Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to Season to fourteen, episode
Speaker 1: four of Day Guys production of My Heart Radio. This
Speaker 1: is a podcast where we take a deep dive and
Speaker 1: do America's shared consciousness. It is Thursday, just ever not
Speaker 1: National Pastry Day? Who is not happy to celebrate National
Speaker 1: Pastry Day? What one of those things that almost you
Speaker 1: would think doesn't need a national day because we're we're
Speaker 1: all pretty right, yeah, we're all pretty aware of pastries,
Speaker 1: were all, we're all fans. But you would think that
Speaker 1: and that National Pastry Day comes and you're like, never mind,
Speaker 1: this is this is the best. Also Christmas Card Day.
Speaker 1: I thought that was Christmas, but I am wrong. My
Speaker 1: name is Jack O'Brien a k jes Lane. Maxwell has
Speaker 1: a hammer falled down upon her head. Too bad? Maxwell?
Speaker 1: Is this gay goat? Now that Epstein is dead? Whoa? Alright?
Speaker 1: That's courtesy and Matt Dick Magic though on Twitter and
Speaker 1: shout out to the Beatles documentary which informed us, which
Speaker 1: made me feel good for always hating that song because
Speaker 1: it was apparently the worst recording process of all time. Well,
Speaker 1: I am thrilled to be joined as always by my
Speaker 1: co host Mr Miles Grab the Time is right, got
Speaker 1: a joint and light simply having a wonderful spliff mess
Speaker 1: time and shout out to an aimic you the ak
Speaker 1: a goddess ourselves an assaultis I sees you on discord
Speaker 1: uh and just keeping that Beatles theme going. Although you
Speaker 1: know that's what that's the palum McCartney. The thing that
Speaker 1: I grew up hearing adults say that's just crap. That
Speaker 1: sounds just crap. That's what you learned from the documentary
Speaker 1: is that Maxwell Silverhammer is like a McCartney joint that
Speaker 1: everybody in the band thought was like very corny, and
Speaker 1: he was like, no, no, no no, you have to you
Speaker 1: have to like then we'll we'll hit this thing and
Speaker 1: it'll like sound cool. And and then after the filming
Speaker 1: of the documentary they did the Abbey Road sessions and
Speaker 1: apparently it was the song that broke up the band,
Speaker 1: or did the most break up the band. Anyways, Miles,
Speaker 1: we are thrilled to be joined in our third seat
Speaker 1: by one of the greatest stand ups, funniest podcasters doing
Speaker 1: it anywhere. You've seen her on HBO's Two Do Queens
Speaker 1: and heard her on her podcast Dork Forrest and the
Speaker 1: Jackie and LORI show, please welcome the brilliant, the talented
Speaker 1: Jackie Kasha. Yeah, well what's up? And I will not
Speaker 1: be breaking into song by by loss their loss. Some
Speaker 1: say love now just a straight down the middle straight love.
Speaker 1: It coming to us from what what part of the
Speaker 1: cursed landscape? God's green Earth? It is? Uh, we're talking Hollywood, Hollywood, Florida,
Speaker 1: where weirdly enough, it looks like carrion birds are floating
Speaker 1: in the sky. I wish you, I wonder if you
Speaker 1: can see him. But it's not good. It's not good.
Speaker 1: And then there's uh, but there's a lot of music
Speaker 1: themed art. I'm surrounded and I don't know anything about me,
Speaker 1: Like I know, I listen to music. I'm not a monster,
Speaker 1: but I don't like I'm not. I haven't watched that documentary.
Speaker 1: There's a giant picture downstairs that I just tweeted. I said,
Speaker 1: I think it's a heavy metal. I know he's hugely famous.
Speaker 1: He's wearing a bandana as a hat. I don't know
Speaker 1: who he is, and everybody feel free to guess. And
Speaker 1: then in two hours, when I'm done with the zeit geist,
Speaker 1: I will post a picture and you all go, how
Speaker 1: can you not know that My favorite type of genre
Speaker 1: of music themed art is things that are shaped as
Speaker 1: like musical instruments. Right, and you were sharing before recorded
Speaker 1: that you are in fact in a hotel shape like
Speaker 1: a guitar. Yeah, and you know those uh you know
Speaker 1: when when they line up like cattle to check into
Speaker 1: a hotel, the posts are all guitars. Everything is a guitar. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like for like that kind of thing. But it isn't
Speaker 1: that like way more of a top. Yeah. It's so
Speaker 1: this whole thing is a footprint. It's the devil's thumb.
Speaker 1: It is sticking out of the everglades or where the
Speaker 1: hell I am like like like a giant footprint. This
Speaker 1: thing when when the aliens come and be like, oh
Speaker 1: they didn't like this planet at all, so they were
Speaker 1: trying to kill it. This is giant knife into the art.
Speaker 1: The art in my room is something and it does
Speaker 1: I showed, but of course it's a hotel art, so
Speaker 1: it's of course nailed to the wall. But it's guitar
Speaker 1: picks like stuff. Yes, very cool. Nothing is more metal,
Speaker 1: nothing is more rock and roll than things shaped like
Speaker 1: guitar hotel mass made hotel art. It's like macaroni art,
Speaker 1: but with guitar. Yes, that's exactly what we're talking about.
Speaker 1: I think my lamp is a drum. Oh yeah, that's
Speaker 1: like just gotta be so weird. You're like, is it
Speaker 1: my lamps a drum? The toilet's a drum stool? Like,
Speaker 1: look at one of those symbol hats instead of a
Speaker 1: fridge or whatever. Yeah, that that would be what they
Speaker 1: served the burger in is like the oh yeah, there's
Speaker 1: the high hat and there's a burger on side. Because
Speaker 1: it's if they aren't doing that, they're actually leaving money
Speaker 1: on the table. That's right. And I'm guessing the elevator
Speaker 1: is just rife with rock quotes. Right, there's something going on.
Speaker 1: I don't know what's happening except for no one with masks.
Speaker 1: That's what we know. A lot of people, a lot
Speaker 1: of things not happening here in Florida. My favorite philosopher,
Speaker 1: Eric Clapton has always said, you don't need that, you
Speaker 1: don't need that fucking mask. Don't don't let the government
Speaker 1: and tell you what to do. I had a moment
Speaker 1: at l a X yesterday. I tweeted about it, but
Speaker 1: it was I was in an elevator going up to
Speaker 1: the Delta sky Club. I traveled a lot, you guys.
Speaker 1: I'm in the Deulta skylu It's very glamorous anyway. It's
Speaker 1: a tiny elevator, me, two other middle aged women and
Speaker 1: an older man. Demographic just you know. The man's middle
Speaker 1: Eastern might be uh Arabic or Armenian or something. I'm Armenian,
Speaker 1: so I can almost tell. And then there's an Asian
Speaker 1: woman and another middle aged white lady and we're all
Speaker 1: going up this elevator. We're packed like sardines, and but
Speaker 1: we're all wearing masks. And I make the jope that
Speaker 1: I make now in a packed elevator, which is we're
Speaker 1: packed in here like it's I'm not saying it's super funny,
Speaker 1: but sometimes it'll get a laugh. And I'm a desperate,
Speaker 1: desperate comedian, so I get a laugh. And then the
Speaker 1: guy says, this is all ridiculous. You know, this is
Speaker 1: it's just a plot, just hell yeah, giant silence buzzkiller
Speaker 1: on on the inside this tiny, tiny elevator. And we
Speaker 1: were all shocked, and so I just said back, you
Speaker 1: didn't want to stay living And then the doors open
Speaker 1: and he walks out and he goes, I get to
Speaker 1: say that, you know, it's freedom of speech, and I
Speaker 1: get to it. I said me too, Man, Look what
Speaker 1: we just did. You said something, I said something, the
Speaker 1: whole thing, And then I lived in hope that he
Speaker 1: wasn't going to the sky glube away. All right, Jackie,
Speaker 1: we're gonna get to know you a little bit better
Speaker 1: in a moment. First, a couple of things we're talking
Speaker 1: about today. We're gonna talk about mouse movers, which is
Speaker 1: just a little a little piece of you know, it's
Speaker 1: like a souvenir from the hell world that we live
Speaker 1: in that we could like bring if we could bring
Speaker 1: it back to ourselves in twenty nineteen, we would all like,
Speaker 1: what's that? Yeah, oh no, what we're gonna talk about
Speaker 1: Patriot Front. So we're gonna check in with like a
Speaker 1: lot of these these stories. I even felt for one,
Speaker 1: the Christmas shortages, you know, Santa's or there's a short
Speaker 1: Santa shortage, there's a Christmas tree shortage, rush out and
Speaker 1: get your Christmas trees and you're in home Santa's I
Speaker 1: guess before they run out. Turns out that's all bullshit.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna talk about that. All of that plenty more.
