Speaker 1: Welcome to Guys We Fucked. Guys We Guys Book. I'm Christina,
Speaker 1: I'm Karn. We're sorry about last night, the anti slut
Speaker 1: shaming podcast. I never stopped. Oh, how you doing? Fucker's
Speaker 1: Welcome to another episode of Guys We Fuck. It's the
Speaker 1: anti slut shaming podcast. I'm Karin, I'm Christina. How you doing, girl?
Speaker 1: I'm doing great? Uh and I'm hungry. Well I'm not
Speaker 1: not as much as usual. But it's a very special
Speaker 1: day for us here at Guys We Fucked, mostly because
Speaker 1: this is a sponsor that I've been waiting for personally
Speaker 1: whole life for a very very long time. Not my
Speaker 1: whole life because it didn't exist, but God help me
Speaker 1: if it did my life, my life would be in
Speaker 1: shambles by now if it did. Um. But this episode
Speaker 1: is sponsored by Postmates. Now, you guys know, I fucking
Speaker 1: love most Mates because long before having them as a
Speaker 1: sponsor was even a twinkling my sky exactly. But even
Speaker 1: before that, it's a service that I used probably too much,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say so much so that I've tweeted about
Speaker 1: them and they've been like, hey, do you want to
Speaker 1: like you know us to send your stuff for free. Um,
Speaker 1: And I was like, yes, a dent, do you want
Speaker 1: you to send me stuff for free? My life was
Speaker 1: going well since I discovered Taco Bell, but sometimes I
Speaker 1: can't get to a Taco Bell and this I know
Speaker 1: this sounds like ad read, but it's not. But once
Speaker 1: I got Postmates to be able to bring Taco Bell
Speaker 1: to me, everything came together. Honestly, post Shaped M's changed
Speaker 1: my life as well for that very reason. Not Taco Bell,
Speaker 1: but like other places. Yeah, because it's like, you know what,
Speaker 1: there are other places that will bring you food if
Speaker 1: they have a delivery service in the house, But what
Speaker 1: are you gonna do if you there's a place that
Speaker 1: you love. And I mean most times in my case,
Speaker 1: it's like either in a rush and I need to
Speaker 1: get out their stuff done at home, or I'm just
Speaker 1: hungover and I need things brought to me and I
Speaker 1: am willing to pay a small fee for those things
Speaker 1: to be brought to me. I mean, basically, the direction
Speaker 1: we're heading in is no one ever leaving the house,
Speaker 1: and I'm on board and that with that. It's not
Speaker 1: so much I don't want to leave the house. It's
Speaker 1: more that I don't want to have to communicate with others,
Speaker 1: right right right right right, So any way that we
Speaker 1: can cut that out of the equation plus is great.
Speaker 1: I really love Postmates because they get me, Like they
Speaker 1: literally go out and get things for me. It's beautiful.
Speaker 1: Thank you about it. Um, guys Postmates, if you don't
Speaker 1: know what it is, it's just it's just your your fans.
Speaker 1: Just let your fantasies go wild. Like they can bring
Speaker 1: you food if you like realize that you have to
Speaker 1: run to a birthday party and you didn't get a gift,
Speaker 1: Like they can go to regular Stories. They can best
Speaker 1: buy for you. Use the Postmates for a year. I
Speaker 1: didn't know that. Oh yeah not using Yeah, it's great.
Speaker 1: Staples they can go Yeah, Staples is definitely on there. Um,
Speaker 1: if you are really this is actually another time I've
Speaker 1: used it, and it's very If you're really sick and
Speaker 1: you need medicine, I've had them bring me like you
Speaker 1: can go through they have the whole chart like list
Speaker 1: of things that they have CVS or for Dwayne read
Speaker 1: and you can have them bring you shut the funk
Speaker 1: up medicines. That's good for your grandma or for you
Speaker 1: if you just sick and you can't move. Yeah, obviously,
Speaker 1: like they can't pick up a prescription for you, but
Speaker 1: anything that you can get over the counter they can
Speaker 1: bring to you. They can bring you the you know,
Speaker 1: like a gatorade, a box of tissues, and some usin
Speaker 1: X and I had them to do that, and it's
Speaker 1: really really great because especially when you live in New York,
Speaker 1: you don't have a car that you're getting into. So
Speaker 1: if you have to walk like fifteen minutes in the
Speaker 1: cold and you're already sick and it's like snowing, that's
Speaker 1: not a good situation. Probably better for you to pay
Speaker 1: someone a little bit to do it. Yes, I know
Speaker 1: it's a luxury. So if you're poor, don't use Postman. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's not a good right to handle your money. But honestly,
Speaker 1: for a little bit of look like you feel like
Speaker 1: a fucking princess, if feels like you have that black
Speaker 1: the annex black card, I don't even think they may
Speaker 1: get more. I don't think they make it anymore. Get
Speaker 1: one of those, um but anyway, anything anywhere, any time,
Speaker 1: whatever it is, Postmates gets it. And if you need
Speaker 1: another reason to use Postmates, guys, right now, you can
Speaker 1: get thirty days of free delivery on any order over
Speaker 1: twenty dollars. And it's like you're gonna do that anyway
Speaker 1: when you sign up for Postmates Unlimited. So go ahead,
Speaker 1: download the Postmates app on iOS or Android and get
Speaker 1: anything anywhere anytime Postmates they get it. I've never backed
Speaker 1: something more enthusiastically. And while we're on this high, come
Speaker 1: ce us live, guys, the Bridge of Bishop tour is
Speaker 1: in effect. Uh tonight and tomorrow we are going to
Speaker 1: be at Helium Comedy Club in Buffalo, New York. And
Speaker 1: you know what, I know you don't got their plans
Speaker 1: because you're in Buffalo, New York. Yes, come out, and
Speaker 1: I don't want to funk. I don't. I don't want
Speaker 1: to give a funk. You to your te own, but
Speaker 1: also please come to see the show. We're excited to
Speaker 1: be there. But remember we cannot come back to these
Speaker 1: towns if you do not come in by ticket. So true.
Speaker 1: And then next weekend February eight or the tenth, Kran
Speaker 1: and I are gonna be in San Diego, California at
Speaker 1: the American Comedy Club. Very exciting for tickets to these shows,
Speaker 1: go to Sorry about Last Night Comedy dot Com slash Tours,
Speaker 1: and you can get all the other dates for all
Speaker 1: the other cities we're gonna be at because the Bridget
Speaker 1: Bishop Tour is just starting. And in February fourteen, uh
Speaker 1: is the day that you're gonna probably be scrounging at
Speaker 1: a CVS to try and see if they've got any
Speaker 1: good holiday cards left for you. Boo. It's also the
Speaker 1: day that the comedy album Joseph Bessie and I, who
Speaker 1: has been a guest on this podcast, comes out on iTunes.
Speaker 1: It's called Maybe It's You. It's original sketches and songs. Um.
Speaker 1: A fun fact about this album is that Joseph Bessie
Speaker 1: writes for Adam Sandler his movies. He's written for a
Speaker 1: couple Adam Sailor movies in a row. And uh, hopefully
Speaker 1: I don't think the piss if I say this, but um,
Speaker 1: one of the tracks he actually played aid for Sandler
Speaker 1: and he gave us. This is early on in the process,
Speaker 1: and he had like one like very small note that
Speaker 1: he gave us, and the fucking note changed the track.
Speaker 1: It was, so I'm like, God, not Adam Soundler for
Speaker 1: no reason, I know, right, So uh, and then I believe.
Speaker 1: Check out my social media it's Christina hutch on everything.
Speaker 1: Because we're gonna be doing a show in Los Angeles
Speaker 1: the weekend, the week of Valentine's Day, so have fun
Speaker 1: and come see us. Absolutely. And then if you're in
Speaker 1: New York, Friday, February third, Nacho Bitches is happening at
Speaker 1: New York Comedy Club. It's my monthly show that I
Speaker 1: started with Blair Sake, but she might not be there,
Speaker 1: who knows if not. We have a series of amazing
Speaker 1: guest hosts, including rosebud Baker and Justin Perez, who you've
Speaker 1: both heard on Guys We Fucked uh. And you can
Speaker 1: follow me on social media. It's philanthropy gal uh. If
Speaker 1: you don't know that, then you don't need to follow me.
Speaker 1: The show is eleven fifteen pm. Tickets are twelve dollars
Speaker 1: with code Nacho. As always, it's a really really fun
Speaker 1: night And if you want to follow both Christina and
Speaker 1: I on social media, it's sorry about last night across
Speaker 1: the board and it's sorry about last Night Comedy dot com. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And then the next day, Saturday February is Glama Pus
Speaker 1: hosted by Wendy Starling and myself at zinc Barn thirty
Speaker 1: pm is when the show starts, it sells out. To
Speaker 1: get your tickets now, you can find them in the
Speaker 1: description for this very podcast, as well as the music.
Speaker 1: Any song you're on Guys he Fucked. If you just
Speaker 1: look at the description of that episode the very bottom,
Speaker 1: you'll see links. That's where you get it, because I've
Speaker 1: had a lot of people asking us about what's that
Speaker 1: song with that. Look in the bottom of the description.
Speaker 1: And also there's a whole Spotify trump playlist dedicated to it.
Speaker 1: Stephen Maboo his user name I think is the Penta
Speaker 1: on Spotify and okay and then good enough and uh
Speaker 1: and he has Guys we Fucked, the anti slut shaming
Speaker 1: playlist that has all of the songs that we've played.
Speaker 1: And if you have a band, um and you have
Speaker 1: streaming links, you could send them g g WF Podcast
Speaker 1: Music at gmail dot com. Because I don't know if
Speaker 1: you know this, all of the music you hear, especially
Speaker 1: for the past year, has all been submitted by guys
Speaker 1: with listeners. You guys are so fucking talented. Thank you
Speaker 1: for letting us use your musical abilities to make our
Speaker 1: show shine brighter. Absolutely, and thank you very much to
Speaker 1: our second sponsor of this episode, movement watches. You've heard
Speaker 1: us talk about them before. We all own movement watches
Speaker 1: were part of the dare I say movement? Yes, we
Speaker 1: are part of the movement. I really like this, not
Speaker 1: because I need a watch to tell time, because like
Speaker 1: that's what my cell phones for. Uh, But I do
Speaker 1: like a watch because it does add to making you
Speaker 1: think that you're better than other people, which is true
Speaker 1: a lot of fun. I know people could like like
Speaker 1: to walk around me like we're all equal, and I
Speaker 1: like to feel like equals. No, no, no, I wish
Speaker 1: the notion of people being treated equally thumbs up, But
Speaker 1: like actually thinking in your head that you're equal to
Speaker 1: everyone is preposterous And I wouldn't believe it if you
Speaker 1: said it to my fucking face anyway, I wouldn't. I wouldn't.
Speaker 1: No one wants no one. Most people hey like or
Speaker 1: are disgusted by others. That is why things like Postmates
Speaker 1: are so fucking successful all day and so that that's
Speaker 1: my feelings on that. So it's like, wait, where what
Speaker 1: I want everyone to have equal rights and be treated well,
Speaker 1: But do I want to be on the same level
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Speaker 1: Love tits. I like that you spelled third but not love.
Speaker 1: You better know how to spell love. If there's someone
Speaker 1: one thing I could spell it's love? Is it for me?
Speaker 1: It's cunked. That's a great word. It's easy. It's an
Speaker 1: easy one. Uh. Personal stuff, well, we don't have any
Speaker 1: because we don't have a time machine, and we're recording
Speaker 1: this a little bit more in advance because right now
Speaker 1: we're fucking on the bridget Bishop tour. A loud mouth.
Speaker 1: Oh who got killed for it? Right? I mean I
Speaker 1: think she just was like someone who thought differently than
Speaker 1: any other people of her time and got killed for it.
