Speaker 1: Two hopeless on the right. The question is whose love
Speaker 1: life is more tragic. It's Battle of Tinder Dates. It's
Speaker 1: Brook and Jubble in the morning. And if you were
Speaker 1: to turn Taylor Swift's love life into a game show,
Speaker 1: it'd probably be this segment right here. It's called Battle
Speaker 1: of the Tinder Dates. Or we pose two of our
Speaker 1: listeners against each other to find out whose dating life
Speaker 1: is the most tragic. We'll explain the rules in just
Speaker 1: a second, but first let's meet today's contestants. In this corner,
Speaker 1: she's drunk till her at so many times even her
Speaker 1: phone has started rolling its eyes. It's call me crazy, Cassidy.
Speaker 1: What's up, Cassidy? Hey guys, how are you hey? Crazy?
Speaker 1: And in the other corner, she's cried off her mask
Speaker 1: era so many times that she now does her makeup
Speaker 1: with sharpie. It's weeping windy. Hello, Hello, Oh so both
Speaker 1: you guys. Here's how the game works. One contestant will
Speaker 1: tell a short story about a terrible dating experience that
Speaker 1: they've had. Then the other one will counter with a
Speaker 1: nightmare dating story of their own, and we'll go back
Speaker 1: and forth for three rounds, and at the end we'll
Speaker 1: vote on a winner. All right, let's start with Cassidy. Cassidy, Yes,
Speaker 1: go for it. Okay. So I was supposed to meet
Speaker 1: a guy out for dinner, which I did in about
Speaker 1: like five ten minutes into it. I could just tell
Speaker 1: he wasn't interested. He basically told me that he accidentally
Speaker 1: already ate dinner ten minutes prior to that. Let's accidentally,
Speaker 1: how do you accidentally eat dinner? Yeah, it was quite bizarre.
Speaker 1: It was very odd accidental dinner. All right, Wendy, it's
Speaker 1: your turn to counter. So I went out with this
Speaker 1: guy and he told me that I shouldn't have worn
Speaker 1: heels on our date because he said I was walking
Speaker 1: like a dog that someone had just put socks on. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's a that's a rude comment. But it is also
Speaker 1: a great picture. Like that's a great way to describe it.
Speaker 1: I mean the imagery. We all can see it, right,
Speaker 1: I want great and yield. I don't know what he
Speaker 1: was talking about. We know your type. It's okay, just
Speaker 1: be honest. Okay, crazy Cassidy, your return for round number two. Okay,
Speaker 1: So you guys know the Rainforest Cafe. Yeah, yeah, you
Speaker 1: went on a date to the Rainforest Cafe. Are you
Speaker 1: just going to drop the mic right there because you
Speaker 1: could just end it right there? Yeah. Wait, wait, it
Speaker 1: gets better. So you know how they sound the thunderstorm
Speaker 1: and the monkey sounds. Yeah, well this guy got really
Speaker 1: excited and actually started making the monkey sounds and just
Speaker 1: pup and around and being completely obnoxious, and so he
Speaker 1: turned into a live version of the Rainforest Cafe for you.
Speaker 1: It was like dinner in a show altogether, or a
Speaker 1: very excited three year old. It was so embarrassing, Like,
Speaker 1: I was mortified. Okay, Wendy, can you beat going out
Speaker 1: with some dude who's really super excited about the Rainforest Cafe?
Speaker 1: So I went out with the Sky and he told
Speaker 1: me on the date that his girlfriend moved out yesterday.
Speaker 1: Oh and then he starts crying and I didn't say
Speaker 1: ex girlfriend either, He said girlfriend exactly. Did you have
Speaker 1: to just hold him for the rest of the day. Well, no,
Speaker 1: that's not even the worst part. What's the worst part?
Speaker 1: He said, The only thing that would make him feel
Speaker 1: better is if I'm move in that nice Yeah, and
Speaker 1: I'm guessing, because you're on Battle of the Tender Dates,
Speaker 1: you didn't move in and you're not living happily ever
Speaker 1: after with him. No, but you know, if he had
Speaker 1: some sweet pet house apartment, you would have made considered it.
Speaker 1: Let's just say he did not have a pet house apartment,
Speaker 1: all right, So now it's time for round number three. Cassidy. Well,
Speaker 1: I went out with the skuy. We were supposed to
Speaker 1: split two bottles of wine. I had about a glass
Speaker 1: glass and a half out of it. He had the rest,
Speaker 1: and things were getting a little crazy. Went back to
Speaker 1: my house. I did sleep with him. However, in the
Speaker 1: middle of the night, I could feel him like moving around,
Speaker 1: and I wake up to find him peeing off the
Speaker 1: side of my bed a little drunk, but not on
Speaker 1: your bed. So there's a positive there. You're silver lying.
Speaker 1: He would have made it to the balcony, which is
Speaker 1: three steps away. You know, for some people that could
Speaker 1: be a successful date. But I guess that was a
Speaker 1: bathroom for you, Wendy. Do you think you can beat that?
Speaker 1: So I was hanging out at this guy's place and
Speaker 1: we're watching TV on his couch and he made some
Speaker 1: comment on how my nails were really long and whatever.
Speaker 1: It was not that weird, and I ended up falling
Speaker 1: asleep and then I woke up to him biting my nail. Yeah,
Speaker 1: what did you do? I immediately like whipped my hand away.
Speaker 1: I was like, what are you doing? And I left
Speaker 1: immediately after that. I was done nothing wrong with the
Speaker 1: middle of the night manicure. That was the end of
Speaker 1: round number three. So now we have to throw it
Speaker 1: over to the judges and see how they scored the fight.
Speaker 1: Let's start with Brooke. Well, you know, call me crazy
Speaker 1: Cassidy in that rainforest cafe. She started to really win
Speaker 1: over my heart on that one. But my bill has
Speaker 1: to go for Wendy due solely to the fact that
Speaker 1: she has some dude biting her nails. That is so weird.
Speaker 1: All right, Brook scores the fight for Wendy. Jose, how
Speaker 1: do you score it? Dude biting your nails in the
Speaker 1: middle of the night. That's crazy? When you win, all right,
Speaker 1: I guess it doesn't matter what I think. So congratulations Wendy,
Speaker 1: you won this round of Battle of the Tender Dates.
Speaker 1: You're the grand Champion of Sadness and that's a parting
Speaker 1: Gifts will give you a lifetime supply pepper spray because
Speaker 1: you're probably gonna need it at some point. I needed
Speaker 1: it that night is when I need It's a little
Speaker 1: too late, did well. Thank you guys for playing, And
Speaker 1: if you want to play battle the tender dates just
Speaker 1: hit us up Texas seven eight, five, nine two. Then
Speaker 1: you have a horrible dating story and maybe you two
Speaker 1: can one time be as sad as windy Nobody. All right,
Speaker 1: your phone TAP's coming up right after this. It's broken,
Speaker 1: Jewel to move.