Speaker 1: Welcome to Guys We Fucked. Guys We Guys Book. I'm Christina.
Speaker 1: I'm We're sorry about last night, the anti slut shaming podcast.
Speaker 1: I never stopped. What up, fuckers. Welcome to another episode
Speaker 1: of Guys We Fuck. It's the anti slut shaming podcast.
Speaker 1: I'm Karren. I'm Christina. Are you doing I'd be pride, y'all.
Speaker 1: I hope you guys are having an amazing Gay Pride month.
Speaker 1: The Gay Pride Parade was so amazing this year in
Speaker 1: New York City, biggest crowd ever, one point three million
Speaker 1: people history. It was wonderful. I was wearing a multicolored wig.
Speaker 1: Gay part is the best day of the year and
Speaker 1: I and I and I forget that until every year
Speaker 1: when it comes around, I'm like, oh, yeah, this is
Speaker 1: the best day of the year because it's just celebrating love.
Speaker 1: Love love is there's a lot of annoying, like annoying
Speaker 1: like parades in New York where New Yorkers are just like,
Speaker 1: I can't even get through. This is just like blocking
Speaker 1: my way to this, and I feel like that's gay.
Speaker 1: Probably like no one feels that way. No one's in
Speaker 1: a bad move about it. And it was great, and
Speaker 1: thank you to all the fuckers who stopped by and
Speaker 1: donated to New Alternatives. That is so amazing. Again, that's
Speaker 1: like an lgbt Q I a UM place that shelters
Speaker 1: endangered teens. Endangered teens. It's my accent because I said dangers, risks,
Speaker 1: and stilt and it's still sounded like endangered. UM and
Speaker 1: a shout out to Marco and his friend and his
Speaker 1: fiance who came by. He asked me to shout him out,
Speaker 1: and I wrote your name on my wrist so I
Speaker 1: wouldn't forget. I was gonna say, do you get a
Speaker 1: tattoo in yours? Is? Marco? What the fuck? That's how
Speaker 1: much I was like, I'm definitely gonna forget, but I
Speaker 1: know you were very enthusiastic and you just want to
Speaker 1: shout out. There was also a bunch of other people
Speaker 1: who stopped by, and UM, I really appreciate that. Thanks
Speaker 1: for taking the time. Uh, can you still donate to
Speaker 1: New Alternatives? Yeah? I mean always, you can always do
Speaker 1: It's I'm sure it's New Alternatives dot org. I don't
Speaker 1: know for sure alternatives. It's just yeah, it's just a
Speaker 1: center and they recently lost their space downtown, so they're
Speaker 1: moving uptown and they provide mental healthcare, food, clothing, shelter
Speaker 1: to at risk LGBT teens and everyone, but they concentrate
Speaker 1: on the youth. God damn. I love Pride Parade day.
Speaker 1: It's the best day. It's like, you really like want
Speaker 1: to cry, You're there's so much love in the air.
Speaker 1: I mean I do anyway, I cry every year because
Speaker 1: the last time we did it when we marched for
Speaker 1: marriage equality, which we don't mark for anymore because there's
Speaker 1: marriage equality. Hey. Um, I always see people get proposed
Speaker 1: to and then I just like, you know what I
Speaker 1: like doing now. I like smiling at I love smiling
Speaker 1: at people, but like especially like I remember there was
Speaker 1: there's this mom I was on Pride. We were trying
Speaker 1: to get to Steven and I are trying to get
Speaker 1: to Brooklyn, and we kind of went through the parade
Speaker 1: so we could see it and kind of hang. And
Speaker 1: then there was this these lesbian couple and they were
Speaker 1: each carrying a baby and then I just looked at
Speaker 1: her and I smiled and she smiled back, and I
Speaker 1: was like, that was nice. And I did that to
Speaker 1: like anybody who cut Like, I just try and smile
Speaker 1: at people who maybe I don't know, they look down
Speaker 1: in the dumps. I'm like, you need to smile, and
Speaker 1: sometimes they won't look at me, so I kind of
Speaker 1: force something. It's well, that's weird. Yeah, you know that's
Speaker 1: a creepy. I know. I was like, when you love
Speaker 1: guys with it, when I think it's you know, nice
Speaker 1: to smile instead of just like, yeah, I usually smile
Speaker 1: at women on the subway. I never smile at men though,
Speaker 1: because I mean that's just because then they're like, so
Speaker 1: I don't smile, that's an invitation for trouble. And I'm
Speaker 1: sorry guys grown grave on that. Oh yeah, well you
Speaker 1: taught me to never make eye contact with people, like
Speaker 1: specifically like dudes on the subway, because every time I do. Yeah,
Speaker 1: You're like, why you are crazy to talk to me,
Speaker 1: always approaching me, and I'm like, well, it's probably because
Speaker 1: you're walking around smiling at people everyone. I just thought
Speaker 1: handing out free smiles was like a nice thing, but
Speaker 1: apparently the shitty people ruin it for everyone as usual.
Speaker 1: I mean, there are also things in life that smile
Speaker 1: can't fix. What can't a smile? Like if you just
Speaker 1: found out someone in your family died. A smile isn't
Speaker 1: gonna help. It would actually infuriate me. Okay, but I'd
Speaker 1: feel like what then you need a smile like yeah,
Speaker 1: or like a breakup. I mean there are some like
Speaker 1: if you're just having like a rough Dave smile is nice,
Speaker 1: like a smile, A smile or like when someone when
Speaker 1: I when I go to like a like a food
Speaker 1: place or a fuckings you know, a pharmacy or whatever,
Speaker 1: and the person behind the cash register is like very friendly,
Speaker 1: not in an overly bearing, like you know, digging into
Speaker 1: my personal life kind of way, but in a hey
Speaker 1: how are you today? Like you know what, how good?
Speaker 1: How are you? Oh? That's nice. It just means a lot. Well,
Speaker 1: it just makes you it's nice to go into a
Speaker 1: place of business and not feel like you are troubling.
Speaker 1: Oh my god person. Yeah, I always put that on me.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, it gets making their day worse. No,
Speaker 1: it's like, now, smile bitch, I mean you are, but
Speaker 1: it's not you, Christina Hutchinson. It's it's me as of
Speaker 1: the business. Yeah, you human who walked in here right
Speaker 1: exactly when I get when I die, I want to
Speaker 1: make a request to have my my face, you know
Speaker 1: how like the Morgue put to make a bonny and
Speaker 1: ship and they put your hands over your heart, whatever
Speaker 1: they do, I want to fucking smile on my face.
Speaker 1: Perfect you do that kind of get amaldehyde did a smile?
Speaker 1: You know. I mean, I'm sure if you die with
Speaker 1: enough money, anything is possible. I wonder if they charge
Speaker 1: extra to make the corpse smile. I'm sure. I'm sure
Speaker 1: if there's an extra fluids that needs to be injected
Speaker 1: into your body, that there will be even smiles cost
Speaker 1: extra Jesus Christy, I think yeah. I mean I think
Speaker 1: they normally go with kind of like the just straight across,
Speaker 1: like my I feel neutral about this death, yeah, but
Speaker 1: like I don't want them to feel neutral, like I
Speaker 1: want to be happy. I mean also, I also think
Speaker 1: it depends how you because if it's tragic, that's probably
Speaker 1: gonna not be good for Like what if I was
Speaker 1: making a funny face, maybe it would make people cheer up?
Speaker 1: Maybe not not? I mean you could yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: you could put that in your well, okay, it's don't
Speaker 1: see you, it's you. Yes, my life, I'll live at
Speaker 1: how I want exactly. If you want to. If you
Speaker 1: want to be smiling in the casket, you do and
Speaker 1: I will. Um come see us live, guys uh Friday
Speaker 1: July eight it's the two year anniversary of Nacho Bitches,
Speaker 1: co hosted by myself and Blair Saki at Near Comedy Club.
Speaker 1: I wish I could tell you the things that are
Speaker 1: gonna happen, but they're so crazy and yet unplanned that
Speaker 1: I cannot let you know what is happening. Tickets are
Speaker 1: ten dollars with code Nacho. It's eleven fifteen pm. Just
Speaker 1: fucking be there. I'm not gonna let you down that
Speaker 1: you know, last minute is awesome. Just get tickets. Thanks. Monday,
Speaker 1: July eighteenth is our last Guys we Fu test tour
Speaker 1: date at Subculture, which is in New York City, forty
Speaker 1: five Bleaker Street. Um the tickets. I think there are
Speaker 1: still a couple of tickets available, so the link is
Speaker 1: in the description of this podcast. Get them while you can,
Speaker 1: because these shows do sell out and they're fucking fun.
Speaker 1: Holy sh it, doors at seven, show at eight. It's
Speaker 1: all ages. If you're under sixteen, come with an adult.
Speaker 1: And then on Saturday June, also in New York City,
Speaker 1: July July. God damn it. Sometimes I forget which numbers
Speaker 1: mean which months. I gotta chumped down like us. I
Speaker 1: had to Google, had to tell time on a watch recently,
Speaker 1: so I really I can't alright throw stuff bad anymore.
Speaker 1: Um is a glamorous July seven pm ats inc Bar
Speaker 1: on the West Village, hosted by Wendy Starling and myself.
Speaker 1: Last show, you missed some grade A titties. That's all
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say. And then on Friday, July the more
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, there's our Montreal, Canada. Just for last state.
Speaker 1: The first guys we fucked live or podcast recording sold out,
Speaker 1: so they were nice enough to add a second one,
Speaker 1: and we're very excited. It's on Friday July three thirty
Speaker 1: pm in the afternoon, but we're gonna make it feel
Speaker 1: like it's midnight. If you're in Montreal and don't know
Speaker 1: about just for laughs, I can't imagine that you don't.
Speaker 1: But it's like the coolest comedy festival ever, so please
Speaker 1: come hang with us there. And you don't need a
Speaker 1: festival pass if you want for this show. You can
Speaker 1: actually buy an individual ticket, which is exciting because sometimes
Speaker 1: festival passes or thousands of bucks. But for our show
Speaker 1: for nineteens dollars in fourteen cents, you can get a ticket.
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Speaker 1: Lee perfect. I love it. Ladies and gentlemen. Big news
Speaker 1: that we have a website. Whoa you guys are? Like?
Speaker 1: Where do we find your faces? And who is who?
Speaker 1: And what have you done in your life? And where
Speaker 1: can I see you live? All those questions and more
Speaker 1: are now answered that's sorry about last night comedy dot
Speaker 1: com dot com. You can see where We're gonna be,
Speaker 1: you can see the podcasts, you can see a photo
Speaker 1: of us. You can ask us for advice. The list
Speaker 1: goes on and on and on. Yeah, Karen and I
Speaker 1: had a photo shoot with a photographer digs who Love,
Speaker 1: and she took a lot of really cool photos that
Speaker 1: are that we put up on the website that no
Speaker 1: one has seen yet. So like, if you want to
Speaker 1: see us being if you want to put them on
Speaker 1: your phone as a screen saver, if you want to
Speaker 1: master babe, please don't tell us about that now you can.
Speaker 1: Why would I need to do We're gonna do. I
Speaker 1: don't care, It's all good tell me, yeah, absolutely all right,
Speaker 1: And if you want to email us. Oh, also, guys,
Speaker 1: can you use a favor? Can you rate us on iTunes?
Speaker 1: If you if you listen to this podcast on iTunes? Honestly,
Speaker 1: even if you don't, who cares um rate us? Because
Speaker 1: that helps well with the charts and we keep we're
Speaker 1: we've been staying in the top ten, which is really cool.
Speaker 1: I think we're one of the only podcasts in the
Speaker 1: top ten with four out of five stars. Everyone has
Speaker 1: a minimum and have my mom likes to point that
Speaker 1: out time time. There's a lot of like these horse
Speaker 1: reviews that are zero stars and uh, I mean, you
Speaker 1: know whatever, But if you like us, give us a rating, yeah,
Speaker 1: of five stars. I would recommend and say what you
Speaker 1: like about the podcast and maybe a little, you know,
Speaker 1: a sentence or to about why a new listener might
Speaker 1: want to tune into the podcast, or how it's helped
Speaker 1: you or how it's not helped you. I mean, whatever
Speaker 1: you need, it's important. Um. All right, let's read some
Speaker 1: listener emails and if you want to email us for
Speaker 1: advice or just to tell us that you're drunk and
Speaker 1: we're thinking of us and sorry about last night show
Speaker 1: at gmail dot com dot com. Alright, the subject is hockey,
Speaker 1: rape threats, talking ambulances. Oh, it sounds like a fun Friday.
Speaker 1: It's a lot while people have been really stepping up
Speaker 1: their email subject line gamel Right, Hey, Christina and Karin.