Speaker 1: To women's rights, yeah, that's pretty much how it goes,
Speaker 1: and probably going to real well, and if anything crazy
Speaker 1: has happened in recent news, as particularly pertains to sexuality
Speaker 1: or women, we can't comment on it because we don't
Speaker 1: know about it yet. There you go, so don't get
Speaker 1: too mad. We'll probably tweet about it. Yeah, absolutely, don't
Speaker 1: you worry. All make flogs from the road. I'm just
Speaker 1: really going backwards in my email and looking at all
Speaker 1: the things that I have not responded to. So many
Speaker 1: things Nan I needness as boy, oh boy, I needed
Speaker 1: assistant to be like, hey, brush your teeth, bitch. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's something I never forgot. I love brushing
Speaker 1: my teeth. I do it like three times a day,
Speaker 1: sometimes more. I love brushing my teeth. Um, okay, so
Speaker 1: we're gonna go right to the mail bag since we
Speaker 1: don't have a time machine. And if you do want
Speaker 1: to email us, it's sorry about last night show at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com. Absolutely. Uh this uh subject line is
Speaker 1: I hate it when my boyfriend touches me. Please help,
Speaker 1: you know. And I always like sort of think in
Speaker 1: my head, what is this email going to be? Always?
Speaker 1: And it's different than I thought I was going to be,
Speaker 1: but not that it's not that different. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm spoiling it, Karin. Sorry, I was really just buying
Speaker 1: time because I had to burp up this Lacroix. That's
Speaker 1: what problem. No, it's Lacroix. Definitely not it's definitely like
Speaker 1: they make fun of people know it's Lacroix. You know.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I thought you knew that. I never knew that.
Speaker 1: I thought you just said it loud and proud. I
Speaker 1: thought you just said look because it's more funny when
Speaker 1: people say tarja like it's silly. No, I really thought
Speaker 1: it was like qua fuck, Now everything's different. Um, I'm
Speaker 1: on that bit you doesn't want to boy friend to
Speaker 1: touch or what's she going on? I recently found your
Speaker 1: podcast a few months ago and fell in love with it.
Speaker 1: You ladies are helping the world become a veteran safer
Speaker 1: place for women. I hope and I strive to be
Speaker 1: as outspoken and badass as both of you. Definitely speak up,
Speaker 1: just not to me on Twitter. So I have a problem,
Speaker 1: and I'm not sure what to make of it. My
Speaker 1: boyfriend and I have been together for three years and
Speaker 1: have two children together. I love him very much and
Speaker 1: want to be with him forever. So cliche, but it's true.
Speaker 1: But I've been having an issue lately with how much
Speaker 1: he touches me to anyone else. This may seem stupid,
Speaker 1: as most people love being touched and caressed by the
Speaker 1: person they love. Your feelings aren't stupid. First of all,
Speaker 1: I want to step in this. However, the extent of
Speaker 1: it is ridiculous. He is constantly smacking my ask, groping
Speaker 1: my ass and boobs, and always is pressing up against
Speaker 1: me and sticking his hands down my pants and up
Speaker 1: my shirt. I get that he loves my body, but
Speaker 1: it makes me feel so objectified and angry. What's worse
Speaker 1: is he does it in front of my two year old,
Speaker 1: and I don't think she should see that. I've playfully
Speaker 1: told him, and there's your problem. He does it a lot,
Speaker 1: but I'm unsure of how to tell him how I feel.
Speaker 1: I don't want him to stop touching me, of course,
Speaker 1: but the constant groping is getting old. I just want
Speaker 1: your perspective of this situation and what you would do. Emily.
Speaker 1: You can say my name, okay, Emily girl, I'd be
Speaker 1: pissed too. Yeah. I mean, the occasional as slop or
Speaker 1: something is totally fine, but sticking his hands down your pants,
Speaker 1: especially like that's not even hygienic, Like you don't I
Speaker 1: don't know where the fun his fingers. Yeah, you're gonna
Speaker 1: get your dirtiest hands vagina, your vagina. That's not I mean,
Speaker 1: that's just so to me, and it's so it's so
Speaker 1: interesting to me anytime someone's like, I want to be
Speaker 1: with this person forever, But I don't know how to
Speaker 1: tell them this very simple thing that bothers me great, Like,
Speaker 1: w TF, So I'm gonna tell these two strange shookers
Speaker 1: who have a pocket that I like, wait that I
Speaker 1: like listening to. I mean just like kind of just
Speaker 1: think about that that scenario in your head, which is
Speaker 1: not a scenarre for you. It's a real life fucking
Speaker 1: thing that's happening. Uh, does your okay? So I have
Speaker 1: actually have a bit about being sexually annoyed, like every
Speaker 1: woman has been sexually annoyed, and and I do like
Speaker 1: an actor where I'm like humping the air, but I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: my boyfriends are always coming up behind me, like Christina,
Speaker 1: what are you doing coming the air? Making a sandwich
Speaker 1: on your phone? And sometimes like my dresser with all
Speaker 1: my clothes and it is upstairs and my apartment's two levels.
Speaker 1: Sorry not to brag, but uh but uh. And sometimes
Speaker 1: I'll be changing in the living room, not the bedroom,
Speaker 1: and I'm just going through my day and then he'll
Speaker 1: see me like, and I fucking get so annoyed. Doesn't
Speaker 1: do it anymore because I like, I'm being sexualized when
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm just trying to get from one shirt
Speaker 1: to the next. My friend, can you not write, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's how I say it exactly. I've certainly have had
Speaker 1: people who are like that, never really a boyfriend, only
Speaker 1: because I categorize that behavior under juvenile and I if
Speaker 1: there's one kind of behavior that I fucking hate in
Speaker 1: anyone romantic partner, otherwise it's juvenile behavior, I hate it.
Speaker 1: I hate it. It bothers me so much. I don't
Speaker 1: like it. I've been in an adult since I was
Speaker 1: even slap in your button, that's not Stevens slapping, but
Speaker 1: it's not juvenile behind the behind, like with an erection
Speaker 1: coming up behind me, that kind of stuff, or like
Speaker 1: getting or like getting or just like getting horny from
Speaker 1: like me changing, Like I even if I'm changing and
Speaker 1: it's non sexual changing, I actually try to do it
Speaker 1: in private. Sometimes I'll go into my little closet office
Speaker 1: and close the door when I don't want him to comment,
Speaker 1: because those are like everyday things and like I don't
Speaker 1: want to have to worry about like looking sexy or like,
Speaker 1: you know, sometimes I check my vagina for toilet paper
Speaker 1: before I put on pants. You know, I do a
Speaker 1: lot of maintenance, and I just want to be able
Speaker 1: to exist in a non sexualized world. Yes, so I
Speaker 1: just do that in private. Changing to me as a
Speaker 1: private thing. I even like growing up, my mother used
Speaker 1: to just like full on change in front of my
Speaker 1: dad dad, and it would it seemed very like it
Speaker 1: was like so casual and I was, and so I
Speaker 1: don't know. I just like, no, it wasn't what I
Speaker 1: just didn't want to do. I just don't like changing
Speaker 1: as a casual I don't like my body being revealed
Speaker 1: in a casual manner, which is why even the nudity
Speaker 1: on girls like Dunham that I didn't like it, it
Speaker 1: didn't bother me because like she was not whatever Hollywood standard.
Speaker 1: I was just like I don't need to see why
Speaker 1: I liked it, because you never see non sexualized female
Speaker 1: nudity and I'm like, she's just trying to get from
Speaker 1: one shirt to the next two, like all the bitches
Speaker 1: all over the world. But it's like we don't that's
Speaker 1: like giving too much credit to the viewer to me,
Speaker 1: because it's like, of course we're gonna still make it
Speaker 1: out about her body, and like I just don't. I
Speaker 1: just I think there's just too much nudity for no
Speaker 1: reason all the time, Like I fucking love nudity, but
Speaker 1: I wanted to be like artistic and like cool, like
Speaker 1: not even sexy, like just like like truly artistic, like
Speaker 1: like a nice, beautiful, like nude portrait. I love that,
Speaker 1: paying that in my want to hang that horridor. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but for the person who wrote the woman who wrote
Speaker 1: this email, uh, you need to have a talk with
Speaker 1: your boyfriend without your kids there and say how you feel.
Speaker 1: And that is that it is inappropriate to do in
Speaker 1: front of your child, which I completely agree. But I
Speaker 1: think the hand down the pants thing like hugging and
Speaker 1: kissing and being affectional, Yeah, that's fine. The kid probably
Speaker 1: should see that to just knock that off with them
Speaker 1: when they're a teenager. No, but it's like also, but
Speaker 1: it's like I would would be careful not to just
Speaker 1: make it like it's only about your kids, because that's
Speaker 1: kind of like saying it's about you too, like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm not interested, um in you hitting on me because
Speaker 1: I have a boyfriend. Like there, there shouldn't be nice,
Speaker 1: so I don't like you. Yeah, there shouldn't be I
Speaker 1: have to be a qualifier there. It's like you don't
Speaker 1: like this behavior because you don't like this behavior and
Speaker 1: on top of you not liking this behavior, you also
Speaker 1: this behavior is unhealthy for your child to witness. So
Speaker 1: this is like, this is a double decker issue that
Speaker 1: we're going with here. Um And to me, his behavior,
Speaker 1: if you obviously aren't into it, it's a telling me
Speaker 1: he's not as in tune with your emotions as you
Speaker 1: should be as your partner. And number two, it's telling
Speaker 1: me that he he seems to have a little bit
Speaker 1: of ownership over your boy got to say, objectifying you.
Speaker 1: He feels like hens you your body for sure and
Speaker 1: has access to seven And as we've talked about many
Speaker 1: times on this podcast, just because you are in a relationship,
Speaker 1: even if you're married to someone, even if you someone
Speaker 1: came out of your fucking vagina, that does not mean
Speaker 1: that you have ownership over their body in any way,
Speaker 1: shape or form ever. I mean, it looks like a
Speaker 1: little baby that you need. But even then you have
Speaker 1: to can't molest it. So you can't just reminder every
Speaker 1: episode we're like, hey, don't molest people. People seem to
Speaker 1: really not know. No, they really don't, because again emails
Speaker 1: four days about being Melisson so many Yeah, but have
Speaker 1: that conversation. But I agree that's a good point. Make
Speaker 1: sure that you are also communicating that it's not okay
Speaker 1: to you and why that is because he needs to
Speaker 1: understand where you're coming from. Yeah, and I know, and
Speaker 1: I can I can see the email. There was this
Speaker 1: kind of concern that you have about then him kind
Speaker 1: of going the opposite direction and not touching you at all.
Speaker 1: But it's like, if he's a fucking adult and you
Speaker 1: talk to him in a respectful manner, he should understand
Speaker 1: that that's not what you mean. And if he just
Speaker 1: stops touching you all together, that's juvenile behavior on top
Speaker 1: of it, because he's like, well, you don't want me
Speaker 1: to touch you, so then I'm not going to touch
Speaker 1: you at all. If he's like that, he's a fucking baby.
Speaker 1: And send him to time out and you never have him,
Speaker 1: never come out, and then spank him and see how
Speaker 1: he likes a lot. That's so annoying. We're very trying
Speaker 1: to get back at a guy and didn't same thing
Speaker 1: he's doing to you, and then he likes it. You're like, god,
Speaker 1: damn it. That's the problem with cat calling. You really
Speaker 1: can't reverse cato because people please, they love it. Oh boy, Okay,
Speaker 1: this email subject line help. Do I really need to
Speaker 1: hug my father in law? No, but let's see what
Speaker 1: you have to say. Hello, my two favorite people, Tom. Thanks.
Speaker 1: I have a dilemma. My husband's aunt lost her battle
Speaker 1: with cancer and her services on Saturday. That being said,
Speaker 1: I know my father in law will be there and
Speaker 1: my husband and I don't get along by any means.
Speaker 1: He is very abusive to my husband, his siblings, and wife.
Speaker 1: He would randomly show up or at our old house
Speaker 1: and just walk in without knocking. We left the middle
Speaker 1: of Christmas last several years ago because he was being
Speaker 1: belligerent and aggressive. Um. I could go on and on.
