You Look Nice Today

A funny thing happened on the way to the waterbed. On August 1, minutes before we were set to record a fresh episode, Merlin purchased a scratch-off lottery ticket and hit the jackpot! Because of a pinkie promise we made long ago (and thankfully videotaped), Merlin was compelled to bequeath 100% of the winnings to the YLNT Trust.

We went nuts: luxury suite in Ibiza, hookers and blow for miles, Lindsay Lohan reading about us in whatever magazine regular celebrities read to catch up on the personal lives of mega-celebrities. Swan-shaped paddle boats.

On August 3 (there was a minor misunderstanding about how far the $1,500 jackpot would stretch) we returned home.

Then our fortunes took a turn for the worse.

To be continued.