Speaker 1: Just wanted to start by saying, I'm a huge fan
Speaker 1: of the podcast obviously, and I admire both of your
Speaker 1: confidence so much. I see both of you as great
Speaker 1: examples of strong, independent women for young girls to look up.
Speaker 1: To anyways, on with my story A little bit about me.
Speaker 1: My name is can I say it? No, my name
Speaker 1: is something I can't say. And I'm seventeen year old
Speaker 1: female from Alberta, Canada. I've played hockey all my life,
Speaker 1: usually participating on all girls teams, but earlier this year
Speaker 1: I was approached by the coach to try out for
Speaker 1: competitive boys hockey. I made the team as the only girl,
Speaker 1: stuck with seventeen teenage boys. I found that my team
Speaker 1: respected me, but teams that we played against did not.
Speaker 1: One game, as I was playing hockey, a player on
Speaker 1: the opposing team pinned me against the boards and whispered
Speaker 1: things in my ears such as I want to fuck
Speaker 1: you so badly, and come on, baby, don't be a tease.
Speaker 1: Let me put my dick inside you. Yep, all right, guys,
Speaker 1: wonderful um. I didn't respond, which seemed to make him angrier,
Speaker 1: so he threw me against the ice as we were
Speaker 1: still playing hockey and said I'm going to have sex
Speaker 1: with you, whether you want to or not a Valentine's card.
Speaker 1: In complete shock, I informed my coach, who was furious,
Speaker 1: actually getting suspended three games for yelling at the other team.
Speaker 1: But when the league was contacted to deal with the incident,
Speaker 1: they said she had it coming. If she can't handle it,
Speaker 1: she shouldn't play boys hockey. Wow, well, at least we
Speaker 1: know that Canada is also bad like America. Yeah, also
Speaker 1: stating that hockey Canada has no sexual harassment policy in place,
Speaker 1: letting the player have no consequences at all. A few
Speaker 1: months later, I had another ordinary game against a different team.
Speaker 1: I put my gear on in a separate change room,
Speaker 1: as it's inappropriate to change with the boys. Right before game,
Speaker 1: my coach came inside my chage room talking about the
Speaker 1: game when the door opened and the guy from the
Speaker 1: previous team who had threatened to rate me walked in.
Speaker 1: He had stalked my schedule and came to the arena
Speaker 1: to fulfill his promises. Seeing my coach with me scared him,
Speaker 1: and my coach began to approach him when the player
Speaker 1: took off running. This completely terrified me as I was
Speaker 1: there to play hockey in a safe environment. Once again,
Speaker 1: the league was contacted and they said, well, we can't
Speaker 1: really do anything as he did not physically harm you.
Speaker 1: O god where she had sent his full name. Um,
Speaker 1: no matter how hard my parents, coach, and I fought
Speaker 1: the player got off with no punishments. Again a month later,
Speaker 1: we played the team again with the guy that threatened
Speaker 1: to rate me and stalked me. I told myself I
Speaker 1: was not going to let him scare me and participated
Speaker 1: in the game. At first, things were calm, but then
Speaker 1: the guy targeted me. Um trapped me in a corner
Speaker 1: on the ice and took his hockey stick and dug
Speaker 1: it into my ribs where I had no padding. Then
Speaker 1: with his other hand, he slammed my head into the ice.
Speaker 1: In complete shock, I got up and skated to the bench,
Speaker 1: which was the worst decision because once I got to
Speaker 1: the bench, I collapsed as my rib cage or as
Speaker 1: my rib had been broken and began puncturing my lung.
Speaker 1: I laid on the bench, unable to breathe and beginning
Speaker 1: to pass out as the other team was screaming things
Speaker 1: at me like that's what you get, bitch, and I
Speaker 1: guess you shouldn't play boys hockey if you can't take
Speaker 1: the pain. And the parents from the other team cheered
Speaker 1: as they had seen their players successfully in Jeremy, are
Speaker 1: parents the best? Yeah, they're the best? I kept going
Speaker 1: in and out of consciousness as my mom and coach
Speaker 1: stood over me, screaming to stay awake until the paramedics came.
Speaker 1: Shortly after, I was loaded into the ambulance and given
Speaker 1: morphine to stabilize the pain. When I heard screaming from outside,
Speaker 1: my dad and coach were fighting the opposing teams coaches.
Speaker 1: Not only that, but the players from my team had
Speaker 1: a broken hockey stick over the guy's back who had
Speaker 1: hurt me. After medical attention, I physically recovered, but emotionally
Speaker 1: I was a wreck that was and still is in
Speaker 1: constant fear of this guy finding me again. After the
Speaker 1: ambulance incident, I demanded that the league do something, but
Speaker 1: once again I was shut down. The league said it's
Speaker 1: the price of being a girl and participating in boys hockey,
Speaker 1: which makes me furious that I now live in fear
Speaker 1: and he gets off free with the satisfaction of knowing
Speaker 1: he nearly killed me. So I'm asking for thoughts and opinions,
Speaker 1: as well as advice on how to not feel like
Speaker 1: a victim and move on without living in fear. Thank
Speaker 1: you both so much, A lot of love, sincerely, hockey
Speaker 1: player girl. Wow that email fucking now I I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't handle these situations very well. Yeah, you don't know,
Speaker 1: because I would fucking beat the fucking ship out of
Speaker 1: that punk ass little cun kid. Sometimes this is an
Speaker 1: instance where she probably physically could. Yeah. Uh, it's really
Speaker 1: disappointing that um that that fucking hockey league didn't do
Speaker 1: anything about it and won't protect her. So boys hockey,
Speaker 1: I guess is uh, it's totally cool to just kick it.
Speaker 1: I know, because I know violence and hockey and fighting
Speaker 1: it as part of white people go and they want
Speaker 1: to see the fights. Yeah, it's a very violent for it.
Speaker 1: But I mean also even you know, even if it
Speaker 1: was just physical, I can see, even in a fucked
Speaker 1: up way like defending the physicality of hockey. But there's
Speaker 1: no way that you can defend it when there when
Speaker 1: there was a threat of rape and just clear sexual prosmate,
Speaker 1: because you know, this guy isn't going up to dudes
Speaker 1: and saying I'm get my dick inside you, because then
Speaker 1: he'd be yeah, absolutely not. But here here's the way
Speaker 1: to to not feel like a victim, because I think,
Speaker 1: I think that can be really tough, and I think
Speaker 1: when bad ship has happened, to me in the past,
Speaker 1: especially it's called seventeen, it's really young. When bad ship
Speaker 1: has happened to me. When I was like that young,
Speaker 1: I would just internalize it and feel sorry for myself
Speaker 1: and not do anything about it. But now what I
Speaker 1: do is like when when they're situations that I could
Speaker 1: be sometimes afraid from my life in that like feeling,
Speaker 1: you know, it's dangerous to walk in this area of
Speaker 1: the city at night or whatever, I just I just
Speaker 1: tell myself, like I don't think of it as me
Speaker 1: walking in the streets, Like I kind of just men
Speaker 1: need to understand that. Like I feel like if women
Speaker 1: are constantly living in fear, that's not going to solve anything.
Speaker 1: So you have to almost like be brave on half
Speaker 1: but half of like a gender webs I think that
Speaker 1: an easy you have. This is a situation where I
Speaker 1: don't want to put this responsibility on you, but I
Speaker 1: kind of feel you need to be a groundbreaker. This
Speaker 1: is your opportunity. This is your chance to you know,
Speaker 1: break the your your own version of you know that
Speaker 1: we've heard of, like the color barrier. This is the
Speaker 1: this is the gender barrier, and this is your opportunity
Speaker 1: to do something that is bigger than your career in
Speaker 1: boys hockey in Canada. Um, you can really change some
Speaker 1: things here. And I know a lot of times we
Speaker 1: give kind of advice like this and people write and well,
Speaker 1: that sound safe, and you don't you know, Yeah, of
Speaker 1: course it is unsafe. It's unsafe. Ship like this is unsafe.
Speaker 1: Any progress we've made as far as gender or sexuality
Speaker 1: or race comes with fucking risk. And that rose flood,
Speaker 1: It includes a risk to your very your welfare as
Speaker 1: a human. But I mean, I think you know your
Speaker 1: parents are on your side for safety. And I mean
Speaker 1: even if you have to fucking hire a goddamn security
Speaker 1: guard to escort you to the game like two games,
Speaker 1: like I don't know what kind of financial situation you're in,
Speaker 1: or if someone who's awesome would just lend their time
Speaker 1: to be your security guarded games. You need to keep
Speaker 1: playing fucking hockey, and you need to keep pushing the
Speaker 1: fact that this person who harassed you and threatened you
Speaker 1: and physically assaulted you needs to needs to pay for
Speaker 1: his action. Yeah, and and honestly, like I think I
Speaker 1: wouldn't if if I were you, But I understand you're
Speaker 1: not wanting to handle this way, I wouldn't shut the
Speaker 1: funk up about it. I waly wun't ring up every
Speaker 1: other second, but I would. I would not let people
Speaker 1: forget that this has happened to you, and I would
Speaker 1: not let people forget who the person was who did
Speaker 1: it to you. And I would just constantly, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: when that comes up in conversation, fucking talk about it
Speaker 1: and talk about like that's one of the obstacles that
Speaker 1: you have to go through. Unfortunately, when you're a woman
Speaker 1: in a sport that's produced, you know, predominantly men, you
Speaker 1: have to go through harder things. I mean, Jesus Christ,
Speaker 1: like so many people, so many heroes of social movements
Speaker 1: had to overcome way more obstacles than a fucking white dude,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. And I always always comes
Speaker 1: back to white men. But also, like you look at
Speaker 1: the obstacles that black people have had to face in
Speaker 1: this fucking country and still have to face getting a job.
Speaker 1: The job rates, even with equal education are uneven because
Speaker 1: people are racist pieces of ship, and you have to
Speaker 1: do much more and work much harder, and be more
Speaker 1: persistent than the than the regular person or the person
Speaker 1: next to you has to be but that's I mean,
Speaker 1: it's character building, and it's something that you could see
Speaker 1: as like a challenge, an exciting challenge to be a
Speaker 1: positive example, to change the minds of the of the
Speaker 1: boys that you play with, and change the minds of
Speaker 1: the parents because they're not acting cool. Yeah. And anytime
Speaker 1: I think you're a minority, I think you. Yeah, a
Speaker 1: lot of minorities will complain whether you be a racial minority,
Speaker 1: agender minority, that oh I have to it seems like
Speaker 1: I have to be better to get equal, and yeah,
Speaker 1: you do. And it's not fair because the way it is,
Speaker 1: and it's only going to make you a better individual
Speaker 1: and a better player, and it's I think it's a
Speaker 1: great starting point, honestly. Is that your own team accepted
Speaker 1: you with such arms. That's very strong. That's that's wonderful.
Speaker 1: The fact that you were allowed to try out for
Speaker 1: the boys team because you were so talented, Um, that's huge.
Speaker 1: That's really exciting. And that you're embraced by the boys
Speaker 1: that you play with, that's really cool. And they have
Speaker 1: your fucking back. So yeah, I think I would keep
Speaker 1: on going and do this for all the women. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I think we're in a climate right now where
Speaker 1: it's kind of like popular to like be like, well,
Speaker 1: if I didn't get justice with with the law, I'm
Speaker 1: going to go to social media. I don't always necessarily
Speaker 1: agree with that. I don't think it's the best tactic.
Speaker 1: I think you should continue to fight it from a
Speaker 1: legal standpoint. I mean a lot of times these things
Speaker 1: cost money as far as like hiring a lawyer. Again,
Speaker 1: sometimes you're just gonna find someone who truly wants to
Speaker 1: make a difference in the world, who will lend their
Speaker 1: time as a lawyer for you. Um and uh. I
Speaker 1: think it's important to you know, show up at local meetings,
Speaker 1: write letters to the lawmakers, write letters to this this
Speaker 1: hockey board, Like just don't be silenced, because that's how
Speaker 1: they keep their their power, that's how they gain control. Yeah,
Speaker 1: silences can be very, very very deadly, especially when it
Speaker 1: comes to social issues. Yeah, this is so heinous, and
Speaker 1: this is and this and this person number one obviously
Speaker 1: should not be playing hockey. But just think of if
Speaker 1: he's doing this in a hockey game, Like, how is
Speaker 1: he treating the women in his life? How is he
Speaker 1: treating his girlfriend? Like what other kinds of harmful things
Speaker 1: is he doing this is someone who and Jesus Christ,
Speaker 1: you know, because you know, it's not only for justice
Speaker 1: for yourself, it's preventing it from happening to somebody else
Speaker 1: in the future. And yeah, that's not your responsibility, but
Speaker 1: I think it's a very bold and important thing that
Speaker 1: you could do here. Um, yeah, and it's great, and
Speaker 1: thank you for sharing the letter with us. But just
Speaker 1: make fucking noise, be a goddamn hero, be a fucking
Speaker 1: badass bitch, and play hockey and be the best fucking
Speaker 1: hockey player that you can fucking be. And fuck that
Speaker 1: guy metaphorically. God, God, don't, Oh my god, please please
Speaker 1: please don't, please don't. Yeah, but of course I mean
Speaker 1: do all this, you know safely. You know this person
Speaker 1: is obviously not a dangerous person. And yeah, fucking around
Speaker 1: so you know, yeah, do it. Be be bold but smart,
Speaker 1: cautious and uproarious, silent hero, but allowed one at the
Speaker 1: same time. Do you know what I'm saying? You know,
Speaker 1: you get what we're saying. Oh boy, um, we have
Speaker 1: a great episode for you today, ladies, gentlemen's fuckers all around. Uh.
