Speaker 1: Not too long ago, we started a segment called Textual Healing.
Speaker 1: It's broken Jewil in the morning. Basically, we came up
Speaker 1: with the idea, tried it a few times, and then
Speaker 1: our dumb company heard it. They're always hearing things that
Speaker 1: we do. I don't know how so stupid. Anyway, they
Speaker 1: came back and they said this. They said, hey, Jorban Jebils,
Speaker 1: been the same for a long time. Yeah, okay, you
Speaker 1: do the morning thing. Yes, I do. And then they said,
Speaker 1: we heard your new segment textual Healing and loves it,
Speaker 1: but one small problem, you can't do it. We did
Speaker 1: some research and apparently some guy back in nineteen ninety
Speaker 1: eight said the phrase textual healing once Overham Radio, and
Speaker 1: technically he has the rights to that name. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: just too risky and we don't want to put the
Speaker 1: company in any legal danger. So if you want to
Speaker 1: do that segment, you're gonna have to fit said okay,
Speaker 1: all right, have a good day. Basically the requesting that
Speaker 1: we have to completely change the title, even though we
Speaker 1: haven't heard any complaints or any threats of litigations. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they're star. Instead of trying to talk some sense into
Speaker 1: the corporate suits. I thought we could maybe try to
Speaker 1: come up with a better tible Tyble. I'm already I'm
Speaker 1: already on board for Tyble. Yeah, I thought we could
Speaker 1: come up with a better title. At first, we took
Speaker 1: a look at the easy ones. Instead of textual healing,
Speaker 1: we considered textual feelings. Yeah, okay, no, well that's all right,
Speaker 1: textual dealings better, that's no, or textual squealings. I kind
Speaker 1: of like that one, you know, but it could lead
Speaker 1: to a different type of text messages that we're supposed
Speaker 1: to be sending. So nothing quite fit right. Then I
Speaker 1: just threw it in young Jeffrey's lap and said, here,
Speaker 1: you deal with this before I kissed him. And then, oh, sorry,
Speaker 1: that last part wasn't supposed to be in there. Anyway.
Speaker 1: He came up with something, and I'm not sure it
Speaker 1: will work, but I'll play it for you and see
Speaker 1: what you think. Here we okay, text and feeling text
Speaker 1: and feeling text and feeling. Now it's so, I don't know,
Speaker 1: you've lost that texting feeling sounds kind of wordy and clunky.
Speaker 1: Texting feeling text with textual therapy, texting therapy. Who knows.
Speaker 1: We might just have to switch back to textual Healing
Speaker 1: and get yelled at. But whatever it's called. That segment
Speaker 1: with the text thing, it's coming up right after this.
Speaker 1: It's Brook and Jewe One Morning Text Jubu Healing Textual.
Speaker 1: If you've never heard this segment before, working Juble in
Speaker 1: the morning, It's our new segment called Textual Healing, and basically,
Speaker 1: it's a way to help out our listeners who have
Speaker 1: an issue in the text department. Maybe they aren't good
Speaker 1: at texting, or maybe the situation is uncomfortable and they
Speaker 1: aren't sure what to text somebody, whatever it is will
Speaker 1: help them out. And when I say we, I mean
Speaker 1: everybody on the show, including young Jeffrey, is proving to
Speaker 1: be the most helpful out of all of him. It
Speaker 1: really is. I had no idea his texting game was
Speaker 1: so good, especially since every time I text him he
Speaker 1: never text me back. Sorry, maybe maybe part of the game.
Speaker 1: Your game is very good. Yeah. Who is today's honored
Speaker 1: guest that needs some tender textual healing. Her name is Jasmine. Jasmine,
Speaker 1: what's up? Welcome to the show. Hi guys, thanks for
Speaker 1: having me. Yeah, thanks for your email, and thanks for
Speaker 1: being a bad text her otherwise I wouldn't be able
Speaker 1: to talk to you. Yes, I stuck at texting. I
Speaker 1: hope you guys could help you out. I mean, this
Speaker 1: is why I'm single. I don't know. Tell us a
Speaker 1: little bit about the situation you're dealing with, and then
Speaker 1: we'll see if we can heal you textually. Okay. So
Speaker 1: basically about a week ago, I was at work and
Speaker 1: this really kind of hot guy came in and actually
Speaker 1: started talking about health insurance and wait, wait, wait, hold on,
Speaker 1: you work in insurance, right, No, I work in corporate,
Speaker 1: but somebody was coming in about health insurance, like talking
Speaker 1: about health insurance. Okay, where they have those people come
Speaker 1: in and tell you what the plans mean and what
Speaker 1: you want to sign up for or whatever. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: So he was like giving all these details and like,
Speaker 1: I'm totally not listening and dying to like talk to him.
