Speaker 1: Ridiculous History is a production of I Heart Radio A
Speaker 1: little Ridiculous Historians. This is your heads up that we
Speaker 1: are doing something a little bit different this week that
Speaker 1: might not be for everyone. It's a wild ride. We
Speaker 1: very much enjoyed it. We're hanging with our good good
Speaker 1: friends Eli and Diana Banks at Ridiculous Romance. But no,
Speaker 1: we're talking about something a little saucier than we would
Speaker 1: talk about on Ridiculous History, aren't we. That's right. Today's
Speaker 1: episode is about the history of sauce. No, a different
Speaker 1: kind of sauce. Um No, yeah, sauciness, that's right, Ben.
Speaker 1: Today's episode is part two of the History of Sex Toys,
Speaker 1: about implements throughout history that have been designed to stimulate
Speaker 1: and to arouse. So understandably, this is one that's maybe
Speaker 1: not for the kiddos, you know, unless they're I mean,
Speaker 1: they've sort of stripped sex said from the schools these days,
Speaker 1: so maybe that's exactly what the kiddos need. Who are
Speaker 1: we to say, we just wanted to give fair warning
Speaker 1: as all. There's gonna be some uh, some raunchy talk, yes,
Speaker 1: frank and candid talk, uh, enlightening, illuminating, and it's an
Speaker 1: It's an interesting way to explore history. It's an interesting
Speaker 1: way to explore society as well. I do want to
Speaker 1: see our bodies and our bodies which are wonderlands. As
Speaker 1: you mentioned earlier. If you, uh, if you enjoy family
Speaker 1: experience where you're listening with more sensitive loved ones or
Speaker 1: with kids, uh, we draw your attention to some earlier
Speaker 1: episodes we did. I just want to take a second
Speaker 1: knowl and brag. Can we brag? Can we brag on?
Speaker 1: Max Williams? Super producer Max Williams surprised the heck out
Speaker 1: of us just recently, right before we hit the road
Speaker 1: when I once again through Max under the Lionel train
Speaker 1: and acted like we had a big sounds cue on
Speaker 1: the way. But hot gosh, man, he did it. Also,
Speaker 1: I'm saying, hot gosh, No, yeah, that that's not There's
Speaker 1: not gonna be any of that hedging uh in the
Speaker 1: actual episode, No, hot gosh, we go we go full
Speaker 1: bore Ethan and Jeff m but no man. I UM,
Speaker 1: I was in a bit of a slump that day.
Speaker 1: I was having some family issues that I was dealing with.
Speaker 1: And um our buddy uh and compatriot Matt Frederick Mr.
Speaker 1: Matt Frederick. Mr. Matt Frederick texted me repeatedly asking me
Speaker 1: to check out the QA for that day's episode or
Speaker 1: there the episode that went live, and finally got around
Speaker 1: to it and realized that Max had in fact recruited Matt, Matt,
Speaker 1: Max and Matt to do a guest vocal on the
Speaker 1: Max with the Facts sound cue, which is now forever
Speaker 1: emblazoned uh in the cannon of ridiculous history. So thank
Speaker 1: you both for that because it certainly cheered me right up.
Speaker 1: That's wonderful, that's wonderful, and this is this is one
Speaker 1: of the parts of this world right now. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: we said that sneaking in phone back and he's fallen
Speaker 1: thellege just for you right now here we fact God,
Speaker 1: so good, so good, And should we hear the other one? Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's hear the ultra one. Why not phone back and
Speaker 1: he drop in the hollege just for you. So good.
Speaker 1: There we go, oh, oh, so good. It's a Mommy
Speaker 1: for the ears. You can check that out in the
Speaker 1: wild on a previous episode. Again, if you're listening with
Speaker 1: kiddo's or maybe the Sex Toys episode is not for
Speaker 1: everyone in your family, but we do urge you to
Speaker 1: check out this episode and part one of the history
Speaker 1: of Sex Toys. This is a ridiculous romance production. More importantly,
Speaker 1: subscribe to their show because, uh, they've really got it together. Actually,
Speaker 1: Nolan Nolan, I talked about that off air. They are
Speaker 1: legit and we cannot wait for you to hear them,
Speaker 1: not to mention the whole ridiculous universe that's coming together.
Speaker 1: We've now got ridiculous crime which is now out there
Speaker 1: on the scene, and I believe by the time this
Speaker 1: episode comes out, we will have heard the announcement of
Speaker 1: Ridiculous News with our buddies Bill and Mark at the
Speaker 1: Helm of Ridiculous News, which will be a UM weekly
Speaker 1: or twice a week UM topical and Evergreen simultaneously somehow,
Speaker 1: because these guys are weird wizards show that tackles everything
Speaker 1: ridiculous in the news, which we know there's plenty of yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: and we are going to have them on an episode
Speaker 1: very very soon. So in the meantime, if you've ever
Speaker 1: asked yourself, let's see where chastity belts come from? This
Speaker 1: this part two is especially for you, hey, accidental rhyme
Speaker 1: or on purpose who knows here we go. Hey the French,
Speaker 1: come listen. Well, Elia and Diana got some stories to tell.
Speaker 1: There's no match making, all romantic tips. It's just about
Speaker 1: pridiculous relationships. A love it might be any type of
Speaker 1: person at all, and abstract cons that are a concrete wall.
Speaker 1: But if there's a story where the second glance ridiculous
Speaker 1: role that a production of I Heart Radio. Hey, everybody,
Speaker 1: welcome back to the show. IM so glad to have
Speaker 1: you as always. Yes, very exciting for part two today
Speaker 1: of our crossover with Ridiculous History hosts Ben Bowling and
Speaker 1: Noel Brown. Guys, welcome back, Thank you for being here.
Speaker 1: It is we remain. We went through a lot. In
Speaker 1: that lot, we learned a lot. I think. No, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: there was a lot of school girlish tittering going on.
Speaker 1: I was stimulated in both body and mind, and I
Speaker 1: was horrified. So all the ridiculous romance boxes are checked.
Speaker 1: Three tiers of any successful relationship, right, stimulating mind and uh,
Speaker 1: you knows horrified, Yes, so we Um, thank you guys
Speaker 1: so much for having us back on for our second date. Um,
Speaker 1: this was a wild ride. I'm not going to look
Speaker 1: at goats the same way for a while. Never Never,
Speaker 1: you really hung up on that goat island with the
Speaker 1: organic French tickler. Huh yeah, God yeah, it's painful. Um,
Speaker 1: but we're going to move past all that today. Uh,
Speaker 1: We're gonna leave the goats behind. We're talking about sex dolls.
Speaker 1: We're talking about chastity belts and all the mysteries surrounding
Speaker 1: them and beneath them. So to start us off, let's
Speaker 1: let's talk about sex dolls. Where where do they come from?
Speaker 1: What's it all about? I guess making a little avatar
Speaker 1: of your desires is probably pretty old school as long
Speaker 1: as we've had imaginations, right, people are like, I'll just
Speaker 1: pile some clothes together and see if I can making it.
Speaker 1: But according to black Book mag dot com, they have
Speaker 1: an article called sex Dolls a timeline which is very useful. Um,
Speaker 1: there were sailors in the fifteenth century who would take
Speaker 1: dolls that were, um, they were clothes stuffed with straw
Speaker 1: or with rags basically, and they were very not that
Speaker 1: humanoid looking. They're just kind of a vaguely human shape.