Speaker 1: But first, Jackie, we do like to ask our guess
Speaker 1: what is something from your search history? I googled the
Speaker 1: thing yesterday because I gotta I don't know if you
Speaker 1: guys know this, but on everyone's favorite ant and so
Speaker 1: I get a lot of questions via text, some business related,
Speaker 1: just nothing funnier than that, because I'm not great at
Speaker 1: this business, but I guess I'm better at it than
Speaker 1: other comics. So and I'm willing to answer a question.
Speaker 1: And uh, and like every comic, I will at least
Speaker 1: have an opinion even without the information. So I made
Speaker 1: a joke in a in a text chain for the
Speaker 1: comic that he didn't get the joke, and I realized
Speaker 1: that it was a reference to a hacky premise from
Speaker 1: the eighties, from the nineteen eighties in stand up comedy,
Speaker 1: And so I googled who said many parts of a
Speaker 1: pine tree are edible? And uh? It was a grape
Speaker 1: nuts commercial from the seventies with a guy named you
Speaker 1: Will Givens, and You'll given said in this weird, weird
Speaker 1: grape nuts commercial, many parts of a pine tree edible?
Speaker 1: And for twenty years after that, from the seventies through
Speaker 1: the early nineties. It was one of the hackiest premises
Speaker 1: on the road stand up comedy wise, So how how
Speaker 1: what was the what are the derivations off of that? That? Well? That?
Speaker 1: How was it used? It? Sometimes it was a throwaway line,
Speaker 1: just a tag. Sometimes they would change it. Many parts
Speaker 1: of a pine tree in edible, they would say, sometimes
Speaker 1: many parts of a pine tree are fuckable. You guys,
Speaker 1: write that down because that's that's good times. That's just
Speaker 1: good writing anyway, because they both haven't able anyway. It
Speaker 1: was terrible things where there was trouble, is what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: It was a weird commercial. I don't blame them, but
Speaker 1: that is the last thing that was interesting that I googled.
Speaker 1: This is it's a quote from the father of modern foraging.
Speaker 1: Right he was he was a weird eating guy from
Speaker 1: the seventies. What a what a strange time? Like I've
Speaker 1: I've looked at well, like could you imagine like General
Speaker 1: Mills featuring like somebody who's like a a freaking in
Speaker 1: one of their commercials or even Rick Steve's. I mean,
Speaker 1: it would be like would be like that, Yeah, what
Speaker 1: what does it say? What's this intersection of brands that
Speaker 1: I'm seeing right now when advertising was just a little worse.
Speaker 1: But grape nuts is weird, so like the people who
Speaker 1: eat grape nuts are weird, right. I grew up as
Speaker 1: part of the grape nuts family and it was weird.
Speaker 1: We yogurt and grape nuts was like a thing in
Speaker 1: my family. And it's a bad it's a bad snack.
Speaker 1: And what does it? Feels like child abuse? Well what
Speaker 1: is it even? Because I remember as a kid like
Speaker 1: going through the cereal, I'm like, that looks like shit
Speaker 1: and it's two words I don't like. So let's go
Speaker 1: on to rice crispy streets cereal. But like, what is
Speaker 1: grape nuts even? It's not it, it's it seemed to be.
Speaker 1: I think it's a baked grain, is what I think
Speaker 1: it is. I think it's a weak thing, Like have
Speaker 1: you ever eaten we Topix is sort of the fun
Speaker 1: version of grape nuts and isn't fun? I like we
Speaker 1: to pix, but that's because I put a lot of
Speaker 1: fruit on it with my milk. But yeah, grape nuts
Speaker 1: seems like it is the result of a bet between
Speaker 1: like some giant like food barons of like I bet
Speaker 1: I can get people to eat just the worst like
Speaker 1: essentially gravel. It is. It is so bad in your mouth.
Speaker 1: There's like one and a half seconds where the aftercaste
Speaker 1: is like pretty good. And I think that's what it's
Speaker 1: been coasting on. But also, like grape and nuts are
Speaker 1: two words that are advertising to people. We like, grapefruit
Speaker 1: has been coasting off having the word grape in it
Speaker 1: for so long, even though it tastes like ship grape nuts, grapefruit.
Speaker 1: I'm not made of stone over here, right, I actually
Speaker 1: do like grapefruit, but like my kids, but yeah, my
Speaker 1: kids reaction to grapefruit is like that this tastes horrible,
Speaker 1: but I think it gets a lot of points just
Speaker 1: based on the name. Yeah, it's not It's definitely not fork.
Speaker 1: It's that's for sure. Like I remember in my house
Speaker 1: we had a great fruit tree that like every adult
Speaker 1: would really like. Whenever they came off and I had
Speaker 1: to go pick them and like bring them back, people
Speaker 1: would never like, oh I love your grapefruits. They're just
Speaker 1: the flavor is so good. I could never understand it.
Speaker 1: So I was like twenty three, and I was like, oh, right,
Speaker 1: it's not just that it has to taste like juice,
Speaker 1: and that's there are other dimensions of flavor that can
Speaker 1: be positive. Yeah, yes, I don't know what it is
Speaker 1: about about becoming an adult and being able to have
Speaker 1: like a nuance to palate. But when you're a kid,
Speaker 1: you're just like, now I just want to fruit, roll up,
Speaker 1: leave me alone. Yeah, yeah, what is something you think
Speaker 1: is overrated? I was torn between n f T s
Speaker 1: and cryptocurrency one and the same. Really, right, they feel like,
Speaker 1: I mean, money itself is such an illusion, but this
Speaker 1: is like the illusion of the illusion. And you're like, okay,
Speaker 1: all right, I get it, all right, You're bored. There's
Speaker 1: like the have so much money that you're like, oh
Speaker 1: but I just I'm the only one that has this
Speaker 1: picture of this thing. And you're like, I don't understand.
Speaker 1: Go outside. Yeah. Yeah, like a boring satirist is writing
Speaker 1: reality now, Like somebody who's trying to satirize the fact
Speaker 1: that money is nothing. It's a Mark Twain automaton. It's
Speaker 1: like something's going horribly a right, there's a Tracy Alloway
Speaker 1: tweeted a couple of days ago, as it do this.
Speaker 1: It just saw someone described crypto as Mary Kay for
Speaker 1: young men, and now I'm dying. Oh, my god, that
Speaker 1: stuck the landing nice. I mean, there's I also saw
Speaker 1: recently this clip, this viral clip of a guy at
Speaker 1: a party who was displaying an n f T he
Speaker 1: owned on a backpack, Like I had a backpack with
Speaker 1: like an LED screen on it, and it was just
Speaker 1: like rotating this like n f T gift that he owned,
Speaker 1: and it was just like, what the fuck? I'm part
Speaker 1: of this is that never get gain traction. But I
Speaker 1: don't know if I'm just an older person watching like
Speaker 1: a wave crest and I'm like, and now I have
Speaker 1: my Eledy backpack for them, right, well, Fannie packs are back.
Speaker 1: So how who am I to judge? I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm I yeah, I mean, I I get it. It's
Speaker 1: like it's it's certainly. My friend Karmen Morales does this
Speaker 1: joke about how only rich people are the ones who
Speaker 1: want to downsize, who want to clear out all their
Speaker 1: stuff because they could buy it again when they want.