Speaker 1: He has said nothing but degrading and sexist things too,
Speaker 1: and about me. I am very protective over of my
Speaker 1: body since I was raped by my boyfriend at the
Speaker 1: time and his friends, uh and his friends while I
Speaker 1: was in high school. Again, this whole rape thing is
Speaker 1: being used as an aside. Never shut the funk up
Speaker 1: about that and don't want to be in the same
Speaker 1: room as him, let alone let him touch me? Is
Speaker 1: zari pol He didn't he didn't assault her, correct, Okay, Um,
Speaker 1: he just says sexually degrading things and she was right, right, Okay,
Speaker 1: is there a polite way to go about this? Thank
Speaker 1: you kindly? Polite, polite, polite, polite, polite, polite. I don't
Speaker 1: think you gotta worry about being polite. I think you
Speaker 1: could be respectful and you don't have to be polite,
Speaker 1: and you don't have to hug your fucking father in law.
Speaker 1: God damn. But I would say, I don't know if
Speaker 1: this person drinks alcohol, if he goes off the rails
Speaker 1: and becomes like very violent without alcohol in him, or
Speaker 1: if it's only because there is a safety concern. But
Speaker 1: I think when you get to the funeral, I don't know.
Speaker 1: Maybe I would run this by your boyfriend because he
Speaker 1: probably knows his father well. But I'm sure you know
Speaker 1: him well at this point too. But I would not.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't even go in. I would just when I
Speaker 1: don't want to hug somebody, which is very rare. Uh.
Speaker 1: You're given hugs out to people who don't want them.
Speaker 1: People don't want to hug you sometime, and I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: you will, but I know I right, ship well, and
Speaker 1: that's the end of my hugging. I'm sorry, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't hugging no. But if someone doesn't want to
Speaker 1: be hugged, you don't hug him because then it takes
Speaker 1: the point of the way the hug. Why are you
Speaker 1: even hugging in there anyway? Anyway? Uh uh. But when
Speaker 1: I don't want to hug somebody, UM, I don't even
Speaker 1: go near them, and I say hi, and I say hey,
Speaker 1: good to see you, and I make it note and
Speaker 1: I I am very good at not hugging people when
Speaker 1: I don't want to. Because I don't think you have
Speaker 1: to come out and say I don't want to hug you,
Speaker 1: because you say horrible for you know all the reasons
Speaker 1: which are totally legit and make a lot of sense,
Speaker 1: which is of course why you don't want to do that. Um.
Speaker 1: I don't think he deserves that explanation, nor is it
Speaker 1: necessary at all. Uh. I think you should just set
Speaker 1: the standard by not hugging him, by acknowledging him, maybe
Speaker 1: say hi, whatever the fun you want to say from
Speaker 1: a distance, when he's not h so close to you
Speaker 1: that he can go in for the hug. Way, Well,
Speaker 1: it's interesting to have your boyfriend maybe play defense. For Yeah,
Speaker 1: if this guy's like hugging, if he's such an asshole,
Speaker 1: or that you even have a history of hugging if
Speaker 1: you obviously like don't get along. Well, it's like a
Speaker 1: control thing, it is. Yeah, yeah, it is a control thing,
Speaker 1: I think, and so on his end for sure, And uh,
Speaker 1: don't give him that power because he doesn't deserve it,
Speaker 1: he hasn't earned it, and h he's a disrespectful asshole. Yes,
Speaker 1: I agree, and I'm all for making a stance. The
Speaker 1: only thing that that throw that there's a little variable
Speaker 1: of this is that it's a funeral funeral, and you've
Speaker 1: got to be really careful not to make the funeral
Speaker 1: about you and not to make a scene at a funeral.
Speaker 1: There was like a very few That's why I'm like,
Speaker 1: no explanations, very few places like that. I'm against making
Speaker 1: a stance. This is also because I grew up. You know,
Speaker 1: I grew up. I have had a Jewish grandmother. She's
Speaker 1: since passed away. Uh, I really loved her, but she
Speaker 1: did she made a huge scene at my grandfather's funeral
Speaker 1: because someone that I guess they had like either my
Speaker 1: grandfather her had gotten into an al like a verbal
Speaker 1: altercation with and they didn't get along. But you know whatever,
Speaker 1: my grandfather died and he came, this man who they
Speaker 1: didn't like, came to the funeral to pay his final spects,
Speaker 1: and he came with good intentions. I was like, you know,
Speaker 1: a kid at the time, but I you know, perceptive kid.
Speaker 1: So I could tell that. And she made a big
Speaker 1: fucking scene about it. So and then it just like
Speaker 1: made the whole funeral about her when it was really
Speaker 1: about my grandfather. And also just in general, it's like
Speaker 1: it's a really sad time. There's gonna be people, you know,
Speaker 1: even if um maybe you you know, there's obviously a funeral.
Speaker 1: There's people who are like different levels of sadness depending
Speaker 1: on how close they were to the person so and
Speaker 1: how they agree. Yeah, and some people don't get this funeral.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be like really fucking sad, and it's gonna
Speaker 1: be really, really terrible, the worst say of their lives.
Speaker 1: And there's some people who are gonna be there because
Speaker 1: they're paying respects and that was a person in their life,
Speaker 1: but like their world isn't gonna be torn apart five
Speaker 1: by it. So that's the only thing, Like, yeah, you
Speaker 1: don't have to hug him and you don't have to
Speaker 1: ever touch anyone, especially because you have trauma, and I
Speaker 1: would never want that to be triggered by anything that
Speaker 1: you do. But also kind of just like just stay
Speaker 1: away from him and kind of like just you know,
Speaker 1: or always like you know, you can always like have
Speaker 1: your arm latched through your your husband's arm when you're
Speaker 1: like near him, kind of like moves like that. Just
Speaker 1: be like a little stealth during it, and and and
Speaker 1: but be respectful, not something day to make a stance totally.
Speaker 1: I do think though, after the funeral, if you're if
Speaker 1: your life works out in such a way that you
Speaker 1: see him often more than once a year or twice
Speaker 1: a year, I do think it's worth telling him. I
Speaker 1: would just ignore him for the rest of my life.
Speaker 1: Well that's the difference between I'd be like things. I mean,
Speaker 1: maybe he doesn't deserve to know. I mean, he certainly
Speaker 1: doesn't deserve to know about the trauma that you've experienced
Speaker 1: because oh yeah, no, no no, don't tell him that that's
Speaker 1: not information that he's uh, he deserves to have. But um,
Speaker 1: if you find that you were see him a lot,
Speaker 1: I do think it's worth, you know, post funeral, bringing
Speaker 1: up or maybe maybe your husband can communicate it. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't know, he sounds like an asshole to everybody
Speaker 1: in his life, this father in law person, right, I mean,
Speaker 1: I think above, I think it's beyond like communicating that
Speaker 1: you don't want to hug him. I think it's communicating
Speaker 1: that you don't like the way he treats you and
Speaker 1: the things that he says to you are inappropriate, so
Speaker 1: much so that you do not feel comfortable having any
Speaker 1: physical contact with him. I mean, and also like just
Speaker 1: that he wants to be around he has to be
Speaker 1: a nicer all around human beings. Otherwise you will not
Speaker 1: be making appearances at family events. Yeah, I mean that's
Speaker 1: a decision that you make with your your husband as well.
Speaker 1: It's like, I don't seem really, I mean, it's you know,
Speaker 1: the relationship between kids and their parents is deep, and
Speaker 1: I can't I can never be like you can't. Obviously,
Speaker 1: your your husbands probably want to see his dad, but
Speaker 1: you don't need. But sometimes you don't realize that your
Speaker 1: parents could be a little mostly abusive, and it's hard
Speaker 1: to stand up for yourself. Yeah. Well that yeah, that's
Speaker 1: not her profault. You know. That's why I like, you
Speaker 1: don't gotta marry into Sorry, that's not that's nice. It's
Speaker 1: nice if your spouse or significant other deals with it,
Speaker 1: but they don't have it's not it's true, and that
Speaker 1: because that's the downfall of a lot of relationships. Also, yeah,
Speaker 1: I am very lucky that my not in laws but
Speaker 1: boyfriend's parents are just angels. Yeah, just fucking angel And
Speaker 1: I'm lucky that mine live in Ohio and hey they're honestly, well,
Speaker 1: his mom's nice. Um, that's all we have for I
Speaker 1: hope the world has not blown up or we are
Speaker 1: in uh disarray, But if we are, it's going to
Speaker 1: be fine. Guys. We survived a lot and we can
Speaker 1: survive this week. Yeah, it'll be okay. Yeah, fall us
Speaker 1: on social media rate the podcast was thrown in some
Speaker 1: selfish things and oh, I was, I was. I don't
Speaker 1: know if you had anything else that you need to
Speaker 1: go into, guys. Other than that, we are very excited
Speaker 1: to bring on this week's guest. She's a wonderful comedian,
Speaker 1: she's a writer, she is on the current season of
Speaker 1: laugh Tracks on True TV, and she is from my
Speaker 1: hometown of Union, New Jersey. Please give a warm welcome
Speaker 1: to Joe L. Johnson. Did you get those new shoes.
Speaker 1: What telone going to for the looks? When my god,
Speaker 1: I've been wasting my time on these books like a
Speaker 1: drive at the back of your throw a no k
Speaker 1: exploded what everyone potentially having noticed? Money and all but none?
Speaker 1: You need to dream, you need them more and whatever
Speaker 1: these meant? Your lovely go seecret. What hell is everyone's
Speaker 1: talking about? Not body? You're not selling for a little
Speaker 1: everyone to get everyone get real cool? But's selling the
Speaker 1: shot little but you wild? Everyone but one that day
Speaker 1: I'm she color she picture, but I'm not a genius.
Speaker 1: Justice gets so friendly kind of let's be honest. So
Speaker 1: it's so sort because the ter s. What good is
Speaker 1: everyone talking about? You're not selling with little everyone he's
Speaker 1: doing fine. I can do this. I can put it
Speaker 1: over back. Yeah, you can adjust that. You can sit back,
Speaker 1: you can speak, Yeah, whatever you want to do. You
Speaker 1: can get on the floor if you want. He sat.
Speaker 1: I love setting on the floor. Um. I like your
Speaker 1: shirt that has a uterus on gigantic gold uterus. That's amazing.
Speaker 1: I'm a big fan of the universe. Yes, we see
Speaker 1: there's a lot. You have a lot of great shirts
Speaker 1: about female body parts. Yeah, it's nice. I like to
Speaker 1: make men uncomfortable. As I walked down the street, you
Speaker 1: do do you do you feel their discomfort? Well, it
Speaker 1: depends if I have just the uterus. They're like, are
Speaker 1: you a tourist or or a Texas fan? And I'm
Speaker 1: like what, oh, yeah, Like men do not know what
Speaker 1: this is because it does look like the longhorn. That's
Speaker 1: why I was trying to figure out was like longer herds.
Speaker 1: I didn't know what it was, but men do not
Speaker 1: know what a uterus looks like. So see, that's so
Speaker 1: funny that you like to make men feel uncomfortable because
Speaker 1: I also like that. And I was like, it was
Speaker 1: there something in the water in Union because we're both
Speaker 1: we're both from the same town, but we did not
Speaker 1: know each other, and that in that town. We met
Speaker 1: each other in New York City and then found out
Speaker 1: that your cousin Asia was one of my best friends
Speaker 1: in the entire world. Christine and I have stayed at
Speaker 1: her house summer in l I. Yeah, she's awesome. She's sweetest,
Speaker 1: she has the sweetest person. She is the sweetest. It's
Speaker 1: like that said she was a baby. She was the
Speaker 1: sweetest baby and still the sweetest adults. Like it's one
Speaker 1: of those things like if somebody hurt, so you want
Speaker 1: to right, Yeah, she's so pure, I'm sure. Yeah. So
Speaker 1: you feel like I remember you from high school though,
Speaker 1: from because we were in plays together, right we must
Speaker 1: have been, but we we remember there was a car
Speaker 1: ride when we were going to a gig together, and
Speaker 1: like that's how we really met as comedians. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean maybe it was like a re meeting, but that's
Speaker 1: like my first real thing. And then figuring out that
Speaker 1: Asia was your cousin. Yeah, were you at Greece? No, okay,
Speaker 1: because that was my senior year, was Greece. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: I think I just missed you then because I was like,
Speaker 1: I was like, I know, I didn't. I don't have
Speaker 1: any real recollection once I blacked out during high school,
Speaker 1: which I wasn't drinking yet, so I did not. I
Speaker 1: was late in high school. So growing up in Union.