Speaker 1: Today we're sitting down with a wonderfully talented comedian and actress.
Speaker 1: She has lived all over the country and the world,
Speaker 1: and we share a very interesting common ex boyfriend. Ladies
Speaker 1: and gentlemen, please give it up for Amber Nelson car
Speaker 1: showdow flu is everything back to the beginning where we
Speaker 1: first love. It hurts sort of things, and it's awa
Speaker 1: to breaking from the corners of the credit room. So
Speaker 1: it takes a little couragement. It means a whole more too.
Speaker 1: Jump into the river will be side by side or
Speaker 1: playing and by it at lea sits right this time
Speaker 1: and its sashes me. It breaks me down and I
Speaker 1: fell down. Beess all over account good. It's shp ever,
Speaker 1: she makes Sven, she makes me, Hey, we're here with Hamburg. Yes,
Speaker 1: we're so thankful that you could be here. We're excited.
Speaker 1: Were like, we both love you, and we get we
Speaker 1: get more nervous around women, like than anyone, you know,
Speaker 1: I can't talk to. I was at the Olive Tree
Speaker 1: the other day and I wanted to talk to Rachel
Speaker 1: fine Stein about doing the podcast, and I'm a huge
Speaker 1: fan of hers, and I was like, hey, Rachel, would
Speaker 1: you maybe I have this podcast? And and then she
Speaker 1: walked she said yes. She was super nice and then
Speaker 1: Ryan Reese was sitting next there. He's like that was
Speaker 1: like watching like a thirteen year old boy. I talked
Speaker 1: to his favorite poem star, like I can't do it.
Speaker 1: It's hard, yeah, And I don't know why, because women
Speaker 1: are I love women. I love women. Maybe I have
Speaker 1: expect more from them, or like I don't know, I
Speaker 1: just want them to love me, or maybe I don't know,
Speaker 1: we just have because women can also be either we
Speaker 1: can ruin a life the worst, you know, like the
Speaker 1: way men are like physically stronger emotionally, like we can
Speaker 1: kill a person with our words. It's a little jarring
Speaker 1: to have that power. You have to use it for good.
Speaker 1: And when I tend to overcompensate around women too, because
Speaker 1: I feel like there is that initial, like instinctly that
Speaker 1: women have to, like I don't know, either be meaner
Speaker 1: to another woman or I'm just like so overly nice
Speaker 1: they like you, and then they just think I'm a
Speaker 1: big weirdo. I think something's ingrained in us from a
Speaker 1: long time ago, because it was classically, if you've got power,
Speaker 1: you were more um physical, you're a strong man in town.
Speaker 1: So women, in order to get what little power we
Speaker 1: could would probably have to knock other women down to
Speaker 1: like get the prize mail in the village a bit. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was that was the golden way in. But now
Speaker 1: you know, the silos are filled, the economy is fine,
Speaker 1: and I think women could just be fine with each other. Right,
Speaker 1: it's a new era for us. It's really fun. So
Speaker 1: what it tell us about, like your life growing up?
Speaker 1: Because you were you lived overseas for lived in Saudi
Speaker 1: Arabia for a while. I was, he was born there
Speaker 1: and I lived there for seven years. You were born
Speaker 1: in Saudia on a military My father worked for a
Speaker 1: Ramco oil. Oh so are you So what's your citizenship?
Speaker 1: It's American. You're not allowed to have duel. But I
Speaker 1: was Saudi for three days and then I got sworn in.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, well you got sworn in as a three
Speaker 1: day year old. Yeah yeah. My dad just lifted my
Speaker 1: little tiny hand. It was like, oh, she agrees, she agrees, American.
Speaker 1: What's it like? How long did you live in Saudi Arabia?
Speaker 1: Seven years? So I wasn't under sharia law because I
Speaker 1: hadn't started my period yet, so I could still kind
Speaker 1: of run around and be like a little weird girl.
Speaker 1: I think it would be different if I were to
Speaker 1: go over now, yeah, wait a little bit. What is
Speaker 1: the period thing? The Sharia law happens when a girl
Speaker 1: starts her period or when a boy begins having a
Speaker 1: night secretions like pretty cool, when they getquid dreams liquid dreams,
Speaker 1: which is so like that's cool, watches gross? Does the
Speaker 1: boy come into their parents bedroom all morning like a
Speaker 1: jazz mom? I think so. Yeah, Well they're probably like
Speaker 1: happier to have be under that law because they get
Speaker 1: more rights because their boys. So I'm sure they probably
Speaker 1: even brag a little bit before they're ready. What do
Speaker 1: the girl? What do the girls get when they their period?
Speaker 1: And then you have to put you ned? Then now
Speaker 1: you have a broka and now you are considered a woman,
Speaker 1: and any law that you break if you're if you're
Speaker 1: a man or a woman, you are tried the same
Speaker 1: as if you are ten or fifty. Uh. Yeah, there's
Speaker 1: no such thing as being a child, So that's some
Speaker 1: responsibility that kids have. Good. Yeah, so obviously we were
Speaker 1: very young when you left, But did you witness anything
Speaker 1: that has stayed with you? A Few things, you know,
Speaker 1: I remember, like the sunsets being really beautiful and like
Speaker 1: I would be wheeled into the village and people would
Speaker 1: like play with my hair and look at my skin,
Speaker 1: and because they've never seen a white girl before and
Speaker 1: they were just like an awe uh. And they were
Speaker 1: you know, because they were public executions that were go on,
Speaker 1: and you kind of you had to watch or else
Speaker 1: you are now suspect of being like not as pious
Speaker 1: as your neighbor. Have you watched a public execution? I
Speaker 1: my parents would kind of shield my eyes, but I
Speaker 1: could hear. I remember like screams and you know, you
Speaker 1: read out versus of the of the book to um
Speaker 1: justify yeah, and notions are like yeah, hands, yeah, well
Speaker 1: what kinds of things do you? Were you aware like
Speaker 1: what kinds of things they were being executed for? What
Speaker 1: kind of crimes? Absolutely, you're very aware very young of
Speaker 1: like what to do and what not to do. Do
Speaker 1: not steal? I never remember like casino. As a kid,
Speaker 1: sometimes you like take little things out of the store
Speaker 1: put in your pockets. You have no concept of like stealing.
Speaker 1: It was it's fine. I just take a little candy
Speaker 1: and that's fine. But as a very young age, it
Speaker 1: was very aware, like do not put this in your pockets.
Speaker 1: Do not like hold onto this? Do they? Don't? You
Speaker 1: get your hand cut off In some countries when you steal,
Speaker 1: you get your right hand cut off because your left
Speaker 1: hand you ship with it and you wipe with it.
Speaker 1: So now you have to eat with your shift hand,
Speaker 1: so you wipe your ass with your hand? Did you
Speaker 1: wipe your ass with your hand? When I was like,
Speaker 1: I remember being in some like more rural places where
Speaker 1: you had to but you know, most when you are home,
Speaker 1: because we did live in a compound that was very small.
Speaker 1: So but if if you wanted like groceries or to
Speaker 1: stretch your legs or hospital or anything, you had to
Speaker 1: go out, and uh, you know, some places you have
Speaker 1: to shoot your wipe your Now, did your parents ever
Speaker 1: explain to you the hey, we're gonna go see this
Speaker 1: public execution and that's not something they do everywhere. But
Speaker 1: I don't know, did they give you any sort of
Speaker 1: international like feel of how this country operates a little
Speaker 1: more strictly? Not really, not really, they just kind of
Speaker 1: we would already be out, you know, and you would
Speaker 1: hear like a little boy stole something, or maybe a
Speaker 1: girl was you know, little raped or whatever. I didn't
Speaker 1: have the male witnesses, and they would kind of you.
Speaker 1: You'd have to gether around. It was like a spectacle,
Speaker 1: but they kind of shielded me. It seems like a
Speaker 1: more jarring move even for your mom to make though,
Speaker 1: because because she was from America. I'm guessing more in
Speaker 1: America and then as an adult woman moving to Saudi Arabia.
Speaker 1: So was she wearing that she had to wear the
Speaker 1: traditional garb? Right? Was you cover your hair, um, and
Speaker 1: you cover like body extremities like no arms. No. I
Speaker 1: remember her getting her ankles just kind of switched at
Speaker 1: because she was showing her too much ankle and my
Speaker 1: dad just like put her in a car and they
Speaker 1: were like run away immediately. Things like that. And now
Speaker 1: these laws seem like they're put in place too so
Speaker 1: that the government has control over people, and like I know, sexuality,
Speaker 1: a lot of times the government wants to feel like
Speaker 1: they have control over specifically a woman's sexuality because then
Speaker 1: a lot of some men can't control themselves and they
Speaker 1: just would rather put that burden on the woman to
Speaker 1: cover up, so the guy doesn't even have to like
Speaker 1: have that question in his head. Um, is that why
Speaker 1: you think they were there like control or was they
Speaker 1: religious even though that can also make control. It's a
Speaker 1: big control. Um uh yeah. Yeah, woman's not supposed to
Speaker 1: show her body because then a man would be sexually
Speaker 1: aroused by that. But all annoying. I know, it's so
Speaker 1: it's it's pretty bad. But wealthy people they can sort
Speaker 1: of do whatever they want. They can party, they premarital
Speaker 1: sex whatever. I mean, I don't know. I can't really
Speaker 1: speak to wealthy girls and a wealthy boys, can she
Speaker 1: realized really for like poor people to keep them scared
Speaker 1: and outsiders like Americans and the Brits that came in. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I wonder if any guys, any men in that country
Speaker 1: were offended. Probably not by the fact that these laws
Speaker 1: were put in place, because men can control themselves. That's
Speaker 1: essentially the reasoning. Yeah, I feel like you're too aggressive
Speaker 1: to do anything. Yeah, like you're an animal who can't
Speaker 1: be tamed or control yourself because like a lot of
Speaker 1: men can control themselves. I wonder if that got to
Speaker 1: any of the guys. Probably not, But I mean, I
Speaker 1: think it's men that made the lass. I think they
Speaker 1: were just using that as a justification for making the
Speaker 1: law in the first place. Like I'm sure women didn't
Speaker 1: make those laws. Yeah, probably not. There's some women that,
Speaker 1: like I remember some women being like they didn't like it,
Speaker 1: and some women were totally fine because I remember speaking
Speaker 1: to the women and they would remove the brook and
Speaker 1: then that we would go in a separate room for women,
Speaker 1: and it was a lot of conversations with babies, baby baby,
Speaker 1: we have a baby, baby baby? Really yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: So and they were like well kept. You know, they
Speaker 1: always had gold. They that's nice, that's nice. Little gold.
Speaker 1: They're here, they're uh huh, like nice clothes, all incredibly beautiful.
Speaker 1: But you know, they had this thing and they looked
Speaker 1: at it as a protection for themselves. Okay, then then
Speaker 1: I can understand justifying it and be like, yeah, I
Speaker 1: love doing this. Shut up. Ye what did your parents
Speaker 1: say to you. By the time you got the sex
Speaker 1: stock you were in America, right, I always got the
Speaker 1: sex talk. It was because my mother's she's like a
Speaker 1: badass woman, and she never told me about the stork.
Speaker 1: It was always man and a woman. They his sperm
Speaker 1: fertilizes and a baby grows inside the woman. You know,
Speaker 1: that's that's awesome. I mean, I think that's a it
Speaker 1: should be more direct, not creating like some kind of
Speaker 1: a fairy tale to then where I'm a third year
Speaker 1: old woman, I am very confused about a lot of
Speaker 1: things about sex and my body. So it would have
Speaker 1: been nice if someone just like right out of the gates, Yeah,
Speaker 1: told me some true or something educational. Yeah, give me
Speaker 1: some facts, because then I'm gonna go masturbate and then
Speaker 1: be nervous. I'm gonna get pregnant. Exactly my whole five
Speaker 1: five through ten very anxious years for me, like I'm
Speaker 1: going to get pregnant. I remember like that I was.
