Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of Trednesday Atoms.
Speaker 1: Shout up to Wednesday Atoms. Well, we'll close out the
Speaker 1: episode talking about that one but new series from the
Speaker 1: twisted mind of Tim Burton. Anyways, I'm Jack, that's Miles,
Speaker 1: and up top, we gotta talk about Papa John. Papa
Speaker 1: John is the number one trending thing across the morning,
Speaker 1: across this Wednesday morning, and it's because they've released the
Speaker 1: Papa John Bowl, which is not a bowl, neither a
Speaker 1: bowl nor a pizza it is. It's like a shallow
Speaker 1: dish with pizza toppings, uh in it. They're just like,
Speaker 1: you know, what the fuck is this? It's the downfalls civilization.
Speaker 1: Not this ship looks like it looks like a microwave
Speaker 1: like airplane tray. Yeah, it looks really bad like that.
Speaker 1: You know you're in trouble when they show you the
Speaker 1: product photo that you know they spent all all their time,
Speaker 1: millions of dollars crafting this image to make it look
Speaker 1: like something that someone might conceivably consume. And uh, no dice,
Speaker 1: no dice on this end, I don't understand what is
Speaker 1: there is there? There's you're just eating loose cheese, loose
Speaker 1: cheese and toppings in this case, Yo, it looks really bad.
Speaker 1: Even at my highest I've never been like, you know,
Speaker 1: be fucking amazing right now if I could scrape all
Speaker 1: the ship off the pizza and just eat a Google.
Speaker 1: Isn't that how Trump eats his pizza? Yeah? It is
Speaker 1: just he's just like I just like the cheese in
Speaker 1: this house. I mean, he's having a moment, a bit
Speaker 1: of a moment these past six years. These things look
Speaker 1: terrible though. They they truly look like they were constructed,
Speaker 1: Like the packaging was constructed out of hot pocket packaging,
Speaker 1: Like they were like, you know what people love is
Speaker 1: microwave hot pockets. But let's get rid of the pocket
Speaker 1: and just just the hot just the hot pocket puked
Speaker 1: into a bed pan um, and then we made it
Speaker 1: out of hot pocket packaging. Like okay, First of all,
Speaker 1: Danielle Winer Brawner at CNN Business, who wrote this, did
Speaker 1: you get paid to write this fucking article? Like it's
Speaker 1: written so uncritically of just like it reads like fucking
Speaker 1: spawn con like an ad. We're just like, hey, you
Speaker 1: s got they did away with everything that people didn't
Speaker 1: like and that it's all fun stuff, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean? One reason for the slowdown, people maybe getting
Speaker 1: tied of pizza. There's a general thought and then just
Speaker 1: like quotes uncritically the s VP of Menu Strategy, uh
Speaker 1: and Innovation at Papa John's. And then you get specifics
Speaker 1: three varieties, the fucking price point. How they're gonna make
Speaker 1: sure that it shows up to you hot and goopy
Speaker 1: the way you like it. But even the product photo
Speaker 1: doesn't look hot and goopy. Man, it looks terrible. It's confused.
Speaker 1: What I'm sorry, I can't This is like really fucking
Speaker 1: making me upset looking at this picture. It's not a
Speaker 1: fucking real thing. The idea that you'd write this and
Speaker 1: say to get people excited about pizza again. Papa John's
Speaker 1: is offering a new spin on the classic with Papa
Speaker 1: bowls that are all topping, no crust. This is like copy,
Speaker 1: This is ad copy, Well, Miles, what they're really going
Speaker 1: for Papa John's hooks new item will eliminate the veto
Speaker 1: vote when an eatery gets ruled out because it doesn't
Speaker 1: have enough options for everyone in the dining party. Um,
Speaker 1: and the thing that when somebody's like, I don't really
Speaker 1: feel like pizza. What they're usually saying is I feel
Speaker 1: like pizza. If you just scraped that ship off the
Speaker 1: top and put it into a hard plastic shell. The
Speaker 1: it's it's not good. This is this might be the
Speaker 1: most depressive. We've covered a lot of depressing news. Fun here,
Speaker 1: this might be this might we were just about to
Speaker 1: be peeking the massive uh you know, multi agency cover
Speaker 1: up that's happening around January six and all these deleted texts.