Speaker 1: You didn't mean talk there, did you at all? I didn't,
Speaker 1: but try to keep it clean. So basically, at the
Speaker 1: end of his little presentation, he basically gave out business
Speaker 1: cards to myself and my colleagues and was like, Hey,
Speaker 1: if you guys have any questions or concerns, throw me
Speaker 1: a text. Okay, left, and so I took the card. M.
Speaker 1: I kind of feel like an idiot. I didn't look
Speaker 1: at his finger. I didn't see if he's married or not. Um. Oh,
Speaker 1: so you know nothing about this guy at all. I know,
Speaker 1: I know he works in health insurance, and I know
Speaker 1: he's hot and that's I and I know his number.
Speaker 1: So you want to text him and ask him out
Speaker 1: totally exactly what I want to do. Yeah. So, and
Speaker 1: I don't know where to start or what to say.
Speaker 1: It's such an awkward situation. Did you have any conversations
Speaker 1: with him at all? I tried to talk to him,
Speaker 1: but I actually I couldn't. I mean, so many people
Speaker 1: were asking questions about health insurance and it was nothing personal,
Speaker 1: but he was answering a lot of other people's questions,
Speaker 1: so I didn't get close to him. You're like, shut
Speaker 1: up about the PPOs already. I just want to know
Speaker 1: it for single. She's like, well, if I'm single eligible,
Speaker 1: wait are you? So? I'm guessing you're first text him
Speaker 1: probably needs to not be asking him out straight up.
Speaker 1: You probably want to play it off like you're asking
Speaker 1: a question about the healthcare first, right? Really? Nor? Wait?
Speaker 1: Hold up? Her first text needs to be defining who
Speaker 1: she is, because he may not even that's true because
Speaker 1: he probably does a lot of these Yeah, totally, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we've gone to these. There's always tons of people. Yeah,
Speaker 1: remember me on the sexy brunette in the corner that
Speaker 1: you gave your number two. Yeah, that's a good point, though.
Speaker 1: That is probably what you should do, because I'm sure
Speaker 1: he has a lot of these meetings all the time
Speaker 1: and hands his business card out to a lot of people.
Speaker 1: So you want to almost want to send him a
Speaker 1: picture of me, like be like, Hi, this is what
Speaker 1: I look like. This never mean, oh, I got an
Speaker 1: idea for a picture that might get you a day
Speaker 1: shame for that, though. Send a picture of yourself with
Speaker 1: your face in it and ask about, like, is this
Speaker 1: thing on my neck covered under some sort of plan? No,
Speaker 1: I'm saying I like the picture, Jeffrey, I don't like
Speaker 1: this thing on my neck. I'm just trying to keep
Speaker 1: it in healthcare. Or a flirty picture of yourself and saying, hey,
Speaker 1: I need some clarification on birth control because I don't
Speaker 1: use it. Some day someone that doesn't even birth control,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Maybe he's into that, but I don't know,
Speaker 1: that's not me. Just yeah, I think maybe sure, like
Speaker 1: maybe we wait on the picture, like can we just
Speaker 1: start saying like, hi, I'm so and sol this is
Speaker 1: vering met like what I tant to think A picture.
Speaker 1: I kind of think a picture is a good idea
Speaker 1: because you could say, like, I know you mean a
Speaker 1: lot of people, this is me and send like the
Speaker 1: cutest picture you have. But if that's the first thing
Speaker 1: he gets, he's gonna be like, whoa, why is this
Speaker 1: lady sending pictures? I think you explain it, she explained,
Speaker 1: married and his wife sees it or or girlfriend. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm with you. I think you don't start with the picture.
Speaker 1: I think the picture comes, but not right off the bat.
Speaker 1: I think you say, hey, it's Jasmine from whatever business
Speaker 1: you work at. Great presentation. I have a question. I
Speaker 1: have a question winky face there or a smiley face? Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: smiley you don't do winky too soon. I'm getting so excited.