Speaker 1: I was like, is today the day that I realized
Speaker 1: I'm pregnant. I gotta tell my mom because I would
Speaker 1: hump everything when I was a kid, and then I
Speaker 1: would look when I would go to the bathroom, but
Speaker 1: I would see it. I would wipe myself. I was
Speaker 1: just examining the paper for blood because I thought that
Speaker 1: that I was pregnant. It's hard times. Well, the high
Speaker 1: school I went to was in Franklinton, Louisiana, which is
Speaker 1: like nothing. It's in the middle of nowhere, and dad,
Speaker 1: there was no sexual education. It was just wait till
Speaker 1: marriage um and a lot of girls they would get
Speaker 1: pregnant and then they were just kind of whisked away
Speaker 1: in the middle of the night. You know, you never
Speaker 1: saw them again. What where did they go? And I
Speaker 1: have no idea. Probably I'd probably give birth to the child,
Speaker 1: get their g e D. And then probably like go
Speaker 1: work at the dollar store later on. Yeah that sounds
Speaker 1: like a bummer. Yeah, it's a real bummer. So were
Speaker 1: you like because you knew so much from your mom
Speaker 1: where you like the go to source in your high school? Like,
Speaker 1: what are all your friends are? Like, let's ask Amber,
Speaker 1: Let's ask me. Well, I was still like kind of
Speaker 1: a nerdy virgin, you know. I think people were way
Speaker 1: more experienced than me. I was just like, if I
Speaker 1: want to get out of this town, I cannot have
Speaker 1: sex with any of these guys. As then you're hooked,
Speaker 1: Like then you're like tied to it because he had
Speaker 1: a baby. Oh my god, by life, I don't know.
Speaker 1: Did you always have dreams of like being a performer
Speaker 1: and moving to a bigger city. Yeah. I always wanted
Speaker 1: to get out and it was always remember there was
Speaker 1: um one of my teachers had an extracurricular thing for
Speaker 1: the girls. The boys said something as well, but the
Speaker 1: girls had to design their own wedding manual and baby
Speaker 1: manual and then wait, wait, yeah, what creat is this
Speaker 1: for us? High school? Maybe like ninth grade mandatory? It
Speaker 1: was mandatory. Yeah, you had to design your own wedding book. Yeah,
Speaker 1: when you're gonna get married, how many kids you want
Speaker 1: to have, and like a little bit of financial planning
Speaker 1: to it, which I can understand for most women that
Speaker 1: would be like pretty helpful. But I was never that person.
Speaker 1: So I just on the sly I wrote, this is
Speaker 1: so lame. But I wrote an article about the Dalai
Speaker 1: Lama and I just handed that into I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do this, but here's this like three
Speaker 1: page paper I wrote, and she still gave me the points.
Speaker 1: Oh that's nice. I was gonna say, was already what
Speaker 1: edgy was like no kids and like or like like
Speaker 1: a young scared lesbian and at that time, like marriage
Speaker 1: isn't an option for you, like not thinking towards like
Speaker 1: having kids. I would because like, let's make a bad
Speaker 1: situation worth like a situation where you feel uncomfortable and
Speaker 1: not yourself. Was there any were there any instances in
Speaker 1: your high school of people coming out or friends you
Speaker 1: knew were homosexual or what was the like LGBT conversation. Oh,
Speaker 1: that's a good question that nobody nobody came out. I
Speaker 1: think they were very scared. My best friend in high school,
Speaker 1: he I believe he is a closeted homosexual and he
Speaker 1: still hasn't come in the closet. He's gained a lot
Speaker 1: of weight. He's very Catholic, there's a big family, but
Speaker 1: he's He would go off on weekends with boys from
Speaker 1: out of town that were homosexual, and I would wouldn't
Speaker 1: speak to him for two days, you know, things like that,
Speaker 1: Like I don't see a lot of straightment doing that.
Speaker 1: Have you ever have you ever had a conversation with
Speaker 1: him like, hey, be you because you don't want to
Speaker 1: out somebody you don't wanna. It's not necessarily your business.
Speaker 1: But if you see a close person that you love
Speaker 1: not living their life to the fullest, like maybe you
Speaker 1: want to encourage it. Have you did you ever have
Speaker 1: that talk with him? A little bit? I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, you could tell me if you were ever gay, right,
Speaker 1: And he like flipped out on me. And he was
Speaker 1: dating this girl and I told the girl straight up
Speaker 1: and like sitting in the car one day. I was like, hey, Brittany, uh,
Speaker 1: your prisond's gay. And she's like, we're gonna get married
Speaker 1: and have children together. And I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: maybe you will, but he's going to come out of
Speaker 1: the closet later on and he's going to ruin your life.
Speaker 1: And then she cried, cried, cry. He called me up
Speaker 1: and he's like, we're over, and I was like, you
Speaker 1: know what, I saved both of your lives right now.
Speaker 1: Maybe you call me a bit now, but I guarantee
Speaker 1: you'll thank me in like twenty years. I still I
Speaker 1: was looking at Facebook pictures all weekend of several people
Speaker 1: I know who are homosexual getting married to straight people
Speaker 1: and just some enjoy. I was just like, well, you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: your life. Where is he now? Is he married? I
Speaker 1: think he's like, no, he's not married. I think he's
Speaker 1: like a research guy somewhere in the Carolina's like science research.
Speaker 1: He was actually one of the few people to get
Speaker 1: out of the town um, and I think him being
Speaker 1: gay sort of made him feel separate all the time,
Speaker 1: So that's how he was able to get out. Do
Speaker 1: you think, um, when you go, do you go back
Speaker 1: home to Louisiana. Is that still your parents live? Do
Speaker 1: people like look at you weird because you're not married
Speaker 1: with kids yet? A little bit they're mostly like I
Speaker 1: think there are a little tinge of jealousy that I
Speaker 1: got out. Yeah, that's probably why they projected, because like
Speaker 1: I remember, like Steven and I just celebrated our five
Speaker 1: year anniversary like this past March, and now all the
Speaker 1: questions of like when are you getting married? When are
Speaker 1: you getting maried? From people that I didn't even think.
Speaker 1: I'm like, why the fund? Do you care? I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't care. We'll figure it out. I just want
Speaker 1: to drag you down with their lives exactly. They want
Speaker 1: their unhappiness and pringe on me. I like, fun that ship?
Speaker 1: Do you want to get married? Um, I've never really
Speaker 1: thought about it. That's not really in my thing. I
Speaker 1: mean maybe for like tax purposes. Yeah, there's some tax
Speaker 1: breaks that would be amazing. There's a lot. I mean,
Speaker 1: what are costly to be a single person when you
Speaker 1: can have the same insurance and then that is that
Speaker 1: what you taxed right off? I mean, like the government
Speaker 1: is set up so that it encourages people to couple
Speaker 1: off for sure. Yeah, well that's why you get a
Speaker 1: lot of people that are married just because like well
Speaker 1: green card marriages obviously that's there's a benefit to that.
Speaker 1: But like I feel like people just get married because
Speaker 1: like it would be the same insance. Well you could
Speaker 1: just like share, you share everything, you know, everything just
Speaker 1: cheaper if you're only paying fifty percent of it. So true,
Speaker 1: and it's like some kind of American dream of like
Speaker 1: settling to um having like a couple of kids in
Speaker 1: a house and a job. You know, that's that's what
Speaker 1: a lot of people wish for. And that's good. You know,
Speaker 1: it makes the economy very stable. It's comfort and security. Yeah,
Speaker 1: what do you What are your thoughts on kids? I
Speaker 1: like kids? Okay, um, like having them? Would you ever want? Kids?
Speaker 1: Are concerns. I like them that I always saying, like
Speaker 1: they're nice, they're fine. I've never been like a baby
Speaker 1: like some people like like to hold babies, Like I'm
Speaker 1: that babies. Yeah, it's weird. It's it's kind of annoying
Speaker 1: because it's like a thing I can't turn off. But
Speaker 1: I'm fucking my nephew. I'm like, oh, I just love
Speaker 1: babies so much. Yeah, and I'm like, great, it's annoying
Speaker 1: a little. Someone needs to I know, someone needs to
Speaker 1: love babies. But like, uh, you know, I'm twenty eight,
Speaker 1: so I mean you can have a baby tillier what
Speaker 1: in your forties early forties, and for high risk it's
Speaker 1: a geriatric pregnancy from I think thirty four thirty five
Speaker 1: onwards because my my brother's my brother's ex girlfriend who
Speaker 1: they have their child to other shurt pregnancy was considered
Speaker 1: geriatric and like, can you fucking use another word and
Speaker 1: not she's sucking thirty four whether our O world she is.
Speaker 1: What does that mean? It just means you're a higher risk.
Speaker 1: There's like a couple of things I can go wrong. Wow.
Speaker 1: When I was seventeen, I was I left home and
Speaker 1: I was bartending by this as this mill and Port Allen, Louisiana,
Speaker 1: and there was a man there. He was probably in
Speaker 1: his thirty to thirty five. You know, when you're young
Speaker 1: and someone says they're in their thirties, You're like, that's
Speaker 1: so old, so far away from me. You're never gonna
Speaker 1: live that long. I'm gonna die young and beautiful, magny God.
Speaker 1: But he told me I was seventeen. He said, by
Speaker 1: the time you're nineteen, it's gonna be harder for you
Speaker 1: to have children. And by the time twenty, no one's
Speaker 1: ever going to want you anymore. He says, you're gonna
Speaker 1: be too old. He said, you should marry me right
Speaker 1: now and start having children right now. There, I knew
Speaker 1: there was something in it for him. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: And I had just gotten a scholarship to college and
Speaker 1: I was one of the first and my family to
Speaker 1: ever go and it was a four years totally free
Speaker 1: and I knew that would be something I have to
Speaker 1: capitalize on now because I could never do it. And
Speaker 1: I told him no. And then that's when I understood,
Speaker 1: like why people do honor killings. Because his family was
Speaker 1: so mad at me. They were like, you've shamed us,
Speaker 1: You've shamed my son. How well did you know him for?
Speaker 1: He was the boss's son, so I was saw him
Speaker 1: pretty much every day. But I mean, where you weren't dating?
Speaker 1: He just asked you to him. Yeah, we were like
Speaker 1: kind of dating. I was still a virgin. I kind
Speaker 1: of liked him and we kind of hold hands and
Speaker 1: kiss a little bit. Yeah yeah, yeah, but nothing like official.
Speaker 1: But yeah, there's a lot of men that would sit
Speaker 1: around the boar. I agree, and they're like, yeah, once
Speaker 1: a woman turns twenties, she's like less socially desirable his
Speaker 1: hard drip kids. She hits the state. It was like
Speaker 1: a key playboy mansion, like the South version, y'all pussy
Speaker 1: get dried up. You know, that's so young. I look
Speaker 1: back seventeen twenty and they think that. They kept saying
Speaker 1: hit the wall, You've hit the wall. Hit the wall,
Speaker 1: and I was like, what does that even mean? And
Speaker 1: now I'm like thirty two and like the wall's done.
Speaker 1: I broke out of it like the kool aid man. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel great. Yeah, wow. The South. The South has
Speaker 1: uh some interesting and we've we've shipped talked this out before.
Speaker 1: I lived in Chesapeake, Virginia for ten years, and that
Speaker 1: was like, you know, the top of the South. I
Speaker 1: feel like, because there's still Confederate flags in the porches
Speaker 1: and I didn't really get any of it, but the
Speaker 1: South does whenever we talk about it. There are some amazing,
Speaker 1: open minded, forward thinking liberal individuals in the South, but
Speaker 1: there's also a lot of like the fucking racism and
Speaker 1: like the sexism, like that having a group of gentlemen
Speaker 1: talk about how you're washed up after twenty that's fucking
Speaker 1: insane to me, Like that doesn't deserve Like that's crazy
Speaker 1: that that would ever that that's a thought in someone's head. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, were exciting to have you on because
Speaker 1: we haven't had a lot of guests who spent time
Speaker 1: in the South on and I feel like, yeah, we
Speaker 1: are always we do often, especially in New York, Like
Speaker 1: everyone's always like ship talking the South, or like if
Speaker 1: you do an imitation of someone stupid you put on
Speaker 1: a Southern accent. But I mean that must feel shitty
Speaker 1: for someone like you who does have a Southern accent
Speaker 1: but not is progressive and is not by any means unintelligent.
Speaker 1: Can you speak a little bit about what that's like.
