that's not that that
Speaker 1: doesn't get said in that way. No, it gets showed
Speaker 1: to us and told us in it's demonstrated in many
Speaker 1: different ways. And so when I did the cat calling
Speaker 1: um appearance on CNN and it went viral, Francesca Ramsey
Speaker 1: it texted me and was like, you need to do
Speaker 1: a lecture that's related to this, and people need to
Speaker 1: hear more, you know, from you about this, And so
Speaker 1: I created the Side I seminar. And so it's been
Speaker 1: really great to go to schools and be able to
Speaker 1: speak to like very diverse audiences. And when I say diverse,
Speaker 1: I don't just mean race, I mean gender as well,
Speaker 1: because the guys are who really need to hear this ship,
Speaker 1: but they have to be able to receive it in
Speaker 1: a palatable way. And it's so hard to get across
Speaker 1: this real ship to them in a way that's receptive
Speaker 1: to them, because it's so they turned off from the conversation.
Speaker 1: To get turned off, I get really fucking angry, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. So it's like, how do I
Speaker 1: get this to you? And so comedy has been just
Speaker 1: like this great vehicle that I've been driving now to
Speaker 1: really get things two people in different ways and with
Speaker 1: side I seminar. Like one of the best compliments I
Speaker 1: can get is when I'm done and like these guys
Speaker 1: come up to me and say like thank you, Like
Speaker 1: I get it. I've never got it before. I get
Speaker 1: it now, you know. And I think I'm also like
Speaker 1: for a strong dude, so you know, I can I
Speaker 1: can tap into like almost like a language base and
Speaker 1: a vernacular that is almost dude bro without without being condescending,
Speaker 1: because that's really important because the second you're condescending, and
Speaker 1: that's like a lot of those the conversations about that
Speaker 1: ship usually are. So it's like, well, they're not gonna
Speaker 1: fucking listen if you talk down to somebody like you
Speaker 1: attack exactly, Like yeah, you might think what they're saying
Speaker 1: is fucking stupid and it makes you angry, but you
Speaker 1: have to comedy. Man, If you make a smart joke
Speaker 1: about something you a fact will resonate into your the
Speaker 1: crevices of your brains so much harder. Well, I think
Speaker 1: people forget that we have to sell feminism, Like the
Speaker 1: branding on feminism, I think you're shitty. And it's like,
Speaker 1: as much as I don't want to take time to
Speaker 1: like sell it to people, like that's how it's going
Speaker 1: to catch on. Like we can't just be like do it.
Speaker 1: It's like other there's like so many different forms to
Speaker 1: like I've had feminists like attack me. That's every day,
Speaker 1: you know, because I'm because I was like, you know
Speaker 1: when when because you're not doing feminism right? No, man,
Speaker 1: that I'm not, I'm doing it wrong, which I'm like,
Speaker 1: isn't this your whole whatever? You know, like think I
Speaker 1: mean when I said that Kim Kardashian's paper magazine cover
Speaker 1: was not feminism, I had a slew of feminists like
Speaker 1: attack me because they were like, you're policing women's bodies, etcetera, etcetera.
Speaker 1: And all you said was it wasn't feminism. That doesn't
Speaker 1: mean it wasn't hot, that doesn't mean she has a
Speaker 1: nice but it just wasn't feminiely just wasn't. And stop
Speaker 1: naming things because it's convenient for you to name it.
Speaker 1: That she's doing that for the male gaze. That's what
Speaker 1: that's for. And even if you say to yourself, well,
Speaker 1: she's a woman, she can do whatever she wants, it's like, okay, well,
Speaker 1: in that you're not saying do whatever I want. By
Speaker 1: saying she exactly and you're not saying it's the word
Speaker 1: it's horrible and like shame on her at all. But
Speaker 1: they're taking it like they say it and that's what
Speaker 1: they hear. When she did that cover, did she come
Speaker 1: out and say I'm doing this for feminists. So that
Speaker 1: doesn't do that doesn't seem like I feel like Kim
Speaker 1: would be like fucking what, Well, she's doing it because
Speaker 1: she wants to do it, and that's fine, do whatever
Speaker 1: you want to do. But I'm also annoyed with the
Speaker 1: choices that you're making to do whatever you want to do.
Speaker 1: And I also like, I don't subscribe to this idea
Speaker 1: that says like if I'm showing my body that that's
Speaker 1: not subscribing to the male gaze, Like there is an
Speaker 1: actual correlation between like what you're doing and how it's
Speaker 1: affecting other things. And you can decide like I don't
Speaker 1: give a fuck, but you don't live in a vacuum either,
Speaker 1: so you have to acknowledge also that, like there are
Speaker 1: things that are going to happen as repercussions to this,
Speaker 1: and you have to know that and either you don't
Speaker 1: care or you do, but you can't act like it
Speaker 1: doesn't exist just because you decided it death. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: kind of like when you when you want to go
Speaker 1: out for a night or like go do do go?
Speaker 1: Like last night when I walked into your comedy comic, God,
Speaker 1: what do I want to wear? But every girl has
Speaker 1: that a little bit, like in high school. It's just
Speaker 1: something so simple of like do I want to wear
Speaker 1: this like low cut shirt? Because I know it's gonna
Speaker 1: And it's not them blaming as much as it's just know,
Speaker 1: do I want to put up with that or not? Well, so,
Speaker 1: do you feel there are instances where women can show
Speaker 1: their bodies in a sexual way where it's not kind
Speaker 1: of catering to the male gaze? I think that definitely,
Speaker 1: this definitely possible, and I think that that happens on
Speaker 1: a regular basis. I mean, when I'm on stage, I
Speaker 1: wear leggings, you know what I mean, and you're gonna
Speaker 1: be able to see my whole body, you know, And
Speaker 1: I'm not doing this for the purpose of like the
Speaker 1: male gaze. But there are times where women are you
Speaker 1: are not on the cover of Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue,
Speaker 1: you know, and that fucking the fucking Victoria's Secret commercials.
Speaker 1: That's there, you're advertising a product for us. I don't
Speaker 1: but I don't want to see some fucking incredibly unrealistically
Speaker 1: an attractive woman rolling around in a brawl unaware. That's
Speaker 1: not going to give me a buy that. But see
Speaker 1: I do like that because I would. I I know
Speaker 1: I'm smart enough to know I'm not gonna look like
Speaker 1: that in that. But I'm like, yeah, I forget what
Speaker 1: you're doing. But I'm just saying, don't say that. It
Speaker 1: doesn't also do that. Like I'm just saying, like, let's
Speaker 1: not act like, well, yeah, of course men like it,
Speaker 1: and that's gonna make men like go out and be
Speaker 1: like buy that for their girlfriends or wives or whoever.
