Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that just came up with an
Speaker 1: idea to revolutionize the fast food industry. Wow, tell me
Speaker 1: the picture it. Instead of a drive through lane going
Speaker 1: around the restaurant to get in your order, you drive
Speaker 1: right through the kitchen into the dining area to work
Speaker 1: out exhaust. It's always smelt like that, sweetie. Just bite in.
Speaker 1: It's Laser Stories, the segment where we read weird news
Speaker 1: stories around the glob just like everyone else does, except
Speaker 1: we have a laser. Those other pork forkers just don't.
Speaker 1: This first Laser Stories out of West Palm Beach, a
Speaker 1: single mother of two named Hayden was recently contacted on
Speaker 1: Instagram by a very attractive man. Oh okay you his
Speaker 1: name is Marcus, and he DMed her, but things started
Speaker 1: going way too fast when he got creepy and threatening.
Speaker 1: Why guys, why do you do this? She eventually blocked him.
Speaker 1: Yeah she should, threatened lady. But a couple weeks later,
Speaker 1: another account with an image of Marcus showed up as
Speaker 1: a suggested connection on Instagram. This time it had a
Speaker 1: different name, Alex the Officer. Oh you know what, I
Speaker 1: bet they're going to totally pull one over on her.
Speaker 1: So Hayden actually decided to reach out and they started
Speaker 1: exchanging messages and she wasn't She wasn't confronting him either.
Speaker 1: She was actually interested in him. But it's the same picture.
Speaker 1: So this time they video chatted to prove that they
Speaker 1: were who they claimed to be, and when she told
Speaker 1: him what happened, Alex says his image has been used
Speaker 1: many times to try to catfish hundreds of women from
Speaker 1: the US to Peru, using several different names, including Marcus.
Speaker 1: So that was a real one, Alex was a real
Speaker 1: one and Marcus was the catfish. Yep. The two bonded
Speaker 1: over the story about how Hayden almost got catfished using
Speaker 1: his picture. Wow, I still would believe I've still I
Speaker 1: mean even have they met in person now and now
Speaker 1: the couple has been officially dating for two months. Dude,
Speaker 1: Now you feel special Like I'm getting the celebrity catfish guy.
Speaker 1: He must be hot. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Hayden and Alex
Speaker 1: say they're telling their story to warn others of catfishing
Speaker 1: and to emphasize the importance of being skeptical of strangers online.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna speak for the whole group here. If
Speaker 1: you want to use any of our photos to try
Speaker 1: and catfish someone go for it. Somebody did use my
Speaker 1: photo and my same name, and people were like, nah,
Speaker 1: it didn't work because they weren't attractive. I'm sorry, Jo,
Speaker 1: it's okay. This next laser story is out of Brazil.
Speaker 1: There's a twenty seven year old Brazilian singer who goes
Speaker 1: by the name PoCA, short for her old stage name
Speaker 1: MC pocahonis. But she's she's in the news now for
Speaker 1: a completely different and hilarious reason. Recently, she posted a
Speaker 1: series of videos on social media after she woke up
Speaker 1: at five thirty am with severe stomach pains. Oh no,
Speaker 1: it was so bad that she went to the ears
Speaker 1: or something. Turns out she was only in pain because
Speaker 1: she refused to pass gas in front of her boyfriend.
Speaker 1: I thought guy did because he just held it in
Speaker 1: and that's why her tummy. She said. They haven't been
Speaker 1: dating long enough to be on open flatlence. Turns so
Speaker 1: she'd been holding them in and it caused a quote
Speaker 1: accumulation of trapped gas in her intestines. I will never
Speaker 1: forget the first time I ever farted in front of
Speaker 1: my husband. It was on accident and we were in
Speaker 1: a quiet area of this restaurant and I was standing
Speaker 1: next to it. But it just I am still mortified,
Speaker 1: and he laughed so hard. I love that stuff. She
Speaker 1: ended up deleting the videos after those went viral, maybe
Speaker 1: because her team decided that her biggest story to date
Speaker 1: was a celect being full of arts and that could
Speaker 1: probably damage her sex if here. I don't think so
Speaker 1: there's a market for that. Well, the good news is
Speaker 1: she's fine, and she now says she's letting him rip
Speaker 1: in front of the guy, and she encourages her sixteen
Speaker 1: million followers to do the same. In fact, I think
Speaker 1: we should all do it right now in solidarity. Yea,
Speaker 1: on account of three All right, your next laser story
Speaker 1: is out of nerd News. So this is a quick
Speaker 1: recap of cool science stuff you may have missed over
Speaker 1: the weekend. If you haven't heard, researchers in Italy figured
Speaker 1: out how to make pizza dough rise without using yeast.
