Speaker 1: Hey, fucker's what up? It's Christina Hutchinson and Karin Fisher.
Speaker 1: You're about to listen to a clip of Guys We
Speaker 1: Sucked the Anti Slutch Chain podcast. This week's guest is
Speaker 1: Sama Sadique. You may have seen him on America's Got
Speaker 1: Talent or Hurt him as co host of the Mango
Speaker 1: Bay podcast. Uh. He's going to talk about growing up
Speaker 1: and with the effects of Islam on sexuality, holding it
Speaker 1: in until you're twenty one and then letting it out.
Speaker 1: Let the wind make you come, letting it out everywhere,
Speaker 1: everything that you didn't let out in your brother's bed.
Speaker 1: You know what, this is not your dick up, your button,
Speaker 1: it all around. It sounds question most you're gonna have
Speaker 1: to really press play. And if you want more content
Speaker 1: from creators like Us Russell Brand, Lena Dunham, Trevor, Noah Rock,
Speaker 1: sand Gay, Michael Rappaport, you're gonna head over to Luminary
Speaker 1: podcast dot com slash GWF, where you can get a
Speaker 1: subscription for as little as to a month. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: this is such a weird thing. But like he told me,
Speaker 1: like how did jack off? And I didn't believe he
Speaker 1: told you how what did he say? He was like,
Speaker 1: grab your dick and then up and down. And I
Speaker 1: was a good friends, a good friend, and then he
Speaker 1: did it for me and I was like, this is
Speaker 1: even a better really sweet friend. Some guys had circle
Speaker 1: jerks to their sexuality, right. Uh So then he when
Speaker 1: you told me, I was like I didn't believe him.
Speaker 1: I was like very skeptical. I was like, this is
Speaker 1: not gonna work. What the fun I don't need to
Speaker 1: believe it exactly. So I was like, this is this
Speaker 1: is stupid, this is something crazy, but I'll do it.
Speaker 1: But so I went home at my parents house. They're
Speaker 1: all sleeping. I had a nice computer, and I went
Speaker 1: to the computer and I typed in like butt dot
Speaker 1: com or something that was like how do I get
Speaker 1: to what I want? Right? And then but scalore and
Speaker 1: then I m found a butt and I was like
Speaker 1: just skeptically, like all right here we go. Yeah, wow,
Speaker 1: you really were on the edge of I just a
Speaker 1: button detached from anything else did it for you? Literally?
Speaker 1: It was like act. It wasn't even turned on by pears.
Speaker 1: It was odd um. Yeah, I started skeptical, Jack just
Speaker 1: like okay, if fine, okay, if I whoa, and then
Speaker 1: I think, yes, I came for thirteen minutes just but
Speaker 1: really like how long, Like it was a long come.
Speaker 1: It was a very very long time. It's not like
Speaker 1: it was all to come for ten years, but it
Speaker 1: was a very large getting it out on your brother
Speaker 1: You're brothers, brothers back in sheets. Yeah, yeah, oh my god.
Speaker 1: So when it first happened, I it was a dangerous
Speaker 1: thing because I still was very Muslim, so I couldn't
Speaker 1: jack off because it was against the Islam. Right doesn't
Speaker 1: say you can't jack off. It's more it's in the
Speaker 1: in the Hadith, the Koran, which is the main book,
Speaker 1: and there's more like a game of telecommandments telephone with
Speaker 1: a lot of different leaders. So it's like kind of
Speaker 1: the one where's the etiquet one right vision Deuteronomy ship,
Speaker 1: like don't wear pink T shirt on day right. So
Speaker 1: it was that level. And I remember I used to
Speaker 1: make deals with God about backing off, Like listen, if
Speaker 1: I get an A in Humanities, I won't jack off
Speaker 1: for three weeks. Then that's how I do it. Oh,
Speaker 1: I would say, if you get an A, you could
Speaker 1: jack off. The A was what I wanted as a
Speaker 1: brown kid, the brown kid. The thing I wanted more
Speaker 1: than anything was in A because I was a brown
Speaker 1: little more than coming. I got the A and I
Speaker 1: felt so good that I came, you know. So you know,
Speaker 1: back then it was very much that that kind of
Speaker 1: given get Wow. So what got you out of being
Speaker 1: so Muslim? As you put it, I started comedy. Comedy
Speaker 1: really did everything for my life current because I was
Speaker 1: very like, I lived very passively. I was very like,
Speaker 1: my my neurons fired well enough that I could get
Speaker 1: any class short. You know, I was just a high
Speaker 1: functioning brain kid. But I didn't really learn anything. You
Speaker 1: don't say, I don't give a about life. I was
Speaker 1: passively just to right. Knowledge didn't have mean anything to me.
