Wire Talk with Karen Stubbs

WT 082: I Didn't Know I Had To Prepare For That: Anticipating The Unexpected

by Karen Stubbs | Birds on a Wire | Wire Talk Podcast

http://traffic.libsyn.com/wiretalk/WT_082_AnticipatingTheUnexpected.mp3

As moms, we’re constantly thinking about what’s next. We meal prep, we pack diaper bags, we schedule appointments, we run errands; but, every now and then we run into situations in which we don’t know how to prepare. Coming across the unexpected can really throw a wrench into an otherwise planned and routine day, week, month, or year! In this episode, listen to Karen weigh in on multiple scenarios of unexpected situations submitted by moms, like you.

Question 1: Karen, I never realized how embarrassed kids can make me. I thought it was supposed to be reverse. From my 2-year-old sobbing in Costco to my 4-year-old innocently, but loudly, pointing out things to strangers like “that lady is old!” or “that man is stinky.” How do you recover from your kids just flat out embarrassing you??

Karen’s Answer: I think you have to develop a good sense of humor and not take life so seriously. Kids will be kids! If they did everything perfect all the time, they wouldn’t need a mom. Consider it good job security for you and me!

My children were constantly embarrassing me with things they did or said. I had to realize they weren’t doing it out of spite, but were genuine when they would say, “That man stinks.” Children don’t usually have a filter, that’s where our role as mom comes into play.

Here’s one thing we taught Taylor when he was younger: just because something is true doesn’t mean it should be shared. Our words can hurt people even if we don’t intend to hurt. Teach your child the phrase ‘be self aware’.  

Question 2: Karen, how do I guard my kids from all that comes with technology? I thought getting a cell phone in high school was a big step, but my 11 year old is already asking me for a phone and iPad. I worry about what her classmates are potentially exposing her to.  

Karen’s Answer: Well the truth of the matter is she doesn’t need her friends to expose her. She can find a lot on her own without even looking. You can type in a seemingly innocent phrase or object and all kinds of things pop up. How do you deal with it? If she’s old enough to have those devices, you will have to tell her the good and the bad of them. Teach her what to stay away from and what is okay. I would also put a lock on her device and have the capability to monitor all her activity.

I know 11 seems so young to have these conversations, but our society is moving at warp speed. That doesn’t mean that you need to move fast; but, if you get anything with wifi, you should have a conversation with your child.

Question 3: Dinnertime is a total battlefield. Any advice for getting kids to try new things?

Karen’s Answer: Introduce new things slowly and try not to make a big deal out of it.  Children’s taste buds change throughout childhood. If they don’t like it now, it doesn’t mean they won’t like it later. I used to tell my children, “Try one bite. If you don’t like it, that’s okay. But, try it.” I know it’s hard, but what in motherhood isn’t hard? Keep working with them and don’t get discouraged.

Question 4:  Karen, when I was pregnant with my second it felt like the right time to step away from working outside the home to be a stay-at-home mom. Now that my 2nd is about 6 months old, I am so incredibly bored. I expected to be exhausted, not bored. I’m even considering going back to work for a little stimulation for both myself and the kids. How do I decide what’s right for us?

Karen’s Answer: Wow! This is a hard question, and one I don’t think I can answer for you. Give it a few more months before making a decision either way. I felt the same way with Kelsey. Once she reached 9 months old, I wasn’t bored anymore.  Those first few months are boring or it was to me. It depends on how high capacity of a person you are. I tend to be high capacity, and I was bored. But, like I said, that eventually went away. Pray about it and give it 6 more months.

Ask Karen a Question! We want to hear your questions—Keep them coming! Thank you, moms. Have a great day!