Speaker 1: Arvin Morales, you guys go find her, yeah, because it
Speaker 1: just feels like more crap where I mean, I do
Speaker 1: I have nonsense. I have, I have, you know, rooms
Speaker 1: full of just stuff, but I can't imagine it all
Speaker 1: falls apart. That's how overrated it is, like blown away. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think and and also like looking at all the
Speaker 1: ways like n f t s are just especially n
Speaker 1: f t is has been abused to high hell, like
Speaker 1: in terms of like how did some someone about a
Speaker 1: sixty dollar picture of a yacht? You're like, this couldn't
Speaker 1: be more like like a transparent form of like some
Speaker 1: kind of money laundering than like I really don't see
Speaker 1: any reason why, Like yeah, dude, this picture of a yacht,
Speaker 1: uh six fifty put down on it could have been
Speaker 1: a home about this gift anyway. Wow. I do think
Speaker 1: like the blockchain is cool. It's a cool concept. It's like,
Speaker 1: what makes it cool? Explain it to me, make it cool.
Speaker 1: It's basically a online record or just like a digital
Speaker 1: record of everything that has happened to a given like
Speaker 1: document or you know, the thing that's being sold. It's
Speaker 1: just the n f T s and and it's dispersed,
Speaker 1: which is like what I think is cool. It's not
Speaker 1: like centrally held by a bank or something. It's the
Speaker 1: reason that it is irrevocable is because it's like the
Speaker 1: second it's out there, everybody has access to that and
Speaker 1: everybody has a copy of it. So it's just like
Speaker 1: blockchain is just a current word for providence. Yeah in
Speaker 1: a way, yeah, yeah, Okay, Well it's just because I
Speaker 1: was like, what does it even? What does it mean? Blockchain?
Speaker 1: But now I know, Now I know what it means.
Speaker 1: It gets a slippery though, too, like with the decentralized stuff,
Speaker 1: because now you're already seeing how it can be can decentralize,
Speaker 1: whether informally or formally like in exchanges or just with
Speaker 1: people who are have owned a ton of a certain crypto.
Speaker 1: So I know, yeah, that's what That's what makes it
Speaker 1: I think such a wild West moment where I think
Speaker 1: people are still trying to find like, there's a lot
Speaker 1: there's some stuff that I can it's usable. There are
Speaker 1: other things that people are completely just you know, running
Speaker 1: wild with it. But yeah, there's a cool concept in there,
Speaker 1: and everything that's being done with it is very stupid anyway.
Speaker 1: So by sight coin, guys, it's on a coin miles,
Speaker 1: we're not dropping that yet, right. We gotta we gotta
Speaker 1: get a bunch, we gotta get that artists to create
Speaker 1: the gift that will be attached to it. Jackie, what
Speaker 1: is something you think is underrated. So many things, so
Speaker 1: many things are under ended. Everything everyone loves, right, like,
Speaker 1: people love different things that nobody else loves. But there's
Speaker 1: but there's you know, because there's eight billion people on
Speaker 1: the planet that that there there's so like, some people
Speaker 1: love horror movies and I do not. I do not,
Speaker 1: but I respect that they that they like horror movies.
Speaker 1: And I've recently found out that what people what some
Speaker 1: people love about and this was an episode of The
Speaker 1: Dork Forest, is that is that what people love about
Speaker 1: horror movies is that they have a lot of anxiety,
Speaker 1: and sometimes watching a horror movie can bleed off that anxiety.
Speaker 1: And I was like, how is that even possible? It
Speaker 1: should make you more scared? It makes me more scared anyone.
Speaker 1: So I would say in my for me, things that
Speaker 1: are underrated that people don't appreciate are literally romance novels.
Speaker 1: Hey gravcation over here telling me about romance novels. Been
Speaker 1: reading them since junior high and they make me there.
Speaker 1: I mean, there's so many they're they're they're like comic
Speaker 1: books and stand up comedy in the way that there's
Speaker 1: they're written for everybody and by everybody. Yeah, like they're
Speaker 1: written by every race, every religion, every gender, every sexuality,
Speaker 1: and you know some of you know, a lot of them.
Speaker 1: You know, the mocking of them is valid because a
Speaker 1: lot of them are poorly written, but some of them
Speaker 1: are not. And but there's historical, there's paranormal, there's there's
Speaker 1: a cowboy ones at my great aunt loves, I mean,
Speaker 1: there's it's so crantastic that it can be anything. And
Speaker 1: the ones that I read are read sort of historical.
Speaker 1: And that is in finger quotes because did you see Britain.
Speaker 1: I was just gonna ask you what your thoughts on
Speaker 1: brit because that has been like the breakthrough of you know,
Speaker 1: romance novel culture, right produced it? Yeah, Okay, she quite
Speaker 1: honestly nailed the vibe of them, which is dumb and
Speaker 1: hilarious and kind of sweet and also kind of epically
Speaker 1: socio political, you know, like Britain. I weirdly enough, had
Speaker 1: read those books prior to it coming out, which is
Speaker 1: weird all by itself, such a random thing. Julia Quinn.
Speaker 1: So we're in the heart of lockdown, right, we're deep lockdown,
Speaker 1: looking for something to watch, and I was like, what
Speaker 1: is this? And so we put it on I live
Speaker 1: in a small hole house with my husband, so there
Speaker 1: it's on the television. He's watching it and he's like,
Speaker 1: how can she not know what sex is? And I
Speaker 1: was like, Wow, I don't know if you know about
Speaker 1: the educational situation of women prior about nineteen sixty, so
Speaker 1: like literally sixty years ago, seventy years ago, tab a
Speaker 1: slat a never mentioned, right, I mean if you lived
Speaker 1: out like there was no idea, like nobody nobody was
Speaker 1: given directions and uh. And so the fact that she
Speaker 1: didn't know he's accurate. And it's so funny about romance
Speaker 1: novels in the way that there that they really um
Speaker 1: some of them do do this weird reframing, but there
Speaker 1: you know, more and more like history of like women
Speaker 1: will come out because nobody ever wrote anything about it
Speaker 1: because women didn't get published. So you assume that women
Speaker 1: were just in the house breeding and doing dishes and
Speaker 1: getting sandwiches for people. But it turns out back in
Speaker 1: the way back day is they were like women doctors
Speaker 1: and women lawyers and women scholars and translators and and
Speaker 1: all that all kinds of stuff. So maybe the historical
Speaker 1: romans novels are speculative fiction in the way that they
Speaker 1: talk about Heroin's right, but maybe they're also channeling some
Speaker 1: sort of the history that was never written. So that's
Speaker 1: what I think is underrated at that genre. I mean,
Speaker 1: in general, I think more and more people are beginning
Speaker 1: to real us how powerful it is and how popular
Speaker 1: is Have you been to the Ripped Bodice in Culver City, Yes,
Speaker 1: I have. They do stand they do have a standum
Speaker 1: show right right, and like so, and then you know
Speaker 1: they're they're like to the point where Sony TV, Sony
Speaker 1: Pictures TV, they signed an overall deal, Like these owners
Speaker 1: of a romance only bookstore signed an overall deal with
Speaker 1: Sony Pictures TV off the strength of their knowledge of
Speaker 1: the genre, which is like really interesting to me. And
Speaker 1: I think I think goes to show how much even now,
Speaker 1: like at the higher levels of production, that is coming
Speaker 1: into focus, realizing how much of a popular genre is.
Speaker 1: Here's the fun fact that a lot of people don't
Speaker 1: know is that the reason why romance novels are sold
Speaker 1: in grocery stores is because women would get a grocery
Speaker 1: budget and they could hide their book purchases from their
Speaker 1: husbands in the fifties and sixties. Yeah, yeah, absolutely, Like
Speaker 1: what's a good starter for people who like Briton? Yeah,
Speaker 1: like a if you wanted a historical room, you know.
Speaker 1: Lorraine Newman actually emailed Beach was like, you read these things.
Speaker 1: I've never read these things. You got something for me?
