Speaker 1: What's up, guys? What's up friends? What a beautiful day
Speaker 1: in southern California. Gorgeous it is. Bogan Villa is popping everywhere.
Speaker 1: The what is what? The bogan villa? That beautiful, bright
Speaker 1: pink flower you see everywhere, the bogan villa. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: never heard that term before. Nope, Bogan Am I saying
Speaker 1: it right, guys, Bogan Villa. It's beautiful, It's everywhere. It's
Speaker 1: very laws. Desert flowers are the best, which I did
Speaker 1: not know until it came out here. The cactus is
Speaker 1: the best desert flower. Let's keep it one hundred. That
Speaker 1: is a beautiful desert flower to eat in a taco. Yes. Um,
Speaker 1: we laid down the Casey song yesterday. We do Oh man, Donald,
Speaker 1: we really it's amazing. You've heard took it to the
Speaker 1: next level. The finished product from yeaterday's session. I have
Speaker 1: not heard yet. I'll get to you as soon as
Speaker 1: I receive it. But Donald was doing harmonies, and uh,
Speaker 1: it's gonna be amazing. It's gonna be a true work
Speaker 1: of art. Ze beat through in a couple of Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know. She's gonna keep Our friend Jessica Weiss,
Speaker 1: who's a blowing up composer. She composed the new Cinderella
Speaker 1: movie with Camilla Cabello that's coming out, and she na,
Speaker 1: when you come me sin Yati, Yeah, yeah, that's her
Speaker 1: and she's um, she's um so talented, Jessica Weiss, and
Speaker 1: so I was like, she's so busy. But I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, we got other fancy people. So I asked
Speaker 1: her to help. I had sort of come up with
Speaker 1: the melody and the words. I was the what is that?
Speaker 1: I was the songwriter if you will okay? And and
Speaker 1: then I brought it to the producer who turned it
Speaker 1: into something of a bop. One am I in this situation,
Speaker 1: just the art you're the artist. You're like, you know,
Speaker 1: you're the pop artist who came in with their talents,
Speaker 1: their their voice, their personality, their charm and brought it
Speaker 1: to life. Right. I think most people in the world,
Speaker 1: in the real world, don't they assume that that these
Speaker 1: pop artists wrote the song they sing? Speaking of pop artists, yeah,
Speaker 1: are you listening to K pop at all? I don't
Speaker 1: listen to any K pop? Please don't know what the
Speaker 1: name of that bend that's the How does K pop any?
Speaker 1: Oh my god? That them boys been getting me every time,
Speaker 1: every time, every time, so I'll be I'll be like,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna like it this time, this time, I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna like it, and then it comes on a
Speaker 1: by the end of it, I'm like smooth like butter
Speaker 1: so good it is. Yeah, I have never I don't
Speaker 1: think I've ever heard a BTS That one's my favorite.
Speaker 1: I've heard that one. I've heard that that Dynamite song.
Speaker 1: That one gets me every time a robot algorithm figured
Speaker 1: out exactly what you want to hear. Is this theory
Speaker 1: or I mean, is this conspiracy theory or is this No,
Speaker 1: I'm just saying, like, you know, uh, there's there's a formula,
Speaker 1: not that it always works, but there is like a
Speaker 1: computer formula of writing a hooky pop song, right sure.
Speaker 1: I mean there's definitely you know, there's standpson and you know,
Speaker 1: tried in true practices that make a pop hit. But
Speaker 1: the talent of that group is is definitely unrivaled at
Speaker 1: the moment. They're all really super talented. Okay, it's a
Speaker 1: it's a super group. Dynamite that night. Well, Donald was
Speaker 1: laying down the tracks yesterday and I really felt like
Speaker 1: Puffy I was in the back of her studio on
Speaker 1: the couch. I had my hands like this, like thinking
Speaker 1: and rubbing my chin and um. When he was a
Speaker 1: little bit pitch she I would turn to her and
Speaker 1: give her the look like I need auto tune on
Speaker 1: that one. And then you and then you were like,
Speaker 1: all right, let me get on the track. Then I
Speaker 1: want yeah, And just like a normal producer, I was like,
Speaker 1: how can I be on the track? Should I say?
Speaker 1: Should I say another one? That's very puffy of you.
Speaker 1: That's I'm gonna make sure she at least puts in
Speaker 1: one of my ahead. I want her to put in
Speaker 1: a that's right, That's right. It's really good though. And Casey.
Speaker 1: It's about Casey. So Casey was just bopping her head there.
Speaker 1: She was feeling it. It would have been really really
Speaker 1: forgot one. We should have did another one, another one,
Speaker 1: another one. Yeah. Anyway, so I'm excited to share that
Speaker 1: track with you. I can tell you. The funniest thing
Speaker 1: that happened to me told I told Donald, But Donald,
Speaker 1: you have to hear it again. Oh boy, Donald's making
Speaker 1: a face. What happened? I'm not making a face. It's
Speaker 1: just you know, I met Lee hold on, hold on,
Speaker 1: let me finish before you go into it like, this
Speaker 1: doesn't happen to me. I meet these people and they're like, hey,
Speaker 1: how's it going, man? But you guy coming next. This
Speaker 1: is what happened, which was Zach Well I met. I
Speaker 1: was at a restaurant and the meter d of the
Speaker 1: restaurant introduced me to Lee Daniels. Yeah. So for those
Speaker 1: of you don't know, very very successful filmmaker who you know,
Speaker 1: started I think with precious right, and then he meane, uh,
Speaker 1: what did he do? Um the Billy Holliday movie, The Butler,
Speaker 1: the Paperboy, Empire, um, Lee Daniel Lee Daniel Daniels is
Speaker 1: a force of nature due in Hollywood. He found a
Speaker 1: way to make the movies he wants to make and
Speaker 1: how he wants to make it. Man, and it's you know,
Speaker 1: he's also a very funny human being when you hang out.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, he created Empire. He created Empire and uh, anyway,
Speaker 1: he's very very, very big deal in Hollywood and a
Speaker 1: super talented guy. And I met him briefly just probably
Speaker 1: the cocktail party once before. So I shook you know,
Speaker 1: I was sitting at a table and made her He said, oh, Zach,
Speaker 1: have you met Lee Daniels? And I turned around and
Speaker 1: we both kind of smiled each other. I shook his
Speaker 1: hand and said, oh, yeah, we briefly before. Nice to
Speaker 1: see you. Nice to see you, you know, standard restaurants,
Speaker 1: small talk. And Lee Daniels says, oh, hey, have you
Speaker 1: ever met Debbie Allen? Oh? No, So I turned I
Speaker 1: turned further around to see that he seated with Debbie Allen.
Speaker 1: And now I stand up because I'm like, I have
Speaker 1: to stand up for you out of respect, because you're
Speaker 1: a living legend. And she laughed. She was like, oh,
Speaker 1: you're so sweet. You're so sweet. I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: such a fan. I was like, I quote you and
Speaker 1: she goes, no, you do not, and they go, oh, yes,
Speaker 1: I do. And they're all staring at me at the table,
Speaker 1: and now, mind you, I'm standing now beside the table
Speaker 1: and they're all seated, and I can't help myself, you wan't.
Speaker 1: They all start laughing, right, but I'm but I'm not
Speaker 1: letting their laughter thrown. And she's like cracking up and
Speaker 1: she's like, oh, no, you do. You are not about
Speaker 1: to do this, and I'm like, you want fame, Well,
Speaker 1: fame costs and I wasn't phoning it in. I was
Speaker 1: giving it. And then I go, I told Donald that
Speaker 1: there was like I remembering the scene in Fame. She's
Speaker 1: holding a stick. I was looking for a stick to hold.