Speaker 1: It was just a way to succeed. When I started comedy,
Speaker 1: I started feeling I realized that if you want to
Speaker 1: do good jokes, you have to learn a lot about
Speaker 1: different ship. And that's when there was like a a
Speaker 1: prerogative to be like learned. Shit. I've never had that
Speaker 1: desire to learn. I was just you never saw the
Speaker 1: fruits of the label. And it is nothing really bullshit,
Speaker 1: It's really not really you're not really understanding fruits, and
Speaker 1: then you start like pursuing knowledge for knowledge of sake,
Speaker 1: You're like, what the fund is this? That's when you
Speaker 1: retain it. That's when you're having a good time with
Speaker 1: life and everything. Every moment means something. I started crying
Speaker 1: during movies at that time because I could feel empathy.
Speaker 1: All of a sudden, I understood if other's love, like
Speaker 1: it's crazy, and they clicked in It's comedy saved a
Speaker 1: lot of who I am? Who I Am is all
Speaker 1: because and it shows because you're so freaking funny and
Speaker 1: you're you're you're really always have new bits and it's
Speaker 1: like you're writing is really good. So it shows that
Speaker 1: you give a ship, which is just the best thing
Speaker 1: to say fellow comic, Um, thank you. And part of
Speaker 1: that give a ship probably comes from like that intense
Speaker 1: focusedness of before that was just like drilled in and
Speaker 1: now I have that as like a residual kind of thing. Um.
Speaker 1: But yeah, when they started comedy that was big and
Speaker 1: then went between New York and started sucking and it
Speaker 1: was just like, okay, you started sucking, did you get
Speaker 1: into any deviant ship like fun sex stuff like sexually
Speaker 1: adventurous exploring in the beginning missionary wasn't say like you're like,
Speaker 1: what the fuck? Right? Then slowly in New York everyone's down.
Speaker 1: Everyone was just ready to go. So it's slowly it
Speaker 1: was all girls, Like all all the women in my
Speaker 1: life in New York are the ones who brought me
Speaker 1: up because I was good, dude, I don't know what
Speaker 1: the fun was going on. I was just cannot tell
Speaker 1: when women want to dude. It was and at Islam
Speaker 1: to that so like and you know, even even white
Speaker 1: white dudes who have like two sisters don't know what
Speaker 1: is going He didn't watch your sisters live. Yeah, that
Speaker 1: I grew up with a lot of women in my
Speaker 1: life doesn't really mean that anything, Right, how many sis
Speaker 1: you have? I have no sisters, one older brother. This
Speaker 1: is the white trash thing. I have no siblings. But
Speaker 1: like people, my mom lived in a No, I didn't
Speaker 1: grew up around not a lot, but my mom lived
Speaker 1: in a car for a couple of months and no
Speaker 1: one told me where she was. And I was like, okay,
Speaker 1: all and then I had to work at the flea
Speaker 1: markets from age like eight to so New Jersey. Okay,
Speaker 1: yeah that's very different, very different. Yeah, I had a
Speaker 1: very normal upbringing for a comic. These were mistakes I
Speaker 1: made on my own, nothing to do with my family. Yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I mean that is true. I actually like did like
Speaker 1: actively get myself into trouble because there was just none
Speaker 1: at home. I feel your parents are loving it, like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, she's so spirited. Yeah, you know my parents.