Speaker 1: I think that's a that's a good idea though, like
Speaker 1: a smiley face. Okay, I'm going to do this while
Speaker 1: you're here, So just I'm nervous the segment would be
Speaker 1: really bad. All right, let me let me text him
Speaker 1: and see what happens. Okay, Hey, it's Jasmine. We met
Speaker 1: last week when you came to the office talking about healthcare.
Speaker 1: I have a question. Yeah, I have a question. I
Speaker 1: like the compliment, though, Brooke also brought up like nice presentation.
Speaker 1: I like complimenting him, like a great presentation. Thank you.
Speaker 1: I have a question. You make insurance sexy. So, hey,
Speaker 1: it's Jasmine. We met last week when you came to
Speaker 1: the office talking about healthcare. You gave a great presentation.
Speaker 1: I have a question for you. Dot dot dot's smiley face.
Speaker 1: And then if he writes back, I'm married, leave me alone,
Speaker 1: then then you have to go hard. Yeah. Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: Well so you sent it. You did send it? Send it? Okay, cool,
Speaker 1: Well hang on one second. We'll play a song and
Speaker 1: we'll come back and we'll see if we get a
Speaker 1: response in that time. Okay, okay, all right, hang on.
Speaker 1: Text Jubu Healing Textual. Right in the middle of Textual Healing,
Speaker 1: our news segment where we help people who are bad
Speaker 1: at texting and on the phone with us right now
Speaker 1: is Jasmine. She was trying to figure out how to
Speaker 1: text a dude that came into her work the other
Speaker 1: day to tell them about their health benefits. She thought
Speaker 1: he was cute. He gave everybody's business card and said
Speaker 1: she'd be a text if you have any questions. And
Speaker 1: she has a question that has nothing to do with
Speaker 1: health benefits for now, until she gets pregnant, and then
Speaker 1: she might have questions. She wanted to figure out how
Speaker 1: to text him to ask him out, and so far
Speaker 1: she sent him one text, Jasmine read exactly what you
Speaker 1: said off, I said, Hey, it's Jasmine. We met last
Speaker 1: when you came to the office talking about healthcare. You
Speaker 1: gave a great presentation. I have a question for you
Speaker 1: dot Miley thanky, okay, that's gay And do you have
Speaker 1: a response yet? Yeah? Okay, Because the problem with this
Speaker 1: guy too is you know nothing about him. You don't
Speaker 1: know if he's single, you don't know if he's married.
Speaker 1: What did he say? He said, Oh, thanks for the compliment, Jasmine,
Speaker 1: exclamation point, How can I help you? Well? Okay, that
Speaker 1: is he's coming on to you now. Left it open
Speaker 1: for anything you want to do. So earlier we had
Speaker 1: discussed sending him a picture, a cute picture of you
Speaker 1: to remind him who you were and sort of also
Speaker 1: throw yourself out there. Do you still want to send
Speaker 1: him a picture? I mean, he knows my name now,
Speaker 1: maybe I say why not? I mean, what do you
Speaker 1: guys think? I think I guess it would be okay.
Speaker 1: I was trying to like vague ways to do it.
Speaker 1: What if we just got strayed into asking if he's single? Instead,
Speaker 1: I'll try to play tricks with him. Just you can
Speaker 1: text him like you could say my question is are
Speaker 1: you single? No, and then send a picture and then
Speaker 1: say lol. That way, if he texts back while it's inappropriate,
Speaker 1: you're like I was kidding. Lol. Always eases anything. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it does make it SOFTERO. He's not going to know
Speaker 1: him to it like it's going to be. If he's single,
Speaker 1: he will tell you say yeah I'm single. If he's single,
Speaker 1: he already thinks you're into him because you text him.
Speaker 1: Guys respond well to when you're directing up front. It
Speaker 1: like takes them back and it like makes them really honest. Okay,
Speaker 1: let's do it. My question is are you single? And
Speaker 1: send a picture? Do you have a picture in mine?
Speaker 1: You already want to send photo? Yeah? Yeah, no, that's
Speaker 1: even more flirty though. Yeah, he needs to know what
Speaker 1: he's agreeing to here too. Yeah, wait for the picture
Speaker 1: and tell you hear if he's single or not. No,
Speaker 1: you put it all on the line right now, Brook,
Speaker 1: You gotta put it up front. Take him off guard,
Speaker 1: don't let him compose himself. Read and he comes into
Speaker 1: the freaking place of work next time to give his presentation,
Speaker 1: he'll remember exactly who ask it. Freaking like the picture enough,
Speaker 1: he'll be single. Yeah, kind of picture pure. If he
Speaker 1: likes her, he's gonna go look her up anyway, her pictures.