Speaker 1: It's hard to stuff clothes into a realistic dummy. Asked
Speaker 1: me how I know. Oh, I don't think we're going
Speaker 1: to but this, well, so is it like those creepy
Speaker 1: body pillows especially? Yeah? Sure, well, and then imagine some
Speaker 1: of them are straw, which is like so itchy, and
Speaker 1: I don't know, it doesn't seems as comfortable as rags.
Speaker 1: But they called them dom de voyage of the voyage, Yes,
Speaker 1: and they were just to occupy them while they were,
Speaker 1: you know, in their long journeys at sea. They would
Speaker 1: have and we did actually a whole episode about gay
Speaker 1: pirates um and they often would would would sometimes use
Speaker 1: each other, but I guess they would also sometimes take
Speaker 1: on these these stuffed rag dolls. Do you think kind
Speaker 1: of prison rules apply it? See, like what happens at
Speaker 1: It's like, I'm not actually gay, I'm just marooned. So
Speaker 1: what I think is interesting isn't. In the last episode,
Speaker 1: we talked about how people said women couldn't survive without
Speaker 1: an injection of seamen at some point or they would
Speaker 1: go insane. And yet here are these men going on
Speaker 1: a voyage who can't be gone for three months without
Speaker 1: putting their dick in something. S Yeah exactly. Are you
Speaker 1: guys familiar with the concept of a FIEFI I don't
Speaker 1: know if this is just something that like my friend
Speaker 1: made up or if this is like it definitely represents
Speaker 1: an actual thing that you guys will be familiar with.
Speaker 1: But this is a term that my friend Frank, friend
Speaker 1: of the show, friend of the universe uses for an
Speaker 1: improvised sexual device us Like, let's say a toilet paper
Speaker 1: roll stuffed with tissue filled with petroleum jelly. You know,
Speaker 1: it could be uh wintermel specific. I'm just just as
Speaker 1: as an example as another another confirmed or deny this.
Speaker 1: They could just be you know, two couch cushions. Um
Speaker 1: there you know, there any anything that you can use
Speaker 1: as a stand in for um, you know, the genuine article.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I don't know. I didn't know if anyone
Speaker 1: else has heard that term before. Yeah, if you go
Speaker 1: to uh, I guess we have. This is the website.
Speaker 1: If you go to all one word make pockets pussy
Speaker 1: dot com, you'll see how to make a FIEFI f
Speaker 1: I f I for everybody who also wants to ruin
Speaker 1: their search history. UNA make a FEEFI that's sailed for us,
Speaker 1: that sailed that is, it's probably got its own dom
Speaker 1: the voyage now. But but so like this has to
Speaker 1: have come a long way right at this point, I
Speaker 1: know that now is surely now. It's like if somebody
Speaker 1: is making a a scarecrow uh thing to have sex with,
Speaker 1: it's because that's what they want, right, aren't there better
Speaker 1: to be? There's so many options now, like all those
Speaker 1: real dolls and stuff that people. Oh, you can't tell
Speaker 1: the difference between these and real humans anymore. It's straight
Speaker 1: up Jude Law Ai. It's I can get a Jude
Speaker 1: law real doll. Let me look at you. Yourself might
Speaker 1: be a sex dollar not know it. This is the
Speaker 1: future we're moving towards. How have we not seen a
Speaker 1: movie about a sentient sex doll? They gets broad, they
Speaker 1: gets turned into because it comes from being a real
Speaker 1: doll to being a real woman, like in Pinocchio situation.
Speaker 1: You know, questions see that sort of like there's that
Speaker 1: movie Mannequin from the eighties, sort of that thing a
Speaker 1: little bit, But I don't know. I want to see
Speaker 1: that story updated. Yeah, A two four will probably get
Speaker 1: on it at some point. They make all those ai
Speaker 1: true true. I love that stuff and all the modern
Speaker 1: horror the right exactly. Um, but if you loved the
Speaker 1: modern sex doll, like real dolls and other versions of that.
Speaker 1: Unfortunately you have the Nazis to think for those man
Speaker 1: um But in one the s S leader Heinrich Himler,
Speaker 1: actually was very of the show. Enemy of the show. Apparently,
Speaker 1: was very concerned with the Nazi soldiers in like the
Speaker 1: front lines in Paris and stuff, going to visit too
Speaker 1: many prostitutes and getting STDs. And he was basically like,
Speaker 1: STDs are killing more of our soldiers than bullets are.
Speaker 1: So he's like, we need to give them something instead
Speaker 1: of going to visit these real women. We need to
Speaker 1: give him something else. So he got a sculptor named
Speaker 1: Arthur Rink involved in a project called the borg Killed
Speaker 1: Field Hygiene Project, and it was considered more secret than
Speaker 1: top secret, which considering their top secret things, pretty is
Speaker 1: funny to me. There's the Holy Grail and then a
Speaker 1: few not just below that, sex dolls. Sex. But that's
Speaker 1: his contribution to history. Like Arthur Rink made the sex
Speaker 1: doll his death bed. He's like, let my legacy live on,
Speaker 1: stab my name on the foot of every sex doll.
Speaker 1: So Black Book mag writes that quote. The sculptor on
Speaker 1: the project, Arthur Rink created three types of dolls. He
Speaker 1: had three different types. According to Rink, the s s
Speaker 1: wanted the breasts round and full, of course, and ss
Speaker 1: dr Olan Hennison insisted on a rose hip form that
Speaker 1: would grip well. Okay, so he's like a consultant on this.
Speaker 1: He like walked in, so he was like, listen, here's
Speaker 1: all my wish list. You know, do what you do best, Arthur,
Speaker 1: You're the sculptor, but I have some notes. Let's talk ergonomics.
Speaker 1: I want a good gripping surface. Nothing's worse than losing
Speaker 1: your grip. Right, these guys are already a war. Let's
Speaker 1: make it simple. Um. And then for the face, they
Speaker 1: were going back and forth on a face for this doll,
Speaker 1: and they agreed that, you know, this is a sex doll,
Speaker 1: so she needs to look a little naughty and like
Speaker 1: sort of slutty. They wanted a slutty face whatever that means,
Speaker 1: and the more of a come hither look let's call it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was like a you know, not a not a
Speaker 1: not ah an innocent looking gal. I guess. But they
Speaker 1: actually asked an actress at the time, whose name was
Speaker 1: kath von Nag to be the face of this doll,
Speaker 1: and obviously she said no, thank too. I was like,
Speaker 1: I would hate to be like, yes, put my face
Speaker 1: on all these sex dolls to be unbelievable. So they said, okay, well,
Speaker 1: we need to create an artificial face of lust that
Speaker 1: would be more appealing. Technician Franz Schockert a greed, saying, quote,
Speaker 1: the doll has only one purpose, and she should never
Speaker 1: become a substitute for the honorable mother at home. When
Speaker 1: the soldier makes love to board kills, she has anything
Speaker 1: to do with love. Yeah, board killed, I'm sorry, makes
Speaker 1: love makes love, sir, Look board kill deserves some respect.
Speaker 1: He says, this has nothing to do with love. Therefore,
Speaker 1: the face of our anthropomorphic sex machine should be exactly
Speaker 1: how Wigner described the common wanton's face. Also starting an
Speaker 1: industrial band called Anthropomorphic sex Machine, and you would do well,
Speaker 1: I think, and I would like to see the cover
Speaker 1: art most as possible, be one of those steam powered dildos.