Speaker 1: What what was your first six aariens with sex? I'm
Speaker 1: very interested to know what it was popping in high
Speaker 1: school at that time. I I am quite prudish, I
Speaker 1: think in general. Yes, I think I got that from
Speaker 1: my mother and I kissed. My first kiss was tenth
Speaker 1: grade mine too. In the woods. I made out in
Speaker 1: the little quad area. Do you remember when we'd like
Speaker 1: go across that area? That was where my first kiss was. Goodness,
Speaker 1: I think he was younger than me. He actually, what
Speaker 1: class were you? What you're to graduate? Two thousand three? Okay,
Speaker 1: so you were a freshman when I was a senior then,
Speaker 1: I think anyway, I think he was maybe like a
Speaker 1: sophomore when I was fresh freshman. That wasn't someone you
Speaker 1: were like dating or how did you know that person?
Speaker 1: It was just a boy I liked, I remember, and
Speaker 1: I and my friends were like, well, you need to
Speaker 1: kiss him, and I was like a mission. They really did.
Speaker 1: We we did the whole thing like they gave me
Speaker 1: like a breath of it. It's a lip claws. It
Speaker 1: was like this whole coaching. And then I kissed him
Speaker 1: and it was actually a pretty good kiss. He was
Speaker 1: good at kissing. Your first kiss was good? Yeah, it was.
Speaker 1: I don't remember his name. Really, did you guys do
Speaker 1: anything else physical? No? I don't even think we dated.
Speaker 1: I don't even know what happened after you just kissed
Speaker 1: him and then you walked away. I kissed a boy.
Speaker 1: Did you have any sex talk with that guy. No,
Speaker 1: no with your mom. Well, so my mother was a
Speaker 1: labor delivery nurse my whole life. So there she would
Speaker 1: bring home like gigantic billboards with STD like information and
Speaker 1: stuff on it, so it'd be like for you specifically, No,
Speaker 1: just stuff like she just had at the hospital that
Speaker 1: she bring home. And I just recall this one giant
Speaker 1: fold out and had all the STDs and pictures of
Speaker 1: them on it. So it's like, this is claim idia,
Speaker 1: this is gonna read and it would be like in
Speaker 1: our groom. But I'm just like something, could you take
Speaker 1: that back to work or something like why is this here?
Speaker 1: So I feel like we had to have talked about sex.
Speaker 1: But that's more like you don't want to get aids basically,
Speaker 1: don't get don't So the first my first boyfriend was
Speaker 1: in the marching band, what instrument? He was drunk, nice brother,
Speaker 1: they were twins. Yeah, you got mixed up, I'll know
Speaker 1: because his brother was a dick. That's good. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: so but we didn't have sex. I didn't have sex
Speaker 1: till the next boyfriend. Why didn't you guys have said,
Speaker 1: why don't have sex with that? Think? I was just scared. Oh,
Speaker 1: my god, I'm gonna get pregnant immediately and then I'm
Speaker 1: gonna get all those diseases. Yeah, your mom's tactic works.
Speaker 1: Actually probably took that poster home to be like and
Speaker 1: then you're like, mom, why is that here? I don't know,
Speaker 1: just look at a folded that you can't not stare
Speaker 1: at a diseased vagata. I don't know. High school wasn't
Speaker 1: like a very like corny time for me, Like I
Speaker 1: didn't I didn't have sex with my any boyfriends I
Speaker 1: had in high school either, Like I was just not dame.
Speaker 1: I was getting fingered f yes, but not having So
Speaker 1: here's what I would do. And my mom's probably not
Speaker 1: go listen to this, but she worked nights, and I
Speaker 1: was the girl who, like my friends would come to
Speaker 1: my house because your mom was because my mom was
Speaker 1: at home, so they'd come and like fucking the basement
Speaker 1: that friend, yes, And then and then they're the guy
Speaker 1: that's like the wig bad would be upstairs with me
Speaker 1: like this bitch won't even let me figure. Yeah, their
Speaker 1: boys getting the full treatment downstairs. Was your basement finished?
Speaker 1: Your unfinished? It was half so it was some rauchy ship.
Speaker 1: There was like a mattress on the floor, so it
Speaker 1: was yeah, it was yeah, my friend and your mom
Speaker 1: never knew. No, she was because I was. I was
Speaker 1: a good kid. I was like good I was at marching,
Speaker 1: bab you were just upstairs being a good friend. I
Speaker 1: was getting finger. I was that. We were like watching
Speaker 1: It was so hilarious, just like the two of us,
Speaker 1: just like watching TV on the couch and occasionally just
Speaker 1: here face. Oh my god, that's a really nice Yeah.
Speaker 1: I was like, I was a great friend for that.
Speaker 1: They're going to do it there or like outdoors. And
Speaker 1: then and then one of those girls ended up getting
Speaker 1: pregnict Oh boy, yeah, oh I love this. You guys
Speaker 1: are breaking it all back. I've never thought about all
Speaker 1: of this. So how old was she when she got pregnant?
Speaker 1: She got pregnant in your basement. I don't think she
Speaker 1: got pregnant in my basement might be the title episode.
Speaker 1: She might have been like eighteen or nineteen, so she
Speaker 1: was still she It was like right senior senior years.
Speaker 1: Her mother used always call her fast. That's what black
Speaker 1: people would call a slut fast. That's a fast little girl.
Speaker 1: She was fast. Her mom was saying that, I mean
Speaker 1: her didn't her mom have any control over her behavior
Speaker 1: or no? I don't know if she was still in
Speaker 1: high school under her roof? Yeah, yeah, and she lived
Speaker 1: in a different town a nice Cranford term honestly than yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that's that's all. That's way nicer and fast little girl,
Speaker 1: that she's a whore. I will say that about a
Speaker 1: twelve year old, like she gonna be fast? Wait? Is that?
Speaker 1: What is that? How they got fast times at Ridgemont High?
Speaker 1: Slutty times at Ridgemont High? Have I been watching that
Speaker 1: movie wrong? I mean there were there were there were
Speaker 1: sluttiness going on at Ridgemont High, but there was also
Speaker 1: like just you know, drugs and other things. I don't
Speaker 1: really recall the movie, honestly, I don't think I ever
Speaker 1: saw that was that sharp? Ben? Yeah, yeah, I never
Speaker 1: saw that movie. Yeah, so you were like you were
Speaker 1: the home for the fast people. I was the hope
Speaker 1: of the faster, the night the nightly h yeah, spot yeah,
Speaker 1: that's so nice. And then so not even a finger.
Speaker 1: I don't remember you blow anybody. I definitely didn't blow anybody.
Speaker 1: Remember the first time you blew? I feel like I
Speaker 1: blew that the boyfriend I had that I'm having sex
Speaker 1: with Okay, and what do you mean him? I met
Speaker 1: him working at Target. That was my first job. That's
Speaker 1: a good first job. What are we allowed to say
Speaker 1: that anything? You want? What your names? Can we get
Speaker 1: sued if we say it's you? It's your description? I
Speaker 1: mean I wouldn't give whole names, but you can give
Speaker 1: first name. I mean, whole names have been given before.
Speaker 1: Usually my role of thumb is if it's a person
Speaker 1: in the entry tainment industry, you can give a full name,
Speaker 1: like if it's a fellow comedian, But if it's if
Speaker 1: it's someone who has chosen a private life, we only
Speaker 1: do first names. That's that's just what I use. Okay, Well,
Speaker 1: I will just describe these people. This boyfriend and after
Speaker 1: we met at Target, and he was a white boy
Speaker 1: as my first white boyfriend. And he was ugly as oh,
Speaker 1: but you like about but he had some good qualities.
Speaker 1: He liked me. Was he nice to you until I
Speaker 1: had to get the restraining orders? Whoa? He was nice
Speaker 1: to until you got the kids? Um, he was ugly
Speaker 1: insided out. He was lugly insided out. His mother was
Speaker 1: a bit too. I got good with mothers. Mothers. I've
Speaker 1: only had. I've only met three of my boyfriends and mothers,
Speaker 1: and they all fucking hated me. Think you very great
Speaker 1: with mom's actually you think, because I've got yeah, But
Speaker 1: I feel like it was more so because all of
Speaker 1: the two, especially of the other boyfriends, were single mothers.
Speaker 1: So it's something about to take it, yeah, when you're
Speaker 1: taking their baby away that they don't want to suck
Speaker 1: their kids with a kind of kind of just yeah,
Speaker 1: I have to just stand there with puppy dog eyes.
Speaker 1: So so the white guy, his mother was a bit
Speaker 1: And what was the first time you met her? What
Speaker 1: was that like? You remember, I don't even remember I
Speaker 1: said anything specific to you that you were like, wait what?
Speaker 1: She probably didn't talk to me like she just treated
Speaker 1: me like I wasn't in the house. It because she didn't,
Speaker 1: like you do you think you had there? It was
Speaker 1: because black and you never know. And that's the thing
Speaker 1: and a mystery exactly because it's like as women, you know,
Speaker 1: the thing when somebody does something sucked up, you're like,
Speaker 1: is it because of a woman? Woman? I have to
Speaker 1: do it because is it because of a woman? Because
Speaker 1: you're just a dick, like I don't know what you want.
Speaker 1: It is, so my mind is always doing that. So
Speaker 1: I mean, did your boyfriend the time have any insight
Speaker 1: that he warned you that she was a bit Nope,
Speaker 1: of course not like what they don't fucking they're dumb.
Speaker 1: And also he probably didn't think she was a bit right. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he loved her, I guess, but yeah, I don't remember.
Speaker 1: I just remember her just being a cold, just evil.
Speaker 1: She was never like nice to me. And so he
Speaker 1: was the first guy I danced for. Oh got her
Speaker 1: for an anniversaries? Super awkward, strippered. Yeah, where were you
Speaker 1: in your dorm and his apart apartment? Yeah? Yeah? Was
Speaker 1: it comfortable? Was it fun? No, that's not fun for me. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Every time I've ever done every time I've ever done it,
Speaker 1: it's been awkward. It's so like Janelle James has a
Speaker 1: joke about how dude recently sag to her and she's like,
Speaker 1: what are you supposed to do with your face? Like
Speaker 1: because you can't laugh? Because if you can't never and
Speaker 1: I'm saying here, like I'm dancing it, I want to laugh,
Speaker 1: Like I'm just super awkward. So I mean, he, I guess,
Speaker 1: like he asked you to dance for him or did
Speaker 1: you just do it because he thought I think he
Speaker 1: asked for it. I don't think I did that of
Speaker 1: my own volition. And you totally naked. I usually danced
Speaker 1: with just you know, brought underwround. I think I just
Speaker 1: stripped out underwear that we just I've never stripped in front.
Speaker 1: I have never danced for anyone. I've done sex. Yeah,
Speaker 1: otfits and that. I mean you just make an entrance
Speaker 1: and then the floors come off. Ye. I don't need
Speaker 1: to be dancing that like grinded on people dancer really is.