Speaker 1: And so I turned her onto a series that is
Speaker 1: actually kind of adorable and pretty good sexy times. The
Speaker 1: author's name is Stephanie Lawrence. You guys, Miles Jack Stephanie
Speaker 1: Lawrence and uh and it's the first one. I think
Speaker 1: it's called Devil's Bride. Why wouldn't it Why wouldn't it
Speaker 1: be called Devil's Bride? And uh? And there's the first
Speaker 1: six books. They're actually really good. The next twelve are okay.
Speaker 1: I think the six after that are hit and miss.
Speaker 1: And here's the thing about romance writers as well, is
Speaker 1: they have to write two or three books so gear
Speaker 1: to make a living because the money is really good
Speaker 1: at the publisher level, but not at the author level. Right,
Speaker 1: So it's like the right or just like when people
Speaker 1: buy scripts for like Lifetime or Hallmark movies or that's it.
Speaker 1: People are buying them, but they're seven grand up pop,
Speaker 1: so are they seven grand because a friend of mine
Speaker 1: has one coming out to Scember nineteen. Jennifer jen Kirkman,
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I think Berkman might command a better price
Speaker 1: than it's. Well. I did back to back episodes last
Speaker 1: December year ago to the small of about Hallmark Christmas
Speaker 1: movies because I don't have cable, so I've never seen them,
Speaker 1: and but I assumed that they are romance novels. In
Speaker 1: the hour and a half four But jen Kirkman did
Speaker 1: Hallmark Hallmark movies, and my brother Russ did Hallmark movies.
Speaker 1: My brother Rust is an eCOM professor, and he had
Speaker 1: spreadsheets because he loves he the guy is a is
Speaker 1: a marshmallow of the dude when it comes to movies.
Speaker 1: But this the spreadsheet was how much the budgets were,
Speaker 1: who where they were shot, who directed them, And most
Speaker 1: of the budget goes to the women actress who is
Speaker 1: the league, and the rest of the budget is split
Speaker 1: among the crew and the rest and the guys always changed.
Speaker 1: The women are off will often get like a six
Speaker 1: picture deal. But the guys, but my brother's like y
Speaker 1: all look like the same guy, you know, they're just
Speaker 1: sort of a six ft six ft two brown haired
Speaker 1: guy with regular features. And I was like, that sounds handsome,
Speaker 1: that sounds like that adult man. Wait six mont two
Speaker 1: regular guy Whitey magoose. And he also I think he
Speaker 1: has a column for when anything that isn't a straight
Speaker 1: white guy is a bold and because he broke it down,
Speaker 1: he loves his spreadsheet. He's an ECU. Yeah, I love
Speaker 1: some facts. All right, Well, if you if you like Bridgton,
Speaker 1: go check out the works of Stephanie Lawrence. You can
Speaker 1: Stephanie Lawrence with an But here's the thing you also,
Speaker 1: to some extent, it's like a suggesting porn for people. Sure,
Speaker 1: I mean you're like, do you like stepmother stuff? Well,
Speaker 1: there's a website. What you want to do? Is you
Speaker 1: want to go? I mean, is there always so? Like
Speaker 1: The thing that I think stuck out to a lot
Speaker 1: of people was in Bridgeton there was a large plot
Speaker 1: about the male lead always pulling out like, which is
Speaker 1: kind of sexually graphic to be a plot point I
Speaker 1: think for for like a high is that is that
Speaker 1: typical of romance novels to like have a sexually graphic
Speaker 1: sort of plot. For a while, it was about page
Speaker 1: one five that they would the sex scene would happen
Speaker 1: in a book of about three hundred pages, so there
Speaker 1: would be usually some sort of touchy touchy business right
Speaker 1: around paget, and then about one forty five they get
Speaker 1: laid and then they'd spend the last half misunderstanding each
Speaker 1: other and then finally doing it again, or they spend
Speaker 1: the whole middle of the book just doing it, doing it,
Speaker 1: doing it, doing it, some small misunderstanding than reconciliation. It's
Speaker 1: one of the greatest things about romance novels. Turns out
Speaker 1: there's always in a happy ending, and both for him
Speaker 1: and for us. There you go, all right, well, let's
Speaker 1: take a quick break and we will come back and
Speaker 1: talk about some news stories. And we're back, and the
Speaker 1: hottest new souvenir from the year is the mouse Mover,
Speaker 1: which is how you trick your boss into thinking you're
Speaker 1: still at your desk because that is important to them. Apparently. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's uh, we've seen it. The this like
Speaker 1: obsession has gone from you know, well, like bosses now
Speaker 1: in the work from home era seem to be more
Speaker 1: focused on things like if you're present rather than if
Speaker 1: you're productive. Because we've seen all this stuff, like every
Speaker 1: single study that's come out of like the lockdowns, and
Speaker 1: things have shown for people who have been able to
Speaker 1: work from home, you know, despite the stresses that it
Speaker 1: caused from if you're going from just a brutally pro
Speaker 1: productivity centric analysis, productivity has gone up and output has increased.
Speaker 1: Yet there's still this is like just fucking evil, like
Speaker 1: insistence on being like, well, what's going on you do
Speaker 1: when you're sleeping at at noon for twenty minutes even
Speaker 1: though you're also teaching kids like algebra in the other
Speaker 1: room caused so much stress. And I think that's why
Speaker 1: we've seen the rise of what men you call boss wear,
Speaker 1: which are just different programs that are intended to track
Speaker 1: worker activity. And it's just gone up more and more
Speaker 1: and more, and you see it in things like you
Speaker 1: know a lot of people have found that they'll use
Speaker 1: you know, apps like teams or slack and on some instances,
Speaker 1: based on if you have like a computer owned by
Speaker 1: a company, they can put software in there that says like, oh,
Speaker 1: if your mouse isn't moving for like a minute, then
Speaker 1: it's going to set your status to away and give
Speaker 1: you a little electrical charge. And the thing that they
Speaker 1: implanted in your neck right, yeah, exactly to the countdown.
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, it's like the fucking computer and loss
Speaker 1: that you have to punch the numbers in. But yeah,
Speaker 1: and then so this is like obviously led to you know,
Speaker 1: boss is sending like humiliating emails or phone calls or
Speaker 1: they're just questioning someone's like like what are you doing?