Speaker 1: But there's this like thought process sometimes I feel where
Speaker 1: it's like there's a vacuum that gets existed in where
Speaker 1: we just feel like I'm just taking control of my
Speaker 1: sexuality and that's all that matters. And it's like that
Speaker 1: there's that, But like when I hear people being like
Speaker 1: twelve year olds needs to take care of control of
Speaker 1: their sexuality, and I'm like, no, they're what, twelve year
Speaker 1: olds didn't have sex. That's how I feel. I feel
Speaker 1: like you're twelve, live your life. Were you the one
Speaker 1: putting out that targeted Uh well yeah, no, there was this.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, I showed Christina this. There was a target
Speaker 1: ad just like showing like some new styles for like
Speaker 1: spring for kids for kids. Yeah, and there's and and there.
Speaker 1: They have like loose shorts on, like you know, Jim
Speaker 1: style shorts, like the old school basketball shorts. And then,
Speaker 1: just because I wanted to ruin my day, I read
Speaker 1: the Facebook comments and there's this whole argument going on
Speaker 1: about how the shorts are too short. I can't believe
Speaker 1: they made these styles, like just sexualizing these It was
Speaker 1: the most charming picture of just a bunch of people,
Speaker 1: every race, It was every hap. They were just loving targeting.
Speaker 1: There were sequence it was lovely. There was no number one.
Speaker 1: There was nothing wrong with the outfits to begin with.
Speaker 1: And then it was just a bunch of mostly I
Speaker 1: gotta say women, just having a conversation about how the
Speaker 1: shorts were too short, about how little girls are basically
Speaker 1: like slut for wake wearing this stuff. And then and
Speaker 1: then one lady stepped in and goes, I don't want
Speaker 1: trans people in my bathroom. It's like, what is it,
Speaker 1: and then someone actually replied, like, what is that to
Speaker 1: even doing this? And I were not trans? People have
Speaker 1: been in your bathroom? Yeah, I know the whole time,
Speaker 1: because what do you what do they have to they
Speaker 1: have to have to year name and chick And if
Speaker 1: someone comes in your bathroom to harm you, they're not trans,
Speaker 1: They're a rapist. Like that's what that is. It's just yeah,
Speaker 1: so that's a whole other It's just it's hard to
Speaker 1: h well. That's one of the things I loved about
Speaker 1: that CNN piece was I would have long I was
Speaker 1: telling Crant like, if that were me and that fucking guy,
Speaker 1: I'm like, is he fake? Did someone give him a script?
Speaker 1: And and I'm gonna tell you why. You wouldn't have
Speaker 1: lost it because you didn't realize it was even coming,
Speaker 1: Like I honestly, you know, I was saying that I
Speaker 1: thought I was waiting for the JK. Yeah, so was I.
Speaker 1: That's why I was asking did they give him a script?
Speaker 1: I hired I was coming to discuss cat calling, not
Speaker 1: to debate like whether or not it's a good positive thing.
Speaker 1: I thought we were coming to just discuss. We were
Speaker 1: going to discuss the prevalence of it around this video
Speaker 1: and just how it takes place, and you know the
Speaker 1: ways in which it can take place, and you know
Speaker 1: women's different responses to it. That's what I thought we
Speaker 1: were coming to discuss. I didn't even research this guy,
Speaker 1: so it was, honestly to my surprise when he had
Speaker 1: like very ardent I'm gonna get mad at women for
Speaker 1: not complimenting men, I'm like, get the funk off. If
Speaker 1: you don't want to be cat called, get a gun.
Speaker 1: That was an actual statement. What was his background? Why
Speaker 1: did they call him in? He has these books about
Speaker 1: men and how to like be the bad guy, the
Speaker 1: bad boy, like dating a bad boy. It's like these
Speaker 1: like how bad could it be? No, not that piece
Speaker 1: clear worst, but it was interesting because I was genuinely
Speaker 1: like I didn't even know that this existed, you know,
Speaker 1: like I didn't even know. And that's when I that
Speaker 1: was the last time I was on CNN, because I
Speaker 1: was like, why would we buy your choice or did
Speaker 1: they not? I was gonna say that that was a
Speaker 1: great because I was like, this is I mean, it
Speaker 1: was from my career, but yeah, but yeah, yeah, and
Speaker 1: that's happened a lot, like and this is this is
Speaker 1: not the kind of thisscourse, this discourse doesn't help anybody. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, like just get people piste off book. So
Speaker 1: if we're not going to be having like valuable discourse,
Speaker 1: then this is just reality TV news, like that's what
Speaker 1: it is. And so you know, I don't appreciate that.
Speaker 1: I mean, I flipped it into my own success, you know,
Speaker 1: but for what it's worth, like in the bigger picture
Speaker 1: of things, I don't think that helped moved I don't
Speaker 1: think that for the people that needed to have that
Speaker 1: conversation needed to hear that. I don't necessarily know if
Speaker 1: it moved the needle for them, you know. I think
Speaker 1: that what ended up happening was I was able to
Speaker 1: turn that into an opportunity for me to go to
Speaker 1: schools and talk to some young men who need to
Speaker 1: know about that. So that's good. But they wanted it
Speaker 1: to be more respectable spectacle instead of discussion. And that's
Speaker 1: to me, like because TV just I mean, and and
Speaker 1: and in all of my work, it's like, how do
Speaker 1: we do things that that has to have a discussion
Speaker 1: and not a spectacle Like we just did season two
Speaker 1: of my web series, and you know, it's like it's
Speaker 1: a show that's about me moving to l A as
Speaker 1: a as a comic from New York moving to l
Speaker 1: A and just trying to figure it out. And there's
Speaker 1: like all this crazy ship that happens just in the
Speaker 1: l A zeitgeist of things I can't even imagine because
Speaker 1: just from visiting, I'm like, I mean even just having
Speaker 1: like I may have had a casting director say to
Speaker 1: me like you're you're excessively exotic, you know, like things
Speaker 1: like that get said to you, and You're just like,
Speaker 1: how is this even a thing? You know, like the
Speaker 1: audition is that you get asked to go on, Like
Speaker 1: I mean, I went on an audition and the right
Speaker 1: up the breakdown said, you are a you dropped out
Speaker 1: of college because you realize you were intellectually above it.
