You Look Nice Today

A Journal of Emotional Hygiene, staffed by lonelysandwich, scottsimpson, and hotdogsladies.

https://www.youlooknicetoday.com

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episode 46: Poolside


ATTENTION! POOL RULES!
  • Free swim Thursdays 4:00 - 4:15.
  • Shower before entering pool. Also, shave before entering pool.
  • This is a “Body Shame Free” zone. You must keep your eyes closed at all times.
  • Chairs may only be saved with a passport, $50 bill, or a signed photo of Burt Reynolds.
  • Towels available for a small fee—ask the Towel Troll for details.
  • Water in the pool is a privilege, not a right!
  • Just going to be honest here about going #1 and #2: going #1 is way less of a big deal than you think. Going #2 is way more of a big deal than you think.
  • Do NOT talk to Randy about 9/11.
  • NO CANADIANS

Also: what’s your theme song; Adam the lion; cloggin’ a drain; seeing yourself in a mirror; grits etc.; Burt Reynolds; peeing on Car 17; splashing is not drowning; pool chairs for everyone bro; browsing TV Guide; Robin Hood of chaises; an original Playstation; The Meerkats and the Laundry Bag; nipples in a crawlspace; ask Quora; the sausage sweats.


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 2012-10-02  36m