Speaker 1: It's like sounded like a being that It's very charming
Speaker 1: my parents. Yeah, I love the South. I think there's
Speaker 1: plenty of smart people in the South. Made people should
Speaker 1: talk Louisiana all the time. But like the scholarship I
Speaker 1: got on, a lot of people were available, like they
Speaker 1: could get it called tops and what ultimately happened it
Speaker 1: was private donors um and it was statewide so people
Speaker 1: they go to college they find their mate, they find
Speaker 1: what they love to do, they get out, they start
Speaker 1: a small business in a family, so it's ultimately better
Speaker 1: for the whole small business of Louisiana. Education. People are
Speaker 1: very smart and uh I remember I was on a
Speaker 1: mod team, which is like a sketch team that you
Speaker 1: see be years ago, and every time they would have
Speaker 1: a dumb character, they gave him a Southern accent. I
Speaker 1: was like, could you please go outside the box a
Speaker 1: little bit there? And they made fun of me and
Speaker 1: I stood my ground. I'll still say my ground. That's
Speaker 1: lazy comedy too. Yeah. Absolutely, like a lot of like
Speaker 1: there's a lot of dumb people up here, so many
Speaker 1: and I I mean, I'm from in the North. Are
Speaker 1: so much scarier to me and like frightening than Hicks
Speaker 1: in the house, because in the South, we all have
Speaker 1: God and poverty, right, that's what unites us. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: and the North it's just like, well New York's about
Speaker 1: twenty minutes from here, so I don't cut your face.
Speaker 1: So yeah, but there's still like Southern accents up here
Speaker 1: and that like the Northern Hick population, and it's like
Speaker 1: it's so interesting to me, especially the racest thing. I
Speaker 1: have been saying this to a few people and they
Speaker 1: kind of don't like hearing it. But I'll say it again.
Speaker 1: I love we love saying things that people don't like
Speaker 1: hearing this podcast. I think New York is even more
Speaker 1: racially segregated than anywhere in the South. Like I had
Speaker 1: black friends growing up, you know, and then I get
Speaker 1: to New York and then everybody's they call, like Phil,
Speaker 1: my black friend, and I'm like, what are you talking about?
Speaker 1: And like the school system is more segregated than anywhere
Speaker 1: in the United States, and New York's city, Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: oh absolutely, And they've talked about all of these like
Speaker 1: to end, like the graduation rates if you integrate schools,
Speaker 1: like you'll have a higher success that's been proven before.
Speaker 1: And then the listen, American Life had a fucking episode
Speaker 1: about that and this these fucking rich white parents, like
Speaker 1: they they they audio recorded the meeting, the like a
Speaker 1: town hall type meeting, and they were so against the
Speaker 1: integration of the schools and like what you people are
Speaker 1: fucking horrible, Like your child should have a real world
Speaker 1: education and experience and everyone, like the whole everyone is
Speaker 1: entitled to an equal education thing. But you're right, it's
Speaker 1: so divided in New York City because Park Avenue UM
Speaker 1: is the richest and the poorest road. Like you can go,
Speaker 1: you travel, there's a documentary on it where you travel
Speaker 1: and Park Avenue in the Upper east Side area is
Speaker 1: one of the richest zip codes in the entire country.
Speaker 1: And then you go up continue at Park Avenue to
Speaker 1: the Bronx and it's one of the poorest zip codes
Speaker 1: in the country. It's one road connecting it. My goodness. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and no one like there's all these studies that proven
Speaker 1: integrading schools is will help people graduate at higher levels
Speaker 1: and nope, yeah, I mean for thirteen years. And like
Speaker 1: living all over from like Williamsburg to Harlem. I mean
Speaker 1: living in Harlem is sometimes like living in just a
Speaker 1: different state or a different country. Like I think there
Speaker 1: is like a different laws there, different customs almost, like
Speaker 1: the way that you buy groceries at a bodega is different.
Speaker 1: And it's just it's really I I love it because
Speaker 1: I feel like it takes me out of this like
Speaker 1: little box that I've been living in. But it's it's weird.
Speaker 1: And there was a time when I first moved there
Speaker 1: when there was really no place to get fresh fruits
Speaker 1: or vegetables, and you know, we talk about food des
Speaker 1: there's a lot. I'm like, this is not a fucking joke.
Speaker 1: I'm like, hi, like yeah, you know. And then white
Speaker 1: people started moving in at Oh, what a surprise. Now
Speaker 1: there's fresh fruits and vegetables. So we look at little
Speaker 1: things like paving when it snows, like paving the road.
Speaker 1: A lot of times, Harlem is the lasting area to
Speaker 1: get the snow taken out of the roads. Like what
Speaker 1: It's just so you're so being so blatantly raced us
Speaker 1: towards these communities that have It's bad. Crazy. I was
Speaker 1: when I was because I was living in South Louisiana
Speaker 1: drink Katrina and that really made me like just distrust
Speaker 1: the government absolutely because we had nothing and it was
Speaker 1: almost two weeks in and water was low, food was low.
Speaker 1: People would come on our property ask for help, you
Speaker 1: know or whatever. And then we always had a gun
Speaker 1: with us, and then these one day, these two dudes
Speaker 1: came up and they were like, uh, we said, how
Speaker 1: can we help you? And they just turned around because
Speaker 1: I'm guessing they ran out of bullets or gun to
Speaker 1: something they want to come sunk us up right, so
Speaker 1: see helicopters and we would just wave, wave, wait, we
Speaker 1: need help, we need food, we need and they just
Speaker 1: kept going, we know you can see us. And then
Speaker 1: I finally turned the TV on after a few weeks
Speaker 1: and they called us all thugs. Yeah, and they said
Speaker 1: rioters And I was like, we're just protecting our home.
Speaker 1: What are you doing calling us thugs because we didn't
Speaker 1: go to to a FEMA camp. So once you go
Speaker 1: to a FEMA camp, you can't leave really because now
Speaker 1: let's say, um, because now it's you're a liability. You
Speaker 1: know what if you even you came back with a
Speaker 1: disease or with drugs or something. So your home has gone,
Speaker 1: your life is gone. Maybe so your whole neighborhood was
Speaker 1: flooded and you couldn't get it. Could you travel anywhere
Speaker 1: by vehicle? Um, well, we live like way out in
Speaker 1: the woods, so it was I think the closest neighbors
Speaker 1: were maybe like a twenty minute walk. But everybody was
Speaker 1: like helping each other out, but just completely called as
Speaker 1: a bunch of sucks that's sucked up because I remember
Speaker 1: Kanye West was went on that rampage of like George
Speaker 1: Bush age black people, which just because of the way
Speaker 1: that that was, they fucking didn't put any there was
Speaker 1: no help. And then the Hurricane Sandy happens, and everyone's
Speaker 1: just like here, would you like an ORDERRV? Like all right, well,
Speaker 1: why don't you do that? Treat everyone equally. That's because
Speaker 1: it affected middle class homes, white homes, yeah, northern homes. Right. No.
Speaker 1: I mean I love when he said George Bush doesn't
Speaker 1: care about black people. I mean because I was like, okay,
Speaker 1: well someone someone needed to say it. Somebody does. That's
Speaker 1: because it's evident in what is happening. It just no
Speaker 1: one had vocalized succinctly, like only Kanye West. So let's
Speaker 1: talk about more sex stuff. When did you start masturbating? Um?
Speaker 1: I was pretty young, how it was? I used to
Speaker 1: masturbate with my mom's good candles. How do you masturbate
Speaker 1: with your mom's good candles? Do you know there's like
Speaker 1: the candles? Yeah? Yeah, you guys put it in a
Speaker 1: perfect an innovator. You just like put it, rub it
Speaker 1: against you, like up in the pussy. That sounds you
Speaker 1: put it up. You put a candle up your pussy,
Speaker 1: put it up. I'm thinking of a I'm thinking of
Speaker 1: like a thick ass pillar kid, like the ones that
Speaker 1: you would put on a dinner a fancy dining room table. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So you masturbated by putting things inside yourself. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: wish I did that. I didn't know about the clitoris
Speaker 1: like what that did until pretty late to college. She
Speaker 1: had internal orgasms as like a young I don't think
Speaker 1: I had orgasms. I was just like, this feels good.
Speaker 1: Would your mom ever be like, Amber, Well, I'm a
Speaker 1: candle smell like pussy. Why is the wig drenched? Did
Speaker 1: she ever find out? No, nobody have found out. They're
Speaker 1: all like broken and wouldn't light, you know, And I'm like,
Speaker 1: what is the what's happened to the candles? This is
Speaker 1: a candle epidemic. When did you start hooking up with dudes? Um?
Speaker 1: I was maybe like a freshman sophomore in college. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: I waited late, but I was like I just gotta
Speaker 1: like sort of give myself on some kind of feet.
Speaker 1: Did you feel any pressure to like get it over with,
Speaker 1: like with the virginity thing a little bit, Yeah, because
Speaker 1: it was a little too. I felt grossed out that
Speaker 1: it was because I was like a kid feminist. That's awesome. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I was like grossed out that um for a woman,
Speaker 1: it was so precious you never lose this. But from man,
Speaker 1: it's like you gotta get it, you gotta go, you know.
Speaker 1: I remember asking my parents. I mean maybe I was
Speaker 1: too young, so they were creeped out by it, but
Speaker 1: I was like like five. Yeah, I was like, so,
Speaker 1: you know, my brothers have had sex, but what if
Speaker 1: I had sex before I'm married? And they were just like,
Speaker 1: we would disown you. Your parents said that yeah, were
Speaker 1: they serious? Yeah? Wow? But wait, so wait, your mom
Speaker 1: seems very like progressive and having a saying but she
Speaker 1: but she still held these views that she was more
Speaker 1: protective over you than the sun. I think. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: she's very protective because she grew up like a Southern
Speaker 1: Baptist minister's daughter in the fifties sixties in Louisiana and
Speaker 1: that was not easy for her. That yeah, that sounds
Speaker 1: a little rough, Like what were the types of obstacles
Speaker 1: that she would have to Like her father, the minister,
Speaker 1: he molested her sisters. My aunt's were I have this
Speaker 1: one aunt, So your grandpa's had a while my grand
Speaker 1: he's dead, thank god, but he's done. God, I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: I know we haven't. Thank God, he's dada here. Um.
Speaker 1: But I have this one aunt who's like crazy, she's
Speaker 1: an alcoholic. And because she was, she was well, she
Speaker 1: was the one that was when they were kids. She
Speaker 1: would be like, Daddy, don't play with Betty, Come have
Speaker 1: sex with me. Oh my gosh. She would, and then
Speaker 1: you could hear her having sex with her the father
Speaker 1: in the next room, and they're like, why is why
Speaker 1: is Barbara just being so like loosened while like why
Speaker 1: don't she just get together like later on in life?
Speaker 1: And because she fucked her father? Yeah, yeah, yeah, Jesus,
Speaker 1: oh my god, how did he did? Anybody did that
Speaker 1: come to life? An No, there's a lot of like
Speaker 1: there's a whole dark web of Southern Baptist preachers. There's
Speaker 1: an infective man just recently my mom's church. He raped
Speaker 1: a twelve year old girl, and nobody wanted to do
Speaker 1: anything about it because the Southern bad is christ they're poor,
Speaker 1: they're humble, they don't want to be on TV, they
Speaker 1: don't want to cause a ruckus. So they were just
Speaker 1: going to let this man still preach there. And my
Speaker 1: mother was like fuck. Yeah. She protested and got the guy,
Speaker 1: got the guy out. Did she say what he did?
Speaker 1: Or yeah, okay, the grandmother who walked in on him.
Speaker 1: She was like on her side and everything. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: how did your mom deal with your her father molesting
Speaker 1: her sister? She was she was very angry with him
Speaker 1: for a long time. That's a part of the reason
Speaker 1: why we left to Sauni Arabia. You really got the
Speaker 1: funk out of there. Christ. She just wanted to get
Speaker 1: out to see the world. And he was also very
Speaker 1: manipulative of her being a woman. He says that she
Speaker 1: wanted to be a performer, and he said, women don't
Speaker 1: do that. You become mother's or you do uh nursing
Speaker 1: or teaching. That's I think that influenced you to become
Speaker 1: a performer because that guy, yeah, yeah, yeah. How long
Speaker 1: did he live? When did he die? He died when
Speaker 1: I was like a freshman in high school. Did you
Speaker 1: even did she even? Was she sad about it? Was
Speaker 1: she happy about it? She was a little weird. It's
Speaker 1: very complicated, a little because there's still her father passed away.
Speaker 1: But she didn't want to um. She didn't want to
Speaker 1: like bash his name. Because it's her own name and
Speaker 1: I have all of these, um his his ministries on
Speaker 1: audio recording, and it's insane. I mean, he was a
Speaker 1: very good preacher despite the fact that he kids. And
Speaker 1: I said, can I use this for my comedy routine?