Speaker 1: And you're applying for this personal assistant job. And she's sassy,
Speaker 1: of course, and uh, has there ever been a role
Speaker 1: for a black woman was not described? Just just stop
Speaker 1: using it? Another one sassy and um and knows herself
Speaker 1: and is knowledgeable. Okay. So then I'm reading the sides,
Speaker 1: and like, casually in the sides, I mentioned that I
Speaker 1: was a heroin Addict, So I'm a single parent obviously, God,
Speaker 1: and I've spent time in jail. That's a lot of
Speaker 1: spend time in jail, sassy. And then I had to
Speaker 1: like be on the phone and as if I was
Speaker 1: speaking to a customer service agent, I'm like, oh, do
Speaker 1: you want me to spell it? It's um D is
Speaker 1: in detention. I don't like there this p is in
Speaker 1: prison and as in n word that was written and
Speaker 1: that was the line yes, And I was like, that's
Speaker 1: for a TV show. I mean, who cares, but like
Speaker 1: her television network. But it was like a legit, like
Speaker 1: uh oh yes, fuck that was it a comedy about
Speaker 1: how white people try to write scripts about black lives.
Speaker 1: That's what it became my actual life because I was like,
Speaker 1: I don't know what we're trying to go over there?
Speaker 1: I mean that was that seems very over the top.
Speaker 1: What are you doing? And I had to like I was,
Speaker 1: I just had to make a choice, like I'm going
Speaker 1: to come in here and play this exactly the opposite,
Speaker 1: you know. And what ended up happening was the casting
Speaker 1: director was like, thank you, because you've been trying to
Speaker 1: get across the production that this is racist perfect okay.
Speaker 1: But if I hadn't been the type of person I am.
Speaker 1: I don't think anybody else went in there and said
Speaker 1: it was racist. Yeah, because they don't want to. It's
Speaker 1: too cut throat. And that's why you so many times
Speaker 1: I see uh, black people saying stuff on TV and
Speaker 1: I'm like, why do you agree to say that? That's right?
Speaker 1: Why did you? And it's because like you're just trying
Speaker 1: to get to get a legend and the food in
Speaker 1: and so, like you know, like trying to so like
Speaker 1: with the web series, I'm like trying to address stuff
Speaker 1: like that and like not and like show that like
Speaker 1: it's not a spectacle, Like this is everyday regular stuff,
Speaker 1: you know, and like you know, like how Zoe Saldana
Speaker 1: ends up in black face, Like how how? And that
Speaker 1: seems like a spectacle, But that happens very easily by
Speaker 1: someone being like, you know what you should do? You
Speaker 1: know what you could do that, and then you're like,
Speaker 1: I could do that, and that's how it happen, and
Speaker 1: that's how it happens, you know. And so it's like
Speaker 1: in the series, we also like talk about like social
Speaker 1: media because people think that like you're at home like
Speaker 1: plotting your tweets and ship, and it's like I will
Speaker 1: send a tweet and then go about my business and
Speaker 1: come back and my phone is in shambles. You know,
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, what about what? Well the Kim Kardashian
Speaker 1: thing was one, Like what all you said was that
Speaker 1: wasn't a feminist cover three days? So does she have
Speaker 1: like a cult following the way like Beyonce does or
Speaker 1: these weren't these weren't even Yeah, then I had feminists
Speaker 1: never stick up for Kim Kardashian because honestly, like we
Speaker 1: just bullshit. We we talk a lot in this podcast
Speaker 1: about like, all right, we don't need to just destroy
Speaker 1: the whole Kardashian family like they're just doing their own
Speaker 1: thing whatever, But then everyone always yells at us for
Speaker 1: defending the Kardashians. All we're saying is like, how do
Speaker 1: want us to feel about the Kardashians. I don't know,
Speaker 1: Let please let us know if they annoy you, totally fine,
Speaker 1: don't want Yeah, I don't think. I wasn't trying to
Speaker 1: be like she's adding a lot to society. I was
Speaker 1: just like just stop. I don't know. I just think
Speaker 1: it's not great to all attack a woman for no reason.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think the frustration is that they
Speaker 1: actively find themselves in our faces with nothingness and what
Speaker 1: that does to me with that, why that frustrates me.
Speaker 1: And of course there's more people at work here that
Speaker 1: are giving them the platform to do that, right, So
Speaker 1: it's not just that, but what it also does to
Speaker 1: me that is it lowers the standard like overall of
Speaker 1: like what even is expecting, what even we should be strive,
Speaker 1: what we could strive for as women, Like well, is
Speaker 1: it kind of like the Yanyang Twin thing where it's
Speaker 1: like they're probably smarter than that, but they're putting on
Speaker 1: this character like I don't know, Courtney, you're such a bit,
Speaker 1: but they like they're doing that because that's what sends
Speaker 1: this message. I don't know that can't be smarter, but
Speaker 1: Chloe definitely. Yeah, I feel like it just sends this
Speaker 1: message that says like you don't have to really be
Speaker 1: strived to be hot. Yeah, like just strive to be hot.
Speaker 1: And I don't agree with that. My issue with that
Speaker 1: is that that is simply just diminishing our women to objective,
Speaker 1: objective pieces in the male gaze. That's my issue, Like,
Speaker 1: like women like women who are people who will be
Speaker 1: who create stuff, whether it be podcast, books, TV, and
Speaker 1: I kind of like we've had discussions with networks before,
Speaker 1: like where they're asking us for something and we're like, yeah,
Speaker 1: we can give you that, and we're not saying women
Speaker 1: won't watch that. Women will watch that. But I remember
Speaker 1: I remember saying to someone like I think you're underestimating women.
Speaker 1: I think that if we do a piece on Ruth
Speaker 1: Bader Ginsburg and make it fun and interesting, that people
Speaker 1: won't turn the channel. It's not like women see like
Speaker 1: knowledge and they're like, what's that facts I don't get,
Speaker 1: Like yeah, it's like, well, like you know, we can't
Speaker 1: make up our own channels. We only have the channels
Speaker 1: that we have, and so it's like, yeah, will I
Speaker 1: watch that? Will that entertaining? Like I've certainly watched the Kardashians,
Speaker 1: but like if there was a better choice, like I
Speaker 1: might have watched. So that was that was our argument.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, you know, everyone a creator upset that
Speaker 1: we didn't shoot on them, and I'm like I don't.