Speaker 1: I think they open right, you can do like a
Speaker 1: variety pack of you. It was steam Powered Dildo is one,
Speaker 1: and then the shi sex Machine. Maybe that's the name
Speaker 1: of the album. The band is steam Power Dildo, the
Speaker 1: album sex Machine. I think we can discover some stuff here, right,
Speaker 1: I think I'm, you know, obviously astounded by episode one,
Speaker 1: and now we're diving right into Nazi real dolls, which
Speaker 1: is then they have names. Bordld that's a very sexy
Speaker 1: name I might have, but I mean, you know, maybe
Speaker 1: he's let me lost. So you don't like Frauleine BORKI
Speaker 1: make you think of the borg. I don't know, you know,
Speaker 1: like I want to be. I want to be assimilated
Speaker 1: when I lay with this, when you make love now
Speaker 1: you're speaking my language, assimilate me. One does not make
Speaker 1: love to a sex machine. So there, it's weird because
Speaker 1: I would imagine that the face, whatever the face ends
Speaker 1: up being, it's going to be frozen and whatever static
Speaker 1: expression they give it right, so it's like surprised or
Speaker 1: it's like whole saucy I'm into this, I guess, abject horror. Yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe that's the problem is that some people that's what
Speaker 1: the face they would like to see the most, I suppose,
Speaker 1: But yeah, they actually Time Magazine said that because they
Speaker 1: couldn't decide, you know, they didn't want it to look
Speaker 1: like someone's wife or mother. I guess they couldn't really
Speaker 1: nail down a slutty face for this doll. So and
Speaker 1: they tried, Okay, they took surveys, um so they kind
Speaker 1: of left the dolls face pretty blank, and they thought
Speaker 1: that the soldiers would more were more likely to use
Speaker 1: them if they could sort of impart their own fantasy
Speaker 1: onto the doll. And it didn't look like anything too specific.
Speaker 1: But of course they're Aryan. They're very much about Aaryan value,
Speaker 1: you know, uh, aesthetics or whatever. So of course they
Speaker 1: gave the creation still had blue eyes and blonde hair.
Speaker 1: So other than that, I guess you could give her
Speaker 1: full lips or thin lips, or a big nose or
Speaker 1: a small nose. However your imagination runs wild. You can
Speaker 1: customize these um just in your head, testing you in
Speaker 1: your mind. And so it says after extensive testing, which
Speaker 1: I have to ask, I would love to pull into
Speaker 1: speculation station and find out what the testing entailed. Sensual
Speaker 1: works both in the dark and in the light. Well,
Speaker 1: let's let's let's double check that that's science. I mean, like,
Speaker 1: you know, there's well, there's obviously to be the boring answers.
Speaker 1: They probably have to look at material science and stress
Speaker 1: on these so called comfort that checks out his science,
Speaker 1: but also also the thing that gets me, and this
Speaker 1: is just a hygiene thing. Um, are they one per soldiers?
Speaker 1: The distribution a single use thing or is it washable?
Speaker 1: If I was, if I was designing it, I would
Speaker 1: make an ejectable cartridge. You could take it out and
Speaker 1: put a new one in dishwasher safe. Where were you
Speaker 1: when the Nazis were trying to put together these threal dolls.
Speaker 1: I've been asked that question many times. Yah, think Nolan
Speaker 1: and I we're gonna ask that earlier. But yeah, so, yeah,
Speaker 1: So they did a bunch of testing on I'm surely
Speaker 1: material stresses. And also I guess how effective they were
Speaker 1: arousing you maybe that's my guess, my gross guests. And
Speaker 1: so they are like, these are ready to go, And
Speaker 1: Himmler ordered fifty dolls for his own troops, but by
Speaker 1: two they pulled the plug on this project because the
Speaker 1: soldiers were way too embarrassed to carry these dolls around
Speaker 1: and they were really worried that if they got captured
Speaker 1: by the enemy that like American in British and French
Speaker 1: soldiers will make fun of them, which is so funny
Speaker 1: that you're like, I'm a pow and my number one
Speaker 1: concern is they're going to make fun of me. I'm
Speaker 1: a proud Nazi soldier. I don't want to be teased. Wow,
Speaker 1: I mean I get it though, right, Like also especially
Speaker 1: get that given the propaganda war going on at that time,
Speaker 1: it would be a real gift to the Allies to
Speaker 1: be able to say, these guys are running into battle
Speaker 1: on the fighting for the forces of evil with Also,
Speaker 1: by the way, they're sex dolls right right by the way,
Speaker 1: these depraved tons are fucking these random sex dolls. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's probably true too. They were like, it'll make us
Speaker 1: look really weird and weak and bad. Um, we don't
Speaker 1: want we don't want to look bad. Letter by furiously,
Speaker 1: we'll make it work, I promised soldiers. Way. Yeah, I've
Speaker 1: always kind of been a little perplexed that like the
Speaker 1: need for us sex doll like kind of to teach
Speaker 1: their own But it's just so specific. It's like we've
Speaker 1: figured out, you know, analogs without having to you know,
Speaker 1: go all out and get this weird, uncanny valley. I
Speaker 1: just don't quite understand the appeal, especially nowadays, when they're like,
Speaker 1: you know, thousands and thousands of dollars. There's that movie
Speaker 1: large in the real Girl. Have you guys seen that with?
Speaker 1: But yeah, sex sexy, mean boy. What's his name, Ryan Goslip? Yea, yeah,
Speaker 1: he genuinely, you know, forms an attachment like an effect
Speaker 1: to this, uh, this thing and that because it's it's
Speaker 1: it's a very sweet film actually, but I think it
Speaker 1: probably for some people there is a lack of touch,
Speaker 1: lack of one on one, you know, skin on skin contact,
Speaker 1: and maybe these things fill a role for which I
Speaker 1: can totally understand. But in general, you know, for like
Speaker 1: the Army, it seems like they're easier, you know, ways
Speaker 1: to get this done and having to puzzle over what
Speaker 1: the face is going to look like and all that stuff.
Speaker 1: For the record, it's all about it if it's preventing
Speaker 1: sexual violence. But do you guys, do you guys remember
Speaker 1: the awesome show thirty Rock where James Crago appears as
Speaker 1: spoiler alert, a guy who is pretending to have as
Speaker 1: celebrity relationship because he's secretly in love with a body pillow.
Speaker 1: It's like some of the best dialogue they have. But
Speaker 1: while it seems like on balance it could be a
Speaker 1: it's it's not for me idea, but it could be
Speaker 1: a good idea. Um, if it's preventing violence, the thing
Speaker 1: that gets me is just a really cheap point. Like
Speaker 1: I live in a in a smaller, smaller abode. I
Speaker 1: like multifunctional appliances, you know what I mean. I don't
Speaker 1: like to get one thing that does one thing. So like, yeah,
Speaker 1: sure you could do stuff that do brush not sex it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I'm thinking like if it made coffee, or if
Speaker 1: it had like storage or something, that would be a
Speaker 1: different conversation. But I guess they didn't get to that
Speaker 1: point in testing, did they. I guess not. I would
Speaker 1: like mine to not. You know, I don't want to
Speaker 1: sex doll that's also like makes dinner and think you
Speaker 1: know all these traditional things. I want a sex doll
Speaker 1: that has a six figure income. Um, you know, it
Speaker 1: goes off to work every day. I clean up around
Speaker 1: the house, good credit, a nice car, a few credit cards.
