Betrayal Trauma Recovery

btr.org - Betrayal Trauma Recovery is an online, daily support group for victims of emotional & psychological abuse and sexual coercion. Join a live session today. For women experiencing pain, chaos, and isolation due to their husband’s abuse: lying, gaslighting, manipulation, porn use, cheating, infidelity, emotional abuse, and narcissistic abuse. Codependency or labeling a woman as codependent is a form of victim blaming. Pornography addiction / sex addiction are a domestic abuse issue. Narcissistic abuse is not a communication issue. We help women who are in a relationship, separated, or divorced navigate to recover and heal by establishing safety through boundaries. If you suspect your husband is a narcissist, a pornography addict, or emotionally abusive, this podcast is for you. Every woman on our team has experienced abuse and betrayal trauma first hand. For past podcasts visit our website: btr.org

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D-Day Story: I Gave Up Trying To Stop My Husband's Pornography Addiction


How Sex Addiction Affected My Home

As the wife of a sex addict for 30 years, she had many D-days. For a wife, pornography use feels just like a betrayal. For two reasons:

1. The lies surrounding pornography addiction are a betrayal in and of themselves. Lies are traumatizing to a wife.

2. The infidelity of the pornography use and masturbation. A man who uses pornography and masturbates cannot be emotionally or sexually faithful to his wife.

Lying Is A Form Of Abuse

On this particular day, she gave up. Her marriage situation was no longer tenable. This was the beginning of her recovery. Before this, she had focused so much on her husband's needs, enabling the addiction to continue. Abusive men lie. Don't believe what he tells out yourself. If a man cheats, it is 100% his responsibility. He will try to channel your anger toward anything and everything else.  Sex addicts love to portray themselves as unable to control their hormonal urges. Which is yet another lie. Abusive men may also create the impression that their anger or infidelity is a product of how passionate they are - but in reality, passion, kindness and faithfulness are entirely compatible. Being dishonest, abusive and unfaithful has nothing to do with passion.

When someone lies to you, they take away your dignity. Kant said that a person's intrinsic worth (human dignity) allows them to act as rational as possible and make their own decisions. But when you're being lied to, it harms your dignity by purposefully withholding key information that a person needs to make key decisions.


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 2016-05-09  1m