Speaker 1: I mean I showed on them excessively. UM, So if
Speaker 1: you want to, I can't stand the lack of balance,
Speaker 1: Like that's what. I get frustrated, and I just get
Speaker 1: I just get frustrated with the fact that they're just
Speaker 1: like they're sully pisoned in this like space. Because then
Speaker 1: I speak to young women who look at them and
Speaker 1: like there's like an idolatry. Make it a point to
Speaker 1: look like that, like look like a Kardashian. We're watching
Speaker 1: it a little creepy. Yeah, we're watching it with a
Speaker 1: grain of salt. So I think that's different and and
Speaker 1: and so we're kind of spoiled in that way. Like
Speaker 1: I don't know, I just think of the Kardashian shows
Speaker 1: as like a reality version of Seinfeld, Like it's a
Speaker 1: show about enoughing. Like we've already talked about them more
Speaker 1: than I would like to write right now. Insecure. There's
Speaker 1: television that it's good. Oh yeah, we both watched the
Speaker 1: whole show. Show is so fucking good. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: And I saw that Solange was a fucking music consult
Speaker 1: and I was like, god damn it. So how did
Speaker 1: you get involved in that show when your agent sent
Speaker 1: you scripture? Like what what was that? So I originally
Speaker 1: went in for Tasha the bank Teller, and I was
Speaker 1: in the dress first of all, the Breakdown said hood hot.
Speaker 1: And I Textedsa because I was like, did you know
Speaker 1: that the Breakdown said hood hot? And she was like hilarious,
Speaker 1: and I was like, all right, so she's cool with it.
Speaker 1: But I also know that I'm not hood hot. So
Speaker 1: I was like, what body? Oh? I was thinking, I'm
Speaker 1: like a huge booty body. Okay, so you know I'm proportional.
Speaker 1: I've got some things, but they're not like you know,
Speaker 1: they're just they're solid. They're solid. And I always say,
Speaker 1: like I had ass on the low. You know, you
Speaker 1: don't know I got it till you got it. Yes,
Speaker 1: So I went in. I'm sitting in the in the
Speaker 1: waiting room and I'm looking around. I'm like, I ain't
Speaker 1: gonna book this, Like, look at these chicks is hot?
Speaker 1: I ain't. I ain't this. So I had to report
Speaker 1: with the casting director. Well, honestly, at this point, you know,
Speaker 1: I just keep it real with casting directors, like they
Speaker 1: probably appreciate that they listen. People will tell you don't
Speaker 1: be you know, don't be direct at LA doesn't like
Speaker 1: that bullshit. Listen. It's your life. So if you can
Speaker 1: do whatever you can to dictate it, do it. So
Speaker 1: I will be in there and be like, what do
Speaker 1: you want because I don't understand this character. Sometimes I
Speaker 1: have to say that, you know, because sometimes you'll get
Speaker 1: a breakdown that makes no sense. And I remember going
Speaker 1: in for one role where the woman literally came out
Speaker 1: and was like, listen, guys, I gotta cast this by
Speaker 1: the end of today, so I need you guys to
Speaker 1: figure it out. Now. This character, it is not her job.
Speaker 1: She's like this character and she tells us what she
Speaker 1: wants us to do. So then I raised my hand.
Speaker 1: I raised my hand. Everyone looks at me, and then
Speaker 1: she's like yes, And I was like, you do realize
Speaker 1: that what you've just described as the exact nithesis of
Speaker 1: what's in the breakdown? Correct? And there was just like
Speaker 1: hush where like all the air left room and she
Speaker 1: goes absolutely. She was like, and that's why I'm going
Speaker 1: and that's yeah, and that's what she said. She was like,
Speaker 1: that's why I'm losing it because the writers keep changing
Speaker 1: ship and I completely understand it. So at this point,
Speaker 1: just do whatever the funk you want. And it's good.
Speaker 1: If I had when she went in and would have
Speaker 1: been confused, actions were like thank you for something, Thank you,
Speaker 1: and I was like, you know, for for for Insecure.
Speaker 1: I went in and uh. I told the casting director.
Speaker 1: I was like, I can't play this. She was like, man,
Speaker 1: you can play anything, and I was like thank you,
Speaker 1: but I was like and hood hot, Like I just
Speaker 1: I that's not my sweet spot. I know that. And
Speaker 1: she was like what about those other role and I
Speaker 1: was like, there's another role and she was like yeah.
Speaker 1: So she told her assistant to show me the other
Speaker 1: role and he's like he pulls me outside and we
Speaker 1: look at the script. He's like, so it's early thirties
Speaker 1: ivy league graduate that my actual life. Yea. So she like,
Speaker 1: you know, you can come back tomorrow and I was like, no,
Speaker 1: I'll do it today. So I read the script. I'm
Speaker 1: really good at memorizing, so like in ten minutes, I
Speaker 1: came back and read it and she was like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, come on, let's go. So then I went
Speaker 1: in for the callback. The next week, did the callback,
Speaker 1: so that went fine, and then the next callback I
Speaker 1: had an anxiety attack. So that was but I don't
Speaker 1: know it was the second one. It was the same
Speaker 1: group of people. I don't know, well, you know what,
Speaker 1: the longer they string you and it's not a because
Speaker 1: I know it's several auditions to you more want yeah,
Speaker 1: And I think that was when I realized I wanted it.
Speaker 1: And it's like because at the second one, you're just
Speaker 1: like hype that you even got that far, even though
Speaker 1: I knew he said people, it's still just like, oh cool, callback,
Speaker 1: so you're more on adrenaline. But the third one, I'm
Speaker 1: in my head and I just thought I bombed, Like
Speaker 1: I just really really did think I bombed. And then
Speaker 1: Lisa had sent me a text like you know, thanks
Speaker 1: for coming in, and I'm just like a that audition.
Speaker 1: She was watching me at the second. And then they
Speaker 1: had said that there was gonna be a table read
Speaker 1: they were going to cast before the table read, and
Speaker 1: I had to go to Granada. I' from Granada, so
Speaker 1: I was about to go to Granada and I would
Speaker 1: have missed the table read, but they said that it
Speaker 1: didn't matter, but they said I would know before I
Speaker 1: went to Granada, and so then I went to Granada
Speaker 1: and there was nothing. So then I'm in Granada and
Speaker 1: I see that they're at the table read. What the fun?
Speaker 1: And I'm like, I get you know, And then I
Speaker 1: was like just just you know, you just get frustrated
Speaker 1: because you're like, damn, like I didn't even know that.