Speaker 1: It doesn't even seem like you're doing anything? Do you
Speaker 1: even need a job? That kind of stuff. And yeah,
Speaker 1: we're finding out that now workers are having to find
Speaker 1: a way to push back against this nonsense in the
Speaker 1: form of like you're saying, a mouse mover, a simple device,
Speaker 1: a simple device that pretends that moves your mouse. As
Speaker 1: you try to eat lunch, you're like, I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: get another cup of coffee, I'm gonna go have a cigarette,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna you know, whatever you're going to do. Oh
Speaker 1: what a budget of assholes. So they have to we
Speaker 1: have to create these things because product like you said productivity, Sup, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's not a that's that hasn't been an issue. And
Speaker 1: I think like you're saying, even which is odd enough,
Speaker 1: because if you're in an office, many people will just
Speaker 1: smoke cigarettes to give themselves a reason to take a break,
Speaker 1: and you don't see people being like where, what are
Speaker 1: you smoking cigarettes? It's just accepted because then there's like
Speaker 1: the idea, it's like, well, you came to the factory today,
Speaker 1: so that at least I know if you're not if
Speaker 1: you're here, then you can't be helping your family do
Speaker 1: something navigate us incredibly stressful time. Yeah, and that's you
Speaker 1: know that that's sort of same. I think that same
Speaker 1: perspective hasn't been adopted. But these devices, like they run
Speaker 1: the fucking gamut, which is amazing because in the beginning,
Speaker 1: there was a company that started in February, like a
Speaker 1: mouse mover company, and they just did it because they're like,
Speaker 1: we know people use it for like if you're if
Speaker 1: you're looking at many different screens for like data analysis
Speaker 1: or things like that. Sometimes you just want something like that,
Speaker 1: so the computer doesn't, like it might not have the
Speaker 1: function to know that you don't want it to go
Speaker 1: to sleep or something, so you use a mouse mover
Speaker 1: for that. But then this company just saw just exponential
Speaker 1: uptick in sales since like April when they realize, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I'm being watched in my own home. And
Speaker 1: the only way to combat this is if my mouse
Speaker 1: is moving. So they have like mechanical ones that you
Speaker 1: just rest your mouths on and it just kind of
Speaker 1: goes like left or right to just kind of keep
Speaker 1: it moving. They have other like USB devices you can
Speaker 1: plug in that will just tell your computer that there's
Speaker 1: like a mouse being moved, so it well, no matter what,
Speaker 1: you can just do whatever you need to. But the
Speaker 1: observing eyes that be won't know. And some they're also
Speaker 1: just YouTube videos too. I didn't realize that have like
Speaker 1: these moving graphics and you have like if you have
Speaker 1: an optical mouse, it will actually like create like it'll
Speaker 1: create movement in the cursor again, so you can just
Speaker 1: run a video and people are going to think your work,
Speaker 1: that you're that you're doing something, and what you're really
Speaker 1: doing is playing Lord's Water Deep on Steam. But I
Speaker 1: also need to move my moster that wow, what why
Speaker 1: I've never understood. I mean, granted, I do stand up,
Speaker 1: so there's not a lot of oversight, right, And but
Speaker 1: I never understood, you know, when I when I had
Speaker 1: day jobs, why there was so many ship bags, right? Like,
Speaker 1: why what do you care? And might doing the job
Speaker 1: is like I remember I used this stuff envelopes for
Speaker 1: some gig. I worked at a nonprofit and this this
Speaker 1: My boss told me, how does stuff envelopes and addressing
Speaker 1: the bolks for this mailing? And she explained it took
Speaker 1: fifteen sixteen minutes to explain it, and then she said,
Speaker 1: you do you understand? And I said, mostly, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: probably have to ask you two more times as I
Speaker 1: do this how to do it again? And she was
Speaker 1: like what, And I said, yeah, I don't care. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't get a lot of my self esteem whether
Speaker 1: I whether I got this right the first time. I
Speaker 1: just want to do it how you want it done,
Speaker 1: because I don't like I would be really good as
Speaker 1: like a prep cook, because I don't care how I
Speaker 1: cut the vegetables, but the chef does. And most people
Speaker 1: go to work, they don't want to take it home
Speaker 1: with them. And we're not all inventors, right, So yeah,
Speaker 1: I'll do what however you want. But then when it's done,
Speaker 1: don't stare at me. I'm gonna do it and then
Speaker 1: get the hell out of my way. Yeah, there's we've
Speaker 1: talked before. The Theory of Bullshit Jobs essay and then
Speaker 1: book written by David Graber that argues that like half
Speaker 1: of the jobs of societal work is like pointless and
Speaker 1: like just there to give people give like bosses, people
Speaker 1: to boss around. And I feel like this is a
Speaker 1: huge check mark in the like evidence for that, because productivity,
Speaker 1: like you said, is up. So that's not what they're
Speaker 1: That's not what they're worrying about. They're worrying about whether
Speaker 1: you are being like, whether the quality of your life
Speaker 1: is being diminished by their talking about power and control.
Speaker 1: It's not anything about productivity and effectiveness. Yeah, or for
Speaker 1: people to recontextualize what it means to work to write,
Speaker 1: because if you're like, wait, well I'm working, but I'm
Speaker 1: also doing this other stuff, why don't I do more
Speaker 1: of that? You can't be feeling that comfortable because this
Speaker 1: whole financial system is based on the threat of homelessness
Speaker 1: and starvation to coerce you and to keep working. So
Speaker 1: I don't start loosening your definitions of what it means
Speaker 1: to survive. We can't have that, so you better have
Speaker 1: that fucking mouse moving is I don't know, very low stakes,
Speaker 1: but it's it's one of these things that's been across
Speaker 1: the board, just been denounced, you know, the Electronic Frontier
Speaker 1: Foundation cause BOSS where you know, invasive, unnecessary, unethical. The
Speaker 1: Center for Democracy and Technology called it i as being
Speaker 1: quote actively detrimental to employees health and demanding that like
Speaker 1: OSHA actually updates its policies so that like on worker
Speaker 1: safety to also include like at home workers just for
Speaker 1: like this kind of weird you know, patrol, like productivity
Speaker 1: patrol that's like unnecessary, right right, because it's not like
Speaker 1: we're not all accepting that, you know, like, there's a
Speaker 1: TV in this room this side. I don't know who
Speaker 1: else is watching, but I'm sort have accepted that I'm
Speaker 1: probably never alone, and uh, and there's cameras in this casino,
Speaker 1: in this hotel, and but there's absolutely no reason for
Speaker 1: me that for anyone to check in and go, hey,
Speaker 1: by the way, I am watching you. I'm just like
Speaker 1: the low level hum of me being watched at all
Speaker 1: times is already there. You don't need to poke. Please
Speaker 1: don't prod that open world, the Panoptic on Israel. Yeah, alright,
Speaker 1: let's talk about Patriot Front real quick. So over the
Speaker 1: weekend last weekend, about a hundred members of this far
Speaker 1: right group, Patriot Front gathered in d C to do
Speaker 1: La March, have a little speech about European diaspora or
Speaker 1: like whatever fucking codeword that code word they're using, Yeah,
Speaker 1: diaspora instead of colonialism. And that's the fun of it, right,
Speaker 1: We're a diaspora community. We we like diversity in the
Speaker 1: European country. Is that our members come from. Think this
Speaker 1: person's vaguely tan, right, but yeah, yeah, but this is
Speaker 1: the same group from Charlottesville. They just changed their name
Speaker 1: right right, right Vanguard or something right and Guard America.
Speaker 1: And that's the guy Alex Fields, who you remember, the
Speaker 1: man who killed how they're higher. He was decked out
Speaker 1: in their regalia of like you know, khakis and like
Speaker 1: polo and at the time they were like, well he
Speaker 1: he wasn't They couldn't find that he was an official member,
Speaker 1: but based on the images, you're like, well, he was
Speaker 1: definitely around it and wanting to participate. And I think
Speaker 1: that was enough for them to realize maybe a rebrand
Speaker 1: is in order. So they became Patriot Front, which is
Speaker 1: also really a really cool name as well. He's got
Speaker 1: the word patriot in it, and yeah, flags were all
Speaker 1: upside down and yeah, they love it. Because the United
Speaker 1: States is in distress. There in distress, random and they're
Speaker 1: anti maxers maskers, but they're all masked up. It was
Speaker 1: so brave. But you know they do ship like security
Speaker 1: for neo Nazis. They have like a clear leader in
Speaker 1: this like twenty three year old who has been arrested
Speaker 1: and was at the DC event. And so this isn't
Speaker 1: like this unknown or obscure group, especially to anyone that
Speaker 1: this you know, pays attention to far right extremism in
Speaker 1: this country. Yet again Republicans were just lock step in there.
Speaker 1: What this always happens, Their confusion and denial about what
Speaker 1: this group is that very much intersects with their with
Speaker 1: their party and saying things like Marjorie Taylor Gestapo. She
Speaker 1: was even saying stuff like nope, this is a quote
Speaker 1: from her like with an image of these people said
Speaker 1: no patriot group I've ever seen, whereas Khaki's stormtrooper nepads
Speaker 1: and covers their faces like they're scared. Uh huh okay,
Speaker 1: except everyone you talked to and money from, you, crazy
Speaker 1: stupid ship bag of a human. I'm so full of rage.
Speaker 1: She's she's the worst, you know how, like you have
Speaker 1: to spend like I spent a good portion of my
Speaker 1: time going oh, middle aged white women, great voted for Okay,
Speaker 1: how do I who do I? Who do I punch?
Speaker 1: But yeah, these guys so they were the vanguard ones
Speaker 1: from Charlottesville. Yeah, yeah, that's nuts. And the Republicans are
Speaker 1: pretending that they didn't, that they've never heard of them.