Speaker 1: Don't need to dance to that. For the strippers, they're
Speaker 1: professionals and they're really good at it. Whenever my boyfriend
Speaker 1: and I go to a strip club, I always come
Speaker 1: back and he's always says that you moved differently after
Speaker 1: we've seen because I'm like, yeah, because I just watched
Speaker 1: these professional hotties crush it on the dance. I love
Speaker 1: going off a good female strip me male strip club. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't nobody want to see dudes, I know, for real,
Speaker 1: so terrible. So so okay, wait, the restraining were right.
Speaker 1: So we're dating for like a year and a half
Speaker 1: and then I went to college. I went to Boston College,
Speaker 1: and he was still in Jersey. He's a bit of
Speaker 1: a loser, like he didn't really have much going on.
Speaker 1: And I'm starting to like come into my own and
Speaker 1: and I'm in college, and so I started to like,
Speaker 1: you know, distance, We started to have distance. So he
Speaker 1: started kind of just like being emotionally abusive. Just be like,
Speaker 1: you can't you can't break up with me. No one
Speaker 1: else is gonna love you, that type of stuff, no one.
Speaker 1: The first time he said something like that to you,
Speaker 1: did you did it ring as like wait, I'm sorry?
Speaker 1: What like yes? Because so many people they don't even
Speaker 1: they just kind of internalize it and they don't even
Speaker 1: realize that it's wrong when it leaves their mouths. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I I have the type of for some reason, I
Speaker 1: never have been the person to let guys talk to
Speaker 1: me any type of way. Great, and I don't even
Speaker 1: have that much confidence. But I'd be like, you ain't
Speaker 1: talking to me, you ugly, I'm cute, Like what are
Speaker 1: we doing right now? That was ever gonna love me?
Speaker 1: You're lucky? I love you, so like what are we
Speaker 1: talking about? So, so with the verbal abuse started, I
Speaker 1: was just like, all right, he's just being a fucking idiot.
Speaker 1: Then he was he went to one of my uncle's
Speaker 1: houses in Union, what like he stopped by my uncle's house,
Speaker 1: knocked on the door to talk to him. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: because I was breaking up with him, Like how did
Speaker 1: what was specific? Like what is your uncle gonna do?
Speaker 1: So this uncle is my favorite relative. He's one of
Speaker 1: He's one of those people you sit next to it
Speaker 1: like a funeral that will have you crack it up,
Speaker 1: roasted the room. Like he's just one of those guys.
Speaker 1: So he knew him as being my favorite relative and
Speaker 1: he's this uncle over maybe Joel went on exactly. And
Speaker 1: he's also the type of person if we bring a
Speaker 1: stranger to a family gathering, the stranger will sit next
Speaker 1: to them to him because he always makes somebody feel comfortable. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so he went to him to just like complain about it.
Speaker 1: My uncle's like he was in his bathrobe. He like
Speaker 1: the uncle was, Yeah, I was like, what a fucking
Speaker 1: idiot out And he's like a grown man crying to
Speaker 1: to this black man. And my uncle was like, uh
Speaker 1: caught me up, like, um, you might want to get
Speaker 1: this dude. So yeah, it just kind of it only
Speaker 1: fell apart just because we were long distance. Um, and
Speaker 1: then you know, I broke up with him, and he
Speaker 1: was doing the emotional abuse, you know, threatening me and
Speaker 1: all that stuff that he's like, I'm gonna come to
Speaker 1: the school and I'm gonna kill you as the boyfriend.
Speaker 1: The boy that you're with. Now, this boy that he
Speaker 1: was talking about was a football player that I had
Speaker 1: a crush on. I was so mortified at the thought
Speaker 1: of this idiot driving to Boston and knocking on this
Speaker 1: football player's door. I was more mortified by that than
Speaker 1: the thought of him killing me, Like I was embarrassing, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was. I was like, are you kidding me? I
Speaker 1: was like, the smollerker doesn't even know who I am. Like,
Speaker 1: can you imagine somebody knocking on the door I'm killing you.
Speaker 1: I don't even remember. I think I might have just
Speaker 1: mentioned one time in passing and like stuck with him
Speaker 1: because he's a psych exactly because he would come visit
Speaker 1: me at school. So it must have just been like like, oh,
Speaker 1: that's the guy everybody likes. It must have been something
Speaker 1: like and so he was like, I'm gonna kill him,
Speaker 1: and then I'm gonna kill you. I got perfect yachts.
Speaker 1: I got the restrainting water because I didn't want him come.
Speaker 1: I wanted to come to the dude, were gonna kill
Speaker 1: He's gonna get his ass kicked a bunch of football players.
Speaker 1: Never someone's gonna get like a like a weapon or
Speaker 1: something then even because even a football can't stop a bullet.
Speaker 1: Yeah with their hand. Yeah, but I was still just
Speaker 1: way more bar Oh my gosh. It was so funny
Speaker 1: when we go to the court because the school handled
Speaker 1: it really well, Like my school did not around with that.
Speaker 1: That's great to hear they did. They did because on
Speaker 1: colleges questionable, no BC had lived very well. They gave
Speaker 1: me an escort, a male security guard escort who took
Speaker 1: me to the court. I'm like, who they gave you?
Speaker 1: So cool. He drove me to the court and he
Speaker 1: was standing there with me the whole time. And the
Speaker 1: judge was a female. This idiot comes from New Jersey.
Speaker 1: He's dressed, he puts on a suit. He's just he's
Speaker 1: white trash. I'm sorry, guys, I grew up with it.
Speaker 1: It's okay. His suit was like just a shitty, shitty
Speaker 1: bobster suit. So a shitty bobster suit. Yeah, he had
Speaker 1: no tie on, so like it was open and he
Speaker 1: just sounds like our completely. He was from Elizabeth, so
Speaker 1: he just looks like trash try to dress up. And
Speaker 1: he goes into this diet tribe about how I'm the
Speaker 1: crazy one and how about like he needed to be
Speaker 1: he needed to get a straighting order for me, and
Speaker 1: the judges flip it like and so the judges just
Speaker 1: sitting there like bored. He's going on and on and on.
Speaker 1: She's sitting there like this and he's going on, no,
Speaker 1: and then um, he spoke from maybe like eight to
Speaker 1: ten minutes. He did a straight He did a set
Speaker 1: and the judge she and she was like okay. Then
Speaker 1: she looks at me. She's like, do you have anything
Speaker 1: to say? And I was like I opened my mouth
Speaker 1: and I was like you know what, no, I know
Speaker 1: and she goes all right for straighting on a granted
Speaker 1: bad because you knew. You looked at her and you
Speaker 1: both say we were like you're getting it. Gets tell
Speaker 1: he was crazy, Like like what was what was his reaction?
Speaker 1: What was his did he go off? No? I mean
Speaker 1: he I think he cried. He looked like he was
Speaker 1: internally crying. I was like, he cried in the car.
Speaker 1: He definitely cried. And then did he text you after?
Speaker 1: And violent? And he went down? Did he ever contact
Speaker 1: me after that? I don't think. But he ended up
Speaker 1: dating a girl from our high school another Did you
Speaker 1: warn her? No? He just he just loved He only
Speaker 1: dated exclusively black women from Union. It was so weird.
Speaker 1: She was weird in the same class. Oh my goodness,
Speaker 1: what's he doing now? Have you ever looked up on Facebook?
Speaker 1: There's just no way he's doing anything good. That's like
Speaker 1: the fact that like you didn't look him up on
Speaker 1: Facebook speaks volumes like you truly do not care? Did
Speaker 1: that care at all? I was more embarrassed he was
Speaker 1: gonna what were the rules of the restraining order? Like
Speaker 1: he couldn't could have called me, he could have come
Speaker 1: with it, I don't know, whatever the footage fet or whatever.
Speaker 1: He couldn't come to our campus, so he was not
Speaker 1: allowed nice and then he would arrested. He's did right, Okay? Cool?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and so beyond like and you you got
Speaker 1: the restraining order fully through BC because people do write
Speaker 1: us about restraining orders and stuff, and like we were
Speaker 1: always like get a restraining order, but we don't actually
Speaker 1: know how to go through the steps one. No, we
Speaker 1: we went to an actual I think it was Boss,
Speaker 1: the city of Boss. So so your college helped you
Speaker 1: because this was like because if it happened, only with
Speaker 1: it on the campus and they could only with what
Speaker 1: college court. I don't know, but sometimes with right, like
Speaker 1: with a sexual assault cases, sometimes they handle internally and
Speaker 1: they don't take it something exactly. That's some great a
Speaker 1: bullshit that exactly. Okay, So this was like all official,
Speaker 1: and should they just assisted you? And like you just
Speaker 1: you filled up paperworkerwork? Yeah, well good on that. So
Speaker 1: not too hard because I just I kind of want
Speaker 1: to really encourage people, like if you need to, it's
Speaker 1: not hard restraining order or you know, do it that hard? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, well they listened restraining exactly, and your college
Speaker 1: listened and help you. They helped me, and uh, the
Speaker 1: city of Boston was great. That's awesome. Okay, cool. So
Speaker 1: not a really great way to start your dating life though, No,
Speaker 1: I haven't had her sexual career. Was a sex go
Speaker 1: with him? I feel like it wasn't, but maybe that's
Speaker 1: just like it was. It was good. It was good.
Speaker 1: I guess at the time because one of my first
Speaker 1: boyfriend with that I had sex with. I I did
Speaker 1: blow him, but we didn't do anything else other than
Speaker 1: have sex, because we didn't have sex A ton of tons,
Speaker 1: like a bunch, but we didn't do anything like adventurous.
Speaker 1: I feel like your first relationship career and your boyfriend
Speaker 1: after in college. We were with him for five years,
Speaker 1: but you you explored well also because he was like
Speaker 1: eight years older than me, and just I mean I
Speaker 1: just like kind of just hit the jackpot that he
Speaker 1: I found someone who was really in human third bodies,
Speaker 1: really open, good at sex. I mean, I just I'm
Speaker 1: just very lucky with my first boyfriend a brick. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's okay. I mean he uh he really liked wrestling,
Speaker 1: if that makes you feel any better. O w W
Speaker 1: W w W, but like underground wrestling too, Like I
Speaker 1: was at wrestling shows like every weekend. Honestly, those are
Speaker 1: kind of they were fun. It wasn't but it wasn't
Speaker 1: like you know, like it's like a sick like a
Speaker 1: sixy sexting going around and it's convertible or anything. Like
Speaker 1: we were driving around in a van with wrestling merchandise.
Speaker 1: Who'd you date after that guy popped back in a
Speaker 1: little bit. It was the next year. Okay, I bet
Speaker 1: my college boyfriend who was my boyfriend for most of college. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: he was great. We had a great sexually adventurous with him.
Speaker 1: I'm not sexually adventurous. See, it's so interesting. It's it's
Speaker 1: so interesting to me that you just so you just
Speaker 1: don't like sex or first of all, I'm shallow. My
Speaker 1: universe is very close. And I was like, really, I
Speaker 1: don't think that's sweet. Faces changed guys. That was really sweet.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna live on that for a while. Yeah, how
Speaker 1: you that guy? Know? Like you know when they test you,
Speaker 1: like chick was like she figured me and she was
Speaker 1: just like she was like you are you do you
Speaker 1: have paid direct sex? And I was like yeah. She's like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, this show go all the way in. It
Speaker 1: hurts every time you have sex unless it's not a
Speaker 1: huge dick. Damn. Yeah, don't like that. There's a huge
Speaker 1: market for that, but I don't like Yeah, yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't like big dicks. That's perfect actually, because there are
Speaker 1: a lot of guys that will write us and be
Speaker 1: like and my instinct is like honestly, I'm sure there
Speaker 1: are a lot of women who cannot have a big dick.
Speaker 1: And what's the biggest dick that you have encountered that
Speaker 1: didn't hurt seven and a half? Let's see, that's big,
Speaker 1: that's I mean, that's that's the biggest. I think this
Speaker 1: is this might be a racial difference because I was like,
Speaker 1: we're white, We're like, that's the biggest on the high end.