Speaker 1: I didn't even get it. And then and then I
Speaker 1: texted my agent and was like, oh, I just saw
Speaker 1: that online like that they're doing the table read, so
Speaker 1: I guess I didn't book it. And she was like, nah,
Speaker 1: they didn't even cast it yet. He just went ahead
Speaker 1: of the table read. So I was like, so I'm
Speaker 1: still in the game. So then I came back and
Speaker 1: we did a chemistry test, and the chemistry test is
Speaker 1: its own level of stress because one of those the
Speaker 1: chemistry test is stressful because it's not like you're just
Speaker 1: doing your ship, like there's a changing you with different folks,
Speaker 1: and so you're having to like see different people and
Speaker 1: you know you're just in the waiting area. Given scripts,
Speaker 1: you improv. It's a bit of both. So you do
Speaker 1: the script for this particular one, i'd read with the
Speaker 1: other three women that had already been cast, so he's
Speaker 1: save on Natasha, and then I had to do it
Speaker 1: just improv scene. Well, it was a written scene that
Speaker 1: turns into improv got it. So a written scene with
Speaker 1: the guy who plays my husband. So I did it
Speaker 1: with a couple of guys and um, that's what is that?
Speaker 1: What is that like doing a chemistry test, like to
Speaker 1: test for actual romantic chemistry? Do you have to force it?
Speaker 1: Like what you have to pretend the guy? Something's not
Speaker 1: if you're not attractive? One off, he says he wants
Speaker 1: to have a house with no mirror. Yeah, what do
Speaker 1: you do? What do you do? Well, it's acting. So
Speaker 1: I mean I had to do a chemistry test with
Speaker 1: Justin Long one time, which is like Owly's sweet. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but like I don't, I don't discuss, I never Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's not for you. Like I had to really work
Speaker 1: through that one. So this one, this one was interesting
Speaker 1: because it's that's wasn't really about romance as much as
Speaker 1: it was like how would you guys argue? How would
Speaker 1: the depth? What what would that look like? And the
Speaker 1: guy who ends up playing my husband, who's like my
Speaker 1: spirit animal way to Lane Marcus, I love you. Um
Speaker 1: he played it in such a different way than the
Speaker 1: other guys, Like the other guys like we met each
Speaker 1: other at yelling, whereas Way just was like I'll be quiet,
Speaker 1: oh and that's fun. And he just had this face
Speaker 1: of like I mean you could while out if you want. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And so that I was like, challenge nothing. It makes
Speaker 1: you more furious than someone who will be stay quiet
Speaker 1: during And I just remember he had this just this
Speaker 1: stance in the seat of like I'm where I'm at. Yeah, yeah, cocky,
Speaker 1: I'm where I'm at. What you're doing? And uh and
Speaker 1: the other The other like crazy part about that was
Speaker 1: that they didn't have They were in like a new
Speaker 1: office where they didn't have enough room for us to
Speaker 1: be in like a waiting room once we went over
Speaker 1: to the space, so you had to sit outside and
Speaker 1: listen to everyone else's oh god, which is incredibly nere recking.
Speaker 1: And there's people that know them, so they come in
Speaker 1: the room and it's like, oh my god. It's so
Speaker 1: you're just like, why am I even hear you? Guys
Speaker 1: are best easy. It's like any little thing sensitive to
Speaker 1: when you're that close to it. So I was I
Speaker 1: was driving on the four oh five and no, I
Speaker 1: was driving on the one on one. I was driving
Speaker 1: on the one on l A like mean, yeah, we
Speaker 1: don't say that. I was driving and I got a
Speaker 1: text that was like and me and you heard it,
Speaker 1: but then you pulled over and see it later for safety.
Speaker 1: She texted me white applause hands and this is our
Speaker 1: joke because I'm just like, I didn't know how to
Speaker 1: take that, because I was like, what a white applause
Speaker 1: hands me? I don't know, is that like a thanks
Speaker 1: for coming yes? And I was like, is that a
Speaker 1: thanks for coming in? That seems mean if she's your friend,
Speaker 1: though really my friend, she's an acquaintance. I mean she
Speaker 1: at this point, she's a business acquaintance. I mean she's
Speaker 1: a homie, you know what I'm saying. But it's also
Speaker 1: just polite, like at that point in the in the
Speaker 1: audition process, you know me well enough to be like,
Speaker 1: thanks for coming in, you know, I mean like you
Speaker 1: did a great job. Because I also didn't like it
Speaker 1: could have just been like a great job. We haven't
Speaker 1: made the decision yet, great job. She had already texted
Speaker 1: me great job before, you know, so maybe this was something.
Speaker 1: And I hit her back, and I was I hit
Speaker 1: her back. I was like, I don't understand why the
Speaker 1: plause hands. I don't know how to take this, and
Speaker 1: she's like, oh, I'm on an android, but we don't
Speaker 1: have color hands yet, and uh, and she was like
Speaker 1: you got it, and I was like, I mean I
Speaker 1: almost gotten a griss in it, Like it was. I
Speaker 1: mean it was because I've been working along time in
Speaker 1: lateral positions like and my mom would always be like
Speaker 1: a man, that you are working here, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: but I'm not doing anything that's getting me over the hump,
Speaker 1: Like I'm hosting this stuff. I'm getting little checks here
Speaker 1: and there. You know, I'm in the I'm in the
Speaker 1: face of people for what it's worth, but like, I'm
Speaker 1: not doing anything of like a major value that is
Speaker 1: going to be able to advance my voice and advance
Speaker 1: my my ideas, you know. And so it was like
Speaker 1: once I booked this, I knew, like, you've now booked
Speaker 1: something that has like value and this huge show. I
Speaker 1: turned it on and I saw you, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, so you're so good at it.
Speaker 1: It's so acing to just even see someone who you know,
Speaker 1: you know a little bit, you've seen it around up
Speaker 1: shows that you've been doing it. And I think it's
Speaker 1: really nice because if you're like, Okay, this this can happen.
Speaker 1: It is possible that such a good show, like to
Speaker 1: be on a show that you funk with that you
Speaker 1: would watch it regardless, and like you do pilot season
Speaker 1: and you audition for all these shows, and you'd be
Speaker 1: happy to get on any of the these shows. Like
Speaker 1: let's be fucking real, like matter, Yeah, like you got
Speaker 1: a job. So to be in a position where I
Speaker 1: finally like got this job that that isn't just a job,
Speaker 1: you know, Like I just got bumped up to series right,
Speaker 1: because isn't your reality so real housewives sucking bullshit, no
Speaker 1: thought put into it. No, it's a real show that
Speaker 1: has value. And now like with the series regular title,
Speaker 1: like you get more money, you get more of screen time,
Speaker 1: you get more ability to like get into your role
Speaker 1: and really like make this role and iconic role, you know,
Speaker 1: like I want people to say at some point like
Speaker 1: you're being such a Tiffany, Like I want them to
Speaker 1: do that, you know what I mean. And so I
Speaker 1: really appreciate art writers for even like giving me the
Speaker 1: space to do that, like giving me lines that get
Speaker 1: that get to do that because listen, you're at the
Speaker 1: behest of your writers really like they are who are
Speaker 1: described defining so much of what you get to like
Speaker 1: walk away with. And so what I love about our
Speaker 1: writers is like they create these characters that have enough
Speaker 1: of a solid ground but enough of a room for
Speaker 1: you to like go to the moon, you know. So
Speaker 1: like episode eight, like I really got to like show
Speaker 1: my chat and it was such a good episode. It's
Speaker 1: like so funny to me how people are like yo,
Speaker 1: like I didn't recognize you, and I'm like, that's acting, yeah,
Speaker 1: like because it's the role is so act like it's
Speaker 1: so opposite of me, y'all. Yeah. Well, And I was
Speaker 1: just so excited for that show. When I saw the
Speaker 1: first preview, I was watching you know, girls or something,
Speaker 1: and and I was like, Okay, this looks like a
Speaker 1: great show. I liked it because it was marketed as
Speaker 1: just a show, not not not in a black show.
