You Are Not A Frog

You Are Not A Frog

The podcast for GPs, hospital doctors and other professionals in high-stakes, high-stress jobs who want to thrive rather than just survive. You studied for years, you’re really good at what you do but you’ve noticed that you’re starting to feel overwhelmed, overworked and under-resourced. You may be comparing yourself to a frog in boiling water - the heat has built up so slowly that you haven’t noticed the extra-long days becoming the norm. You may feel on the edge and trapped in the very job that you’ve spent years working towards. Here’s the problem, frogs only have two choices; stay and be boiled alive, or jump out of the pan. The good news is that you are not a frog. You have many more choices than you think you do. You don’t have to quit, and nor should stress and burnout be inevitable. It is possible to be master of your own destiny, to craft your work life and career so that you can thrive even in the most difficult of situations. There are simple changes you can make which will make a huge difference to your stress levels and help you enjoy life again...

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episode 200: What Shame Made Me Do

If you have a high-stakes job like medicine, shame can show up in unexpected and unwelcome places. Doctors have incredibly high societal expectations, with constant pressure to be invulnerable. It’s time to challenge these unrealistic expectations and foster an environment that supports doctors in their vulnerability.

This week, we’re featuring one of our most popular and impactful episodes from 2023 to help you identify and combat shame. In this episode, Dr Sandy Miles discusses the impact of shame on doctors and how we can address it by changing the toxic stories we tell ourselves.

We all make mistakes, but shame keeps us from being objective and fair, leading us feeling like we’re inherently bad or wrong. Finding ways to be kinder and more supportive to ourselves will help not only our wellbeing, but will brighten the lives of those closest to us.

Listen to this episode to
  • Discover the powerful impact shame has on us, and how our wellbeing and professional identity can be affected
  • Explore the different ways we respond to shame
  • Learn how to create a healthier and more supportive environment

Episode highlights
  • [00:04:37] What is shame?
  • [00:11:56] How identities are tied to shame
  • [00:15:16] How people respond to shame
  • [00:17:40] How to respond to shame
  • [00:26:43] Shame and perfectionism in healthcare
  • [00:31:31] How to overcome maladaptive perfectionism
  • [00:34:22] Fostering a growth mindset
  • [00:36:44] How to combat shame
  • [00:47:01] Where to find help
  • [00:48:40] Sandy's top tips for deadling with shame

About the guest

Sandy Miles is a practising GP and a medical educator. She is also the co-founder of Acacia Retreat, holding bi-annual retreats for doctors feeling overwhelmed. Passionate to help fellow medical professionals, Sandy has written several research articles about shame and maladaptive behaviours in the medical industry — such as perfectionism in healthcare workers.

Sandy gained her Bachelor of Medicine from the University of London and then earned her Master of Science in Medical Humanities from King’s College London.

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Resources
  • THRIVE Weekly Planner
  • More episodes of You Are Not a Frog:
  • How to Avoid Becoming the Second Victim – Episode 92, with Dr Caraline Wright & Dr Lizzie Sweeting
  • This is Going to Hurt: Secret Diaries of a Junior Doctor, by Adam Kay
  • Books and videos from Brene Brown
  • Shame and Medicine
  • Shame in Medicine: The Lost Forest, a 10-part documentary podcast produced by the Nocturnists
  • Shame and Medicine
  • Mindset: Changing the Way You Think to Fulfil Your Potential, by Carol Dweck
  • Download the episode’s workbook and CPD form. You can use them for reflection and to submit for your appraisal.

Enjoyed this episode?

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Connect with Rachel

Have any questions? Contact Rachel through these platforms:

  • LinkedIn: @Dr-Rachel-Morris
  • Twitter: @DrRachelMorris
  • Email: hello@youarenotafrog.com

Find out more about our training

Mentioned in this episode:

FrogFest – March 2024

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 December 26, 2023  54m