Speaker 1: It's so white. Oh my gosh. And it was a
Speaker 1: white pet. Yeah, okay, so where were they? But do
Speaker 1: you know how an inches? How shall you are? Because
Speaker 1: I think the averages about like five inches apparently, which
Speaker 1: is which which is funny because like if you so,
Speaker 1: if you like big dicks, it's like more than five
Speaker 1: is just wasteful. Yeah, like a thick dick, thick dick,
Speaker 1: I like regular with. I like a regular with. So
Speaker 1: here's funny. I recently had sex with a guy. His
Speaker 1: stick was so big that I had the clothes I
Speaker 1: had to like close my legs together and he was
Speaker 1: kind of have sucking me through like mostly by boat
Speaker 1: like that. That was very innovative. But so you can
Speaker 1: rub your clip, that can rub your clip, and the
Speaker 1: Clinton and that's great. Yeah, I just wasn't having fun.
Speaker 1: It's not fun for me. The big dick for you,
Speaker 1: I just take it, take it somewhere. Have you ever, so, wait,
Speaker 1: what is your favorite? Is your favorite sexual act then?
Speaker 1: Because of the shallowness? Not regular intercourse? I like regular
Speaker 1: intercourse when the dick is appropriately like when it fits
Speaker 1: with me and the guy fits with me. So I'm
Speaker 1: super emotional. That's another reason why I can't just have
Speaker 1: so many casual sex just isn't for you. I wish,
Speaker 1: I wish I could, I can't, can't nothing. That was
Speaker 1: just that it was inside so so I m so
Speaker 1: after that. Yeah, I had the boyfriend in college. Sex
Speaker 1: was great with him. It was yeah, it was great.
Speaker 1: So have you ever had you ever had to deny
Speaker 1: a peen this entry after the clothes have come off? Oh? Yes, Uh?
Speaker 1: It was a guy in college. He notoriously had a
Speaker 1: big dick. His dick was so big that like girls
Speaker 1: would talk about it kind of like as like a
Speaker 1: circus attraction. So I hooked up with him, um, and
Speaker 1: I gave him a two handed blowjob where I was
Speaker 1: like grabbing the You guys can't see what I'm trying yes,
Speaker 1: it's it's like you're trying like a rope. I'm just
Speaker 1: and I just that's all I could do because it
Speaker 1: was it was literally it had to be thirteen inches
Speaker 1: least it was. I didn't even know that. I mean,
Speaker 1: it was bigger than both of my hands. It was
Speaker 1: like at least a foot. Yeah, it was. What about
Speaker 1: the thickness, it was thick, it was huge. It was
Speaker 1: it was like, how do you have sex with any
Speaker 1: person that's not a porn star? That was scared. I'm horrified. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he was just known to have this gigantic dick, and
Speaker 1: now did you tell him, hey, you can't, you can't
Speaker 1: put it in me? Probably. I was like, that's not
Speaker 1: going to me. It is like, you can you give
Speaker 1: me a handshob? I was like, sure, I'll try. I
Speaker 1: did the two handed handshops. He has a real catch
Speaker 1: twenty two because he must be like very respected by men.
Speaker 1: But then also he suddenly we can't have a satisfying
Speaker 1: sexual related with a woman. I'll never do any I
Speaker 1: mean maybe a little, but at the thought of it,
Speaker 1: so oh my god. Yeah, no, no no, no, I did
Speaker 1: not him at all. I just looked that. I don't
Speaker 1: think I've ever seen a dick that big? Have you grin?
Speaker 1: Uh not in real life? That's I don't even know.
Speaker 1: I think if if I saw it on the screen,
Speaker 1: I run away screen. I'm very particular about porn, so
Speaker 1: I wouldn't have liked that. I would have turned it
Speaker 1: right off. Giant dicks, I'm like that giantess or like
Speaker 1: anyone who seems even remotely creepy, I can't be involved
Speaker 1: with on porn. On porn sometimes that they're kind of creepy,
Speaker 1: but in a respectful way. It's kind of hot and
Speaker 1: you're like, well, but you're good. But I kind of
Speaker 1: go to just like the tattooed like suicidal Girl ones
Speaker 1: because those people rarely freak me out, the suicidey girls
Speaker 1: Junic side Girl like at suicide Girls dot com. Like
Speaker 1: it's like it's basically like a bunch of people who
Speaker 1: look like they should be on stage with Marilyn Manson
Speaker 1: and they have a lot of tattoos, and they're really
Speaker 1: really pale, and they look malnourished and they have black
Speaker 1: That's what I like, all right, It's like masturbating in
Speaker 1: the mirror an I wish I wish I looked malnourish,
Speaker 1: which I was the skidding. The problem with a big dick,
Speaker 1: they can't keep it hard. Oh really, I didn't know
Speaker 1: those dicks can't. What is it blood? I never even
Speaker 1: thought of that. That's because that's why it gets hard
Speaker 1: in the first place, all the blood and then passed out.
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, do they pass out? Does they
Speaker 1: have a big dick and they gotta get hard? Oh
Speaker 1: my god, that's so sad. They'll be all right, It'll
Speaker 1: be fine, damn alright. Yes, And I didn't until after.
Speaker 1: It was like after college. College was when I was
Speaker 1: I started drinking, started smoking. I was told about masturbation
Speaker 1: because I came to college just holier than now, proved like,
Speaker 1: I don't drink, I don't smoke, I'm a good person
Speaker 1: and not at all. I used to parade the fact
Speaker 1: that I didn't drink or smoke wheat, well mostly smoking
Speaker 1: weed around. And then I got to college and I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, yeah, exactly. It was until maybe junior
Speaker 1: senior year that I started both of all of the
Speaker 1: college Yeah, and so wait, who told you about masturbating?
Speaker 1: One of my best friendsh shout out to Oregon. She uh,
Speaker 1: we were just readily having a conversation. One day we
Speaker 1: started talking about masturbation. I don't know how, but she
Speaker 1: was just like, yeah, so you know when you masturbated.
Speaker 1: I was like, I was like, I don't masturbate. She
Speaker 1: was like like stop the press, record scratch. She was like,
Speaker 1: what you need to masturbate. It was so cute because
Speaker 1: you could tell she was like, I don't know how
Speaker 1: to tell you. I can't. She was like I can't
Speaker 1: express this to you enough, but you need to masturbate.
Speaker 1: And that stuck with me and I didn't start till
Speaker 1: maybe maybe a year after that, but I was like, Oh,
Speaker 1: what's the one to do it? Yeah, I don't worry.
Speaker 1: I don't remember. I feel like because I don't have
Speaker 1: sex a lot. So I was like, I need to
Speaker 1: start figuring out how to pleasure myself. Yeah, it works,
Speaker 1: toys or your hand or I like the bullet. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a little just rudimentary. That's a great vibreator. I
Speaker 1: like the fundamentals. I know. Sometimes they do try to
Speaker 1: get like very very fancy. Yeah it's too much. You
Speaker 1: don't need to you don't need a lot. There's a
Speaker 1: vibrator that will like go to the beat or whatever
Speaker 1: music you're playing. Vibrator, but I was like, I want
Speaker 1: one of those, but all the rabbits and the double
Speaker 1: jaws and moving because I don't I don't penetrate with
Speaker 1: a vibrator, so I'm just click figure tap, yeah, good, yeah,
Speaker 1: that I'm quick. If I watched some port I'm just quick.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. I know. That's what I try not
Speaker 1: to always have to consume porn, but it is so
Speaker 1: much faster thought because my thoughts are chterrible. I'm like yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: yeah that, I'm like, I gotta finish that pilot. That's
Speaker 1: exactly why. When it's your own thoughts and they're not
Speaker 1: guided or narrowed down by a visual, you could go anywhere.
Speaker 1: I go all over the place. It'll take me an hour.
Speaker 1: Do you have a specific type of porn that you
Speaker 1: like or do you mix it up? I am one
Speaker 1: of those people, and I don't know if this is
Speaker 1: a Virgo characteristic, but it's like, well, we like something,
Speaker 1: we just like one thing, and I'm pretty boring, so
Speaker 1: I I like, um, what do I like? I like
Speaker 1: gag bags? I say I'm bored. I say, I was like,
Speaker 1: that doesn't seem like to watch. I like to watch
Speaker 1: all this stuff I would do. Okay, well that I like.
Speaker 1: I like gag bags, I like um, I like the
Speaker 1: head top Oh yeah yeah. The cartoons which kind of cartoons,
Speaker 1: like ones that exist already, but now they're sexual like family.
Speaker 1: Oh like like the Japanese, like the animation. Honestly, they're
Speaker 1: it's gone hot. The ads pop up. It's like weirds
Speaker 1: are perfect, oh because their cartoons because yeah, because some
Speaker 1: fucking creep drew it's so weird. Uh I what else? Uh?
Speaker 1: I like? I don't like watching black women. Why why?
Speaker 1: What do you think that is? That's fascinating? I don't
Speaker 1: know why. I don't know why, because I takes you
Speaker 1: out of it. I don't like like I almost I
Speaker 1: only like people who like look basically look like me.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I can do a redhead, I do not. I
Speaker 1: can't watch blonde. Times i'll do a red yeah, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know what it is. So you
Speaker 1: only want to watch people that look like you. I
Speaker 1: refuse to watch people that look like because cartoons and
Speaker 1: ship so it's like I'll watch a black dude a
Speaker 1: white girl. I don't like watching black women, do you
Speaker 1: think it's because you like have you have you talked
Speaker 1: about therapist about this? I'm fascinative, Like do you do
Speaker 1: you think? Do you do you love yourself? I have
Speaker 1: grown to love myself. Huh. But maybe it goes along with,
Speaker 1: like you feeling like you're not being super sexual and
Speaker 1: feeling prutish and so like you like to watch things
Speaker 1: that you wouldn't do so if you were in the
Speaker 1: like if you envision yourself in the role, there has
Speaker 1: to be something to that. I'm not really I'm not
Speaker 1: big into I'm not big into reading into things. We're
Speaker 1: making things more than they are with as far as
Speaker 1: like therapy, but that is fascinating with me if I
Speaker 1: feel like sometimes with me though, I have to watch
Speaker 1: the chick has to be like so fucking hot and
Speaker 1: if they're not, I'm like, nope, they have to be
Speaker 1: and I feel like they're about that. That what's I'm
Speaker 1: watching for sex? I don't want to see. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: an aesthetic thing. Aesthetic I YEA Websites will give you
Speaker 1: literally whatever the fun you want to wash you can
Speaker 1: type it in and there you go. But damn, don't
Speaker 1: you wish you lived in a world where you could
Speaker 1: successfully arrange a gang bang now and have it be great.
Speaker 1: I've heard of that happening. Now find I'm you, do
Speaker 1: you find like? Are you like, who's your favorite aesthetically
Speaker 1: like female celebrity, who's like your girl crushed celebrity. She's
Speaker 1: so hot? Okay, So I think beautiful. So a woman
Speaker 1: of color, but not a black woman. She's I think
Speaker 1: she's the most beautiful woman in the world. There's plenty
Speaker 1: of black women I think are beautiful. But but okay,
Speaker 1: so you're not like you, you you find black women
Speaker 1: to track. I love I mean, I love being black.
Speaker 1: I love. Okay, that's good to hear. I don't know.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe it's a degrading thing. Maybe I just feel
Speaker 1: like ports degrade. Okay, okay, okay, some therapy, okay, okay.
Speaker 1: That's fascinating. That a fascinating. Oh no, I just said
Speaker 1: fascinating like that. I like that fascinating. I like that. Well,
Speaker 1: speaking of it, you do a lot of work with
Speaker 1: Lady Parts Justice. When you start working with them from
Speaker 1: the inception of it, when it was just an idea,
Speaker 1: You've been there from the first day. She uh, who
Speaker 1: was it? I think it was Peggy oh Leary packed
Speaker 1: me to do uh show. She was like, do you
Speaker 1: want to do this show where we're raising money for
Speaker 1: this new organization? And I was like sure. We did
Speaker 1: it at the Creek and then afterwards Liz like got
Speaker 1: us all together and she's like, I have this idea
Speaker 1: for this organization, and you know, we're going to come
Speaker 1: to my house and just start writing sketches and stuff
Speaker 1: like that. So we'd go to our house on Sundays
Speaker 1: and she'd make dinner and just trying to brainstorm stuff.