Speaker 1: We have a black show for you. It was just
Speaker 1: a show. And I'm I mean, as soon as it
Speaker 1: came out we both watched, I was like, this is
Speaker 1: and it was great, and it was just like, Okay,
Speaker 1: it's just so refreshing to see to see women portrayed
Speaker 1: on television and they're not they're they're the you could
Speaker 1: tell the writers are not condescending, talking down to it's
Speaker 1: just pure Yeah. And I think to like do you.
Speaker 1: I'm curious if you get talked down to a lot,
Speaker 1: because I feel like that I would imagine that happens,
Speaker 1: especially when people are like, oh you want to like, oh,
Speaker 1: you're like dreams are really cute. Like I just feel like, well,
Speaker 1: that's what I actually will say, fucking driving nuts. I
Speaker 1: feel like I was getting that in New York and
Speaker 1: I feel like yeah, and I feel like l A
Speaker 1: has this reputation for that, but I definitely feel like
Speaker 1: enough New Yorkers have gone to l A now where
Speaker 1: like it's not like it hasn't been that way. What's
Speaker 1: been really interesting and encouraging and inspiring about being in
Speaker 1: l A is that all these idiosyncrasies that I had
Speaker 1: that seemed like flaws in New York are like lauded
Speaker 1: in l A. So like the fact that I'm incredibly
Speaker 1: meticulous and work really hard and don't like give up,
Speaker 1: people in l A are like, finally, thank you, you know,
Speaker 1: because there's so much there's so much energy of like
Speaker 1: just wait and see that happens in l A, like
Speaker 1: just chill out and wait and see. And you know,
Speaker 1: I'm somebody who's like I'm not coming here to like
Speaker 1: get made into a star. I'm coming here to make
Speaker 1: myself into what I planned to be. So like when
Speaker 1: I got to l A, I started doing my own
Speaker 1: comedy shows, like it was like that's how I'm going
Speaker 1: to take control on step And so people would be like, well,
Speaker 1: how do you break in? It's like you bust through
Speaker 1: the fucking door, Like you make your own doorway, Like
Speaker 1: that's how. And so even for like Issa, Issa and
Speaker 1: I know each other because of my work, not because
Speaker 1: I was like, hey, can I be on your show?
Speaker 1: It was because hey, I have a show. My first
Speaker 1: season of my web series Get Your Life was on
Speaker 1: Issa's channel on YouTube, and she was like, yo, people
Speaker 1: come to me all the time with like I want
Speaker 1: to do a show, and they never do the show.
Speaker 1: And she's like, you're one of the few people who
Speaker 1: actually like said you were gonna do something and did it.
Speaker 1: And that's how, like you end up turning people who
Speaker 1: seemed like idols into colleagues. And so for me, it's
Speaker 1: like a really exciting time in my life to like
Speaker 1: be in a room now with folks and it's like
Speaker 1: we're not I'm not a hiring to like be where
Speaker 1: you are, Like I'm planning like you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: and it's mutual respect. And in New York it just
Speaker 1: got to a point where it felt like I'm doing
Speaker 1: dope stuff and people are going, that's dope and they
Speaker 1: walk away, Whereas in l A at this point it
Speaker 1: feels like you do something dope and people go, how
Speaker 1: can we make more for this? How can we make
Speaker 1: this dope? There every there, and there's producers, Like there's
Speaker 1: people who are who are actively taking ideas and putting
Speaker 1: them to practice in a different way than you had
Speaker 1: it on paper, like you know, like they're taking it
Speaker 1: off the paper and putting it into the world and
Speaker 1: into the universe. And that's now where I am, Like,
Speaker 1: I am in a position now where it's like, okay,
Speaker 1: next step is to start doing that for people, like
Speaker 1: taking people's ideas bringing it to reality outside of like
Speaker 1: just this on paper version. And as a black woman creative,
Speaker 1: it's imperative that we have as many of us doing
Speaker 1: that on both sides of the table. You know, we
Speaker 1: need exacts, we need executives that understand and I hate
Speaker 1: the word diversity at this point, but that understand it,
Speaker 1: understand that like authenticity and the story are what matter.
Speaker 1: That's what people watch for, you know people, And that's
Speaker 1: why when it's like sassy black Girl on the Breakdown,
Speaker 1: you're like, no, no, we can do better than this,
Speaker 1: because I can smell phony. It's even in comedy. That's
Speaker 1: why they even just like you don't see like so
Speaker 1: much jokes anymore when you go to a comedy show
Speaker 1: on stage, like you don't see like set up punchline.
Speaker 1: You see like this is my story. This is what's
Speaker 1: funny about it, because people were just tired of like
Speaker 1: these really contrived pieces of comedy, like I'm tired of
Speaker 1: contrived pieces of men, Like that's what I'm tired of.
Speaker 1: Like that's honestly what is really the problem that l
Speaker 1: A's Like so many of the guys out there are
Speaker 1: that are literally like this is where I'm supposed to
Speaker 1: be this kind of person, And so I came out
Speaker 1: to l A so I could be like this kind
Speaker 1: of person like they're playing pretend, Like you watched Entourage
Speaker 1: too many times, like I'm supposed to be like this
Speaker 1: or my favorite. I literally had a man tell me
Speaker 1: you can't be my priority right now because I need
Speaker 1: to be obsessed with myself like that was words that
Speaker 1: left somebody's mouth like to my face while I was
Speaker 1: standing here, and I was supposed to make you feel better, yes,
Speaker 1: and so like you know when when you are authentic
Speaker 1: and genuine, like that's it's so repulsive, you know, And
Speaker 1: like because in my work life, I'm not even dealing
Speaker 1: with that in my work life because I don't have
Speaker 1: people anymore, like I mean I had. I had a
Speaker 1: manager in New York literally tell me the road isn't
Speaker 1: for women? What what road? Like comedy? Going on the road. Oh,
Speaker 1: I felt even like this like a journey, yeah, for women,
Speaker 1: because the road is for no one. Honestly. I was like,
Speaker 1: I need to be doing dates, I need to be
Speaker 1: out here. And he was like, yeah, well that's not
Speaker 1: for you. Though, that's not for you. I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: first of all, don't tell me what's for me. I was, yeah,
Speaker 1: I was like, how would that person know what is
Speaker 1: for you? You know, if I say it's for me,
Speaker 1: it's for me, and if I and and if it
Speaker 1: turns out it's not for me, I'll learn that. But
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be the one who says that, you know,
Speaker 1: we get there, see you later, you know, And uh,
Speaker 1: I have had one person tell me in in l A.