Speaker 1: Who they are? I don't know who who are? Well,
Speaker 1: you've been looking at my retirement of Vanguard account. That's
Speaker 1: really the tact. Yeah, for sure, but they get Yeah,
Speaker 1: the I feel like, yeah, the Republican parties like a
Speaker 1: white supremacists institution, and like the degree to which they
Speaker 1: still be treated being treated as a second, viable second
Speaker 1: party is an absolute crime. Like this is Yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean there's a lot of Oh man, there was that
Speaker 1: Twitter thread Jack that I sent you earlier that I
Speaker 1: saw it was very popular from um this professor Dr
Speaker 1: William Horne, who is just talking about I mean this,
Speaker 1: he did a whole threat about how what's happening right
Speaker 1: now and the like polarization and the fact that the
Speaker 1: Republicans are doing everything they can to completely upend or
Speaker 1: you know, just overturned whatever election results. They don't happen,
Speaker 1: who're saying this is actually kind of like worse than
Speaker 1: the Civil War, And let me tell you why. And
Speaker 1: one of the biggest things that stuck out to me
Speaker 1: was this insistence on the media and Democrats that they
Speaker 1: have a complete inability to say this thing that like
Speaker 1: the Republicans have completely turned into this like ghoulish party
Speaker 1: that it's we're not even talking about how radicalized it's become.
Speaker 1: The word bipartisanship is still used as if you're dealing
Speaker 1: with people of good faith and in general, I mean,
Speaker 1: for all the those disappointment there's for democratic leadership, it's
Speaker 1: just you do see though too, Like, especially on the news,
Speaker 1: there's no full throated sort of description of what the
Speaker 1: Republican Party is and what they're trying to do. It's
Speaker 1: just like they're becoming very aggressive with their Jerryman daring efforts,
Speaker 1: but not saying this is because they're building the framework
Speaker 1: to completely kneecap the sort of democratic process that exists
Speaker 1: in the country. It's just always a few degrees short
Speaker 1: of that, and it leaves people completely like confused to
Speaker 1: know what's happening, like right now in real time, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're gonna try and have that professor on. He teaches
Speaker 1: an entire course on like white backlash, the history of
Speaker 1: white rage and white backlash. Didn't he write a book, well,
Speaker 1: it doesn't have a new book out that is that
Speaker 1: looked fascinated. I can't remember the name of that demand
Speaker 1: The Impossible, I think is one of his, or no
Speaker 1: that came out, but I mean, but yeah, yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean he was he The thread comes about because somebody's like,
Speaker 1: so we're going to dissolve into civil war, right and
Speaker 1: he's like, actually, like that would be not the worst case.
Speaker 1: The worst case seems to be what's actually happening, which
Speaker 1: is that the white supremacy is becoming the mainstream option
Speaker 1: and there isn't enough of a you know, pushback from
Speaker 1: anyone resisting established yea from establishment, and you know, it's
Speaker 1: interest because the my new album, I have like a
Speaker 1: throwaway line that we're going through the laziest civil war
Speaker 1: right now that I've ever seen in my life. And
Speaker 1: it's a very like it's on brand, you know, the
Speaker 1: only people right now and I and I didn't put
Speaker 1: it on the album, but I was, I said, where
Speaker 1: was I? Last week? I was in Ratley, North Carolina,
Speaker 1: and I said, you know, I would tell you guys
Speaker 1: to pick up arms, because the only people right now
Speaker 1: shooting anybody are the bad guys. The bad guys are
Speaker 1: the only one that are killing everybody. And I would say,
Speaker 1: I would say that you should, you should raise arms,
Speaker 1: except for that I'm unwilling to do it right. So
Speaker 1: I don't know how. I don't know how to fight
Speaker 1: people that are willing to shoot innocent people like who
Speaker 1: were just willing to mow children down and you know,
Speaker 1: people on the street. And the the only joke that
Speaker 1: used to get a bigger laugh, what six or seven
Speaker 1: years ago, it used to get a good laugh that
Speaker 1: the Germans are going to get to be the good
Speaker 1: guys in World War three. Yeah, because if you have
Speaker 1: been's the worst thing you ever did, you get to
Speaker 1: be the hero in the sequel. And they're the only
Speaker 1: ones paying reparations, so like literally paying reparations, which is
Speaker 1: not a extreme position, it's like the right thing to do. Yeah, Yeah,
Speaker 1: there was I saw some video where some dirt bag
Speaker 1: American dude was standing outside what I guess used to
Speaker 1: be the Reichstag, and or is I don't know anything
Speaker 1: about Berlin uh, but he he did like the Nazi salute,
Speaker 1: and so German just pedestrian walked by him and plunged
Speaker 1: him right in the face. Right. It was one of
Speaker 1: the greatest I loved the It was a great thing. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I think it's it's I think it's just one
Speaker 1: of these moments two Americans have never in you know,
Speaker 1: the modern history had to really deal with some kind
Speaker 1: of issue like on the soil of America, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, Like, there's just it's it's not a
Speaker 1: it's not a problem solving, it's not necessarily problems obviously
Speaker 1: still people need. But because of the relative stability, there's
Speaker 1: just this utter lack of imagination for how bad things
Speaker 1: can get or how good things can be either. So
Speaker 1: you're just dealing with a lot of So what happens
Speaker 1: is in this space right now where a lot of
Speaker 1: people are scratching their heads, like is this bad? Like
Speaker 1: I don't think America could become a place where, like
Speaker 1: though you use the Supreme Court to create cast system
Speaker 1: and an apartheid state. Wait, they did, and they are
Speaker 1: after the Civil War, after lots of people died, and
Speaker 1: like to you know, make it so that that wasn't
Speaker 1: the case. They like, there was the backlash and then
Speaker 1: the it became official. Lot in the late sixties, though,
Speaker 1: there was a lot more rioting and a lot more
Speaker 1: and and real change happened. It wasn't exponential, Actually it
Speaker 1: was exponential from what came before. Right, But it's obviously
Speaker 1: not enough, and it's obviously there is this white supremacist
Speaker 1: backlash of well we're there, we're losing. We're losing. You know,
Speaker 1: there's not enough of something. It's this and plus, nobody
Speaker 1: is putting on uniforms and lining up. Only the dufas
Speaker 1: is of of of Vanguard, Proud Front or Patriot Front
Speaker 1: or whatever are all wearing the same chinos like they
Speaker 1: work at Old Navy and lining up and carrying flags.
Speaker 1: The original Civil War was in a different time of warfare, right,
Speaker 1: I mean, we are in a civil war because of
Speaker 1: grilla warfare, because of insurgency, because of terrorism. That's what
Speaker 1: we're in. I don't know how to I mean, nobody's
Speaker 1: lining up. We're not gonna all go stand. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna put on a blue hat. And well, I think
Speaker 1: that's what's that's what will make this new, you know,
Speaker 1: part of history even more insidious if it's unfolding the
Speaker 1: way it looks like, which is they will be people
Speaker 1: who are materially comfortable and can actually rationalize that they
Speaker 1: don't this. Yeah, things are bad, but it's not bad
Speaker 1: for me, And it's not bad enough that I need
Speaker 1: to up end my own relative stability to try and
Speaker 1: change something. Yeah, trying trying to get what is hilariously
Speaker 1: called the middle class to stand up, because there is
Speaker 1: no middle class. There is only the wealthy, of which
Speaker 1: I am one of. And I consider my wealth the
Speaker 1: fact that I live indoors, the fact that I can
Speaker 1: buy a pair of shoes and not look at the price.
Speaker 1: I mean, that's a That's a real sign of wealth
Speaker 1: to me, is that I could buy clothes and not
Speaker 1: have to be worried about how much they cost. I can.
Speaker 1: I can, And it isn't the obscenity that is billionaires.
Speaker 1: But it is real, you know. This, This the fact
Speaker 1: that I'm doing well. Yeah, And and to try to
Speaker 1: get me to do something besides tweet, besides you know,
Speaker 1: go out and stand on a corner once every six months.