Speaker 1: I'll stay home, I'll clean, I'll cook time stories like
Speaker 1: or something randomly. You know, now we're talking NOL. What
Speaker 1: did you do with your Teddy ruxpan doll? That's my question. Leave,
Speaker 1: that's the imagination listening public. No, I never actually had
Speaker 1: a Teddy expenda. It's probably why I am the way
Speaker 1: I am. Um, I was deprived. I was I believe
Speaker 1: we had a thrift store one that didn't the cassette
Speaker 1: didn't work. Oh yeah, I was all imagination. I believe
Speaker 1: it was my dad years back, uh, under cover of night,
Speaker 1: stuck in like a very very funked up cassette tape
Speaker 1: that was like some sort of heavy metal and didn't
Speaker 1: tell or my mom until she like set it up
Speaker 1: and all of a sudden, you know, it wasn't this song,
Speaker 1: but it was like tosome home like it with those
Speaker 1: empty eyes and just sort of man, no, I think
Speaker 1: it is what I'm saying. Yeah, well, we're in confession corner?
Speaker 1: Is that a? Is that a corner you guys have?
Speaker 1: Is there? We don't have confession corn yet, but maybe
Speaker 1: we should. I didn't lose my virginity for intensive purposes
Speaker 1: to one of those plush i Kea snakes, you know,
Speaker 1: um back in the in the in the these they
Speaker 1: were a lot more rudimentary and they were a little
Speaker 1: more like they weren't as quite as fluffy as they
Speaker 1: are now. But I had one on my Ikea bunk
Speaker 1: bed um and I just sort it was just there's something,
Speaker 1: you know, and there's all this what's happened? I'm so
Speaker 1: much about my body? Oh wow, I do not remember mine.
Speaker 1: M hmm, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, snake. It haunts
Speaker 1: my dreams, you know, I do remember those little um,
Speaker 1: those creepy little water snakes. You know, they were just
Speaker 1: like a rubbery sleeve with inside outside themselves. That would
Speaker 1: be a perfect fife. Yes, yeah, that may have been
Speaker 1: the original design. And they just thought, we have to
Speaker 1: we have to spin our marketing because we're creeping people out,
Speaker 1: you know, like the way that people sell massage tools. Uh. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they made little water snakes and said, you know what,
Speaker 1: sell this to kids. Put in the Discovery Channel store. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we need the children, so uh se dolls. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: we can thank the Nazis, and I guess you can
Speaker 1: also thank you know, let's not thank them, we can
Speaker 1: also thank I guess the American and British forces who
Speaker 1: destroyed the factories where they made these dolls during their
Speaker 1: bomb raids of Dresden. So we don't have any I
Speaker 1: guess we don't have an existing like legitt to the
Speaker 1: front Line doll, but there was a similar I don't
Speaker 1: think it was an actual sex doll, but it was
Speaker 1: based on the design uh doll that was sold in
Speaker 1: toy stores, and this woman, Ruth Handler, saw one and
Speaker 1: thought it was a beautiful, like blonde, lovely woman and
Speaker 1: decided to make a doll out of it in America.
Speaker 1: And so that is the inspiration for the very first
Speaker 1: Barbie doll. So actually Barbie doll. Barbie dolls were inspired
Speaker 1: by Nazi sex dolls. Wow at all speaking of things
Speaker 1: that were for adults, but then we're then marketed to
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, okay, so yeah, that's why Barbie is
Speaker 1: blonde with big boobs. She was originally meant to comfort
Speaker 1: comfort soldiers fighting for Aryan values. God's sort of a
Speaker 1: euphemism or like a kind of polite euphemism for a
Speaker 1: a sex worker was a comfort woman? Yeah yeah in
Speaker 1: the Pacific theater, Yeah, I guess they were comforted. I
Speaker 1: don't know if the women were very kind would think
Speaker 1: were comforted by it, But I guess they provided. So
Speaker 1: I'm comfort Wow, I can. I'm hung up on Fifi
Speaker 1: only because to me, Fifi a just from a childhood
Speaker 1: of cartoons. Fifi is like a blue pool poodle. Yeah right, Well,
Speaker 1: now you know guys, not anymore. Never got poodles the
Speaker 1: same way again, you're in that and that fifi would
Speaker 1: be kind of that French spelling the f I f
Speaker 1: I would be right, do you know it just spefi
Speaker 1: stand like, is it the first part of something that
Speaker 1: it is fully immersive flagrant? Fully immersive flagrant? No way,
Speaker 1: it's fully improvised. Yeah, somebody helped me out with an eye.
Speaker 1: Would I would make that second half a different f
Speaker 1: word improvised? You got to text their friend Frank after this. Yes,
Speaker 1: I'm so glad we clear that up. Thank you so much. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm just glad to know that it's not just a
Speaker 1: made up thing. I mean, it is all over the internet.
Speaker 1: It clearly as kind of a term. It would be
Speaker 1: weird if it would be weird if it was something
Speaker 1: or pal frank just made up and tried to like
Speaker 1: normalize us and slipped in the conversation. You know that
Speaker 1: sometimes he does it with such authority that I believe
Speaker 1: I believe Frankie's like this is like a big word
Speaker 1: that people say. I'd be like, oh, okay, I guess
Speaker 1: I better learn it real quickly to that shock. This
Speaker 1: is a great spot for a break, we will be
Speaker 1: right back, and we're back. But so, okay, I I
Speaker 1: didn't know that, But I also didn't know a really
Speaker 1: weird thing that you guys found about ancient Rome, like
Speaker 1: the story of love never did run easy or true
Speaker 1: for a lot of people. And you know, this is
Speaker 1: a situation that happens in ancient relationships as well as
Speaker 1: current ones. Sometimes people straight, sometimes they go go off
Speaker 1: the rails, and for one, you're another find a different
Speaker 1: lover outside of a committed relationship. Tail as old as time,
Speaker 1: as old as time, and yeah, apparently in ancient Athens
Speaker 1: and ancient Rome, both men and women who cheated on
Speaker 1: their spouses could legally be killed if they were caught
Speaker 1: like doing it, caught red handed or whatever hand, wherever
Speaker 1: your hand is. But there was also another quote non
Speaker 1: lethal humiliating punishment reserved for male cheaters, where the husband
Speaker 1: who had been cuckolded could legally sodomize the adulterer with
Speaker 1: an audience if they want so. Sometimes that meant that
Speaker 1: they would be he would himself penetrate the other gentleman um.
Speaker 1: But this ancient Rome and ancient Greece, I think that's
Speaker 1: what happened. Remember in the last episode, I talked about
Speaker 1: the scene in Caligula where he does that to another man.
Speaker 1: I believe it's that out of punishment for him having
Speaker 1: done something along these lines, because it's very public and
Speaker 1: like shaming. Kind of an eye for an eye, blink
Speaker 1: for a blink, right. Well, And we did talk a
Speaker 1: little bit point for a point. We did talk a
Speaker 1: little bit in the first one about how it was
Speaker 1: okay to have sex with men in ancient room, but
Speaker 1: only if you're the top. So it was very humiliated
Speaker 1: have anything put into your butt I guess, although you
Speaker 1: could put whatever you wanted into a but no problem um.
Speaker 1: And apparently, yeah, sometimes they would do it themselves, I guess,
Speaker 1: but more often than not, the punishment took a symbolic
Speaker 1: form where they would insert a radish into your butt hole.
Speaker 1: Spy and the historian Vicky Leon says, quote, I call
Speaker 1: it an ancient sting operation, since Greek radishes grew to
Speaker 1: a healthy size and had a good bite to them,
Speaker 1: So I guess it really stung in more ways than one. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I gotta wonder if someone ever ever knew the risk
Speaker 1: and said, like, I'll take the radish for it, you
Speaker 1: know what. I mean like, yeah, this is worth it,
Speaker 1: quick question. So if it was so, um, I guess
Speaker 1: shaming or just like taboo to be on the receiving
Speaker 1: end of this thing, does that mean that there were
Speaker 1: like special boys that were designed for this purpose or
Speaker 1: bread for this purpose. Essentially, you're gonna be my new
Speaker 1: Radish boy. Get over here. Um. But Vicky Leon also
Speaker 1: said that they, I guess probably to avoid this punishment.