Speaker 1: She was like, you know, so what's your plan? I said, well,
Speaker 1: I want to have a multi plat multimedia mocal dum,
Speaker 1: you know, in the same vein as like a Chelsea Handler.
Speaker 1: I may not agree with Chelsea handlers per view, but
Speaker 1: I do agree with like the build what she's built
Speaker 1: for herself. And she's done so based on her point
Speaker 1: of view. So she has this like multimedia platform, whether
Speaker 1: it's books, she's genuine and it's what and it's who
Speaker 1: she is, right, So that's what I want. I want
Speaker 1: it built on who I am. And she was like, well,
Speaker 1: I mean, how are you going to do that? And
Speaker 1: I was like, aude, right, I was like, well, I
Speaker 1: mean I'm going to chip away at the marble like
Speaker 1: that's what we're doing. And she's like, well, unless you're
Speaker 1: gonna an executive, I mean, I don't understand how you're
Speaker 1: going to make that happen. What wait? What? Wait? Was
Speaker 1: she somebody I met in a work space who does
Speaker 1: help in the people. But it was like, and it's
Speaker 1: her job to help people with her she just does
Speaker 1: her job by shooting down your dream and that's well,
Speaker 1: I'm only interested in working with people who see that plan,
Speaker 1: who see that goal and immediately go into planned mode. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Anyone who feels like that goal is far fetched is
Speaker 1: not is not who you want to work with at all. Man.
Speaker 1: That's uh, you know. I always thought like that's such
Speaker 1: a stereotypical thing to say, like or like in a
Speaker 1: movie script or TV script or like, well you gotta
Speaker 1: sleep your way into the top, Amanda, like people actually
Speaker 1: saying that, but people actually do do that. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: we Karen and I were on the road and we
Speaker 1: uh got talked down to by men, grown men, probably
Speaker 1: forty plus in a way. It's so enough times where
Speaker 1: I was like, is this the fucking Twilight Zone? It
Speaker 1: was just solid. I didn't know that it was, yeah,
Speaker 1: because Dallas didn't happen. But Dallas was lovely and the
Speaker 1: audiences were great, but the people outside of the venue
Speaker 1: or anyone who wasn't at our show was terrible. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I almost felt like, to be honest, you know,
Speaker 1: and I'm I'm very I'm very open if I hate
Speaker 1: the people at our show right to their face. So
Speaker 1: that's not that would happen. To be really lovely they were,
Speaker 1: but the men it said stuff to us. We're like, wait,
Speaker 1: what are you wait? Like I couldn't believe it. Sometimes
Speaker 1: people talk to women like their children because I'm a
Speaker 1: little my great thing. You can't do anything. I mean,
Speaker 1: I know, I think some times people do think like that,
Speaker 1: I'm still in my twenties, which thank you, but also
Speaker 1: that you shouldn't be talking to women in their twenties
Speaker 1: like that. I mean, you shouldn't be talking to anyone
Speaker 1: over the age of six, I would say. I mean,
Speaker 1: I was recently at a show where I was talking
Speaker 1: to the booker and like the server who was taking
Speaker 1: my order had come up to ask me a question,
Speaker 1: and the book I was like, this is when you disappear.
Speaker 1: Oh he said that to the server, and I was like,
Speaker 1: there's no need for you to talk to her like that,
Speaker 1: Like you can converse with me without being disrespectful to her. Right.
Speaker 1: People trying to do it like it, like it makes
Speaker 1: them look cool and important. And then so when you
Speaker 1: the person he's trying to look cool and important for,
Speaker 1: say that, then you just look like a chump all around.
Speaker 1: And it's great. I mean, but this is current's favorite moments.
Speaker 1: This is why there are no guys I fucked, Like
Speaker 1: this is why, because I can't. I can't take it anymore,
Speaker 1: Like I just I can't take it anymore, like I
Speaker 1: really have. Just so listen, it's not for lack of trying. Yeah, Okay,
Speaker 1: I would love to suck a dick, but I can't.
Speaker 1: You gotta to want to suck that dick. That dick's
Speaker 1: gotta not want to be in a house with no mirror.
Speaker 1: You can't need I need to give me something. I'll
Speaker 1: be thirty six this year, and honestly, I'm at this
Speaker 1: point where it's like, if you're not coming at me
Speaker 1: like I'm coming at you, what are we doing? Like
Speaker 1: I don't I'm not doing the like let's just like
Speaker 1: enjoy each other company. Yeah, like no, like you need
Speaker 1: to come at me with an intention. That's why I
Speaker 1: like being getting older, Like I feel like with every year,
Speaker 1: that idea, that concept of like don't waste my time,
Speaker 1: you spot bullshit quicker, and it's just it's it's like
Speaker 1: is more fun because you don't put up with ship.
Speaker 1: You don't put up with it. And I mean, I
Speaker 1: I would love to have someone who on a rainy day,
Speaker 1: it's like I can call them and it's like we
Speaker 1: don't have attized we don't have like commitment tized to
Speaker 1: each other, but we enjoy each other's company and you
Speaker 1: come through and we hang out and whatever happens happens.
Speaker 1: I would love to be able to do that, but
Speaker 1: it's like there's still this like sense of ego that
Speaker 1: is so attached to a lot of these guys, where
Speaker 1: like they can't even fathom that you would be able
Speaker 1: to do that and not want to marry that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like I don't. I can very clearly delineate who I
Speaker 1: would get attached to and who I would not get
Speaker 1: attached to, but they're still so caught up and at
Speaker 1: the end of the day, like I just can't take
Speaker 1: in consideration. It is the most pussy drying activity ever
Speaker 1: for me, Like my time is just important to me.
Speaker 1: So like when you can't even conceptualize that, like we
Speaker 1: made a plan and you just don't care, Like I'll
Speaker 1: let that happen twice after that we're bye bye bye.