Speaker 1: I'm more upset somehow at this chicken Alfredo bowl. What
Speaker 1: that's not even pizza. I'm all right. So here's who's
Speaker 1: taken a nail here. Papa John obviously the head of
Speaker 1: what was it innovation, head of innovation of Papaca um
Speaker 1: CNN business. Oh my god, just like without any criticism.
Speaker 1: I hope the payday was good, is all I'll say.
Speaker 1: To see an m business who I will say, uh
Speaker 1: is winning here is Taco Bell because they managed to
Speaker 1: innovate and introduce new ideas time and again and never
Speaker 1: come up with something like this. It's funny how we're
Speaker 1: talking about like uncritical spawn con But yeah, we're like
Speaker 1: free promo. We're talking all the time. We're like yeah, man,
Speaker 1: they can't lose. They've never fucking lost. Okay, I'm sorry also,
Speaker 1: but but this is yeah like this this, we're true consumers,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. S VP of Menu Strategy
Speaker 1: and Innovation at Taco Bell is really doing it, and
Speaker 1: this fellow is not all right? Uh men, you is trending.
Speaker 1: Elon Musk is trending for the same reason you quickly
Speaker 1: disabused me of the notion that this story was worth
Speaker 1: my attention. Yeah, but it's worth me laughing at Manchester United,
Speaker 1: I think, you know, I do want to say that
Speaker 1: Manchester United was arguable. I mean as a brand, they're
Speaker 1: still one of the biggest, if not the biggest, you know,
Speaker 1: football club brand, you know what I mean, like next
Speaker 1: to Real Madrid or something, or Barcelona, like we just go,
Speaker 1: oh man you or Manchester United. They've had their season
Speaker 1: is starting off terribly. They got a new manager. Cristiano
Speaker 1: Ronaldo was playing with them, and he's so many He's like,
Speaker 1: you know, these people suck, suck. He's like, I don't
Speaker 1: even want to be here anymore. It's causing all these problems.
Speaker 1: The teams like fucking revolting in the locker room, the
Speaker 1: fans are so pissed. So Elon tweeted some shit about
Speaker 1: he's like, I like the left side of the Republican
Speaker 1: Party and the right side of the Democrat Party, and
Speaker 1: then like added a tweet below that he's like and
Speaker 1: also I'm gonna buy Manchester United. You're welcome. The fans
Speaker 1: were like, I don't know, Like, would you be opposed
Speaker 1: to this? Like that could be cool, you know Eon
Speaker 1: on his team, he might put his own money into it,
Speaker 1: and most like, bro, this is like the thing he
Speaker 1: always does, like the sports thing. He's gonna buy sports
Speaker 1: ball team. And then like hours later he's like, this
Speaker 1: is a running joke. Uh, but that didn't stop I
Speaker 1: think the mansion. The actual stock price of Manchester United
Speaker 1: went up a little bit after he said that, which
Speaker 1: I don't know that this is a cool story and
Speaker 1: not that the stock market is a complete fucking joke.