Speaker 1: Who's amazing, I mean, is it helpful of the world
Speaker 1: to do that? It's good news for anybody who's allergic
Speaker 1: to it. Also, a new mailed contraceptive pill was found
Speaker 1: to be ninety nine percent effective in mice. Okay about
Speaker 1: human just one problem. No one in the science community
Speaker 1: trust men would actually remember to take it. No one
Speaker 1: in the women community trusted either, But we would still
Speaker 1: like it as an option. Yeah, even though it could
Speaker 1: enter human trials by the end of the year, there's
Speaker 1: serious doubts the product is going to sell. You're just
Speaker 1: spiking your husband or boyfriends. Meanwhile, in big fish news,
Speaker 1: a study found great white sharks form friendships. Are the
Speaker 1: great white friendships. They'll sometimes swim around together to make
Speaker 1: murdering other fish and humans easier. It's like book has
Speaker 1: her book club, the sharks have their murder club. They're like, hey, buddy,
Speaker 1: that was a good murder for some nights where I
Speaker 1: feel like it could turn into And finally, in space news,
Speaker 1: NASA says we've now found more than five thousand planets
Speaker 1: outside our Solar system. There's more of us. Do you
Speaker 1: think there's another morning show on another planet that's talking
Speaker 1: about the exact same thing right now? Just blew my mind.
Speaker 1: And a different study found our own galaxy might be
Speaker 1: older than we thought. Originally, researchers believed it was thirteen
Speaker 1: billion years old, but now it could be fourteen billion.
Speaker 1: Oh well, that's it does not want to be called
Speaker 1: fourteen billion, only off by one billion years, though that's
Speaker 1: pretty close. Scientists don't have to be that accurate, so
Speaker 1: I'm proud. This next laser story is out of the
Speaker 1: Buddy study of intimate buddies. Fifteen thousand people responded to
Speaker 1: the question do you guys have professions that you wouldn't date?
Speaker 1: And many weighed in. Number one on the list was
Speaker 1: law enforcement or military. I thought that it was by
Speaker 1: far the most popular answer and included uniformed officers, policemen, detectives,
Speaker 1: and soldiers. And there's a lot of various reasons for it,
Speaker 1: from the violent nature of the jobs, the odd hours
Speaker 1: they were I you're a snitch on my drugs. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's a lot of downsides. The next was influencer. Ye,
Speaker 1: the reason people aren't willing to date them is because
Speaker 1: their careers too unstable for their liking. And you're with
Speaker 1: an influencer their quote never not working. Yeah right, yeah,
Speaker 1: it sucks, but by yourself. Yeah, I see number three
Speaker 1: on the list of being undateable personal trainers. Yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: they're kind of obnoxious. Surprisingly, people weren't worried about them cheating.
Speaker 1: They just simply don't want to keep up with the
Speaker 1: healthy lifestyle. Even if they don't say it, they're judging
Speaker 1: you silently, you know. Absolutely, Last, but not least, is
Speaker 1: bank tellers. One user smartly pointed out, I have a
Speaker 1: fear if I date an associate from my bank, she'll
Speaker 1: clean me out in the event of my breakup error.
Speaker 1: If that's true. Breakups can be messy sometimes, boy, But
Speaker 1: you know, I guess hookups can be pretty messy too.
Speaker 1: And that's the sound of a turtle making an absolute
Speaker 1: mess inside of a payless Yeah, and I sell these
Speaker 1: lazy stories come to an end for the day. We'll
Speaker 1: do it again at the same time on Wednesday, Broke
Speaker 1: and Jeffrey in the morning.