Speaker 1: There were some men who, you know, they were like,
Speaker 1: I'm so randy, I just always ready to go. I
Speaker 1: need some anti afro das acts to sort of help me.
Speaker 1: I don't know herb my appetite, yeah, my enthusiasm. And
Speaker 1: so men would eat lettuce, which was a salad leaf
Speaker 1: thought to be a powerful antipotency drug at the time.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, let us always turns me off. Do you
Speaker 1: eat it and you're just like well, like in our
Speaker 1: our very first episode of this show, we talked about
Speaker 1: Celery and how sexy Celery was supposed to be as
Speaker 1: an aphrodisiac. Yeah. Back with them in France, Um, what's
Speaker 1: her name, Madame de pompadour, uh, and all them they
Speaker 1: thought Celary was was quite the aphrodisiac. Again, I don't
Speaker 1: know why, but whatever works for you. Let us as
Speaker 1: the inverse. I guess, yeah, when leafy one watery leafy
Speaker 1: green to another, I guess, doesn't celery Like doesn't it
Speaker 1: calorically expand more energety to eat than it provides? Anyway?
Speaker 1: You know, I have a theory about aphrodisiacs based on
Speaker 1: a asked conversation. I think it's all like independent marketing
Speaker 1: from people who are dealing with their own situations, you know,
Speaker 1: like it was was me, baby, it was the oysters,
Speaker 1: you know how I get, or or maybe someone's like,
Speaker 1: you know, I do think you're very attractive, very much
Speaker 1: in love with you, but I just had a salad.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe it's not you, it's not you. Is this
Speaker 1: where tossing the salad comes from? Do you think I
Speaker 1: always wondered about that? Yeah? I don't know what another day.
Speaker 1: Perhaps me and my silly etymology questions always thet They're
Speaker 1: always filthy, They're always filthy. Those are the fun etymologies
Speaker 1: to track down. To be fair, Speaking of filthy, another
Speaker 1: anti potency drug was cream made of mouse droppings. They
Speaker 1: would spread I guess onto their anatoles, which I'm like,
Speaker 1: just that never put ship on your dick. No, I
Speaker 1: just feel like that's always a bad idea. And also, honestly,
Speaker 1: all you have to say is cream made from mouse droppings,
Speaker 1: and I'm good. You don't need to rub it anywhere.
Speaker 1: You've said it. The images in my head, I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna have sex for a month, Well that's that's also
Speaker 1: like I think that's a hard anti aphrodisiac or that's
Speaker 1: a very um that's like a self fulfilling prophecy, right,
Speaker 1: because then it doesn't matter what kind of activity you
Speaker 1: want to get up to. Anybody who is like, what's
Speaker 1: a little mouse mouse poop between you know, between friends, Uh,
Speaker 1: they're not going to be the kind of person you
Speaker 1: want to sleep with. I'm just I hope that's not
Speaker 1: a blanket statement. I hope nobody feels judged. But if
Speaker 1: you're trying, if you're trying to like have a romantic
Speaker 1: partner and you keep striking out, it might be the
Speaker 1: mouse droppings. I'm just saying. Just yeah, Ben is trying
Speaker 1: to say, try something new and just it's the scientific method.
Speaker 1: See if you get the same results. Okay, so much
Speaker 1: like the bread sticks in the episode one, I'm wondering
Speaker 1: about the radishes. Speaking of salads, is you know, oh
Speaker 1: this salad is delicious. It's really turning me off. What's
Speaker 1: in there? Well, fresh radishes right from the garden, rushed
Speaker 1: out of some gardens, straight from the so not toss
Speaker 1: the salad radishes as a form of punishment, slash abuse
Speaker 1: anti afro das acts. I think that brings brings us
Speaker 1: to one of the one of the things that I
Speaker 1: was wondering about as well, which is chastity belts. Right.
Speaker 1: That's that's an anti afrods act for sure. Right, even
Speaker 1: if you want to, you can't do. Everybody loves chastity belts, right,
Speaker 1: I mean I always think of Robin hood men in
Speaker 1: tights of course any aspect and the ever last is hilarious. Um,
Speaker 1: big iron underwear with a padlock on it. Right, we
Speaker 1: all remember these, this impenetrable guard against scoundrels and ne'er
Speaker 1: do wells, uh, stopping sex in its tracks. The first
Speaker 1: evidence of chastity belts goes all the way back to
Speaker 1: the eleven hundreds. Um, now, Ben and all, we we
Speaker 1: do a segment on this show sometimes when we we
Speaker 1: have our main subject that we're talking about, but maybe
Speaker 1: we're gonna sneak off with something else for just a
Speaker 1: quick second. Uh, we're gonna take a little quick fling
Speaker 1: with history. Lock him up and throw away the key.
Speaker 1: So the Crusades, Uh, we've all heard of the Crusades, right,
Speaker 1: That's where we're going to with this one, about a
Speaker 1: three century period in Europe where Christians went out marching
Speaker 1: across the lands to bring the good word of peace
Speaker 1: and love about Christ. By um checking my notes here, Uh,
Speaker 1: lots of stabbing. Basically stars and spears. Crusades, very Jesus like, Yeah,
Speaker 1: obviously more complicated than that. We're not going to get
Speaker 1: the whole history the Crusades here. But the thing that
Speaker 1: step rid of the Crusades from other Christian religious wars
Speaker 1: was that the prize for participating in one was free absolution.
Speaker 1: Like you were absolved of your sins if you went
Speaker 1: and fought in the Crusades. So there's all these dudes like,
Speaker 1: what this is my chance I've been waiting around for
Speaker 1: to someone absolve me of all my sins. Some some guy,
Speaker 1: probably like Gregor the Smith, is like, I've got believe
Speaker 1: I have sinned these rules for getting into heaven, But
Speaker 1: dema broke every single one of them. And uh so
Speaker 1: somebody says to him, Hey, you know what, come on down, Gregor,
Speaker 1: sign up for the Crusades. You'll be free to go
Speaker 1: get into heaven. All you gotta do is kill a
Speaker 1: bunch of people for us. And everything's all set. But
Speaker 1: but this guy, Gregor the Smith, he's worried while my
Speaker 1: wife is back home. And of course, as we've all learned,
Speaker 1: wandering uterus women can't go but a few months without sex.
Speaker 1: So if he's off for years in the Crusades, how's
Speaker 1: he going to stop this from happening. So he goes
Speaker 1: off to the blacksmith and or maybe he's the blacksmith.
Speaker 1: I think we called him Gregor the Smith, all right,
Speaker 1: And he starts forging and he makes this metal underwear
Speaker 1: and he puts a big old padlock on it, straps
Speaker 1: it around his wife and says, good luck getting railed now.
Speaker 1: And he made a bunch of them passed him out
Speaker 1: to all the other villagers the key, and uh it
Speaker 1: was like the hottest item of the day. Everyone had one, right, Wow,
Speaker 1: So ladies walking around with iron underwear just all through
Speaker 1: all the Crusades, so that they wouldn't be cheating on
Speaker 1: their husbands. The thing is, none of that happened. This
Speaker 1: was all a story that was made up in the Renaissance.