Speaker 1: Yeah that, Yeah, that it's a bunch of the most
Speaker 1: uncool person on the planet. Somewher was like, oh, what
Speaker 1: do you say? Yes, but an infusion of cash like
Speaker 1: that for man you could be I think we can
Speaker 1: all agree. Massive massive mate baby, Harry Kane, Harry Kane,
Speaker 1: massive mate in it. Uh, yeah, I don't know that
Speaker 1: it's wild there now, you know how like when you
Speaker 1: see a team like usually like they're in the running
Speaker 1: to get like the top picks in any sport, you're like,
Speaker 1: you know that that team doesn't play like that when
Speaker 1: they say they're going after somebody, it's always like the
Speaker 1: best in the business. They are now going to like,
Speaker 1: you know, second and third tier kind of players, and
Speaker 1: I think that has a that's a big like identity
Speaker 1: crisis for the supporters to or like we used to
Speaker 1: like when we knocked people fucking came. Now when we
Speaker 1: knock people turning the lights out in their house and
Speaker 1: acting like they're not there, can't answer the door. Is
Speaker 1: that Ronaldo is not second tier? Is he? No? I
Speaker 1: mean so that he came last season, they were like
Speaker 1: and it was like here we go, because this season
Speaker 1: before that they finished really close, you know, like the
Speaker 1: top three, and they're like, with the addition of Cristiano Ronaldo,
Speaker 1: like this could help. It was a total mess. He's
Speaker 1: like older, so he doesn't play like really defensively and
Speaker 1: it causes a lot of issues. So now he's just
Speaker 1: like sulking on the field, and that's never gonna that
Speaker 1: that usually doesn't get results, but anyway, not gonna work. Christiano, Uh,
Speaker 1: kid Cutty is trending. He and Kanye they're not working
Speaker 1: out their issues. Yeah, he he hadn't interview an Esquire recently,
Speaker 1: and he's just he's saying, like John funk with this guy,
Speaker 1: like the police just for separate people. He said quote
Speaker 1: when it comes to like, you know, Kandy even like
Speaker 1: who's back do you have? Blah blah bla said quote,
Speaker 1: I'm not one of your kids. I'm not Kim. It
Speaker 1: don't matter if I'm friends with Pete or not friends
Speaker 1: with Pete. If you can't be a grown man and
Speaker 1: deal with the fact that you lost your woman, that's
Speaker 1: not my fucking problem. M hm. So you know, it's
Speaker 1: it's wild to see how different like things went. Man
Speaker 1: like his Cutty was in a like real low place
Speaker 1: and he like really just he had to work on
Speaker 1: his mental health and stuff, and you could see him
Speaker 1: begin to kind of come out of his shell and
Speaker 1: like kind of begin to be uh creating at the
Speaker 1: level that he used to. And many people look at
Speaker 1: Kanye now and like did you see that thing of
Speaker 1: the all the bags in the gap store? About how
Speaker 1: like the Kanye the Easy Ship is supposed to be sold,
Speaker 1: Like I meant to talk about that. I'm glad you
Speaker 1: brought it up. Yeah. So Kanye has a a sub
Speaker 1: label on Gap where he's line of clothes and he
Speaker 1: is making them put them out in trash bags. Is
Speaker 1: that what I'm looking at? They look like industrial size,
Speaker 1: like garment bags. Were Like, nobody's lifting this. It just
Speaker 1: happens to be a fucking bag with back to the
Speaker 1: fucking guilt loose foodies. Yeah, exactly. Uh and apparently he
Speaker 1: saw the ship on Hangars. Not fuck that. I want
Speaker 1: people to there's no size or color organization. He just
Speaker 1: wants people to fucking tear through these bags and ship.
Speaker 1: M hm al right, Okay. The song they were both
Speaker 1: on on Push this album was good. Oh that was
Speaker 1: the last one last time? Who knows? Yeah, I don't,
Speaker 1: I don't know. It does feel like it's a pete thing, right,
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's just it's at this point it's
Speaker 1: like I'm really just tired. I'm just I'm like I
Speaker 1: feel like Laura Ingram with Trump. I'm like, I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: I can't okay, sorry, I can't do this I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: I can't do this, can you? All right, let's take
Speaker 1: a quick break. We'll be right back, and we're back,
Speaker 1: and Nancy Pelosi is trending this whild then fuck, I don't.
Speaker 1: Uh So, we have this report coming out that the
Speaker 1: Secret quote, the Secret Service, knew of a threat to
Speaker 1: Nancy Pelosi on January six, days before the insurrection, but
Speaker 1: did not pass it along until hours after the Capitol
Speaker 1: had been breached, according to Secret Service emails obtained by
Speaker 1: Crew What who is reporting this? This is like an
Speaker 1: ethics watchdog group? Crew damn um? So yeah, so they
Speaker 1: said on January four, they found to see a service
Speaker 1: found a parlor account that was posting a series of
Speaker 1: threats against her. Then like they were just all talking
Speaker 1: about here's the enemy, She's on this list. It's yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know, there's like it's a good afternoon. The
Speaker 1: U S Secret Services passing notification to the US Capital
Speaker 1: Police regarding discovery of social media threat directed towards Nancy Pelosi.