Speaker 1: So I guess, no picture. I do not agree with
Speaker 1: the picture in the middle. I don't know, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. I'm just gonna send him the picture. No,
Speaker 1: you guys are making a good points, I know. But
Speaker 1: you guys are making good points. Get to the point,
Speaker 1: and to be honest. I mean, I think if he
Speaker 1: sees my picture, I mean, I'm cute, you know, maybe
Speaker 1: he'll be more apt to be straight with me back
Speaker 1: well and tell me what he thinks. I'm not totally
Speaker 1: for this, but I will say in case there's an
Speaker 1: ugo Jasmine that's been in one of his presentations, up
Speaker 1: with that girlie, Well, okay, I'll like now I'm aunty.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna text him. You should be any I love
Speaker 1: this all right, I'm texting right now. My question is
Speaker 1: Dota Dot are you single? Question mark l ol? Yes,
Speaker 1: and attaching a photo which I'm going to send a
Speaker 1: photo from like the waist up. It's very it's conservative
Speaker 1: but still sexy, not showing too much. Okay, yeah, your
Speaker 1: LinkedIn profile? Prey. There you go. Okay, okay, okay, let
Speaker 1: me let me get it real quick. Hold on. I
Speaker 1: love this is direct? Is good? I like this line. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm sending it. Sorry, looks so if he texts back
Speaker 1: that he is single, then good, we can text him
Speaker 1: some more. If he texts back that he's not single,
Speaker 1: do you still want to try to get a date
Speaker 1: with him? No? I try to like win him over jasmine, like,
Speaker 1: oh you have four kids. We'll guess what the Yeah,
Speaker 1: he has the like red thing like where it tells
Speaker 1: you if he read it and he just read it,
Speaker 1: so oh sweet? Who has that? Why would anyone put
Speaker 1: a red notification on the people it says it says
Speaker 1: they read the message. I know, I take that off.
Speaker 1: Some people don't know what I read my stuff? Technology,
Speaker 1: what's that Jasmine I'm seeing dot oh sweet okay, I
Speaker 1: message on UM. He wrote back kind though, dot dot
Speaker 1: dot kind that means he's in a relationship, but he's
Speaker 1: open because you're cute, or he's dating someone they're on
Speaker 1: a fish Yeah, which still is leaves the door open
Speaker 1: for you. Maybe that's your question, what kind of kind
Speaker 1: of No, now she's grilling him. You can't be like
Speaker 1: grilling him about his relationships. Now you have to start
Speaker 1: to be flirty with him. Yeah, now you have to.
Speaker 1: Now you have to be like, oh, kind of well,
Speaker 1: I kind of wanted to hang out with you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I like using his words, Jeffrey. That was good. I
Speaker 1: feel like Jeffrey's gonna get a date with him. Guys,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm not coming off as like a slot right, Like,
Speaker 1: I'm not coming out. Do you want okay? Because if
Speaker 1: you wanted to, we could probably help you do that,
Speaker 1: but we didn't. We didn't see the picture that you
Speaker 1: sent though, so maybe okay. So I said, oh, damn, Dash,
Speaker 1: well I kind of wanted to hang out. But if
Speaker 1: that's not an option, dot dot dot, I like that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that makes it that okay. He has to respond, We're
Speaker 1: a good team. Definitely, he's definitely paying attention. Now hopefully
Speaker 1: he text back quick for sure. Okay, I'm literally okay, sem,
Speaker 1: what's the thing that will make you not go out
Speaker 1: with him? If he says divorced but they're still technically
Speaker 1: together that kind of thing, or you don't really care,
Speaker 1: you just want to go out with him no matter what.
Speaker 1: I'm not really into being a home wrecker. So I mean,
Speaker 1: if he's seen somebody or with somebody, I kind of
Speaker 1: don't want to deal with that. I mean, if he's
Speaker 1: like on the market, I'm like, just got divorced or
Speaker 1: out of relationship. I'm I'm down to like explore but
Speaker 1: good Yeah wait wait, I'm sorry, Guys, he's like text
Speaker 1: him back? Oh uh okay, I don't know what this means?