Speaker 1: And now it's a full blow to you because this
Speaker 1: organization is really their website is so fucking informative. It's
Speaker 1: such a great tool. Lady Parts Justice Dot, Yeah do comic?
Speaker 1: Did she explain it to you initially as like we're
Speaker 1: going to use comedy to spread awareness? Is that how okay?
Speaker 1: Exactly what it was. And I've always wanted to be
Speaker 1: involved in activism, been subway shape or for but it's
Speaker 1: like when you're pursuing comedy, you can't. It's so hard
Speaker 1: to have different to do anything else, anything else. I mean,
Speaker 1: to even have a relationship or a pet, like it's
Speaker 1: anything else. People. I think people don't really get it,
Speaker 1: and you're not making money in the meant at the
Speaker 1: beginning stage can be so sucking, you're broke, you're it's
Speaker 1: along what it's not going to be so sucking, but
Speaker 1: it might not ever not there's always a part for me,
Speaker 1: I mean anywhere in the entertainment business that has been
Speaker 1: so sucking. But you just hope that the other stuff
Speaker 1: outweighs the soul. Yeah and so yeah, so she when
Speaker 1: she posed it like that, I was like, Wow, this
Speaker 1: is a way that I could do both. I could
Speaker 1: do comedy and activism. So it's perfect. Just my heart
Speaker 1: up And and what year was that? Tweaty okay? Nice?
Speaker 1: And have you ever done escorting where you um, you
Speaker 1: walk This sounds like sex work, but stiz a form
Speaker 1: of sex work, but also escorting clinic escort, which is
Speaker 1: where you walk uh women too from their cars to
Speaker 1: the entrance of a women's health clinic or sexual past
Speaker 1: the protester And have you know, have you any any
Speaker 1: instances where you were being a clinic escort that's stuck
Speaker 1: out where either the protesters said something that made you
Speaker 1: want to punch him in the face. Because that's why
Speaker 1: I was I've always been worried about volunteering for that
Speaker 1: because I'm like, I'm gonna lose my ship. Make it
Speaker 1: about me, punch the bed face. I really good with
Speaker 1: the protesters. Really, What are some tips that they gave
Speaker 1: you to train you to do that? Well? One of
Speaker 1: the things is like you try to stay focused on
Speaker 1: the girl and and um talking to her, just making
Speaker 1: her feel comfortable, let your know what you've been through.
Speaker 1: I've had my own abortion, so it's like you can
Speaker 1: talk to them. But another thing that I do is
Speaker 1: I engage the protesters so much that they are not
Speaker 1: even paid attention to the girls going in. And I've
Speaker 1: had that extraction. Yeah, exactly, because they're so caught up
Speaker 1: at me that they're forgetting that because you're telling what
Speaker 1: do you do to I mean, I just talked to him.
Speaker 1: I just asked the questions because I love getting to
Speaker 1: the bottom of their psyche. I am so fascinated by
Speaker 1: a clinic protester. I am fucking it fascinating, especially the
Speaker 1: male one. Yeah. I don't even have most things. They're
Speaker 1: mostly met right, I was gonna say, I've only um.
Speaker 1: We interviewed a photographer m Wendy Kent, who took photos
Speaker 1: of protesters outside of abortion clinics, and I saw that,
Speaker 1: I'm like, what the fund? Could that make me even
Speaker 1: more mad? Oh? Yeah, it's infuriating if you if you
Speaker 1: look at it from that perspective, it's a face value infuriating.
Speaker 1: But talking to him. So the thing that when I
Speaker 1: talked to them, I just like to get to the
Speaker 1: bottom of of what they're doing because I'm coming from
Speaker 1: my perspective of abortion is fine with me, and I've
Speaker 1: had one, So I want you to tell me to
Speaker 1: my face, I'm a bad person. I'm going to hell
Speaker 1: and back this up with facts and information that goes
Speaker 1: beyond your you know, schooling from religion as a child.
Speaker 1: And I just I've had great conversations with these guys,
Speaker 1: Like I had a guy in Atlanta because we did
Speaker 1: a sixteen city tour last year that was two months amazing.
Speaker 1: Through all the reds were clinic escorting and we're doing shows. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was so fantastic. And the first city was Atlanta
Speaker 1: and we're going into the clinic in Atlanta and there
Speaker 1: were just two guys outside. One of them had a
Speaker 1: duck die. Yeah. They were they were the ones. They
Speaker 1: were like the stragglers because usually once all the women
Speaker 1: are in, most of the protestous leave the clinic at
Speaker 1: one time is like a time usually in the boarding
Speaker 1: there they're all coveted, and then they trickle out as
Speaker 1: the day goes on. So these are the evil men
Speaker 1: who want to wait to yell at them when they're
Speaker 1: on their way out, who don't even know what they're
Speaker 1: going into the clinic for. They could be getting birth control,
Speaker 1: our paths, or care for their child that they would
Speaker 1: like to have. Yes, yeah, so when you're escorting people,
Speaker 1: are you only escorting women who are getting abortions or
Speaker 1: can you escort anyone who's getting any service? Well, the
Speaker 1: thing is our focus, lady parts justice. Are the clinics
Speaker 1: that are just just doing abortions. Those are the ones
Speaker 1: that under the most fire outside of play a parative,
Speaker 1: because these are just the independent They do do others,
Speaker 1: but mostly their predominant service is abortion, and so they're
Speaker 1: the ones who are most likely the customer the client
Speaker 1: people they see are going in there for them, it
Speaker 1: will be set at think sevent usually their services abortion
Speaker 1: versus play a pair hoods three percent. Okay, so you
Speaker 1: got that dynasty guy and he's he's just out there
Speaker 1: and I just asking the questions. Yeah his side whatever
Speaker 1: said yeah, yeah, uh, and we're just talking back and forth.
Speaker 1: I found out he had five kids. He had five
Speaker 1: kids in that seven kids, and I was just like,
Speaker 1: are you kids? Are you like you really want more
Speaker 1: children in the world? And what I just there was
Speaker 1: an epiphany moment that I'm trying to remember right now
Speaker 1: that we had. Uh was he angry when he was
Speaker 1: talking to you? Or was he calm? He was good,
Speaker 1: he was calm um, and he just got he just
Speaker 1: started to like me as a person. I'm a yeah,
Speaker 1: you're honest, You're perfect, clinic U Do you have a temper?
Speaker 1: I have a temper when if I'd be disrespected, um consistently,
Speaker 1: then you'll go off. Yeah, but I'm passive like I
Speaker 1: was just I would just being with my roommate and
Speaker 1: I would like, I was taking the Amazon Firestick remote
Speaker 1: when I left the house. I like, no, that's good.
Speaker 1: Though sometimes it was so good. She was so bad
Speaker 1: because she was on The Handmaid's Tail finale. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: that's so fucking funny. That's really funny. I like, bitch
Speaker 1: fun with me. So that's the thing like I don't
Speaker 1: have a temper actually at all, but pushed me and
Speaker 1: I would do something up. But I'm going to be petty,
Speaker 1: way petty or than than angry. I wish. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't recall it's gonna come to me. I don't recall
Speaker 1: right now what the epiphany was with that guy. But um,
Speaker 1: what's what's the like to me? Have any of you
Speaker 1: get your number? It wasn't like that. Have you ever
Speaker 1: had a guy or a woman of a protester outside
Speaker 1: of a clinic say something that really got under your
Speaker 1: skin or that well they try one of the whenever
Speaker 1: they see a black person, they yelled black things. Oh
Speaker 1: my god. For example, one of the things that were
Speaker 1: yelled at me is, uh, Marte Luther Kick Junior did
Speaker 1: die so you could murder babies. And I'm like, I
Speaker 1: was like, what do you mean by black things? Oh?
Speaker 1: I try to inspire you. I see, you are exactly correct,
Speaker 1: Martin Luther kick did not die people so that he
Speaker 1: had nothing to do with that, actually had nothing to
Speaker 1: do with it. You are correct. So we're just saying
Speaker 1: that's fun like and it's like, I guess for a
Speaker 1: younger black girl, that's the part that makes me agree.
Speaker 1: It's like there might be a sixteen year old. We've
Speaker 1: had stories from these clinics where like it's an eleven
Speaker 1: year old that's raped by her foster father, thing like that,
Speaker 1: and then you have to walk her and then on
Speaker 1: top of all the horrible things that have happened in
Speaker 1: her life, she going to get them and so that's
Speaker 1: the problem with yeah, temper, that's that's there wasn't even
Speaker 1: anybody standing outside with a sign. Yeah. I would go
Speaker 1: up to them and punch them in the head. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's yeah. I was. I was not healthful. They especially
Speaker 1: been that poor girl. Everyone's been arrested. They said, this
Speaker 1: poor baby. She she's brought it by her foster parents,
Speaker 1: and she's talking the other girls in the record in
Speaker 1: the recovery room because they didn't know she was raped.
Speaker 1: So the parents just brought her in and kind of
Speaker 1: like like, oh that she was out on the streets, right,
Speaker 1: So the girls in the room from talking to her
Speaker 1: ended up finding out that she got raped because she's like,
Speaker 1: my daddy said that if I come here and I
Speaker 1: don't tell anybody, I could get ice cream after her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's those are the type of stories we were hearing
Speaker 1: on the road, and that's why I'm like, I will
Speaker 1: fight anyone who wants to say that we can't make
Speaker 1: this choice for ourselves. It is the ultimate choice that
Speaker 1: a man will never have to make. That's that's such
Speaker 1: a big part of it. And I know, Um, I've
Speaker 1: tried to wrap my head around people who are anti
Speaker 1: choice for very long time, and we've had people email us,
Speaker 1: men and women just kind of because I'm like, explain,
Speaker 1: please explain where you're coming from. Because you're obviously come
Speaker 1: from somewhere, and you're passionate about where you're coming from,
Speaker 1: So I would like to know where is that? What
Speaker 1: are the roots? And it's a lot of time to
Speaker 1: religion and then the baby murder, the language and then
Speaker 1: you and then honestly, Lady parts Justice, we interviewed Liz
Speaker 1: wind Said, and she was telling us about how the
Speaker 1: language that's being used and how it can be so
Speaker 1: manipulative and misleading of it. Well, we're pro life. That
Speaker 1: sounds fucking great, but no, you are anti choice. You're
Speaker 1: anti yeah, and and and a lot of them are
Speaker 1: just uh, they just don't know. And so when I
Speaker 1: go to these places, I like to talk to the
Speaker 1: young people, because at least sometimes a young person might
Speaker 1: be able to change the point of view. And I
Speaker 1: was talking to this young guy. I forget which city.
Speaker 1: We were actually at Politicon, which is uh uh like
Speaker 1: political political nerds go to this thing in l at
Speaker 1: Like it's an abortion convention. No, that's that's a different thing.
Speaker 1: I've been to that too, but yeah this yeah, yeah, abortion, Yes,
Speaker 1: it's awesome. Um. So I was talking to this young
Speaker 1: guy and he was just trying. He was trying to
Speaker 1: get to the bottom of it, like he was very
Speaker 1: contemplated it. He was like, I would get abortion. I
Speaker 1: want to talk to you about it. I was like, sure,
Speaker 1: let's talk about it. And um he was basically saying.
Speaker 1: I was like, so, you know, if a woman is
Speaker 1: raped or it says or what have you, do you
Speaker 1: think that she should be able to have an abortion.
Speaker 1: He's like, I guess I could consider it. And I
Speaker 1: was like, how big. I was like do you yes?
Speaker 1: I was like, do you understand what you just said?