Speaker 1: So there was a Rancor article by Genevieve Carlton where
Speaker 1: I got some info on this. She said quote one
Speaker 1: of the favorite pastimes of folks in the Renaissance was
Speaker 1: laughing about the ignorance of the medieval period, right. They
Speaker 1: wanted to feel superior. They're like, we're so educated, we
Speaker 1: have a art, but our ancestors, well, they were so
Speaker 1: dumb and mindless, and they came up with dumb stuff
Speaker 1: like this chastity belt, and they invented these stories to
Speaker 1: make their predecessors sound stupid basically, So it's just like
Speaker 1: this dick ish, belittling move through time because they wanted
Speaker 1: to say that these barbaric medieval people were, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: just insecure and incapable of pleasing their wives, and that
Speaker 1: their wives just constantly cheat on them. So they came
Speaker 1: up with this idea for the chastity belt. That's so funny.
Speaker 1: You think they'd be like, let's dunk on him by
Speaker 1: being like, hey, you killed a lot of people. I'll
Speaker 1: say the idea goes back earlier than that because in
Speaker 1: the Roman times, uh there's Roman women would wear a
Speaker 1: knotted belt that they would wear right up into their
Speaker 1: wedding day and then the husband would ceremoniously un not
Speaker 1: the belt. And so later on that belt kind of
Speaker 1: endured and they even started sort of gilding it in metal.
Speaker 1: So they think maybe they found these metal knotted belts
Speaker 1: that survived history and said that's sort of where they
Speaker 1: developed the concept for the chat that he built and
Speaker 1: the Renaissance. So that that checks out. That sounds like
Speaker 1: the historic game of telephone, you know, cover right with
Speaker 1: prejudice against the past and what have you. But also
Speaker 1: didn't this ultimately, I don't know how far ahead this is,
Speaker 1: but didn't this ultimately like become a thing that people
Speaker 1: wanted to do or some version of it, Like it's
Speaker 1: isn't it like a fetish? At some point? To some
Speaker 1: degree in the modern era, we've gotten more into that
Speaker 1: where this sort of like forced chastity, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: keeping someone under lock and key. From from my research,
Speaker 1: it's seemed that that's more skewed towards penis having individuals
Speaker 1: that there's a cage lock and for your lock up
Speaker 1: your dick. So I guess so that you can't get
Speaker 1: an erection or be stimulated at all, and your partner
Speaker 1: walks away with the key and says not until I
Speaker 1: say so. Um, well, kind of a power dynamic. Yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 1: when you like hurt yourself with natural uh cycles of
Speaker 1: two messence, you can break a dick. Absolutely. It has
Speaker 1: been one of my biggest questions about these, and I've
Speaker 1: certainly never tried one. I don't know if anybody in
Speaker 1: the list un of our listeners can right in and
Speaker 1: let us know what that's like. If we get an
Speaker 1: answering machine on that, I will be thrilled. Yes, what happens?
Speaker 1: Can you bust out of these cages? Can you hulk out?
Speaker 1: If they're not strong enough? It does look like they
Speaker 1: have a hole to piece for for function, And I'll
Speaker 1: say some of the old designs of chastis belts from
Speaker 1: the Renaissance. There's this guy, Conrad Kaiser who wrote a
Speaker 1: book in fourteen o five called The Bellafortis, which is
Speaker 1: this military technology illustrated classic. He just drew all these
Speaker 1: crazy industrial military machines and he said, any other country
Speaker 1: that sees this book is going to get scared and
Speaker 1: run away. But he also included the first known drawing
Speaker 1: of a chastity belt, and it's got some gaps in
Speaker 1: the front and back so that you know, I guess
Speaker 1: you can do your business still, um, but not enough
Speaker 1: to actually get penetrated. So the thing is his book
Speaker 1: was also full of jokes. They're pretty sure that he
Speaker 1: was making this as yet another joke in the Renaissance
Speaker 1: about what medieval people were doing. He's got fart jokes
Speaker 1: in there, like the Onion of its time. Yeah magazine
Speaker 1: or something, okay, magazine, Yeah, that's funny, Okay. And there's
Speaker 1: there's Renaissance artwork again, all featuring chastity belts. It's always
Speaker 1: the same thing. It's some man locking up his wife.
Speaker 1: She's always topless, she's always tits out, you know, because
Speaker 1: she's insatiable, Like, yeah, we lock up your vagina, but
Speaker 1: your tits are free to row. These paintings always have
Speaker 1: like a guy sneaking around in the background, because they're
Speaker 1: trying to show the futility of them. Usually the guy
Speaker 1: in the background has is sneakily holding a key up
Speaker 1: in the shadows like I've already get made a copy
Speaker 1: foolish husband he never knew and made just the key
Speaker 1: of So it's just, you know, just again, this is
Speaker 1: perpetual joke out of the Renaissance, and it it just
Speaker 1: endured through the years to the point where we believed
Speaker 1: it to be history for a long time. In fact,
Speaker 1: the British Museum in the in the nineteen nineties was
Speaker 1: taking down exhibits of chastity belt that they had just
Speaker 1: assumed to be historically accurate, and when they dated the metal,
Speaker 1: they discovered that these things were from like the late
Speaker 1: eighteen hundreds, but then they said had belonged to Catherine
Speaker 1: de Medici, the Queen of France of you know, back
Speaker 1: in the sixteenth century. They thought this was her chastity belt,
Speaker 1: and then they dated it. Oh, never mind, this is
Speaker 1: from the nineteenth century. It was probably just a joke.
Speaker 1: So it's like it's like the Iron Maiden, which the
Speaker 1: torture device that turns out to have been mostly fictitious
Speaker 1: or doesn't make exactly. There was tons of like uh,
Speaker 1: torture museums and exotic you know, uh oddities being sold
Speaker 1: back then, and people literally just bought up some metal
Speaker 1: built chastity belts and said come see this barbaric invention
Speaker 1: that our medieval people came up with, ye totally false.
Speaker 1: In fact, I will say that in the eighteenth century Mr.
Speaker 1: Voltaire wrote a poem kind of mocking the whole idea
Speaker 1: of chastity belts. We got another poem very excited. His
Speaker 1: whole point in this poem was that it was foolish
Speaker 1: to force fidelity by locking a woman up, and that
Speaker 1: the whole poem is pretty long. But what pulled out
Speaker 1: a couple of selections here and I say we go
Speaker 1: on down the poetry corner, and here a selection from
Speaker 1: Voltaire's poem The Padlock. Each cuckled soul who during life
Speaker 1: did all he could to plague his wife. Then thus
Speaker 1: declared a Florentine, most mighty monarch idopine for death. For
Speaker 1: once a wife is dead, she can't defile the marriage bed.
Speaker 1: But ast an immortal wife can never be deprived of
Speaker 1: life a padlock. Therefore, I'd invent which should such accidents prevent?
Speaker 1: She must be virtuous, of course, when under the restraint
Speaker 1: of force, not to be come at by her elf.
Speaker 1: You're sure to have her to yourself, which I had
Speaker 1: thought before I died. Such a convenience to provide this
Speaker 1: sage advice allowed applause from all the damned assembly draws
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do in my bain voice, and even Pluto's
Speaker 1: self some pity felt when spouses for you, he made
Speaker 1: fast and said you will now perforce to chaste this lock,
Speaker 1: which hell caught frame alone soon to The human race
Speaker 1: was known in Venice, Rome and all about it. No
Speaker 1: gentleman or sits without it. Tis always though a method.
Speaker 1: Sure all female honor too secure their husbands. Though some
Speaker 1: sneerers mack keep virtue safe and underlock, but all his
Speaker 1: jealous care is in vain. Love always knows his ends
Speaker 1: to gain that God will share a spouse or cause
Speaker 1: he still protects who keeps his laws. For you have
Speaker 1: given me your hearts and can't refuse me any parts.