Speaker 1: You know, I used to do a lot more protesting
Speaker 1: in the in the eighties, and nineties where I was
Speaker 1: on the street and it did not feel super effective
Speaker 1: like I was in the eighties. I did a lot
Speaker 1: of anti apartheid protests at college and stuff, and it
Speaker 1: it didn't feel like it did a lot, but it
Speaker 1: did help. I did feel part of something, you know,
Speaker 1: It did feel like I was doing something which is
Speaker 1: a huge need in like I think loneliness is epidemic
Speaker 1: right now, so like it does feel like they're like
Speaker 1: ways that like activism getting some community response, like dual power,
Speaker 1: Like they answer many questions that I think are are
Speaker 1: being asked or aren't being asked enough, but you know,
Speaker 1: many problems that we currently have. All right, let's uh,
Speaker 1: let's take a break and come back and talk about
Speaker 1: some bullshit shortages. And we're back, and let's look at
Speaker 1: news of Christmas shortages, which really, like our writer j
Speaker 1: I'm kind of put together a comprehensive look at like
Speaker 1: how this happens basically every year. I do also want
Speaker 1: to just add that in sort of a coalescence of
Speaker 1: stories from our dock into a artful collage. And arsonists
Speaker 1: climbed the Christmas tree sculpture outside Fox News headquarters and
Speaker 1: set it on fire and like that ship went up.
Speaker 1: So yeah, and there they are like that all they're
Speaker 1: talking about fire, But again they don't. Yeah that's all
Speaker 1: they're talking about when you know three people just got
Speaker 1: murdered last week. You know, you're just like that's the thing.
Speaker 1: You're like, oh, they're terrorists, and you're like, what about Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, well, but I mean again, that's the thing
Speaker 1: that when if that's like sort of like the momentum
Speaker 1: of how you take in the world, like through Fox You'll, You'll,
Speaker 1: it just conditions you to be outraged at the things
Speaker 1: that have nothing to do with you and completely ignore
Speaker 1: all of the things that absolutely are existential threats to
Speaker 1: your life. Yeah. Wow. So we've talked about a couple
Speaker 1: of the stories that are getting run this year, the
Speaker 1: Santa Claus shortage, which I've seen, like it seems like
Speaker 1: the implication was that it was like Fauci's fault because
Speaker 1: Santa didn't want to get vaccinated or they didn't want
Speaker 1: to have to wear masks, because they wanted to be
Speaker 1: just face to face with children the like germysts most
Speaker 1: like spittle flecked humans in existence. Yeah, but the real
Speaker 1: reason somebody actually looked at the real reason why there's
Speaker 1: a shortage of Santa is compared to last year, not
Speaker 1: compared to like all time or you know, it's a
Speaker 1: relative shortage, is that hundreds of Santa's died of COVID, right,
Speaker 1: A bunch of old guys. There were a bunch of
Speaker 1: old dudes who go morbidities. Yeah, and and hung right
Speaker 1: right there. Also not the healthiest dudes in the world.
Speaker 1: And they spend all their time around kids. Yeah, yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: Yeah did they all there was a big There was
Speaker 1: a big they killed they died, They COVID killed him. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's I mean, that's what they're They're saying that there's
Speaker 1: just a lot of people used to work as Santa's
Speaker 1: and years passed, who passed away from COVID or are
Speaker 1: hesitant to go to a job where you know, germ
Speaker 1: ridden kids sit on their lap and after all their
Speaker 1: Santa friends died, I'm assuming they're all friends with one another. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that feels like a tight knit group. Yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: they do have the Santa con so I'm sure they
Speaker 1: know each other, know that, Like they're dropping like flies.
Speaker 1: Foxes Online reporting mentioned the Santa story and and even
Speaker 1: mentioned like and you know that there have been disproportionate
Speaker 1: number of deaths. But they ended it at the They
Speaker 1: edited at the end of a SOB story about how
Speaker 1: one woman couldn't get a Santa for her country club party. Here. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's fucked up. That's not fair. It's not fair to
Speaker 1: her or her country club, yeah right, or her country Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that is so brutal. My brother has as Uh, he's
Speaker 1: in charge of the Santa for his church in Malwa.
Speaker 1: Edie said, our Santa is retiring and I was like,
Speaker 1: I think that guy has been your Santa for he
Speaker 1: goes almost twenty years. And I said, so, how old
Speaker 1: does he goes? And I was like, that guy gets
Speaker 1: to retire, you know, Ruth Bader Ginsburg gets to die.
Speaker 1: You people fuck up, These people are old. Yeah, what's next?
Speaker 1: Thanks a lot, saucy. He's retiring. He's eighty's. It turns
Speaker 1: out he'd like to sit down. So the one that
Speaker 1: got me Christmas tree shortage, we got our Christmas tree
Speaker 1: extra earlier this year because oh you got it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we got it just because you know, even I think
Speaker 1: MPR was saying, like there's a Christmas tree shortage. And so,
Speaker 1: first of all, there are like slightly less Christmas trees
Speaker 1: for sale this year because of the extreme heat and
Speaker 1: flooding caused by climate change. But according to like the
Speaker 1: National Christmas Tree Association, which is a real thing that
Speaker 1: like monitors the supply and demand for Christmas trees. According
Speaker 1: to them, there is no Christmas tree shortage. There was
Speaker 1: a oversupply of trees between two thousand fifteen, and the
Speaker 1: oversupply meant that farmers couldn't raise prices, which affected how
Speaker 1: many trees they could plant, which like then lead to
Speaker 1: the current system which so any like there's a Christmas
Speaker 1: tree shortage story is actually there's the right amount of
Speaker 1: Christmas trees that's actually right, with no leftovers the but yeah,
Speaker 1: Doug Hundley, I don't I'm sure I don't have to
Speaker 1: tell you this. But he's the spokesman for the National
Speaker 1: Christmas Tree Association. But he said shortage talk has been
Speaker 1: going on for the fifth year now, and those of
Speaker 1: us at the n c T A National Christmas Tree Association,
Speaker 1: I've tried to put water on that fire, but it
Speaker 1: just doesn't work, huh, they which shout out too. I
Speaker 1: think I heard the same thing was going on in
Speaker 1: Fox News earlier. Yeah. I just like that there's honesty
Speaker 1: and like this trade organization where they could have been
Speaker 1: like dahn, I mean, oh my god, get out reporting.
Speaker 1: Probably important to get your Christmas tree as soon as
Speaker 1: possibly like two yeah, maybe not, but they're like no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no no, Like maybe they're so they love the
Speaker 1: spirit of Christmas and like no, no, no no, no, no,
Speaker 1: it's bountiful. It's plentiful everyone. It's fine. There's gonna be
Speaker 1: some woman who has a really fancy job who goes
Speaker 1: back to her hometown and falls in love with the
Speaker 1: guy who runs the Christmas tree farm exactly every Hallmark
Speaker 1: movie here, I'm told. But guys, think about how it's
Speaker 1: affecting the wood chipper industry heading into Christmas. You know,
Speaker 1: there's fewer trees that have to go into the wood chipper,
Speaker 1: which that can't be good for I don't know, John Dear,
Speaker 1: who is a hero of errors here, right, Yeah, but
Speaker 1: it just means fewer trees are being wasted. But this
Speaker 1: is so jam like put together this list of just
Speaker 1: the past ten years, like shortage panics around Christmas supplies.
Speaker 1: So we've got Wall Street Journal from two thousand sixteen.
Speaker 1: There may not be enough eggnog this year. Ce NBC
Speaker 1: spike and eggnog sales could lead to Christmas shortage. Candy
Speaker 1: King Crisis US takeover leaves Canadian retailers shorts one by one.
Speaker 1: First of all, egg has anyone ever wanted more than
Speaker 1: one fucking glass of eggnog in their lives? Oh? When
Speaker 1: I had, I would just have like diarrhea from the
Speaker 1: amount of like fat and like how rich it was?
Speaker 1: Can we cut this with regular milk? And then and
Speaker 1: they only sell it in half gallons? And You're like,
Speaker 1: why why isn't it sold at a tiny half and
Speaker 1: half thing so that I can then have anyway kings
Speaker 1: in Canada. It's almost like Wall Street. Arnold might have
Speaker 1: like some connections with Wall Street or something. The reason
Speaker 1: for yeah, what are we gonna do? Als on a
Speaker 1: show for missing my Bye Bye drink? So candy can
Speaker 1: drought candy Cane Crisis US takeover leaves Canadian retailers short.