Speaker 1: It's like her. It's like her staff in the in
Speaker 1: the dance room. And I'm like, you want fame, Fame costs,
Speaker 1: and right here is where you start paying long pause
Speaker 1: in sweat. Now the table, their table is cracking up.
Speaker 1: It's gone well, and now I think for the cherry
Speaker 1: on top. I turned to Lee Daniels and I go,
Speaker 1: that was my audition for all your future projects. So incredible.
Speaker 1: Feeling myself, I was feeling myself, and I'm so glad
Speaker 1: that I didn't fuck up the monologue because I had
Speaker 1: ready to go. I love it, well done, very well.
Speaker 1: You know. Normally I get really nervous around meaning celebrities
Speaker 1: and and get like and sometimes say something cringey. I
Speaker 1: mean kind of like Donald Dry humping Ryan Reynolds at
Speaker 1: that party. I did, But but but this time, I really
Speaker 1: I think I think I nailed it. I think I
Speaker 1: stuck the landing crush. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Get into
Speaker 1: the show. Scrubs A day of shot five six seven
Speaker 1: eight about show we made about a bunch of dots
Speaker 1: or so yet an here yet very funny episodes, so
Speaker 1: fairly funny My New God, Yes, directed by Victor Nelly.
Speaker 1: This was the episode I was talking about when I
Speaker 1: said I thought that was the episode where we were
Speaker 1: in a church the end of the episode, were in
Speaker 1: a church and Victor Nelly was playing May God Bless
Speaker 1: You in the whole. I had never heard the song before.
Speaker 1: It's called in the Sun by Joseph Arther. May God's
Speaker 1: Love Be with you. Beautiful song. Yes, beautiful, I picture
Speaker 1: you all the sun in the sun, drink and whatever.
Speaker 1: The great song. May God's Love be with you always.
Speaker 1: Great song, great song. So this is what the episode
Speaker 1: that I thought Victor Nellie was. This was his first episode,
Speaker 1: but it turns out it's his second episode. Yes, you
Speaker 1: know it's Victor Nellie because he's always trying to do
Speaker 1: some wacky trick shots that aren't necessarily in the lexicon
Speaker 1: of the show. He did that weird sort of go
Speaker 1: pro overhead shot and when I'm doing my nap walk,
Speaker 1: that was very weird. Yeah, the nap walk. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: heard the nap I mean, I have no memory of
Speaker 1: doing this whole nappalalk joke. But it was funny. I
Speaker 1: mean I laughed pretty hard at the fact that but
Speaker 1: you did the whole you did the whole obstacle course,
Speaker 1: and then the hand comes out of nowhere. That's new.
Speaker 1: And then it turns around and it's the it's the janitor. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's like, help me move. Yeah, the janitor is Um,
Speaker 1: we learned that the janitor is a burglar. I guess
Speaker 1: on the No, he just tricked you into becoming a burglar.
Speaker 1: Oh so he don't. You don't think that he's a
Speaker 1: regular burglar. He just wanted to fuck me over. Yes, God,
Speaker 1: this guy really hates me. It's like, not it's not
Speaker 1: confined to the hospital anymore. He wants to get me arrested. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he tries to get you arrested. Yeah, you know what.
Speaker 1: It used to be confined to the hospital. Um, he
Speaker 1: just he hated me and I was his nemesis at work.
Speaker 1: But now he's bringing me to other people's homes to
Speaker 1: rob them in anticipation to me getting arrested. Yes, that
Speaker 1: is the most maniacal. That is Like, that is ridiculously evil. Like,
Speaker 1: think about that, man, I'd hate this person so much,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna trick them and I'm going to get them
Speaker 1: arrested and thrown in jail. This is a felony. This
Speaker 1: isn't a misdemeanor. This is a felony. You walk out
Speaker 1: of there with a freaking statue a God, Yes, that
Speaker 1: is a felony. That thing is worth more than ten
Speaker 1: thousand dollars. I'm sure of it. I'm sure of it. Well,
Speaker 1: it wasn't just the Buddha we we. He had me
Speaker 1: load up their precious vases. This poor Asian couple comes
Speaker 1: home and I'm robbing them and he's nowhere to be found.
Speaker 1: I've been drinking their their their their Chinese beer at
Speaker 1: the table. And his whole explanation on why he was
Speaker 1: doing it, why he needed to move all of this stuff,
Speaker 1: was because he went to China when he was younger.
Speaker 1: He lived in China for a little bit, explaining why
Speaker 1: he had so many Chinese vases in his house. Right,
Speaker 1: But but his explanation was, like, I traveled to China
Speaker 1: and I you know, I couldn't. I wanted to live
Speaker 1: there so bad, but I couldn't, So I just bought
Speaker 1: a piece of it back with me something like that,
Speaker 1: and it's they're robbing an Asian family. Yeah. I laughed
Speaker 1: so hard at that. And then I steal the boot
Speaker 1: it and I'm being chased by police dogs down the street.
Speaker 1: I don't remember this. I'm being chased by German shepherds
Speaker 1: who clearly didn't invite me, like the rottweiler I recently
Speaker 1: worked with. Um. I laughed a few times when I
Speaker 1: when I m when I'm not invited to the baptism,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, it's family, it's family only everyone.
Speaker 1: That's that's how they're doing it. That's how they're doing it.
Speaker 1: I didn't understand. I laughed at that too, but I
Speaker 1: was like, who the fuck is Jad talking to? Well,
Speaker 1: he's just like nervous energy, and he's so he's so
Speaker 1: worked up that he's not invited to the baptism that
Speaker 1: he's just kind of nervously likes only family everyone, No,
Speaker 1: the only family at this one. But you know what,
Speaker 1: I loved, and then carls like I was invited. I
Speaker 1: love the background reacted to your loudness, though, Did you
Speaker 1: notice that? Yeah, somebody directed them correctly. Yeah, now how
Speaker 1: about when I go when Cox is fucking him, and
Speaker 1: he goes, I want you to be the godfather, and
Speaker 1: I go and then he goes, I am joking because
Speaker 1: I am lying, um, and then I and then I
Speaker 1: like swipe my tear away because I was so moved. Yeah, gosh,
Speaker 1: man JD is obsessed with doctor Cox. He wants him
Speaker 1: to love him, like so badly. He wants his love
Speaker 1: and approval. The crazy thing is he's already gotten it.
Speaker 1: He just wants more now. Now It's like like he's
Speaker 1: already gotten the pat on the back. He's already gotten
Speaker 1: all of those things. He knows that doctor Cox respects
Speaker 1: him at this point. Now he just wants doctor Cox
Speaker 1: to respect him and say, say he respects him, every
Speaker 1: moment he can get it out of him. Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: he's needy. He wants um affirmation, he wants um. He
Speaker 1: wants I don't know, a big brother, a father figure,
Speaker 1: all those things. And but Cox has given him all
Speaker 1: of that already only in short, little like one minute soundbites.
Speaker 1: Jade's like a junkie. He needs more. Yeah, he's a junkie.
Speaker 1: He's a junkie for affirmation keeps coming back. It is um.