Speaker 1: And she said not until I die? So you're like,
Speaker 1: all right, sitting on that gold day, I'm really waiting
Speaker 1: to launch this out. Well, the thing is, I was like,
Speaker 1: you seem to say that not casually but pretty like comfortably.
Speaker 1: But is it something so you're okay discussing it, But
Speaker 1: is it discussed openly within your family or is it?
Speaker 1: Um not not really. They sort of take his name
Speaker 1: and they I think this is my mom, my aunt's,
Speaker 1: my mom's sisters. They're very quiet about it. I mean
Speaker 1: they're also badass bitches in their own right. Um, I
Speaker 1: don't think his name is ever even really mentioned. Maybe, yeah,
Speaker 1: they're kids sometimes kind of enjoy them. But I don't
Speaker 1: think some of my cousins never I don't think they
Speaker 1: really know what he did. I think they their mother
Speaker 1: hid that from them. But my mother was open with
Speaker 1: me and we're allowed to interact with him, and that's
Speaker 1: why she was very Uh. Yeah, I was never allowed
Speaker 1: to play with him just as a child. Ye never. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well that's fair. Don't play with grandpa, honey, because he'll
Speaker 1: play with you back in a way that you don't want,
Speaker 1: suck you up. I think one time I was doing
Speaker 1: something and he spanked me. And I was very young,
Speaker 1: and and my mother like quickly like picked me up
Speaker 1: and got me out of there. And then uh, and
Speaker 1: then I looked at him and said, now, why did
Speaker 1: you do that to my grandfather? And he gave her
Speaker 1: a book and it's all I forget what it's called.
Speaker 1: I was reading it recently. It's all about how to
Speaker 1: tame a woman. Oh my god, that's yeah. And it's
Speaker 1: I was rac said, as some babies are born in
Speaker 1: this world screaming, and they're not nice, and they're always
Speaker 1: pushing the envelope, and especially if they're women, you have
Speaker 1: to clip this attitude of rebellion inside of them. Who
Speaker 1: wrote this book? Man? Oh man, man, it's like nineteen
Speaker 1: forties Louisiana child bringing up. That's like long ago. Well,
Speaker 1: you know, it's interesting. A lot of the one of
Speaker 1: an email that's very unfortunately common that we get is
Speaker 1: I was molested and I never told anybody, and but
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, and so people will tell us about
Speaker 1: I mean we've heard some a woman who was raped
Speaker 1: by her father and a lot of her father's friends
Speaker 1: and she got out of it. But I mean, it's
Speaker 1: just so fucking people keep this like secret inside and
Speaker 1: they don't ever tell anybody. But I imagine there's some
Speaker 1: kind of catharticism to talking about it, just to telling people, yeah,
Speaker 1: and just like this is a thing and it's really
Speaker 1: dark and it really sucks, but that's what it is.
Speaker 1: It happened, and this is how we're gonna deal with it.
Speaker 1: Like in Boston, I mean, all of those in Massachusetts,
Speaker 1: the Catholic priests, that whole scandal that was broken the
Speaker 1: and the newspaper I think it was a Boston Globe
Speaker 1: is the one that really like dug in and did
Speaker 1: some investigative journalism and uncovered that. But like it lost
Speaker 1: a lot of priests, a lot of priests because you're
Speaker 1: in a position of power and you're respected by the community,
Speaker 1: and you know you're preaching the Lord's words. So it's
Speaker 1: like what it's kind of like, what better position of
Speaker 1: trust to manipulate for your ways. It's kind of ideal man.
Speaker 1: That ship is dark yea, yeah, yeah, but you gotta
Speaker 1: talk about it else you end up like members of
Speaker 1: my family who are just sort of lost and very Yeah,
Speaker 1: she drinks like a pack of Budweiser every day. Does
Speaker 1: she ever talk about or does she not ever want
Speaker 1: like if you brought it up, would she like kind
Speaker 1: of have an anxiety attack or it's a good question.
Speaker 1: I never really bring it up around her. I think
Speaker 1: I brought up once and then she just spit That
Speaker 1: makes sense that that that's a great but some metaphorical
Speaker 1: reaction as Fields get that. Yeah, you know, have any
Speaker 1: of these experiences you feel like they've they're reflected in
Speaker 1: your stand up or are these things that you're talking about,
Speaker 1: cause I know you you do talk about like I've
Speaker 1: heard jokes where you talk about like women's bodies and
Speaker 1: but your your comedy is so interesting and unique that yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just like it's it timelights the way like I
Speaker 1: love your ex joke about how things are marketed to
Speaker 1: men versus men and stuff, And it seems like people
Speaker 1: were trying to like in your area and maybe not
Speaker 1: specifically towards you, but towards like the women in your
Speaker 1: community trying to like, you know, put you down in
Speaker 1: a box and like not have you fly away, And
Speaker 1: that would make me want to fly away fucking thousands
Speaker 1: times more. Absolutely, I think there is something in uh
Speaker 1: in the community I was raised, and well, my mother
Speaker 1: was very much like in appended thinker, you know, so
Speaker 1: I think that's another reason how I got out. But
Speaker 1: it was very much um. You take ship and you
Speaker 1: eat it and you're humble about it, and you don't
Speaker 1: ask for more, and you just find the nicest man
Speaker 1: you can and he will protect you because the world
Speaker 1: is a big scary place and if you were to
Speaker 1: go out there on your own, it's just going to
Speaker 1: rape you and rape brepe brepe, braape break. I'll take
Speaker 1: my chances. You know, your mom know you've had sex
Speaker 1: before marriage. I told her once and she called everybody
Speaker 1: in the family and told them, yeah, how old were you?
Speaker 1: I was, you know the think in college. First couple
Speaker 1: of years in college, I told her, we haven't like
Speaker 1: a heart to heart. One day she told me that
Speaker 1: was the first time she told me about her father
Speaker 1: molesting her. That's a big She kept it that long.
Speaker 1: She kept it that long, and then I told her that, oh,
Speaker 1: I've I've had sex because I thought we were just
Speaker 1: like opening up. And then she didn't like that and
Speaker 1: then called everybody. What did she say to him? Had
Speaker 1: opened that? Did she not know what to do with herself?
Speaker 1: Was she beside herself? She was calling a family members
Speaker 1: that I haven't spoken twenty years, you know, like uncle's
Speaker 1: did she tell you she called these people? Or brother
Speaker 1: called me and he said, Amber, your mom our mom
Speaker 1: just called me and said, uh, you have said you've
Speaker 1: had sex? And I was like, Hi, Mom, haven't spoken
Speaker 1: to you in about a year. You know, Wow, how
Speaker 1: did that make you feel? That would piss me off.
Speaker 1: She's like a weird lady because she's forward thinking in
Speaker 1: a lot of ways, but also very traditional in other ways. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's hard to get your mind around. She's very I
Speaker 1: think she has UM what do we call it, a
Speaker 1: history history on X personality disorder. That's where you like
Speaker 1: have to have a lot of attention at all times
Speaker 1: and if you don't then you freak out. So I
Speaker 1: think this is another way for her to get attention.
Speaker 1: Oh she diagnosed with that. I've never even heard of
Speaker 1: that term. Well, we've always thought often that she was
Speaker 1: like bipolar or something, but bipolar means you really do
Speaker 1: have a shift in your body. I think she just
Speaker 1: has the shift to get attention. Well I wonder if
Speaker 1: because my mom was diagnosed by pollar and then they're like, wait, no,
Speaker 1: you just have brain seizures. But when I told my
Speaker 1: mom I first had sex, she kind of coursed it
Speaker 1: out of me a little bit. She was kind of like, well,
Speaker 1: you haven't done that, have you? And I didn't line.
Speaker 1: I was like, well, I mean and then she we
Speaker 1: were in a restaurant, she left the restaurant, she made
Speaker 1: my dad pick me up. I'm like, fucking kidding me.
Speaker 1: Granted I was fifteen, very young, but it was with
Speaker 1: my boyfriend. I mean, you know whatever, he was older.
Speaker 1: Uh he was like nineteen. That could be illegal totally.
Speaker 1: It was illegal. But my parents are nine years apart,
Speaker 1: so that wasn't the part they cared about because they
Speaker 1: were like, well, he's whatever. Um, but my mom great
Speaker 1: the funk out. I mean, I can't imagine having a
Speaker 1: daughter and her telling you she's had sex. Because we
Speaker 1: had a daughter, you wanted to like, I don't know,
Speaker 1: I guess you do want to protect her. But that's
Speaker 1: that's the thing. That's what we have to get rid of,
Speaker 1: the notion to protect daughters and not sons, like b
Speaker 1: is equally loving and protective over both your kids, because
Speaker 1: I get that, like me, so it's just just let
Speaker 1: your kids do do their fucking thing. That's why I
Speaker 1: can't have that. I would just be so nervous all
Speaker 1: the time. I would be so nervous all the time.
Speaker 1: And I'm not even would year, but I just would.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I would just always think out that
Speaker 1: this is the day that they die, every time that
Speaker 1: they leave the house. I would just be so self
Speaker 1: aware of the fact that if I'm being over productive
Speaker 1: or overbearing because that man, that really because you take toll. Yeah,
Speaker 1: my mom didn't have the liberal portion of her personality
Speaker 1: at all. She was just don't have sex, don't don't
Speaker 1: do drugs, don't blah blah blah. And she was depressed.
Speaker 1: So I would used to tell her to tell her.
Speaker 1: I'm like, um, I'm never gonna do drugs. And in
Speaker 1: high school, I never smoked weed or cigarettes, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm never going to smoke weed. And then I got
Speaker 1: into college and like, I'm never gonna do coke. And
Speaker 1: then I got after college and I went to Heroin.
Speaker 1: But my mom will get so disappointed because she would
Speaker 1: hold me to those promises that I made, knowing that
Speaker 1: like I was fifteen when I told her I was
Speaker 1: gonna smoke weed. Ship changes when you're twenty one and
Speaker 1: twenty two, what do you know? And also they grew
Speaker 1: up in a different time period. Yeah, well great, Well
Speaker 1: maybe the sixties seventies it was a little more lucy
Speaker 1: goosey drugs. But my parents didn't partake in that ship. No,
Speaker 1: my mom got married and met my dad when when
Speaker 1: she was eighteen, got married at nineteen, had my brother
Speaker 1: and then yeah, oh my gosh, she stay at home mom.
Speaker 1: Yeah she always was. Yeah, good for her, but she's
Speaker 1: so overprotective. Of course, so that you're world, you're a baby.
Speaker 1: I don't want to be anybody's world. Is that my
Speaker 1: own person? And I'm Sam. That's nice though, because you
Speaker 1: can call your mother she'll answer, she will. Sometimes I'll
Speaker 1: call my mother, I won't get a phone call back
Speaker 1: for like another week. Yeah, once you call you back.
Speaker 1: What busy she's a teacher, Yeah, she's busy. Um, middle
Speaker 1: school theater. Oh that's fun in Mississippi? She does she
Speaker 1: like that you're doing stand up I we talked about
Speaker 1: this recently. I don't think I think she likes that
Speaker 1: I'm out and then I'm performing and then I'm happy.
Speaker 1: But I don't think she really gets the stand Depp thing.
Speaker 1: I know it was even did you when you were
Speaker 1: a little girl, little girl, did you know that, like
Speaker 1: stand up comedian was an occupation that you could have.
Speaker 1: I had no idea And the only time I ever
Speaker 1: saw it was men, and I thought that was like, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Jeff Foxworthy was the first I had his cassette tapes. Yea,
Speaker 1: I fucking loved him. I loved it. I didn't even
Speaker 1: know that was a thing I could even do, or like,
Speaker 1: how do you do that? Nicky Blazer was selling. Karin
Speaker 1: was like the first example when she did that documentary
Speaker 1: years ago. I was like, oh, yeah, like a young
Speaker 1: cute girl can be a stand up Wow, that's good
Speaker 1: to know. Like she was the first example I had
Speaker 1: of that. That's great. Yeah, you know, if you don't,
Speaker 1: if you weren't given these examples, and how do you
Speaker 1: even know that it exists so that you could even
Speaker 1: do it? Absolutely? And so you start and you started.
Speaker 1: So you started in theater and your major was theater
Speaker 1: in college. And then so how did you make the tree?
Speaker 1: I know, well, I know you still you still act
Speaker 1: and perform and you're still at UCB. But then how
Speaker 1: did you make the transition into also doing stand up
Speaker 1: board and that? When did that happen? Or what bad
Speaker 1: thing happened to you? Yeah? Where did everything go wrong? Oh? God?
Speaker 1: So many? Well, I would say, I came to New
Speaker 1: York to do theater, and um I was also I
Speaker 1: really liked improv, so I was doing stuff at UCB.