Speaker 1: Soccer vibes, get out, get creepy inside the house bad
Speaker 1: times that He's like, it's clearly an accident. We want
Speaker 1: to prevent these accidents where you trip and your dick
Speaker 1: falls into my wife who left, who's cleaning around? But
Speaker 1: against satire, Yes, exactly, yes, Voltaire totally mocking the whole
Speaker 1: notion um has seemed to be all anyone was ever
Speaker 1: really doing was kind of teasing about it. I'm imagining
Speaker 1: like a thousand years from now, someone unearthing something from
Speaker 1: Spencer's gifts. I guess they really used this. So like,
Speaker 1: do you guys remember the pin thing? There was a
Speaker 1: big on your face, in your hands and a shape.
Speaker 1: Someone's going to find that and be like, you know
Speaker 1: what I think people were doing. I think they were
Speaker 1: banging this thing, just like, let's write a poem about it.
Speaker 1: I need to sell some books. Let's write a poem
Speaker 1: about it. Man in the first century loved to take
Speaker 1: a box of three thousand nails. Let his dick in.
Speaker 1: Just go to Jim Rose circus side show kind of ship.
Speaker 1: This is a great spot for a break. We'll be
Speaker 1: right back, all right, welcome back to the show. But okay,
Speaker 1: but Eli, we know that there are physical like artifacts
Speaker 1: like somewhere along the line. Despite the story being untrue,
Speaker 1: several people thought satire. No, they were like, I'm going
Speaker 1: to make one though, right yeah, And typically again these
Speaker 1: were made mostly four show um, whether it being sold
Speaker 1: off in a museum or send out one of these
Speaker 1: oddity tours. The idea was that they were always made
Speaker 1: as fakes from history. In fact, historian curator Leslie Smith
Speaker 1: said quote, I have traveled abroad and looked at art
Speaker 1: collect and as yet haven't seen a chastity belt that
Speaker 1: can be proved to be in medieval origin. So, as
Speaker 1: far as anyone can tell, all these manufactured chastity belts
Speaker 1: were made as basically a historical prank. Don't buy those
Speaker 1: vintage chastis belts on Amazon. They're not worth it. Uh Yeah.
Speaker 1: British Museum the Cleaning Museum in France both have had
Speaker 1: to take down exhibits of chastity belts that they had
Speaker 1: previously said were historical objects and then found out Nope,
Speaker 1: these were totally bogus. That's embarrassing and I love that that,
Speaker 1: Like you mentioned Ben that that that today we've turned
Speaker 1: it all around and we've made them for for pleasure devices,
Speaker 1: almost the opposite of their original supposed intention. That's true.
Speaker 1: That is funny. It was originally meant to keep you
Speaker 1: from having sex, and now it's like this is part
Speaker 1: of the sex and it's super hot, Tan trick. Now
Speaker 1: your sex is ten hours long. So I do wanna,
Speaker 1: I do want to give some shout outs to our
Speaker 1: our off fair friends who reacted a bit strangely when
Speaker 1: they heard and no, I don't know if you had
Speaker 1: this conversation too, but fact a bit strangely when uh,
Speaker 1: we were going to hang out and I said, oh, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I gotta we're doing a two part thing on sex toys,
Speaker 1: and and they this is multiple people. They were like,
Speaker 1: you mean like you and ol or getting together to
Speaker 1: talk about sex toys or it was like no, we're
Speaker 1: we're we're hanging out with some other people too. I
Speaker 1: just made it worse. But are married friends, are married
Speaker 1: friends were all going to do sex toys together us
Speaker 1: into their relationships. Very progressive. I love it. I did
Speaker 1: see someone on Twitter be like, I we said it
Speaker 1: some about a two parter, and they were like, isn't
Speaker 1: that called a double? A double? Fister? Shout out to fister.
Speaker 1: That's the thing. Um unrelated, totally related. I went in
Speaker 1: researching some of the stuff. I found a place that
Speaker 1: I think we should all figure out a way to
Speaker 1: take a field trip to. In San Francisco there is
Speaker 1: a museum, uh for sex toys, and it's called Good
Speaker 1: Vibrations Antique Vibrator Museum specifically. And then of course in
Speaker 1: in New York. The Museum of Sex is really cool.
Speaker 1: I've actually been there. Uh. And they have like all
Speaker 1: kinds of vintage porn and and sex toys and all
Speaker 1: these guys. I mean, it's really just fascinating and it's
Speaker 1: a very very naughty and body Uh. And they have
Speaker 1: a gift shop at the end where you know, if
Speaker 1: you can imagine what they say there. But yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't know if it was a permanent name, but it was.
Speaker 1: It was there when I was there. It was a
Speaker 1: bouncy house made of everybody said. There's also I think
Speaker 1: there's the Vagina Museum I believe is in England, probably
Speaker 1: in London, but I follow their Twitter account and it's
Speaker 1: really awesome, isn't it the Fannie Museum in London? There
Speaker 1: it is Fanny I thought was a but no, no,
Speaker 1: I didn't know that. That's why Fannie Pack is hilarious
Speaker 1: to all our British friends. Okay, that would be that
Speaker 1: the vagina is already its own fanny pack. Another like
Speaker 1: kind of naughty er. I think that fantasy This is
Speaker 1: this sort of slangy but the word minge oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just so visceral sounding. Yeah. While we're on tour.
Speaker 1: While you take the Ridiculous Universe on a museum tour,
Speaker 1: we should also stop by Iceland. Do you see the
Speaker 1: Penis Museum. Oh sure, yeah. I love how open we
Speaker 1: all are. Everybody's like, oh yeah, yeah, I don't listen down.
Speaker 1: I'm down for that. Hey, I'll see a museum of anything. Yea. Honestly,
Speaker 1: the weirder museums are really more fun. The more niche
Speaker 1: the better because it's took some real weirdos to curate
Speaker 1: that stuff. You know, like the Museum of Death. I
Speaker 1: think it's one of my favorites of all. There's one
Speaker 1: in Hollywood, and there's one in New Orleans, and there's
Speaker 1: the Museum. There's like the Museum of Murder. There's the
Speaker 1: Museum of Jurassic Technology, which is uh super cool. I
Speaker 1: think we can. I'll check out one in the world.
Speaker 1: We're on the West coast, but I feel you guys.
Speaker 1: I love like you were saying incredibly specific museums. It's
Speaker 1: why I'm slow on road trips because if I if
Speaker 1: I'm like passing, we did a show on this for
Speaker 1: stuff they want you to know. But if I'm like passing,
Speaker 1: just some beat up sign that is like the official
Speaker 1: uh the I'm thinking the most ridiculous thing, like the
Speaker 1: official Museum of left Shoes throughout history, guaranteed no writings.
Speaker 1: Then I'm like, there goes the afternoon. You know, I
Speaker 1: gotta go see. I love it. Have you seen the
Speaker 1: Bigfoot Museum in the Curious It's real cool. Niche The
Speaker 1: guy that runs it, David. What's the guy's name that
Speaker 1: runs up him? David? He is the quintessential niche interest focused,
Speaker 1: you know, museum curator. He does such a good job.
Speaker 1: Like the exhibits there are very much just inspired by
Speaker 1: I think, like you know, vintage Disney kind of Epcot
Speaker 1: type vibes, you know, like Hall of President type. I
Speaker 1: mean it's really really well done and uh, I highly
Speaker 1: recommend anybody passing through check out. I guess the museum.
Speaker 1: I guess. My question is where's the Bigfoot sex toy museum?