Speaker 1: So we learned that Elliott names her her eggs that
Speaker 1: are in her uterus um. Yes, and she said she
Speaker 1: rubs her her stomach and said, Hailey doesn't have a
Speaker 1: chance this month. And then she says, I name my
Speaker 1: I name my eggs. Big frick right. Yeah, Sarah's fucking
Speaker 1: out of her mind in this episode. Yeah doesn't she doesn't.
Speaker 1: Isn't there a line where it's like, oh, man, Haley
Speaker 1: would have been a fast runner or something like that.
Speaker 1: She's like, yeah, she would have. She would have she
Speaker 1: would have been. Yeah, isn't there what is it? What
Speaker 1: is it? If I didn't write it down? But she
Speaker 1: says something about like like, yes, she would have been. Okay,
Speaker 1: Jack grew fast, hold on time out. This is the
Speaker 1: classic sitcom thing. Yeah, would have baby grows faster than
Speaker 1: the freaking show. Yeah, well, you run out of ideas
Speaker 1: of things to do with the baby. So then it's like,
Speaker 1: all right, how about toddler jokes? The kids are toddler now?
Speaker 1: Next thing? You know? The kids sixteen and she has
Speaker 1: only been on for five seasons. That was growing pains.
Speaker 1: Remember the kid like jumped a lot of years that
Speaker 1: that was the most egregious example of that. They were like,
Speaker 1: we got nothing left for a baby. What if the
Speaker 1: kid's four? Now the same thing with family ties. Oh really, dude,
Speaker 1: the little kid in family ties. They they jumped big
Speaker 1: time in family ties. You don't remember that. I don't
Speaker 1: remember that one. Okay, but um, how old you baptize
Speaker 1: a child? Oh that I don't know. Everywhere between like
Speaker 1: baby and two, depending on the family, and how quickly
Speaker 1: they get to the church, how active they are in
Speaker 1: the church. All right, Well, all I know is that
Speaker 1: this child, Donald's right, he he he aged fast. Maybe
Speaker 1: he's got the Benjamin Buttons thing. Okay, that's aging backwards,
Speaker 1: so he's reverse Benjamin button up. He's got reverse Benjamin.
Speaker 1: Cheryl Hines is our guest star. She's very funny, very funny.
Speaker 1: And uh, this was when she was she was on
Speaker 1: a curb at this point, wasn't she Yeah? And then
Speaker 1: i'm she walks in and Jady says, I'm sure you've
Speaker 1: heard about me, and she says I haven't. And then
Speaker 1: I do the same kind of thing. So they don't.
Speaker 1: They don't talk much. Everybody that there's not a lot
Speaker 1: of talking in the family. Yeah, he's just so worked up.
Speaker 1: Bro um, how about laugh going through the lobby going hallelujah,
Speaker 1: A brother's I have some sex. That shit was hilarious.
Speaker 1: His wife throws his wife's throwing her legs up in
Speaker 1: the air because they want to have a boy like Jesus.
Speaker 1: Yea laughed, your ass was like he likes it like that. Yeah, no,
Speaker 1: you go, you go, oh my god, you go smack.
Speaker 1: Then and then I'm spanking your ass because you're about
Speaker 1: to go get laid, And I'm like, this is how
Speaker 1: he likes it. What a fucking bunch of weirdos we are, dude, yeah, dude, yeah,
Speaker 1: they're nuts. Man, I'm not so happy that you're about
Speaker 1: to get laid that I'm giving you sort of what
Speaker 1: seems like a thing we do a celebratory spanking, yes,
Speaker 1: in front of a devout Christian. And then and then
Speaker 1: when you leave, I go, sorry, this is how he
Speaker 1: likes it. Um, they're gonna she keeps her legs up
Speaker 1: in the air because they're trying to have a boy
Speaker 1: like Jesus. So here's a question, then, what are Christians
Speaker 1: allowed to say? Like, there's just so many different versions
Speaker 1: of this out there. It seems like, you know, there's
Speaker 1: some Christians that curse, there's some that don't curse. There
Speaker 1: are some, you know what I mean, just how religious
Speaker 1: you are. I think we're saying that she's a pretty
Speaker 1: religious woman. She must be very religious. Hey, well yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean the plot point is that Cox is an
Speaker 1: atheist and his very religious sister comes to town and
Speaker 1: it's it's it's their sort of battle. You know, I
Speaker 1: think he would have to be an atheist. He called
Speaker 1: religion witchcraft pretty much. I think I think it's pretty
Speaker 1: clear he because of what he sees in the hospital
Speaker 1: and the life he's led, and we learned that he
Speaker 1: has a very very fucked up childhood with an abusive parent.
Speaker 1: So I think he's just got no no faith or
Speaker 1: belief in anything at all. And here's a sister who's
Speaker 1: one hundred and eighty degrees religious, And you know, that's
Speaker 1: sort of one of the themes of the episode is
Speaker 1: is how two siblings, or right, I guess, any two
Speaker 1: people that need to be close, you know, navigate that.
Speaker 1: What's up with Kelso and a gimp? Kelso's son has
Speaker 1: a gimp. Call let's call that a tease and we'll
Speaker 1: be right back after this break. Talk about Kelsa's son
Speaker 1: and Kelsa's sons and we're bad. We are back, We
Speaker 1: are back. Okay, we're Lambda Lambda lambed and oh I
Speaker 1: can't hear that noise now with any ever again without
Speaker 1: thinking of that song, Oh and a little oh me
Speaker 1: lamar um. Okay, So Turk finds Carla on the bed
Speaker 1: and she's got all the books out. I'm sure lots
Speaker 1: of men and women who are trying actively to have
Speaker 1: a baby can relate to this. We have friends that
Speaker 1: are trying, and now you gotta you spend your whole
Speaker 1: life and trying to not have a baby, and now
Speaker 1: you're trying to have a baby, and you gotta get
Speaker 1: the books out, and you gotta get the app. And
Speaker 1: of course they didn't have apps when we made this show,
Speaker 1: but now I know people use an app. But Turks like,
Speaker 1: I need four play. I can't just go. You can't
Speaker 1: just tell me to get on going. That's every come on.
Speaker 1: Sex is great, four play is come on. That's the
Speaker 1: best part. Okay, the teasing, you like, the sort of
Speaker 1: leading up to things, Yeah, that's the come on. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't care if you're trying to make a baby,
Speaker 1: if you're trying not to make a baby, but don't
Speaker 1: take out the way. Don't take away to four play? Yeah,
Speaker 1: don't take away to four play? Tyra Banks just saying
Speaker 1: Tyra Banks, naming enough for a play. Well in the show,
Speaker 1: she says Tyra Banks, and you do the funniest thing.
Speaker 1: You go you like make a moan and your pulvis
Speaker 1: just goes forward as though you are humping a ghost
Speaker 1: version of tire Bank. Yeah, the tire Banks Tanks were beautiful,
Speaker 1: a beautiful woman. You can fight it in for the
Speaker 1: writing of this. And did they say Donalds? Who would
Speaker 1: do it for you? When you answered Tyra Banks? Tyra
Speaker 1: Banks is a very beautiful woman. But if I had
Speaker 1: to choose between four play and somebody saying Tyra Banks
Speaker 1: his name, I will choose four plays. Okay, but I'm
Speaker 1: saying now, and I'm sure Casey will be fine that
Speaker 1: you answer this. If you did have to have a
Speaker 1: name said that would get you instantly in the mood,
Speaker 1: who would it be? I don't know. It could be
Speaker 1: someone from your childhood, like you know, young Cathy Ireland.