Speaker 1: But this happened a long time ago. So yeah, so
Speaker 1: like maybe a conspiracy. Maybe they were just like not
Speaker 1: trying to let anybody know. The Secret Service despite being
Speaker 1: the antagonist to Trump in one of the more vivid
Speaker 1: accounts of what happened on January six, where where he
Speaker 1: was like reaching for the steering wheel and all that ship. Um.
Speaker 1: They they have acquitted themselves very shadily. Uh. In a
Speaker 1: lot of the stories around January six, deleted a bunch
Speaker 1: of evidence, and we're just I feel like we're just
Speaker 1: waiting to see what the what the story is there?
Speaker 1: I know, and that's why I'm like, God, who knows
Speaker 1: what's in those fucking fifteen boxes of documents and ship?
Speaker 1: Considering that the Secret Service like, okay, well we deleted
Speaker 1: everything on our side. Looks like a big stinky ship pile. Um,
Speaker 1: will we find out what happened? Who knows? Lebron is
Speaker 1: trending signing big money, big money, big money, big money,
Speaker 1: No wammy, no wammy. What would he? What do he
Speaker 1: signed for? It's like two million or two years two million?
Speaker 1: I heard it was for two million dollars. He's being
Speaker 1: a real stand up guy, this Lebron James saying, you
Speaker 1: know how much more money can a guy have? But no,
Speaker 1: like it's like something like ninety eight million. You can
Speaker 1: go up to a hundred eleven million um over two years,
Speaker 1: so it makes him the hot like the most guaranteed
Speaker 1: money player. He This puts him above Kevin Durant. Now,
Speaker 1: I still can't conceive of what a hundred eleven million
Speaker 1: looks like in my mind or how that would if
Speaker 1: you have so much money that you're lebron Go Okay, cool,
Speaker 1: ninety seven million? Okay, great, great, thank you. Let me
Speaker 1: just write that down in my ledger. Okay, thank you. Nice? Nice,
Speaker 1: nice people are everybody's like, you know, now, all the
Speaker 1: conversations are around, like will he get the Lakers to
Speaker 1: draft his son Ronnie, who we as we talked about recently,
Speaker 1: had a pretty exciting highlight where he seemed to uh
Speaker 1: float in through the air and like while like passing
Speaker 1: by the basket, like okay, and I'll put this right
Speaker 1: here while I fly by the basket and yeah. So
Speaker 1: so now people are like, well, this would put him
Speaker 1: past the season where his son would be eligible to
Speaker 1: enter the draft. So I don't know. I still feel
Speaker 1: like it's very rare for anybody to be good enough
Speaker 1: to go straight from high school to the draft. Imagine,
Speaker 1: and we funk up our draft picks, drafting Brawnie to
Speaker 1: make Lebron happy. I'm like, let's saying earlier. I'm like,
Speaker 1: I I love the sentiment, but I'm ruthless. The Lakers
Speaker 1: is not for take your kid to work day, right,
Speaker 1: you know, and look, look unless he has some really
Speaker 1: ridiculous development. But I don't know. I mean, like, good
Speaker 1: for Lebron James. A lot of people look, well, you're
Speaker 1: tied to him forever. But yeah, let me come on,
Speaker 1: let's get another banner, then let's go. Wednesday is trending
Speaker 1: not just because that's what day it is. It's trending
Speaker 1: because that is the name of a new series dropping
Speaker 1: from the sick, twisted, truly fucked up mind of Tim Burton.