Speaker 1: That's that's the natural progression. This this could be our
Speaker 1: contribution to museum sciences. We could make the Bigfoot. Is
Speaker 1: there is there a Bigfoot chat that he built? We
Speaker 1: can make one can apparently just make him up, So
Speaker 1: just make one. Have anyone was gonna hulk their way
Speaker 1: out of with chastity about though it's gonna be a
Speaker 1: big foot, you can contain those fellas they are. It's
Speaker 1: not just you know, big big shoes. This has definitely
Speaker 1: altered I don't know about you know, but this is
Speaker 1: altered a lot of the conversations that I'm having in
Speaker 1: the future. I am. I've learned a lot. I don't
Speaker 1: know if I wanted to learn all of it, uh,
Speaker 1: but now I can't. It's our shows, sweet spots, stuff
Speaker 1: you made thought of, you wanted to know about, you didn't. Really,
Speaker 1: I'm starting a nonprofit for goats. This is not it's
Speaker 1: really the things that the stuff we've learned about goats
Speaker 1: on this show, it's unreasonable. Yeah, I think we did it.
Speaker 1: We've talked about every sex toy in history. No, that's
Speaker 1: not true. Now there's a whole other episode getting dedicated
Speaker 1: to vibrators. Yes, in pornography. Also, I liked all the
Speaker 1: porn and brothel stuff out. But it's also very fascinating.
Speaker 1: H Well, what a ride. I learned a lot about
Speaker 1: the mind, the body, society, and goats. Man. I'm still
Speaker 1: I'm still hung up on it. I'm I'm worried about him. Yeah,
Speaker 1: the goats definitely. You know, when elephants fight, the goats
Speaker 1: are the ones who suffer. Isn't that how the expression goes?
Speaker 1: You get there? Yeah? Plus yeah, yeah, it's weird like
Speaker 1: for some reason, I just can't sit straight either. I
Speaker 1: don't know what's going on. Oh buddy, oh man, I
Speaker 1: might have taken let's let's move along. Seriously. He was
Speaker 1: thanks to Diana and Eli for bringing us along on
Speaker 1: that raunchy and educational ride. Rawn vacational. It was a
Speaker 1: lot of fun. Yeah, Rawn vacational. But I mean that's
Speaker 1: the thing though, you know, history is is is it
Speaker 1: is just talk full of this stuff. I mean, ever
Speaker 1: since people have, you know, figured out that they had parts,
Speaker 1: they've been figuring out how to put stuff in them. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: well said. And also we wanna we wanted to say
Speaker 1: that Eli and Diana were so kind to have us on.
Speaker 1: We had such a fun time that we're gonna have
Speaker 1: them on in the future. Love their energy, love their chemistry,
Speaker 1: and actually also I gotta say I love the research
Speaker 1: they conduct. These are smart, witty people, and I feel
Speaker 1: like they would want they I feel like they want
Speaker 1: both of us to note that it's it's not always sex.
Speaker 1: There's more to romance than sex, so you are gonna
Speaker 1: find it's just a fascinating way to explore history. I
Speaker 1: think ridiculous Romance. So thanks to them. Do check it out.
Speaker 1: When do us a favorite, go subscribe to their show.
Speaker 1: Let us know what your favorite episodes of Ridiculous Romance are.
Speaker 1: You can let us know on our Facebook page Ridiculous Historians.
Speaker 1: One of the best places is on the internet. Uh,
Speaker 1: that's official as of two. We got the award in January.
Speaker 1: We also made the award uh and gave it to ourselves.
Speaker 1: Just to be clear, but we're also all over the
Speaker 1: internet if you want to find us, not just as
Speaker 1: a show, but as individuals. The rumors are true, Mr
Speaker 1: Noel Brown, I hear you're on Instagram. Who's spread and rumors?
Speaker 1: Who's saying all this stuff? It was track them down.
Speaker 1: It was a grackle in Austin. Oh my god, have
Speaker 1: you guys heard of? The grackle are everywhere. They're like,
Speaker 1: you know how I feel about birds. I mean, we
Speaker 1: were in tacos at torches tacos shout out really great tacos.
Speaker 1: But um, these guys they're beautiful. They have these iridescent
Speaker 1: feathers to the point where they like they turn a
Speaker 1: certain direction in the light. They almost change colors entirely.
Speaker 1: But they're really bold, much bolder than your average pigeon.
Speaker 1: And Um, this guy was just I and me amazing,
Speaker 1: literally like direct contact with UM for a taco at
Speaker 1: the Grackle. You're not gonna find any bird content on
Speaker 1: my page, but if you want to find some, you know, uh,
Speaker 1: thirteen year old goth kid content. I say this because
Speaker 1: I am the proud father of a thirteen year old.
Speaker 1: She said she would, she would, she would take issue
Speaker 1: with that. I don't know what she is. She doesn't
Speaker 1: listen to she doesn't actually to podcast. You can find
Speaker 1: me on Instagram exclusively where I am at. How now,
Speaker 1: Noel Brown, Ben Boland, Where can people find you? Well,
Speaker 1: if you want, this will be funny. I don't know
Speaker 1: if you guys saw this, but late last night I
Speaker 1: happened to cross a seller with the padlock undone. I'm
Speaker 1: not going to reveal the location in this place, but
Speaker 1: I went down into the depths and the seller was
Speaker 1: much larger than it appeared. I believe it actually goes
Speaker 1: under the street. I got to the point where I
Speaker 1: might actually need some rope to continue, like we might
Speaker 1: be in a splunking situation. You can check that out
Speaker 1: on just an HP Lovecraft story. You're describing that. No,
Speaker 1: this is like if you go to my story right now,
Speaker 1: you can see it. Uh, it's weird. You can see
Speaker 1: this in my more of my behind the scenes adventures
Speaker 1: and misadventures and occasionally brushes with authorities, as well as
Speaker 1: research I'm doing for upcoming episodes and secret projects. APT
Speaker 1: been bowling bow l I and on Instagram. You can
Speaker 1: also talk with me directly there, or you can find
Speaker 1: me on Twitter where I'm at ben Bowling h s W.
Speaker 1: And while you're on Twitter, why not check out that
Speaker 1: Mr Max Williams. Yes, I am on Twitter. I am
Speaker 1: at a t L underscore Max Williams. You can you
Speaker 1: know Seev trolling Bend or you know, retweeting and commenting
Speaker 1: on Eli and Diana, who are amazing and are both
Speaker 1: on Twitter as well. You can also see the formation
Speaker 1: of our um are burgeoning nemesis kind of relationship that
Speaker 1: we're both really trying to cultivate and tend to with care.
Speaker 1: Um I'm getting I'm out on Twitter. You won't find
Speaker 1: anything about that. You just maybe find Max tweeting into
Speaker 1: the void at me, but probably not. I couldn't say
Speaker 1: you can. You can also, of course, find our pals
Speaker 1: Ridiculous Crime, Zarin and Elizabeth on Twitter, so say hi
Speaker 1: to them. I feel like we're listening off a lot
Speaker 1: of Twitter people, uh, a lot of twitteration. But the
Speaker 1: point is you can find us. Love to talk to you,
Speaker 1: Ridiculous Universe, Ridiculous News, Ridiculous Crime, and of course, of
Speaker 1: course the lovely folks you just heard at Ridiculous Romance.
Speaker 1: We have come a long way, no, both as a
Speaker 1: show and as and in terms of our well, our knowledge,
Speaker 1: of our knowledge of sex toys, and we hope you
Speaker 1: have to We'll see you next time, folks. For more
Speaker 1: podcasts from my Heart Radio, visit the I Heart Radio app,
Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.