Speaker 1: M Okay, that's a deep cut Daniel. That isn't good.
Speaker 1: H Ireland was on my was on my puberty list
Speaker 1: of things are happening to me. If we're going back,
Speaker 1: we'll go back that far. No, I'm saying you can
Speaker 1: name whoever whomever you want. But I'm saying, if not
Speaker 1: tire Banks, what would be your name that would make
Speaker 1: you go and push your belts for I don't want
Speaker 1: to answer. You don't have to answer, all right, We'll
Speaker 1: just have to imagine you listener, and both listeners, both
Speaker 1: male and female, can answer in your head right now
Speaker 1: who that would be for you? Joel closed her eyes
Speaker 1: and has turned up to the sky like a j
Speaker 1: D imagination j J Joel, is there someone for you that? Yeah, Joel,
Speaker 1: do you want to share? You get it in my head?
Speaker 1: And it was beautiful? That was oh man, oh man. Okay,
Speaker 1: So what's up with this whole pie talk thing? Okay?
Speaker 1: So JD apparently takes an improv class. That's JD is
Speaker 1: apparently in an improv class that meets in the back
Speaker 1: of a pie shot and so he's used to looking
Speaker 1: around the space for inspiration for his improvs and they're
Speaker 1: all pie pi based improvs. Oh, it's pretty funny though, man,
Speaker 1: Yeah it is. Y I try and for the family
Speaker 1: to a whole improv of of of of watching Cheryl
Speaker 1: Hines and Johnny c fight and it's all about pie.
Speaker 1: And it ends with you're a pie racist, You're a
Speaker 1: cobbler whore. I mean, while I'm yelling this in the
Speaker 1: in the ICU room of their dying loved one, get
Speaker 1: off pie. Yes, yes, come on, get off pie. And
Speaker 1: then later we call it back with the Buddha and Jesus.
Speaker 1: I'm doing for the priests. Oh my god, that was
Speaker 1: really really in front of the priest. I'm doing my
Speaker 1: pie improvs. Yes, here's where the bullshit comes in. No,
Speaker 1: go ahead, Turk doesn't want to have sex anymore. That's
Speaker 1: where the bullshit comes in. Well, he doesn't like this,
Speaker 1: and I'm sure a lot of men can relate. But
Speaker 1: when it's just let me finish the thought and then
Speaker 1: you can say bullshit when you're when you're getting into
Speaker 1: the No, now, we're having sex like this just to
Speaker 1: try and make a baby. Come on, the time is right,
Speaker 1: I'm mobulating legs up in the air. I'm going to
Speaker 1: stay here and holding the the semen. You know, and
Speaker 1: if it's like a program like that, I bet a
Speaker 1: lot of men are like, come on, we've lost the romance.
Speaker 1: We've lost the sexiness of this. Isn't that a thing? Bullshit? Okay,
Speaker 1: you're the only person here who's actively had children. So
Speaker 1: the best part of the best listen, that is the
Speaker 1: best part making the baby. There is no I mean,
Speaker 1: I guess back in a day there wasn't science behind it,
Speaker 1: or there's just it looks like it's a bunch of myth.
Speaker 1: But she's reading books on how to get a boy
Speaker 1: with her legs up in the air and everything like that.
Speaker 1: I don't think there's anything that can con control what egg. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: but but there are there are technical things when you're
Speaker 1: really trying you do right, Like the woman doesn't run
Speaker 1: up afterwards and go pee. She like lies there with
Speaker 1: her legs up in the air and and tries to
Speaker 1: jiggle or butt. So the sperms is like excited to
Speaker 1: get to the egg. We've all seen the Big Lebowski,
Speaker 1: Yeah or election you remember, film me up, fill me
Speaker 1: up the sign. But I'm saying the science doesn't mean
Speaker 1: that it has to be in missionary all the time
Speaker 1: now anymore. So I'm saying trying to say, Joel, can
Speaker 1: you google the best you can get pregnant doggie style,
Speaker 1: you can get pregnant. No, I know, but I'm saying
Speaker 1: if you're someone would say it's not happening quickly, and
Speaker 1: you and your partner are really trying like you're gonna
Speaker 1: do it by the book you got the app saying
Speaker 1: I'm elating, honey, this is the right exact time that
Speaker 1: we have the best shot of trying. I don't think
Speaker 1: doggie style is probably best, but Joell will how do
Speaker 1: you know this? I'm guessing because in the movies, all
Speaker 1: my kids to doggie style babies. Oh wow, you guys
Speaker 1: thought this podcast wouldn't teach new information. I don't know
Speaker 1: if that's I would like to have a t shirt
Speaker 1: that says, all my kids are doggy style babies. Donald,
Speaker 1: I don't know if I don't know if that's true
Speaker 1: or not. I just said it because I know, but
Speaker 1: it's funny. Do well? Can we have that put on
Speaker 1: a baby onesie? Um? All my for the kids? All
Speaker 1: my kids are doggy styles that'll sell like hotcakes. That
Speaker 1: will sell like hotcakes. Willis agree? Oh my babies? All right?
Speaker 1: Well too? Well? Will you just google for us? Um
Speaker 1: answer here for you? All right? L. A. Kinsburg, PhD.
Speaker 1: Chief of the Division of Behavioral Medicine at University Hospitals
Speaker 1: Case Medical Center, says it's very difficult to research specific
Speaker 1: sexual positions that might enhance fertility, and essentially there's not
Speaker 1: really a lot of specific science on it. But her
Speaker 1: number one suggestion is missionary. Number two is doggy. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: bam bam, I just think mission will. You also have
Speaker 1: a lot of length and girth, so you might be
Speaker 1: you might be getting closer to the egg than others.
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, I think Joel, it's just physics. If
Speaker 1: he's able to reach in there further with his science.
Speaker 1: If someone has a small tenus, the spermam further to travel.
Speaker 1: It's fast. That's why it's a little bit harder. Yeah,
Speaker 1: to have babies. Yes, because the sperm gets out of
Speaker 1: the small penis. Is like, where the fuck do we go?
Speaker 1: I don't know Where's Donald's just hand delivering the sperm.
Speaker 1: You know how they have like white glove delivery for furniture.
Speaker 1: Donald's giving that sperm white glove delivery. Oh my, I
Speaker 1: love that. Okay. So Turk realizes that he's not gonna
Speaker 1: have four play before sex. So he realizes that angry
Speaker 1: sex is a lot of fun kissing her off. Have
Speaker 1: you ever had angry sex? Um, I'm sure I don't
Speaker 1: remember a specific example, but is that your thing? Do
Speaker 1: you do that? I don't, I don't. I disagree with
Speaker 1: angry sex being awesome. Well, you're saying horrible things to Carla.
Speaker 1: I mean, I just don't think that would work. I
Speaker 1: think she'd be like, fuck you, dick, go in the
Speaker 1: other room. No, because she wants to have a baby.
Speaker 1: No she won't. She but you're saying no, No, you're
Speaker 1: saying all you said you tell her to brush her
Speaker 1: hair with a rake or something shit like that. Listen,
Speaker 1: she said she needs a rake to brush her hair. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but she wants a baby, and she's stuck with me,
Speaker 1: so she has to have sex with me. And so
Speaker 1: now she's angry and having sex with me. But in
Speaker 1: the real world, your wife would turn you like, what
Speaker 1: the fuck did you just say? Anybody you want to
Speaker 1: have a baby? Right? Um? Okay, So then we learn
Speaker 1: that um Elliott does not use the word penis or vagina. Um.
