Jem Girls Podcast

What exactly is “Wicca envy”? Is it a scented candle with the fragrance of sage and patchouli handcrafted by some white woman in her late thirties named Jennifer (although she goes by Amethyst now) and sold at your local farmers market for $35? Does said white lady also sell mugs that say things like “100% That Witch”, “Resting Witch Face”, and “Witch, Please”? 

Or is “Wicca envy” what you feel when you see a hot W.I.T.C.H (Woman In Total Control of Herself) strutting down the street with her hot caftan and bangles jangling with every step, her pussy clenched tightly around a yoni egg? (Of course, you can’t see her pussy but you know it’s doing the absolute most at all times).

Well, in this episode of Charmed, “Wicca envy” describes Rex and Hannah’s obsession with stealing the Charmed Ones’ powers once and for all. Rex uses a new power he gained to control everyone’s minds, frame Prue for stealing some tiara, seduce Phoebe, and get Prue to murder a janitor with a tiny piece of wood (I am still not sure how that even happened).

Our favourite witches not only narrowly avoid losing their powers, but Prue also SOMEHOW escapes criminal charges (AGAIN). These really are the “Charmed Ones” because these bitches have the best luck of anyone who has ever lived. Now I have Wicca envy.