Speaker 1: My parents heard that I'm a comedian, you know, like
Speaker 1: that's like entertainment was very valued in my house growing up,
Speaker 1: So this was not no problem to get into this
Speaker 1: business for me. Yeah. So when I went when I was,
Speaker 1: you know, learning sex from women in New York, it
Speaker 1: was patients. Yeah, cool women who were like, this is
Speaker 1: I put a finger in a butt? Okay, you to
Speaker 1: stick it in right, You do a little swirl and
Speaker 1: then you figure it out. That's the first thing you
Speaker 1: wanted to get into with sticking fingers and an example. Chronologically, Um,
Speaker 1: just weird that that's what you I felt like. There
Speaker 1: are a couple of milestones, okay, I mean, you know,
Speaker 1: first the first milestone was was kind of a sex
Speaker 1: in New York. Then a milestone was annual in New
Speaker 1: York was big. That sounds like a New York. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a sequel and Awakened Boise. Those are the three,
Speaker 1: um and then the third. One of the biggest ones
Speaker 1: recently was a girl put on like these random finger
Speaker 1: condoms and then put her finger up my button. Yeah,
Speaker 1: really ran in there, and then I passed out, Like start,
Speaker 1: I passed out. She must have like broken some barrier.
Speaker 1: I just literally just got up and I just passed
Speaker 1: out and not fell asleep, but you like you know,
Speaker 1: I really just fell down. Your body was like like
Speaker 1: it was weird. It was like, so this girl readomly
Speaker 1: on Facebook. She's like listening, come funk, I want to
Speaker 1: do things to you. I'm like, all right on Facebook?
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, she want the last remaining. That's where all
Speaker 1: the weirdos are still at. I don't know if you
Speaker 1: are looking at all the conspiracies. Oh yeah, Adrina Krome
Speaker 1: is a new one for all these old ladies. But
Speaker 1: this girl was, I guess. So she's like, hey, um,
Speaker 1: come come over, what do you want? And I was
Speaker 1: like one of my fantasies as meeting a girl not
Speaker 1: saying anything to her and then just sucking yeah right,
Speaker 1: just like no talk, and she's like, yeah, just come over,
Speaker 1: we'll do it. So I go over there, right, we
Speaker 1: start sucking, and then she just like that saying a word,
Speaker 1: put on this like this depth this condom on her finger.
Speaker 1: I was like, just all, what is that. She's not
Speaker 1: telling you what she's about. She's like she didn't look
Speaker 1: a little back in and she's like and I'm like,
Speaker 1: all right, let's do it. You knew what that meant
Speaker 1: right of the booty of the booty and she went
Speaker 1: in there. It felt super good. I was like, this
Speaker 1: is really cool. It was like really blowing. That was crazy.
Speaker 1: I was like really feeling. I was like, oh my god.
Speaker 1: And then after she kind of like I didn't come
Speaker 1: up from it, but like she like took it out.
Speaker 1: I was like, wow, that was cool. This is my
Speaker 1: new voice now. And uh. I get from the bed
Speaker 1: and then I just like and I just fall down
Speaker 1: on the ground. I kind of like lay there. Did
Speaker 1: you hit your head? It hit my head, just kind
Speaker 1: of fell on my shoulder. Ever, and then she was
Speaker 1: like whoa ship, very like now our first time ever
Speaker 1: that happened. She runs to the fridge, gets chilled peaches,
Speaker 1: just get these like little peaches that are chilled, starts
Speaker 1: feeding me chilled peaches. Well, I'm kind of like laying
Speaker 1: service super weird. And then she was like, we just
Speaker 1: don't have like sprinkled something. I don't know, maybe that
Speaker 1: the roof feed peaches. But it was good. And I
Speaker 1: was like and she was like feeling okay, and I
Speaker 1: was like, I'm a little scared, but you know, this
Speaker 1: is okay, and she's like, okay, you can get up.
Speaker 1: I kind of got up, fell again, this time head
Speaker 1: on the door, knob on the bathroom, and I'm laying
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, what's going about? Twice shame
Speaker 1: on me? Yeah, I gotta figure what's going through your head?