Speaker 1: She has three options for penis, swing schwan, swing schwan.
Speaker 1: Is it swing shuan or swing schwan? I thought it
Speaker 1: was swing schwan, okay, swing schwan, peepers or peep and
Speaker 1: then a vagina is bajingo or jingo, and then you
Speaker 1: mentioned which is just ridiculous because she's a doctor, And
Speaker 1: then you mentioned the cervical mucus and she goes, from
Speaker 1: now on, we'll be calling that ikey sticky, which is
Speaker 1: what they called marijuana. Something that's sticky, icky ikey. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I laughed so hard at this. I just
Speaker 1: love that Elliott is a doctor and she can't talk
Speaker 1: about genitalia. She calls the swing a penis a swing
Speaker 1: swan swing swong andoo hoo. But jango is a good
Speaker 1: one too, and yeah, yeah, the jingoes great. I also
Speaker 1: laughed at We kind of jumped over this a little bit.
Speaker 1: But how the janitor tells the audience he's gonna get
Speaker 1: j j D's gonna be robbing somebody by giving him
Speaker 1: the hat and the gloves before the Asian people come in. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Jad's got the hat and then he leaves. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: Jady smiling like in thought at the table, just thinking,
Speaker 1: oh my god, Now what about what earlier armies skipped
Speaker 1: this too? When we played Koyana SCOTTSI the Philip Glass track. Um,
Speaker 1: when the janitors staring me down? You remember that? Yes?
Speaker 1: What's that from Daniel? Do you know? Kayonna Scotts. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a film. Wait is that your is that? We're
Speaker 1: asking like what the film is? Well, there's a organ
Speaker 1: and then this like deep chance, Yeah, it's from the
Speaker 1: it's is it not from the film? I'm assuming it is.
Speaker 1: I didn't know. Did Philip Glass score that film? I
Speaker 1: never saw the film. It's it's a it's a banger
Speaker 1: of the film. Who is it? Is it Lucas by
Speaker 1: hip Music? Yeah? Philip Glass the music I was doing
Speaker 1: Indiana Jones in the Temple of Do No. This is
Speaker 1: yeah exactly, and it's like you know Organs and and
Speaker 1: then the Channe line in slow motion and there's a
Speaker 1: funny moment where he gets blocked and he's like, guys,
Speaker 1: can you can you please move out of the way.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to give him the evil eye and sure,
Speaker 1: and then it comes right back. Oh yeah, Um, we
Speaker 1: learned that my prison name is Gizmo. Probably I missed this.
Speaker 1: How did I miss all of this? There were just
Speaker 1: a lot of jokes. There are a lot of jokes
Speaker 1: in there, a lot of jokes packed in um. Now
Speaker 1: not to mention um. The giant bear shaking Elliot. That
Speaker 1: made me laugh harder than anything in the episode. That's screaming.
Speaker 1: Them screaming like that, and the bear shaking the car
Speaker 1: made I want you all to know that that is
Speaker 1: not green scream. They brought a fucking giant grizzly bear
Speaker 1: to that parking lot and the bear shook that car
Speaker 1: with Elliott inside. I laughed so hard because that would
Speaker 1: be me. There's nothing else, there's nothing else to do
Speaker 1: in that situation but scream. This is Bill went into
Speaker 1: a phase here where there was animal jokes in every episode.
Speaker 1: You're gonna start seeing them come up this season. A lot.
Speaker 1: There's always any animal joke, and and this is starting
Speaker 1: to happen. As you see that, I think everyone just
Speaker 1: was like, well, it was fun to All we have
Speaker 1: to do is write an animal joke and then we
Speaker 1: get cool animals, Like just put a grizzly bear in
Speaker 1: a fat flashback and there'll be a fucking grizzly bear
Speaker 1: here on Tuesday. What about ostyges that we're Donald's can go, Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's write that in When she does that basketball trick
Speaker 1: shot at the end that was clearly you know, like
Speaker 1: the clearly someone was off frame catching it and putting
Speaker 1: it back. You believe that absolutely, Cheryl Hines isn't throwing
Speaker 1: a ball behind her head and hitting it. Also, watch
Speaker 1: the ball goes out of frame. Yeah, it does go
Speaker 1: out of frame, but I mean it was seamless. But
Speaker 1: I would say that seems harder to do. Throw the
Speaker 1: ball off screen, somebody catch it above the rim. No, no,
Speaker 1: you need two people. No, no, I disagree. You need
Speaker 1: two people right above the backboard and one's catching her
Speaker 1: ball and one simultaneously letting their ball go. Okay, I
Speaker 1: think that's the way it was done. There's no way,
Speaker 1: charl Hins. There's no ladder behind the backboard or anything
Speaker 1: like that, or the craner or roof. Trust me, there's
Speaker 1: no shot from the roof. It seems a bit harder
Speaker 1: than No. I'm saying, they're literally above the backboard, like
Speaker 1: a foot above, two feet above the rim. To be
Speaker 1: surprised how easy it is to miss anyway. Okay, this
Speaker 1: one thing made me laugh at the end of the show.
Speaker 1: What what the fuck is JD doing at the ramp
Speaker 1: watching Cox and his sister make amend like it pants
Speaker 1: to j D and he's sitting there at the ramp.
Speaker 1: Someone's got to sum up the end of the episode
Speaker 1: of what we all learn. Who the hell is going
Speaker 1: to sum up the episode? Yeah, I think this is
Speaker 1: the first time you were like actually witnessing the the
Speaker 1: reconciliation between the two siblings. But you're like, right there,
Speaker 1: No one else is in the parking lot at all,
Speaker 1: the emergency entrance except for you, the at the bottom
Speaker 1: of the ram staring at them with the with the
Speaker 1: whiskful grin. Listen this. You need a vl You need
Speaker 1: someone there. You need someone there to give a nice
Speaker 1: heartfelt end of episode VL. Um. All right, so we
Speaker 1: have a caller, guys. Um, we're gonna take a break
Speaker 1: right back with the best guest you've ever heard, and
Speaker 1: we're back back. Do or do not? There is no try?
Speaker 1: All right words um, Yes, bring in the Jews. We
Speaker 1: got a call, you know, like a botta smoke maybe
Speaker 1: talking about the episode. So come on, let's get the show.
Speaker 1: Julie and Julian, welcome to the program. How are you, sir?
Speaker 1: Thank you, how are you. We're very excited you're here.
Speaker 1: It's a beautiful day. In southern California. Where are you located?
Speaker 1: I am in Garden Grove, California. Where is where is it?
Speaker 1: I'm right by Huntington Beach, Orange County. Got right by
Speaker 1: Knotsbury Farm, not too far. Okay, I've been to Knotsbury Farm.
Speaker 1: They made great biscuits. They got those biscuit packs and
Speaker 1: the jelly Dont you don't ever mentioned Knotsbury Farm because
Speaker 1: you're so loyal to Disneyland. Have you ever been to
Speaker 1: I have been to Knotsbury Farm several times, and you
Speaker 1: can buy scary coasters. Yeah, they have some great roller
Speaker 1: coasters at Knotsbury Farm. Julian, do you go to Knotsbury Farm?
Speaker 1: I've actually never been. What are you not much of
Speaker 1: a coaster guy? Uh? Not really. I guess my older
Speaker 1: brother scar the crap out me when I was younger,
Speaker 1: so it kind of rude for me. How did he
Speaker 1: scare the crap for you that made it so that
Speaker 1: you didn't want to get on a roller coaster again?