Speaker 1: Like the concept of the fact that you feel like
Speaker 1: you are judging the decision of woman's making. I was like,
Speaker 1: what if a girl was just in college and she
Speaker 1: just had sex with her boyfriend accidentally got pregnant. I
Speaker 1: was like, do you think she should be able to
Speaker 1: happen a port He's like, probably not. And I was like,
Speaker 1: well that's what happened to me. And and he just
Speaker 1: wasn't expecting to have that moment in my face. I
Speaker 1: was like, tell me right now that I should have
Speaker 1: made that decision. And I can just tell something clicked
Speaker 1: in this humanize the problem for him exactly. You have
Speaker 1: you You're looking into the eyes a woman who has
Speaker 1: had that. Yeah, and it's like they never think of
Speaker 1: it that way because they don't have to. So that's
Speaker 1: what that's my goal is what I'm whatever. I'm talking
Speaker 1: to them and just try to give them a perspective
Speaker 1: that they didn't think about because they're just murderer burder burner.
Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, chill out, Yeah, that would have
Speaker 1: changed the whole course of your life had you had
Speaker 1: that child, like you probably wouldn't be sitting here right
Speaker 1: now to thank you on behalf of every person for
Speaker 1: doing that, every woman whoever has We don't need more people.
Speaker 1: I just I was I just looked at the death
Speaker 1: rate and the birth rate by day it's a lot
Speaker 1: more people being born than dying, for sure, So twice
Speaker 1: as man as technology and medicine and stuff improves, people
Speaker 1: are living longer, and so there really is this like
Speaker 1: overload of humans there. Well, I was gonna say that
Speaker 1: it is. We're the United States, is uh? Out of
Speaker 1: all the developed nations, aren't we last in um the
Speaker 1: mother giving birth? Their death rate? Oh, I know, I
Speaker 1: know it's low. We're very low. Yeah, good, because I
Speaker 1: feel like that part of it is contributed to the
Speaker 1: attitude this country fucking has about women making their own
Speaker 1: decisions and ship and just like taking care of women.
Speaker 1: It seems we just stay women. Yeah, I mean, um,
Speaker 1: and can you talk a little bit about your own
Speaker 1: I've heard you talk about your abortion before more more
Speaker 1: more so like comedically in your in your stand up set,
Speaker 1: which I love. But it's interesting to me now getting
Speaker 1: to learn more about you, because I didn't know that
Speaker 1: you were considered yourself to be prudish, and I think
Speaker 1: that's very interesting and kind of like cuts the stigma,
Speaker 1: not even this thing, but like this this preconceived notion
Speaker 1: that people have about like, oh, if you're getting abortion,
Speaker 1: you must have been just out here sucking everyone fast
Speaker 1: times out ridge want high. Uh, and so you were
Speaker 1: just having sex with your boyfriend who you just told
Speaker 1: us about the good ones. So my boyfriend college, Um,
Speaker 1: he I had had a death, a very close death
Speaker 1: in the family to me. So I was reckless. I
Speaker 1: was just in one of those modes of like, I
Speaker 1: don't care about anything, like to be taken away from
Speaker 1: you any moment exactly. And we were all the way
Speaker 1: to the funeral. Actually started to making sad guys. Uh,
Speaker 1: we're all the way to the funeral. Horny stopped. We
Speaker 1: were on an Amtrak trade and I was like, let's
Speaker 1: go fucking the bathroom where we we fucked on the floor.
Speaker 1: My handicap stalls. See, that's the grossest part. That's part
Speaker 1: I remember. There was something that I found horrific and
Speaker 1: it was definitely not the abortion part. And it was
Speaker 1: the fact that wait, if you conceived the bathroom on
Speaker 1: an Amtrak train on the way to a funeral, the
Speaker 1: way to a funeral, girls, that's so he was there.
Speaker 1: There's like there's always yrin on the floor. Okay, I
Speaker 1: really wanted some yes, and you know they'll stop that.
Speaker 1: And how do you know that that was the that
Speaker 1: was conception right there? I felt it. Really, I've heard this.
Speaker 1: I've heard this. Very close friend has had one, and
Speaker 1: she knew, she knew it was crazy. I knew what
Speaker 1: was the feeling, what the magic I mean? And it's
Speaker 1: odd enough to because if you United States say life
Speaker 1: because a conception, don't don't tell any of them these guys.
Speaker 1: But it was like the second he gave no way,
Speaker 1: it was like and I was like, it was just
Speaker 1: like a that wasn't no ordinary. Yes, I had that thought.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, I remember immediately had you hide
Speaker 1: sex without a problem before? Really, but you're on the pill.
Speaker 1: Other times I tried, I struggle with the pill because
Speaker 1: I'm not good at doing anything consistently. I was like,
Speaker 1: me too, maybe mentally crip Okay, I will also yeast,
Speaker 1: but whatever, I just I'm not good at consistent. Because
Speaker 1: so I had tried birth control, condoms, all that stuff,
Speaker 1: and my mother's a led nurse, so she's not a
Speaker 1: fan of like I U D S or or the
Speaker 1: shot or anything like. So we tried birth control, but
Speaker 1: I just couldn't take with it and once again just
Speaker 1: big reckless. So we usually pull out my fitter. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this time he didn't pull out. Okay, yeah did he ever?
Speaker 1: That should be there slogan. I don't want I don't
Speaker 1: remember felt him after after you he after you guys
Speaker 1: got up and went back to your seats from the bathroom,
Speaker 1: where You're like, I don't think so. I think I
Speaker 1: just kept as we do as women because you doubt.
Speaker 1: You're like, you don't want to like ruminate on that
Speaker 1: you're probably pregnant, So we do have fear in your
Speaker 1: heart immediately, because I would have had fear in my
Speaker 1: heart immediately. I did okay, okay, when hell no? And
Speaker 1: then when did you just took a pregnancy testing on
Speaker 1: a stick and maybe like two months later? Really? Oh
Speaker 1: I wait? I was like, were you just because you knew? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah? And then what what was your first thoughts
Speaker 1: in your head? What were the first thoughts? Once again,
Speaker 1: I because my life was in shambles at that time,
Speaker 1: because that eleven happened that year. Um so it was
Speaker 1: like nine eleven. And then died, Yeah, my cousin died,
Speaker 1: found out his grandmother who was my aunt, had cancered
Speaker 1: she was going to die, and then was pregnant. So
Speaker 1: all of that happened all at the same time, and
Speaker 1: I've been college. I'm junior in college, so I'm trying
Speaker 1: to pass classes. And it was literally it was honestly,
Speaker 1: I didn't even really care because because my mother the
Speaker 1: way my mother met my biological father, he was an
Speaker 1: abortion doctor, so she was his nurse. So I, wow,
Speaker 1: you were from a family of a family of female
Speaker 1: reproductive so I knew it was not going to be
Speaker 1: a problem when I told my mother, because I told
Speaker 1: her and she literally was like, yeah, either way, because
Speaker 1: she even said you could have the baby because I
Speaker 1: was doing the summer She was like, you could have
Speaker 1: the baby, go back, finish your senior year. I'll take
Speaker 1: care of it, and then we kid. I know that
Speaker 1: just that makes me trying to think about beautiful in it.
Speaker 1: But I was like, I can't do that to you.
Speaker 1: So and so was your boyfriend there with you at
Speaker 1: the time when you found out, Yep, I'm pregnant. Was
Speaker 1: he there? Probably? Yeah? I was probably be at school
Speaker 1: when I found out. But he wasn't there for the abortion?
Speaker 1: Why not? Because we got to an argument that day.
Speaker 1: Oh god, yes, I was alone if my mother was
Speaker 1: out of town, And did you get the procedure. Uh,
Speaker 1: not the pills, but the one the respira. Well, luckily
Speaker 1: I went to a family friend doctor, so he put
Speaker 1: me to sleep. Oh yes, I say, I have a
Speaker 1: fancy rich lady abortion. Actually, how long were you sleep for?
Speaker 1: I don't know, probably, and I want to pick you
Speaker 1: up because it doesn't somebody have to pick you up
Speaker 1: after my cousin dropped me off and picked me up. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: that's good. Oh my god, you got no. Fight was
Speaker 1: a fight about that. The fight was pretty much him
Speaker 1: being scared to come to New Jersey because he lived
Speaker 1: in Boston. He was scared to come to New Jersey
Speaker 1: because he's scared his mother would find out. And I
Speaker 1: was like, you pussy. I was like, you you balls,
Speaker 1: you set of weak as balls. The fact that you
Speaker 1: don't have to tell your mother and you to you
Speaker 1: don't have to get the abortion. Yeah, it was. It was.
Speaker 1: It was that fight and making about him totally made
Speaker 1: it about him. And then he was like, I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm scared because he would come to my house all
Speaker 1: the time during breaks, so it's like, your mother is
Speaker 1: not gonna think if you'd be like, I'm going to
Speaker 1: go to Jersey did he live with his mom? Why
Speaker 1: was he telling his mom his whereabouts at all times?
Speaker 1: But yeah, but you go home for break, but parents
Speaker 1: in Jersey time, his parents were a bust. His mother
Speaker 1: was a bust, and so like he had a report back,
Speaker 1: like why he wasn't going to be home in Boston
Speaker 1: during break and that's what the fight was about. Yeah, okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: and he was like I can't. I'm scared to tell
Speaker 1: her all that stuff. And I was like, did you
Speaker 1: break up after that? Eventually? Okay, yeah, but not like
Speaker 1: how soon after or from then? It was the slow downhill. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And also you're dealing I'm crazy people My family are
Speaker 1: die left and right, so I'm also at my wits end.
Speaker 1: So I wasn't a fun person at that time. Did
Speaker 1: you have him a repercussions from the abortion? Ah? I don't.
Speaker 1: I just feel like it was just a ship pile
Speaker 1: that year. Everything What else could we pile onto this
Speaker 1: pile of ship? So it's I'm sure if we dig deep,
Speaker 1: And that's why you don't like to watch the black
Speaker 1: women have sex though I don't great callback, I don't know, no,
Speaker 1: I just I sure, I'm sure there's some emotional repercussions,
Speaker 1: but society mostly does that to us. Yes, I agree,
Speaker 1: I agree. Um, I love the way you brought that back.
Speaker 1: I kind of like, yeah, I was like, I think
Speaker 1: that's really the perfect ending. Is there anything else you
Speaker 1: want to uh talk about or promote? What do you
Speaker 1: want to promote? Oh, I'll be going to be tomorrow.
Speaker 1: Well what is this here? In a week from this
Speaker 1: coming Friday? Okay, go on True TV this show called
Speaker 1: laugh Tracks. I am a part of that. Nice that's Eric. Well,
Speaker 1: you guys, you don't have aired already by the time
Speaker 1: you guys hear this, so just look it up. It's
Speaker 1: the shows called laugh Tracks. So that's coming out at
Speaker 1: Bus magazine. This is this month. This is the anniversary
Speaker 1: of rov Way anniversary and so that issue is out. Um.
Speaker 1: And I also, you know, I've been doing a lot
Speaker 1: of interviews about Rose anniversary. So yeah, you have a
Speaker 1: great photo, not that that's what it's about, but it
Speaker 1: didn't hurt. And where can we find you online? It
Speaker 1: comes to your stand up Yeah, Joel nicole dot com.
Speaker 1: That's my website and at Joel Nicole's everything, so Instagram, Twitter,
Speaker 1: all that stuff, and oh my god, So they put
Speaker 1: a promo for the True TV thing, and I've got
Speaker 1: like fift followers in a day. I was like, yes,
Speaker 1: that's so great to hear all the time. Yeah, oh
Speaker 1: my gosh, all right, well, thank you so much for
Speaker 1: coming and sitting down with us, also working. Yes, we're
Speaker 1: forever grateful for all the hard work you put in.
Speaker 1: You're holding for family really seriously always says that, yeah,
Speaker 1: thank you. This hasn't been guys, be fun the anti
Speaker 1: slot chaming podcast. We'll talk to you next Friday. Thank everybody.
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