Speaker 1: Hake over again. I love the wording. They're like, we're
Speaker 1: fucking we have like advanced on their border or something. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: northern Michigan just running over there. We all remember two
Speaker 1: thou as the year of the Christmas missiletoe shortage, missiletoe
Speaker 1: short the telegraph Christmas kissing at threat because of missiletoe shortage. Oh.
Speaker 1: I want to find people who write headlines and bury
Speaker 1: them alive head first, paint their feet with honey, then
Speaker 1: release ants. I find deadlines to be the most infuriating.
Speaker 1: And uh wow, I mean that's yeah. A lot of
Speaker 1: people say that led to that led to the current
Speaker 1: financial crisis. You know, right, Well, that's actually that's our hour, Jackie,
Speaker 1: what it's been, and that's our hour, and that well,
Speaker 1: this has been a delight you do. First of all,
Speaker 1: can I tell you about that document you sent me
Speaker 1: and how it should be its own blog? Hundreds of
Speaker 1: pages of current event like I've already tweeted, Facebook, posted,
Speaker 1: and sent via text at least five different lengths that
Speaker 1: are on that list. Did you see this bluetooth phone
Speaker 1: that's a Fisher Price thing? And actually I don't know
Speaker 1: what I would do with it. I want it. I
Speaker 1: don't know why I wanted the Living record a living document,
Speaker 1: because it's a living document. That was terrifying once I
Speaker 1: opened it, by the way, because I hadn't got to
Speaker 1: the third paragraph, which said we're just we're not gonna
Speaker 1: do it all. Don't worry about it. Yeah, well, thank
Speaker 1: you so much for joining us. This was truly a pleasure.
Speaker 1: Where can people find you and follow you? Oh, thanks
Speaker 1: so much for having me you guys, And my name
Speaker 1: is jacky Cation and the name of my new album
Speaker 1: is Staycation. Get it because we were all at home
Speaker 1: for a second. And that's what the audience says when
Speaker 1: when you're done with your set, stay, stay, Occasion stay,
Speaker 1: and then they all carry me off, and so occasion
Speaker 1: is um. But that's how you pronounced my last name.
Speaker 1: And it's gonna do good work for people pronouncing my
Speaker 1: last name because it's uh and and everywhere is just
Speaker 1: at Jaccucation. Everything's free to listen to on all the
Speaker 1: places you listen to things. You can watch videos of
Speaker 1: me doing stand up on YouTube and all the things.
Speaker 1: And other than that, I have the two podcasts, but
Speaker 1: if you just go to jacucation dot com, thank you.
Speaker 1: Is the dork Forest a reference to the Dark Forest now.
Speaker 1: The dork Forest is a reference to a joke I
Speaker 1: did back in the early two thousand's about how I
Speaker 1: hang out with anybody and to help and the premise
Speaker 1: was is how far into the dork Forest do I
Speaker 1: have to go to get to someone I would not
Speaker 1: hang out with? And it turns out it was a
Speaker 1: Civil War reenacting cut and so and so. The Yeah,
Speaker 1: the bit itself is just sort of one of those
Speaker 1: list jokes where I list different dorky things that I
Speaker 1: have to go past two to get to the Civil
Speaker 1: War reenacting guys. So when I started the podcast, I
Speaker 1: was like, I kind of want to interview people about
Speaker 1: what they love. So the dork Forest was. There's good.
Speaker 1: There's a new sci fi book it's like the second
Speaker 1: book and the Three Body Problem trilogy that is about
Speaker 1: to be like a big show on HBO or what
Speaker 1: or Netflix I think, and it's called The Dark Forest.
Speaker 1: So oh so look forward to that being mistaken for
Speaker 1: a thousand years. Yeah, it's a hit. You just tell
Speaker 1: people the truth that they based the second book of
Speaker 1: that series off of your podcast. That's right. Have you
Speaker 1: read the n K j Emison Broken Earth trilogy. I
Speaker 1: haven't won the Hugo three years in a row. It's amazing.
Speaker 1: They're they're gonna make a TV show out of that too,
Speaker 1: It's amazing. Yeah, Okay, and is there a tweet or
Speaker 1: some of the work of social media you've been enjoying,
Speaker 1: or the one that that made me laugh and made
Speaker 1: me angry yesterday was Brent Spiner. I think I played
Speaker 1: data on Next Track Star Trek the Next Generation. He
Speaker 1: tweeted something like, is this right? I spent a night
Speaker 1: in jail for parking tickets, but you can just say
Speaker 1: no to congressional subpoenas. And I was like, that was
Speaker 1: That was my current one yesterday that made me laugh
Speaker 1: in full of brag, Right, Miles, where can people find you?
Speaker 1: What's tweet you've been enjoying? Find me on Twitter and
Speaker 1: Instagram at Miles of Gray and also the other podcast
Speaker 1: four twenty Day Fiance with Sophia Alexandra, where we just
Speaker 1: talk about our favorite show, ninety Day Fiance in all
Speaker 1: its iterations. A tweet that I like first one is
Speaker 1: from make Oxtail Cheap Again at c sim Simmas tweeted
Speaker 1: they really had us baby millennials dressing business casual to
Speaker 1: go to the club, and for anybody who was hitting
Speaker 1: the clubs and the odds and the tens, there was
Speaker 1: just the weirdest dress codes back then. Yeah, you really
Speaker 1: had to look on some button up like leather shoe nonsense,
Speaker 1: and we were dressing. I mean, look they were. We're
Speaker 1: all being indoctrinated for our jobs as uh, you know,
Speaker 1: middling corporate workers. Then the next one is from Jen
Speaker 1: Richards at smart ass Gen tweeted, Hey, in case you
Speaker 1: weren't already feeling old today, I just heard an intern
Speaker 1: say they loved Successions new weekly drop model and that
Speaker 1: it was a smart way to get people looked. There
Speaker 1: you go, I mean that is it's innovative. They're they're
Speaker 1: at the cutting edge of content of reinventing television. Welcome,
Speaker 1: they've done it all right. Derek at Derek three three,
Speaker 1: I think that's their phone number, so I want redressed.
Speaker 1: I said, when someone is knighted by the queen, they
Speaker 1: should have to fight for the queen. They should have
Speaker 1: sent Paul McCartney to Iraq, which I just wish they
Speaker 1: had done that. And at Mark Dubbs tweeted, just got
Speaker 1: my fourth wall blown out by Kurt vond to get
Speaker 1: which I liked. To find me on Twitter at Jack
Speaker 1: Underscore O'Brien, you can find us on Twitter at Daily Zeitgeist.
Speaker 1: We're at the Daily Zeitgeist on Instagram, we have Facebook
Speaker 1: fan page and a website, Daily zigeist dot com where
Speaker 1: he post our episodes and our footnotes where we link
Speaker 1: off to the information that we talked about in today's episode,
Speaker 1: as well as a song that we think you might enjoy. Miles,
Speaker 1: what song do you think people might enjoy? Let's do
Speaker 1: a track by Pluma Blue. I think maybe I've done
Speaker 1: one Puma Blue track before, but Bluoma Blues like just
Speaker 1: one of these amazing artists who's like a singer, songwriter, producer,
Speaker 1: multi like just does it all. Uh, and their music
Speaker 1: is just so so just rich and it it feels
Speaker 1: good like there's you can you can feel the musicianship
Speaker 1: in it and the creativity. So this is track from
Speaker 1: Puma Blue called Oil Slick, So check that one out alright. Well.
Speaker 1: The Daily Zey Guys a production by Heart Radio. For
Speaker 1: more podcasts from My Heart Radio, visit the I Heart
Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple Podcaster, wherever wherever fine podcasts are given
Speaker 1: away for free. That is going to do it for
Speaker 1: us this morning. But we are back this afternoon to
Speaker 1: tell you what's trending, and we will talk to y'all then.
Speaker 1: Bobby Bye,