The Relaxed Male is a podcast dedicated to empowering men to build healthier, more fulfilling relationships in all areas of their lives. Whether it's romantic partnerships, family bonds, friendships, or professional connections, this show provides insights and actionable advice for building and maintaining positive relationships grounded in mutual understanding, respect, and care. Each episode delves into the unique challenges and opportunities men face when it comes to fostering meaningful connections. The host Bryan assists men in understanding how the elements of how one approaches a problem can hinder relationship growth. Through thought-provoking discussions, real-life examples, and practical exercises, listeners gain valuable tools to improve their listening skills, empathy, vulnerability and thoughts needed for building trust and intimacy with those around them. The show also covers the importance of self-awareness, personal growth, and taking responsibility for one's actions and their impact on others. Ultimately, The Relaxed Male aims to empower men to have strong relationships without sacrificing who they are in the process...
https://www.relaxedmale.com
episode 220: Your Participation Trophies In Life
Why do we get participation trophies?
Easy bump of Satisfaction
Empty victory
How are you giving yourself participation trophies?
Staying busy for the sake of busy or are you actually taking steps to go forward?
Finding other things to do than what needs to be done.
Buffering
Example watching porn is you taking the participation prixe instead of actually building the connection withyour wife so that you have that much wanted intamacy.
How are you taking the participation trophies of life? How are you going to stop? let me know in the comments section below.
Want to start reaching for the real trophies in life? To do so take the next step
Get Coached for 3 months for only $300 Sign up for special Coaching Offer
SummaryThe episode argues that many people, especially men, settle for metaphorical "participation trophies" in their relationships instead of putting in the hard work required for a truly fulfilling relationship. Just like kids getting participation trophies in sports for merely showing up, adults give themselves participation trophies in relationships by engaging in avoidance behaviors and buffering techniques like drinking, watching porn, playing video games, etc. instead of doing the emotional labor to build intimacy.
The host says these participation trophies in relationships provide an "empty victory" and hollow satisfaction, preventing true growth. For example, watching porn is the participation trophy instead of putting in effort to foster emotional and sexual intimacy with one's partner. Drinking after a hard day is the participation trophy instead of having a real discussion about issues with a spouse.
The host urges men to stop settling for these relationship participation trophies. Instead, put in the work like pursuing personal growth, having vulnerable conversations, doing activities to nurture the relationship, etc. - which leads to the true "win" of a rich, fulfilling partnership. Giving up the participation trophy mindset and buffering behaviors is hard, but necessary to achieve relationship success beyond just going through the motions.
00:00:00 The Impact of Participation Trophies
00:11:31 Striving for Success Beyond Participation Trophies
00:16:27 Taking Action to Remove Participation Trophies