Speaker 1: It's uh, it's Wednesday, Adams's Adams based series. Um, and
Speaker 1: it looks fun. It looks like us cool. I mean,
Speaker 1: Adam's Family really hit me. Um, you were saying to
Speaker 1: hit you when you were like the right age. So
Speaker 1: I might have been a little bit too old to
Speaker 1: enjoy it as much as I did, but I really
Speaker 1: loved that ship. I saw both those movies in the theaters. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean what Adam's Family Values came out nine three,
Speaker 1: that was a sequel. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm nine, but you know I had like the taste
Speaker 1: of a thirteen year old. You know you feel me,
Speaker 1: but I really Yeah, And the first one came out
Speaker 1: nine one, right, I just loved I thought they were
Speaker 1: so fun. I really liked the second one. Uh they're
Speaker 1: all they're all just they're just super goofy. But yeah,
Speaker 1: the trailer looks it's it's funny. How like how powerful
Speaker 1: the image of Wednesday Adam's silhouette is. It's just seeing
Speaker 1: like dark pigtails creep down a hallway and they're really
Speaker 1: like using that visual to like be like, yo, don't
Speaker 1: sunk with her? Of that the high school she attends
Speaker 1: briefly and is kicked out of his Nancy Reagan high School.
Speaker 1: That's very fun. Um. Louise Guzman as Gomez is not like,
Speaker 1: that's not straightforward, That's not who I would have pictured,
Speaker 1: But it's fun. It's a lot of fun. Follows the
Speaker 1: you know, the long tradition of Gomez Adams being portrayed
Speaker 1: by people of like Puerto Rican and Tran ancestry. I
Speaker 1: want to say, who's the first one? John Asketon and
Speaker 1: then Raoul Julia Been, Raul Julia Luis Guzman very just
Speaker 1: Luise Skuzman's energy is different from Raul Julius. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: it's always gonna be like he's a very one note
Speaker 1: kind of guy. Yeah, but it's fun. Yeah yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: And like I don't mind seeing that in a Gomez
Speaker 1: Adam suit. Come with it, Louise, come with it. This
Speaker 1: also like just put it. Put the question in my mind,
Speaker 1: like how did Tim Burton not direct the Adams Family
Speaker 1: movies in the first place. I guess I'm glad he
Speaker 1: didn't because he knocked those out of the park, But
Speaker 1: it feels like they were both peaking at the same
Speaker 1: time you would have expected, But I guess he would.
Speaker 1: He was making Batman Returns at the time that he
Speaker 1: would have been making the Adams Family movies. But what
Speaker 1: af fusing of uh franchise and just like just the sickest, darkest, twisted,
Speaker 1: most messed up mind. Uh. I don't know. Maybe he
Speaker 1: still gotta fastball hitting up his sleeve. She has a
Speaker 1: piranhas bite someone dick off in the in the trailer,
Speaker 1: so that's cool. Oh, I got it. Runk the guy
Speaker 1: who played the original John Aston in the that version.
Speaker 1: They said Gomez was of Castilian in Spanish ancestry, and
Speaker 1: then Rabul Julia uh Puerto Rican and then like when
Speaker 1: they announced this, people are being like it might have
Speaker 1: Johnny Depp in it, so oh yeah, yeah, that would
Speaker 1: be well because Johnny Depp is actually part I don't
Speaker 1: know if you knew that. He's part Native American, part
Speaker 1: Puerto Rican, part part part part and part leather bracelet,
Speaker 1: part motorcycle, part yeah, part Pinot Noir, Adams family. M M, yeah,
Speaker 1: I can't, can you. I think I want to start
Speaker 1: keeping a ranking of like the people I would at
Speaker 1: least want to hang out with for a day, and
Speaker 1: I think Johnny Depp might be number one on that list. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think in general, anyone who's a scumbag based on
Speaker 1: smell and how interesting he thinks he is um in
Speaker 1: ratio to how boring. Anyway, those are so of the
Speaker 1: things that are trending on this Wednesday afternoon. We are
Speaker 1: back tomorrow with the whole last episode of the show.
Speaker 1: Until then, be kind to each other, be kind to yourself,
Speaker 1: get the vaccine, don't do nothing about white supremacy, and
Speaker 1: we will talk to y'all. Smart bit