A story about human connection told through a voice-forward matchmaking experiment. The twist: no names, no direct contact, no pictures. Over 30 days, matched pairs exchange 1 voice memo a day with each other. This genre-bending series has the intimacy of a personal memoir, suspense from a reality TV dating show, and insights from an interview show. Through 6 episodes, I share 6 lessons I learned from this experience, told 1 pair at a time. Yes, some pairs do end up in a relationship afterwards. Eavesdrop into their private conversations and hear how these strangers fall into like, reciprocate vulnerability, and develop intimacy. We all want to be heard, but we forgot how to listen. This is what human connection sounds like. Check out itsnicetohearyou.com and follow on Instagram @itsnicetohearyou.
https://www.itsnicetohearyou.com/
episode 1: Ep 1. Once Upon a Time, a Girl Needs a Distraction in Quarantine
YVES & HEATHER: A lesson on reflection. The king asked, what is the hardest thing to look at? Meet me, the matchmaker and host, Yves D. Ropper. In March 2020, I was laid off and quarantining alone in a 1 bedroom apartment in Manhattan. In search of connection, I create an anonymous matchmaking experiment on a whim. The twist - no pictures, no names, no direct contact. They can only get to know each other by exchanging 1 voice memo a day, for 30 days. I solicit 100 strangers to participate and within just a couple days, people started sending 40 minute long voice memos to their matches. From behind the scenes, I listened to my participants. By the end of my experiment, I collected 100+ hours of audio from their voice memos. What I heard was empathy, acceptance, and real intimacy. They are all strangers to me, yet after listening to their voices, I feel connected to them. This story is as much about the experiment, its participants, and how it forced me to see myself. Listen to how Yves met Heather.
3 things to explore after this:
1. Essay by Mandy Len Catron for the Modern Love column in the New York Times - “To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This” https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/style/modern-love-to-fall-in-love-with-anyone-do-this.html
2. Ted talk by Helen Fisher on the biochemical foundations behind love - “Why We Love, Why We Cheat” (23 min video) https://www.ted.com/talks/helen_fisher_why_we_love_why_we_cheat
3. The research paper behind the 36 questions by Professor Arthur Aron and colleagues - “The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness: A Procedure and Some Preliminary Findings https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0146167297234003