Speaker 1: Basically like I would die? He told you you were
Speaker 1: gonna die on a roller coaster? Basically just freaked me out.
Speaker 1: With any story they could or it would go off
Speaker 1: the rails or something or something just beyond. So I
Speaker 1: just never went on roller coasters. So you've never been
Speaker 1: on a roller coaster, especially the giant ones you have
Speaker 1: like six Flags kind that are like the Hulk where
Speaker 1: you're just like standing up and I hate that. So
Speaker 1: you've never you've never been on a roller coaster before.
Speaker 1: It's what you're saying. I have not. Wow. Wow, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna glad you an easy one like I go on
Speaker 1: ones that go fast but not make me nauseous. Can
Speaker 1: you do? Can you do Space Mountain at Disneyland Tech? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've done it. It's just I've done it a bunch
Speaker 1: of times. I just don't. I don't ever feel better
Speaker 1: coming out than when I went in. Like everyone else
Speaker 1: that's coming out going, oh my god, that's good, let's
Speaker 1: go again. I'm like, oh yeah, I'm gonna feel nauseous
Speaker 1: probably for forty five minutes. And why did I do that?
Speaker 1: I have to be quite honest, and I know this
Speaker 1: is gonna be seck just for all of you, but
Speaker 1: I've never been to Disneyland. I'm just You're just a
Speaker 1: sad human being. Julian. I'm excited for you. It's fun.
Speaker 1: Well the thing is okay, it doesn't really count. But
Speaker 1: I went when I was three, but I don't really
Speaker 1: remember it at all. Yeah, listen, I'm gonna I will
Speaker 1: say this. I will say this. Go ahead. There's nothing
Speaker 1: wrong with never going to Disneyland. There's nothing wrong with
Speaker 1: never getting on a on a roller coaster. Ride ahead.
Speaker 1: There is something wrong with not having fun. Julian, Yeah, okay, Julian.
Speaker 1: What do you do? What do you do for fun? Yeah, Julian,
Speaker 1: what what favorite thing doing? Especially during pandemic? I play
Speaker 1: like guitar bass. Three D prints just kind of stay indoors.
Speaker 1: Do you three D print? What kind of stuff do
Speaker 1: you make? Um? Right now, I'm messing with the printers
Speaker 1: actually printing helmets and I printed a Mandalorian helmet that
Speaker 1: was my very like first prince wow, um, very good.
Speaker 1: But it was a good test brand. So when you
Speaker 1: get it off the web, that and then you can
Speaker 1: hit like print and your thing will make it, or
Speaker 1: you design the helmet yourself. Uh no, I'm actually plant
Speaker 1: on tickets and forces to design. But it's just like
Speaker 1: a like a download this and print it. And there
Speaker 1: is a very friendly community as far as like sharing
Speaker 1: original designs and mock ups. Goes right, what's a good
Speaker 1: three D print? Like, what's a good brand? Because I
Speaker 1: want to I want to print Donald a Mandalorian helmet.
Speaker 1: A good brand? Um, a good starter? One is uh
Speaker 1: is an end or? Three? Is what I'm using? Right?
Speaker 1: Endoor three? Okay? Endor Or? In Star Wars Donald Endoor. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's the forest moon of the planet Indoor, the forest Moon.
Speaker 1: So Indoor is actually not the actual planet that they're on.
Speaker 1: They're on the forest Moon of Indoor. So Endoor is
Speaker 1: a planet. Do we ever go to Endoor in the show? No,
Speaker 1: but we are on the forest moon. Stop saying forest moon.
Speaker 1: But that's how they say it in the movie. I know.
Speaker 1: I just think that it's too bad that Endoor doesn't
Speaker 1: get a troop. We'll put a garrison. What what did
Speaker 1: they say, Joel, We'll send a crack team to the
Speaker 1: forest Moon of Endoor. Is that Adam lac Bar? That
Speaker 1: Zach Barr? That was Zach Barr? Impressed General Nadine. I
Speaker 1: like ac Bar. I always thought he was cool. That's
Speaker 1: a trap yeah all the time. All right, sorry, Julian,
Speaker 1: we're back to you. Do you have a question for
Speaker 1: you can't handle firepower of that magnitude. Donald. Listen, Julian's
Speaker 1: going to ask a question. Well, first I want to
Speaker 1: say that I'm sorry for my camera. I'm kind of
Speaker 1: dark here, not just camera, myself too and dark man. Well,
Speaker 1: we all upgraded our cameras, except Donald's decided to steal
Speaker 1: the one iHeart gave him and use it for animation.
Speaker 1: So Donald is still back to his shitty camera. When
Speaker 1: you're gonna rectify that, I will rectify it soon, yeah,
Speaker 1: because one day we'll put this on YouTube and you're
Speaker 1: gonna look grainy and only me and Daniel are gonna
Speaker 1: look high death. Yeah, but it took Daniel a while
Speaker 1: to get that camera right and your camera all right.
Speaker 1: I just think it's funny that I Heart gave us
Speaker 1: fancy cameras, so in case we ever want to put
Speaker 1: this show on YouTube and you stole it and use
Speaker 1: it for animation, it's a great camera. It is a
Speaker 1: great camera. You're right, but it's meant for the fucking podcast.
Speaker 1: Four K dude, Okay, he's still using it, yeah, um, gradually.
Speaker 1: But un first off, Unceley, thank you for having me
Speaker 1: on the podcast. I'm super excited. And very nervous. Don't
Speaker 1: pretend no one's listening to us. I am. I'm still
Speaker 1: very nervous. Even the people in stod are listening ahead.
Speaker 1: We're huge and stad silent g donal um, but yeah,
Speaker 1: starts with the G right down. Yes it's I thought
Speaker 1: you were a fucking encyclopedia guys. Oh it is. Wow,
Speaker 1: it is just tad silent donald. So it's really pronounced y. No,
Speaker 1: we just said it silent as sont you dare call
Speaker 1: me twat gears? All right, Julian, I'm glad I didn't.
Speaker 1: I'm glad I didn't. I'm not you, Julie. I don't
Speaker 1: think you would call me twenty years Why wouldn't this
Speaker 1: guy does? Um? Well, okay, so I guess the reason
Speaker 1: I'm here is a couple of weeks ago since to
Speaker 1: listen to you guys on the podcast obviously, and you
Speaker 1: had mentioned about how you want to hear a story
Speaker 1: of I guess a couple of breaking up and then
Speaker 1: getting back together and kind of saying where that's at.
Speaker 1: So basically I met my wife or thirteen, and we
Speaker 1: were friends throughout middle school, high school, whatever it might be.
Speaker 1: And after high school we stopped talking for a while,
Speaker 1: and I found out that she was getting into trouble.
Speaker 1: When you saying she was getting into trouble, like she
Speaker 1: was doing drive bys and shit like that, or no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I grew up in Hyton Beach, There's there's no drive bys. Really,
Speaker 1: what do you mean drugs? What do you mean? Drugs?