Speaker 1: So you know, it's it's so so I've I've, I've
Speaker 1: I've definitely Like I was coming on the show and
Speaker 1: I was like, I don't even know guys have to
Speaker 1: talk about like I refuse the fun comedians because they're
Speaker 1: just rappers with no money. That's really true. What are
Speaker 1: we doing? Wow? A collective side? Yeah, because you know,
Speaker 1: I think whenever and anybody else is about feminism. Like
Speaker 1: every time we could do an interview, everyone's like, what's
Speaker 1: your definition of feminism? And why do people think it's weird?
Speaker 1: And you know, I feel like we've talked. I've never
Speaker 1: talked about feminism so much, and but in that it's
Speaker 1: just like, oh, you know what all I want I
Speaker 1: want I want people to respect that. I want to
Speaker 1: work hard and do good ship. That's all. That's all
Speaker 1: I want at it. That's what I want out of feminism.
Speaker 1: I want men and women to not go all your
Speaker 1: dreams are so cute, like fuck you, it's just that
Speaker 1: those little fucking moments and like that add up that
Speaker 1: makes you a little show you you're gonna do some
Speaker 1: get fucking shut up and then even cares if they
Speaker 1: say that. I don't even want them to respect me.
Speaker 1: I just want them to leave me alone. I would
Speaker 1: take either, but it's like it's so like just the
Speaker 1: sick of hearing, Like I'm just at a point where
Speaker 1: it's like I just want to do what I want
Speaker 1: to do and be trusted that anything I am pursuing
Speaker 1: I'm doing at an incredibly high level of excellence and quality.
Speaker 1: And that is what I'm shooting for. Anything I create,
Speaker 1: I create from two points of view. How does this
Speaker 1: serve me? And how does this serve the people? If
Speaker 1: I can't figure out how those two things align, it
Speaker 1: doesn't go further than a piece of paper. Um, And
Speaker 1: that's that. I mean, That's where I'm at, and like
Speaker 1: I would love to meet somebody that gets that and
Speaker 1: is inspired by that, and not until the ones that happens,
Speaker 1: it's like, yes, we're gonna We're gonna make something so good.
Speaker 1: So when you would ask before, like is it the
Speaker 1: universe is at me? I mean I do feel like
Speaker 1: there's a certain level of like the universe is saying
Speaker 1: you don't have time right now, like lay your foundation,
Speaker 1: build your house around you, you know, because for all
Speaker 1: times the purposes. I feel like I've been existing in
Speaker 1: a shock like a really well decorated ship for a
Speaker 1: while in terms of like what my existence as a
Speaker 1: creative is like, It's always felt very flimsy, Whereas right
Speaker 1: now I feel like I'm building the castle, you know, like,
Speaker 1: this is what I want to live in for the
Speaker 1: rest of my days, and even if at some point
Speaker 1: I decided to remodel. Like what you're seeing is someone
Speaker 1: who's really realized, like this is where I'm at. This
Speaker 1: comedy space is where like I find like I feel
Speaker 1: like I came home, you know, Like it was like
Speaker 1: for a lot of my life, I thought I was
Speaker 1: just this missingthrope who was misunderstood, didn't like people, and
Speaker 1: was overly and lytical. And then eventually I was like, Oh,
Speaker 1: you're a comic. That's what you are. Like once I
Speaker 1: was doing stand up and like was in this mix,
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, that's what you are. All these
Speaker 1: things that seemed like negative aspects actually are imperative to
Speaker 1: your success in this field, you know, and and in
Speaker 1: defining all the things you do in this field. So
Speaker 1: it's like I'm coming on the show at a time
Speaker 1: in my life it's a very burgeoning time for my work.
Speaker 1: You can be proud of. Yeah, you know, that was
Speaker 1: a beautiful That was a beautiful three sixty. You really
Speaker 1: brought it. You all brought it all around. There was
Speaker 1: there was excellence and quality in that work. Thank you Jesus.
Speaker 1: Where can we find you after we're done listening to
Speaker 1: this episode? Um, well, there's all of course, there's the socials,
Speaker 1: so there's Amanda Seals, Amanda s c a l e.
Speaker 1: S On all of the social media's. Apparently I'm really
Speaker 1: good at Instagram stories. Oh I love watching people. So
Speaker 1: people have been like telling me in the street like
Speaker 1: I love Yeah, I'm going to watch them because I
Speaker 1: love a comics. There's a bunch of comics in my
Speaker 1: head that a great Instagram stories. I love it, So
Speaker 1: that can be a source of joy for you. Also,
Speaker 1: my second season of my web series Get Your Life
Speaker 1: in the first as well, you can watch on blavity
Speaker 1: dot com b L a v I t y dot com.
Speaker 1: It's a site for black millennials, but you can go
Speaker 1: to it even if you're not a black man. They
Speaker 1: don't shoot the camera at your face. So I host
Speaker 1: the show called Greatest Ever on True TV. And then
Speaker 1: you can also see me on Insecure season two coming
Speaker 1: in the summer, so that we got moved up. And
Speaker 1: if you're in l A you can catch me every
Speaker 1: First Tuesday at nerd Melt with smart, funny and black preface.
Speaker 1: You have a big l a listening listenership. Yes so,
Speaker 1: and if you follow me like I mean, i'd post
Speaker 1: my shows, but come out to some see some stand
Speaker 1: up and you know, there's a lot of stuff going
Speaker 1: on that needs the support of smart especially women, uh,
Speaker 1: to keep going and to keep thriving. So come spend
Speaker 1: your money on that stuff. I love it. Oh good, good,
Speaker 1: Thank you very much for spending this Sunday with us, Amanda.
Speaker 1: We've been talking about this, so I'm glad we were
Speaker 1: no I know, I was like when you when you
Speaker 1: were in from like, we were like, this is the
Speaker 1: one day for a while. So thank you so much.
Speaker 1: This has been guys. We've talked to the Anti Slot
Speaker 1: Chimney podcast. We'll talk you next. You said, I give
Speaker 1: you the sun. I'll give you the sun. Maybe that's
Speaker 1: the god. I can give me your I'll give you
Speaker 1: my heart. I'll give you my heart. Maybe that's why
Speaker 1: we get so this is too much. I know you
Speaker 1: said you had had enough, but I've been going bad
Speaker 1: back to win and not know. You stay saying she's house,
Speaker 1: He's so funna keep coming until you tell me to go.
Speaker 1: Then I'll leave you alone. Telling me to go, then
Speaker 1: I'll leave you alone. M if you want me to go,
Speaker 1: you if you want me to good. Yeah. Thanks to
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