Speaker 1: I was a cocktail waitress and that's how I paid
Speaker 1: my way. And then I didn't like that, um I
Speaker 1: couldn't write my own thing, and that a lot of
Speaker 1: roles for women was based on your hair color. It
Speaker 1: really was. I mean, granted I was getting shitty rolls,
Speaker 1: but it was like Sandra Redhead, I mean, and like
Speaker 1: that was it. And I got cast in this one
Speaker 1: film and I shot in Jersey and the guy, the director,
Speaker 1: who had never done film before, never any theater, nothing,
Speaker 1: he was just a what wall Street guy? This? Yeah,
Speaker 1: he was a wallster guy. He took a seventh pay.
Speaker 1: He wanted to make a movie, and he brought me
Speaker 1: one day, he brought me to a motel six. He
Speaker 1: ordered some pizza and he said get on the bed
Speaker 1: and don't do some improvises with me. And I was
Speaker 1: like no, uh and then he called you. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: called me fat and he fired me right there and
Speaker 1: there see he would you wouldn't have sex. M So
Speaker 1: he called you fat and told Julie good insult because
Speaker 1: it doesn't even work for you. What do you how
Speaker 1: did you feel that would that would have? Because I'm
Speaker 1: just now recently under realizing that people are horrible, like
Speaker 1: people can be horrible because to me, like everyone's great
Speaker 1: until they proved me wrong, and then I'm really bummed
Speaker 1: out that their ship heads. But that would infuriate me
Speaker 1: so hard. I didn't know what to do. He left
Speaker 1: the hotel room and I was just stuck alone in Jersey.
Speaker 1: I didn't have a car, like that was my main
Speaker 1: concern it M. I just kind of sat there in
Speaker 1: this hotel room. I was like, what do I want
Speaker 1: to do? Why am I doing this? Why am I
Speaker 1: like relying my happiness? Why am I putting it in
Speaker 1: the hands of these dudes that don't give no fuss
Speaker 1: about me? Why am I doing? Has it had any
Speaker 1: other incidences like that occurred to you? Or I do?
Speaker 1: Was just a huge shiphead? Yeah, just a feud. Not
Speaker 1: as bad as that, but that was just like, you
Speaker 1: know what, I gotta put my gotta make my own
Speaker 1: life here. That was a cinematic moment. Why I am
Speaker 1: are starting to stand up? That's kind of a great
Speaker 1: That's a very empowering story in a way though, because
Speaker 1: it's just like, because that is what stand up is
Speaker 1: is you have an idea or a concept that you
Speaker 1: want to share and you can pretty much immediately bring
Speaker 1: it to the stage. I mean sometimes it's way too soon,
Speaker 1: but you know everybody and like how did how did
Speaker 1: you kind of create the onstage persona that you have?
Speaker 1: Because it's really unlike anything I've seen. I know, I'm
Speaker 1: sure people compare you to Maria Bamford a lot, But
Speaker 1: other than that, I mean, who do you get your you?
Speaker 1: Which is great? You get a lot of comparisons, and
Speaker 1: I did Gilbert Godfree last night? Stick or treat you
Speaker 1: have to like be the other comment? That was a
Speaker 1: lot of funks. It's just dirty one liners, you know. Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I just kind of kept doing it.
Speaker 1: I find that a lot of managers and agents, like
Speaker 1: the gatekeepers in this world, they like like me, okay,
Speaker 1: but they sort of look at me like, um, like
Speaker 1: this weird little feral child. It's like what do we
Speaker 1: do with you? And kind of like please leave us alone,
Speaker 1: like please go you know, Yeah, yeah, um, I always
Speaker 1: forget this. But you dated Frank Karns. Yeah, I don't know,
Speaker 1: do I do? I don't. I don't know how much
Speaker 1: you know. But like this podcast was started, Frank Frank
Speaker 1: Dumpter and I had like a nervous breakdown that lasted
Speaker 1: quite a long time. Yeah, and then this podcast came
Speaker 1: out of that through the heartache and the tears came. Guys,
Speaker 1: we fucked. You didn't know that. I didn't know that
Speaker 1: because I know she's done bits about Frank on stage,
Speaker 1: like especially heard bits about him. I just didn't know
Speaker 1: if you knew who was about by like any breakup
Speaker 1: interial you've ever heard, it is about Frank. You didn't know.
Speaker 1: I didn't know I broke his heart. Surprise. I did
Speaker 1: know that because I believe I dated him right after
Speaker 1: you dated him, So I there was he had a
Speaker 1: lot of trust issues with me. It's all you know,
Speaker 1: you know, it all ends it out. But also people
Speaker 1: need to realize, like when you date somebody and then
Speaker 1: you did another person that's a different person like that,
Speaker 1: it doesn't carry over. How did you break his heart? Oh?
Speaker 1: I wrote, I sat down one day on my computer
Speaker 1: and I wrote a pros and cons list about him,
Speaker 1: and then I left it open and I went and
Speaker 1: took a shower and he saw. He saw the pros
Speaker 1: and contr I was like, oh, I love making list
Speaker 1: too great. Way did you write it? He did tell
Speaker 1: me that, Yeah, Oh my god. I didn't remember until
Speaker 1: just now. It wasn't like something I like think every
Speaker 1: time I see him, But I didn't. I didn't remember
Speaker 1: what was he there while you wrote it? No, he
Speaker 1: was out and I was something. It was just up. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, wasn't your wasn't your computer asleep by the
Speaker 1: time on the shower? I think it was? Yeah. Snooping involved, Yeah,
Speaker 1: every Honestly, every time i've snooped, i've found something. I'm like, oh, okay,
Speaker 1: we shouldn't all right. Yeah, I'm good to know. Why
Speaker 1: did you want to break up with him? Or did
Speaker 1: you were you just truly in a crossroads of like,
Speaker 1: what's the better choice? I don't know, I was at
Speaker 1: a cross roads. Wasn't better choice? I called him a
Speaker 1: doormat in the in the in the con con he
Speaker 1: saw it, and then he went on tumbling that night
Speaker 1: and started posting pitches of doormats. Yeah, so mean. I
Speaker 1: mean that wasn't meant for his eyes. So you know
Speaker 1: it was honest on your party. You seem like you
Speaker 1: still honestly feel bad about it, which was is very sweet,
Speaker 1: But I mean that I feel bad. I cheated on
Speaker 1: a boyfriend once. I told him right away because I
Speaker 1: couldn't live with it. But then I lied to him
Speaker 1: and I said I only kissed them, but I really
Speaker 1: had sex with a person. And then when I interviewed
Speaker 1: him on the podcast, his name is Darren fucking awesome dude,
Speaker 1: such as the sweetest guy, and I was like, remember
Speaker 1: when I told you that I only um made out
Speaker 1: with that guys like, yeah, I did more, and he
Speaker 1: was I was like, I'm sorry, I don't mean that.
Speaker 1: We hadn't talked in years except for on the podcast.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. He's like, well, if you would have
Speaker 1: told me that back then, I wouldn't have stayed with you,
Speaker 1: So she were together for like two more years after that.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. It's interesting how things can like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I can hurt for so long and even after you've
Speaker 1: moved on, and especially the comedy community is so incestuous.
Speaker 1: Like there was a time I remember when I was
Speaker 1: first staying Freak and I was just like, I go
Speaker 1: into every room, I have to see someone you dated,
Speaker 1: like and now I think co host guys be fucked
Speaker 1: and like literally, I mean like there's you know, any
Speaker 1: any given lineup, I've had sex with somebody who knows
Speaker 1: the rough breakup. So I was really making up the
Speaker 1: lost time. I'm in a relationship now, but I've fucked
Speaker 1: a lot of comics. I'm almost like glad I got
Speaker 1: a boyfriend. Right as I started stand up. I would
Speaker 1: bang everyone because I'm like, you're funny, what are you
Speaker 1: like in bed? Nice? I just want to know, you
Speaker 1: know what. I found that the dudes, because I would
Speaker 1: always find dudes who were cool about it, because I
Speaker 1: would say, like, don't tell people, and I'll keep saying,
Speaker 1: you know, they would tell like some of their like
Speaker 1: women friends, and the women would be the ones that
Speaker 1: spread the rumors. Yeah, it was rumors about like about
Speaker 1: like who I fucked, like, don't trust her? It was women,
Speaker 1: don't trust don't trust you because it's doing anything because
Speaker 1: you think sex with people I know, Well, these are
Speaker 1: also just not good ladies. Yeah, well it's it sucks
Speaker 1: because when women are shitty to each other, which unfortunately
Speaker 1: happens more than it should just happens in general and
Speaker 1: it shouldn't. But like they're really means really means can
Speaker 1: be mean, It's gonna be nice. I had like two
Speaker 1: years of my life ruined by another woman. Why she
Speaker 1: just mean to me? What did she because sexual? Something
Speaker 1: in your sexual past? Sexual past were like with like
Speaker 1: fine things like when my dad died. She was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, who's going to pay for your cell
Speaker 1: phone bill? What? Yes? Does she even know you? Like
Speaker 1: were you ever friends with this person? Kind of like
Speaker 1: she was around you know, so God, Yeah, that's a rude.
Speaker 1: And it took it took me a while to understand.
Speaker 1: Like when people are assholes a lot of times, it's
Speaker 1: just they're projecting something like their own insecurity onto another person.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you're an easy target. And now that I
Speaker 1: know that, I can see it very clearly when people
Speaker 1: are doing that now that we're adults, but when you're younger,
Speaker 1: you're just like me. Oh, I was bullied and I
Speaker 1: cried and cried in middle school in high schools are
Speaker 1: you are you still in the same are you nick?
Speaker 1: Is that? I was like, I was like, I'm not sure,
Speaker 1: cause you've been eating each other for a while, right, yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe like three or four years. Do you live together? No,
Speaker 1: we live Have you ever? Have you ever lived with
Speaker 1: a man? I've never lived with a man. Isn't it
Speaker 1: like what do you live? I have a whole bit
Speaker 1: about this, but like it's so interesting to be living
Speaker 1: with someone romantically because you see a part of someone's
Speaker 1: life so much closer than you would see a roommate.
Speaker 1: Part of a roommate like the clipping the toe nails
Speaker 1: or just a little things that we as humans do
Speaker 1: we have to do. But you really have a front
Speaker 1: row seat. And I'm like a little bit messy, likeways
Speaker 1: like coffee cups laying around and like you know, you bad,
Speaker 1: bad bitch and I don't think that what you know?
Speaker 1: I've got to clean up my act literally, So do
Speaker 1: you have a you have a roommate that you live
Speaker 1: with roommates. Yeah, but my rent is so cheap, so
Speaker 1: if I were to live with him, i'd be paying double.
Speaker 1: So it's just like, I'll just go stay with your
Speaker 1: nice with you, you know, and he's we're also both
Speaker 1: out of town quite often. Has it ever been discussed
Speaker 1: or something that you've talked about a little bit. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we talked moving moving together to n l A or something. Yeah. Okay,
Speaker 1: have you ever been in an open relationship or relationship
Speaker 1: that you could be like monogamsh No, but that has
Speaker 1: fascinated me because you know, I just like Dick. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I love Dick right and kind, and sometimes I want
Speaker 1: other dicks just because the fact that, like, it's not
Speaker 1: the dick that I'm used to. It doesn't even matter
Speaker 1: if it's better or worse. I don't even care. That's
Speaker 1: at the point. Yeah, I don't love that dick. I
Speaker 1: love your dick. I just want to try the dicks.
Speaker 1: See how that did work. Yeah, but I don't think
Speaker 1: he would be into that at all. Yeah, So I
Speaker 1: just you know, cough it down and hopefully I don't
Speaker 1: get too drunk and cheata. Have you ever had that
Speaker 1: discussion with him, because I've preached it with Stephen and
Speaker 1: he's told me that, you know, because we have three ways,
Speaker 1: that's like the adventurous thing we do now. Yeah, not
Speaker 1: not a time. We've had two so far, and um,
Speaker 1: and it's really fun. But I kind of want, like,
Speaker 1: it's nice to chase dick. It's just the chasing the
Speaker 1: dick and getting it. I don't even care what head
Speaker 1: is attached to that dick. It's just that in and
Speaker 1: of itself is like a confidence booster for me. And
Speaker 1: I feel like it would add it would add like
Speaker 1: a nice layer to the relationship. But maybe not. I
Speaker 1: don't know. I don't know. He's a pretty monogamous dude. Yeah, so,
Speaker 1: and he's pretty old fashioned, which I like. Sweet. Yeah.
Speaker 1: The reason why I liked him because he's just very nice.
Speaker 1: Kind hurt him right, right? So have you have you
Speaker 1: ever cheated on somebody? No? No, no, no. I usually
Speaker 1: just broke up with him before I even had That's
Speaker 1: like my theory too. I'm just like, if unless it's
Speaker 1: just something where you do, like make a drunk mistake,
Speaker 1: like I can't imagine like planning, it seems honestly just
Speaker 1: like too much work for me and then I would
Speaker 1: feel weird about covering it up. Yeah, that's the one
Speaker 1: time I cheated on the boyfriend. I felt so bad.