Speaker 1: What what did he say? It's kind of a complicated situation,
Speaker 1: tough to explain over text. What does that mean? That
Speaker 1: means he wants to hang out with you? What does
Speaker 1: mean he wants to get together? And explain exactly what
Speaker 1: kind of single mean? What is this situation? Yeah? Who cares? Guys,
Speaker 1: he wants to hang out with me. Yeah, you're gonna
Speaker 1: get your as You'll get your answer that one. Now,
Speaker 1: whatever you do when you hang out with him, don't
Speaker 1: drink too much until you find out what his single
Speaker 1: status actually is. Could I just like, I don't know what?
Speaker 1: Could I just ask him out anyway, or like throw
Speaker 1: like a lunch date or something. Hell, there's a sober
Speaker 1: day date. If she's wants a sober date, this is
Speaker 1: a date. Maybe he's in a relationship. Maybe it shouldn't
Speaker 1: be drinking. Maybe he's in a relationship. It doesn't take
Speaker 1: drinks to explain it. You could ask me if you
Speaker 1: wants to go to an escape room? What he I
Speaker 1: don't know. I hear those are fun everyone. Then you
Speaker 1: want to go to mini golf? Or what about brunch?
Speaker 1: Brunch has drink, Brunch is sexies on the weekend most
Speaker 1: And if you don't like his answer about the single thing,
Speaker 1: then you can ditch him before it's like noon and
Speaker 1: you're gone. You want if he's in a relationship or married,
Speaker 1: he's not gonna have brunch. It like that won't be
Speaker 1: available to yam with his girlfriend. Okay, so she I
Speaker 1: should ask. I would just say you want to link
Speaker 1: up for brunch? Yeah? I wonder if you just texted
Speaker 1: brunch with a question mark. Yeah, that a little mimosa. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're getting it broken. I'm good at this. God, just
Speaker 1: because I'm married doesn't put me off the market and
Speaker 1: being able to text other people. Okay, so did you
Speaker 1: text him of the brunch thing? Yeah? And he's gonna
Speaker 1: think crazy because I keep putting like he probably sees
Speaker 1: dot dot dot, and then it's going away like typing, deleting, typing, deleting, typing, deleting, typing, deleting.
Speaker 1: And then all you said was one word little does
Speaker 1: he know? Does you know? Okay, all right, he read it?
Speaker 1: What happened? I cannot believe he has that on there.
Speaker 1: I know read receipts are weird. I never I don't
Speaker 1: want people knowing when I've read something. Yeah, and then
Speaker 1: how do you make up and yes, of course you
Speaker 1: can turn them off? And then how do you make
Speaker 1: up an excuse like, oh my god, I just saw yours.
Speaker 1: I'm just responding. When you ignore somebody, you need to
Speaker 1: try to lie to him like you actually wanted to respond.
Speaker 1: It makes it so much more different. Guys are shady.
Speaker 1: Just leave it all way? Oh okay, oh oh my god?
Speaker 1: What did he say to Bruns sounds like a good laugh.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, did you get that? Sounds like a
Speaker 1: jump junk pick? Oh my god, I don't even know
Speaker 1: what to say. Wait, sounds great. G two, g you
Speaker 1: gotta go. She's home. What did you say? Who's home?
Speaker 1: She like, he's home? Not she? He? So? What am
Speaker 1: I missing here? What's I don't hold us? He said,
Speaker 1: sounds great, gotta go. He's home. Oh, someone just got
Speaker 1: home his roommate like his boyfriend. What does this mean?
Speaker 1: What does this mean? Is this is why? It is
Speaker 1: like this? Okay? Wait, hold on this. Are you out
Speaker 1: if he's buy? No, okay, if he's buy, But are
Speaker 1: you out? Are you out if he's cheating on his boyfriend? Yeah? Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, Well at least we found out sort of.
Speaker 1: Maybe what kind of single means? I don't know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he just texted me back one more time. Wait, he
Speaker 1: tacked him? He texted twice in a row. He texted
Speaker 1: twice in a row. I swear to god I did
Speaker 1: not text him, and he put astris roommates. Oh, so
Speaker 1: by he means his roommate. He's a curious one. He's
Speaker 1: a he's a curious one. I don't know I'm just
Speaker 1: thinking curious. We're not totally sure. If he's curious, damn it,
Speaker 1: I walked right into that. Well. Keep us updated and
Speaker 1: just absolutely email us after you guys have brunch, Could
Speaker 1: you do brunch suit? That's my only request because I
Speaker 1: don't want to wait out one what's going to happen.
Speaker 1: Brook needs the gossip now to know who he is.
Speaker 1: I still don't believe the roommate thing.