Speaker 1: Mainly um and just getting into that kind of trouble,
Speaker 1: that kind of lifestyle, and and so I kind of
Speaker 1: got a rout of it, I guess. And so we
Speaker 1: started dating for a little while, and I mean, it
Speaker 1: was the best time that I had in Unfortunately it's
Speaker 1: for a short lived time because she ended up moving
Speaker 1: to Michigan, where her biological father lives. So we dated
Speaker 1: up until the point she had to leave, which was
Speaker 1: an amazing three months. Time passed and we had other
Speaker 1: relationships and one day in twenty sixteen, I accidentally butt
Speaker 1: dialed her. Well, I was trying to text her and
Speaker 1: I hit the call button. I hung up, like I
Speaker 1: don't even know what to say to her. Her voice
Speaker 1: so long, So she ended up calling it back and
Speaker 1: we did not stop talking for the next eight hours.
Speaker 1: And it was at like nine o'clock at night. Wow.
Speaker 1: We talked and we talked and I was like, screw this,
Speaker 1: like it's been six years and I'm gonna go see her.
Speaker 1: So I booked the flight. Wait, did were you like?
Speaker 1: What did you say that to her? Were you like,
Speaker 1: you know, we've been talking all night. I think the
Speaker 1: next step is just for me to come and I'm
Speaker 1: going to go I'm going to see you. And she
Speaker 1: was like, all right now, not at all. Uh, it
Speaker 1: was it was it was just me really. I didn't
Speaker 1: want to seem too pushy, but she was very happy
Speaker 1: with the idea. When I finally told her maybe about
Speaker 1: a week or two later, and so I booked the flight.
Speaker 1: We hit a great time and we started to I
Speaker 1: guess we started to date again when I went to
Speaker 1: visit her, and we knew how that ended before, as
Speaker 1: long as it's not at all, so again I said
Speaker 1: fuck it. Uh to Forty days later, I packed all
Speaker 1: my ship and moved to Michigan. Oh my god, Wow,
Speaker 1: you were in love, my friend. You were love? Yeah,
Speaker 1: And so I went from me, you went from the
Speaker 1: beach to Michigan. Yeah, for love finds out it's cold,
Speaker 1: um yeah um but uh so yeah, So I went
Speaker 1: and and I rented a van because I my car
Speaker 1: was a piece of crap, and I took my dog
Speaker 1: and went to Michigan on a whim. We were there
Speaker 1: about me, oh yeah, oh no, yeah, I moved here here,
Speaker 1: I am no, no, I gave up everything. So she
Speaker 1: wanted you to move there and you did? Yeah? Uh so,
Speaker 1: um so what happens? Did we stay in Michigan another
Speaker 1: six months? And she's like, I don't want to do
Speaker 1: another Michigan winter. Let's get out of here. So she's
Speaker 1: from here, and so it wasn't too hard called the
Speaker 1: make really, so we moved back. So I moved all
Speaker 1: my crap and my dog and my girlfriend all the
Speaker 1: same time. Or six months later back to California. Wow,
Speaker 1: same van. No, no, we bought a car while we
Speaker 1: were out there, the same van. No. Great. Actually, now
Speaker 1: she you're doing a lot of things for this woman.
Speaker 1: I hope that she is appreciative of of of all
Speaker 1: the life changes you're making. For one thing, I didn't
Speaker 1: tell you, and it sounds crazy, I bought an engagement
Speaker 1: ring way before I moved to Michigan or to back
Speaker 1: to California. I'm sorry, before I moved to Michigan. I
Speaker 1: had bought an engagement ring, prepared to ask her to
Speaker 1: marry me at some point, and you'd chickened out the
Speaker 1: whole time you were there, dude. Huh oh you asked,
Speaker 1: did you ask her while you were in Michigan? I did.
Speaker 1: I got the engaged ring, moved to Michigan, and uh
Speaker 1: asked her to get married. And then we ended up
Speaker 1: moving back to California, all our families so not back
Speaker 1: to California. Um. Nine months later we got married. So
Speaker 1: and uh now we have a beautiful two year old boy.
Speaker 1: Um and uh yeah, I mean that's that's that's my
Speaker 1: story of of I did the craziest thing I've ever
Speaker 1: done in my life and going back to saying that's
Speaker 1: she's done anything great for me. She gave me a
Speaker 1: beautiful to old boy has a happy ending. I was
Speaker 1: worried because sometimes Joel throws at us a really sad ending,
Speaker 1: and this had a beautiful ending. I thought, you're gonna
Speaker 1: be like and then she fucked my best friend and
Speaker 1: I was okay with it, you know, like sometimes Joel
Speaker 1: throws those at up. So I wonder how they're doing.
Speaker 1: I wonder how they're doing. I know, Joel, I want
Speaker 1: to check in on them because I really hope that
Speaker 1: he's had his turn and he can tell us about it.
Speaker 1: Oh please don't follow up with them. But no story,
Speaker 1: I know. But Julian, we love a happy ending, a
Speaker 1: romantic story. And you did you You gave up your
Speaker 1: whole life for love and it panned out. That's beautiful.
Speaker 1: It's one of those things where I grew up a
Speaker 1: romantic and I don't really know the phrase, but there
Speaker 1: was all I watched a lot of those movies where
Speaker 1: it's like hopelessness romantic and well there's well it doesn't
Speaker 1: it doesn't always work out. But in your case, you
Speaker 1: really stepped out on a limb. You really, you know yourself.
Speaker 1: You made yourself so vulnerable and and it worked. You know,
Speaker 1: It's it was just scaring I've ever done, of course,
Speaker 1: well until having a child. Yeah, let me know about
Speaker 1: how long were you got How long were you guys
Speaker 1: dating when you decided to ask her to marry you?
Speaker 1: Not long at all? Well, I mean it was like
Speaker 1: six months maybe less than that, eh, but he if that,
Speaker 1: But I mean I've known her since we were twelve,
Speaker 1: and you, guys, I know you guys have been together
Speaker 1: since then too, You got a baby together and everything
Speaker 1: you both to living in California again. That's a wonderful thing, man,
Speaker 1: it really is. I don't know how we can fix
Speaker 1: your life because your life feels like it's is pretty
Speaker 1: darn great. Is there anything you need fixing? There? There
Speaker 1: is a fix my life that does have to do
Speaker 1: with my son. Actually, Okay, Donald, it's time for Garden Grove,
Speaker 1: California's favorite segment. It's time too, fi yo life excited
Speaker 1: for that? Okay, So my parents and my brother watch
Speaker 1: my son while my wife and I are at work,
Speaker 1: and I've actually come to pick up my son. And
Speaker 1: eventually you found out that my brother's teaching my son
Speaker 1: that dresses or for girls and blue with for boys
Speaker 1: and all this macho masculine bullshit that I don't want
Speaker 1: the toxicity. And my my son adores my brother, and honestly,
Speaker 1: I don't really want him around him, just because he
Speaker 1: he's this anti progressive, honestly very homophobic, and it tears
Speaker 1: me to bit. It's just the shreds that um. But
Speaker 1: this is happening, and I have nowhere else to go.
Speaker 1: I have nowhere to I don't like, we can't afford
Speaker 1: daycare and I live in California. Have you spoken to
Speaker 1: your brother and said, hey, you know, you know, we
Speaker 1: love you and everything, but we don't want you programming
Speaker 1: or a child with these beliefs. We actually had a
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say discussion. We definitely fought. Um. We went
Speaker 1: off on each other about it, and uh, it's it's
Speaker 1: just one of those things where he's he thinks he's
Speaker 1: rights and his generation was right and this and that
Speaker 1: blah blah blah, and just I don't I don't know
Speaker 1: what to do. Well, you're a bit tangled because you
Speaker 1: need to help with healthcare and you can't afford healthcare.
