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episode 33: Teaching Children About Porn
Having a conversation about pornography or masturbation should be as simple as talking about Legos. That’s a really helpful frame for a lot of parents, who just haven’t even conceived of that. Our parents were not taught to teach us that way, so it’s a little bit of a leap for a lot of parents to realize that, “You know what, this doesn’t have to be awkward. This can actually be a great conversation.”Dina Alexander, founder and president of Educate and Empower Kids
Victims of betrayal and emotional abuse often wonder how to approach and talk with their children about pornography, masturbation, and other sexual topics.
While it can be triggering for betrayed women, it is healthy and necessary to educate and empower their children regarding pornography. On the BTR Podcast, Anne spoke with Dina Alexander, founder and president of Educate and Empower Kids. Dina outlines empowering tips to help mothers have these important conversations with their children.
Tune in to the free BTR podcast and read the full transcript below for more.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZT2JrP4s_c
Teaching Kids About Pornography: It's How You Say It
They’re not going to remember everything we teach. They’re going to remember our tone and our level of care.Dina Alexander, founder and president of Educate and Empower Kids
It is important for mothers to create an environment of openness and honesty. While trauma may impact victims' levels of comfort when talking about sexual topics, it can help children and teens to ask questions, discuss ideas, and process their own trauma when homes are places where conversation and questions are allowed and encouraged.
"Casual Conversation" Can Have A Huge Impact
While it may seem natural to use a formal setting for discussing sex and pornography with children, it is better to use a casual, comfortable approach.
This conveys that sex and pornography are not forbidden topics, only to be talked about one night a year, but rather, topics that children and teens are free to bring up and ask questions about at any time.
We can still have that impact in a casual conversation. If it’s an important topic, you can pull the car over and turn around and look at your kids, and let them know, “This is really important,” or, “This is something amazing and special,” or, “You are amazing and special.”Dina Alexander, founder and president of Educate and Empower Kids
Dina explains that mothers can discuss these topics with their children in the car, folding laundry, on a walk, eating dinner... any time is a good time to open up discussion about sexuality.
Teach Children to Deconstruct Harmful Messages
Advertisements, social media, movies, TV shows, music, and more can convey harmful and dangerous messages about body image, the normalization of pornography, and what is and is not okay sexually.
As mothers teach children how to deconstruct these messages, children and teens are empowered to take control of what they are exposed to, rather than live in fear and confusion.
Teach your kids to deconstruct media and what they see online.