Speaker 1: Did you think it was to think you're like poisoned
Speaker 1: or something. I don't know what was going out because
Speaker 1: you didn't know this. I don't know this go at all.
Speaker 1: So I was a little scared that she might have
Speaker 1: like did something something on the but because that's what
Speaker 1: there was like, I don't know what, Rosemary, I don't
Speaker 1: know what you put in it in her in my butt,
Speaker 1: but it was not it was like reacting against it.
Speaker 1: And then I cont was like, okay, but she's feeding
Speaker 1: me peaches. That's cool. You know that, she like she
Speaker 1: feeds me peaches again because it's like it's a weird
Speaker 1: second peach feeding situation and uh, and then we and
Speaker 1: then she's like, listen, I know they're just a thing,
Speaker 1: and she like leaves and plays Captain Beefheart. Okay, I
Speaker 1: am very freaked out. I'm glad you're still alive. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so Meaty Peaches beef Hearts playing, which is the weirdest.
Speaker 1: Another great song to hear when your butt is on fire.
Speaker 1: Your butt was on fire. It was it was kind
Speaker 1: of like in pain and I was kind of like
Speaker 1: stuck one finger up there, right, yeah, but it was gentle,
Speaker 1: she was. It was she was doing a lot of
Speaker 1: a lot of tricks in there. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: don't know if something or if you had an allergic
Speaker 1: reaction to the late text, maybe maybe, but passing out
Speaker 1: is not it rearranged by Chakras. And then the beef
Speaker 1: Heart was And then I was like, what is beef
Speaker 1: Heart doing. This is not a calming song right now,
Speaker 1: there's a time signature. It's looking weird. And I was
Speaker 1: just like, okay, eat the peaches, focus on the beaches,
Speaker 1: focus on the beaches. And then thirty minutes later it
Speaker 1: was all good. We kind of like, I kind of
Speaker 1: sat back down the bed. We talked about you know,
Speaker 1: her work, she's like a painter, and it was kinding okay,
Speaker 1: And I had some more peaches, Wow, a lot of peaches.
Speaker 1: And then I put my finger up her. But yeah,
Speaker 1: did you put a finger condom on? Yeah, that's a
Speaker 1: good idea. I never even thought of that. I milked
Speaker 1: a man's prostate my finger com condom on, which is
Speaker 1: better because then you might you might rub your eye
Speaker 1: and in a moment of weakness and he goes fucking
Speaker 1: that that's disgusting. Yeah, but yeah, then then I fingered
Speaker 1: her and it was it was a pleasant even. That
Speaker 1: was a really interesting story about what it's like to
Speaker 1: be a man. Just like you're you're literally fainting, you
Speaker 1: could be drugged, and you're just like still there, you're leaving. Yeah,
Speaker 1: more comedy. How did she how did she find? Yeah?
Speaker 1: And um and she's like, I saw you at Union
Speaker 1: Hall and I'm like, I can't believe Union Hall is
Speaker 1: where you got hot for me, because that's not my
Speaker 1: main spots. I'm not smashing for Union Hall. That's where
Speaker 1: you find someone who's gonna suck you silently. The figure
Speaker 1: condom buyers are all Union Hall Comedy show goes. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. They don't. They don't do
Speaker 1: the early show at New York Comedy Club. That I've
Speaker 1: never even met anyone with a finger condom. That was
Speaker 1: you other things. I mean my first time I saw
Speaker 1: one and the last time my own. Yeah. I mean
Speaker 1: I've seen people use them for like like in like
Speaker 1: secretary work, you know, and you're going to use touch
Speaker 1: a lot of papers. I think there's probably different ones though,
Speaker 1: for but the thing. Wow, we hope you enjoyed that
Speaker 1: excerpt from our interview with stand up comedian who Sama Sidick.
Speaker 1: It is a fucking fantastic interview. And if you want
Speaker 1: to hear the whole thing and whole things from other
Speaker 1: creators like Lena Dunham Rocks and Gay Trevor Noah, Michael Rappaport, etcetera,
Speaker 1: head on over to Luminary podcast dot com. A subscription
Speaker 1: is as little as two dollars and cents a month.