Speaker 1: I have to tell him right now. Like I called
Speaker 1: him like early that next morning. I was just like
Speaker 1: screamed it and he's like, Okay, we'll talk about it.
Speaker 1: Like I'm sorry, I'm horrible. But the thing is, like
Speaker 1: I listened to Dan Savages podcast all the time, and
Speaker 1: I talked about him a lot on here, and he's
Speaker 1: all he always says, he's like most couple cheating will
Speaker 1: happen to most people, Like you will get cheated on,
Speaker 1: maybe you'll never know, or you will cheat on somebody,
Speaker 1: maybe you'll never tell them. But like it's something that happens.
Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be a make or break. It
Speaker 1: doesn't have to be a deal breaker, because there's so
Speaker 1: many reasons why people cheat. It could just be for
Speaker 1: the fact that, like I want to know what it's
Speaker 1: like to chase some dick. Yeah, And that's it has
Speaker 1: nothing to do with who the person is and who
Speaker 1: how I think about your partner. And that's so interesting
Speaker 1: to me because I always thought like if someone ever
Speaker 1: cheated on me, and they have before, I like I
Speaker 1: like throws my world upside down and like almost causes
Speaker 1: me an identity crisis. But now I have this whole
Speaker 1: new feeling on it. I'm like, I think you've stayed
Speaker 1: and cheated on me. I'd probably be like, that's okay,
Speaker 1: Like let's talk about like why it happened, And yeah,
Speaker 1: you talked about because you you originally want to be like, well,
Speaker 1: I don't have a good enough pussy, my personality sucks.
Speaker 1: And then you know you just wanted to slip it
Speaker 1: in another another girl's pocket. Maybe the key is it,
Speaker 1: Like yeah, even with cheating, like it's just not about you, really,
Speaker 1: that's that's not that's the answer to a lot of
Speaker 1: questions and a lot of like feelings that people feel. Now,
Speaker 1: how for as far as like weird section, what are
Speaker 1: you into weird sex shit? I mean I would hope
Speaker 1: that you are, just because that's how I painted a
Speaker 1: picture of you in my head. But I don't say yeah, same, same, same.
Speaker 1: When I'm down to try anything I've never tried but stuff,
Speaker 1: And that's the one because really I have hemorrhoids that'll
Speaker 1: get in the way. Yeah, that's why I was there
Speaker 1: because of anal and because hemorrhoids, and I was like, wow,
Speaker 1: that's stupid. I kind of ruined it for me. So
Speaker 1: I'm like scared to do it again. But but stuff
Speaker 1: is cool. Yeah, but the hemorrhoid thing? Does do you
Speaker 1: do you? Wait? Hemorrhoids? I felt like they go away
Speaker 1: though you just always have them. I'm very curious. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I just have them. I try to get them out,
Speaker 1: but you know, I don't go. They're just there. You know.
Speaker 1: I think I can get burn because I was like,
Speaker 1: we're a gay friend, So do you actually know that
Speaker 1: someone had them burned off? Really? And then how else
Speaker 1: are you gonna go? Like cream burn or freezing? Is
Speaker 1: the horrible? Alad have a hemorrhoid And the fact that
Speaker 1: we gotta burn it or freeze it off? What the fun?
Speaker 1: Like it would be more comfortable than burning. Have you
Speaker 1: done either? No? I just live with it. I feel
Speaker 1: like that's not excruciating for you. Well, it's excruciating like
Speaker 1: when I eat, Like if I were to eat really
Speaker 1: really bad, because then digesting it is not a party,
Speaker 1: and I would bleed like I bleed them internally. I
Speaker 1: haven't actually had them in a in a second, which
Speaker 1: I just realized, Um, but yeah, I would always bleed
Speaker 1: like I had a period. It sucks, it's bad, it hurts. Yeah,
Speaker 1: hemroid's on the sex podcast, so sexy it happens. I
Speaker 1: love that though, because I think I think a lot
Speaker 1: of times people don't get things treated because they're not
Speaker 1: only so embarrassed that they can't tell a friend, they
Speaker 1: are so embarrassed that they can't tell their own doctor.
Speaker 1: It's like, you can't tell your doctor about something medical
Speaker 1: that's happening with your body. Like, wow, and hemorroids. That's
Speaker 1: the nastiest one I got him. I hope that you say,
Speaker 1: what's the freakiest sex thing that you've done? Oh? Yeah,
Speaker 1: have sex um sex with a stranger and an elevator.
Speaker 1: That's fun. Did you meet him in the elevator? I
Speaker 1: met him like just before going up there, and it
Speaker 1: was like it was like a little bit tipsy and
Speaker 1: I was young. I was like, this guy's really cute.
Speaker 1: We started like flirting, and then he's pulled the elevator
Speaker 1: stopped it, and I just started sucking. That's so cool. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it was great. And then like somebody the elevator started
Speaker 1: going again and something opened and I heard somebody goes,
Speaker 1: I'll catch the next one. That's right, you smell sex? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that was so much fun. Instance, did you have an
Speaker 1: exchange names or was it like this true like mystery,
Speaker 1: Dahlia mystery, I want to do that. Yeah, it was great.
Speaker 1: It sounds fun, but I was I was like very
Speaker 1: young and sweet, and I often wondered, like I gelts
Speaker 1: sad and I look in the mirror sometimes and I'm like,
Speaker 1: am I too? Like do people consider me too old
Speaker 1: for anything? Fun like that? You know you're young, you're
Speaker 1: a young woman. Brain. Do you ever have periods with
Speaker 1: your boyfriend or any period of boyfriends in the past
Speaker 1: where you like there is a lull and you're like,
Speaker 1: this is getting pretty boring. Actually, yeah, what do you do?
Speaker 1: Like I feel like I almost feel like I'm in
Speaker 1: the midst of it, Like my my horny nous level
Speaker 1: has kind of gone down over the past couple of months.
Speaker 1: I'm like, what the fun Christina. It's one of those
Speaker 1: things where like you're having a bad day, so you
Speaker 1: force yourself to smile, you know, just get on top
Speaker 1: one day. I do, and I never regret it. I
Speaker 1: never regret it. But it it takes it's taken more
Speaker 1: to get over that hump of like, I mean, there's
Speaker 1: still a lot plenty of times when I'm like, I
Speaker 1: want to funk. We're gonna funk when we get homzon, Okay.
Speaker 1: And then but then I'm like, I feel like I'm
Speaker 1: saying no to him, more like he never says no
Speaker 1: to me, and I'm always I feel like I'm constantly
Speaker 1: saying no. I feel like a piece of ship corner
Speaker 1: in my earlier twenties. I mean, I can still get there.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just I think we're getting, you know, tired.
Speaker 1: But I thought when you get older, when you're when
Speaker 1: that's not the time. I thought it was thirties. I
Speaker 1: think it's like forties. I mean that's why I am
Speaker 1: at or like I miss those robins and those aren't
Speaker 1: people thirties or forties, forties, fifties. I can't wait. So
Speaker 1: when you're when you're kind of experiencing like a right,
Speaker 1: you just like get on top of that dick. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I just get on top. Just go for it, or
Speaker 1: like push him in the bedroom, you know, just do it. Okay, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it helps things. Do you ever watch porn with the
Speaker 1: boyfram I haven't, no, but I have like masturbated in
Speaker 1: front of him. I love mutual masturbation, I think because
Speaker 1: I like watching semen come out of a penis specifically
Speaker 1: the person i'm sucking, not just like I don't because
Speaker 1: I don't like that porn. It's okay, but I really
Speaker 1: love when guys like grabbing his dick. I'm like, what
Speaker 1: a manly sight. Yeah, it's like a water balloon. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was masturbating in front of my boyfriend. But then
Speaker 1: I feel bad that, Like I wonder if he feels
Speaker 1: like he's not as involved, or like he masturbate while
Speaker 1: you're masturbating. Oh, it's just you. He usually finishes early
Speaker 1: and I'm still ready to go, right, so I'll start masturbating,
Speaker 1: and then I often wonder like does he feel less appreciated? Huh,
Speaker 1: could he get does he get hard again? Or no,
Speaker 1: he's just like one and he's out of usually one
Speaker 1: and done. Yeah I could be like that too. Sometimes
Speaker 1: it's just like, yeah, I'm just continue rubbing one out.
Speaker 1: But my boyfriend's always like, you want more? Do you
Speaker 1: want more? I'm like no, I feel like I should,
Speaker 1: I guess by how insistent you are. But I don't nice.
Speaker 1: I had sex in the woods one time and the
Speaker 1: park and I looked up and somebody was taking photos
Speaker 1: of me. So somewhere on the internet there's a picture
Speaker 1: of me laid out on a blanket is having sex
Speaker 1: with Was it daytime or ninetime? Daytime? Did you say like, hey,
Speaker 1: mr stop, No, I think he's kept killing I think
Speaker 1: a lot of times in the podcast we talk about
Speaker 1: like kind of it's how it's interesting to be a woman,
Speaker 1: especially in New York, because there will be a time
Speaker 1: when you will be offered money or something, much like
Speaker 1: that motel instance, to do something that you're like, this
Speaker 1: is questionable, but I can makes so much money and
Speaker 1: it's so easy. Have you ever had any experiences like
Speaker 1: that while living the city or elsewhere? Um, let's see.
Speaker 1: I definitely remember, like being so broken going on craigslist.
Speaker 1: But I think being raised so religious, I always had
Speaker 1: this guilt of accepting any kind of money for it.
Speaker 1: Where now like with my brain set now, I wish
Speaker 1: I could go back in time and be twenty four
Speaker 1: and just like funk all these dene for money. I mean,
Speaker 1: cocktail waitress is pretty much that, but with my clothes on,
Speaker 1: you give them like the sexual look. You know, you
Speaker 1: talked to him like your own special boy, making a
Speaker 1: guy feel special, like yeah, you'll give you tips you
Speaker 1: so well, yeah, so's everything, but the sex with that.
Speaker 1: But I just I was always so um, I don't know,
Speaker 1: I had so much guilt where you propositioned as a
Speaker 1: cocktail waitress. I'm sure I don't. I don't really remember.
Speaker 1: Maybe I was, but I was also still pretty naive,
Speaker 1: so you didn't even like because no one actually was like, hey,
Speaker 1: do you want to fuck? And sometimes like yeah, you
Speaker 1: don't even know, like as that person trying to have
Speaker 1: sex with me, I don't even know what are we
Speaker 1: doing to that? Always, um, well, thank you so much
Speaker 1: for coming on the podcast. Than we had a whole
Speaker 1: whirlwind of a journey. We did Ophelia, Saudi Arabia, we travel,
Speaker 1: we traveled the world. It was sad, some of it
Speaker 1: was happy. Um, where can we find you online? And
Speaker 1: do you have any cool things coming up that you
Speaker 1: want to promote? Yeah, I've got a couple out of
Speaker 1: town gigs in a couple of weeks. They're on my Twitter,
Speaker 1: Amber Smelson on Twitter because my name's Amber Nel. Simpatha
Speaker 1: started to take us a saber Smelson and then I'll
Speaker 1: like plug all my shows and have stuff on there. Awesome. Perfect,
Speaker 1: So catch out Amber out and if you're in New York,
Speaker 1: she's performing all the time. Thank you so much for
Speaker 1: listening to you. Guys. We fucked the anti slut Chiming podcast.
Speaker 1: We'll talk to you next Friday. Everyous things at some
Speaker 1: point in one's m for example, Polly paint or that
Speaker 1: the two of your first wife. But don't you are
Speaker 1: pretty head. Everything's okay, it's excusable behavior. At least that's
Speaker 1: what they say. They say you're allowed to to stupid
Speaker 1: things when you're young. People of the other way, it's
Speaker 1: a cap at least that's what people say. You're allowed
Speaker 1: to tramp up, you're allowed to get shot, you're allowed
Speaker 1: to tell anything once because they're young. Yeah you're young. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're young, So why you went off like the ladle
Speaker 1: case when they're walking home from school. But do they
Speaker 1: know ten years they'll be peeing in a stranger's ball.
Speaker 1: You're allowed to do anything when you're young. You could
Speaker 1: go gay for a date. It's okay because you're young,
Speaker 1: but you also probably gay. You can follow in the streets,
Speaker 1: you can eat fanny treats, You can make out with
Speaker 1: fifteen people on the back fold because they're young. Do that?
Speaker 1: So who can say poo foo? And will we do?
Speaker 1: Because we're the youth, we don't follows. Do you think
Speaker 1: we know that we're acting lacking? All misters oh,