Speaker 1: That's not your brother. Um, how old is the child
Speaker 1: used too? Okay, well he's a little young probably to
Speaker 1: be processing um any of right, yeah, right, but but
Speaker 1: I've already heard him come home. My son will say
Speaker 1: things like boys don't cry. Yeah, and I tell him,
Speaker 1: I who told you that? And obviously everyone denies it,
Speaker 1: but now knowing saying like my son was wore a
Speaker 1: little blanking he said my new dress, and my brother
Speaker 1: corrects him like, no, boys don't wear dresses. And then
Speaker 1: we went off on a tangent about it. I don't
Speaker 1: know what I'm supposed to do. That's really tricky because
Speaker 1: you're if your brother's not respecting your wishes, Um, it's
Speaker 1: really disrespectful from him. But at the same time, you're
Speaker 1: you're a bit stuck because you need the healthcare help.
Speaker 1: Excuse me, you need be a daycare help. What do
Speaker 1: you Joel Daniel Donald any ideas what to help him.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't bring my kid around my brother. That's just
Speaker 1: how I would. That's just how I would handle it.
Speaker 1: And I know it's fucked up for my brother, but
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't want my kids having any type
Speaker 1: of prejudice or yeah, or he's kind of doing it
Speaker 1: to himself, like if I take my son away from
Speaker 1: but that's that's his that you know, it's clear that
Speaker 1: your brother does love your son. Yeah, but you know
Speaker 1: it's not his place to it's not his place to
Speaker 1: to to do that to It's not his place to
Speaker 1: educate your son on with his beliefs, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, It's not his it's not his place to
Speaker 1: do that. So especially when especially when you best, especially
Speaker 1: when you very specifically has said don't do that and
Speaker 1: he's still doing it. Yeah, like that's a that's gonna
Speaker 1: be a note in the words Randy Jackson, that's gonna
Speaker 1: be a note for me, dog like straight up, like
Speaker 1: you gotta, I would not bring my child around that person,
Speaker 1: Daniel Joel any thoughts I think personally, you know, you
Speaker 1: might have to make some sort of like quote unquote
Speaker 1: financial sacrifice in this department to make your point to
Speaker 1: your brother, because right now it's only words until you
Speaker 1: take action, and the action needs to be you will
Speaker 1: not see my child again if you keep talking this way,
Speaker 1: I will remove my child from your life. I will
Speaker 1: remove you from my life if you cannot respect this
Speaker 1: very basic wish to you know, simply be accepting of
Speaker 1: other people and be progressive in the in the in
Speaker 1: the most basic way, you know what I mean, And
Speaker 1: so and and this might mean that until your brother
Speaker 1: comes around, you might have to pay for daycare in
Speaker 1: some fashion. And I know that's tough, and I know
Speaker 1: it's going to be like you know, I don't know
Speaker 1: if it's an extra shift or I don't know if
Speaker 1: it's you know, selling some three D printed Mandalorian helmets
Speaker 1: or whatever it is, like something Yeah, maybe Hey, you
Speaker 1: know what you can do? Do Do you do? Do you
Speaker 1: stream on Twitch? You ever heard of twitch? Maybe you
Speaker 1: should stream some Oh shit, we forgot to stream with
Speaker 1: freaking Dan or the other night. It's okay, I do
Speaker 1: it every day. I do it every day or Wednesday, Friday, Sunday.
Speaker 1: We'll work it. We'll work it out. He's got so
Speaker 1: pissed off you could tell he's so sorry. It's okay,
Speaker 1: it's okay. The way this is jum right now, I
Speaker 1: want to watch. Am I allowed to comment? And will
Speaker 1: you see my coms? Of course? Yes? I supposed to
Speaker 1: make it rain dude. It's okay, it's okay. This is
Speaker 1: about Julian right now. One second, one second, we have
Speaker 1: to rectify this. Yeah, sorry, Dan, it's okay. It's really,
Speaker 1: it's really truly. Get on tonight and take you private Friday.
Speaker 1: Oh boy, take we're gonna make You're gonna take you
Speaker 1: private and make your long story long story. Sure. Are
Speaker 1: we allowed to say things on your Twitch stream like
Speaker 1: show us your butt? Yes? Of course you can say
Speaker 1: whatever you want anyway. Julian, I think you know, unfortunately,
Speaker 1: there might be a little bit of self sacrifice here
Speaker 1: and that if you want to make the point. You
Speaker 1: have to just do it. Do it. It can't be like,
Speaker 1: well we need this, it's like, yeah, you need it,
Speaker 1: you need to get it from somewhere else. Yeahl's right.
Speaker 1: By the way, if you if you, if you fire
Speaker 1: a warning shot and like say, oh, sorry, well now
Speaker 1: you're I have to I have to punish you in
Speaker 1: so many words. Uh and and and you know, for
Speaker 1: a month, hire a babysitter. And and maybe and maybe
Speaker 1: that will sort of say, oh shit, he wasn't fucking around,
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna I'm gonna correct myself. Maybe. Yeah, all right,
Speaker 1: you're welcome. You're welcome, Julian, Julian, I'm gonna be honest
Speaker 1: with you. That's a tough one because families and and
Speaker 1: uh and beliefs and everything like that that you know,
Speaker 1: these are the things that break families apart. Uh yeah.
Speaker 1: But most but most important, you sound like a very
Speaker 1: good father who wants to raise a very open um
Speaker 1: kind child. And applaud you liberating as hell to get
Speaker 1: toxicity out of your life. Yeah, I agree, and I'm
Speaker 1: definitely trying. You know, when you when you get when
Speaker 1: you get a lot of toxicity out of your life
Speaker 1: and get rid of the toxic people in your life.
Speaker 1: And then one shows up. You're like, whoa, I don't
Speaker 1: have this in my life anymore. You stand out like
Speaker 1: a sore thumb. Yeah right, it's true. I'm excited, but
Speaker 1: I just it makes me sad, but I'm excited to
Speaker 1: move on. Yeah, I think that's I think that's healthy
Speaker 1: for you, my friend. All right, Uh, we did Julian.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for coming on and we really
Speaker 1: appreciate you, and congrats on your beautiful love story. Thank you.
Speaker 1: Thank you guys for having me. Of course, that's take
Speaker 1: care well, thank you Julian. Ladies and gentlemen, give it
Speaker 1: up for Julian sent them. That's right, sentinental. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I like Julian sentimental. That's funny. Yeah, um, all right,
Speaker 1: we did it, guys. I think we did another fun adventure.
Speaker 1: That's all we have to say. We have new merch
Speaker 1: in the merch store. There's some cool T shirts. There's
Speaker 1: one of Joel. It's a beautiful artist rendition of our
Speaker 1: of our podcast Queen Respect. You can put it on anything.
Speaker 1: I realize that you can put it on a onesie.
Speaker 1: Last night, so I was I was putting it on
Speaker 1: a onesie. I don't even have a child to give
Speaker 1: it to you. I just wanted to see what Joel's
Speaker 1: face would look like on a onesie. Silly love it?
Speaker 1: Water bottles coming soon? Yeah, and the water bottles are
Speaker 1: coming soon. Um. All right, guys, we love you, we
Speaker 1: appreciate you, and we hope you had a smile today. Donald,
Speaker 1: what are those numbers? You love someone? Stories? Not sure?
Speaker 1: We made about a bunch of doctor nurses and jann
Speaker 1: I said, here's the stories. Never should so gado? Around here?
Speaker 1: Are yadoo around here? Are respect for you? M