Speaker 1: One eight hundred d ui away now offering free remote
Speaker 1: consultations by phone or video conference for any criminal offense.
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Speaker 1: consultation from Bradley Johnson Lawyers. Visit one eight hundred d
Speaker 1: Uyowa dot com or call for a man. Getting your
Speaker 1: first colonoscopy is either the most terrifying or thrilling experience
Speaker 1: of your life, especially when it's performed by a non
Speaker 1: medical professional. Oh but that's my personal experience, and I digress,
Speaker 1: because today we call one dude who's scheduled to have
Speaker 1: his area inspected for the first time. Lucky guy and
Speaker 1: his wife told us he's very nervous about it, but
Speaker 1: he's about to get a whole lot more nervous when
Speaker 1: he hears what the doctor has planned. It's in your
Speaker 1: phone tap right now on the twenties. Hello. All right,
Speaker 1: this is Adrian calling from doctor's office. Is this Matthew?
Speaker 1: It is, I'm Matthew. So I'm just confirming your appointment.
Speaker 1: You're having a colonos could be done with us tomorrow
Speaker 1: at three pm. That's correct, Yes, great, okay. Oh and
Speaker 1: I see on your profile here that you're an organ donor.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, okay, actually my wife encourage who just change that? Excellent?
Speaker 1: So yeah, I just want to tell you a few
Speaker 1: things about the procedure. You know, the anesthesiologists will be
Speaker 1: putting you under beforehand, right yep, and in the event
Speaker 1: of any unforeseen complications, will make sure that your organs
Speaker 1: go to someone who really needs them. M Wait, do
Speaker 1: things you really go bad? No? I mean not usually.
Speaker 1: It's just that with any procedure, we always tell the patients,
Speaker 1: you know, just in case the worst happens, this is
Speaker 1: what we're gonna do. So anyway, while you're under, are
Speaker 1: there any non essential organs that you don't want to
Speaker 1: part with? What? No? Any like, any organs that you
Speaker 1: wouldn't miss right now that we could just have? Uh no,
Speaker 1: I think I'd miss all of them. Are you sure? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm just coming in for a routine colonoscopy. Well yeah,
Speaker 1: but I'm just saying a lot of people think that
Speaker 1: you need to wait until you're dead to donate your organs.
Speaker 1: But that's not the case anymore. Wait, like d the
Speaker 1: advancements that they've made in science, it's crazy. I could
Speaker 1: take out two or three things right now, and you
Speaker 1: wouldn't miss them. Are you joking right now? No, it's incredible.
Speaker 1: I mean technology has come so far. Well, I mean,
Speaker 1: hooray for medical science. That's great. No, I don't take
Speaker 1: anything out of my body, all right, okay, So if
Speaker 1: this is about the money, don't worry. Okay, you'll be compensated.
Speaker 1: This is not about the money. Is because I'm looking
Speaker 1: at the price list right here, and we could probably
Speaker 1: give you thirty seven hundred for a spleen. I don't care.
Speaker 1: You don't what It was a really hot right now,
Speaker 1: everybody's buying spleens up. I like my sleen where it is.
Speaker 1: Stop trying to harvest me. Oh okay, now I think
Speaker 1: I see what it is in your head, your thing thinking,
Speaker 1: Oh like, I'm going to be in a New Orleans
Speaker 1: bathtub unconscious than some weirdo's going to come and take
Speaker 1: out my kidneys. Yeah, that's not how we do it.
Speaker 1: We're very professional about it. Don't you know? Our bathtubs
Speaker 1: are bigger? Are you kidding me? You don't you know
Speaker 1: what I'm I'm very uncomfortable with this. You're basically trying
Speaker 1: to get me to donate an organ to you. And
Speaker 1: you're not taking no for an answer. No, I'm asking
Speaker 1: a registered organ donor to do what he promised and
Speaker 1: donate one of his organs. I thought it was being
Speaker 1: nice and trying to help society, but now you're just
Speaker 1: being like, no, I have to do this right now.
Speaker 1: I don't even mention the six year old girl that
Speaker 1: could really use an appendix right now to save her life.
Speaker 1: That would be guilt tripping. You actually don't have one,
Speaker 1: and I'm not doing it. Actually don't have an appendix.
Speaker 1: Mine was taking out when I was a kid, so hahuh,
Speaker 1: too bad. See, and if you were a registered organ donor,
Speaker 1: you would have been paid for that. Whatever. You know what,
Speaker 1: none of this is making any sense, but I'd like
Speaker 1: to cancel my appointment please. I'm just saying, maybe we
Speaker 1: take a small piece of your kidney and then we
Speaker 1: can donate it to a local university. They could do
Speaker 1: some research. You won't even notice, at least to your
Speaker 1: fifty sixty years old. See, you're saying it would affect
Speaker 1: you later on. I don't. I don't like dude. A
Speaker 1: lot of people don't even make it to sixty, so
Speaker 1: it might not even be an issue. I plan on
Speaker 1: being a lot older than sixty. I don't like this.
Speaker 1: I am hanging up. Take my name off, I'm not
Speaker 1: coming in. Your wife Vanessa said there's one organ in
Speaker 1: particular that you never use, so can we at least
Speaker 1: take that one? Wait? Wait, why don't you speak about wife?
Speaker 1: I spoke to her after she emailed me to do
Speaker 1: this prank call on you, because I see I'm not
Speaker 1: actually with the doctor's office. I actually work on a
Speaker 1: radio show called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Are
Speaker 1: you hitting me? You can relax. I talked to her
Speaker 1: and she said she convinced you to become an organ downer,
Speaker 1: and said you're feeling a little bit hesitant about it. Yes,
Speaker 1: that was my greatest fear. Dude, you seem pretty bent
Speaker 1: out of shape about the donating the organ stuff. You
Speaker 1: didn't really blink when I mentioned your wife, Vanessa in
Speaker 1: that particular organ. Wait what wait? What? Wait? What did
Speaker 1: she say? She said, there's one morgan in particular that
Speaker 1: you never use. Uh no comments, Okay, wake up every
Speaker 1: morning with funk tabs weekday mornings on the twenties Brooke
Speaker 1: and Jeffrey in the Morning